Test Ting Won To Tree
By
Charles Fleischer







Rifleman decal water is to Tiny basket liners as Strained yo-yo string is to?
Dark wool glowing is to Oldest lost oddity as First genetic engine is to?
Black quail taint is to Nut curdled paint as Hemp biscuit dominoes are to?
Steam traced paper is to Lemon ash vapor as Digital ****** wig is to?
Eccentric brine mimes are to Electric silk slacks as Spark formed lava is to?
Sunchoked black hornets are to as Rescued orphan doves as Retold cat jokes are to?
Hand traced videos are to Braided rubber spines as Opal rain dancers are to?
Halogen anchor gong is to Annoying bread portraits as Soft bracelet lockers are to?
Old troll bios are to Select cherub echoes as Broken matchstick parasols are to?
Dome nine chariots are to Frayed lunar remnants as Fuming honey flasks are to?
Bluing assault operas is to Beading fluted flowers as Magnetic lawn tweezers are to?
Converted flea sponges are to Floating dog murals as Frozen Archie comics are to?
Molded road pads are to Crusty gumdrop thread as Straw ribbed pelicans are to?
Inflatable diamond vowel is to Single gender raffle as Groovy desert coffee is to?
Temporary solution radiation is to Idiotic witness mumble as Motorized marshmallow kit is to?
Panoramic utopian paranoia is to Aggravated **** silhouettes as Unhinged gun sellers are to?
Homesick ghost pajamas is to Virtuous fly fungus as Royal sandpaper gloves are to?
Gangster hayride tickets are to Deer milk Oreos as Turnip fairy maps are to?
Glue gun **** is to Nocturnal cabin mice as Cab fare corn is to?
Speckled fish nickels are to Under water bric-a-brac as Epic snakeskin paisley is to?
******* bungalow pranks are to Drowsy vapid oafs as Quantized cavern fish are to?
Raunchy snail kimono is to Coiled time dice as Smeared equator malt is to?
Metallic centaur franchise is to Transparent cheese chess as Spotted glacial remnants is to?
Sky fused pong is to Rustic mothers brattle as Granulated canister ointment is to?
Overgrown maze mule is to Mated smugglers hugging as Floating thesaurus exam is to?
Sliding coed sprinkler is to Soapy whitefish rebate as Precious lamb diaper is to?
Mushy acorn luster is to Lilac protein rings as Slapstick wrestler dialect is to?
Freaky plankton bells is to Rolling horse divorce as Morphing morphine lips are to?
Sticky razor sparkle is to Emerald muscle spasm as Glaring cat cipher is to?
Peppy unisex mustache is to Pelican fighter syndrome as Clumping night grumble is to?
Scanning paired pearls are to Ruby rubbed roaches as Satanic sailor flotsam  are to?
Glowing asteroid solder is to Ideal shark data as Failed frail doilies are to?
Numb nuts boredom is to Fantastic icy phantoms as Sporadic silk creations is to?
Crooks crow chow is to Loading spackled bonder as Gargled snowdrop blasters are to?
Outdid myself today is to Outside myself again as Outlived myself controls is to?
Venting shuttlecock upset is to Texting badminton kitten as Settler tested motels are to?
Prepare paired vents is to Prefer paid events as Pretender predicts fiction is to
Crunchy mental fender is to Catching mentor menace as Poorly seasoned lettuce is to?
Outside sidewalk inside is to Seaside outcast input as Sideways landslide victory is to?  
Compile fake password is to Compost world poo as Compose village anthem is to?
Crooked crotch blunder is to Loud crowd thunder as Divine vine finder is to?
Chucks’ wooden truck is to Bucks good luck as Sticky ducks tucked is to?  
Overhaul underway overseas is to Overturned downsized pickup as Underground onramp overloaded is to?
I’ll bite there is to Aisle byte their as Isle bight there is to?
Gnat gnawed wrist is to ***** show beans as See through putty is to?
Flapping floppy guppies are to Buzzing zipped dozers as Muddy ****** strippers are to?
Dark diagonal dialogue is to Diabolical dihedral die as Interesting circadian exposition is to?
Experimental flossing expectations are to Waxed dental traps as Permanent impermanence resolution is to?  
Outran ringside intrigue is to Sidetracked onboard boatload as Loaded firearm topside is to?
Phony ****** phone is to Chewy ego honey as Yogi Mama’s dada is to?
Nimble teardrop squiggle is to Humble cage curtains as Loyal truckstop morals are to?
Torching curled elastic is to Sonic neighbor clamor as Golden droplet integers are to?
Duplex pupil scanners are to Nacreous cloud clocks as Shrouded flute shops are to?
Lawn rocket tendrils are to Finding surreal borders as Sheep monarchs children is to?
Gloating ungloved squires are to Busting double doubters as Pushing woeful doctors are to?
Tricking snowbelt firedogs is to Panmixing blackened haywires as Unclothed shameful leaders are to?
Malicious ranch ritual is to Internal puppet bubble as Ornate underworld masquerade is to?
Rustic debonair Eskimos are to Mindless sassy elves as Gorgeous somber acrobats are to?
Learned earthy pimps are to Fearless sneaky Queens as Somber gentle vagrants are to?
Shocking horse wear is to Glossy sled fluid as Damaged chipmunk tongue is to?
Traditional agony chart is to Damp voodoo motel as Backwoods museum quote is to?
Magical cat cabin is to Dapper porpoise humor as Malicious graveyard foam is to?
Therapeutic gazelle cushion is to Stored alibi equipment as Stunning tempo light is to?
Fantastic rascal art is to Wasted prune dust as Jupiter’s ****** law is to?
Little nut razor is to Gigantic hyena shield as Hourglass pillow fever is to?
Coiled rain clouds are to Dizzy tycoon clowns as Lime eating cowards are to?
Possessive epicurean demonstrators are to Faded eavesdropping giants as Determined swanky drunks are to?
Aquatic preview pocket is to Soggy judicial topiary as Finicky hamster fabric is to?
Enlarged fruit cuff is to Obedient mumbling orchestra as Dark tenant tariff is to?
Recycled flash thermometer is to Botched temptation probe as Pet glider grid is to?
Seriously shy idols are to Costly driving perfumes as Ferryboat chapel wine is to?
Winged jalopy details are to Faithful spectral fathers as Sprinkled mint rainbows are to?
Spelling unneeded words is to Sprouting donut ***** as Blaming mellow mallrats are to?
Eroding loom keepsake is to Magnificent accordion canoe as ***** bongo fumes are to?
Souring violet ink is to Juvenile insult park as Periodic ferret envy is to?
Obedient boyfriend aroma is to Sanitized fat lozenges as Dramatic jailer garb is to?
Mysterious patrol group is to Dynamic maiden discharge as Captured hurricane ratio is to?
Lackadaisical bigot bingo is to Oblong care merchant as Expensive swamp shampoo is to?
Petite orifice worship is to Atomic barge pet as Plucked hair exhibit is to?
Elite officer wallop is to Automatic yard rake as Healing ****** glitter is to?
Needless swan costume is to Giant jungle goat as Organic picnic napkin is to?
Leaky jet steam is to Innovative fascist whistle as Enchanting idol evidence is to?
Plastic mascara seduction is to Greasy thermal ointment as Attractive muskrat crease is to?
Lucky camel pills are to White coral Torah as Eternal stage clutter is to?
Roasted oat **** is to Sloppy *** glue as Nylon table debt is to?
Steep nook catastrophe is to Empty dome damage as Pulsing breeze powder is to?
Empty sack power is to Hitched buck stroke as Red claw warning is to?
Ultra brief slogan is to Yummy lab mutant as Pathetic ball armor is to?
Nauseating fish splatter is to Obstinate ****** twitch as Strained ***** coffee is to?
Mezzanine intermission fossil is to Proven **** apathy as Golden duck shroud is to?
Civil tutors torment is to Thor’s posted theory as Yellow melon rain is to?
Immense olive raft is to Exploding kangaroo buffet as Ethereal witness index is to?  
Marching dark speeders are to Searing scribble fighters as **** tripping sinners are to?
Seeping viral angst is to Aged hermit tea as Murky bowl nibble is to?
Condensed blister guzzle is to Pink dorsal pie as Lavish speckled runt is to?
Needy insult poet is to Sedated acorn trader as Dry honey zoo is to?
Veiled trust flicker is to Deranged poser fashion as Flat sizzle tangent is to?
Purified diet spray is to Nebulous wishing target as Thrilling screen dope is to?
Majestic ribbon astronomy is to Bizarre formation sector as Rebel bell gimmick is to?
Sealed dart whisper is to Green silk draft as Cold vacuum varnish is to?
Clumsy raven power is to Insect island circus as Minted mink drapes are to?
Curved map ruler is to Tiny lethal radio as Blue fused metal is to?
Inverted laser invasion is to Damp sheep dump as Puffy gown smoke is to?
Saucy Channel blazer is to Leather goat filament as Starched locomotive hat is to?
Broken jumper leads are to Disgraced mini exorcists as Designer shamrock caulk is to?
Tweaked poachers smokes are to Assorted sulfur pathways as Collected bedlamp trickle is to?
******* bungalow pranks are to Drowsy vapid oafs as Quantized cavern fish are to?
Crawling battle worms are to Vibrating metal pedals as Mentholated matrix wax is to?
Missing meshed rafts are to Liquid rock pipes as Crinkled bean bikinis are to?
Tithing **** joggers are to Perforated buck fronds as Leather zither picks are to?
Fearing truthful cowards is to Rambling preachers mumble as Gazebo ambulance gasoline is to?
Shelving elder’s whiskers is to Poaching goalies pesto as Radical tricycle angst is to?
Mucky gunboat polymer is to Primeval maypole flameout as Cathedral greenhouse intercom is to?
Diaphanous safety prize is to Unleashed saucer lion as Dorky blonde ropewalker is to?
Tapered spring meter is to Silver silo mythology as Misguided judges medallions are to?
Alligator x-ray money is to Cherry unicorn water as Coyote cactus toy is to?
Cowardly dorm scrooge is to Atomized pewter script as Flattened spore smoothies are to?
Trash can yodel is to Flashing wired spam as Exploding chocolate pudding is to?
Sonar blasted bushings are to Threading ruined wheels as Forty shifting boxes are to?
Tiny balloon rebellion is to Softened square cleanser as Iconic soul sucker is to?
Harmony night light is to Spanish nitrogen desire as Squirrel cavern iodine is to?

Lazy winter secret is to Slow airport widget as Silly mustard binder is to?
Elephants raising raisins are to Microscopic lamb planet as Purple hay puppets are to?
Caribou venom vaccine is to Electronic lemonade choir as Demonic princess massage is to?
Beet coated bridge is to Fattened needle point as Mylar monkey spine is to?
Ashy ink dust is to Youngest rabbi planet as Orange cartoon geometry is to?
Cold green chalk is to Cobalt ladder farce as ***** river filters are to?
Sublime sheep master is to Sleeping past rapture as Subliminal bliss jelly is to?
Ocean crust slippers are to Twigged germ radar as Popping sharpie scope is to?
Zen wrapped beep is to Oak foamed code as Wicked flashing sizzle is to?
Dew eyed sleigh is to Say I do as Act as me is to?
Humpback on hammock is to Ham hocking hummer as Hunchback with knapsack is to?
Corned flag jelly is to Draped wing chewers as Tripping swan acid is to?
Futuristic Rembrandt chant is to Almond likened meadows as Asian timber blue is to?
Nap in sack is to Flap on Jack as Ducks dig crack is to?
Flowing flavored lava is to Gleaming optic layers as Enhanced goose gibberish is to?      
Flag tied pajamas are to Saline checker choir as Speed reading quotas is to?
Whipped spam spasms are to Misted shaman scripture as Testing pitched bells is to?
Cave aged eggs are to Crowded tiger cages as ****** wagon pegs are to?
Pigeon towed car is to a Man toad art as Wolf whisker wish is to?
Second hand clothes are to Minute hand gestures as Final hour prayer is to?
Slick wicked shavers are to Tricky watch boxes as Sprouting pine tattoos are to?
Waxed stick ravens are to Match stick foxes as Narrowed thermal towers are to?
Ice cave rice is to Laced face lice as Gourmet pet **** is to?
Diamond lane anniversary is to Space age appropriate as Time travel agency is to?
Lime bark violin is to Lemon twig guitar as Lunar sky waffles are to?
Fake rat **** is to Smart cake batter as Rugged fur tax is to?
Tarred raft fluff is to Flaked rafter dust as Lined liquor flask is to?
Flakes will fall is to Take Bills call as Broken maze compass is to?
First faked voter is to Entombed cartoon honey as Smallest aching smurf is to?
Fancy bared ******* are to Flaky fairy treats as Kings amp filter is to?
Bone window folio is to Whittled fake pillow as Little fitted jackets are to?
Nine nuts brittle is to Ate pear pie as Six packed poppers are to?
Incandescent playground pencil is to Elastic hand worm as Perfumed piano ink is to?
Opal shifting anode is to a Windup lion decoy as Pale paisley trolley is to?
Stacked black boxes are to Old packed tracks as a Throwing micron hammers is to?
Apricot bark furnace is to Merry Orchid Choir as an Ivory rinsing funnel is to?  
Narcotic honey nuts are to Slick flag toffees as Silk fig sugar is to?
Orange coin raisins are to Low note candies as Smelling balled roses is to?
Pocket packed monotints are to Tragic ladder hayracks as Ravishing speed traders are to?
Crayon spider resin is to Coral squirrel forceps as Wolf tumbled loaf is to?  
Silver wheat flies are to Width shifting wheels as Golden blister blankets are to?
Really tiny hippopotamus is to Masked fat podiatrist as a Sad sack psychiatrist is to?
Miniature Mesopotamian monuments are to Apple minted elephants as Raising wise ravens is to?
Lathered nymph nacre is to Sonic ion constellations as Concealed iron craft is to?  
Epic gene toy is to Ladies bubble sled as Jagged data bowl is to?
Bugged dagger bag is to Pop sliced meld as Atom bending moonlight to?  
Rural madam’s deed is to Dyed dew dipper as Eight sprayed dukes are to?
Jiffy grand puffer is to Floating altar myth as Vintage dark mirth is to?
Undercover overnight underwear is to Overpaid undertaker overdosing as Overheard understudy freebasing is to?

Black grape crackle is to Red cactus ruffle as Installing padded pets are to?
Snide snobs sniffing are to Sneaky snails snoring as Snared snipes sneezing are to?
Exploring explosive exits is to Explaining expansive exports as Expecting expert exchange is to?
Shrewd logic ledger is to Puppets dropping cupcakes as Placated topaz octopi are to?
Door roof tools are to Cool wool boots as Wood cooked root is to?
Bright fight light is to Night flight fright as Mites bite site is to?
Floor flood fluid is to Wooden door Druid as Nasty **** broom is to?
Accurate police photography is to Intelligent microbe geography as Condensed aerosol biography is to?
Cowardly cowboy grime is to Corpulent corporate crime as Bosnian dwarf necromancer is to?
Jell-O clearing shaker is to Brillo cleaning shiner as Cheerios bowling shields are to?
Mumbled mindless hokey is to Fumbled found money as Humming kinder bunny is to?
Daisy’s clock setter is to Lilly’s boxer toxin as Poodles rose paddle is to?
Watch Bozo Copernicus is to Hire Clarabelle Newton as Find ***-wee Einstein is to?
Amethyst thistle whistles is to Lapis pistol whip as Diamond bomb scar is to?
Dandelion seahorse rescue is to Crabapple dogwood farm as Faux foxglove lover is to?    
Optical poppy stopper is to Polar halo lens as Day-Glo rainbow sticker is to?
Savanna leopard spotted is to Eskimo lassos kisses as Alligator lemonade standard is to?
Bill of Rights is to Will of left as Thrill of night is to?
Baptize floozies quickly is to Useless outsized nozzles as Puzzled wizard wanders is to?        
Chaps wearing chaps are to Chaps contesting contests as Consoling concealed consoles is to?
Quiet squirming squirrels are to Aeon beauty queens as Queasy greasy luaus is to?
Knew new gnu is to Sense scents cents as We’ll wheal wheel is to?
Blazing zingers ringing are to Wheezing singers flinging as Freezing finger number are to?
Lamb tomb jogger is to Dumb numb **** as Thumbed crumb bug is to?

Blue accordion casket is to Jaded scholar ***** as German mushroom circus is to?
President George Flintstone is to Funny Fred Washington as Abraham Jetson’s dog is to?
Google Desmond Tutu is to Kalamazoo Zoo Park as Zodiac actors Guru is to?
Swamp cradled whisperer is to Cherished drawbridge cello as Bludgeoned prankster outlaws are to?
Dukes pink mittens are to Smeared nest carava

All the planets are falling
Much to my chagrin
From their fishing line and ticky-tacky
Out of the stucco cosmos.

The days are carbon copies
Of last month’s plans:
Work and meet with people who matter
Not enough that I don’t need reminding.

The second bookshelf isn’t quite full
But the knick-knacks look nice
Even the fake succulent
Helps to tie it all together.

A brown lizard on the wall
Still only metal
Extends his tail for a towel,
But all of mine are folded on the floor
Next to the briefcase-looking record player
I hardly use but use enough.

And the TV is in front of my bed
Where I hardly sleep but sleep too much
And now the incense has died
But it will smell nice all day.

When I leave the microcosm will crash
Except for the sticky ticky-tacky stalactite
My burnt out light bulb will be replaced
A star for a new solar system
If any god or goddess thinks to make one
But for now
The planets are falling.

Odysseus is angry without knowing what reason scared hopeless longing not a good student teachers raise suspicions Mom claims he is mentally not right in third grade parents send him to well-known psychiatrist conducts many tests finds Odysseus’s i.q. scores quite high doctor’s diagnosis is learning disabilities emotional anxiety recommends weekly appointments Odysseus continues to see various psychiatrists all the way through college in late 1950’s early '60’s psychiatric field is somewhat unreliable one downtown child’s psychiatrist chats about other patients then gives Odysseus baby ruth candy bar another psychiatrist with office in Wilmette tells him parents need therapy advises he will someday live independent of parents free of their influences

Odysseus Penelope Ryan Siciliano play in undeveloped land across from Schwartzpilgrim’s apartment building there is big tree they often climb near corner of commonwealth and surf streets Ryan is going on about his favorite actor errol flynn and movie “they died with their boots on” suddenly two bigger older boys approach bully them down from tree Odysseus does not recognize older boys from neighborhood bigger older boys push Penelope to ground then elbow trip Odysseus punch Ryan in stomach panic shoots through all three of them bigger older boys glare down with taunting eyes after terrifying moment Ryan then Odysseus jump up flee across street they hide beneath parked cars in underground garage of Odysseus’s building hearts pound in terror hearing footsteps on concrete grow louder they hold their breaths voice speaks out "they’re not here they’ve gone Odys where are you?" Odysseus and Ryan crawl out from under cars feel ashamed of their cowardice in front of Penelope and putting own self-preservation before her protection Ryan is particularly disturbed explains his family are sicilian code of conduct Ryan insists Odysseus swear never to divulge their weakness Odysseus promises later Penelope tells Mom

harper is broad-minded exceptional school housed in old english tudor building on second floor along hall is long glass cabinet displaying among other things 9 large jars each containing developing stages of fetus girls wear uniforms of navy blue skirts with knee socks white blouses blue sweaters which are school colors boys are allowed to wear blue jeans and shirts in good taste Miss Moss teaches fourth grade classroom is duplex with stairs leading up to balcony directly under stairs is secret meeting place and beneath balcony are classmate cubbyholes there is sunroom facing south overlooking entrance stairs to school where older students hang out Odysseus thinks Miss Moss is pretty wonders why she is not married she has deep blue eyes dark thick eyebrows premature graying hair she wears in bun he has crush on Miss Moss thinks she is best teacher he has ever known she teaches greek mythology assigns each member of class character in ancient greek mythology Odysseus is appointed Hermes son and messenger of Zeus Hermes has affair with Aphrodite resulting in child Hermaphroditus Hermes also fathers Pan rescues Dionysus saves Apollo’s son there is voice speaks inside Odysseus’s head no one can hear voice except Odysseus it is voice of smart-*** disobedient twisted child when Miss Moss says “where shall we begin today?” Odysseus automatically answers in his thoughts “how about up your sweet ***?” it is uncontrollable voice for his amusement only often he tries to ignore voice but sometimes it speaks out when voice speaks out Odysseus gets in trouble his friends think voice is funny adults get offended when he reflects on classmates at Harper and distinction of their privilege he wonders what went wrong they are troubled class in fifth grade they cause miss penteck to have nervous breakdown and retire other classes produce famous actors playwrights renowned restaurateurs prosperous investment bankers leading doctors Odysseus’s class produces delinquents gangsters social dropouts drug addicts suicides they take their privilege and run it straight to hell

creature inside Odysseus can be little monster teaches Penelope how to go berserk going berserk involves entering strange residential building in neighborhood elevator up getting off about middle floor pushing all elevator buttons scrambling down stairs knocking over umbrella stands spilling ashtrays ringing doorbells pounding doors running out lobby doors escaping uncaught Penelope is good warrior princess brother and sister can be little terrors

Ryan Siciliano and Odysseus go to see “the magnificent seven” at century theater they head south along broadway street college-age girl with large bouncing ******* appears walking north Ryan and Odysseus glance at approaching girl then nod to each other no plans uttered as college girl passes both Odysseus and Ryan reach up grab her ******* pet squeeze then run do not look back keep running laughing all the way to theater they watch movie with jaws hanging open mcqueen is brilliant all seven are so groovy movie inspires both Odysseus and Ryan.

in 1960 Mom and Dad send Odysseus and Penelope to sunday school at temple shalom teacher calls him aside "Schwartzpilgrim what do you want to be when you grow up?" Odysseus answers "architect or maybe an indian warrior" teacher says "do you know story of judas maccabi? he was a great warrior leader learn about the festival of lights and wield your sword wisely Odys Schwartzpilgrim" Odysseus replies "yes sir" two weeks later he gets kicked out of sunday school for pulling seat out from under girl during solemn religious service he never learns hebrew nor is he bar mitzvahed

Odysseus is hyper-sensitive about race and religion knows he comes from race of people who once were born into slavery nazis systematically exterminated millions of them at aushwitz-birkenaub belzek chelmno majdanek sobibor stutthof treblinka black and white photographs of faces emaciated children adults flicker before his thoughts knows jews are hated not considered caucasian in europe and russia not allowed to own land for many centuries what does it mean to be member of race of people who are despised and blamed? he sympathizes with all minorities particularly negroes who were forced from homeland collared into slavery and native americans who were cheated out of land and slaughtered by white people

You were in a Donatella Versaci masterpiece
I was in a Bottega Veneta custom
Diana Krall was in the stereo
Lemon lobster baking in the oven
And you and I
You and I were slow dancing like eighth graders
In the living room
With the coffee table pushed to the wall
And the T.V. cabinet cupboard shut
So we could have a little more room for our evening waltz
I guess that's what I get
For watching a romantic comedy and the Emmy's
On the same night
And even though that dream may be twenty years from ever coming true,
Because both you and I were in our forties
Trying to impress each other with how interesting
We could keep our relationship
Even though we both knew all we had to do
Was wake up in the morning and smile at each other
To fall in love again,
It was worth it because in that dream
I could actually dance
And the lobster was amazing
Say what you will
I have very sensory dreams
And things feel, taste, and smell like they do in real life
And it may have had something to do
With how beautiful you looked in that dress
Or the scent you were wearing
But that lobster was amazing
And your hands on my shoulders
Was a massage you weren't giving
As we two stepped through the room
And my lips mouthing every line
That danced through the air
Directly onto you earlobe
Was just an excuse for my cheek to touch yours
And as Veneta and Versace got comfortable on the floor
And my sensory dreams turned into a little bit more
My fleeting thoughts were of your smile in the morning
And I know you don't see yourself there yet
Taking pleasure in slow dancing
And waking up next to each other
But I see myself there just as clear
As I see myself right here
And I'll to drop the Veneta for jeans
Your Versace for pajamas
Lobster for KFC
If I'm slow dancing with you to Diana Krall in our living room
I don't give a **** if
We own the coffee table to push out of the way
I want to spend my life with you
I want to spend my life slow dancing with you
I want to spend my life whisper-humming
Standards into your ear slow dancing
In the living room of our house with you
Duplex with you
Apartment with you
Trailer with you
I don't care
I want to spend my life slow dancing with you
I want to spend my life with you
And I'm not being too sweet
I'm being too honest
And I know grand romantic gestures aren't your thing
Girl, flowers on Valentine's Day aren't your thing
But I hope someday soon you make a hobby out of slow dancing
Because I had a dream last night
I'd love to come true

Imagination Piranhas

I walk down the street trying to analyze what I see
Two trees in the shadow connected by a power line
A duplex, abandoned, dark and silent
Simple objects that line my path and hold some story
Some deeper truth ready to be unraveled
I try to decipher this meaning
To look passed the tangible exterior
Beyond the cells and through the atoms
For some soul or sentence
Some lost ghost ready to tell a tale
But I can’t
The story is muffled and the meaning is lost
Through the trees, beyond the worn down duplex
I see only more darkness
My senses have been dulled
Overshadowed by a vermin
A sinister parasite consuming the world around me
The imagination piranhas
Callous and cold creatures
They linger in the darkness and drift through the air
Like a cancer they grow, feeding upon the beauty of the world
Made of mortar and brick that house our civilization
They dwell in the steel and noxious fumes of industrial growth
Polluting ears with their diesel engine roar
Corrupting the space between nature and thought
The imagination piranhas
Dominating the atmosphere
Hindering analysis of the universe
With bright lights that blind the story in the darkness
Their shouts and electronic noise drown out the true song
A quiet song
The imagination piranhas…

There's no regard for your feelings when my heart is in charge.
"You feel the same!"
It's a lie we let me live with.
I'd be okay with going into cardiac arrest over you, anyway.  

My brain thinks you're magnificent-
or perhaps horrendous...
Nonetheless, you seldom leave my mind.
I've considered purchasing another mattress
(my heart wants to know if we can share it).

My body is not a temple,
Instead it is a duplex.
My body is a place where the two halves of me live,
Together, though they can't quite interact.

My body is not a temple,
It's more like a church.
All the spirituality of a temple,
Covered by snobbery and incense.

My body is not a temple,
Rather, it's like a smartphone.
It runs just like a laptop,
But it fits just in your pocket out of sight.

My body is not a temple,
It's actually just flesh.
Mortal bone and sinew,
And an ever-tightening knot at its core.

Settle down please.
Today you will be trained in Level 1 crucifixion.

First, the nail. Please pass the bag along once you have taken one nail each.

You can rely on these nails.
Each one is forged by hand, hammered out and shaped with skill.
'You can nail it with one nail,' as they say.

Nails can be used to fasten almost anything to wood. Choosing the right nail for the job can make a big difference in hold power. As there is no need to conceal the nail head and we require maximum holding power, we have chosen common nails for the job. When the nail is temporary and will be pulled out again, as with crucifixion work, we have found that a double-headed or duplex nail is the best choice. However, due to cut backs, we have reverted to the common flat headed nail.

Experience and common practice calls for driving the nail through the thinner limb into the thicker timber. For maximum holding power, the length of the nail is such that it passes almost, but not quite, through the thicker timber. 

Take a careful look at the illustrations provided. As depicted, for best results lay the condemned on the crossbeam and bind the arms in place on the timber before nailing. I refer you to your ropes and knots training last week.

One nail is sufficient for each upper limb if placed between the forearm bones above the wrist. You will find that some limbs will have been subject to a break beforehand. If this is the case, we advise that you use additional rope to bind the limb to the cross beam and that you select a site for the nail further up the arm if necessary.

Now you are ready to secure the feet. Place the feet together one over the other. Hold them in place while a colleague drives one nail through both feet. Please hold them steady and resist any attempt by the condemned to frustrate your task. Keep steady pressure on the feet while your colleague hammers the nail home.

Before lifting the crixiform into the hollow, ensure each nail has been driven in securely. Once you and your supervisor are satisfied, lift the cruciform in one swift movement ensuring the base slides neatly into the hollow. Two or possibly three of you are needed for this.

This is the greatest test for your handiwork. The impact of the timber landing at the base of the hollow will cause the body to jar under its own weight and place additional strain on the nail. In the event that a nail comes loose, you are advised to lift the cruxiform out and to use a second nail on the unsecured limb.

In most cases this will not be necessary and the condemned will hang securely long enough to allow the body to die, even if this takes several days.

Once death has been confirmed using the accepted method, lift the cruxiform down, remove the nails and inspect them for damage. If deemed reusable, rinse and dry them before storage.

If there are no questions you will now each be assigned to an experienced colleague to assist with a crucifixion. If at any time you feel that you are likely to *****, please use the bucket provided. There's no shame in this, the first time can be quite shocking; there is usually more blood flow than you initially expect. However, you will soon learn how to complete the exercise with skill and professionalism. I have complete faith in you.

Please keep your nail, you'll need it later.

aix, beck's, becks, blech's, checks, cheques, czechs, dec's, decks, dex, eckes, eques, ex, fecks, flecks, flex, heck's, hex, jex, kecks, lecce, lex, meckes, mex, necks, nex, next, peck's, pecks, plex, rex, sheck's, shek's, specks, specs, sphex, tech's, techs, teck's, tex, treks, vex, whelks, wrecks, x, x. amex, ampex, annex, apec's, apex, armtek's, avtex, aztecs, berlex, caltex, cemex, centex, cmx, comex, complex, comtrex, convex, crownx, defex, dissects, duplex, effects, ejects, entex, execs, expects, eyetech's, fanech's, fedex, finex, gatx, gtech's, inmex, intex, latex, memtec's, metex, natec's, nobec's, nymex, nynex, objects, onex, opec's, paychecks, paychex, pemex, perplex, pewex, playtex, portec's, projects, qintex, quebec's, railtex, rednecks, reflects, rejects, respects, roughnecks, scitex, simplex, starplex, steinbeck's, subjects, suspects, syntex, telex, telmex, tenrecs, timeplex, tridex, trintex, triplex, truex, vertex, visx, wall-tex, wedtech's, westtech's adaptec's, ametek's, atx, banamex, between decks, biotechs, bottlenecks, cineplex, cybersex, cytotechs, datarex, discotheques, equitex, eurochecks, gendrisek's, genentech's, govpx, hyponex, intellects, intersects, kaisertech's, malcolm x, medarex, mediplex, megaplex, memorex, methanex, metroplex, middlesex, multidex, multiplex, neorx, oraflex, pillowtex, prentnieks, rolodex, stratoflex, superx, symantec's, teleflex, turtlenecks, unisex, ventritex adaptaplex, ameritech's, audiotex, begonia rex, ****** simplex, solar apex, videotex, tyrannosaurus rex, regression of y on x

when i was born,
my mom said that i lived in a trailer.
she said it was nice.
i can not remember it.

when i was two years old,
my mother and my father moved us to a duplex.
my childhood best friend lived next door,
there were cat tails growing in a ditch behind us,
and the garage was a giant mouth
with bicycle teeth.
it is blurry in my mind.

when i was five years old,
they took me to a house.
it was an older house,
one with an '80s basement
and monsters in the laundry room.
it seems like a movie missing a few scenes.

when i turned eight,
we moved to a new house.
they moved while i was at a Titanic exhibit
at the science center.
it was the house where my father turned bad,
and we made him leave,
and he resides there now.
it is something i read in a book one year ago.

when i was thirteen,
we didn't have a home to go home to.
we stayed where we could.
we moved to a fire hazard.
we left again.
it seems like a nightmare.

when i was fourteen,
we found another home.
it was the best we could do.
it was infested with crickets
and mold on the concrete.
and my best friend lived down the street,
and we no longer speak.
it is a dream.

when i was fifteen,
we scurried off to an apartment.
the buildings were blue,
and the people were rude,
and the downstairs neighbor always makes his children cry.
and another neighbor is a stripper,
she is never home.
and another escapes with pills,
the prescription type,
she smokes a lot and talks on the phone.
even this is beginning to fade away.

you box it silly, until you get to speak to it...
you box, box, box box it into pretty, you box it into
something resembling a francis bacon...
can you even imagine, feeling this much?
and then get to write about it all, by way of treating it
a mush? i'm sure that hardly
resembles the sitter, but that hardly
matters... look at that masterpiece of a
boxed face? looks blurry, i admit...
but that keeps it as art, and i find that to be...
most necessary... for i find the most recurrent
theme as: just ordinary;
everything just being as numerous
and countless, and reproducible as the
phenomenon of spring,
    that frail thing that needs to bloom
and later die... what a horrid escapade
to give it a metaphor akin to vivaldi...
sparrows... sparrows? seriously?!
   it's just that autumn, and its scents,
and its fruits... that auburn, that khaki:
if ever orff met vivaldi, he would call
autumn: the reviver!
spring is something that exists in th realm
of dr. seuss... i.e. mainly children...
or that great dumb joy of dogs...
   same ****, different cover.
- i listen to what could be best described
as neo-**** music (nietzsche did that,
introduced the hyphen at the beginning
of a paragraph, within the realm of the paragraph,
that seriously needs to be deploit within
poetry, with no paragraph, as a
whimsical call to changing the subject,
and retaining the object form, and repressing
psychiatric investment in, what they
later call a: "person". so i guess that's
- - - - - and me somehow closing the bracket
like i might keep to that romeo & juliet phrase
of palms and monks and kiss kiss moosh?
  ****...                         d'uh.               )
because i'm the one with testicles...
and how world war ii taught be something...
that i wasn't too keen to learn about in the first place...
maybe the celt in you feels i should
have shut-up and sailed on a titanic
failure...
        yeah, like that ship...
     or how ᚠ and ᚦ.... and how θ and φ
are almost identical,
revisionists with a care to revive the latin
grapheme of æ... should look toward anywhere
but here... like that grand mythical
marriage of Adam and Eve... that gave
us umlaut and macron?
how could life, if that alone, but merely dialogue
with someone become simple,
after a father wrote something akin to finnegans wake
to a daughter? it's my ex-girfriend,
she calls me up while i'm doing an industrial-sized roof
(tar, felt, slabs, *******)
and comes up with: i'm hearing voices! i'm hearing voices!
you're not going to read proust, that's for sure;
and historically speaking, that was a movement,
not something done solo...
literally a bunch of squaters that mattered
in the birth of the 20th century.
        - me neither give, nor have a bother;
we already presume to have had it sideways
with the colon and the |... whatever that represents.
          but aren't the ᚠ and ᚦ... θ and φ
identical concerns?
  you wait and watch something else encoded
having this tenacity to suddenly implode...
you'll be left wishing a moustache is
about all you could ever grow...
                   therion thermometer.. philo...
thinker, phlegm... what's with wh and why
isn't it... doing anything?
the combination of t h and p h is
too, well... bewildering to me...
thermometer, pharmacy...
ph, th... v / d -e point...
               i once called language something
that could well be mistaken to imply
approximation...  phantom, pantomine,
tantilising, infantile, in that... d d do duplex
done...
              we know the myth that philosophers
are doers and not thinkers,
we know the best ones are not exactly literate,
or if they are, they don't bother the sophism
of implosion... they just explode onto the world
and are like: hey man!
but can someone please explain to me why
ᚠθᚦφ exists? i must have just written F, four times...
and read about fifty slang terms on the internet
to say:
really?! y.h.w.h. is just a ghetto acronym written
on a brick wall? like the internet?
         ᚠθᚦφ is probably just the same,
the way people keep making an oath, or adding
the emphasis as if they spotted a comet...
      it's just fe fe, fe fe -
or ef ef, ef ef          depending which copernican
side of it you come from to congregate
in the land of the "setting sun".
                l e f t t o r i g h t
                  t f e l o t t h g i r
they meet somewhere, and sprechen lingua franco...
perhaps like Sicily, in the times of
that liberty magnet that was Fredrick II
from the Hahenschtaufen haus...
i have to do it... akin to       n
                                         w      e
                                              s... look at that...
what a beautiful acronym...
  it's not even a case of being ignorant...
  but it seems to be the general idea of a compass
these days...
                 and to think, to have the sheer
concern to make the effort to read...
which is the only reason why i resort to having
the same effort to write,
  or where two roads meet...
or what's called the fork... funny that...
three arms and a leg to stand on...
                                                     ᚠ
                                              ᚦ           θ
                                                     φ
i reduce modern vulgarity for not enough
fucky-fucky... some reduce it to the tourism
of Taiwan...
   and how Taiwan is perfectly adaptable for
a heretical christian revival, or the confused pronoun
case of almost parasitical invitation...
you hear it all the time in england,
english men going to taiwan and looking for
pretty clay, behemoths...
      right now i wish i was listening to the news
in poland... ****! at least it would be easier
******* from conservative catholic grannies
than this oddity, that really needs a second david bowie...
i can't do it... i see paying for the absurdity of ***
is fine... walking into a shop
    and buying chewing gum... a ******* would
buy more things than i ever could...
or care to want...
               a woman might go and buy perfume...
all i need is some water, and soap...
  just as rare as finding a keen reader of kraszewski,
or a tatarkiewicz... too many people read marx,
it's starting to eat me up...
         i'm starting to see a work by marx like
i might see a bench pressing corner in a gym...
                          or a crucifix; get all vampiric
and angry goo that constantly seems to recoil into
siesmic fits of violence, always minding
the lord of mosquitos... and never... Beelzebub...
bled on the cross, talked wine-to-blood
at the last supper, didn't he? so he's not
                                     the lord of mosquitos?
the wars we had because of it...
    thankfully... to inact progress...
               as all hell is blamed for doing:
or rather imroving... oh don't mind me, i'll have
to wait 2000 years for someone to recognise me,
as i did, j. c. nazareth, lord of mosquitos and
countless wars to finally freeze chickens
                      and ice-cream; cabbage? fresh!

There were always so many lizards and cat statues made out of china. But at some point what started to matter more were the boys on the pubescent school bus yelling obscenities and stealing ****** kisses from girls stuffing their bra and being too cool to wear Limited Too. It became difficult to imagine the lizard cage behind the duplex, a chain-linked refrigerator box, when there was a school dance to be embarrassed at while forming dance circles, soda can in hand. Then standing on the corner waiting for my dad to take me home before any of the late night talk shows aired.

Flash-forward: A blow-up air mattress in the middle of the living room at five in the morning and we were high.

We’re growing up from: the VW that smelled of crayons,
skipping class to go to the library downtown,
the greasy spoon diner,
the Goodwill,
fall outs, anxiety, lorazepam, writing ****** poetry,
getting popsicles from whole foods and eating them in the park during winter.

The sun’s lavender light peaked through the closed blinds while the satisfaction of making out with a boy who likes boys felt as good as the realization that girls don’t always have to like boys either.

There’s a chance I could still catch a lizard.
And yea it’s cliché, but **** happens and things change.

I have in my hand , the very dollar bill , was a cash settlement for postage stamps in Chattahoochee Hills , same bill that fed the Kitty at a strip joint in Dallas ,  bought a Charms Sucker at a bowling alley in Texarkana ! Helped pay the rent on a duplex in Santa Fe , went toward the water bill in Reno , Nevada.  On its way to New Orleans , handed off by a trucker in Abilene . Handed over to a **** dealer from Chattanooga , wound up in a offering plate in Kalamazoo , Michigan !

who said that poetry is solely about emotion? why is it never considered an auxiliary to thinking? huh?! who the **** said i need to feel and contain it with words? this?! this is an auxiliary expressing the bombast and barrage that's thinking! do i ******* look like a woman, that i need to stress fee-fee-feeling?! if you want a soppy story, take that story to the soap factory, and tell that world war two joke while you're at it; oh y'ah but i'm no quentin t. to get away with it, am i? question: but if i'm off my nuts, numb-skulled by some ***** and talking the necessary drunk jargon? well... ain't it always: in vino veritas?! ****... tis noot ween! romans lacked sense of *****... ah! fire! water! apache guru sacred fox chief **** in the wind, said: in ignisaqua, veritas, duplex veritas! that time when you start seeing double... ha ha! ******, am i underwater or is this just a very, very, very very... very, bad choke... joke?
          oh yeah, that   ...    is actually a hiccup.

i don't know about you,
but i find that
these western "genuises"
have incorporated
claustrophobia
   into the realm of cartesian
orientation (let alone
investigation) -
i don't know how this "meme"
managed to incline itself
into a spiderweb
as a cannibalistic spider -
but, **** me!
it has...
       i used to love thinking -
it was a bit like the love
of drinking a pint of milk
after school...
  these days?
        let's just say i feel
like wearing a 32 inch waist
pair of jeans, and i have
a 36 inch waist...
  and what happens, when
that sort of situation arises?
well...
     there's only one way to
combat cognitive "claustrophobia":
you spew...
   you branch out,
you write little notices that
don't rhyme and have no
orthodox semblance to speak of
to be denoted as: "poetry"...
how can people just not use
such a medium to beat this
******* up?!
what i've learned i've learned good:
but these western propagandists
and the already insinuated
"geniuses" really have their
***** in a toaster and their *****
in the fridge...
               looking for hot *****
of fertility, and a cool hard-on...
i'm not joking...
   i'm going cuckoo up my ***
thinking:
  might as well act as a cave
          so i might hear an echo...
they already destroyed the poetics
of a sea-shell with their
******* science-this, science-that...
next thing you know we'll be
talking to mountains to crumble
into deserts...
   mind you... don't you think
that the sahara was once akin
to the himilayan mountain
range? well... we've got enough time
to ponder that one...
       i think so...
i think that what is not sahara
used to be a grand mountain range...
and you know:
   thinking that...
    my so-called cognitive
   "claustrophobia"? it becomes a stress
free zone, while thinking
    about getting *harambe drunk;
for some reason i always wanted
to see a drunk monkey...
   a cat on l.s.d.? that's just plain
sadistic... but a drunk monkey?
i always wanted to see a drunk
monkey.

It’s in the linear plane
The one that buzzes
Directly above the brow
It’s heavy and foul
Sludge like and slow
Dense with no flow
It is unappealing in color
With a dull toxic glow
It must be rid of
By placing an amulet
Made of Amethyst stone
Upon the glabella
For many days in a row
Until a duplex conduit
Is understood between
Cosmos and soul

garden hose apartment duplex
garden hose apartment duple
garden hose apartment dupl
garden hose apartment dup
garden hose apartment du
garden hose apartment d
garden hose apartment
garden hose apartmen
garden hose apartme
garden hose apartm
garden hose apart
garden hose apar
garden hose apa
garden hose ap
I messed it up
garden hose a
garden hose
garden hos
garden **
garden h
garden
garde
gard
gar
ga
g
ga
gay
***
freaky
freak
frea
fre
Free
Free c
Free co
Free col
Free Coll
Free colle
Free colleg
Free college

Ms. Minerva’s
Helpful Hints and a guide through life



Ms.Minerva…
Born September 1885….died September 1976, 91 years old.  She didn’t marry until she was 45 and had her first child that year.  Getting married at 45 was something that didn’t happen to often for women back then, especially a black woman.  Then low and behold 5 years later: what the doctor called her second tumor, she had her second and last child at 50, a baby girl and her change of life in one shot.
        But her true joy came along 17 years later at 67….only being a mother for 22 years; she was now a grandmother……that’s where I came in!  My mother’s oldest child and Ms Minerva, my grandmother’s baby boy……..Mama!!

    It is important to tell you that from here on, the stories will be in no certain order….they’re as I remember them.  As I found understanding, THE LIGHT, as she called it.
MS. MINERVA’S HELPFUL HINTS…
2
[Song – Higher & Higher]
This song became her theme song for a while:  Love, knowledge taking you higher!!  Ms Minerva (Mama) the first career women I knew.  In 1967, she heard this song and realizes that this song talked about what kept her going…LOVE!  Love took her higher and higher and it was love that she shared………with me!

MM: “Boy, you might not understand what I’m telling you, but remember it remember all you hear, see, taste and feel….. because understanding come with time and when you ready for it!”
Knowledge……. Love………Understanding……Enlightenment take us higher.

How?  How did a black woman in south Louisiana go out, have a career, a family with little education but wise beyond her years.  Oh, when I say career woman I mean a cook, maid, nanny but mama said,

MM: “those jobs keep us going and I was one of the best, always be the best at what you do…greatness comes in all sizes!”


3
Another thing I should say is: some of the stories that I will share have not been documented as fact.  They were hers that she shared with me…..
Like one night watching TV…….

MM: Lord, Lord, Lord…
CC:  What’s the matter Mama?
MM:  Did I ever tell you about when I worked at an all boys’ school in New (N’Orleans) Orleans.  I was the one who stayed with the boys at
night.  Well, there was one lil’ boy that was always
sneaking out of bed going outside playing his horn.
I would take it from him and beat his ****.  The day
they give it back to him, that night he would sneak outside
again.  Beating his **** didn’t help, he just kept sneaking out
no matter how long we kept the horn.
CC: What happen to him mama?
She pointed to the TV and said:
MM:  There he is……


4
Louie Armstrong singing HELLO DOLLY raise in an all boys home in New (N’Orleans) Orleans….was this true……I don’t know.  Did and do I believe it….YES!
This was also one of the times I receive one of ….Ms Minerva’s Helpful Hint:

MM: You can be anything you want if you believe
and have the passion for it! Believe in
your passion because you are your passion
and you must always believe in you….yourself!  
No matter what others say or think….it’s you who
must believe!

Believing, she was a big believer. she believed in people and the good in them.


5
MM:  Always see the positive in people, in everything thing.
No matter how negative someone or something is
there is always an ounce of positive…..go for the positive,
it will always carry you through and shine light

Everywhere, positive light.

I often wonder how someone so positive in my life, who taught me to look up and be strong could be so down on her daughter , my mother.  When I was sent to fly with the eagles she was told to stay on earth.  This was one of my confusions, I knew there was a lot of love there between them but so hard for them to share……Understanding comes with time.

When I was 7 years old I was sent to the kitchen to cook for a family of 5.  It wasn’t what you think.  At 72 years old Ms. Minerva wasn’t seeing things to well. So, instead of saying; Old woman you need to stop, you’re losing it.  She was told; “It’s time for Curtis to start learning how to cook, he needs to know how to take care of himself.”  So, what I thought was a prison

6

sentence became some of the most wonderful and important times of my life……
I was allow to be a child and do the things children do but at 5, maybe 5:30 I went to spend my hour or two with Ms. Minerva, my best friend…..learning the secrets of the kitchen and of life.

MM:  you have got to know how to take care of yourself.
I won’t be here to take care of you but I’ll always
be watching over you, I'll always be with you!

Like a lot of things, I didn’t get it then, but I do now:

One day, I was tormenting my grandfather….Oh I haven’t and won’t say much about him because that is a whole other story, but I’ll share this much with you:
  His name was Tower Jackson Sr. better known as Bud (papa to me).  He was born in December of 1880 and died in 1969, it’s funny but I don’t remember the month or day, it just kinda went a way.  Anyway, I think he
7
was married once before Ms Minerva…that’s what he said.  He had a daughter…Aunt Traci….who was old enough to be my mother’s mother.  Remember THE COLOR PURPLE he was kinda like Mister and Old Mister but not as bad.  But Ms Minerva wasn’t Ms Celia…she was more like Sophia. Papa loved me unconditionally and he was my playmate but I don’t think he realized that point but I had a great time.

Back to one of the days I was tormenting him…he was finish with me and he got up and came after me…he was between 75 or 80.  I starting running and he came after me.  We lived in a house that was once a duplex, I ran out of his room, which was in the middle of the house, took a left and headed for the kitchen and the back door, that was open to freedom.  I got to the kitchen and I could see the back door standing open and waiting for me….  But out the corner of my eye, I see Ms. Minerva washing dishes.  I turn right, then a sharp left and I’m almost to the door…..just then an arm reach out and push the door close…..I can’t stop……I hit the door and fall to the floor.  Just before papa grab me to start the whipen’ and mama looks down at me and say:      

8
MM: Boy, didn’t I tell you to stop running in my house and don’t every run away!”
Well, it was all over.  I got a whipin’…one I would never forget.  Papa felt so guilty he took me for Ice Cream almost everyday for a week.
But later that day…….Ms Minerva’s helpful hint:

MM:  Baby the reason I don’t want you running, especially when
you’re scared, is because you’ll be running for the rest
of your life.  When you run out of fear you’re only
running from yourself.  No matter what people think
or what’s happening stand and face it…Don’t Run!
Believe in yourself and you can beat it.

I didn’t really understand what she was saying, but when I’m scared I hear her voice and I stand (sometime that old confusion comes in with my mother) but most time I stand, face it and deal with it.  Growing, Changing and changing and growing!  Stronger everyday.


9
I remember when I was 12, it was a Sat and a beautiful day and Ms. Minerva called me into the house.  It wasn’t time for cooking and it was Sat but I went:
MM:  I need to talk to you.
CC: Mama can we talk later I’m playing.
MM:   No, I want and need to talk to you NOW!. let’s cook.

I knew that was it.  When she says: “let’s cook” the battle was over, she felt it was important.  We got to the kitchen and started pulling stuff out …
MM: You’re special
CC:  No, no don’t start this again.
MM:  No, no, no you’re special! You’re a *****, a punk, *****…

There were a few other choice colorful names…Then she said:

MM:  Now that someone that loves you, truly loves you have
called you these names they can’t hurt you.  You’re gay
and it’s not something I would chose for you but it’s

10
who you are.  But it makes you more special and wonderful because you are different. You are my special, but it’s only apart of you and your life, not your whole life or the whole you.  You can chose to practice or not.  You are made up of many parts, many yous…..Be Proud of who you are! Never hang your head, You will be a great man…even greater because you know who and what you are.

That day, I knew what love was and what love is.  Unconditional Love.  I was Proud to be who and what I was and who and what I was to become.  Proud of Who I Am and What I Am.

Music was always heard in my house, all kind, mama believed in   experiencing everything in everyway.
MM:  You need to know about it all, don’t let ignorance
be your down fall.  That’s what’s wrong with most folk,
they just don’t know and don’t want to learn.  Education
is freedom; knowledge is light….don’t ever stand
in the dark, you’ll only hurt yourself.

11

There were a few things I didn’t learn or just didn’t remember.  Remember I said; she didn’t like running in her house.  Well, when I was a kid I was a runner, a mover, didn’t want to get caught…so I just kept moving.   Well, one day my mother was going to whip my ****, I don’t even know why this time but she grab my arm and I just started running around her and every time I heard the belt hit…I would yell.  I think I might have gotten hit once or twice but my mother’s legs, oh boy, but she kept going and so did I.
Then I heard the voice…….
MM:  Sister, what are you doing?
Sister, that’s what everyone called my mother, even me.  she sat down in her chair
MM: Bring that boy over here and let me show you
how to do that.

The she put me on my knees and stuck my head between her knees and turn her feet in and locked her knees.  My ears were hurting but not compared to how my **** was going to feel.  Then I heard……

12
MM:  Now, see you got wide-open ****!

Then the whipping began and it was one I’d never forget and the whole time she just kept talking to my mother…..I can hear her and feel the belt now..

MM:  Girl you need to get out of the way and stop making
it so hard.  Just breathe and believe, it’ll come together….
Now, go put something on your legs.

It took me awhile to start breathing but I did and I remembered what she said; “Just breathe and believe.” and when I don’t I just remember that belt on my ****.
Whenever people hear this story, they’re shocked, confuse…well, this was a different time and Ms. Minerva was a different kind of woman.  A wipen' wasn’t something that happen everyday, I never ended up in the hospital and I was shower with love….. a different day – a different time.
              


13
Around that time I remember I went through my Ultra Black stage.  I had some problem at school and I hated all white people and I was very
vocal about it.  Mama, just listen and I went on and on and on….and somewhere in there she hit me and it shocked and stopped me in my tracks.  Then she looked at me and said:
MM:  Who spit on you?  Who’s bus did you sit on the back of?  
Who’s kitchen or yard did you work in?  Nothing, nothing has happen to you that bad to hate…..Don’t hate it takes to much energy.  Remember the positive.  Some white people are ignorance and you have to educate them.  You can’t be just one thing in America you have to know about all……people and things.  There will come a time in America when people will be more than just one race, we have and are mixing it up.  LEARN…we are all connected, we are all one, and we are all God!














  14

One other thing about my grandfather (Bud)…he had a scar over his right eye and I always asked him about it and he would say, “Go ask mama.”  But being a kid I would forget and then ask him again.  Well one day I remembered to ask Mama how he got the scar.  

MM: Who told you to ask me?

CC:  Papa……..

She started laughing and told me to sit down……

MM: One day papa came home and had decided he was going to beat me.  Someone had told him that I would take it because I should feel lucky he married an old woman.  So, he came in and hit me!  I had the broom in my hand (I had just finish sweeping) and I took that broom and started beating him with it until I broke the handle on his head.  But he kept coming and backed me up to the mantle where I had my teacups. (She collected cups and saucer) and I begin throwing them at him and when I realize I was breaking my cups…. I got mad and threw them harder and one hit him over the eye…. He stopped and went down…it was a bad cut.

cc:  What did you do?

MM:  I stepped over him and finishing cooking.  I knew he would live and I saw it didn’t hit him in the eye and it gave him something to remember this moment.  You have to leave a mark on people to remember you by….. hopefully it’s a positive mark but sometime it might have to be an ugly one.  People will treat you the way you let them and there will be time you have to show and leave them something to remember it by.  Don’t go through life getting beat up especially by yourself.

There were a few times I didn’t follow that bit of advice…...but understanding, the light came in time.


15
MM:  You have to open up and let people in --- because a lot of times you see yourself through them and don’t you want them and yourself to see the truth?  THE TRUE YOU!

Early mornings were wonderful for Ms. Minerva:

MM:  Morning is my time to talk to Me and God and get us together for the day.  Some folks don’t know that they are God….your positive energy creates your world and parts of the world of others.  When you create you must be honest, positive, loving……God!  So, my quiet times in the morning is finding honest, positive, loving, creative things and feeling…..finding God in me!!!!!!!!

(Song – Amazing Grace)


One night while watching TV; we watched a lot of TV…..watching TV and cooking…anyway, it was the Mitch Miller Singers and Leslie Uggams was singing:

MM:  That’s a cute little colored girl.
CC:  Mama, we’re not colored anymore, we’re Black.

There was silent and then a sigh….

CC:  What’s the matter mama?
MM:  I’ve been *****, colored and a few other names that I don’t want to talk about and now I’m Black……I wish they would make up their minds what I am!

Then she told me:

MM:  No matter who or what people think you are…You have to know yourself, people will always try to make you into what they want you to be but the final choice is yours. You Must Know Curtis.

Her helpful hints could and would come anytime, anywhere:
MM:  life is a lesson to learn…never, never stop learning!
16

Whenever I talk about Ms. Minerva I realize how much she means to me and how good it makes me feel because I see how good it makes others feel……people showing me…..Me and Ms. Minerva.

The day Ms. Minerva died I was in Shreveport/Bossier, LA in the Air Force, it was September 1976.  I was at work in the printing plant at Barksdale AFB.  My boss told me the commander wanted to see me, he was acting a little strange but at the time I didn’t think much of it.  Walking out to my car my best friend ran out after me and said he was going with me….”they call for me too.”  We got in the car laughing and talking about all the things they coul

There's a woman seeing much trouble
but she's always grateful of this life

She could be living in miseries and pain
but she never forgets to smile

She knows that life is a **** duplex
yes, she believes in life's duality

The yin and yang, the bad and good, black or  white
she could be sad or happy

But such reality of life, one cannot change
but understand and accept

For if she will live with objections
would it give her peace and won't regret?

Oh human, the war within oneself
must be treated with care so you'll understand

That life's gift after winning a battle
is best enjoyed when you don't always demand.

Civil servants
caustic charms.
Forever Old School
Duplex stairways.

A yarn of angels play, loose-braided
Blazing wings have dawn blockaded
Devil's duplex dance undoes their knots
Ropes their oath has plaited rot
Mannacles enslave perception
Realms of sight dulled to a dimension
The fallen world a ruin, grim
What are you doing seraphim?

We must throw off this darkening curse
Feel the irrepressible light of the universe
Yield to the cosmic flow of love
Make peace on earth, as above
Heal the agony of a world,
Then Chaos which has now unfurled
Will be compelled to give its' way
To reason's day and harmony

Parallel tables down this neighbourhood street
I can see some of them from distant windows
One is vacated
One is full, people buzzing about
Hot food coming out of the kitchen onto the table
Bubbling, boiling soups, freshly tossed salads
Glasses brimming with new stories
Then, to the right, a person
Sits at their table alone,
One dim light, eating from a bowl
My guess is cereal.
Stories, stories, stories
Troubling questions
Awkward silence
He’s meeting the parents today
So, he fidgets and taps his feet
She’s telling them she got into college
He just got home from his best friend’s funeral
The other house is dark,
They always have dinner at six
But today, the lights are off
Trip? No.
They’re saying goodbye to grandma in the hospital
That couple in the duplex
I think it’s their delivery date
There’s that one house,
Everyone eats at a different time
Mom, daughter, and second daughter rotate washing dishes
but the older one just got married
it looks like they are still settling into the newfound gaps
her brother left today
a house that used to be loud and crowded
now, two empty nesters
they never eat at the table anymore
they put on the TV
with their plates
because the couch is a smaller space to fill
than these dining room tables

Re-launches of the feet begin, the twelve Gigas Camels rise, with their even toes, they would begin to detach the ungulate nails with fat deposits of the six remaining camels. They ripped the epidermis with their nails to pour out the oil and grease lamps they need to distribute the Full Moon on each palm of each component. The moon was celebrating, wandering everywhere and picturing King David's court, slumbering in his cubicles as he fell into the first light of the second-morning dream. Undivided, they walked in procession through the source of the change in the social-mystical paradigm that held them together, they were Raeder and Petrobus, Alikantus with a golden mount on his small back, the Lepidoptera, bumblebees, bees, and wasps, who walked silently and on tiptoe over the first level of damp wind at dawn, many of them alighted on the backs of the immune camels, to advance with them to the restored Gethsemane cam point.

Its phylogeny collaterally imputes the taxonomy that belongs to the camelid genus, which is a taxonomic category that is located between the Judah family and the Middle East in the buried ecclesiastical species; promoting a genus of a group of organisms that in turn can be divided into several species. They being strictly herbivorous, the musculature differs from other ungulates, since their legs are attached to the body only in the upper part of the thigh, instead of being connected from the knee upwards by their skin and muscle, therefore they are It will make it very easy to connect with the flying insects so you don't have to kneel. While the six who sectioned off the warehouses of the other six, they will remain stationed and interceded, until their superficial wounds heal, before departing back to the port of Jaffa. On this long journey until dawn they must remain standing on their foot pads, to resist the final farewell rite of the twelve caverns, when they leave the placental sites that had been developed with the Primogeniture to empower themselves in the vestigial area of the Aramaic word rescued. This will be to consent and to scale the prosperity of having the signs of vitality intertwined, in each nostalgia of calls and responses of the messages for the "Propitius This Humanity" that is projected in the secular future. This will be generated by external stimulus every time the intention to communicate with the ceremonial of existence-life-deaths-fullness is presented, resembling the voice in greater incisive devotional forces, clinging or grasping in the most minimal terminologies, which may even pass through stop or not be understood when the Golden Gate of Jerusalem is inaugurated.

From the top, very high, you can see the Gigas species walking with six candlesticks, these species wading with their artiodactyl locomotion, towards a wave over the flames of the candelabra, ibid towards the rock of the Mashiach. While the other camels were recovering from their wounds, they looked with their serene eyes, very warned, for the proselytizing nunciature that will channel reactions in the Hexagonal Progeny, also being absolved of the commitment of the prayers by the new launch of the ceremonial of atmospheric systematization in Gethsemane. , with the Messiah signals with the frame, reverberated volume to flood with light, and sounds in all geographic areas that have not had a subscription. While the Gigas tread earthly with their ungulate nails, Vernarth and Alikanto, Saint John the Apostle, King David, Eurydice, Raeder, and Petrobus (The Hexagonal Primogeniture), solemnly deprecated before such an episode. It was just a short time before dawn and even the moon disputed with other stars above shining brighter in such an exalted event ..., as it is to enchant them, at the moment when everything would seem placid and gestation of winged embryos, appearing from the top of Olivos Berna near the Cherubs. They came with the Mashiach, which brought them merciful news. They could be seen from a deep meadow, in two spots of their splendid white tunic, full and golden petals and blue tassels, with Lepidoptera around Him ..., by the perimeter distilling in the blue crimson iridescence.

Descending through the foliage of the lighted olive trees, previously illuminated by the northeast ***** of the orchard, the Cherubs and Archangel Michael and Gabriel, came with the decided parallelism by sixfold the interpretations manifested by the Lepidoptera, in order to consolidate the institution of the north side of Gethsemane as a sanctified area from an Aramaic devotional invocation, of absolute naturalization of classification of Cherubs and Lepidoptera as winged tetra, and cultivators of phylogenetic transmission of the pollen-garden on the opening of the gynoecium of the Olivo Berna in the Valley of Olives, and of the taxonomic deliberation by the hierarchical precept of the georeferenced species of the aerosismic corridor, and the rectilinear passage between Bethlehem and Gethsemane.

On the tops of the olive trees were the Cherubim and the Lepidoptera, fluttering through flowery branches intertwined with the Messiah's tunic that had been descending with a hue of the Torah's handsomeness, then a light of pre-dawn fireflies re-blossoming in its mood. These brought millions of bundles of other thousand groups of other forges to be born among the first lamps of the day. The Lepidoptera ascended by oval intervals, in the spiral path through the petiole until the fifth generation of Rapa or Esquimo of forty flowers, with four white petals in phylogenetic simultaneity with Cherubim and Lepidoptera in four elemental portions, to deliver the fundamental membrane generating the physiognomy of the Messiah amidst the transposed and blonde scarlet lights of the Messiah's face, in the contextual crucifix of themselves, on the shoulders of the vapor of Capernaum. The Esquimo or the flowers would grow in clusters between ten to forty flowers in graceful series, depending on the variety, each flower would also have four Lefkí Zoí petals, a little pulpy, facing each other in the symmetrical cross. The flower will bring in the center a yellow-orange hue of an arboreal sphinx, which would be filled with strings that will gradually transform the appearance of the oily tree, giving white touches to the olive grove before the stinging looks of gallantry. Each flower will approximately dine on its captive septenary pollen so that the flowering phase of the olive trees will become in a brief duration, but of rabbinic slip, in the cyclical lives of Syriac Aramaic poetics. The hermaphroditic female caste will bring you the biblical universal pollen, with convulsive stamens and overloaded pistils traveling more than nine and a half miles from Bethlehem “Kafersuseh” to the orchard. Faced with the majestic pollination, the Archangels Michael and Gabriel will invade the dual percentage of the gynoecium of the flowers, giving way to the Meshuva or White Mantle, full of tremendous petals Lefkí Zoí or snowy life. Vernarth falls to the ground, and shudders between the petals, filling his entire body and face with thousandths of them, many of them being transmuted into the oily fruit of the Universe, palate between his ring finger, and the index finger with Purified cadence of the Mikvah. , floating in such an elliptical orbit of the neutrons of Relativity, and the Micro Universe to be ecstatic with the presence of the Messiah with its white robe of petals. Between Hippocrates and Aristotle, the scarlet air was twirled, full of fragrant gum resin, the iridescent of mental hallucination and Ektasis, came down with the tassels of Petals Berna in his tunic alba, the Mashiach rushes where Vernarth, takes it and indicates to him filially:

Mashiach: “Only you…, in each of these Lefkí Zoí cells you are…, and in which you are not in my memory, the fruit of the Berne Olive Tree is reborn. Over the glass of this species I heard your impetration, I know who you are and gratitude for resisting your lymphoma so nobly, I took it out of your soul when it was confused with the fresh breeze of grass that fed the fungi of pain. Mitzvah or "commandment", immerse yourself in this columnar Mikveh of Lefkí Zoí of petals Berna, here the voices and words of Aramaic, will run in a row to the right, to **** the target of my Evangelized thoughts, with your miraculous grace when redeeming John Apostle of his exile. Come to me walking from this unleavened bread of the elixir of the Bern olive tree, and let us drink the Hanukka wine in its vital dawn that boils with every sip, and in your sore streaky courage. I am panting, I come from a very remote distance, but I have taken this road from Emmaus to get you up. Get up and come to My Vernarth! ”.

Vernarth erects the column of him purified with the petals emulating the Mikveh "Purification", he predisposes himself to the Holy path of the Meshuva "Return to God". Thus from today Vernarth is born and revives to continue its journey back to Patmos ”. By the time he got up, the elliptical pollinations of Trifolium fragiferum clovers were crossed, with stolons frolicking from the obovate fragmenting ultraviolet. The inflorescences became globose to fall into the hands of the Messiah, between a golden hairy chalice that simulated the Vexillum from great lengths of eternal love, Lefkí Zoí; or Berne petals make indehiscent duplex of the fruit seedling, mostly yellowish-greenish with dark purple spots or spots. It has a deep main root, in cross-pollination favored by insects, with the necessary vernalization for the development of flowering with the exaltation between both.

Sibila Herófila sings (bis): “It is not the absence of good works in the book of life that seals the fate of the individual, but of his name. All sorrow is inviolable, the original Greek religiosity, with four gods Leitourgia Orama; Perseus returning the eyes of the Beautiful and hungry Graeae, delivering Vernarth's right vision in the captured catacombs of the corrupted resurrected bodies, before being corrupted. He was supported by Asclepios, the physician-god, Hermes, leading the souls in the wind tunnel in the 212 of the tubular level, the enigmatic Cabiros, and finally Prometheus, on the agora in the bonfire of humanity. On his twentieth birthday, the oracle at Delphi commanded Orestes to return home and avenge the death of his father. Orestes returned home with his friend Pílades, son of Estrofio. According to Aeschylus, Orestes met his sister Electra at the tomb of Agamemnon, where they had both gone to honor the deceased; they recognized each other and planned how Orestes was to carry out his revenge. But Vernarth goes ahead with the astonishing stolons of the Trifolium Fragiferum to docilize the trial on the Aeropagus or hill of Ares, Athena receives Orestes on the Acropolis of Athens and organizes a formal trial of the case before the Areopagus hill, a court formed by twelve Attic judges. The Erinyes demand their victim, Orestes alleges Apollo's mandate, the judges' votes are evenly divided and Athena, with her decisive vote, declares Orestes innocent with a bouquet of the resplendent hybrid of the Vernarth Mitzvah "

This town gives small gifts
if one drives down the proper
avenues or alleys.

Joe Rubidoux couldn’t have fathomed
some of his village’s future
backward advances.

With a fondness, perhaps misguided,
the soul-forming streets, rife with potholes
full of memories and busted tie-rods are
sought.

This sour Saint speaks
as the miles
of moonlight slide by and play
their personal history slideshow
just below the visor.

It is thought to turn left;
heading down 4th,
to where the wire baskets
were filled with hand cut potatoes,
and the bellies of barnyard birds
were plated up for joyous devouring.

Sadly, those baskets are hung to rust,
and those worn tables and vinyl seat cushions
are home to things more wild than the eyes
of the boys that ate gizzards fresh
from hot grease,
sopping it all up with white bread.

The sky begins to purple,
like the clover in those abandoned lots
near to where the coal trains still chug
down the line.

Places that made a man
are passed,
remembered as though
part of someone else’s
life.

The yellow paint and brown shutters
of that chopped-up duplex bring a sigh
that is as heavy as the coal cars that clatter by.

The need for what was,
what had to be,
is discussed
and proven to be for
good and all.

Because the man
behind the wheel
lives inside this municipality
seeing not mediocrity,
but marvels that reside
unnoticed as the miles
and miles of moonlight
continue to slide by.

*
- JBClaywell
© P&ZPublications; 2017

Underneath a duplex in it's basement a wide assortment of pipes and appliances are mounted everywhere. Some pipes hang from the ceiling disconnected. Holes stuffed with insulation in the concrete foundation. The musician may sit and listen to the sounds of rushing water, boilers and furnaces kicking on and find music in it. The poet may find beauty in the mystery of it all and mention it as a metaphorical line in an upcoming piece
But when the plumber walks down
he sees it for what it truly is. He understands the sounds, the disconnections, the holes left behind by absent appliances, what goes where and why. Inside his mind he sees every movement of every machine, can pick any problem out of sounds and gauges. Imagine having an acute understanding of the world around you and how to work with it. I'm starting to think being a dreamer is more of a coping mechanism than anything.
I'd say I aspire to be a plumber
But I'd just be another poet making another stupid analogy.

Its been 4 years since I have been on this site many new changes both here and in life.

I own my own home a rental duplex at that. I got a new job with good pay and a union. I have been to the ER a few times for health problems but I wont sing the blues I'm still here.

Covid-19 breaks the US and world great depression 2021 is just around the corner.

I'm at the tail end of my 20's 30 is coming up fast so many things I have done. Yet so many more that may never happen will see about that.

HERE is for more tomorrow than yesterdays more bright sky's than rainy days  more pace and harmony for all humanity!!!!

from the videos i watched online -
i can truly attest one thing
and one thing alone:
    ars dialecticis est mort -
  i.e. the art of debate is dead;
nietzsche was wrong
in slandering dialectics -
the most civilised societies
allow dialectics -
  there's no point defending
a "freedom of speech"
when there's no discussion to be had.
street preachers excused -
       what's the point of free
speech when there's no
      "freedom" regarding discussion?
there is no art of poetry,
the only supremacy of art is
the art of discussion -
           but since this "art"
is nowhere in the framework of
a revival, why bother?
what's the freedom of talk,
when all it surmounts to is a
blatancy of a placard?!
              dialectics is dead,
it died with socrates -
       what we're receiving is
an echo-chamber of monologue,
point being:
    i don't even know what
the mongolians are trying to
keep up with...
            and when did
cis- become sis-?
              given the examples,
we are shy of the 26 "unique"
encodings of said speech...
                    never did a kettle
breed a cat...
                        we're done debating,
there's no debating,
  there never was a debate to begin
with...
              we're not going
toi debate, because we are so
entrapped in an ultra-individualistic
crap (yes, i will throw custard
at you) -
         what orwell deemed
cogito duplex (double think)
   has morphed into
an uprising of revisionism:
      coetus cogito (group think) -
how did you expect people to
cling on to the bleaching process
of clinging to pronouns,
when these are being usurped?!
         the art of discussion is dead!
dead! dead! dead!
                  with your nag hammadi
christ 2nd resurrection?!
            iconoclasm gave birth
to the death of dialectics -
       we no longer have effective
measures to study a dialogue -
   we only have examples of
a mistrust in monogamy,
and monologue -
                          i see no future
for the art of dialogue -
                  which is why this lost
art strengthens the position
of the ultra monologist: god.
                      we're not having
a discussion, 1 year to 10 years from
now...
         prior to writing, history must
have been written akin
to a phraseology of claustrophobia -
constrictive -
   suffocating -
                 we wrote to gain
intimacy with thought:
instead we gained the intricacy of
intimidation...
                   whether that be by
thought alone, or otherwise...
      prior to writing history
        history was the lessened &
continually lessing observation
deemed worth "observation",
but of course we exfoliated in our
"demands"...
                 besides the point:
the art of discussion is lost -
  since we have established our worth:
to be none other, than,
  a desire for fictitious tales that lead
to no other discovery, other than
a discovery of a cul de sac.
                 no morning with no
cockerel to croak its adhan -
   i'd revive in the anti-pentagram:
an adhan at morn,
              and an adhan as sunset...
  whatever freedom you give -
shame the freedom of speech
  never allowed the revival of dialectics -
but what can expect,
   given that this freedom arose
from a language that abides by no
diacritical desires -
     where no eye to tongue to breath
speak of diacritical markings be said -
hardly a surprise that
  the art of debate be revived...
          seems easier to club a person
dead, than to squire with his
saber i a duel...
       shame, to be honest...
               the lost art of debate,
which makes all subsequent "debates"
on the internet, a superfluous act of
guilty-pleasure procrastination.

white is hardly a colour of
surrender with you flapping
such excess of words;
next battle nearby? call me when
you encounter Hastings on
the transverse trampoline.
i find that critics have stiff
vocabularies, polished ones
ready prim and ready corset,
ready chalk for skeleton
in shadow ****** complexions,
the uncreative always speak of creativity;
it's chequers or chess, poker or bridge,
****-head gaming above all the turds,
carding to a duplex of the shuffle:
n'es pas?

the cities
redraw their borders and
fragment their spaces
into small cubes:
apartments,
studios,
and duplex houses.
and you,
with a thousand windows open
in windows,
your emoji hands,
and your microphone muted.

When I was nine years old, my mother threw me into the shower.
Holding the removable shower facet in my face and proceeded to drown me.
This wasn’t a regular occurrence, fully clothed body and screaming for her to stop.
Choking, crying as this water cascaded into my open mouth while I struggled against the grasp of a plump body.
This scene, shattering protrusion of fear and betrayal.
A woman clawing out of flesh from the inside. “Don’t hurt her, she’s your daughter” one voice said but the urge was too strong.
I knew this woman, as she ripped me sleeping from my bedroom.
The smaller room in a two bedroom duplex adjacent to the bathroom and not very far.
“God wants me to do this”echoed repeatedly.
My brain registers the reality that she doesn’t intend to hurt me but I can’t breathe.
This only lasts a few minutes, she has done the lords work of cleansing the evil from me.
My mother apologizes profusely, but she is still my mother.
She holds me and dries me off.
I cry.
The moment passes.
And everything is normal.

It doesn't feel right
To be angry,
To be sad,
To have envy.
We want to just have
Peaceful, happy living.

But they are called emotions for a reason:
It's not just the happy and hopeful,
It's also the dark and scary,
The distracted and tired.

It has been said
That the body is a "field of sensation."
A field may have an abundance of the same produce,
But different sections
Can receive different presence.
Presence...

Living in the present
Does not mean that everything will be fine,
Yet also does not necessarily mean vice versa
Either.

When a wrong isn't done toward a party,
When wrong is only pumped inside the body,
The body feels balanced and cleansed
For when the happy feelings return.

If foxes have holes
And birds nests,
So wrongs share a duplex with rights
In the body's quarters.
After all, did not life
Originate from darkness itself?