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Bailey Jun 2016
His strong hands gripped me everywhere, he knew my sensitive places.
My eyes shone due to my intense obedience and humiliation.
I started to perspire in an excitable way.
My legs began to shake.
I could feel his affection through his endless kiss.
I felt intimidated.
He loved me.

I can still feel his indomitable hands around me, he knows my vulnerable spots.
My eyes glisten from my potent passiveness and embarrassment.
I break out in nervous sweats.
My legs are trembling.
I can feel his devotion in an infinite smack.
I feel terrorized.
He's attached to me.
5.9k · Mar 2016
Life Is Like A Lollipop
Bailey Mar 2016
Life is like a lollipop. It’s sweet and sour. But not many know, that they have the power. You choose whether you bite before the center, you choose what flavor. But the truth is, your life's gonna **** if you don't plan to savor. So unwrap life slowly, and enjoy its taste. Before you know it you've swallowed and it’s already too late.
5.6k · Apr 2016
I Want To Kiss You
Bailey Apr 2016
I want to kiss you.
It sometimes physically hurts not to kiss you.
I don't want to look into your eyes,
because I don't want to see the confusion in them.
I don't want to explain myself.
I just want to feel your breathing on my face as
my lips fit onto yours.
I want to slip my thumb
under the line of your jaw,
and tip your head back,
to expose your beautiful, long neck.
I want to run the tip of my nose along it
and to hear nothing but our breathing.
Sometimes I look at that face and
it's like I've been hypnotized,
my greatest desires want to come out.
I want to kiss you sweet god in another life
I would kiss you.
And then afterward,
press a soft hand to your lovely head
and wash the memory from it.
Bailey May 2016
Our Father, which art now on Earth, I am here today to introduce you to one of the most faultless ideas that Man has ever come up with: Public High School. I will be your personal tour guide while you experience the magic of learning just as any other student would.
To start your day, you’ll wake up at five in the morning (due to the start times that are framed and super-glued to the walls of the District Office). You should spend most of your time trying to look presentable for your schoolmates. If you’re late and forget to do something, it’s easily fixable. For instance, if you can’t find the time within those two hours to brush your teeth--no problem! Just ask every living soul and their mother if they have any gum.
When you get on the bus, choose a seat in the middle. That way you don’t risk inhaling the tobacco in the back or a friendly conversation with the bus driver. If you see a friend, talk to them really loudly and excitedly, but not next to them! Always in the seat across from them (so the other kids have to sit next to strangers).
At school, we’ll weave through the teenage islands in the hallways and walk to first period. Make sure your first period is an easy subject, because at seven a.m., you’re lucky to get the date correct.
Down this hallway we see some testosterone pumped scholars congratulating each other on which estrogen-laced student they managed to have ******* with. To the left of them you’ll notice a shunned pregnant girl. Don’t talk to her. You should always remember that in high school, it is disgraceful to reproduce after having ***, never mind what the mandatory health classes say.
We finally get to first period to sit down in our graffitied, gum littered seat, and open the textbook---whereon the most heterosexual boys have educated us on the male anatomy. Your teacher is Mr. Anderson, whom all of the children hate because of his politically incorrect and harsh comments. I realize that you created him but really, don’t try to have him fired; he’s got a tenure hanging above his head.
After three classes of lectures and forbidden whispers, it’s mid morning and lunchtime. You’re lucky you own all of the food on your green Earth because if not, you’d have to choose from five different freezer-burned, reheated dishes. Time to scrutinize your identity and decide where to sit. You’re not even a being... well the floor isn’t so bad.
After six hours of violently trying to hang on to the Quadratic Formula, and not Grace's new relationship status, you can get back onto the thoughtfully engineered school bus and involuntarily listen to the sins of the weekend before, until you get home.
Thank you for visiting a little piece of heaven on earth. You’re one day closer to college!
satire is the best
3.0k · Jun 2016
You Know What I Mean
Bailey Jun 2016
Shoe fries, JoJos
Scalloped potatoes, Mashed potatoes
Baked potatoes, Hashbrowns, Tatertots
Latkas, Potato soup, French fries, Home fries
Diced potatoes, Potato chips, Curly fries
Potato pies, Riced potatoes, Spudnuts
Potato salad, Poutine
2.7k · May 2016
Death
Bailey May 2016
I think it's
walking through a closed door
that was always open
one of my good days
2.6k · Apr 2016
The "We" Generation (speech)
Bailey Apr 2016
I can still see it. I am twelve years old looking at my mom lay in her hospital bed. They told me she had a hole in her esophagus, and not too long ago, had been dying of blood loss. I stand still too shocked to cry, and in my trance I hear the hum of the t.v. behind me. And I know that if I flip through the channels right now I’ll land on a commercial depicting false paradise. Toned, tanned, pretty people on a beach smiling like they were in Heaven as they swallow down the drink that put my mom and my family through hell.

I am a biased person. This tragedy that I have gone through has made me biased about all subjects relating alcohol. If I were to have one wish, it would be to expel the very idea of alcohol from our heads. But I can’t do that, just as I can’t let my opinions cloud my vision for the future of the families of America. In this simple vision, alcohol advertising is banned from television and radio.

Researchers found that an average of 29 percent of alcohol TV ads in Houston, Los Angeles, Dallas, Atlanta and Chicago don’t abide by voluntary standards set by the industry, which involve not being shown during t.v. shows where at most 30 percent of the audience are kids. One out of eleven radio ads for alcoholic beverages in 75 markets across the nation in 2009 failed to comply with the alcohol industry’s voluntary standard for the placement of advertising.

Alcohol advertisements aren’t the only type of ads that violate our industry’s standards. We see it all the time, when some sketchy commercial on t.v. has microscopic words at the bottom or a radio ad has the bad information sped up quicker than our ears can catch.

I believe that alcohol shouldn’t be prohibited, because I believe that people are born with the right to choose what they want to do with their life. But with that in mind, let’s let them choose! No more brainwashing commercials that promise a good time, let us decide what we need in order to have a good time.

Maybe then there wouldn’t be 30 percent of American adults and one in five teenagers living with alcoholism, 6.6 million children living with alcoholic parents and tens of thousands of alcohol induced car crashes. I believe that this will change. But I don’t just believe for those numbers I said. Thirty, five, one, 6.6 million--what do numbers mean? Nothing.

I believe for the kid who thinks drinking might solve her problems. For the other kid who wants heaven, but doesn’t want to get there too quickly. I believe for the little boy who has to take care of his siblings because his father is a drunk and his mother works hard. For the guilt ridden, God fearing man who can’t stop falling asleep with a bottle in his hand, I believe.

I believe that for the good of America, alcoholic ads can be, and should be banned. Because I never want my mom to have to sit me down again and say, “Bailey, I fell off the wagon” all because of our bandwagon, conspicuous consumer society. Because there are moms and dads here, wishing their kids were in paradise--playing volleyball, building sandcastles, and collecting sand dollars. Because approximately 100,000 people will die this year of alcohol related deaths, 4,700 of them, teenagers.

In the 1970’s, Cigarette advertisements were banned from our television sets and radios. The 70’s were considered the “me” generation. Hopefully, alcohol advertising will be banned as well in 2016, because we are the generation of activists. We are the “we” generation.
Speech for school
2.3k · Apr 2016
Casanova
Bailey Apr 2016
You think that you can walk up to me with that sly grin?
You think you can whisper my name like that?
You think you can sit back and stare at me when I walk?
I
AM NOT
YOURS.

You think you can gift me things?
Like that makes up for the things you did?
You think you can talk to me like nothing happened?
I'VE GOT NEWS FOR YOU.
I don't know whether you want to say you're sorry.
I don't know if you miss me.
I don't know if you want me back.
Or if you want to be on good terms before you leave--
but I don't give a ****
I'm not interested
I will tear you apart if you try to be sweet toward me again.
on my last nerve
1.9k · May 2016
Memory by The Joker
Bailey May 2016
“Remembering’s dangerous. I find the past such a worrying, anxious place. 'The Past Tense,' I suppose you’d call it. Memory’s so treacherous. One moment you’re lost in a carnival of delights, with poignant childhood aromas, the flashing neon of puberty, all that sentimental candy-floss… the next, it leads you somewhere you don’t want to go. Somewhere dark and cold, filled with the damp ambiguous shapes of things you’d hoped were forgotten. Memories can be vile, repulsive little brutes. Like children I suppose. But can we live without them? Memories are what our reason is based upon. If we can’t face them, we deny reason itself! Although, why not? We aren’t contractually tied down to rationality! There is no sanity clause! So when you find yourself locked onto an unpleasant train of thought, heading for the places in your past where the screaming is unbearable, remember there’s always madness. Madness is the emergency exit… you can just step outside, and close the door on all those dreadful things that happened. You can lock them away… forever.”

- The Joker
1.9k · Mar 2016
Our Bodies Are Poetry
Bailey Mar 2016
Our bodies are poetry
from soft to smooth to hard
our bodies are poetry
freckled, shaped and scarred

Our mouths are dancers
unchoreographed, with memory
our fingers are virgins
gentle and trembling

Our eyes, are passerbys
our noses, cuddling cubs
our arms, reconnecting friends
our knees buckle with every touch

Our bodies are poetry
fitting into every groove
our bodies are poetry
from hard to soft to smooth
1.8k · May 2016
A Beautiful Mind
Bailey May 2016
"terrified
mortified
petrified  
stupefied
by you"
---*A Beautiful Mind
This movie has given me such such relief in so many ways. I feel so much better than I have in a long while.
1.7k · Mar 2016
I Love You
Bailey Mar 2016
I love you dearly,
I love you truly,
I love all that you are,
All that you have been,
And all that you have yet to become.
for my handsome baby brother
1.4k · Mar 2016
Dollar
Bailey Mar 2016
Dollar
If I had one dollar
for every time I loved you
I would still have one dollar
but it would be
a very
big
dollar

My love for you is alive and resting
Like the flickering flame of a candle
sheltered in the darkness
resting in its warmth
sparking at times
calm and swaying
beautiful and glowing

There are days where I wish
that I could love you
a second time
or a third

but the first was so perfect
I was clueless
you were clueless
we were both pretty stupid

If I had one cupcake for every time I kissed you
I would be very fat
But those cupcake kisses
are just little loves
in my big love for you

Maybe only loving you once is good
because it is not fat on cupcake kisses

I have never wanted to be rich
To have piles of filthy green paper
cluttering the space I call home

Maybe only loving you one perfect time
is good enough
because
if I had that many dollars
I would surely spend it on cupcakes

And if I had a love
for every dollar I had
I would be swimming
in worthless loves
when all I want
is you

Yes
loving you once
our only perfect once
our clueless once
our cupcake kissing once
our one dollar once
is so good

Because if I had a dollar
for every time I loved you
I would still have
one dollar
but it would be
a very
big
dollar.
A simple, silly poem I wrote last year in 3rd period :)
1.3k · May 2017
Want, need, with you.
Bailey May 2017
The ocean, sunny days, vintage picnic baskets, pigtails, laughter, tire shops, vanilla soft serve ice cream, bubble gum, warm nights, cool sheets, skin, morning quiet, orange juice, bubbles, grass, ladybugs, kisses.
1.3k · Jun 2016
Six and Four
Bailey Jun 2016
I was taught to add and subtract at the age of four. My twenty year old mother would sit me down on the grass while waiting for my aunt to get out of high school, and teach me my numbers on her big, scarred hands. I was five when I realized something that would change me for the rest of my life. The number six and the number four are both just one away from being a solid five.
At six years old, my classmate and I were given our daily snacks. My friend had gotten six crackers, while I got four. I asked, “may I have a *******?” She reminded me that I had already gotten my napkin-full of crackers. “But if you give me one, we will both have five.” She bugged her eyes at me.
“I wanna have more,” she said. I shook my head at her, and ate my four crackers.
I wanted to participate in my elementary school’s food drive when I was ten years old, and in fifth grade. I was motivated to make a change for families in need of canned food. When I went home and asked my mom for cans, she explained to me that the cans that my schoolmates were donating would probably end up in our pantry, because we get our food from the local foodbank. I looked up at our pantry. I saw some dusty cans in the back that hadn’t been touched, and multiple cans next to them. I then remembered when we didn’t have even one can, and thought of the families who didn’t have even one can right then. And then I thought: But we have six, and they have four...
A homeless man and I both had five the day I bought him a sandwich when I was fourteen.
My best friend had four when she was sexually abused, and I gave up one when I shoved past the school security guards and got her to the hospital at the age of fifteen.
The year I turned sixteen I figured I had six when I realized there was an unfairness at my school. I gave my fellow students one when I convinced the principal to make a change about it, after being sent to him for disturbing the class with my speech.
I gave up one of my six when I turned seventeen and wrote the inspiring story of my brother’s car crash, for all of the people with four in their broken hearts.
As long as I have six, I will continue to give one. I won’t stop until everyone has five, and the world is one big ten.
Bailey Mar 2016
You turn the water on.
You pour in the neglected bubble bath liquid, you pour in a lot.
You are expecting much from this bottle as you empty it of its contents. You step into the tub and lay down.
Then you see; your toes stick out of the water, the water gets cold too fast, there are no toys to distract you from the awkward silence between you and the bubbles you were expecting to ease your pain, to set your mind free.
You curse the bubbles, stand up and pull the drain, not bothering to watch the soapy water swirl into nothingness.
You turn the shower on and rinse off.
You get out and wrap a towel around you and put on your sinful clothes.
You walk away from the bathroom.
It’s then that you realize your skin is baby soft, the bubbles had done something for you after all.
You forgot to thank them before you pulled that plug, sending them to their doom.
It wasn't their fault.
You are the one that grew, that left them in the back of your cupboard. You're ashamed for only about a minute before you return to your daily routine, only to get ***** once again.
broke the poem up because a few people suggested it
1.2k · Apr 2016
Innovation And Fear
Bailey Apr 2016
I went to write a poem but
in reality
the troubled, pure
white-hot thoughts
aren't pouring out of me

Each exhale is imagination
each inhale is a knife,
somewhere in my chest's frustration
it cut the former's life

So I lay here
with goosebumps
and creativity stirring,
trying not to fall asleep
with my mind relentlessly whirring

The poem that I meant to leave
has not been left here,
but instead swims inside of me
through innovation and fear.
truth
1.2k · Jun 2016
Hungry
Bailey Jun 2016
Tears stain
mother's cheeks
as she
struggles
to fill
her child's
tummy.
She skips
another meal
and
feeds,
nourishes,
protects.
She hears
the moans
and cries
her
baby
exerts.
The dark
circles under
their eyes.
So tired
of being
hungry.
Hungry.
All other
thoughts
vanish.
Hungry.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifte­en
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fi­fteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.­
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
milli­on.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
mi­llion.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen
million.
Fifteen­
million.
Fifteen
million.
Over fifteen million children go hungry. Click here to find out how you can help--at no expense to you.

http://www.childhungerendshere.com/end-child-hunger-in-the-US/

Do you usually buy Chef Boyardee, P.F. Changs, Marie Callendars, Hunts, Orville Redenbacher's, PAM, ReddiWhip, Snack Pack, Blue Bonnet, Wesson, Healthy Choice, Peter Pan, Rosarita, Van Camps, Wolf Brand Chili, ACT II, Tenessee Pride, Libby's, or Parkay? You can help!
Even if you don't buy these foods, you can repost this poem, and share the link I've provided.
I was once a hungry child, my mother skipped meals for me and--in the hardest times--stole for me. Please help these children and parents. Child hunger ends here.
1.1k · Apr 2016
mini songs from Drama Kween
Bailey Apr 2016
Hi! This is about music so scroll on if you don't care.
I'm working on my debut album, Drama Kween, and decided to share some of the mini songs that will be in between subject changes throughout the album. They'll have simple instrumentals later on, but for right now are acapella. Give 'em a listen?

To Me

it's on soundcloud.com/iguessimbaileymartin/to-me

lyrics:
"Sometimes I talk to myself, sometimes I sing to myself.
Sometimes I talk about talking and singing to myself,
sometimes I sing about singing and talking to myself.
Sometimes I talk and sing about talking and singing about singing and talking to myself (to myself)."

The Hippie Song

it's on soundcloud.com/iguessimbaileymartin/the-hippie-song

lyrics:
"No one says lice and no one says gay, but your modesty and life you better throw it away,
'cause in a world where the media
replaces scrapbooks
and hearts,
if you're livin' like a hippie they will tear you apart
if you're livin' like a hippie they will tear you apart
if I'm livin' like a hippie they will tear me apart
if I'm livin' like a hippie they will tear me apart
tear me apart
t-t-t-tear me apart!"

Goodbye

it's on soundcloud.com/iguessimbaileymartin/goodbye

lyrics:
"I'm so tired, I'm so tired.
Of feeling I have to cry.
I just wanna lay with you in my bedroom and watch the days go by.
But I'm so tired, tired of feeling shy.
And counting how many tears make up for a year.
Is this hello or goodbye?
Is this hello or goodbye?
I wanna know if this is the last time.
Is this hello or goodbye?
Well it's goodbye! Baby it's goodbye.
I was tired of the games and the pain and the lies so baby it's goodbye.
It's goodbye! Baby it's goodbye.
So I'm gonna rid you of my bedroom and get on with my life.
I'm so tired, I'm so tired.
Not gonna waste my time!
So I'm gonna rid you of my bedroom and get on with my life."
Also, when I'm finished with everything I'm going to be posting the whole album but ugh it's a lot of work so that'll be a while.
1.1k · Mar 2016
The Things I Like
Bailey Mar 2016
I like my poems medium rare
I like my clothes to look like couches
I like my thoughts to be deep, even though they make me scream.
I like my music meaningful
I like my dancing naked
I like my people whether they hate me or love me.
I like my romance movies
I like my speeches to move me
I like my infomercials even though I don't buy anything.
I like my flowers petted
I like my animals kissed
I like my coffee strong even though my thoughts make me crazy.
I like my boys sappy
I like my girls happy
I like myself, because I am the things I like.
1.1k · Mar 2016
Childhood (a villanelle)
Bailey Mar 2016
A broken screen door creaks my name
An invitation my ***** ears know
The voices behind it all the same

The flickering lamp strives to stay
In this dusty, sleepy home
A broken screen door creaks my name

A memory in each carefree stain
At the rotting table where I eat
The voices behind it all the same

In the dead grass I play my games
Dirt clings like birthmarks to my feet
A broken screen door creaks my name

At night, on my shared bed I lay
Staring at the chipping door
The voices behind it all the same

Bug infested and near the shore
I don't know how to wish for more
A broken screen door creaks my name
The voices behind it all the same
Simpler times...
1.1k · Mar 2016
Sickness Speaks
Bailey Mar 2016
You’ve heard of us, I’m sure. We’ve been corrupting the living since life was old enough to be corrupt.
We are why humans scrub, rinse, wash up, wipe down, and die.
At first, we were just travelers. Useless wanderers floating through space and content with having no purpose at all.
Until one of us bumped into, and sunk into, something with a dangerous potential. Something intricate with all sorts of systems that would soon be tainted with this single bump.
It was nice, I guess the first one might have thought, To feel more important than this thing with all of the potential in the world. To corrupt it.
Not all of us damage humans for the sport of it, like Arenavirus Infection, Fibromyalgia, Cryptococcosis, Tuberculosis, Cancer, and many others do.
Some are just afraid of humans. They attack them because they are afraid of the medicines they create, which doesn’t make any sense because in doing this they singularly are more likely to be killed.
Most do enjoy making peoples ill.
The more competitive ones have made rules.
Alright, they’d say, Next one to swim in this lake will catch me.
If they aren’t wearing a coat, and it is below sixty degrees Fahrenheit, their defenses are down and they deserve us.
Well, they shouldn’t be so vain as to purposefully tan their skin.
More points to whoever claims the one with the feeble immune system.
I however, do not feel that it is necessary to attack the humans. We are, after all, supposed to be wanderers.
I am Influenza. I wholly, have killed or touched millions of humans.
I singularly, as .253667IFL, have never touched any object at all and probably won’t for thousands of years to come.
And while I have made this decision and while I don’t believe that it is necessary to attack humans and while I have the potential to, I do not feel sympathy toward the humans.
It is not because I am unlike them, in fact it’s just the opposite.
If there is anything Earth’s Illnesses can agree on, it is something that we have all learned in our travels:
That it is impossible for one to pity something that shares the same potential as them.
Bailey Jul 2016
When you wish upon a star,
makes no difference who you are.
When you wish upon a star,
your dreams come true.
===========================================================­====
A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartache
Whatever you wish for, you keep

Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
The dream that you wish will come true
============================================================­===
I know you,
I walked with you once upon a dream.
I know you,
the gleam in your eye is so familiar a gleam.
And I know it's true
that visions are seldom all they seem,
but if I know you
I know what you'll do--
you'll love me at once!
The way you did once
upon a dream
===========================================================­====
"Can you keep a secret? Promise not to tell? We're at a wishing well!"
I'm wishing
(I'm wishing)
for my one true love
to find me
(to find me)
today
(today)

I'm hoping
(I'm hoping)
and I'm dreaming of
the nice things
(the nice things)
he'll say
(he'll say)
============================================================­===
Flippin' your fins you don't get too far,
legs are required for jumping, dancing!
Walking around on those--
"what's that word again?"
--street!
Up where they walk,
up where they run,
up where they stay all day in the sun!
Wandering free...
wish I could be...
part of your world
===========================================================­====
Who is that girl I see,
staring straight, back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
who I am,
though I've tried.
When will my reflection show,
who I am...
inside?
https://soundcloud.com/iguessimbaileymartin/dreamywishy-disney-medley-for-beeb

Late at night so there were a few rough spots and lyric messups but dis is for beeb so if'n you don't like it, stick it where da sun dunt shine c:
Bailey Jun 2016
I know that where ever you are, you're okay. I love you, good night forever.
Bailey Apr 2016
I know they say you're like Harley.
That's because you're ****, fun, crazy!
You're scandalous, sassy, in charge.
But
They don't think about Joker,
When they say that.
They don't say you're like the Joker's girlfriend
Sidekick
Thing.

They say you're like Harley.

You're badass and spunky and full of energy.
Daring and inspiring and loving too.
You've got such a big heart.

But you don't need to be Harley, to be like Harley.

Your role model is a great one.
Always, always be you.
Keep your idol in your heart.
But don't steal her boyfriend.

That's her man
To be mean to her
Who she pines after
Who she cries over.

Don't steal her life,
Because her life seriously *****.
You can be like Harley,
And still be you.

Being like Harley is pretty cool
Being you is the coolest.
beeb
1.0k · Aug 2016
Fresh From The Can
Bailey Aug 2016
Always there for the
Beeb she cares for,
Coolcatcoolio and
**** well said so's.
Everyone stops to stare,
For she always walks and talks with flare.
Giant heart keeps her awake,
Holds on tight to loves she makes.
Insightful and delightful,
Justifiably spiteful.
Kinda naïve--
(Less than hard to believe).
Mean to no one but,
No one knows that much.
Only I know this trait,
People don't stick around and wait.
Quite a classy looking dork, with
Sarcasm galore.
Tingly feelings she gives
Underneath my skin.
Very nostalgic
With every moment.
eXciting and fun,
You know she's the one.
Zany and brainy and bright as the sun.

This is her,
to me.
1.0k · Apr 2016
Untitled
Bailey Apr 2016
calm down
grow up
slow down
shut up
sit down
man up
blade down
head up
stop hurting my friend
990 · Mar 2017
The Martin I Love You Sign
Bailey Mar 2017
She folded my little pudgy toddler hand and said, "this means 'I love you' in sign language". And since then, it's been every special goodbye and family signal. They've spread out farther as I got older, but every once in a while I'll get to see my Mommy hold her big, scarred hand up so I can see that she loves me. My eyes will fill up with happy tears because this is us and this is love and this cannot be changed.
More of an anecdote but still special enough to share <3
933 · Feb 2017
Not So Small
Bailey Feb 2017
I was happier as a martyr than I ever will be while serving myself.
Though my empathetic nature may put me at unease at times,
it is the happiness deep down within the cool, dark soil of my soul that truly matters.
I've tried so hard to change this essential part of my being,
because others told me that it made me weak,
but I see now what they fail to.
When I put myself first, I feel sick to my stomach.
There is an itch that desires to be scraped, and it is not anything that treating myself has the claws to scratch.
No, when I put others first, that is when I feel bigger than myself.
I don't feel like one of seven billion.
I don't feel like a speck in the space.
By helping and staying constantly connected to those around me--enemies and friends--I am spread out farther than I would be,
sitting inside myself.
Say what you want about me.
That I am weak and gullible and forgiving and target-worthy.
But in the end, I am happiest when I help others.
And in the end, the universe will feel the smallest, quickest brush on its hand.
And that brush will be me.
871 · Mar 2016
Go Away
Bailey Mar 2016
Please stop trusting me.
I love you but you think that's a good thing.
It's not.

Stay away from me.
Don't you know that I'm poison?
I am.

Things don't work out for me.
You say someday they will.
They won't.

I love you so much more than you could ever know.
Go away.
854 · May 2016
Coal
Bailey May 2016
black as night
staining everything he touches
filling and damaging the lungs
of that minor miner girl
who was just trying
to find the diamonds within him

but what she didn't know
was that he had only one diamond
it was the minor miner girl
and he gave her away
so now she feels poor
but someday she'll see
that she is a rarity

dear minor miner girl
I am but a jewelry cleaner
but I love you always.
839 · May 2016
Star Gazer
Bailey May 2016
I am a star gazer, too.
I gaze at him, in all of his starry forms.
The form that is a glint in the sky,
so far up, that no one can bring him down
while he works on what gives him another form--
the super-star.
A label that is rightful to him,
given to him because of
his shiny, ethereal words.
And lastly, and more importantly,
he is a sea star.
Being thrown around in this big, stupid ocean.
He clings to his rocks but sometimes
the waves are too rough
and a piece of him is brutally torn off,
as he has told me, happened recently.
Have no fear, Star.
Because everyone knows that sea stars regenerate quickly.
You will forever be,
floating,
shining,
growing,
Star Gazer.
A poem for a great poet, that deserves some love. All my hugs to you in your time of healing.
834 · May 2016
"DOWNLOAAD!"
Bailey May 2016
When I was six years old,
my brother slept on the couch.
And sometimes,
I would sleep beside him.

I would creep into the gray night,
and whisper scratchily toward him:
"Clyyyde!"
"Hmm?"
"...Wanna play Download?"

I had picked up the word from some adult,
and had absolutely no idea
what it meant.

But this is how it worked:
I would lay on the floor beside him,
and as soon as I said
in my deepest six-year-old voice,
"DOWNLOAAD!"
we would pretend to dream.

When we 'woke up',
we would have to tell each other about it in detail.
That way, we could have tons of dreams
in one night.

Mine were always lands made out of food.
Because I was fat.

I don't remember his.
Probably 'cause they were stupid.

I'm so glad I still have the chance to play
at least one last time.
825 · Mar 2016
Paint
Bailey Mar 2016
I walk around as acrylic.
But when I'm selfish I wish I'm watercolor, so that...ya know, maybe I could start my life over with ease.
I live most days as acrylic.
Some days are really hard. That's when I'm oil, and the pressures of it all build up and build up and harden so fast...
I'm constantly reminded that I can't erase a color. I have to keep going.
Layerlayerlayer STOP
Wait, wait I'm turning grey--
I mean gray...
Just wait it out. It's okay. Don't throw my canvas away.
I'm acrylic.
Another color,
There's a layer.
I'll hang up forever.
To be looked at,
and maybe loved.
I walk around as acrylic.
Bailey Apr 2016
Hello* my gifted friends
❤ ❤ ❤
you inspire my writing and my life everyday
❤❤❤
are you feeling okay?
❤❤❤
wonderful thoughts are sent to you today.

spread the love
797 · Apr 2016
Kicked Puppy Me
Bailey Apr 2016
Kicked puppy me.
Mad, mad him.
Don't understand, misunderstand.
No yell, just mad.
I say sorry.
I say why.
Still mad.
Why?
Tears.
Still mad.
Why?
He send me away.
I sit.
Sit here me.
Sit here sad.
Cry me.
Why?
confused and sad
763 · Jul 2016
I'm In Love
Bailey Jul 2016
"Why do you always walk around like you're in love, when you aren't at all?"

"I am in love.
I'm in love with the flowers I pet,
I'm in love with the smiles of the awful people in this town,
I'm in love with the sun on my neck,
the ground under my feet,
the fact that I've been alive for this long,
the fact that I could die at any second and I'd still laugh at a pun.
I'm in love with pain, because it let's me know I'm alive.
I'm in love with thrill, because it makes me feel invincible and fragile at the same time.
I'm in love with every skin cell I've ever touched.
I'm in love with the way the world changes without me.
I'm in love with the eclectic bodies I see.
I'm in love with naivety and wisdom.
I'm in love with domesticity and wilderness.
I'm so in love with my surroundings, I can't help but show it."
761 · Apr 2016
authority(haiku)
Bailey Apr 2016
don't say that I will
or I will turn around and
do the opposite
742 · Mar 2016
Natalie
Bailey Mar 2016
The way your eyes light up,
I can tell.
In your loving gaze,
I can tell.
The way you speak with so much care,
you’re a princess Natalie, you’re a princess, I swear.
Somewhere along the royal line,
a precious baby got left behind.
I followed your rays,
and somehow,
you came to be mine.
The way you smile so genuinely,
I can tell.
In your adorable rosy cheeks,
I can tell.
Your furrowed brow, your thoughtful stare,
you’re a princess Natalie, you’re a princess I swear.
I watched you from far away,
but now I have to be brave.
I’ll be a good knight,
because I can see,
you’re a princess,
you’re a princess,
you’re a princess, Natalie.
715 · Mar 2017
February '17
Bailey Mar 2017
I want my boyfriend back, I'm going crazy
.
Worry eats my life away
.
Piles and piles and piles and piles and pileS and pilES and piLES and pILES and PILES AND  P I L E S  of stress
.
I don't usually eat in the mourning
.
He left, but not really
.
Get the hell away from me, Ana
.
He still loves me
.
I could have some fun with this
.
He really loves me
.
Remember that he loves you, and that he is struggling and scared
.
Support him, love him, do not feel selfish
.
I know what I have to do and I will do it
.
I love you and I accept you
.
Danish friends
.
I miss our "What?"s and "Nothing."s
.
He called me Lovey
.
Snappy Cappy
.
Sometimes I need to lose myself to find myself
.
I touch the grass and I know what's real again
.
Calm
.
Casa Del Sol, R. S. Felker
.
I have to remind myself what's real
.
60,000 dollar scholarship
.
Doubt
.
Lonely
.
I can't tell if it's him or me that gives me vertigo
.
A chore so simple as sleep silently calls my name
.
It's easy to cry while doing dishes
.
Okay, I'm over it
.
Friends and Glee
.
Don't think about it
.
I want to be loved, please
.
Alone
.
Very hard month
693 · Mar 2016
swIm The Seas Of Love
Bailey Mar 2016
I love that piece of you I rarely find
The one that slips out and shines in your eyes

You spit out poison that blinds
I'm dull, stop feeding me empty lies


I don't see how you feel that way
Do you say what you say, to scare me away?

I feel that way because I don't deserve you
You're the ray of sunshine and the sky's blue


And why, do you think, that the sky stays still?
Because you, my love, are the clouds that fill

Clouds eventually will be a downpour
And even the skies might fall


If you won't accept my affectionate words
How then, can I give you it all?

You should be free like birds?
There's no rise for me, only fall


You forget, I am the sky
I can't fall with you, but to lose you is to die

I NEVER ASKED YOU TO FALL FOR ME
but I should have just drowned at sea


Why can't you love me enough
To stick around?

You are too good for me,
You'll only break me later


Give me a fighting chance
I won't let you down

Your words are like a lance
They force me to form a frown


All I want is to love you, take you down from the shelf
But how can I love someone, who can't love himself?
Collaboration between Star Gazer and I. Star Gazer bold and I italics.
686 · Feb 2017
BREAK
Bailey Feb 2017
e                 m                 p                 t                 y
yet so full of sadness and yearning
.
it hurts
681 · Jul 2016
Today
Bailey Jul 2016
I'm at the park on a beautiful, white-sunny day.
I'm with my loved ones, I see them playing in the sand.
My eyes get that lovely ache from the bright sun,
and I am warm, dry, and sleepy.
The wind tousles my hair softly,
I have dandelions in my pocket.
My head is hot and my feet are not.
I could stay this way for the rest of my days.

New bench, new scene.
Cooler wind, more green.
I smile at the leaves and yes, they smile back.
Ducks in the stream go quack quack quack.
Under my **** it says "NATE + MANDIE FOREVER".
Somewhere I wonder if they're still together.
678 · Aug 2016
I Had To Pee
Bailey Aug 2016
I can make it home.
No I can't.
Cross the street, to the park.
Do my stuff, walk back out.
Aww, cute dog!
Walk over to pet.
"His name is Frodo".
Little girl.
"I love that name".
Pet some more.
"It's Delia's birthday".
She thinks I'm part of the party?
"That's nice".
Pet some more.
"Did you see her open her presents?"
Cute.*
"No, I'm just passing through".
Make my way, to the swings.
c:
676 · May 2016
Mean
Bailey May 2016
I am a stick
floating downstream.
I was fine until they pushed me.

Now I am stuck,
stuck in the muck.
They pour water over my head,
as if I weren't crying enough already.
bullies.
671 · Aug 2016
Forgotten Memorized Song
Bailey Aug 2016
A long forgotten song spills out of my speakers
And an emotion wells up in my chest
I knew not why, as I had forgotten the theme
But as the melody continued to play
And my mouth formed the memorized lyrics
The words I sang fit together again
And I remembered the meaning,
The heartwrenching meaning.
Bailey Mar 2017
Skin pulled tight over nimble fingers
Light playing over moving knuckles it's
Euphoric and I
Moan at the ache
In my abused hands

Dry and begging
To be put under the scalding water and
Massaged with soft soap
Frothing and slipping through each
Fold and unfold

Prayer hands come and go for
Minutes until
The water runs cold and I
Dry off and watch and feel again
But I want more and more

I want to do this all night until I bleed and

I might.
670 · Jul 2016
We Are Human by DJ Pichler
Bailey Jul 2016
For the sleepless days, the energy-less nights,
for our day-mares, for the night-dreams,
for our nightmares, for our day-dreams,
for the sleepless nights, for the energy-less days.
We ponder why we are here.
Why do we feel what we feel?
The things that keep us up till 3 am.
The ones that make us fall asleep at 12 pm.
For our demons that tell us sweet lies,
that keep us thinking "what if?"
For the angel that tells us that everything will be ok,
for when we win out against the demon.
For when we are truly happy.
For our good days, for our bad days.
For the days where we can't tell our motive.
For the days when we don't know how to go about.
For all of this, we are human.
These are why we call ourselves human.
We over come, we bite it,
we are human.
a friend wrote this
Bailey Apr 2016
He's a stupid, selfish *******.
An immature little boy in a man's body who wanted to be like his father and get away from his mother.
Joining the military was--for him--like a little girl wishing to be a princess.
I could never convince him otherwise, even with facts and statistics and love.
He didn't want to stay for me, didn't want to stay with me.
But I don't care about that part.
I care that he's a stubborn little **** who thinks he's going to be a hero in people's eyes.
But it's not heroic if you ache for the recognition, the fame and glory and honor.
"So I can be somebody" he says.
So people will shake his hand in the store, he means.
He wants so badly to be this stereotype
that he will ignore the people
who love him,
and someday
he will become a crying,
scared,
traumatized mess in his bed sheets,
when the wars are done.
I only congratulate myself for leaving him,
because I won't be around when that happens.
This is what you left me for, Boy.
I hope it's worth it.
I hope you make your Daddy proud,
because I didn't.
I can't hug you goodbye
because of that
awful thing you did to me.
I blame you.
I blame you for everything.
For throwing away
everything we could have had
like it was a messy drawing.
You should have hit me,
screamed at me--something!
Should've done something more than cheat on me
because I still love you.
And for that, I hate you.
You stupid, selfish boy,
not letting me send you off
before you fight for your pride--
oops, I mean
America.
first time feeling bitter
Bailey May 2016
When I fall in love again
I want someone
who can hold my hair back
while I throw up my thoughts
and open a window so they'll fly away
and get caught in a tree
that we'll one day sit under
where they'll propose
and let me propose back
because I am a wobbly one
who likes the concept of balance
and stability.
Someone who will sleep on top of my body
and believe me when I say
I love the pressure
and the lack of oxygen
to my brain helps ease my chronic nightmares
--then wake up and be silent
because morning breath
is too much of a bully
to let my mouth say good morning.
Someone who pines for second hand embarrassment
enough to love when I
sing and dance around the grocery store
and get us kicked out
only to go across the street
for food that I'll either
barely touch or
shove in my face.
When we go to order
or pay at a place,
they'll understand that
they have to talk for me
so I don't get scared and cry.
I want someone
who'll shut up and be my muse
and let me make them
thousands of presents everyday
but also stress about Christmas and birthdays,
and I want someone who'll let me baby them
then have them turn around and
know that when I flop down like
a wanton cat
I'm getting some tummy rubs.
I want someone who'll
let me buy organic veggies
and not question me
when I sneak candy around my friends.
Someone who'll get that
I can't say 'I love you' in passing,
only when I look at them
and love bubbles over the brim of me,
and spills into their ears.
Someone who'll let me
stop the kissing
to run my tongue
across the sharp edges of their teeth,
and in the moment, let me kiss
what ever I want to kiss,
whether it be an elbow
or somewhere below.
Someone who can keep up
with my mania
and my hysteria,
who'll hide the sharp objects,
not because I'd use them,
but because they make my bones ice cold.
Someone who'll let me worry over them,
study them,
sing to them,
analyze them,
and crush on them.
Someone who'll let me lightly punch them,
and then cry sorry
cry sorry
cry sorry.
Someone who'll be interested in me,
want to know me
and
let me know them
and let me ask
a
million
questions?
When I find this someone,
I will flip my body over my soul's head
like a tee-shirt,
turn it right-side-in,
and hand it to them.
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