"infliction" poems
Vengeance is for God to have, But today I lay religion down to rest
The demon in my mind has been relentless, whispering at my behest
He has been in his cage far too long, he is unyieldingly repressed
I not only want to free him, I want to put his imagination to the test
My mind's eye dark and searching, the corners of my sinister mind
I have now become your worst fear and mine devils intertwined
My mental and emotional state, has made the inhumanity refined
I hate how you made me long for your pain, I am now your kind
Your flesh is but a canvas and your screams will be to no avail
You’re now mine, your soul will beg for mercy on the grandest scale
I will assault your every sense, leaving no minute detail
Until your body is lying lifeless, pointless, broken and frail
I will take my time to revive you, bringing you back to my device
There will be no amount of pain I inflict, that my heart will suffice
Before I am done with your miserable existence, infliction so precise
I will nourish every animalistic desire,until we felt you paid the price
You have uprooted in my heart an evil, that cannot be undone
The angel of death is upon you waiting, your suffering just begun
There is a special place in hell for you and I want you to see it
And if I burn with you for my revenge, then I say so be it
Taking your pride, shoving it down your throat with my baron hands
all that I can taste right now, what the voice in my head demands
For you there is no more wasted life, your breath will let you endure
And there is no second thought behind my vengeance, my hate is pure
With deeds now done and lifeless you lay
At my feet, which death did not show haste
A smile without tears did appease my lust
For your soul and blood that I did taste
Jan 20, 2011
Jan 20, 2011 at 6:45 AM UTC
.
Lear wanders in stormy open, bares warring elements,
The heavens blister, crackle, night is balmy shroud,
Wretched monarch babbles in sprinkles of wind cold,
Arguments lost by ones own pouring perturbations
And raining sky said 'nothing will come from nothing.'
Howl, howls into blackness treed in lightning splits,
His outcast soul, reels, fleshed, cut to smithereens,
Tang of salt burns on the bluffs and the sea rages,
So entire and ceremonious is Lear's fall meted out,
Air spoke, 'nothing from nothings ever yet was born.'
Sky proclaimed to man child King, here is a reckoning,
Each mad choice was self infliction, now wind flays
And sweet Cordelia lies in her innocent **** grave,
Sky, in thralls of thundering asks, 'what say thee now,
King of highborn follies, even purple heaths are rags,
Yet black and above you and night shades, whine,
Unworthy King, done in by compounded effects,
The might of maelstroms in low butterflies wings,
How now, bare trees, knifing reeds, skeletal flashes,
To rains of night are ever your lanyards my lord,'
Sad Lear so near oblivion fell mute, sky went on,
'Howl and cry mad King your reaper calls beyond,
The icy brisk heavens await to brusque you away,
Your slipshod kingdom was mere and fools' dream,
Howl, til howls abrupt abate, for nothing now comes.'
May 27, 2015
May 27, 2015 at 10:10 PM UTC
I fall to my knees,
Kneeling before you,
My Master,
Groveling at your glorious feet,
To reveal the chains of submission,
Weighing down my delicate form.
You gaze upon me,
Beholding soft skin shimmering,
As my body is folded over;
Viewing my tantalizing beauty,
As I bestow myself,
To fulfill your deepest desires,
Conjuring the darkest yearnings,
Manifesting within.
“Rise, Baby Girl’’,
Your deep voice commands,
Reverberating within this crimson colored chamber,
As your figure towers over me,
Beckoning my legs to stand,
Obliging to please you,
As my hazel eyes encounter,
The blazing intensity of your own,
Sending flames to burn,
Down to the small of my back.
Fear is the armor I allow to fall,
Tumbling to the ground,
Cloaking myself in trust,
As I allow my body to be,
Touched by dominant hands,
Trussed up by ropes and chains,
To restrain to me.
Willingly becoming prey,
To the sweet, antagonizing caress,
Before your hand aggressively strikes,
My behind,
Sending me into a realm,
Of pleasure and pain,
Morphing into one sensation.
Free is the response I experience,
As you bounds my wrists,
With your tie,
Pinning me down,
Straddling my body.
Placed between your thighs,
With your heated lips,
Conquering every inch of my body.
The Sting of the flogger,
Is a bite against the skin I crave,
As silence is the language,
I choose to speak,
Feeling your fingertips claim me,
As your territory to reign over,
As you please.
I yearn to satisfy the hunger,
Starving to be your nourishment;
For Sadism to feed,
Upon masochism,
As a balance of power is established,
As we lose ourselves in fiery passion.
Dominance and Submission,
Forces meant to bond to the other,
In a marriage of infliction and reception,
Of blissful agony,
Accepting the temptations you direct,
Towards me as guide,
To obtain our darkest of fantasies.
Submission speaks out within,
The silence as I give you,
A proffered hand,
Succumbing to the sensual dreams,
You promise to me,
Allowing you to possess me in any way,
You wish in accordance to our terms.
May you indulge upon my form,
Like decadent candy you crave,
To devour,
Savoring every taste,
Sound, smell, and touch,
In this licentious dance between you,
My Master,
And me, your fervent lady,
Of submission.
Jun 27, 2013
Jun 27, 2013 at 5:18 PM UTC
I wish I could travel back in time
to meet my 13 year old self
and tell that confused
gorgeous child
to run away.
Run away, pretty girl
run away from the boys that
are trying to use your body
Run away from that razor
run away from that bottle of pills
and do your best, use all of your will
to stop that soul from aching
without needing to bleed.
You don't have to
fix anyone.
You just have to survive.
Run away from that screaming
in your head.
Drown it out with poetry
and music
until you either
lose your hearing
or
you lose yourself
in sweet soul feeding spreading goodness
Run away from your father
until he learns how
to love you.
Run away from those girls
until you are strong enough
to realize that they're
so wrong about you.
Run away, gorgeous girl
Run away from all the
people that have hurt you
Run away from all the people that want you to fix them
Just take a deep breath and realize that you can't fix anyone but yourself
Run away from the guy who can't commit to you
Run away from that ****** up kid that wants to put his fingers inside you
Run away from that girl that calls you fat
Run away from your own ****** feelings
You're just not old enough to deal with them yet
No one should have to deal with that
Not you, you gorgeous scared little thirteen year old.
I think maybe,
just maybe
if I could tell her that
that maybe I wouldn't
feel so ****** up
today.
because no 13 year old knows
how to deal
with the things I
faced when I
was 13 years old.
and no 20 year old woman knows how to fix the scars from a ****** up past, one
that has damaged this skin, damaged that ability to trust, damaged damaged damaged ****** up that ability to let somebody in, damaged this heart so much that it's forgotten how to feel, turned off those feelings because they never lead to good things, damaged the part of me that knew how to be happy. damaged the part of me that had hope. damaged and ****** it all up beyond repair.
Because I tried for years to
keep my head above water
only to realize
that I drowned a
long time ago
and I think
it might be too late
to pull myself out
of this black lake
of self infliction
and pain addiction
and
give myself
a chance at living.
Mar 17, 2013
Mar 17, 2013 at 11:53 PM UTC
infliction-
pain
could I have asked for any different?
your pierced skin and deviled eyes
rippled tears
drag across the blood on your skin
its over.
where are your scars?
you've done too much damage
or so you say-
naïve thoughts
you implanted false lies
floating in mind space.
did you think of how you would die?
your purpose
and your prose
what has it all come down to?
give me more than a reason
to spare your shriveled self
prove your worth.
but there is nothing.
Jun 4, 2014
Jun 4, 2014 at 3:28 PM UTC
Your eyes.
I can't stop writing about them.
I can't stop dreaming about them gleaming like sunlight beaming into the windows of my soul.
And I've been meaning to tell you-
Heighten the blinds.
I can't stop fiending to be the reflection in your infliction
The mirroring of eyes, my line of sight in your line of vision
Our pupils don't just collide, they cause a collision
And uh,
The precision of your gaze fogs all coherency to a haze
And it's seeming
There's a thousand words teeming off the levees of my lips
But you got me in a daze and the waves crash silent
See inside I'm screaming
They say the flames radiated from desire are the fires most violent
And I feel your vibes like radiation;
Hazardous to both mind and body.
Detrimental to the soul.
I believe in whole this is not an illusion
They say the eyes never hide from the truth
-and the truth never lies-
See, I've already eyed your eyes
I'm not convinced this is confusion
I've come to the conclusion that
If I confided in you,
Could you agree it's a delusion
You've been opening the window;
You want to be
Inside.
Dec 3, 2012
Dec 3, 2012 at 4:54 PM UTC
I see the demons in these people,
Tired eyes carrying the weight of self infliction and the sight of monstrosities,
They do not see the sun,
And their breath is a tax
May 7, 2013
May 7, 2013 at 10:46 PM UTC
You sure are a tricky one
creeping inside my thoughts.
Suppressed my memories as well as I could,
but your spirit I haven't forgot.
Lovers, we were not.
Companions-
you always fought.
But yet I bleed,
for your soul I need.
To share this
wealth of knowledge
I bought.
Missing your words,
beyond conceived.
self-infliction,
aware-
I created this grief.
Knowing full well
the solution I seek.
Hiding from you,
for I'm just too weak.
And fear that if we speak
you will cower in disbelief.
You will un-hide,
the scars inside,
that nobody wishes to see.
I do miss you friend,
return soon to me please.
Jun 21, 2010
Jun 21, 2010 at 8:50 PM UTC
XXXIX
Because thou hast the power and own’st the grace
To look through and behind this mask of me
(Against which years have beat thus blanchingly
With their rains), and behold my soul’s true face,
The dim and weary witness of life’s race,—
Because thou hast the faith and love to see,
Through that same soul’s distracting lethargy,
The patient angel waiting for a place
In the new Heavens,—because nor sin nor woe,
Nor God’s infliction, nor death’s neighborhood,
Nor all which others viewing, turn to go,
Nor all which makes me tired of all, self-viewed,—
Nothing repels thee, . . . Dearest, teach me so
To pour out gratitude, as thou dost, good!
2.4k
Tap,
tap,
tap
Tapping on the wall around your heart
Trying to find a way in
You've built it tall and strong
And plastered
it with
your suffering
To remember why it's there
Yet here I am,
not knowing where to start
So I tap,
tap,
tap
Hoping one day you'll hear me
Praying one day you'll open your heart
I want in
I want to take your hurt
and make it mine
To share your pain
And find a way to make you see
This life your living
The infliction
you've put
upon yourself
You need not bare it alone
Tell me your stories,
Let me feel
what you feel
You think you need to be a stone
But I want to know you to your core
So I'll tap,
tap,
tap
Until I can see that diamond underneath
Not to break you
or damage you
Just to release you
So you can finally
breathe
Jan 31, 2017
Jan 31, 2017 at 5:54 PM UTC
Don't hate upon the elderly soul that see segregation as a good thing.
When they reflect with only good views.
Don't hate upon the suffering soul that proclaims to them that a place they shouldn't go.
World of different views.
Remember, they saw the shacks.
And those various colored only signs.
So in modern times, they will see thing differently.
Sure , those that only saw things as pleasant would still see it that way.
So, when you mention segregation to them.
You pointing out their shame.
Which the others suffered the infliction from.
Notice ways we all try to afford commenting on it.
Like slavery, we all try to run from that past.
Word of two different views.
Those in the South really get upset.
When you point and address their wicked mess.
Those in the North isn't so innocent either.
World of different views.
Which today is still bothering a few.
Dec 26, 2013
Dec 26, 2013 at 12:41 PM UTC
I don't want cruelty
I don't want pain without purpose
I don't want my eyes to water from a heart left dry
I don't crave some deliberate infliction
I don't long for hidden scars that never heal
I don't search for loaded words
I don't prepare for harmful intentions
I don't seek a path that pushes me underground
I don't look for confusion
I don't desire confined spaces
I don't enjoy advantage at another's disadvantage
And I don't give out points to those who play with dishonesty
Jul 28, 2014
Jul 28, 2014 at 2:00 AM UTC
A window reflects our personality
Life moves on whilst we stand still
You don’t know I'm breaking
Breathing as this relentless aching
Continues like open wound
With my own infliction of pain to fault...
Staring back at me a bitter cold reflection, dreaming in decadence
Even the happiest of endings can lead to so many tears.
Leaving only this time to reflect on ourselves
Aug 27, 2015
Aug 27, 2015 at 5:53 PM UTC
Bound by the painful infliction of your words I bleed
Never imagining that family
Would be the ones who hurt fully
Raised me
Stabbing me
Continuously
With your words
I still bleed
My grandma never believed in me
Mama never defended me
It's okay ma, I love you
How could you free me
If you yourself are still bound in captivity?
I yearn to the moment you and I are free
But the possibility
Of this task is greatly
Unattainable
How can I
Break the curse
of the words
That bind you and I
If you
Are still locked up and I
Well I - am a coward.
A prisoner and a coward
Will never move forward
So I must break myself
And set astray
But don't fret mother - just pray.
Know I'll be there at the end of the day
Despite our hardships
And your past brutality
You whipped me with
Words of discouragement
But I blame you not
How can you possibly provide encouragement
When you have never had any
Pent up anger - with no one to vent
No self confidence
But it is okay mother I love you
And if you love me
You will let me break free
Temporarily
As I rid my baggage and come for thee
I can't free you and I
Or think about we
If my escape tactics must be sharpened
But don't worry mother
I hover over you spiritually
Until it's time to break you free
Through me
And the tactics I've uncovered through my journey.
Dec 12, 2014
Dec 12, 2014 at 10:50 AM UTC
It was in our breaking
that love ran richest
through my blood.
In the tearing,
of my very soul
that light came rushing in
as if it had been veiled without my knowing.
Only through the tearing of hearts,
did your love have it’s way with me.
Only through infliction did the heart find room to grow.
Aug 9, 2018
Aug 9, 2018 at 8:49 PM UTC
So let's add another numbed night to this comatose plight.
Searching for something meaningful at the bottom of bottles,
And striving for amnesia through entangling bodies.
This is the dance of the dead.
A decadent display of flesh and famine.
A hunger so primal that we've lost our appetite for
The more filling of feelings.
You're tugging at my heart strings,
But she's ripping off my clothes.
And the opposite embodied is a worse torture than most
Would care to know.
But I do have a thing for pain,
And you're the object of my infliction.
In this scar making moment, I'll succumb to that addiction.
But your mark is growing thin, love.
And the evidence will fade.
Your territory’s waning and you have no stake to claim.
These are the lies we lead in this life or something like it.
Barely scraping by until the day turns to night.
My calendar is filling and yours is bound to burst.
You can pencil me in if you're bored enough.
I'll accept through the hangover and give you sleepy eyes,
Knowing full well we'll both end up in another's bed tonight.
She'll touch my chest though it does not heave for her.
And I'll take a shot to make this feeling better.
She'll want to spoon but I'll push her to "your side".
And I'll say I'll call tomorrow, but when I speak, I tend to lie.
I'm taking up your offer on this latest lifestyle,
Where cowardly nonchalance is the most fitting attire,
And the heart that's been hemmed to my sleeve,
Is the most out-of-date accessory.
This game is treacherous, this game called "love".
My only wonder is: when we will stop playing ourselves.
Sep 16, 2012
Sep 16, 2012 at 5:03 PM UTC
Inflection
Infliction
Infection
Defective
Defenseless
Impressive
Depression
Impression
Departure
From
Reality
Surreality
Purity
Into
Frailty
Depravity
Definitely
Causing
Confusion
Diffusion
Profusion
In
Inflection
Infection
Imprison
May 10, 2013
May 10, 2013 at 2:10 AM UTC
Now I understand.
Both the insecurities of myself and the natural jealousies;
not of potential love affairs, but of friendships and spoken whispers
that are not for my longing ears to hear.
happiness, for harmony...
but pain, perhaps a nosy desire
to know the happenings and every little secret...
is it a vice or a inevitable wish?
For a best friend and lover to welcome me into their world as well?
This is the pain that will be harbored but never revealed
it is my own infliction to carry
and whispered to self
Every night
Neverending.
May 13, 2012
May 13, 2012 at 5:49 PM UTC
Sitting behind a computer screen
Trying not to succumb to the temptations of self-loathing
Media has become the cause of my downfall
And the primary causation of self infliction
For months and years I thought and believed
That I was fine, that I was okay
But the slightest contemplation of death
Still brought me relief
I find my fingers running through the keys and letters
Scrolling past every page and article
The demons feed on the lack of confidence
The low self-esteem
And I, the degraded human being
I still set a goal for non-existence
A perfection too impossible to achieve
Yet I know that I’ll always be another face in the crowd
Another flame that’s about to die out
Another girl with too many scars,
Another girl bound to fall apart
n.j.
Jul 17, 2015
Jul 17, 2015 at 1:33 AM UTC
.
Lear wanders in stormy open, bares warring elements,
The heavens blister, crackle, night is balmy shroud,
Wretched monarch babbles in sprinkles of wind cold,
Arguments lost by ones own pouring perturbations
And raining sky said 'nothing will come from nothing.'
Howl, howls into blackness treed in lightning splits,
His outcast soul, reels, fleshed, cut to smithereens,
Tang of salt burns on the bluffs and the sea rages,
So entire and ceremonious is Lear's fall meted out,
Air spoke, 'nothing from nothings ever yet was born.'
Sky proclaimed to man child King, here is a reckoning,
Each mad choice was self infliction, now wind flays
And sweet Cordelia lies in her innocent **** grave,
Sky, in thralls of thundering asks, 'what say thee now,
King of highborn follies, even purple heaths are rags,
Yet black and above you and night shades, whine,
Unworthy King, done in by compounded effects,
The might of maelstroms in low butterflies wings,
How now, bare trees, knifing reeds, skeletal flashes,
To rains of night are ever your lanyards my lord,'
Sad Lear so near oblivion fell mute, sky went on,
'Howl and cry mad King your reaper calls beyond,
The icy brisk heavens await to brusque you away,
Your slipshod kingdom was mere and fools' dream,
Howl, til howls abrupt abate, for nothing now comes.'
Mar 6, 2017
Mar 6, 2017 at 10:39 AM UTC
We are all but sailors who drift upon love's seas
But one thing I can't seem to decipher is if the lighthouse is you or me
For this wretched tide tosses and turns me into a face in the crowd
And I pray to God that searchlight will turn on and finally single me out
For I am sick with love for you and seem to be obscured
Pondering on which of us is ill and which is the cure
And all I know is seasickness is making me yearn for home
And the open doors that are your arms let me know you're sick of being alone
So I will weather the storm clouds and the ever tossing sea
And I will look to you and know I'm the one for whom you're waiting
For when it comes down to star-struck hearts that finally choose to collide
It matters not on the infliction or remedy but that they're brought together in time
With this in mind I will fall in love with you and wrestle my way to the coast
So then you can see the days have been long and of my journey I will boast
And any treasure I find, whether lighthouse or sailor, is worth the world to me
But until then, if you seek me, my love, look outwards to sea
Feb 18, 2013
Feb 18, 2013 at 9:25 AM UTC
I hurried up to the window. It was all the way down stairs. The exhaust was at crescendo. By the time I arrived, you were not there. The exhaust fumes that plumed had left a trail in the air. It was cold that morning, I had walked out to the driveway in my underwear.
I came back inside and put some clothes on and tried to move on with my day. But it wasn’t that easy once the argument was there. Any task I would do would compose in the background like the noise of the county fair. Any stranger could become a target should my fuse were to despair.
I try to have more control than that but this morning I did not care. I made everyone around me; suffer with me at the cost of what you bared. It was your fault in the grief we shared but I won’t admit it. Plus, you don’t care. You hurt me and now I hold the world hostage. Give me my heart back or I will.
I already lost it. And at what point is the damage I received Justified by the pain I inflict upon others? At what point do I look in the mirror and find the fault upon me?
Well if you have read this far you can already see.
-RSC
Apr 3, 2022
Apr 3, 2022 at 8:25 AM UTC
I was struck on the head today.
A crushing blow to be sure.
For any other reason,
it might have killed me.
But due to the passion I bear for you,
and the fear of loosing it,
I clung to life as the hammer slid from my skull.
Only after the do was done,
did I conclude...
That my infliction of an iron grasp means nothing.
And is worth just as much.
For you are blind to my burden...
As I am blind to all but you.
Feb 11, 2013
Feb 11, 2013 at 10:55 PM UTC