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"muddle" poems
Hands shake after intake of brown and green. Catch the breath keep it till it leaves. Pretend, through the muddle, that this hasten heart beat isn't bumping blood cells filled with defeat, that the O2 isn't poisoning the alveoli that absorb it, sending this brain, and all it entails, straight to hell.
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Jun 27, 2013
Jun 27, 2013 at 12:04 AM UTC
Respiratory System
We chase the ghosts of youth, with glove and bat and ball; running down the base-paths, hoping we don't fall. Like honey in slow motion, we make our way to first; panting... out of breath, we hope our lungs don't burst. If we're in the outfield, we've "lost" the legs to run; but it's the game we treasure, it's mostly to have fun. We laugh at our mistakes, strikeouts and dropped flies; it's but play... that we seek, not self -regretted sighs. Long gone, the grace of youth, we muddle through the game; and rest upon the off days, tired... happy... lame.
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Mar 11, 2015
Mar 11, 2015 at 1:24 PM UTC
Senior softball.
It's a nightmare of a journey Through the Rose Hills. White roses cover death Along side the 50mph ride. We'll speed down the boulevard Turning right, swerving left. Drink some beer on Broadway, Smoke some cigarettes at CVS. Then I'll fill your heart with rose petals And regret. You grin and whisper gently I'll meet you in Whittier at Sunset. Lets muddle through Greenleaf Under a cerulean sky. I got lost in the time held in your eyes. I stumble back to only trip into your disguise. Only to drown in your lips and lies. Dragging our souls to Hellman's and back, I'll find you on Hadley letting the sun in, Wilted in Whittier at sunset.
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Apr 5, 2014
Apr 5, 2014 at 8:37 PM UTC
Whittier at Sunset
Does a fish go *** when it's swimming in the sea? Does it ever get the notion when it's swimming in the ocean? Does a fish take a leak when it's swimming in the creek? Do they do it in a muddle when you see them in a puddle? And then, for goodness sake, do they go while in the lake? Could you see a yellow gleam as they do it in the stream? Does a fish go *** when it's swimming in the sea?
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Jun 12, 2013
Jun 12, 2013 at 1:11 PM UTC
Do Fish ***
These shots were never taken by chance They were of anger taken under sunshine This smoke can oh so muddle your view of the truth They use smoke of their own to hide their intentions But the truth can be seen rolling by, glinting red The weapon of black turns their eyes white  One shines with tears; the other dull and ***** The greedy man hides the youth of all seventeen It could have been stopped And the young could continue This is preventable But he continues to enable His smiles are swamp green His words are shiny gold But he hides it all behind his suit of blue
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Sep 14, 2018
Sep 14, 2018 at 8:45 AM UTC
Sunny's Gun
The puppy sat by the door. Near dying to go out. Crying an abysmal wail As if a naughty child. Pawed and clawed the kitchen door. No-one heard the honey pup. Everyone was out. Owner running late for work. Neglected to let her run. However could she forget. It got to six a clock at night. No-body came. The tension built up. Fluid build up. Exploded sweet pup. (metaphorically of course) Owner came home. Just couldn't be cross. Cleaned up the muddle-some puddle. Gave her puppy a hug. Smiled to herself. Said to puppy how sorry she was. Cautionary tale acquired from here. No matter how ever late you ever may be. Put your cute puppy out to *** By ladylivvi1 © 2013 ladylivvi1 (All rights reserved)
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Sep 29, 2013
Sep 29, 2013 at 9:36 AM UTC
Puppy!
The *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat: If you offer him pheasant he would rather have grouse. If you put him in a house he would much prefer a flat, If you put him in a flat then he’d rather have a house. If you set him on a mouse then he only wants a rat, If you set him on a rat then he’d rather chase a mouse. Yes the *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat— And there isn’t any call for me to shout it: For he will do As he do do And there’s no doing anything about it! The *** Tum Tugger is a terrible bore: When you let him in, then he wants to be out; He’s always on the wrong side of every door, And as soon as he’s at home, then he’d like to get about. He likes to lie in the bureau drawer, But he makes such a fuss if he can’t get out. Yes the *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat— And there isn’t any use for you to doubt it: For he will do As he do do And there’s no doing anything about it! The *** Tum Tugger is a curious beast: His disobliging ways are a matter of habit. If you offer him fish then he always wants a feast; When there isn’t any fish then he won’t eat rabbit. If you offer him cream then he sniffs and sneers, For he only likes what he finds for himself; So you’ll catch him in it right up to the ears, If you put it away on the larder shelf. The *** Tum Tugger is artful and knowing, The *** Tum Tugger doesn’t care for a cuddle; But he’ll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing, For there’s nothing he enjoys like a horrible muddle. Yes the *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat— And there isn’t any need for me to spout it: For he will do As he do do And theres no doing anything about it!
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7.3k
The *** Tum Tugger
The *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat: If you offer him pheasant he would rather have grouse. If you put him in a house he would much prefer a flat, If you put him in a flat then he’d rather have a house. If you set him on a mouse then he only wants a rat, If you set him on a rat then he’d rather chase a mouse. Yes the *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat— And there isn’t any call for me to shout it: For he will do As he do do And there’s no doing anything about it! The *** Tum Tugger is a terrible bore: When you let him in, then he wants to be out; He’s always on the wrong side of every door, And as soon as he’s at home, then he’d like to get about. He likes to lie in the bureau drawer, But he makes such a fuss if he can’t get out. Yes the *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat— And there isn’t any use for you to doubt it: For he will do As he do do And there’s no doing anything about it! The *** Tum Tugger is a curious beast: His disobliging ways are a matter of habit. If you offer him fish then he always wants a feast; When there isn’t any fish then he won’t eat rabbit. If you offer him cream then he sniffs and sneers, For he only likes what he finds for himself; So you’ll catch him in it right up to the ears, If you put it away on the larder shelf. The *** Tum Tugger is artful and knowing, The *** Tum Tugger doesn’t care for a cuddle; But he’ll leap on your lap in the middle of your sewing, For there’s nothing he enjoys like a horrible muddle. Yes the *** Tum Tugger is a Curious Cat— And there isn’t any need for me to spout it: For he will do As he do do And theres no doing anything about it!
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39
Even on nights when you can't muddle through Count your blessings I tell you Look to the sky, oh, so blue Watch the leaves as the wind blows through Count your blessings day and night To keep your curses out of sight
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May 16, 2017
May 16, 2017 at 3:58 PM UTC
Thanksgiving
(1) There’s one thing I must get off my chest that’s bothered me now even 50 years on with the passage of time – my English teacher then she always told me when I grumbled homework was too difficult, she’d tell me: “That’s a piece of cake” And I’d go home discombobulated how anyone could eat paper or homework and she said this not once, but every time: “It’s a piece of cake” (2) And my parents and I looked at it every which way and from every point of view and concluded in our Perfect Ancient Native language: *“This English teacher is a loony. She is wooly-headed. She is the lamb Mary lost, silly and muddle-headed. How can homework be a piece of cake? Anyway, we don’t eat cake – we eat samosas.”* (3) And yet the English teacher would put her nose up in the air and remonstrate: “It’s a piece of cake!” Oh yeah, would you like tea with it? Now, my parents, bless their Ancient Souls, have gone on into the next world And I’m left wondering about the secret madness of that English teacher who’d ask me to eat cake when I expressed genuine concern… Well, my parents have passed on, as I said, and I’ve moved on as is plain and radiant to see to master idioms and vocabulary Punctuation, the catenative verb and Usage; and, as for that wooly-headed English teacher, I’m sure she’s moved on into a comfortable nuthouse where the staff makes her eat her cake, and make her think she can have it too - cos that’s what they do to nuts, and such instances (4) And now that I have got that off my chest, I can comfortably resume memorizing Volume 3 of theOxford Dictionary as  I perambulate and copy 100 entries from Fowler’s “Modern English Usage” as I victulate which is all part of my nightly ritual since she told me to do so some 50 years ago (cos I happened to look at her Union Jack knickers when she sat high on the table, and I stood up ***** cos that's what they made us do in the cinemas) - and that helps to put me into a state of dormancy, to hibernate till the sun ushers in a new day for me  – and a new cake for that wooly-headed English teacher, she, I can presume with certainty, elegantly reposed and superannuated Now, I’m glad I’ve got this off my chest and mastered my idioms and phrases and I can go eat my samosas
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Jun 28, 2013
Jun 28, 2013 at 8:21 AM UTC
My English teacher was wooly-headed
(1) There’s one thing I must get off my chest that’s bothered me now even 50 years on with the passage of time – my English teacher then she always told me when I grumbled homework was too difficult, she’d tell me: “That’s a piece of cake” And I’d go home discombobulated how anyone could eat paper or homework and she said this not once, but every time: “It’s a piece of cake” (2) And my parents and I looked at it every which way and from every point of view and concluded in our Perfect Ancient Native language: *“This English teacher is a loony. She is wooly-headed. She is the lamb Mary lost, silly and muddle-headed. How can homework be a piece of cake? Anyway, we don’t eat cake – we eat samosas.”* (3) And yet the English teacher would put her nose up in the air and remonstrate: “It’s a piece of cake!” Oh yeah, would you like tea with it? Now, my parents, bless their Ancient Souls, have gone on into the next world And I’m left wondering about the secret madness of that English teacher who’d ask me to eat cake when I expressed genuine concern… Well, my parents have passed on, as I said, and I’ve moved on as is plain and radiant to see to master idioms and vocabulary Punctuation, the catenative verb and Usage; and, as for that wooly-headed English teacher, I’m sure she’s moved on into a comfortable nuthouse where the staff makes her eat her cake, and make her think she can have it too - cos that’s what they do to nuts, and such instances (4) And now that I have got that off my chest, I can comfortably resume memorizing Volume 3 of theOxford Dictionary as  I perambulate and copy 100 entries from Fowler’s “Modern English Usage” as I victulate which is all part of my nightly ritual since she told me to do so some 50 years ago (cos I happened to look at her Union Jack knickers when she sat high on the table, and I stood up ***** cos that's what they made us do in the cinemas) - and that helps to put me into a state of dormancy, to hibernate till the sun ushers in a new day for me  – and a new cake for that wooly-headed English teacher, she, I can presume with certainty, elegantly reposed and superannuated Now, I’m glad I’ve got this off my chest and mastered my idioms and phrases and I can go eat my samosas
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63
The record player keeps spinning the Vinyl black & white pictures on the walls are beginning to talk And the lights blink on and off The same dark feeling of despair settles over me during the early hours of the morning It's a shame 'cause I've run out of whiskey to help chase the inspiration and sleep I desperately need My thoughts cross to you sometimes and I wonder where you are now I guess you never kept that promise as I've yet to see your name on a spine I guess I'll go to bed now I'll put on one more record and muddle into the fog These black & white pictures are beginning to talk And the lights blink On and off
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May 26, 2014
May 26, 2014 at 6:12 AM UTC
Dr. Feel Good
December 2005; January 2006, Summer that year.            2008 round the middle - no not the crash.           2009, yes the muddle. Tell me about how May 2010 was axed by December 2010. Palm, palm, date palm, ash cloud. February, April, August 2011 and that dreaded December. last grasp of the kite string, off goes the dreamed of high far far away the anchor moorings when transmission stopped, all white noise since then, empty prattle chatter of the key board, two millennia and counting thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, march, October, March! January 2016. A new landing.
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Jan 14, 2016
Jan 14, 2016 at 4:09 PM UTC
Last grasp of the kite string.
A man is only half of what he is; always leaning towards the dim Lacking a flouted need which whorls in the mute within him A man bigots an ideal and will lark it away at the hold of his routed pith A smile is not worthwhile if the smile does not have anything to receive or to give A man is skyless; bound to his back with his dreams fixed on a rapture He gorges upon tasteless feasts gasping for that sup he hungers to recapture He does not know nor recall the times that did once befall Of the lossless suffers and how they ever meant anything at all He will become the most that he can ever endeavour Be the creature he needs to be and whichever Way it may engross him and how it moulds or claims him It will be still him but leaning not so far in the dim He would be a whole man who would give himself wholly Who would be more and only more to her and her solely His full heart would be tendered for it would not be his own If it was still partial of the heart that had since budded and grown A man would be raised and the sky would be without border A bliss amid clouds where the undiscerning muddle finds order There would be a sense to the road an approach to the wander A reason for all a kiss a need to ponder no longer There would be such rise in his depth and a contest behind bit teeth To fight for the purposed kiss to hold her and keep her from grief To offer her all embrace not too tense and not too slack For her to breathe is to breathe; now half new he would never give it back To be back upon his back with eyes busy to the sky His bones broken as her feet glide indifferently by Over his stare among cloud where she impelled his descent He’d lay fallen and broken beaten and bent If Half a man became whole does a whole man not become naught? If he fights for a dearest never afore dreamt dream then what is left to be fought? Was it his minds misgivings that would lead to such a trite giving reliving to doubt? That surfaced more than he knew; the intended whisper instead a floundering shout? Would it have been his heart that threw him from his felicity? Could his relish overwhelm and mutate into potent toxicity? Could it be fact that without thought nor without tact he impelled her? Either overthought or over loved he would have fallen the hardest and he would not rise No he would not rise anymore If there ever was such a man and ever such a she He would have her for as long as that may be Her greatest gift is after saying all this to you Is that after knowing all that you could you would feel the same way too.
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Nov 7, 2012
Nov 7, 2012 at 3:21 PM UTC
A useless Man
A man is only half of what he is; always leaning towards the dim Lacking a flouted need which whorls in the mute within him A man bigots an ideal and will lark it away at the hold of his routed pith A smile is not worthwhile if the smile does not have anything to receive or to give A man is skyless; bound to his back with his dreams fixed on a rapture He gorges upon tasteless feasts gasping for that sup he hungers to recapture He does not know nor recall the times that did once befall Of the lossless suffers and how they ever meant anything at all He will become the most that he can ever endeavour Be the creature he needs to be and whichever Way it may engross him and how it moulds or claims him It will be still him but leaning not so far in the dim He would be a whole man who would give himself wholly Who would be more and only more to her and her solely His full heart would be tendered for it would not be his own If it was still partial of the heart that had since budded and grown A man would be raised and the sky would be without border A bliss amid clouds where the undiscerning muddle finds order There would be a sense to the road an approach to the wander A reason for all a kiss a need to ponder no longer There would be such rise in his depth and a contest behind bit teeth To fight for the purposed kiss to hold her and keep her from grief To offer her all embrace not too tense and not too slack For her to breathe is to breathe; now half new he would never give it back To be back upon his back with eyes busy to the sky His bones broken as her feet glide indifferently by Over his stare among cloud where she impelled his descent He’d lay fallen and broken beaten and bent If Half a man became whole does a whole man not become naught? If he fights for a dearest never afore dreamt dream then what is left to be fought? Was it his minds misgivings that would lead to such a trite giving reliving to doubt? That surfaced more than he knew; the intended whisper instead a floundering shout? Would it have been his heart that threw him from his felicity? Could his relish overwhelm and mutate into potent toxicity? Could it be fact that without thought nor without tact he impelled her? Either overthought or over loved he would have fallen the hardest and he would not rise No he would not rise anymore If there ever was such a man and ever such a she He would have her for as long as that may be Her greatest gift is after saying all this to you Is that after knowing all that you could you would feel the same way too.
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41
She's journeying they say; Journeying. They're too scared of the word To simply say 'dying' But it is all too clear. I'm sure she knows, Just us well as they, Even though her mind is such a muddle. She doesn't eat Or leave her bed And a machine outside her door pumps air into her lungs for her. When you try to talk to her You get lifeless eyes, As if she's already died But her body kept on breathing. Everyone can see it. They stop what they are doing To look into her room, But they never stay for long Even with all the curiosity in the world It's not something you really want to witness. The terribly slow fading of a life.
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May 29, 2014
May 29, 2014 at 2:05 AM UTC
Fading
In department store foyers, free samples sprayed, A collision of cosmetics muddle the air. The olfactory overpowered by such obvious odours, Why do natural notes disconcert you? Not the gym heavy sodden or overworked, Recognition of an individual, whilst eyes remain shut. Faint trace of the familiar or frenzied pheromones, A headiness misplaced by the cologne wearing clones Preference for the perfumed, the artificial sweetener. Marketed meticulously Musk manufactured yet not made by man Of flowers dear, of oils and compounds. Fresh, fruity, citrus or spiced Artificial aromas keep your own scent disguised Society simulates this sophistication of the senses, Masking yourself from me as you are wooed, Accustomed to this attraction, till you let down your defences How shall I know you when you are ****
0
Oct 30, 2012
Oct 30, 2012 at 6:10 PM UTC
“Would you like to try our new fragrance?!”
Waking up to hazy mornings. To the bitter cold days of Early Spring. I've never seen such a beautiful sunrise. Nine o' clock cigarettes during The morning rush. Saturday morning cigarettes That muddle my head. The chilly air mimics the smoke Spewing from my lips, Toxins sticking to my lungs Like glue. It's another day in Paradise. The dishes in the sink Pile up in mountains. Like the skyscraper laundry stack Overflowing in the hamper. Just another day in Paradise. The street lamps glisten as strings of pearls Their light reflecting off the silver glare of traffic barrels. The flowers have not arrived. The flowers have not bloomed, And the anxiety is killing me. Killing me like the coffee craving Pounding in my head. The flowers are missing, Hiding from the stinging cold Of early Spring. I've never seen such beautifully dismal skies. In the mild conversations about the weather, I tell them that it's never been better. In a way, it's never been. I walk down the battleground of sidewalk And tree roots, the slabs of concrete cracked and marred by Mother Nature's Will. Broken etchings of hopscotch Blur on the gritty surface, besides The rose bush peeking out through the Fence. They'll never fix these. Because it's another day in Paradise.
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Feb 21, 2015
Feb 21, 2015 at 10:10 PM UTC
Paradise
in the pit I'll visit tonight with her said the yellow ******* of cordial and skylight in Monserrat  she ought to treasure my Abacab with séance with her quilt of resilience that she'll muddle
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Jul 18, 2020
Jul 18, 2020 at 11:21 AM UTC
a blue daiquiri
Soft and firm, gentle and fierce, A parting breath smothers on skin. Wild and wanting, surrendered and stroking, Fingers are searching and home. Quiet, now listening, anticipating, wishing Until the spell breaks beneath lips - Blushing it comes, blooming it bursts Against symphonies and rhapsodies With melodies heaving, heavy, unheard. Gasping for life, holding more tight To another so fragile, human, finite Stealing, giving, alternately taking An appetite destructive, delicious, Desiring, raging; Flesh upon flesh, ragged, receiving. Twisting, bones resisting, A common ground with no space between Reaching and holding, pressing and pulling, Synchronized in silent sweet rhythms of time Warm, willing, fantasies thrilling, perspire Lovely and lucid, writhing, conducive As dancing flames to the fire. Thoughts are melting to muddle Into puddled pools of passion Dripping, swirling, flooding, licking The innermost walls of the cowering mind Bodies and hearts are pulsing, repeating, Beating and bruising, until each breath Is ****** divine.
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Mar 3, 2018
Mar 3, 2018 at 7:56 PM UTC
Eros
No, not short poems. honest to goodness short shorts, jean-like short shorts. No, not those kinds that the young girls wear, jean lookalike stretch fabric, skin so tight it makes their ole daddies' faces wince the same color blue. in the middle muddle of fall, now you write of short shorts? Well, I was told I could not write this till after the summer was final gone from the rear view mirror glass. Once I wrote/imagined about a woman of a certain age, who emptied her armoire drawers, time to transition and take things that could no longer be, to the thrift shop, for others to be thrifty in. Except for one bathing suit, a two piece back from the days, when two pieces meant you were proud of what you had and what you didn't have - the same suit she was wearing grabbing her little son, then a man of six or seven, (now a dad with a son, of three or six or seven), in the photo on the night table, some thirty dreams ago. Man you take a long time to make a point! what's all this got to do with short shorts? one summer day, a woman I know, an actual fire-breathing dragon, went thru the drawers of her ***** blonde armoire. there she "found" a pair of shorts shorts, from some thirty dreams ago. it did not take too much encouragement, just a little courage to try them on, thirty dreams later. now these short shorts were the old fashioned kind, they look liked cut off jeans but were not, they had rolled up cuffed bottoms to increase the illusion. They no longer fit! Yup. ******* short shorts were loose around that curvaceous waist, known as my favorite place., where I rested my head once again, after, we celebrated. that is my poem about short shorts that I've been carrying round until the curfew was lifted. but even tho I like short shorts, I'll never ask someone to wear them, risking scorn and mockery, but I know for a fact, those short shorts did not get thrown out.
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Nov 11, 2013
Nov 11, 2013 at 8:10 AM UTC
Short Shorts
No, not short poems. honest to goodness short shorts, jean-like short shorts. No, not those kinds that the young girls wear, jean lookalike stretch fabric, skin so tight it makes their ole daddies' faces wince the same color blue. in the middle muddle of fall, now you write of short shorts? Well, I was told I could not write this till after the summer was final gone from the rear view mirror glass. Once I wrote/imagined about a woman of a certain age, who emptied her armoire drawers, time to transition and take things that could no longer be, to the thrift shop, for others to be thrifty in. Except for one bathing suit, a two piece back from the days, when two pieces meant you were proud of what you had and what you didn't have - the same suit she was wearing grabbing her little son, then a man of six or seven, (now a dad with a son, of three or six or seven), in the photo on the night table, some thirty dreams ago. Man you take a long time to make a point! what's all this got to do with short shorts? one summer day, a woman I know, an actual fire-breathing dragon, went thru the drawers of her ***** blonde armoire. there she "found" a pair of shorts shorts, from some thirty dreams ago. it did not take too much encouragement, just a little courage to try them on, thirty dreams later. now these short shorts were the old fashioned kind, they look liked cut off jeans but were not, they had rolled up cuffed bottoms to increase the illusion. They no longer fit! Yup. ******* short shorts were loose around that curvaceous waist, known as my favorite place., where I rested my head once again, after, we celebrated. that is my poem about short shorts that I've been carrying round until the curfew was lifted. but even tho I like short shorts, I'll never ask someone to wear them, risking scorn and mockery, but I know for a fact, those short shorts did not get thrown out.
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77
I feel surrounded by countless fears The world for me has nothing but hate It's getting harder and harder to hold back the tears For I have an infamous tendency to be late And that's just how they would phrase it too So holier-than-thou with their watches In this world swiftly turned to zoo Time is king and we are just the notches My teacher felt the urge to inform me today That I am late in every way Late in my work, late in my location Late in choosing my perfect vocation And even if you try your hardest Treat your task as a craft If you were there the latest Everyone will view you as daft Well from now on I will try hard to be on time I'll cut the corners and muddle through the grime This problem brings me so much shame And my peers always choose my head to blame But never assume that I don't care Do not believe I enjoy this flaw For like all the great singers and witty writers rare My punctuality will someday leave the world in awe
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Mar 29, 2012
Mar 29, 2012 at 4:00 PM UTC
Late
In moments of raging to the hospital, the jolts from the road, the squeal of the tires, and the tripping of your feet only multiply your anxiety. Delicacy is suspended amply in the air, hanging daintily on the thread of life and death. Delicacy is the soft and inconsistent beeping from the cardiac monitor. It controls your thoughts; yet is only a shadow on your radar. It shares the rhythm of the pounding in your head, and the thumping in your chest. You strain to shut everything out, leaving only the shy quiver of breathe slithering out from their lax lips. Their lips tremor under the reign of some foreign enemy, and their eyes flutter from an unseen truth. It is the suffering you wish to unburden them from, the pain you would inflict upon yourself in return for both their lives intact. Delicacy is a light fragrance, a mixture of disinfectant and sweat. Is it the scent of creating a life, or the imminent end of it? Beads of perspiration stream down your face and sting your eyes. The sweet caress of silk treads faintly underneath your fingertips. You rub the back of her hand, clammy and fragile. Rubbing the skin, you forget who the comfort is more for while footsteps pierce the stillness in the air. A figure dawned in white appears before you. Their form blurs in and out of focus, their voice a toneless muddle seeping through your cloud of stupor. Delicacy is a whisper flashing goosebumps across your skin, "We can only save one of them." It is the realization that too much pressure, and two months premature, is a cocktail dyed with poison. She looks to you with eyes of understanding and acceptance. Delicacy is the collapsing of all you know. It is the berating of incoherent words tumbling from your lips for the pure sake of escaping. You're swiftly taken from the room, kicking and screaming to the hallway. The unsettling tick of the clock mocks your every fiber. You **** the void of silence with the tapping of your foot, taming yourself from barging your way into the room. With the screaming from the bed, the instinct of protection, the stiffening of your back, the nurse quickly ushers you back in. The soft and consistent rising of the baby's chest is surrounded with the light fragrance of life. The plush fibers of the yellow blanket tug on the skin of your fingertips. The fascination apparent in your eyes, look to her while wondering how this little body will have the biggest impact on your life. Delicacy is the soft whisper flashing goosebumps across your skin, "We made it."
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Jul 21, 2013
Jul 21, 2013 at 1:19 PM UTC
Delicate Friction
In moments of raging to the hospital, the jolts from the road, the squeal of the tires, and the tripping of your feet only multiply your anxiety. Delicacy is suspended amply in the air, hanging daintily on the thread of life and death. Delicacy is the soft and inconsistent beeping from the cardiac monitor. It controls your thoughts; yet is only a shadow on your radar. It shares the rhythm of the pounding in your head, and the thumping in your chest. You strain to shut everything out, leaving only the shy quiver of breathe slithering out from their lax lips. Their lips tremor under the reign of some foreign enemy, and their eyes flutter from an unseen truth. It is the suffering you wish to unburden them from, the pain you would inflict upon yourself in return for both their lives intact. Delicacy is a light fragrance, a mixture of disinfectant and sweat. Is it the scent of creating a life, or the imminent end of it? Beads of perspiration stream down your face and sting your eyes. The sweet caress of silk treads faintly underneath your fingertips. You rub the back of her hand, clammy and fragile. Rubbing the skin, you forget who the comfort is more for while footsteps pierce the stillness in the air. A figure dawned in white appears before you. Their form blurs in and out of focus, their voice a toneless muddle seeping through your cloud of stupor. Delicacy is a whisper flashing goosebumps across your skin, "We can only save one of them." It is the realization that too much pressure, and two months premature, is a cocktail dyed with poison. She looks to you with eyes of understanding and acceptance. Delicacy is the collapsing of all you know. It is the berating of incoherent words tumbling from your lips for the pure sake of escaping. You're swiftly taken from the room, kicking and screaming to the hallway. The unsettling tick of the clock mocks your every fiber. You **** the void of silence with the tapping of your foot, taming yourself from barging your way into the room. With the screaming from the bed, the instinct of protection, the stiffening of your back, the nurse quickly ushers you back in. The soft and consistent rising of the baby's chest is surrounded with the light fragrance of life. The plush fibers of the yellow blanket tug on the skin of your fingertips. The fascination apparent in your eyes, look to her while wondering how this little body will have the biggest impact on your life. Delicacy is the soft whisper flashing goosebumps across your skin, "We made it."
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8
I thrive upon it, And yet, it thrives upon me; Grey muddle of life.
0
May 8, 2014
May 8, 2014 at 9:35 AM UTC
10. Grey
“Sir, this mole seems to be growing and spreading” Suhail stopped the scissor and comb, and said “It’s a bit grown than last month and even then, I noticed it spreading” Suhail is my hair stylist for the last about six years I have seen him growing from a Hair Analyst to Specialist to Senior Hair Specialist There is something more than the generous tip that connects us May be my willingness to abide by his experiments with my hair Or reciprocation of loyalty that bound us every month Surprised, I asked him, “What mole are you talking about?” “Don’t you know the black mole on the back side of your left ear” puzzled Suhail “You go and check with Madam, may be its my feeling only” “How would madam know about it Suhail, she doesn’t cut my hair!” “Arre Sir, you too!” Suhail had a vicious smile on his face “Come on tell me” I prodded him with the same viciousness We got into wayward pastime … “Arre, Sir, they get to see it… When you lay down on her lap in those afternoons And she combs your hair with her fingers And when you fall into that muddle of sleepiness and excitement Her eyes would lock it” “Arre, Sir, they get to see it… When she comes from the back as on paws of a cat Hugs and hold you tight with her hands And press her face on your shoulder Her eyes would lock it” “Arre, Sir, they get to see it… When those drenched lips move away from your lips And the craving teeth leave a hickey on that earlobe, Her eyes would lock it” Suhail finished the haircut and I left tipping him as usual The drive back home searched through the labyrinths of memories Of caressing fingers, tight hugs and hickeys Why didn’t she mention that mole, ever? “Honey, you never told about that Mole, Come on, let me see and let’s go to a Dermatologist quickly We can’t take these things lightly; the doctor may even suggest a biopsy Biopsy is fully covered in your mediclaim, isn’t it?”
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Sep 1, 2017
Sep 1, 2017 at 11:31 AM UTC
That Black Mole on the back of my Earlobe
“Sir, this mole seems to be growing and spreading” Suhail stopped the scissor and comb, and said “It’s a bit grown than last month and even then, I noticed it spreading” Suhail is my hair stylist for the last about six years I have seen him growing from a Hair Analyst to Specialist to Senior Hair Specialist There is something more than the generous tip that connects us May be my willingness to abide by his experiments with my hair Or reciprocation of loyalty that bound us every month Surprised, I asked him, “What mole are you talking about?” “Don’t you know the black mole on the back side of your left ear” puzzled Suhail “You go and check with Madam, may be its my feeling only” “How would madam know about it Suhail, she doesn’t cut my hair!” “Arre Sir, you too!” Suhail had a vicious smile on his face “Come on tell me” I prodded him with the same viciousness We got into wayward pastime … “Arre, Sir, they get to see it… When you lay down on her lap in those afternoons And she combs your hair with her fingers And when you fall into that muddle of sleepiness and excitement Her eyes would lock it” “Arre, Sir, they get to see it… When she comes from the back as on paws of a cat Hugs and hold you tight with her hands And press her face on your shoulder Her eyes would lock it” “Arre, Sir, they get to see it… When those drenched lips move away from your lips And the craving teeth leave a hickey on that earlobe, Her eyes would lock it” Suhail finished the haircut and I left tipping him as usual The drive back home searched through the labyrinths of memories Of caressing fingers, tight hugs and hickeys Why didn’t she mention that mole, ever? “Honey, you never told about that Mole, Come on, let me see and let’s go to a Dermatologist quickly We can’t take these things lightly; the doctor may even suggest a biopsy Biopsy is fully covered in your mediclaim, isn’t it?”
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you see, well rather ironically you dont... or at least i dont (...my mistake) (that was my perception/projection of "you" based on "me" because we (again sorry or/ sorry again) can only see the world egocentrically) i lost my glasses last week havent seemed keen on finding them on the streets of O, (Oh) (OH) how i keened after them (IO) driving on a mirror this morning, mourning, before the sun, a rose, arose. i finally noticed them gone. the acid lined upper middle class road from my (socially speaking) lower class acid ridden (economically speaking) upper middle class mind had dis(re)appeared^(infinity) all time was lost and for the first time in my driving career i found myself, spending more time looking at the street than at the road shooting stars of red streamed after taillights as if always trying to catch up   greens joined in from lights above ...but did not muddle the stars   like the perfectly controlled watercolor artisan what Virtuoso, what Perfectionist, what Letter-dash-letter of a being could create such an immaculate emasculating picture (lack of question mark) i am humbled. p.s i gave up looking for my glasses my vision seemed perfectly clear so was yours (Sorry)
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Dec 16, 2014
Dec 16, 2014 at 11:00 AM UTC
Watercolor 6:46 am
Back to counting the hours until I get to go home. Back to awkward encounters with strangers I know. Back to wearing my earphones in tense public spaces. Back to standing alone in a sea of the faceless. Back to socially inept, standing in corners, intense introversion and wishing it was over. Back to hiding my flaws, my quirks and my oddities-- not talking too much because I say all the wrong things. It's back to the grind, and I'll muddle through because at least when it's over I'll be home with you.
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Aug 22, 2015
Aug 22, 2015 at 12:14 AM UTC
Back to the Grind
going down this long lost road traveling under the waning moon thinking upon memories of old I feel my impending doom we are pilgrims in the age of fire we are gods.. truth we aspire voyaging deserted corridors painted in cast iron blood a great spectacle of gore like nothing you could think of elaborate scheme between hunter and pray scrambling the mind and left in disarray
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Nov 20, 2015
Nov 20, 2015 at 4:33 AM UTC
Muddle