12 o'clock
never seems to stop
I threw a rock
at the grandfather clock
but the tick tock
doesn't stop

What Is this?
I didn't even say goodbye
I never wanted you to leave
I never wanted to let go
but you'll live on in memor**y

One month
and many thousands of words
and yet.

My feelings are not 100%
and my head is messier
than I thought it could get.

but I'm happy with writing
these words for you;
some are ****
but some are good too.
And I'm happy because of
all the tallented people I've met.

What did you do to the UK?

Why did lessen the worth of the pound today?

Where do you want us to go? There's no escape.

Who let UKIP have their way?

When did maths become a political debate?

Why did the 24th June 2016 become UK independence day?

6 hours until school
4am and I'll be there
But Wimbledon sounds cool
So I don't really care.

6 hours in a vehicle
4 probably sleeping
It should be feasible
As long as my friends aren't beefing.

Again.

Sun is shining
upon the city view
water running under ground
sat on the rock I found
on a dead end road
the remains of a school
shattered glass on the floor
worn out road markings
softly birds tweeting
and a stray ginger cat
all this found
in an abandoned part of town

We've got to the point where people are accepting peoples differences.
However, are yet to get to the stage where those who accept will support aswell.

Two days of school missed
I can't catchup on Spanish
my homework, I just can't do it
there's too many words for my head to fit
'food' was covered in year 7 and it's year 10 now
I don't remember any vocab, I don't know how
I guess the blanks, they're probably wrong
my knowledge of food and drink in Spanish is not so strong
I pick up my pen and try not to cheat
(use Google translate for help) although the translation's in the sheet
and I want to go to sleep
and wake up the beginning of next week (more like tomorrow or Monday morning)
I'll copy my friends they're in the same class
I'll get a few wrong it's not like there's anything to pass
or I could tell my teacher I don't understand much and stay behind after school
but I don't have time for that and it doesn't sound all that cool
she said I might not get it all 'do as much as you can'
so maybe I wouldn't have to stay behind if I said 'I don't understand'
It's only homework I can catch up on what I missed
but it's kinda difficult when I barely know Spanish

She was the queen of helplessness; she had just been crowned.

All words are spoken
written words are there to be said
all words are spoken
even words of the long since dead
All words are spoken
even the ones in your head

There is comfort in being alone
your thoughts surround you
they become your home
you can remember those you lost
and those you want to meet
those you haven't seen in a while
those who make you want to smile
you can reflect on life
and whether a decision you made was wise
or you could think of the things you want to do
because you're the only one there to stop you

I'm alone but not alone.
There are so many people to talk to
But I'm sat here on my own
In the dark with no where to go.
In my home
But no one will know.
Or no one will care
it's not like I'm doing anything
It's not like I can share
it with anyone, no one is listening.
The loneliness I have to bare
but talking doesn't take away the fact I'm just existing.

I want you back
the feeling you give me.
I want you
to run right through me.
You give me something,
a feeling inside.
You make all the numbness
run and hide.
You change something
when you're around,
when we're alone
you sing your sound.
You seem to care
and are always there.
Happiness leaves, emptiness as well
but you are there. Constant. Eternal.

I am an alter ego
just a part of someone bigger.
The part that has a voice,
some sort of confidence.
The part that makes no noise,
and that isn't conscious.
I am an alter ego;
I takeover when it's right for me.
I will never be seen,
if you see the greater me.

You pick and choose your way through life
until the day you met your wife
your eyes fell in love
and that was enough
for a while
whilst you still had a smile
but you were waiting for the day
when you could finally say
you were only trying to cause a stir
and you didn't really love her
she was your wife
she was your darling
in love all your life
but when you turned your back you were snarling

True friends don't stab you in the front.

They punch you in the face and knee you in the solar plexus.

But that wouldn't fit in the song.

Anger spinning in my head
*******
*******
you heard what I said

anger spinning in my head
leave me alone
you heard what I said

anger spinning in my head
the consequences that I dread

anger spinning in my head

nothing flows
the anger controls
hitting the walls
so no one else falls

silence a friend
time together we spend
anger the enemy
part of identity

so I am alone
with my friend and foe
sometimes I hate both
and they hurt just as much

the voice of an angel
pitch perfect
powerful words
spreading the message
without aggression
death unspoken
sadness possesses
your innocent look
taken to spread a message of love
for those who were treated unjust
warriors created through your eyes
warriors made when you hear their cries
their storied told through your softly sung words
and the bars you composed

I live trying to not
exhaust myself by
keeping up. But trying
not to fall behind
as that can be just as bad.
Just sticking
to the middle and
remaining there.
Average. Inbetween
the top
and the bottom.
Unseen and overlooked.

When I leave this world
And go back to reality
I'm faced with the same
overwhelming wave of anxiety
too afraid for people to know me
too sacred to let people see
but everyday I go back
and everyday is the same
I have this barrier
you may know it as shame
I'm not shameful of myself
but feel shame for the ignorant-minded people
who surround me
in this shell
protecting me from being me

Sometimes bad days come and pass
Most of the time they seem to last

A bad day starts when another bad day ends.

Battle to the death
No one dies
Battle of strength
Skill
And mind

"Be anything" they say
how can we when we are forced to decide at the age of 13 and change our mind.

Everyone is beautiful in their own individual way
Whether it's the power to be heard with what you say
Or the strength you show when you do not say

Don't give me anything
because it's human nature to want more.
Leave me to live my life
and see how high I soar.

I don't want your pitty,
I can do it on my own.
leave me to live my life
you've seen how far I've already grown.

I wish my life was black and white
but it's full of vibrant colours
I wish I could be open
but my feelings are bottled up
I wish I could swim
but at the moment I sink
I wish I could be free
but I'm stuck in a cage
I wish it was just me
so I didn't have to worry about what people will think
I wish life was simple
but it's beyond my understanding

Black is the absence of light
Not the absence of human rights.

There's black and white and all the colours in between
Red, Blue, Orange, Green
but grey is the only one I've ever seen

Walk blindfolded through the city
to not see is a pity
unable to see the light
on this beautiful night
as we reach the mirror pool
judgement passed
like we're crazy

We take off our socks and shoes
as people exchange their views
Through looks and glances
we take our chances
and continue to run through the fountain
as the night become later
and later

numbness felt in our toes
as the unheated water shows
what it can really do
we put on our shoe
the the other
feet still wet
From the water as we leave
maybe something different next week.

I put my thoughts in a bottle
those I don't say
but one day the bottle will be shaken
and it will explode from the pressure
I can't wait for that day

Limitations  hinder our chances of doing what we really want so why do we keep setting boundaries?

Bright lights
brighter in the night
fill the streets
while people sleep
and daytime crowds are gone
am I the only one
to see this city as pretty
when everyone else seems to see it as ******

Bruises that weren't there before.
You fell? Ok, sure?
They beat you up again
don't deny it's always the same.
There is no end to their game;
they beat you up, beat you up and
beat you up again.
Bruises that weren't there before.
If you don't admit it, I can't help you anymore.

You are my caffeine
You make my heart race
You make me act kinda crazy
But I like the feeling from a caffeine kick
When your not there
My mood is low
My heart is slow
And all I want is something that makes me feel the same.
Even though I'm not addicted to you like I am caffeine
I still feel the same when you're not there.

Camera man
not a fan
rode with them in their van
living life without a plan
he started his journey back in jan
he didn't know how long it would span
he wasn't a fan
he was just the camera man

I need to stop being so abstract
No one understands what I am trying to say
I need to stop camouflaging my words
because the message is interpreted in a different way
I need to stop disguising my thoughts with a mask
and say what I ment to say
I need to stop shielding myself
from people who I know will hate
I need to be free
but every time I try my words get caught up and the message starts to hide
and the only thing that gets lost is another part of me
but no one sees that because it's hidden on the inside

The last two days have been hard
I failed again
to tell you who I am

The third time now
I don't want this
I want to tell you

but no matter how hard I try
it's only camoflaged words
that come out of me

and you don't see the message