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Jan 2021 · 311
What's In Your Heart?
She must have
The largest heart
For I have been pouring into it liters of love
As of four years now
And it still has not been filled.
Is that it?

Or has she no heart at all?
Perhaps I'm pouring my love aimlessly into her blood
But blood flows to her feet, blood moves through her mind
She does not show it.
Could she be bloodless? All pale and porcelain?

No, I think her heart
Must be filled with holes.
Through which the love I pour,
Stems through.

If she'd just let me in...
Maybe I could mend it.
And if I fail,
I'd like my love back, please.
Thank you.
Jan 2021 · 1.1k
Lovingly Barred
If this infinite cage
Means your undying love
Then give me the key.

Sure, I'm pretty on the eyes
But don't shade mine,
I need to see.

I've told you before
To let go,
to set me free

You say I don't understand.
But if I want to know
I've got to flee.

I don't want your love,
I want wings.
Don't clip them, let me be.

I'll be home by high tea.
Anyone can lie.
I'm not coming home.
I've seen mine, now accept your reality.
Jan 2021 · 915
Fireworks
It all started in my second-story room.
A quiet summer night, not a single sound,
And then a loud boom.

I looked out the window for a better view
And rushed down to the kitchen, out the patio door, and onto the deck
Because what I saw in the sky reminded me of you
A small chill nipped at my neck, and I wondered,
Could you be remembering me too?

Because with every reverberation a star shot through the sky.
A shimmering burst, like a fiery blossom, every one of its blooms.
But it lingers for just a moment, and then it disappears.

Remember when we believed that if we swung high enough we might be able to fly?
Remember when we thought we could be artists and authors by just the age of sixteen?
Now all we do is sit and sigh, waiting on the Wifi,
Telling ourselves that the dreams we had were just unachievable little schemes.

They say you moved to Spain.
Three years ago, I heard.
Tell me, did that rid you of your pain?
And don’t lie, because I know, behind closed doors for your mother you cry, because Cancer had her killed.

And I might have found a lover.
And you’ve probably found another.
And we might feel fine as of now, but someday,
Just like the pyrokinetic flowers that bombard the night sky,
My memories of you will fade away.
I just wanted to say goodbye.
Jan 2021 · 560
Catch Me
You can probably catch me
f
          a
                    l
             l
     i
          n
            
                g  
                     for another

                     one of your lies.
But you won't, you never do.
Jan 2021 · 841
Minimalist
We were watched, making love last night
By her walls, painted plain and white.
I want to tell her,
If you love me, love me better,
You're doing it all wrong.
You just strung a dozen words together,
I wouldn't call it a song.
She says she's afraid to be alone
Fine, I guess I'll lead her along.
I'm not that cruel and
You're not very strong.
Four white, watching walls, night after night...
I don't think we can go on.
Jan 2021 · 611
Love Died of the Plague
She says her lover's died in the plague
She buried him already,
Before you came
Last night, stars bright,
Glinting off her metal *****.

It'd be a disrespect, to uncover the body,
They shrug and say,
Poor widow, lover died of the plague,
And at such a young age.

But check her closet now, don't be afraid,
See the kitchen knife there?
Love's red on its blade.
She said it was the plague
Jan 2021 · 503
His Broken Angel
There’s an angel you know,
He used to say.
An angel in my mind,
And in my heart.
And though its colors have been
Stripped away by Time,

It likes to sing,
He used to say.
And play the harp
Without any rhythm,
Without any flow.

And the world, it was so cruel
To tell him
The rhythm his angel played was a pain
And slowly that song,
The song of the harp, of the angel;
It began to fade.

And I asked him, though I knew he would not respond,
Was there anything I could have done?
Done to keep his angel,
His broken, beautiful angel.
The one that he had preserved in between the Sunday paper.

The Sunday paper, so very grim.
No one would care to look behind the print,
No one would ever find him.

But those fools!
Those terrible, horrible fools!
They came and tore off each and every one of the sheets,
Tore all the skin from his bones!
They took his angel and they broke him.
They took his heart.
They took my home.

And I know he won’t respond
For his eyes are closed,
He breathes
No more.

I know. I know
There was an angel once.
Right there, where there was once a pulse.
It used to sing,
And play the harp.
Without any rhythm
And without any flow.
This was originally an Ekphrastic poem but I can't upload images here. Sorry it's so long
Jan 2021 · 765
Father
Former lover of my mother:
Father,
You are free
to leave.
Lock the doors,
Don't take
the key.
Sure, drown in debt we may, but
They won't stay
sinking in sadness,
I will stop
Rising only in rage.
Jan 2021 · 458
Not Trending
She lives in a world
Where the rich stay rich,
Get richer.
The poor stay poor,
Get shot.

She is in the middle,
Knocking door to door.
Take me in, take me home
Make me your home.
Get lost.

She wants to ink her life out, in dramatics.
Wants it made on screen,
Because no one reads ink, anymore.
An impossible dream.
For without ink reading, there will be no screen.

In the middle
No one knows
Who they are
No one knows
Who you are.
Now get lost.
MAKE YOURSELF by Traveler has been trending for more than a month now.
Dec 2020 · 135
Tasting Time
Loving you
It will take me a long while
But when you ******* lips,
The love will no longer be bitter, no longer vile and lying,
You will taste sweet, sugary time.
Dec 2020 · 801
MDMA
My Dearest Molly Anne,
I hope you are now satisfied
With the sinking bags under my eyes and
The empty gap between my thighs, I hope
You know I can no longer sleep
Without you to rock me through the slow-rolling lake,
And sing your song of a thousand sheep.
You've started throwing
Thick red waves into my sink and
Messed with my ability to think and
Darling, you pull me
Under miles and miles of freezing sea
And you take and you take,
Never satisfied.
Nov 2020 · 441
Whole Holes
Hello, I'm not doing very well,
I think to myself.
I'd like to tell
You but my every apple, every cell,
Has been gutted and cored and you look so whole,
So pretty, such glow.
Hello? You're so nice on the eyes that
I never want you to know
The way I bleed through a shattered heart because these shards
Would poke holes
Through your sweet, sugar-glass wings,
Wings that could be delightfully clipped and pinned in a glass box
But I'd like to see you fly
Because it’d peal my dying, gutted mind from
All the empty apples inside
This holed up soul.
Nov 2020 · 540
Knit Thoughts
She says,
"You should know, dear
"The world doesn't stutter when it walks,
"Not the way you
"Stumble through your thoughts." And
I wish I could untie
The spool of my mind
But I
Keep feeding it thread,
Hoping it will spill out my mouth in
A rainbow scarf
Written in place of the 26-page history project due Monday
Nov 2020 · 384
Hazy
Momma what’s a life in shadows?
She asks the moon, because momma’s long gone.
Are they pretty, all faceless and shifting?
Or are they h a z y ?
Does the running woman in the rain believe herself a bird?
Where’s her flock momma?
Is she l o n e l y ?
Lost about the stone’s pure grain and glory?
I’m sorry you’ve got
To share yours with the sun.
Does he know, momma?
Does the sun know
About the shadows?
Maybe if he’d come down
He could keep them c o m p a n y.
I would
If I could.
Momma what’s a life in shadows?
Nov 2020 · 127
Empty Tears
I
Cannot cry on my own.
Sadness will pour through my pores but
My eyes stay dry which is why
I keep a list of songs,
3 pages long,
To which I pretend to relate,
To which I scream and let dry sobs ricochet
In my chest.
It's much like permission, because I've told myself--
I have been told
--That I am not sad.
That I do not cry, there is nothing to cry about.
Not the empty wounds in my soul, not the hole in my heart.
Compared to the rest, I don't have it too bad.
See I cannot cry on my own.
So I weep through another, and I know it hurts
The both of us
But without the outlet, I feel I might die so, so horribly.
And I've got to survive
To tell a story, my empty story, that will awe the rest.
Nov 2020 · 1.1k
2nd Place
The manic pixie dream girl wouldn't fall for you
So you fell for the poisonous girl in the red dress instead,
Thinking they were the same.
And they're quite similar, really, all mad and free.
But the difference between pixie dream girl and me
Is that she is sweet.
She'll do what she wants: She might love you, she might leave you.
Gently. Softly.
I am not so sweet, not so gentle, not so soft.
I will leave you, I won't love you, and you will come crawling back.
I want you to love me until you cry
And I want you to cry for me like a dying man for breath,
A starving man for a meal,
A soaked man for the sun,
And a deserted man for rain and
Even then
I'll leave you again, crawling through the sand.
All that, just because I can.
Dandelion
Seeds
Flock through the sky like
Silky little faeries and he knows he’s
Looking out a window when he longs
To be out
Side-- lying side by side with the flower beds that he wished existed out
Side of his mind There’s a
A little pecking that tells him the clock is
Going tick
Tock
Tick
Tock tick ticktick
Like the patter of rain against a mound of
Wet
Dirt
On which he’d
Like to sing his song---
His Haywire Song,
When the drizzle cast
Rainbows on the chipped auburn wood
Through the gold that pooled
In the pocket
Of shining sky, and he’d write without
Worry of the breeze that might run its fingers through the pages
Of his book and he’d smile through the sweat for
Three months if only he
Weren’t
So anxious of its end.
May 2020 · 448
A One-Sided Love
Honey, I hope
You never know
How I long to love you
Back.
May 2020 · 103
Modern Misogyny
It's funny, they say
Can't you take a joke?
It's funny until
You realize that the most powerful man in the country can admit to ****** assault on live television, and people will wave it off, calling it locker room talk,
Because locker room talk is okay, they'll say
It's funny until
You're still 16 and walking back home from school, only to be howled at the way savage dogs bark and wave their tongues at the sight of fresh meat.
Well you're ugly anyway, they'll say
It's funny until
You're a liar for standing up for yourself and calling for a change
What do you mean? There is no gap in pay,
That's what they'll say.
It's funny until
Your own father **** shames you for wearing shorts in the summertime because the boys won't be able to take your eyes off of you.
It's not that warm, you can deal with it for a day, they'll say.
What about the men? I ask
What about them? With their bare chests and shorts and their jeans that hang oh so low,
Low,
Low on their hips?
Tell me why a man who sleeps with 6 women is throned by society where a woman who trusts the wrong man with nothing but an image is a *****.
Tell me, why did our teachers ask for 3 strong boys to lift the table while we were being taught that harassment was nothing but an expression of endearment when it was issued by men, fueling thousands of abusive relationships?
And tell me why showing skin is taken as a plea for ****** advances on a woman.
Did the words escape my mouth?
Did you not understand me when I did speak? When my lips formed the word "stop" and traced them over and over a thousand times the way a spiral drawing is formed?
The downward spiral that would soon become my life, and somehow you'd hit me with a line about how you
"Banged three drunk ******* at the party last night"
And laugh when I don't, because it's "just a joke"
Sure, it's funny
Until you live like a woman
Because when you're a woman, you start to realize the harsh reality behind **** jokes and locker talk and compliments from strangers on the streets
It's funny until it's not
Until you realize where your country is headed, and what it means for you as a still 16-year-old girl
It's funny until it's terrifying.
Apr 2020 · 108
I Remember
I remember
The sun shining through the trees
Gold flakes dancing over the green of the leaves
A book propped up between scabby knees

I remember
The song of a violin
The smell of paint
The small soldier made of tin
The resin free of taint
Euphoria induced by the greatest win

I remember
Hours of contemplation
Curses thrown around
A moment of hesitation
A purpose, lost and never found
The glare of the blade

I remember
The light of the full moon
The fireworks that seemed to grow by the bloom
Your hand in mine
Listening to the sky’s every wail and whine
The slightest drizzle of rain
And we were insane
Oh, but we were fine.
We were fine.

I remember
Traces of tears
Victory over fears
Youth thrown away only to be redeemed
A thousand realities
So wild even I could have never dreamed.

— The End —