I was just wondering
Where is your heart?
You seem emptier
Than most

Silence

No love here
I left that *******
Years ago
You see

Abandonment

What a shame
Perhaps I can
Repair the bond

Boldness

Just a *****
Go back home girl
Mama's calling

Naivety

You look so lonely
You look so cold
Let me warm you up

Temptation

Family gone
Weren't you raised better?
You'll only cause trouble

Allure

But mama taught me
Everything I know
I'm a follower*

Persistence

Can't do
Any harm
Right?

Disgrace

She read my journal
My internal thoughts spewed out of her mouth like *****.
Anger. Regret.

I saw him as a book then
And he was easily read
Flipping through his memories, I found tainted history
Tears

Oh, woe is me
this girl, she knows everything.
My incestuous mind
unkind and dark
genuinely written without hesitation

Yet here I stand
Confused, taken aback
Stricken with...
...curiosity, perhaps
Sadness and unknowing
And his eyes apologize while his frown regrets

Perhaps she now feels closer.
There's nothing to hide inside
A relief.
I am disgusted by your actions.

I wonder if he still loves me
He won't take the words back
Ink never erases, and scars remain
And so does my heart
Rooted to my sleeve yet chained to his palm

"I'm sorry", I forget to say
Words so typical end up filling the room
breaking all glass
You made me like this
my words are a byproduct of your insanity
You're sad.
Yes, sad. We are all sad.
You are not entitled to read such things
wretch

I peered into your soul today
Something twisted and half alive
Fault?
A face, my face to place blame
I'll never walk away
Without another war wound
But I'll bleed you dry
Should I question morality? Am I human?
What happened to us?

You seek knowledge, yet cower in its presence
" all loving" I mock the idea
for you despise my words.
My work.
What are they, but a part of me?
Your voice is timid
Your despair, unsettling..
speak

Silence is all I want to hear anymore...

I often digress that I
Am sick and tired of all you poets
With all your literal genius
The hypocrisy is mine

I must say, that I;
against all grain, have established
Individualism
Not synonymous
With hubris

For some time
I waded through the shallow
Darkness, seeking closure
All I found was me

Sitting in the corner

Alone

So I grabbed my hand, and said:
"You can rebel and yell music get tattoos kiss girls eat sweets and...
...love yourself"
And I believed me

Just another
Amateur poem
From the happiest girl
On the saddest world

Subject of forced indoctrination
Given a placebo of hope
And made to look at society
Through artificial eyes

Just another disfigured mind
Molded through the
Systematic eradication
Of constitutional freedoms

Walking with a knife in your spine
And shackles on your head
And the force-fed propaganda
Giving a false notion
Of a peaceful reality

Is this what you want?

Step away from the wires of captivity
The Automated Deity of our future

Be one with yourself

Be reborn

Not recreated

I wish my temples could grow wings
So my mind
Could separate from my body
And fly high
Away from me

Body
Ice
Eyes
Blind
Breath
Shallow

You
Fire
Eyes
Intent
Breath
­Shudder

Touch
Shock
Back
Arch
Toes
Clench

Love
Hot
Eyes
Closed­
Breath
Heavy

Me
You
We
Two
Love
True

She had an option now
Once a goal, fed until wings spread until flight took until she lost the town
Until shot down
She had an option now, a full fledged choice, all teeth and silence
In the wake of her indecision grew envy, which looks like a giant mosquito, if you believe in giants

Before we go towards sore mode and mope so hopelessly over "wrote poetry", let us take time to give the mosquito a little appreciation
Unlike choice, envy is a toothless *******, and instead pokes and prods and leaves an undesirable little welt
But like choice, envy hovers
Waiting

She slept on cardboard that night
That night in particular was rather dreary, grey and wet
Kicked out of her home, alone so closed and prone to no hope
She dove to floor and groped dope to erode her dome

Black

She hit that stash and sat back happy in mad hat fantasies
Mad hat had-to-be's and lap dance reveries she tapped untapped man, she gagged for bags and haggled deep

Back then, she was a pariah,
She floated and she owned it, turned around and wrote it and low and behold she sold it, and now she's bold poet

Funny how the world wants you when you don't need it
Funny how a girl flaunts too, for the temporary feeling

We swat bugs who want a fix

But when they're butterflies...

They flutter by

Lighten this part
With the brighter visions

Call on healing
Pain into remission

What you could gain
Strikes hope into
The heart of the sun

This boat
Once a ship of sorrow
Will land on a beach tomorrow
And it's vacation
Hopes creation

Those tears of solitude, you thought
to sink your boat
But instead you cried off the deck
So they kept you afloat

And the sun above, caressing your face...
Enveloping love, shining embrace

As angels cut their wings
We see them fall with a purpose

They wish not to fly any longer
But to swim alongside you on this journey

Because in school, I was taught
To care

Oh speak to me
Goddess
Angel
Who wears her blue
Halo
Around her neck
Awaken
My dollar eyed deity
And point your fingers
Full of bills
To the answer
Or the lie
Spread your
Deceitful wings
And embrace the lost
Fill them
With greed
And show them
The paper and metal
Pathway to
Sadness
For the weak
Always
Kneel to your
Valuable allure

How wonderful
To sit under these stars
Free of worry at least for a night
Maybe a sip of wine
Maybe a few more

And maybe a warm blanket
And your favorite music
Ringing softly in your ears
From that old radio
You thought you'd never use again

Maybe a silent awe
For all things beautiful
And maybe
The warm notion of peace
And tranquility
Massaging your weary shoulders

And maybe
A gentle kiss
Of dreamless sleep

Anybody?

Only the open sky
Could take my wings
Mold them into essences of purity

I was forged within
Rapid rivers of forsaken modesty
Left alone and sore below
Because my insecurities undressed me
And bedded me savagely
Before the watchful eye of the moon
The minds glowing aphrodisiac

As feathered hate falls from blackened flight
A finger is raised in denial of sunlight
A symbol of woebegone sensuality