Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
self evident not ambiguous
this is mayonnaise not ranch
ask yourself, who left their pickles on the side of the road?
self evident not ambiguous
like a beautifully curated manequin
blessed to touch the sky with breath
if plaster lungs could speak
may it sound of you
cold and hallow
brittle and factual
cursing those deemed inadequate to immaculate taste
alexander mcqueen
this is mayonnaise not ranch
self evident not ambiguous
two mannequins
one large vase to catch the rain
to spill in the bayou
clouded yet shallow
brutal and factual
alexander mcqueen
#uk
Robert Ippaso May 2023
About time,
I've paid my dues I've crossed the line,
This moment I thought would never come,
Is in my grasp, the deed now done.

Don't get me wrong, I loved my Mum,
But all that passed would surely stun
Even a saint or the Lord above,
So tiring being an aimless dove.

Now I'm ready to take the world by storm,
Show them my worth, no longer act forlorn,
The wife I always wanted by my side,
I can finally get into my Kingly stride.

The Little ****** that remains,
Harry's willful character that pains,
I've summoned experts to hear what they might say
To finally obtain a sample of his mysterious DNA.

I'm not claiming he's not mine,
But as Americans would shout, ‘I wouldn't bet a dime’,
Thank goodness I've got my other boy,
A stand-up chap that brings me nothing but pure joy.

As to Camilla, my soulmate from the start,
From whom they never could tear me far apart,
She now stands by me as my Queen,
You saw me beam with joy like a lovestruck teen.

Don't get me wrong,
I'm painfully aware my reign may not be long,
But while I'm here, I plan to make my mark,
Understanding this job is no cakewalk in the park.

I've got the Aussies wanting to jump ship.
The Canadians on their own perennial trip,
The Scots plotting for a Clansman King,
And Parliament seeking me do next to nothing.

Yet I've got a plan,
Something that will surely stun,
Become a multimedia star,
And thus take them all across the bar.

I can jig, dance and sing,
Fly helicopters, do pretty much of anything,
Plant trees, help save our World
How can all of this be thought absurd.

Politicians just blow smoke,
Send their countries near flat broke,
I instead bring Billions in
Collecting smiles from wheresoever I have been.

That said let me enjoy my moment in the sun,
Reflecting on all that's been and done,
My resolve is firm, my duty clear,
My life's work is aimed at all, both far and near.

So rest easy, enjoy the ride,
Sailing smoothly on a flowing tide,
Over a thousand years in the making
My oath is one of giving and not taking.
Simon Piesse Sep 2022
We thank you for our Queen,
For all that she has been!
By generations seen
As steadfast and serene.

Strong champion of the Arts,
She played so many parts,
Although our mourning starts,
She’ll live on in our hearts.

She counselled countless politicians,
Showed a loving disposition,
‘Service not self’ remained her position,
The Christian faith, her life-long mission.

She walked with the rich;
She talked with the poor;
She re-formed a nation
Broken by war.

Her Christmas messages
And kaleidoscopic dresses
Gave us hope,
Took away our distresses.

Above all, though she led our nation
She stayed down to earth, our special relation.
Now her train has left our station
We offer our humble adulation.

We thank you for our Queen,
For all that she has been!
By generations seen
As steadfast and serene.
ju Sep 2022
white
black

blue

lifeline
noose
Northern Poet Jan 2022
London is dead
And the streets are on fire
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar

He's had one too many chips
And stuck his hands in the fryer
Cheese, wine and BYOB
But a party wasn't his desire
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar

A Tory boy at heart
Doesn't know the cost of bread
...For a start
Lying has become
His favourite art
Funds his chums with millions
They only eat a le carte
While the working class struggle
On a horse and cart
Outside Downing Street
You can hear the choir
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar

Full of lies and deceit
Tory voters should have kept a receipt
In the House of Commons
How the **** does this man have a seat?
A once proud nation
Now knocked off our feet
In Trafalgar Square
You can hear the Town Crier
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar

Higher income tax
And VAT
No money back
No guarantee
Trying to get rid of the BBC
The Tories even had to apologise
To the ******* Queen
This situation is beyond belief
The screams are getting higher and higher
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar

No respect for the NHS
This country's in a ******* mess
Ran by monkeys
Who can't even dress
Led by a *****
Who we all deteste
It's time for this muppet to retire
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar

Brexit was his plan
And Grenfell was neglected  
The pandemic sent this place
******* hectic
Someone please get this clown ejected
London's burning
And the city's on fire
Boris Johnson
Is a ******* liar
Northern Poet Jan 2022
We've all got the same 24 hours in a day
So you should use them in a better way
And become an influencer
Like Molly Mae

It doesn't matter what your class
Or your privilege
Just get a job
On six-figure digits
So become an influencer
Like Molly Mae

Find yourself a spot on prime time TV
Where brands and sponsors come your way for free
Isn't this what life's meant to be?
So become an influencer
Like Molly Mae

Million dollar contracts
Stacks of television contacts
Instagram your life for maximum impact
Posing in Dubai to keep your career intact
So become an influencer
Like Molly Mae

Pay your factory workers less than minimum wage
Watch them graft away 12 hour days
Claim you worked your **** off to get where you are today
And become an influencer
Like Molly Mae
CK Baker Sep 2021
Well we jumped on the wing
for a good Irish fling
kicked off the week
with a boiler

The banter was high
as we took to the sky
nothing in sight
was a spoiler

And the red eye at night
was a captain’s delight
we spread on the seat
of the liner

Arrived just in time
for a whale of a time
at the Temple Bar
and Diner

Well the Dublin scene
in the Old College Green
was wired and alive
on the corner

Where me and me' mates
paired in at the gates
there were welcoming arms
to us foreigners

And we sang through the night
and grinned in delight
with banjos, pipes
and lasses

Drinking whiskey and beer
in a boatload of cheer
the rooster got lost
in the masses

The **** in the walk
was out on the stalk
a wee little flute
on display

His shoulders were pinned
with a great big grin
they were such
peculiar ways!

Well we found em next day
(in a sauntering way)
got tossed in
all the commotion


What happened to you?
said he hadn’t a clue
or any
baldy notion!

Hit the road to Howth
little east, little south
the seaside town
was groovin

Found the Cobblestone Pub
for a jar and a scrub
the seabird sounds
were soothin

Then we jumped a train
in the lashing rain
the Belfast craic
was mighty

Hit the Thirsty Goat
with a parching throat
some Tullamore Dew
for a nighty

In the Crumlin jail
the spirits set sail
the IRA
was gaffin

There was Bobby Sands
in celestial lands
alive and proud
and laughin

The Griffin dance
was the final chance
the evening closed
in nigh

And we made our way
through the Chelsea lanes
to say our
final good bye

~ ~ ~ ~

Singing
Ay, oh…let it all go
safe haven in the wasteland!

Singing
Slainte’…take me away
to the old Irish sounds
of the band!
Jordan LC Murphy Jul 2021
•••
Torture and punish me with purposeful bad dentistry, Tell me I’m stupid but you teach me nothing. Brake my un-nourished bones through no fault of my own and offer no physio no help nope nothing...
You bully with taxes and your public servants too,
Inflations a load of ******, climate change, the nhs too, Why do I pay my taxes when prisons just a rent free room?
I suggest you retract your bailiffs before they actually meet my mood
Theyll end up in a puddle of **** and blood crying on the floor
Struggling to survive I feel I can barely breath but Im okay your honour............... I’m living the great ******* british dream
•••
Anyone Else?
Dr aminu Jul 2021
voodoo revenge DEATH SPELLS & witchcraft REVENGE SPELLS. Discipline someone with voodoo revenge spells. Get rid of enemies & regain confidence using
voodoo revenge spells by contacting DR AMINU Voodoo Revenge Spells
Cast a voodoo revenge spell on someone who is abusive or has a wrong on you. Regain the respect of the community & the people whose opinion matters to you with voodoo revenge spells
Financial Disaster Revenge Spells
Voodoo financial disaster revenge spells to hurt someone financial causing them to lose money, get fired from their job or experience financial
disaster Revenge Curses Spells Cause someone to suffer in one way or another using revenge curses. Let misery & suffering befall your enemies using revenge spells Spells To Break A Curse­ Break a curse using these powerful voodoo spells. Reverse a curse, remove a curse or cancel a jinx using powerful black magic voodoo spells
Call/Whatsapp:+2347037650619
Email:draminu7demon@gmail.com
voodoo revenge DEATH SPELLS & witchcraft REVENGE SPELLS. Discipline someone with voodoo revenge spells. Get rid of enemies & regain confidence using
voodoo revenge spells by contacting DR AMINU Voodoo Revenge Spells
Cast a voodoo revenge spell on someone who is abusive or has a wrong on you. Regain the respect of the community & the people whose opinion matters to you with voodoo revenge spells
Financial Disaster Revenge Spells
Voodoo financial disaster revenge spells to hurt someone financial causing them to lose money, get fired from their job or experience financial
disaster Revenge Curses Spells Cause someone to suffer in one way or another using revenge curses. Let misery & suffering befall your enemies using revenge spells Spells To Break A Curse­ Break a curse using these powerful voodoo spells. Reverse a curse, remove a curse or cancel a jinx using powerful black magic voodoo spells
Call/Whatsapp:+2347037650619
Email:draminu7demon@gmail.com
Robyn Lewis Mar 2021
The outside is off limits and a doorstep becomes a dais,
To show frustration and sympathy,
To light a candle, to mourn
To stand with others when we cannot touch them.

The world is in chaos and the doorstep is a sanctuary,
To appreciate and commemorate,
To clap and laud,
Yet people are not paid in applause.

The doorstep is a safe space, but it is not a powerful one.
Isolated, a single tealight in the night,
No change is affected through a clap in the dark.
The doorstep is where the buck stops.

Another candle makes our streets no safer,
As women and flowers are trampled,
Pinned to the ground by the colleagues of a murderer.

A banging pan pays no person’s food bill,
As you judge your neighbours for their lack of civic pride,
Smug that you do your bit,
While you vote for those who have forced nurses to foodbanks.

A doorstep is as far as you go to remember loved ones,
Whose funerals you could not attend,
Whose deathbed you were absent from.
A doorstep where you miss them and ponder
Who is responsible for their death.
Is your doorstep where the buck stops?
Next page