I cannot process a heartbreak that I have yet to begin.
Not a lover, but a friend that left my heart in two.
15 years of memories, laughs, secrets, and sleepovers.
From grade 3, yet you still found it in your heart to leave.
Do you know how it feels? Acerbic.
I just tried to show you the red flags yet he convinced you that I was one instead.
You chose a man that cares for nothing more than getting in your pants, over a friend that only wants you to be safe
Was it easy for you to give us up?
You made the decision so suddenly that the knife of numbness is still stuck in my heart.
I'm scared of what I'll feel once I try to remove it.
For now it's fear of what will happen when you're left with just him.
I look at myself and wonder if I'm a bad person for letting you stay.
Then I look at pictures of you and remember you decided to drop me.
Yet I still pose the the question "Am I the *******?"
Based off of 15 years of friendship down the drain faster than water from a sink. Also inspired by the title of the subreddit "Am I The *******"
It lies to us
Car accident caused death
No, a bullet did people!
HE was fresh in life
That women at least is arrested
for taking his life with a bullet
when he was fresh with life
I don't know intentions
behind the worst ending
when a boy was fresh with life
Hopefully I see him above
when my time has come
when he was fresh with life
I miss him
that boy was encouraging
fresh in life
and only 15
Today at school they told us my friend died in a car accident when the news clearly stated he was shot by a women
Hopefully it was painless
Miss you bro
You don't have to do anything special for special occasions,
because normal is the most precious kind of special.
5 months ago today,
Was the first time i fell for you
But things didn't go as planned and we had to say goodbye
And i can safely say now,
That I'm finally over you
That I'm no longer holding onto you
Before a breath in, it is there—
muggy, swampy, heavenly.
Before a barefoot step outside, sweat folds
into the skin and won’t let go
that time they write about
is upon us.
Consider this the preface
to a 19th summer.
Where you sneak around
drinking sub-par humid beer,
stolen from the forgotten bucket left outside.
The June when you finally get to see
what all the fuss is about—
a sweaty push and pull you’ve wondered about
Freedom is before you,
released from the shackles of high school,
from a love that came too quickly,
and refused to leave.
get on that train,
into that car that you can finally touch;
do things with that boy you don’t love.
Home has never felt more like home
than when you’re on the porch,
venturing into a midnight
that is dripping with warmth
and the knowledge that never again
could you feel this young
and this old.
I cant keep my hands from shaking when I write about you.
I get nervous, and I stutter when I speak to you.
I'm always scared that we're drifting miles apart,
and what ***** me up most is knowing that neither of us want the distance.
I think I miss you more clearly when I write about you.
I keep listening to the songs that you gave me too.
you look so cute in your smile.
I know that sounded weird.
The truth is I get a very honest tug at the corners of my lips when I see you.
I know that what I'm about to say will sound sad and pathetic,
but I practically live for the hug you give me at the end of the day.
You'll probably never read this anyway.
I just really hope that tonight goes well.
I found this in my note book a couple days ago and it was dated 3/15.
Maybe I should start doing homework,
I just wrote eight finished drafts.
I have an arm full of words and ink,
That I just made in class.
What else should I be doing?
Is the question mostly asked.
But I'll just copy her history notes,
I really need to get some sleep.
I'm writing a small poem every day about how I feel or the world around me. This is #15
that hinders you
would be forever you
a lie and never the truth