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Anna Jan 2
The first moment
You looked at me as if I was a muse
Your muse or just
An object to appreciate for hours
24 wouldn't be enough
So you put me inside a cage
With walls made of glass
So you could see me inside
And I wouldn't go away
I tried hard but didn't matter
What would you do to escape
From a maniac painter?

Eyes over me
And suddenly I felt
The desire you had on my body
The curiosity of how did it feel
To touch it
Or how I smelled
Would it be like the rose you showed me
In your garden
She was pretty but
You said to me I was the new
The newest definition of beauty
And that you wished you have met me before
I definitely prayed that it never happened
And if God could hear me down there
Would he set me free?

I had a mother
A father
A family and friends
A life and plans
But none of that mattered
In days I'd be just
A human painting
Hanging on the wall.
Anna Jan 2
You
It has been difficult
Worse than climbing guava trees
And I don't know if the reward is that good
It's like breathing underwater
And honey, I'm not a mermaid
As much as I wanted to
It was you who dragged me to the bottom of the sea.

But hello, you
Waving with a new smile on your face
Of someone who's not to blame
I wish that could erase
Every bad thing you put me through.
It's the second day of the year, fellows
  Dec 2019 Anna
Charles Bukowski
during my worst times
on the park benches
in the jails
or living with
******
I always had this certain
contentment-
I wouldn't call it
happiness-
it was more of an inner
balance
that settled for
whatever was occuring
and it helped in the
factories
and when relationships
went wrong
with the
girls.
it helped
through the
wars and the
hangovers
the backalley fights
the
hospitals.
to awaken in a cheap room
in a strange city and
pull up the shade-
this was the craziest kind of
contentment

and to walk across the floor
to an old dresser with a
cracked mirror-
see myself, ugly,
grinning at it all.
what matters most is
how well you
walk through the
fire.
Anna Dec 2019
You were there quietly observing
Like a shadow in a empty wall at the midnight street
I saw your poem and i read it over and over till reach a word
The word made me ponder
If that was a poetry made by you
Then I found out
My true lover was a poet
Like me
And I finally discovered why was I
In love at first place
Your words weren't actually threw in lines of a poem
That I thought I saw in a sleepless night
They were threw in your eyes
In fact, emerging from them
Swimming in the brown of your iris
And I understood why it felt like home
Since I saw it the first time
You were broken, hurted and messed
Partly like me
But the truth was mine
And for no one else.
Here we go with another slepless night
Anna Dec 2019
I was drowning in the dark sea
In the sea of mermaids
Found myself staring
At the strong tides
Shocking at me
Taking me.

But then there I was in the lonely island
Shining sand and hot sun over me
Water bathering my toes
Cold as my feelings
My heart hurted
But there
I was.
My end of year is being terribly awful and I don't really know what else to say but I'm hoping and working for better days :)
Anna Dec 2019
This time I told myself
I wouldn't fall for your lies
Or your pretty big eyes
Neither your perfect weird smile
This time I won't wear your coat
When I feel bad
I won't hug myself thinking u're doing it
Won't bite hard the meat, angry
Won't cry either needing you
That's the old me
And I won't call you when I go needy
Because once in ever
I feel like I need myself
More than I need you.
Going thru an awful emotional state right now but this can't stop me from doing awful poems as well lol happy xmas y'all
Anna Nov 2019
With the watercolor of the evening sky
I paint my failed memories
That insist on looking for
In my mind, a space to allocate.

With the colors of the mountains
From lighter to darker green
I fill my lungs, let them inflate
I kick out the old air as a chance to change.

I don't hold hurt or grudge inside me
I know it will burn like fire
Flare I call soul.

Like water, I let them go
And I wash my bones and flesh in an attempt to purify
The evil they insist on keep inside me.
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