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Ashwin Kumar Oct 23
Dear Patti, it has been three years
Since you left us
A lot of things have happened
Many more have changed
Yet, never can I forget you at all
Always, did you stand tall
As the head of our family
Under you, were we all happy
You were the kindest family member
Your sheer compassion, will I forever remember
My friends were your friends
No relationship with you ever had an end
Really, were you the height of altruism
Through you, did God speak humanism
You have appeared, in countless dreams of mine
When you were alive, never did I feel alone
At times, when all hope seemed lost
You reminded me of my best
Thus, did I develop resilience
Very well, could you understand my silences
Throughout my life, were you with me
The good me as well as the bad me
Your goodness had absolutely no limits
Yet, rarely did you sugarcoat things
Every time, did you speak your mind
And let me know what I had to amend
In order to become a better human being
To you, could one go on listening
And learn a lot about the world
In spirit, never were you old
Tremendous courage, strength and determination
Provided you the ammunition
To go on working, in spite of your numerous health issues
Now, badly do I need a box of tissues
Let me say it once more
Never can I forget you at all, Dear Patti
Rest, not in peace, but in power!
Remembering my maternal grandmother "Kalyani Patti"; who had left for her heavenly abode 3 years ago.
Ashwin Kumar Oct 2023
At a time when I was held prisoner
By my shy nature
Especially when it comest to talking with girls
You put your best foot forward
In order to break the ice
Which was doing its best
To try and freeze me to death
As though I were but in Antarctica
So, I thought you my friend
Mind you, an assumption it wasn't
You called me your best friend
Not once or twice
But many a time
You even called yourself my sister
A trusting person that I am
I took you at face value
Which was probably one of the biggest mistakes
Of my life in entirety
If Australia dominated cricket
You were my dominator
Your name stands for desire
And all you desired
Was getting your way
When it comest to anything and everything
You were such a drama queen
You put the Kardashians to shame
Only your "bestest friend" escaped
From your terrifying glare
Which burnest everything in its path
Much like Lord Shiva's third eye
You were always right
We were always wrong
Again, with a notable exception
Your precious little "bestest friend"
What he saw in you
Only God knowest
Marking you absent in the attendance register
Which was but my duty
Turned out to be a crime
Fouler than ****** itself!!
How dare I mark the "Queen" absent
Even if she were indeed absent!!
How dare I support Chennai Superkings
Even if I were but from Chennai
Not to mention, a huge fan of MS Dhoni!!
East or West, North, South Or Central
Mumbai Indians were always the best
All other teams were trash
You and your whims and fancies
Driveth all of us mad
Quicker than a tracer bullet
As Ravi Shastri would say
Even to this day
But you were my best friend
Not to mention, my sister!!
So mum I kept
As would a fiercely loyal dog
Even when ignored by its master
After our college days endeth
I stayed in touch
As would every friend in the world
In particular, a best friend
But best friend you were certainly not
I can forgive even an enemy
But not a friend who cuts me off
For the flimsiest reason in the world
To you, I was wrong
Though reality speaketh otherwise
But hey, why would I want to lose my best friend?
So did I apologise
Not once or twice
But many a time
Though for the kind of response I receiveth
Might I have spoken to the wall instead!!
After ages and ages
Cometh your response
As arrogant as James Potter in his school days
You showeth me your true face
Nothing but a jumped up rich Punjabi Brahmin
Who thinkest she were the best
In not just India
But the world in its entirety
Gone was your sweet tongue
In full display was a mini Bellatrix Lestrange
Ready to **** even her best friend
As the real Bellatrix did
With her cousin Sirius Black
Well, I would rather I died
Than maintain a friendship
With a cunning ***** like yourself
You deserve not
A single true friend in the world
Not even your "bestest friend"
You smashed my self-confidence
Into a billion little pieces
Pieces that I continue to pick up
Even to this day
Something I could but have avoided
Had I not taken you up
On your offer of friendship
Which was but as fake
As the smile of a Kardashian
I endeth on this note
It is but a lesson to all
Not to get swayed by sweet tongues
Scratch beneath the surface
Then only showeth up the true character
Poem dedicated to my first female friend, who cut me off because of a comment on one of her Facebook photos.
Ashwin Kumar Jan 7
Never is it too late, to love
Even if you have to move
From place to place
Without even setting a base

I may be thirty four years old
But that leaves me not, in the cold
Not to boast, but do I have a heart of gold
And never will I fold
Even when tested beyond my limits
Because I simply don't take ****
Not from anyone, not even family
If you try to mess with me
For you, it's gonna end sadly
Not always, may I be free
But if I happen to love you
Always, will I make time for you

Never is it too late, to love
Especially if you have nothing to lose
Coming to me, I've had a bad marriage
Which has done its share of damage
When it cometh to my mental health
However, fine is my physical health
Not to mention, do I have a good job
And afraid not I'm, to sob
Whenever I hit a rough patch
Because, usually does it end up making me a stronger person
Even If I find not a match
On any of those ******* dating apps
After all, is life full of lessons
For example, never blindly trust Google Maps!
See, I have a decent sense of humour!
So what If I lack glamour?
Sound am I, when it cometh to character
And never have I been a cheater

I may be thirty four years old
But rarely am I bored
Because, do I have the heart of a child
Which can make me wild
From time to time
Never do I give a dime
As to what the society thinks
Sometimes, do I find it difficult to blink
But if you really care for me
You should just let it be
Because it ain't nothing but a quirk
And if I truly care for you
Never will I keep you in the dark
That is love for you

Never is it too late, to love
Especially if you've already been through love
To me, has it happened twice
The first occasion was rather nice
A classic case of unrequited love
Which I can forget not, even now
Because it truly made me happy
Coming to the second occasion
It was something that I'd rather forget in a hurry
Because it brought a lot of tension
To me as well as my family
Not to mention, one of my best friends
My wife was worse than a fiend
Because she pretended to love me madly
While the reality was
That, about me she gave not a ****
Being slippery as moss
Truly was our marriage a sham
However, battle-hardened am I now
And mind not, going slow
Because, never is it too late, to love

Never is it too late, to love
Even if you've been through a lot
Because, as long as your heart is in the right place
Never will love become a race
If you have family and good friends
Eventually will there be an end
To the search for love
Because there will be someone for sure
Of course, hardships you may have to endure
But in the end, you will get there
Do not worry, dear
Surrender yourself to God
Because he'll never leave you in the cold
Finally, even if you get old
Never is it too late, to love!
Poem on my musings about love and time.
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2022
After a rather enjoyable Saturday
Which marked the return
Of my mother and grandfather
After a fortnight's stay in Chennai
I was really looking forward
To some R&R on "precious" Sunday
It started promisingly enough
Getting up as late as nine o'clock
Enjoying a hot cup of filter coffee
Prepared by my dear mother
Solving Wordle in three attempts
Watching photos and videos of trains
Playing my all-time favourite game 'Choices'
Enjoying a rather delicious brunch
Again prepared by Amma
Followed by my customary afternoon siesta
Which lasted more than two hours
Just as I was beginning to think
That I couldn't have asked for a better Sunday
I had to begin the rather tedious process
Of filing my income tax returns
Fortunately, Amma was there to support me
And take me through the entire process
Which involved numerous calculations
Some of which, were more confusing
Than even the questions asked in IIT-JEE!
After nearly two hours of breaking our heads
And cursing the Finance Minister profusely
Which, by the way, was entirely my doing
The returns were finally filed
And the tax duly paid
As I heaved a sigh of relief
Having gotten a huge monkey off my weary back
It dawned on me
That tomorrow is Monday
And I have to go to office as well
Which involves getting up as early as six o'clock
Followed by a commute in the dreaded Mumbai local
With its super dense crush load
And once I reach office
I have to share a tiny cabin
With my boss and his wife
And endure a lecture or two
About my recent lack of success at work
In this rather claustrophobic setting
Oh boy, I'll never get a break, will I?
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2022
Oh wisdom teeth, why do you hate me so much?
What have I ever done to you?
It is thanks to you
That my life has turned topsy-turvy
You should never have been born
For all you do, is cause pain
Metaphorical as well as literal
It was ten years ago
When I was first advised by a dentist
To finish you off
I let it slide at that time
And decided to give you a chance
Four years later
I was given the same suggestion
By another dentist
That too in a different city
Yet again, I decided to spare you
And four more years later
History repeated itself
Thus, you turned out to be luckier
Than a cat with nine lives
But you never made use of all that luck, did you?
On the other hand
You had the nerve
To bite the hand
That has been feeding you for so long
Thus, I had no choice
But to send you back to your Maker
Where you truly belong
Of course, you wouldn't surrender without a fight
The anesthetic injection was painful enough
But little did I expect
That you would continue to haunt me
Even after you were gone
For good
I had to take painkiller after painkiller
And even that was not enough
For monsters like you
Who made sure
That every meal was an ordeal by fire
And so was every phone conversation
Oh wisdom teeth, why do you hate me so much?
Self-explanatory!!!
Ashwin Kumar Jul 18
One of the truest friends, you are
Selfish, are you never
Greatly, do I value our relationship
And always, will I clap
For anything and everything you achieve
Because, you make me believe
That every problem in the world can be solved
If we thoroughly apply our mind
You are a very kind soul
And strongly do you feel
For anyone and everyone
Being associated with you is really a boon!

One of the truest friends, you are
For your family and friends, deeply do you care
You were also a wonderful colleague
At that time, was my ego getting big
But thanks to you, did I manage to mellow down
And learn a valuable lesson
Something that I will remember forever
You know, you can seriously make a good teacher!!

One of the truest friends, you are
You and Vivek make a rock-solid pair
It was a great honour to visit your home
Both of you are truly gems
When it comes to character and personality
No wonder, does everyone love your family
Especially your lovely little children
From whom, is there a lot to learn!!

One of the truest friends, you are
And will be forever
May Jesus bless you and your family
With every bit of love, happiness, peace and prosperity!!
Dedicated to Rene, a close friend and former colleague of mine.
Ashwin Kumar Jan 2022
It was a beautiful Sunday morning
A day after Christmas
Barely had I drifted
Into a gentle slumber
Full of colourful fantasies
Involving a vehicle with thousand wheels
Than I was jolted awake
By the sheer cacophony
Of my mobile alarm
It was just the crack of dawn
And it took me a minute to realise
Why I had to be up and about
At such an odd hour
That too on a Sunday
A massive trek lay ahead of us
After a hot water bath
Followed by a cup
Full of piping hot filter coffee
We were ready to head out
In a medium-sized car
After a long drive
It was time for a break
In order to recharge our batteries
With a delightful breakfast
Full of South Indian delicacies
After yet another marathon drive
Senjikottai finally welcomed us
With open arms
After exploring the Kalyana Mahal
With its artfully decorated interiors
It was time for the real challenge
The trek up the mountains
That loomed over us
It was a daunting task, no doubt
But certainly not an impossible one
Especially if we stuck together
After all, we were family
And what does family do
But stick together
Especially when presented with a challenge?
And so the climb began
Through a winding and twisting path
Full of sand and rocks
A path with more twists
Than an Agatha Christie ****** mystery
The Sun God showed no mercy on us
With every step we took
Sweat poured out in buckets
And that was not all
The steps were so uneven
That it was a miracle
To be able to cover even a hundred metres
Without slipping on the way
And there were more hurdles
In the form of monkeys
A whole family of them
Spread around the mountains
And lying in wait
To nick some food and water
From the loaded bags
That we carried
On our already weary backs
In order to keep the monkeys at bay
We additionally had to carry sticks
Thus adding to our burden
By the time we were halfway up
The sheer weight of the task
Was already beginning to tell on us
Our limbs were aching
Our palms were shaking
Our heads were throbbing
And I wanted nothing more
Than to go home
And crash on my bed
However, we were wise enough
To take short breaks here and there
During which we refuelled
Taking gulps of water
To fill our parched throats
Moreover, the view of the countryside
Was getting better and better
And it was this
That ultimately propelled us
To carry on and finish the task
So on we marched
Sweating and panting
Slipping and stumbling
But never giving up
Till we reached the very top
And there stood before us
Gingee Fort, in all its glory
With a stunning countryside
Full of lakes and hills
Trees, roads and buildings
A sight fit to dazzle
Even the most cynical of skeptics
A sight fit to melt a heart of stone
As we basked in the glory
Of an arduous and extremely tiring
But ultimately successful climb
I felt incredibly thankful
For deciding to undertake this trek
For it was one of my best moments of 2021
With family and relatives on 26 Dec 2021.
Ashwin Kumar Jan 2022
It is irritating beyond belief
That you have absolutely no control
Over what you can remember
And what you can forget
Especially if you are autistic
I want to remember so many things
Essential tasks, passwords, birthdays
I want to forget so many things
People, mistakes, failures
However, Fate works in mysterious ways
Most of the time, it so happens
That you forget what you want to remember
And remember what you want to forget
In the past, I have been guilty
Of losing a number of things
Calculators, earphones, pen drives
I have been equally guilty
Of forgetting as many things
Essential tasks, passwords, important dates
However, over the last few years
I have made some progress
I am much less forgetful
Than I used to be
Because I make notes in my diary
And set up reminders on my phone
However, as mentioned before
Fate works in mysterious ways
Especially if you are autistic
Just as I thought
That I had established some control
Over what I can remember
I have started forgetting again
And this time, there is no turning back
Fairly self-explanatory.
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2022
I have been working hard
For hours and hours
Days and days
Weeks and weeks
Combing every portal
Sending hundreds of mails
Speaking to hundreds of candidates
And yet I see no light
At the end of this extremely dark
And insanely long tunnel
I have sacrificed so much
Be it watching cricket
Or playing mobile video games
Or reading books
Or going for walks
Or exercising
Or even
Spending quality time with my family
Don't get me wrong
I love the work I'm doing
It is, after all, a wonderful learning experience
And will hold me in good stead
For the years to come
But surely you've got to admit
That I could use an extra pair of hands
To say that the company is short-staffed
Would be the understatement of the year
How long do you expect me to go on like this
Doing the work of at least two people?
After all, I am a human
Not a robot
So far, I may have been on the right track
But at some stage
I am bound to crack
And when I do
It is not only I who would suffer
But the company as well
You wouldn't want that, would you?
So, please hire more people soon
We need all the support we can get
And while allocating work
Please ensure that we don't end up biting more than we can chew
After all, we do love our work
But it is equally important
That the work loves us in turn
Dedicated to my boss.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 2023
Your expressions can ****
Before one can even utter the words "Avada Kedavra" !!
Your eyes sparkle with an intensity
That can melt even boulders
Your smile is filled with a dazzling light
Which is so bright
That it can even turn Hell into Heaven
As we are often told
"Laughter is the best medicine"
Well, your laugh is so divine
That it can even bring people back from the dead
Your sense of fashion is an art in itself
And can even put London and Paris in the shade
Most of all, you gave up a career in medicine
In order to pursue your dreams
With a courage that would have made Godric Gryffindor proud
I can't wait to watch you on the big screen
Because there is absolutely no one
Who can do justice to the character of Poonguzhali
With such a silken grace
As I am sure you will
Malayalam actress who plays the role of "Poonguzhali" in Ponniyan Selvan 2.
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2020
Music is a wonderful healer
It has soothed many a troubled soul
And cheered up many a depressed soul
There is something in music
That endears itself, to one and all
Something irresistible, so much so
That it feels, frankly divine
Something that distinguishes it
From all other forms of art
There is no greater joy
Than watching a master musician at work
Maestros are one of a kind
Around them, is an aura so powerful
That nothing can stop them
From weaving their magic
Slowly, but surely
And leaving us spellbound
At the sheer symmetry of it all
And we cannot speak about maestros
Without speaking about Harris Jayaraj
His music takes us into a whole new world
A world full of hope
A world full of infinite possibilities
And most importantly
A world where we feel liberated
Whether it be the softness of the instruments
Or the extremely catchy tunes
Or the clever choice of singers
There is no doubt
That his music has cast a spell on us all
Of course, there are haters
Some of whom call him a copycat
However, actions speak louder than words
From Minnale to Kaakha Kaakha
From Ghajini to Unnale Unnale
From Vaaranam Aayiram to Ko
From Nanban to Anegan
From Yennai Arindhaal to Kaappaan
Harris has delivered hits time and again
His records speak for themselves
And what's more
We can love or hate Harris
But we can't deny
That his music affects us all
For better or for worse
Poem dedicated to my favourite Indian music composer - Harris Jayaraj.
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2023
You are seen as weird
People often call you "Loony"
But they couldn't be more wrong
Yes, you are indeed different
But then, every individual is unique
And I like you as you are
With all your pros and cons
Yes, you may believe in things
Which do not really exist
But then, who doesn't?
What truly matters
Is the fact that you are a beautiful human being
With a heart of gold
Who doesn't judge anyone
Sees people as they are
Doesn't shy away from speaking uncomfortable truths
Is modest to a fault
And last but not the least
Values friendship above everything else
You know, I can relate to you
I am also different
And got bullied for that
Just as you did
However, your mental strength is remarkable
After losing your mother at a very young age
That too due to a freak accident
You have shown the courage and fortitude
Not to mention, resilience and tenacity
To carry on with your life
Do your best to excel at magic
Display the natural curiosity and aptitude for learning
Which is expected of every Ravenclaw
Develop and sustain friendships
And finally, put your life on the line
In order to try and make the world a better place for all
You are not only a true Ravenclaw
But also possess the courage, nerve and daring of a Gryffindor
And the loyalty and sense of justice of a Hufflepuff
You only lack the cunning and ambition of a Slytherin
Not to mention, you were kidnapped and held hostage by Death Eaters
That too for a few months
And somehow emerged almost unscathed
After such a traumatic experience
You really are an incredible witch
Please remain the way you are
No matter what people say
And I will be a fan of yours
Until, as Neville would say, "Hell freezes over"
One of my favourite Harry Potter characters
Ashwin Kumar Mar 14
You are a brilliant poet and writer
And a terrific activist and orator
On the head, do you hit the nail
Every time without fail!

You speak what people do not want to hear
Which makes me grin from ear to ear
Never do you sugarcoat
Nor do you showboat
Supreme, is your clarity of thought
A lot of battles, must you have undoubtedly fought
And when it cometh to your imagination
To the winds, do you throw caution
The way you repeatedly attack our Brahminical patriarchy
Leaves us all under a spell
Because your writing is so fiery
That even the Sun can't hold a candle to it!!

Your English is flawless
So brilliantly do you assess
The problems in our society
Incomparable, is your brutal honesty
Not to mention, your Tamil is a work of art
Very well, have you played your part
In fighting caste and gender inequality
To all of us, do you represent Hope
Especially in these times of adversity
Never do you sit down and mope
When the going gets tough
Rather, do you tell yourself
"Enough is enough!"
And bounce back with a bang
Loud enough to silence your detractors
Unquestionable, is your character!!

To the literary world, are you an invaluable asset
Because, there ain't nothing you can't achieve
Above all, you make us believe
That we can fight the system
And most importantly, WIN!!
Poem dedicated to Meena Kandasamy - an author, poet and activist whom I admire greatly.
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2023
It's always good to make friends, wherever you go
After all, every new place has its set of challenges
And in order to overcome them
It's better to have someone at your side
As they say, you don't have to do everything on your own
Well, making friends may not seem all that difficult
But keeping them is a different matter altogether
There must be some common ground
The place where you meet
The company where you work
The college where you study
Your hobbies, passions etc.
And I can go on and on
However, the point is
You and your friend must be compatible with each other
Being an introvert, I don't have many friends
However, the few I do have
Can be entrusted with almost anything in the world
This poem is about one of them
We met as colleagues, six years ago
And hit it off almost from the word go
Thanks to a few common interests
Such as cricket, movies, food etc.
We even went to a storytelling event
Where he was given a chance to take the mic
And spoke about me and my passion for trains
What I particularly like about him
Is that he is very easygoing
And rarely gets angry or upset
Even when dealing with cranky clients
And he had a whole lot of them
Every client was a story in itself
We would bond while trashing these clients
Often over a cup of cutting chai
Down at the cafeteria
As the months sped by
We grew closer
Finding more and more common ground
In the form of issues we faced at work
Especially the frequent salary delays
And non-payment of incentives
We always had lunch together
Except when either of us worked from home
Eventually, my friend shifted to Pune
But we stayed in touch on a regular basis
In fact, we met on at least five occasions
And continue to speak over the phone
Almost on a monthly basis
Even after he got married, about a year ago
He, in particular, makes it a point
To call me every now and then
And we exchange news
About our respective lives
This close friend of mine is proof
That you don't necessarily have to keep meeting people
In order to maintain friendships
Of course, it is always good to meet your friends
But sometimes, all you may need
If you're missing someone
Is a simple phone call
And in this case
Our calls are usually long
Long enough to ensure
That we sustain our friendship, no matter what
Poem dedicated to my friend and ex-colleague Rishi.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 2023
We have never actually met
I mean physically, of course
But we've got to know each other well
Over the course of six years
When we had our first conversation
I looked up to you, as a senior colleague
In fact, I still do
Especially considering the way you handle certain clients
Who have given us a lot of trouble, over the years
And the way you manage your work
Given that you have to deal with a lot of family matters as well
Is nothing short of exemplary
However, you are not just my senior
You are a good friend of mine too
That's why I rant a lot
As far as work is concerned
Because I know you will listen and understand
And many a time, I find
That I feel much better
After sharing my issues with you
Of course, it works both ways
I am always ready to listen
When it is your turn to rant
Hopefully, it is only a matter of time
Before we eventually meet
Nevertheless, our relationship goes on to show
That it is definitely possible
For two people to be good friends
Without meeting each other face-to-face
Self-explanatory
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2023
When I started my MBA
I was looking forward to making new friends
And of course, excelling in academics
And thus redeeming myself
After my Engineering debacle
However, it never occurred to me
That I would fall in love
For the first time in my life
You changed everything
Right from our second meeting
I was drawn towards you
You were very shy
But in a good way
And of course, extremely sweet-natured
The kind of person who wouldn't hurt a fly
Though you didn't know much Tamil
In spite of being a Tamilian
Your English more than made up for that
You didn't speak a lot
However, when you did speak
You were able to articulate your thoughts exceedingly well
And though we never had a detailed conversation
Apart from our debate on the movie "Ra One"
It was always a pleasure to interact with you
And of course, listen to your captivating voice
Last but not the least
Your handwriting was so exquisite
That it had the capability
To transform the dullest subject
Into an extremely fascinating one
Anyway, I truly loved you
But I couldn't muster the courage
To ask you out
However, I don't have any regrets whatsoever
And regardless of where you are currently
I hope you are having the time of your life
Just one last thing
I am utterly gobsmacked
That you knew all along
Something that I could never guess
From the way you spoke to me
Or behaved with me in general
You are indeed an incredible lady
And I hope you remain the way you are
Because the world needs more people like you
Dedicated to a girl with whom I fell in love with, during my MBA
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2023
When I first met you
It was at the office
I took a liking to you instantly
And I guess the feeling was mutual
You were incredibly nice
And could go on talking
As though nothing could stop you
In fact, it felt as though we already knew each other
And that too for a few years
For some reason
I felt I could trust you with anything and everything
Therefore, it didn't come as a surprise
That we soon became good friends
As far as work was concerned
You were always very supportive and helpful
And I never ever felt bored
While having a conversation with you
Because you could speak on a number of topics
Work, family, politics
Travel, movies, food
The list goes on and on
Moreover, it helped that we had similar views
Especially when it came to politics
On the whole, it was an honour to work with you
Though you couldn't stay for long
Anyway, we have been keeping in touch
And you always read my poems
Something that I appreciate a lot
You are also a very loving mother
I'm sure your kids must be proud of you
Especially the way you strike a balance
Between family and work
I am really happy that we spoke recently
And that too for over twenty minutes
Something that we must do more often
As you yourself mentioned
Anyway, take care and let's catch up soon
And yes, please convey my regards to your family
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2023
You were my colleague
Until a few weeks ago
Whenever I came to office
It was your presence
That brought a smile to my face
After the exhausting commute from my home
By the dreaded Mumbai locals
You were a ball of energy
And I felt so comfortable with you
That it was as though I was interacting with a family member
We had an excellent rapport
And I truly enjoyed working with you
I can never forget our team lunch at Canto
And of course, the grand team dinner at TOIT
On both occasions, all of us had a wonderful time
However, it was always you
Who turned out to be the life of the party
You are sweet and innocent
And your laughter is so infectious
That it makes us forget all our worries
And live in the moment
You may not be my colleague now
But you are still a good friend of mine
And will always be
It would be great if we can catch up again soon
Meanwhile, I wish you all the very best
For your career as well as your personal life
And last but not the least
Please keep smiling, as always
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2023
I initially came to know you through Tamil
This was more than eight years ago
Since then, a lot has happened over the years
You and Tamil are one of my favourite couples
The understanding between the pair of you
Is deeper than the Pacific Ocean
And stronger than the Rock of Gibraltar
You are not only a very caring husband
But also a proud father
Of a very spirited child
Who is rather naughty
But at the same time, rather sweet and innocent
I am extremely thankful to you
For taking such good care of my best friend
But it's not just about Tamil
You yourself are a good friend of mine
Always supportive and encouraging
I can never forget the time
When you and Tamil were instrumental
In saving me from a disaster of a marriage
You are also extremely hardworking
And put your heart and soul into your profession
Please remain the way you are
Keep rocking and see you soon!
Dedicated to my friend Hari, who is the proud husband of my best friend Tamil.
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2023
We met about seven years ago
And I had the great pleasure
Of working with you
You were warm and friendly
As well as extremely helpful and supportive
Whenever I got stuck on a mandate
I knew I could turn to you for guidance
However, the best part was
You were uber cool
Nothing could ever shake you
And even if I struggled sometimes
You never pushed me to deliver
Something that I appreciated immensely
Of course, you were my Team Lead
But you are also a good friend of mine
Though it's been a very long time
Since we last met
We have been keeping in touch
Every now and then
You not only put up with my rants
But also advise me from time to time
Whether it be work or personal issues
I am also very happy
That you are now a mother
I'm sure you will do wonders
As a mother and a wife
And also as a HR professional
Please continue to be the amazing human being that you are
And I hope to catch up with you soon
Take care and wish you loads of happiness, love, good health and success
Poem dedicated to my ex-colleague and friend Rashmi
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2022
I know it's just been a week
But I'm already beginning to miss you
And I'm not the only one
You do make an impact
On anyone who has been lucky enough
To get to know you
Whether it be family or friends
Or maybe even total strangers!
Anyway, we've had some great times together
I shall never forget our trip to the UK
And the fun we had there
Especially the Wimbledon camping experience
Would you have believed me then
If I had told you
That you would end up returning there to study
In a matter of three years?
Mysterious indeed, are the ways
In which Fate works
Our trip to USA was equally memorable
Who will ever forget that iconic moment
When you identified a McDonald's cafe from the plane?
Nothing, absolutely nothing ever
Escapes those beady eyes of yours
This is one of the many things I love about you
We may not spend a lot of time talking to each other
But you understand me very well
Perhaps more than I understand myself
And I know that I can always count on you
Anyway, I am getting too sentimental
Have a good time out there
I'm sure you'll find new friends
In fact, as I write this
You seem to be making progress on that front already
Try to balance studies and housework as much as you can
And most importantly
Take care of yourself
Whatever problems you might face
Know that you're not alone
We have your back always, no matter what
It is your happiness
Rather than what course you do
Or what job you may find
That matters to us the most
So, on that note
Let me wish you all the very best
Take care and stay in touch
Miss you loads
Poem dedicated to my sister who left India for UK a week ago.
Ashwin Kumar May 2023
I've known you for close to two years
We've had a great rapport as colleagues
Though I am technically your senior
I've always seen you as an equal
In fact, we often think on the same lines
You've helped me out on numerous occasions
And in turn, I too have helped you
More times than I can count
I can never forget your words of encouragement
When I was going through a difficult phase last year
And after meeting you in person
We've learned a lot more about each other
For some reason, I feel I can tell you anything
Whether it be professional or personal
You are extremely cool and level headed
And capable of handling any situation
On top of that, you have a fun side as well
Which ensures that a conversation with you would never be boring
Not to mention, you've suffered quite a few losses
Which has made you battle-hardened
As far as I know
Nothing is impossible for you
You are also very warm and friendly
And thus talking to you
Feels like talking to a family member
You are not merely a colleague
But also a good friend and sister
Please be the way you are
And continue to do your very best
That's all I have to say for now
Poem dedicated to a colleague whom I meet everyday at office.
Ashwin Kumar Feb 2022
We have been in this relationship
For more than six years
For the first three years
You served me really well
Whether it be the network connectivity
Or the quality of calls
Or the mobile data
But since then, things have gone south
The calls started dropping
There were plenty of times
When I could hear the other person
But s/he could not hear me
And vice-versa
There were also plenty of times
When the other person's voice was muffled
Or worse, distorted
And finally, the mobile data was slower than a snail
Thanks to your disappointing service
My work was badly affected
And I lost a few candidates
But still I gave you a chance
As per your suggestion
I changed my Sim Card
And for a few months
It was smooth sailing
I thought we were on the right track
Alas, how wrong I was!
Every time there was an issue
You came up with all sorts of excuses
For instance, geographical reasons
And network settings
And whatnot!
Then the pandemic struck
Leaving you short-staffed
And your service suffered accordingly
So, I decided to wait
Until normalcy was restored
Thus, I gave you another chance
Unfortunately, as always
You failed to take it
And for the first time
You showed some attitude
This was really the last straw
And I have decided
That I have given you enough chances
And it is only a matter of time
Before I am finally done with you
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2022
You know how I work
You know the amount of work I put in
Every hour, every day
Every week, every month
It would be the easiest thing in the world
To slack off, for a change
Or work at a snail's pace
After all, I've worked with you
For a long, long time
Therefore, it would be easy for me to think
That I am indispensable
Or that I can take you for granted
But if I do that
Then I wouldn't be Ashwin
So, coming back to the point
You know I am overworked
In fact, we all are
You have even acknowledged it
At some point or the other
And are trying to set things right
By adding more people to the team
However, for some reason
Things have always ended up going south
At the eleventh hour
While I do appreciate your endeavours
What I would really like
Is for you to appreciate our efforts
On a regular basis
And try as far as possible
To ensure some balance in the workload
So that we don't end up biting more than we can chew
After all, a few people have recently left
You don't want to add to that number, do you?
So, please think twice
Before assigning any new mandates
Especially to someone who hasn't fully recovered from COVID yet
Dedicated to my boss
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2019
Every day, as the clock strikes ten
You march into the office
Swinging your arms back and forth
In a crude imitation of Herr ******
As the eyes of every employee
Focus on your cold, black ones
As if by magic
A deafening silence fills the office
As Hope turns into Despair
Trust turns into Betrayal
Confidence turns into Insecurities
Love turns into Hate
And Peace turns into Pieces

As your ringing voice fills the air
Resulting in a cacophony
Louder than those infernal firecrackers
Everybody's worst nightmare comes true
As you yell at your team
Mocking all their painstaking efforts
Dehumanizing them with casteist remarks
Your voice cuts into their feelings
Like a knife through butter
Leaving wounds so deep
That the scars shine brightly
For the rest of their lives

You are not an employer
You are a cruel, sadistic tyrant
Hiding behind the facade
Of a concerned maternal figure
However, as with all tyrants
The day will eventually arrive
When you are toppled
From your lofty throne
Your business will sink
Just as the Titanic did
You will be in huge debt
Your ill-gotten gains evaporating into thin air
As your erstwhile employees have their last laugh
It is you, who will be left
With wounds so deep
That the scars shine brightly
For the rest of your miserable life
A poem to my best friend's tyrannical boss. Note: I have taken a bit of inspiration from J.K.Rowling, the author of Harry Potter.
Ashwin Kumar Oct 2019
As I look out of the window
My head laid back against the cushion
Of my side lower berth
My eyes open wider and wider
As they gaze upon the surroundings
The trees, the bushes, the greenery
The mountains, the tunnels, the bridges
The surrounding railway lines, the crossing trains
It is a vivid, and most enchanting dream
However, all good things come to an end
All of a sudden, I am ****** back to reality
As I feel a tingling sensation
I swing around in alarm
And see a creepy little cockroach
Scuttle across the seat
Evidently having made its home here
As I angrily brush the insect aside
I keep my fingers crossed
Hoping against hope
That this is the exception to the rule
After all, hope springs eternal
However, as always, Murphy's law strikes
The little devil is soon followed
By its brother, sister, father and mother
As a family of these incorrigibly evil pests
Unleash a reign of terror
Such that, even the most diehard railfans
Vow never to seet foot in an Indian train again
Especially in a non-AC coach
Frankly, this is the last straw
That broke the hapless camel's back
Dear Railway Minister
You may introduce bullet trains
You may electrify the entire network
You may connect India with China
But, unless and until the day arrives
When we can travel in a clean train
Without the numbing and overpowering fear
Of these evil pests and rodents
Your words mean as much to us
As grass to a lion or tiger
A poem to vent my feelings after travelling in a Sleeper Class full of cockroaches today; albeit for a short distance
Ashwin Kumar Oct 2019
Are you a human being?
Or are you an agent of Satan?
Do you value human life?
Or do you consider it disposable?
Do you understand love?
Do you understand kindness?
Do you understand empathy?
If not, are you fit to run a company?
Are you fit to be a boss?
Are you fit to be an HR?
Are you fit to work at all?

You have been blinded
By your fanatical zeal for results
By your overpowering greed for money
By your insatiable lust for power
For you, employees are robots
Tailor-made for your animalistic needs
Which cannot be satisfied
By any sane human being
For the sake of your whims and fancies
Which change at the speed of light
Several innocent lives are being ruined
Today, it is the employees who are doomed
Tomorrow, it could be your husband
The day after, it may even be your daughter
And this vicious cycle will go on and on
With no end in sight
Therefore, for the sake of humanity
It is only just
That you are banished from Earth
Down to the all-consuming darkness of Hell
Where you will rot, for eternity
And the world shall be happier for it
The title is fairly self-explanatory!
Ashwin Kumar Apr 24
Ready am I, to make sacrifices for true love
For as long as I live
Spend less money, I can
Reduce my screen time, I can
Travel less, I can
Eat less sweet items, I can
Sleep less, maybe I can
Write less, maybe I can
However, there are certain things
On which I cannot compromise
Because I hate breaking promises
For me, is keeping my word everything!
For example, never can I change my character
After all, my principles are my anchors
Change my world views, I cannot
Show less love or affection, I cannot
Give up meat, I cannot
Stop travelling by train, I cannot
Compromise on my relationships with family or friends, I cannot
Irrespective of the gender
Because they are my bread and butter!!

Ready am I, to make sacrifices for true love
A lot, am I ready to give
My precious time, yes
My precious money, yes
My precious energy, yes
More confident, can I be
More assertive, can I be
More courageous, can I be
Smarter, can I be
Fitter, can I be
Humbler, can I be
More forgiving, can I be
Less hot-headed, can I be
Less stubborn, can I be
Less insecure, can I be
Less shy, can I be
However, the most important thing is to strike a balance
Find that middle path
Avoid extremes as far as possible
And last but not the least
It needs to be worth it!!
Poem on how much am I ready to sacrifice, in the event of falling in love.
Ashwin Kumar Dec 2022
Recruitment is an utterly thankless job
Especially if you are handling an Investment Banking role
That too when working in a startup
You spend hours and hours
Searching frantically for candidates
Who possess the requisite skills and experience
Followed by days and days
Speaking to a plethora of candidates
Facing rejection after rejection
Watching your own confidence nosedive
After almost every conversation
And then gritting your teeth and continuing to burn the midnight oil
After you finally manage to share a few relevant resumes
By the skin of your teeth
You breathe a sigh of relief
Knowing that your job is half done
Everything runs smoothly from thereon
Till the offer stage
When the candidate decides to back out
Having received a better offer elsewhere
And you are back to square one
However, you resume the search
With a renewed vigour
And put your heart and soul
Into finding a suitable replacement
Your efforts are duly rewarded
However, misfortune strikes again
The candidate develops cold feet
And gets retained by his present company
You have to go back to the drawing board, yet again
However, you refuse to give up
And work harder than ever
Determined to be third time lucky
Alas! Fate turns its back on you, yet again
The client proves to be a tad too miserly
Thus pushing your candidate away
However, you continue to resist bravely
Against all odds
Determined to prove a point
More to yourself, than anyone else
However, history repeats itself
For the fourth time in a row
And you are left bruised and battered
In the face of a year full of bad luck
Which has brought you a record seven backouts
And all you can do now
Is to pray, and keep praying
For 2022 to end as soon as possible
Recruitment, is indeed an utterly thankless job
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar May 2022
An acquaintance once advised me
Not to fret over Recruitment
Because it is the easiest job in the world
I have blocked him
But that's not the point
The point is
Recruitment is a pile of work
That keeps growing bigger and bigger
Until it surpasses Mount Everest
And it is also a fly
That keeps hovering tantalisingly above you
Daring you to swat it aside
Before making "The Great Escape"
At the eleventh hour
As far as today was concerned
Recruitment was losing the toss
And watching your bowlers being carted around for boundaries
In all sorts of directions
While enduring a long day in the field
Under the blistering heat of a raging summer
That has already wreaked havoc
Across the entire nation
Who knows what tomorrow may bring
In any case
We do know one thing for sure
Recruitment is anything but an easy job
Fairly self-explanatory!
Ashwin Kumar Nov 2021
For days and days
Weeks and weeks
Months and months
You work the hardest you can
You burn the midnight oil
You sacrifice a lot of things
That you hold dear
Whether it be cricket
Whether it be mobile games
Whether it be online shows
Whether it be exercise, even!
After all your sincere efforts
You are surely bound to think
That success would follow you
However, you are in for a rude shock
Far from being rewarded with success
You are instead punished
With failure after failure
As your efforts go down the drain
One after the other
Until all you are left with
Is a massive pile of zeroes
A reflection of your  rejection
By the candidates
By the clients
And, last but not the least
By your laptop itself!
Recruitment is such a devil
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2019
As every day begins
My heart beats with anticipation
With every call I make
There is a spring in my step
However, all good things come to an end
As the day wears on
The white clouds fade away
And are replaced
By monstrous, jet black clouds
With every call I make
My shoulders droop
My eyes lose their lustre
My hands begin to shake
My voice begins to falter
As the rain of despair begins
My mind loses its focus
I lose all sense of direction
The pile of work on my desk
Grows taller and taller
Until it outgrows Mount Everest
Just when I begin to think
That things can't get any worse
My boss cranks up the pressure
To such a level
That my heart beats faster and faster
I begin to splutter and choke
My mouth begins to foam
My face starts turning blue
With a rapidly shaking hand
I stagger towards my water bottle
Tripping and almost falling on the way
Eventually, with a supreme effort
I manage to prise the bottle cap loose
As I take a gulp of water
I spill a few drops on the floor
Very slowly and steadily
My breathing begins to return to normal
But not before my heart is filled
With a deep desire
To hear the three magic words
"You are fired"
A poem on why Recruitment comes with health (mainly mental health) hazards.
Ashwin Kumar May 2021
Recruitment without Naukri
Is like a cobra
Stripped of its venom
A tree without leaves
A musician without an instrument
A Mutton Biryani without the mutton
A laptop without a battery
I can go on and on
But you get the gist, right?

Recruitment without Naukri
How does it even work?
Of course, there are other portals
LinkedIn, Monster, Indeed
TimesJobs, Shine, Updazz
Dice, Hirist, Instahyre
But do they even come close
To matching the pin-point accuracy
The sheer amount of detailing
The refreshing practicality
And finally, the user-friendliness
That Naukri brings to the table?
The answer to that, unfortunately
Is a resounding no

Recruitment without Naukri?
Can it be managed?
As mentioned earlier
There are other portals
But will your boss be ready to pay
For any of them, apart from LinkedIn?
The answer to that, unfortunately
Is again a resounding no

Recruitment without Naukri
Coupled with a miserly boss
Is like chasing 350 in 50 overs
On a seaming wicket at Leeds
All your hard work at the nets
Goes to the drain
As you keep trying to hit boundaries
And end up getting clean bowled instead
Ultimately, the loser is not the client
Not the boss either
It is you, and only you
This is a rant about being forced to work without Naukri access to CVs for a whole week. People in Recruitment (especially in India) will understand.
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2022
It's been a long, long time
Since I went to school
Therefore, my memory of those days
Is hazier than a cloud of fog
However, whatever I do remember
I remember vividly, as though it were only yesterday

Such as, committing the biggest faux pas of my school years
When I was in the fourth standard
By wearing a t-shirt and jeans one fine day
While everyone else was dressed in uniform

Disturbing the whole class by talking about cricket
And thus getting a nice scolding from the principal
When I was in the fifth standard
Crying in front of the whole class
Later during the same year
Exam tension getting the better of me

Enacting the role of a princess in a cartoon show
While on the way home
During the seventh standard

Failing in quite a few subjects
At the beginning of the eighth standard
After switching from CBSE to ICSE
Being forced into a trekking adventure
Thanks to the annual cross-country races

Scoring an own goal as a goalkeeper
During the ninth standard
Failing in a record number of subjects
During the same year
Thanks to my obsession with cricket

And last but not the least
Making amends for my past failures
By clearing the tenth boards with flying colours

I can go on and on
But I think that's quite enough for today
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar Jan 2021
This is a very important day
A grand and glorious day
The day on which we became a Republic
Thanks to the guiding light
Of Babasaheb Dr. B.R.Ambedkar
The Architect of the Constitution
And the True Father of the Nation
If it were not for the great leader's efforts
In creating such a precious document
Many of us would have been denied
Our basic rights and freedoms
There would have been no equality
Many of us would have been languishing
In the gloomy confines of Tihar Jail
In fact, many of us
Wouldn't even have had the chance to live!

This is a very important day
A grand and glorious day
Or, is it really?
Today is the day
On which we take the pledge
To follow and protect the Constitution
But do we really follow it?
Is there really equality everywhere?
Is everyone getting their basic rights?
Are we really a free country?
Is our human rights record
Really something to be proud of?

This is a very important day
A grand and glorious day
Or, is it really?
If Dr. Ambedkar were alive today
He would have been speechless
With sheer shock and outrage
At the way in which
Our Constitution is being misused
Whether it be innocents languishing in jail
Or the atrocities inflicted by the trigger-happy police
Or arbitrary bills being passed
To benefit the rich and the powerful
Or people being denied a chance to love
Because they belong to different religions
Or an entire state being trapped and besieged
And cut off from any kind of communication whatsoever
And of course, casteism in a myriad variety of forms
At each and every level, whether overt or subtle
The list goes on and on
With no end in sight

This is a very important day
A grand and glorious day
Or rather, supposed to be
In reality, a very sad day
We are cowards at heart
We wear our patriotism on our sleeves
We scream from the rooftops
India! India! India!
But we never question injustice
The sheer injustice perpetrated on a daily basis
On many of our brethren
Especially the marginalised communities
They are also equally patriotic
But we deny them the chance
To even share the stage with us
Till we, the privileged majority
Acknowledge our complicity
In all the injustice and inequality
And start making amends
In action, not mere words
There is no point in celebrating Republic Day
Dedicated to the privileged majority of India (myself included!) on the nation's 72nd Republic Day.
Ashwin Kumar Dec 2019
Rest in peace, India
For you are no more
No more a democracy
No more a republic
No more a secular country
What we are seeing instead
Is a fascist, Brahmanical dictatorship
Where Dalits, Bahujans and Muslims
Are treated as second-rate citizens
Where Brahmins rule the roost
And caste is the order of the day
Where the police run riot
At the slightest sign of a protest
Where equality is dead

Rest in peace, India
For you are no more
The Constitution is being wrecked
By the same people
Who swear to protect it
Day in and day out
This is not the country I knew
This is not the country I loved
Since I was a child
This is Pakistan, not India
After all, we are brothers
United by caste and communalism
Divided only by religion

Rest in peace, India
For you are no more
I so wanna escape it all
Thus I turn to cricket
Watching India play West Indies
In my beloved Chennai
But, then again,
As I turn up the volume
I hear chants of 'India! India!'
This is the last straw
That broke the wretched camel's back
Unable to bear it any longer
I yell 'West Indies! West Indies! '
My prayers are answered
As West Indies win the match
That too as if it were child's play
Rest in peace, India
For you are no more
Poem in the wake of the Citizenship Amendment Bill, followed by the Jamia students' protests and subsequent police atrocities.
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2022
Returning to work
After a rather enjoyable weekend
Is hardly something to rejoice about
Especially when you are handling Recruitment
And particularly when you work in a startup
A startup that supposedly gives you freedom
Freedom for the employer, that is
To keep nagging his employees
From time to time
But not freedom for the employees
To work as per their convenience
You feel like a balloon
Pressed on all sides
By the boss, candidates and clients
One false step
And Boom! you are back to square one
And left with a mountain to climb
At the speed of light
You know, though, what's the worst part?
It's the uncertainty
Whether it be in finding relevant resumes
Or speaking to a bunch of candidates
And trying to convince them
Or, if you do somehow manage to convince someone
Waiting for him/her to share the CV
Is like watching that infamous innings of Sunil Gavaskar
In the 1975 World Cup
It kills you from inside
Such that, you just can't wait
For a miracle to happen
Which involves the client
Uttering the magic words
"This position is temporarily on hold"
Self-explanatory
Ashwin Kumar Dec 2022
After a thoroughly enjoyable weekend
Which involved watching an animated science fiction thriller
Followed by a Football World Cup Final
Which turned out to be even more thrilling
I had to face the dreaded prospect
Of returning to work on a Monday
Yes, the notorious villain of the week
Which can ensure sleepless nights
Even for the strongest souls
Well, the day was actually not that bad
To begin with, at least
After a hot bath
Followed by an even hotter cup of filter coffee
Prepared by my dear mother, as ever
I had a simple breakfast
Consisting of a plate of chapatis
Mixed with some rather tangy marmalade
Thus, I was ready
To face the grind of work
Or at least, I thought I was
The reality turned out to be as different
As apples and oranges
It started with a few phone calls
However, the response was not flattering
Thus, I headed to lunch
In the hope of making some progress
In the second half of the day
However, I couldn't have been more wrong
The phone calls failed to achieve their purpose
As I was unable to obtain slots
For the interviews to be scheduled
Moreover, I was dealing with multiple stuff
At the same time
Which proved to be even more difficult
Than obtaining a seat in one of the IIMs
Time was playing a cat-and-mouse game with me
The closer I got to him
The more he would evade me
As the hours flew by
I kept meandering aimlessly
Without achieving anything tangible
By the time I finally got the hang of work
It was already well past 6 PM
And I felt as though I had wasted more time
Than a certain Sunil Gavaskar had done
In his infamous innings of 36 not out, off 175 *****
In the inaugural 1975 Cricket World Cup
Thus, I was thoroughly relieved
When the day finally ended
Returning to work on a Monday
Especially after a thoroughly enjoyable weekend
Is never good
Full stop
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar Nov 21
Say I love you, Ms. T
Willing am I, to change
And expand my range
But I will change only my behaviour
Not my nature
For you, can I be silent
Become less brutally honest
Speak more softly
Walk more slowly
Keep some distance
Be less tense
Irrespective of the situation
Give you more attention
Even go to jail if required
As long as the cause is good!

Say I love you, Ms. T
With you, will I always be
Loyal to the tee
Through sunny and rainy days
Even if I never get my way
Your secrets, will I keep forever
For you, deeply will I care
However, never will I be overprotective
No matter what, will I do my best to stay positive
After all, are we a team
And you make me beam!!

Say I love you, Ms. T
So much fun, can we have
And so much, can I give
A night out at Elliot's Beach
Swapping tales at lunch
While I savour a Beef Biryani
Writing poems about each other
Listening to Harris Jayaraj songs together
Dissing the central government
Getting into a Harry Potter related argument
Travelling in a "toy train"
Dancing in the Chennai rain
The list will be endless
And will I make sure, nothing you miss!!

Say I love you, Ms. Y
If you love me back
I swear I will always have your back
Because, are you my world
And it is your hand I will forever hold
If not, then thank you for this beautiful opportunity
To write yet another piece of romantic poetry!!
Poem on a hypothetical situation where I am in love with an imaginary woman 'Ms. T' .
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2022
Day after day
Week after week
Month after month
Year after year
You've shown the world
How not to be an employer
Treating your employees like slaves
Demeaning them with insults
That were way below the belt
Denying them their basic pay
For which they have braved storms
Scaled towering mountain peaks
And dived to the bottom of the Pacific Ocean
And firing a few of them
For no justifiable reason whatsoever
Today, however
You have sunk to a new low
It is bad enough to not pay your employees
But to accuse them of not doing their jobs
And lie to their faces'
That you've been paying them properly
Is despicable to the core
And goes on to show
That you are nothing more
Than a rat in the gutter
But then, the rat at least deserves to be put out of its misery
You, on the other hand
Deserve to rot in the confines of Tihar Jail
For a very very long time
Of course, we all know the famous saying
An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind
But it applies only to human beings
You are not one
Dedicated to the monster who calls himself the owner of the company where my best friend works
Ashwin Kumar Mar 21
So happy am I, that we met
It was a priceless moment
Something I had been greatly longing for
Because, you are one of the anchors
Which ensure our ship stays afloat
And never can you be bought!
A wonderful colleague, you are
With a heart that deeply cares
For anyone and everyone
Well, are you indeed a special someone!!

So happy am I, that we met
To the team, are you a priceless asset
We all had an amazing time
Like a family, would one assume
So fun are you, to be around
And we share a fantastic bond
Not to mention, are you sweet as sugar
And at the same time, work with great vigour!
May God bless you, you wonderful human being
Without you, are we nothing!!
Poem dedicated to my colleague and friend Smita, whom I met for the first time last month.
Ashwin Kumar Aug 13
So happy am I, to be your friend
To your chatter, is there no end
Working with you is an absolute delight
Your sincerity is almost impossible to beat!

So happy am I, to be your friend
We share a lovely bond
You are extremely caring and protective
Rarely, are you negative
You is it, who makes me smile
Most of the time
Even when things aren't exactly rosy
You are like a blooming daisy!!

So happy am I, to be your friend
You are unbelievably kind
A rocking wife and mother
Never, are you a bother
So much, do you struggle
But so much more, do you achieve
Really, are you incredible
Not everything, do you have
But you manage everything so well
And in spite of all that you go through
Rarely, are you dull
Very very well, do you ride the rough!!

So happy am I, to be your friend
Never, will our friendship end
Not as long as I live
You are so, so brave
Take care, my dear
And may the Lord bless you
With everything that you deeply desire!!
Dedicated to my dear colleague and friend, Namrata.
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2017
People come and go in our life
Most make an impact
True friends help you in strife
With no need for a pact
Some are truly special
They last forever
Bound by rules never
There was one such girl
Whom I met at office
Lively and innocent as a kid
For whom honesty would suffice
Took a mere month it did
For a friendship to bloom
Moulded in an old school of thought
For me she fought
When my office seemed to be my doom
My scooter became our companion
Her family on my side
In a storm, we would turn the tide
Slowly my family became part of the union
My home a second home for her
Our joys and sorrows intertwined
Office politics sadly intervened
For them, it wasn't a friendship mere
I stood my ground in support
My family pulled their weight
Her courage and strength ensured no taint
There were times we fought
But our friendship always won
A better job came to her rescue
For her talent, long overdue
One for all, all for one
Our friendship endured and grew
A strong union of the middle-class and poor
Ensured by hearts pure
No matter where the winds blew
My family a bedrock in her hour of need
Symbiotic our relationship indeed
Soon her wedding bells rang
My mother and I responded
With great hospitality we were rewarded
At her home, to us her family sang
To this day, remains our friendship
As no rules in such a special relationship
This is dedicated to my best friend. Also, the line "One for all, all for one" is directly borrowed from Alexandre Dumas' "The Three Musketers"
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2023
I am one of those guys
Who are reticent at first
But open up, as you get to know them
And once you've loosened my tongue
There's no stopping me
As I will go on and on
Till you die of boredom
Jokes apart, I am autistic
Which means that I may struggle
When it comes to social interaction
And can often be absent-minded
However, on the brighter side
My long-term memory is really good
And autism doesn't impact my work in the slightest
I am a good listener too
You can trust me with secrets
And I'll take them to the grave
Without a second thought
You may mock me as much as you like
But lay a finger on my close friends
And I will send you back to your maker!!
On that warning note
It's time for me to wrap up this little monologue
However, if you've attended job interviews
You would know that they usually begin like this
"Tell me about yourself"
Well, if you want a suitable answer
Then use this poem of mine as a reference
Just joking, don't even think of doing that!!
Poem about myself
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2023
When all hopes are dashed
When nothing goes right
When water turns into sludge
Gold turns into rusted iron
Love turns into Hatred
Happiness turns into Despair
Friendship turns into Betrayal
And last but not the least
Good turns into Evil
I think of you
To the world, you may be an actress
But to me, you represent Hope
Your smile tells me
That everything is going to be all right soon
Your laugh tells me
To forget all my troubles
And come up with jokes instead
Including those that make fun of our government
Without the fear of getting arrested
Your sweet voice tells me
To listen to Harris Jayaraj melodies
So that I can stay calm
Even when facing an angry cobra
Who is itching to send me back to my maker
Your expressions tell me
That life is an emotional rollercoaster
Full of ups and downs
And sometimes it is okay not to be happy
Or to experience mood swings
And finally
Your dance moves tell me
That sometimes you just need to play kuthu songs
And dance like Legend Saravanan
No matter what the society says
And yes, I don't know you well
You probably haven't even heard of me
But thank you for entering my life
And finding a way to keep me sane
Even when I am surrounded by chaos on all sides
And there is no escape route
Poem dedicated to the Malayalam superstar, the one and only Aishwarya Lekshmi!!
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2023
This incident happened more than five years ago
It was a Tuesday
And I'd gone to office as usual
Which involved a long commute
From Powai to Lower Parel
By the famous Mumbai locals
A typically exhausting commute
Made worse by the fact that it was the month of August
And therefore I had to deal with the rains as well
Something seemed to be off
As far as that particular day was concerned
Quite a few of my candidates
Were not responding to my calls
And what was worse
Was the fact that it was raining cats and dogs
In fact, my boss, who was on the way to office
Got stuck somewhere in between
And ultimately gave up the ghost
Deciding to work from home instead!!
He also instructed me and my colleague to leave office
As soon as we were done with all our critical work
Since we both had brought our lunch
We decided to leave after eating
However, our troubles for the day
Were just about to begin
It was raining heavier than ever
Just as we left office
Accompanied by an acquaintance
Trains were not running on the Western line
Thus, we were forced to walk all the way to Currey Road
Instead of Lower Parel, which was much nearer
Meanwhile, my colleague, who was residing in Girgaum
Decided to take a taxi home
While our acquaintance gave me company
Since his home was near Sion
Which falls on the Central line
And is on the way to Vikhroli
Where I was supposed to get down
However, just as we entered Currey Road station
The enormity of the situation
Struck us with the force of a bullet
There was a sea of people
And a rope was placed in the middle of the platform
In order to control the crowd
On the left side of the platform, there was a local
Which was apparently stuck there for quite some time
And on the right, the track was heavily waterlogged
All these were ominous signs
That something was seriously wrong
Well, we boarded the local
And were lucky to get seats
It was a silver lining
In the darkness that was about to follow
The train was in no hurry to depart
Whenever I heard the sound of its motors
My heart would leap with a mixture of joy and relief
Since it seemed to indicate that we would start soon
However, it didn't take me long to realise
That all my hopes had been dashed
The fact was that the motors had to be switched on and off
Every now and then
Just in order to keep the engine running
In the middle of all the chaos caused by the rains
Yes, the situation was so chaotic
That a few reporters had a field day
Meanwhile, I checked in on my colleague
And his feeble voice told its own story
He had to walk all the way
From Mumbai Central, where the taxi was forced to drop him
Till his home in Girgaum!!
Moreover, our acquaintance invited me to walk with him till Sion
So that we could have an adventure!!
However, I was in absolutely no mood for such stuff
As all I wanted, was to reach home in one piece
No matter how long it took
However, the hours slowly tricked by
And the local showed absolutely no signs of moving
Again though, there was a silver lining
In the middle of all this darkness
A Marathi NGO magnificently rose to the occasion
And started distributing packets of food to the stranded passengers
It was truly like a godsend
And helped me keep my wits about
As afternoon turned to evening
And evening to night
While the water on the right side track
Was rising higher and higher
And it soon dawned on me
That the unthinkable was about to happen
That is, I had no choice
But to spend the night at Currey Road station!!!
Yes, it was an unpleasant situation indeed
But I decided to face it anyway
Since the station was a safe place after all
And as we all know
One is always safer in a crowd
Of course, sleeping wasn't going to be an easy task
I tried various positions
Each more uncomfortable than the other
Before finally dropping off to sleep
More out of sheer exhaustion than anything else
When I eventually woke up
Things were slowly limping back to normal
Trains had started moving in the opposite direction
Eventually we departed as well
Though at a snail's pace
And had a few unscheduled stops on the way
When we reached Sion, there came the next twist in the tale
We were stuck for one and a half hours
And I began to fear
That history would repeat itself
However, God was merciful enough
To ensure that it didn't happen
In fact, after we crossed Kurla
We resumed our usual pace
And reached Vikhroli in almost no time
I was home by around 11 am
And was greeted by my family
Who were thoroughly relieved
And also full of praise
Since I had maintained my cool
In such a difficult and unforeseen situation
Ultimately, it had turned out to be an adventure worth reliving
Even if not the kind of adventure
That the acquaintance had embarked upon
And wanted me to be part of
Poem about an adventure involving the Mumbai rains and Mumbai locals; which happened on Tuesday 29th August 2017.
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2018
There is a time
When nothing goes right
Anything that you touch
Turns into stone
At work, candidates ignore you
All the relationships built
Through days of hard work
Evaporate on that day
The world seems to turn against you
Leaving you frustrated and helpless
And left with no alternative
But to take the blame
Squarely on your own shoulders
Wishing you could be anywhere
But in your own body

As time passes by
Slower than a snail
You greatest desire
Is that the day should end
And you are put out of your misery
However, Fate has other plans
While you are determined
To escape from the rush
In the famous Mumbai locals
Vodafone decides to come to the party
The network falls apart
Leaving you watching helplessly
As Uber and Ola fail to load
And Fate wears a gloating smile
As you are forced
To board the dreaded train
And simply adjust
Amongst a sea of commuters
Your greatest desire
Is that the day should end
Poem written by me yesterday while waiting for the local train and reflecting on a frustrating day on the whole
Ashwin Kumar May 2023
I had really hoped
To forget you, once and for all
However, it seems you are always hovering around
Like an annoying little mosquito
Ready to **** the blood
Of anyone and everyone in your vicinity
And looking for that perfect window of opportunity
To mock my shortcomings
Which apparently do not exist
For your precious little "best friend"
Who has a smug smile on his face
Ready to defend you at the drop of a hat
Of course, it will only be a matter of time
Before you tire of him as well
Because, people exist merely for your needs
Which are about as realistic
As Telugu action movies are
Therefore, it is a huge irony
That you were my first female friend
Of course, I am not sure you understand
What friendship truly means
Because, you promise one thing
And then proceed to do the exact opposite
May God help that unfortunate soul
Who truly cares for you
Because s/he will be in for a rollercoaster ride
Which will never end
Until your delusional fantasies are satisfied
By the time that eventually happens
S/he would be dead
Anyway, it was you
Who wanted to be friends with me in the first place
I, being a naive idiot
Readily accepted your offer of friendship
And was with you
Through thick and thin
However, you cut me off
When you needed me no longer
I apologised to you a number of times
Not because I did anything wrong
But because your inflated ego required a massage
Alas! To you, I was nothing more than a problem child
Whom you wanted to mould
According to your whims and fancies
I was never an independent human being
Who could make his own choices
And live his life on his own terms
Your own Brahmin sensibilities matter more to you
Than a friend who genuinely cared for you
Unlike "Mr Smug Face", whom I had mentioned earlier
You destroyed my self-confidence
And turned me into an insecure wreck
God knows how many more people exist
Whom you've treated as "use and throw"
Just keep one thing in mind, though
There will surely be a time
When the tables are turned
And it is you who will become a lonely wreck
Then there will be noone
Who is ready to rush to your aid
Because, you will be forgotten; once and for all
As you deserve to be
Poem dedicated to my first female friend, who cut me off because of a silly comment on Facebook.
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2022
What is the greatest gift of all?
You can think of a lot of things
A house, a car, a mobile phone
Money, power, fame
Food, drinks, sweets
And I can go on and on
However, as you all know
All these are indicative
Of a materialistic state of mind
In my opinion, the greatest gift
That a human being can receive
Is none other than empathy
There is nothing quite as impactful
As putting yourself in the shoes of others
To show love, you need to show empathy
Imagine the struggles your loved ones go through
Every single day
In order to be successful
When a friend tells you her problems
Listen, not simply to provide solutions
But to understand her perspective
And it doesn't apply only to family and friends
It can apply to anyone
For instance, if you are a counsellor
You need to put yourself in your patient's shoes
And understand why he reacts the way he does
So that you can advise him suitably
If you are a doctor
You need to think the way your patient does
So that you can reassure her
Therefore, it is very important to be empathetic
Because you will then be doing your bit
To make the world a better place to live
Of course, it will not happen overnight
But slowly and steadily
The impact can be felt
However, not everyone is blessed with empathy
There are so many of us
Who think of only themselves
It may help them in the short term
However, they will not be able to find happiness
In the long run
What's the use of wealth or power
If you are not surrounded by people
Who will stick around
Even when the going gets tough?
Hence, as I've said before
The greatest gift
That a human being can receive
Is empathy
Full stop
Self-explanatory
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2022
Recruitment is like walking on a tightrope
You have to maintain your balance
Every minute, every second
While different people try to distract you
From different sides
The candidates, the clients
And finally, the boss
One mistake and it will be the end for you
You may think I'm being overly dramatic
But trust me, you'll soon understand
Handling multiple roles
For multiple clients
And speaking with multiple candidates
Is enough to send your brain into a tizzy
And cause your heart to beat
Way faster than what is considered normal
When you successfully close a role
It is considered "all in a day's work"
On the other hand, when something goes wrong
You're on the chopping block right away
Recruitment is indeed like walking on a tightrope
But it is also a tug-of-war
In which you get pulled from three sides
Yep, you guessed it
The candidates, the clients and the boss
A war in which there is only one loser
And that is you
I am sorry for being such a killjoy
But I believe in laying before you
The harsh realities of this profession
Rather than giving you any false hopes
After all, as a famous professor and wizard once said
"Numbing the pain will make it worse when you finally feel it"
Self-explanatory!!
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