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Ashwin Kumar May 2023
You come from God's own country
And radiate such a beautiful aura
That, unless my eyes are deceived
It seems that you are God herself
Just kidding, you are a human being like any other
A rather beautiful one, though
Your smile is so divine
That it can melt even the hardest of hearts
Your laugh is so infectious
That it can send the entire planet
Into a fit of violent giggles
Your glare is so intense
That it can even **** Lord Voldemort
Faster than it takes to utter the words "Avada Kedavra" !!
Your Tamil accent is so cute
That even a newborn baby would pale in comparison
Your English is so brilliant
That it would put even the Oxford dictionary to shame
Your acting is so superlative
That it would surpass even the drama of Shakespeare plays!!
And finally, I have to shamelessly admit
That I wish I were born in an alternate universe
Where you and I could be together
For the rest of our lives
Because you are not only an accomplished actress
But also a beautiful human being
The heroine who captured my heart
Dedicated to one of my favourite celebrities, actress Aishwarya Lekshmi.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 2022
Thirty two years and counting
I haven't found true love yet
And I am not considering unrequited love
I've been there twice
The first occasion was during my MBA
To cut a long story short
I simply couldn't pluck up the courage
To tell her how I felt
When I eventually managed to do it
It turned out to be a case of locking the stable
After the horse had well and truly bolted
The second occasion was an arranged marriage
Where the engagement brought us closer to each other
Or at least, I thought so
But the issue was, the girl didn't
And the pandemic pulled us apart
Metaphorically as well as physically
Thus, that didn't end well either
Now that I am single again
Thanks to this amazing human invention called "divorce"
The hunt for true love continues
Before we proceed further, though
Let me get this off my chest
I am a work in progress, not a finished product
And I have my flaws
But then, we all know the saying
Nobody is perfect
Everybody has some flaw or the other
In fact, it is these flaws
That separates us human beings from robots
Which are equally intelligent as we are, if not more
But I am going off-track
The point is, I need someone who loves me as I am
Of course, it works both ways
If I love someone with all my heart
I would do anything for her
I mean, anything that comes within the definition of "ethical"
And I wouldn't want her to change one bit
I mean, as far as her character is concerned
Now that we are all on the same page
It is time for me
To resume the hunt for true love
Of course, we all may have our expectations
But I ask for only two things
Unwavering loyalty and trust
And accepting me as as I am
With all my flaws
And when I do fall in love
I hope and pray
That it is reciprocated, for a change
Ashwin Kumar Oct 14
In India, we need feminism
Because, it stands for equality
Before you start losing your calm
Please allow me to clarify
Feminism means not, women dominating men
It means equal rights for both men and women
And of course, women empowerment
Now, let me be blunt
India is not and has never been a great place for women
Our society enables male *******
In almost every sphere of life
Which ends up creating a lot of strife
It is time to change all of that
Hence, is feminism so important
Because, women need to find their voice
And for that, they must have a choice
To do what they desire
Without invoking the society's ire
So, it is time to dismantle our Brahminical patriarchy
Only then, can we really reform our society
Because, gender and caste go hand-in-hand
We cannot destroy gender inequality with a magic wand
It is necessary to strike at its very root
Which, essentially, is caste
For instance, why do so many rapes happen?
Because, they enable upper caste male *******
****** harassment and **** reinforce the caste structure
Thus, does the Manusmriti continue to influence gender
And proactively hinder women empowerment
Again, this is why feminism is so important
But it also needs to be intersectional
And include women at all levels
Of our wretched caste hierarchy
In order to achieve gender equality
It is necessary for Brahmin and Savarna women to take a pause
And allow Bahujan women to make uniformed choices for themselves
Instead of dictating terms to them all the time
Also, men need to be part of feminism
After all, inclusiveness is the very core of feminism
It transcends gender, ***, race, religion and caste
Was not Babasaheb Dr. B.R. Ambedkar one of India's greatest feminists?
It is thanks to this beautiful soul
That, at least in theory, are men and women equal
As far as our country is concerned
Therefore, feminism is something we greatly need
But it can be successful only when it includes everyone
Thus, in order to make India a much safer place for women
Everybody must adopt feminism
Because, it is equivalent to humanism!
Jai Bhim!!
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2023
You may think that you are just another actress
But there is something truly special about you
Your eyes burn with a fire
That refuses to die, no matter what
Your expressions are priceless
If magic truly existed
Your smile would have worked like a love potion
Sweeping me off my feet
And into your outstretched arms
When it comes to acting, though
You show a wide range of emotions
Happy, sad, angry
Confused, depressed, disappointed
And whatnot!!
You are truly the Queen of Mollywood
And the Rising Star of Kollywood
However, success hasn't gone to your head
You are humble and unassuming by nature
But you don't have a filter
When it comes to expressing your views
Something that I can totally relate to
All in all, your mere presence
Has the capacity to render me speechless
And I am ready to watch any movie of yours
Irrespective of the genre
You are the reason I am able to smile
Through all the pain I face in life
Of course, I am sure you have thousands of ardent admirers
But you mean the world to me
Just remain the way you are
Keep chasing your dreams
And I am sure you will do wonders
Take care and wish you all the very best!!
Yet another poem dedicated to the Queen of Malayalam cinema, actress Aishwarya Lekshmi.
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2019
On a dark, dreary day
Kissed by the Rain Devils
Who launch a monstrous attack
In the form of buckets
Of water so cold
That it sends shivers down your spine
As you keep a brave face
Confronted with a heap of work
As tall as Mount Everest
With every passing minute
Despair creeps in
And penetrates your system
Infecting every nerve and bone
Every artery and vein
Until an epidemic breaks out
As you are about to pass out
An angel stirs inside you
It seems to be saying something
That sounds a lot like gibberish
As you regain some of your senses
You realize that the angel is singing
And, all of a sudden
Your head is filled with music
Music that is so symmetrical
That it is the very antithesis of noise
With every beat
Your foot begins to tap
Your body begins to sway to and fro
A fresh ray of light
Begins to dawn upon you
As it fills your mind and body
Your heart and soul
You begin to realise
That the tide can be turned
However, just as your resurgence is growing
It is brutally thrown off the rails
By a large and ugly boulder
In the form of a Skype message
Delivered by your tormentor-in-chief
The boss, ably supported by his cronies
The clients, reasonably unreasonable, as always
However, though you may have lost the battle
You can still win the war
Because, the flame of Hope, once rekindled
Can never be extinguished
Thanks to music, you can dare to dream
Such is the magic of Harris Jayaraj
My poem tribute to Harris Jayaraj, master musician of South India; and how listening to his music helps me deal with stress - especially at work.
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2019
Is it wrong to forget?
The mind is an ocean
Filled to the brim with thoughts
Rising like a crescendo
Before plummeting sharply
Like a tsunami
Then there are the feelings
Lurking around every nook and corner
Ready to catch you unawares
And take a juicy bite of your leg
As sharks do
As you go deeper and deeper
Total chaos reigns
In the form of perceptions and judgements
Those ****** icebergs
Which can sink even the unsinkable ships

Is it wrong to forget?
The mind is an ocean
Deeper than the Pacific
More stormy than the Atlantic
Even as you swim with the tide
Alternating between hope and despair
With every high and low
You barely manage to stay afloat
Eventually being ******
Into a whirlpool of depression
As you go round and round
You sink lower and lower
Until you forget where you are
You forget who you are
And you wonder
How you came into existence
So, tell me
Is it really wrong to forget?
Why it is not wrong to forget
Ashwin Kumar Jan 2023
The most beautiful relationship of all
Is not romance
It is friendship
Because there are no rules
No layers or complexities
Just shared understanding
Which is unconditional in nature
When I think about friendship
I think particularly about you
Whom I've known for ten years
Mind you, I've known quite a few friends
For a longer period of time
However, none of them are as special
As you are, to me
Very humble and unassuming
And yet having an enthusiasm
That is hard to match
When it comes to your favourite topics
Such as gaming, movies, animes and Hindu mythology
You have an easygoing and amicable nature
That would appeal to most people
Which is why I'm surprised
That you don't have a lot of friends
But then, it is better to have a few friends
Who mean the world to you
And would do anything for you
Rather than a large group of friends
Who are only there to share your joys
And are unable to support you
When you need it the most
I follow this principle to the tee
In fact, we both are in the same boat
You have always stood by me
In my hour of need
In fact, you are more of a family member
Than a friend
And I am really glad
That your family sees me the same way as well
In fact, your mother was a very close friend
Of my late maternal grandmother
And it is no coincidence
That Patti came in your dream
Just before she left for her heavenly abode
Our friendship is indeed a beautiful relationship
One that will last
As long as we ourselves do
Just be the way you are
And have a little bit more faith in yourself
Most importantly, thank you for coming into my life
And staying with me
Through good and bad times
Because that's what friendship is all about
Poem dedicated to Rahul, a close friend of mine; who used to be my neighbour in Chennai earlier.
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2023
We've known each other
For more than ten years
Initially we were neighbours
And it didn't take a lot of time
For us to get along with each other
Moreover, it also helped
That my maternal grandmother
Was a good friend of your mother
So, we soon became good friends
Since we had a lot in common
The most important of all
Was the fact that we lacked friends
And by "friends" I mean true friends
With whom we could share anything
And who were always ready to help us
If the need arose
Well, I badly needed such a friend
And I am really glad to say
That you fit the bill very well indeed
Because you are extremely humble and unassuming
Don't judge anyone
Possess a lot of patience
Don't get angry easily
Are very gentle by nature
And above all, are thoroughly loyal and trustworthy
Whenever I've visited your home
I've always been treated like a family member
Your mother is extremely kind and sweet by nature
And understands me as well
As my own family does
I've also enjoyed visiting your game centre
And watching movies for free
You are very talented indeed
And I hope and pray
That all that hard work you've been putting in
Finally pays off one day
I feel very comfortable sharing things with you
Seriously, it gives me a lot of relief
Since you are a great listener
And more empathetic than you give yourself credit for
Similarly, you are also welcome
To share anything and everything with me
I am always ready to listen
And offer you moral support
Last but not the least
I will always help you whenever you are in need
Take care, keep smiling and may God bless you da
Dedicated to my close friend Rahul in Chennai.
Ashwin Kumar Sep 18
Whenever I experience pain
Whether it be physical or mental
I don't feel I am alone
Because your words are so powerful
That they transport me into another realm
Where I begin to feel a sense of calm
And a voice speaks
"Everything is going to be alright soon"
Slowly and steadily, the pain fades
And I begin to feel at ease again
You may not be a witch
But your poetry is so rich
And so full of passion
That it gives me motivation
To do whatever I earlier thought was impossible
Your attitude makes EVERYTHING seem possible
The way you write a novel
Sets an example for us all
Full of dry and witty humour
Not to mention, extreme candour
And at the same time, you keep the readers guessing
Hence, no book of yours can ever be called "boring"
And your activism lights a flame in us
Which is extremely difficult to extinguish
Thanks to you, am I starting to find the courage and strength
To fight my battles with mental health
And hoping to emerge stronger than ever
Dear Comrade, I will forget you never
Jai Bhim! Vaazhga Periyar!!
This is about how I draw inspiration from Dr. Meena Kandasamy - much celebrated novelist, poet, translator, academic, intersectional feminist and anti-caste activist.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 2023
As we all know
Life is full of ups and downs
However, a lot of people advise you
To see the positive side of everything that happens
Well, it's not exactly an impossible task
But easier said than done
For instance, if you've lost someone close to you
You'd be hard-placed to find any positives in that
After all, once someone is gone
S/he is gone forever
And all that remains of him/her
Is the memories that you carry with you
Of course, you do need to move on
And you become stronger in the process
But that's still nothing
Compared to the grief you've gone through
And the pains you've taken
In order to overcome that grief
And get your life back into top gear
Anyway, let's take a less extreme example
Imagine you are in Recruitment
And handling an extremely difficult requirement
Where finding the right people
Is even more difficult
Than booking a tatkal ticket through IRCTC
You do your very best
Search frantically in various portals
Talk to a truckload of people
Face rejection after rejection
But refuse to give up
And keep on searching
As well as talking
Till you somehow manage to find a couple of relevant candidates
Who are genuinely interested
However, your client rejects them
And thus you are back to square one
Well, there is a positive side in all this
You've now got more clarity on what the client wants
Or rather, doesn't want
But look at what it has cost you
All those hours you've spent
Are not going to come back
And on top of it
The requirement has become even more difficult
So, all those people who advise you
To see the positive side of everything that happens
Need to understand, once and for all
That it may be easy for them to say such things
But actually following their own advice
Is a different matter altogether
Poem meant to be sent as a message who tell you to look for the positives for everything in life.
Ashwin Kumar Dec 2023
Killed, have you, thousands of innocents
Truly, are you Satan's agents
Destroying an entire nation
In the name of counter-terrorism
Completely abandoning rationalism
And carrying out mass slaughter, with chilling precision

You call yourself a democracy
Yet, you show absolutely no mercy
Even when it cometh to children
Your humanity is absolutely barren
When we call you out
"Anti-Semitic", do you brand us, without a second thought
Jesus tells us to love even our enemies
However, your sheer hatred never does cease

You pretend to be the victim
However, filled to the brim
Is your cup of everlasting greed
As you continue to occupy land after land
And never allow the world to take a stand
Even as there are millions to feed
While the genocide reaches a fever pitch
Because, always functions, does your killing machine, without a hitch

You are so evil
That you **** and ****
Without giving a dime about incurring the wrath of God
Over goodness, do you run roughshod

You think you own Palestine
However, enough have we seen
And enough have we had
The world is mad
Soon, will you pay the price
For your insatiable avarice
Your days are numbered
Soon, will the tide be turned

You may continue your state terrorism
Which you call "counter-terrorism"
However, it is only a matter of time
Before there is divine retribution
For the numerous crimes of your so-called democratic nation
Viva Palestina!!
Amen!! Hallelujah!!
Poem denouncing the genocide of Palestinians being carried out by Israel.
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2022
Hiring For Investment Banking roles
Is like wading through a swamp
At first, it may appear as easy
As winning the French Open is, for Rafael Nadal
Since there is a decent pool of candidates
Waiting to be tapped into
However, as the old cliche goes
Appearances are deceptive
There are numerous pits
In the form of various factors
That influence the interest levels
Of each and every candidate
Such as, the job location
The salary
The bonus payout
The appraisal cycle
The scope of the role
The reporting manager
The brand
And most importantly, the work culture
It requires a truckload of skills
As well as a fat lot of luck
To maneuver your way through the swamp
And successfully avoid these pits
Which lurk in the shadows
Waiting to catch you unawares
One slip-up, and you may lose a candidate
Every time that happens
You'll find yourself sinking into the mud
Slowly, but surely
The harder you try to escape
The deeper you end up sinking
By the time you find that "perfect candidate"
Your face is all that will remain above the surface
And the only thing that can save you
Is the client uttering the magic words
"This position is now on hold"
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2022
I have been putting up with you
For days and days
Weeks and weeks
Months and months
And even years and years
Your service has been average at best
And appalling at worst
Issues here, issues there
You name them, you have them
Frequent call drops
Truncated conversations
Total silence at the other end
Whatsapp calls getting disconnected
Nearly every minute
My own voice echoing
And I can go on and on
Every time I complain
You have your excuses at the ready
Geographical conditions
Mobile network settings
Problems with the SIM card
Or for that matter, the handset
It's a miracle
That I didn't die of sheer boredom
After listening to your nonsense
Anyway, I decided to give you a few chances
And thanks to my frequent complaints
There finally seemed to be a bit of improvement
In the overall service
However, I should have known
That it would be too good to last
The same issues started recurring
As always, I have been exceedingly patient
But now things have really gone too far
When a customer is deprived
Of a service as basic as sending a text message
It means the time has come
To end the relationship with the service provider
Once and for all
Probably the last poem I may write about Vodafone
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2018
The wait has been long
Two weeks and counting
As everyday passes
You tell yourself to be patient
And do your work calmly
As though everything is all right
As the minutes turn to hours
Hours turn to days
And days turn to weeks
But still nothing happens
No message from your bank
No credit added to your account
Same old excuses given
Your resolve can no longer hold
Your steely focus falters
You make mistakes
That you would not have made
Even in your wildest dreams
Every hurdle looks insurmountable
The commute to office
Suddenly seems like a marathon
You lash out at strangers
Over matters as mundane
As your typing speed
At home, you drown yourself
In Agatha Christie's finest ****** mysteries
Forgetting that you have to sleep
Just reading and reading
To escape from the mad world around you
Till your eye muscles scream in protest
You clench your fists
Flex your muscles
And sharpen your teeth
As the devil awakens inside you
Ready to pounce on your master
And seek divine retribution
For making you wait so long
And denying you
What is rightfully yours
Fairly self-explanatory!
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2023
What did I lack, as a friend?
I always helped you
Even when I was busy
I provided you moral support
I stood up for you
When you were made fun of
I took time out for you
As and when I could
I even invited you over to my home
Along with my other friends
And my mother and grandmother took great trouble
To ensure that you all had a delicious lunch
They treated you like a family member
And after college, I continued to keep in touch
As much as I could
Though I made new friends, during my MBA
I never ever forgot you
Also, in case you forgot
It was you
Who wanted to be friends with me in the first place
At a time when I was too shy
To initiate conversations with girls
You broke me out of my shell
So, I thought it was obvious
That you cared for me
How wrong I was
You just saw me as a project
Which eventually got completed
After we left college
I was nothing more to you
Than a tool, to be used and thrown
I was never truly a friend to you
Though you called me your best friend
And that too multiple times
You took offense over a harmless comment
And cut me off from your life
It never occurred to you
That I could be very sensitive
And therefore such an incident could impact me adversely
Including destroying my self-esteem
And creating trust issues
Anyway, you may be flying high at the moment
But keep in mind
That, as the ancient cliche goes
"What goes around comes around"
I have nothing more to say
Except that you can try to be a better human being
And think about other people as well
After all, the world doesn't revolve around you alone
Poem dedicated to one of my former friends from my Engineering College who ghosted me over a comment on one of her Facebook photos.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 2020
Thirty years and counting
Every day, as life goes on
A fiery battle rages
In my mind, heart and soul
Conflicting thoughts and emotions
Wage an unholy war
Armed with a billion weapons
Far more destructive than nuclear bombs
The resulting carnage threatens
A result far worse than a Dementor's Kiss
You know, I never asked for this
I never asked to be born autistic
Of course, it is good to be different
But, does everybody appreciate this difference?
In India, the society judges you
Based on what you speak
However, my mouth is blessed
With an ability to turn
Anything that it touches, into stone
Resulting in decades of social anxiety
If only wishes were horses
I would be in Britain
Where actions speak louder than words
After all, not for nothing
Was King George VI one of the finest rulers
In spite of being born
With the handicap of a speech defect?

Thirty years and counting
Everybody seems to like me
Everybody seems to think I'm nice
Up to a point, that is
The moment I dare
To step out of my threshold
The moment I dare
To break codes of conformity
The moment I dare
To question any form of injustice
Is the moment of truth
It is the moment
When everybody shows their true colours
It is the moment
I stop being nice
Instead; I am angry, disturbed, jealous
Naive, immature, unreliable
Confused, weird, crazy
And the list goes on and on
With no end in sight

Thirty years and counting
I have seen enough
I have heard enough
I have felt enough
The time has finally come
For an internal independence struggle
Gone are the days
When I was busy being a 'Yes Man'
Now, if you have a problem with me
I can only tell you this
Tomorrow, you may find
A pill of cyanide
In your cup of coffee
Or a cobra in your shoulder bag
Or a bullet in your temple
Or a bomb in your briefcase
The choice is entirely yours, my dears
This poem has a dark ending, and a Harry Potter reference.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 3
Thou art a beautiful friend
For whom, never does love end
Selfless are you, to the core
And never do you bore
Though we are not related
Our families are closely connected

Thou art a beautiful friend
Whom I will always defend
Always are you there, for me
Talking with you helps set me free
Often, do we talk for hours
You know the famous saying "When it rains, it pours"
Similarly, when we open up to each other
Nothing can stop us
Which is a major plus
As far as our friendship is concerned
Neither do we get bored
Nor do we get tired!

Thou art a beautiful friend
In you, is there nothing to amend
You are humble and unassuming
For you, is kindness everything
Neither have you hurt a fly
Nor have you told a lie!!

Thou art a beautiful friend
It is wonderful to have you around
A lot of talent, do you possess
There is hardly anything
Which your eyes miss
Very creative, is your thinking
Especially when it cometh to graphics
Is there anything that you cannot fix?

Thou art a beautiful friend
We share an amazing bond
If there is anything you need
All you have to do, is ask
I promise you, I'll be up to the task!!
Be the way you are
Develop more self-love and self-care
And may the Lord bless you
With loads of happiness, love, peace and prosperity!!
Poem dedicated to Rahul, one of my best friends.
Ashwin Kumar May 14
Thou art an amazing human being
Your poetry is something
That I could go on reading and reading
And never feel bored at all
Because, I love how you make the mighty fall
Showing the world that they truly are
Which is, nothing but a bunch of pretentious bores!

Thou art an amazing human being
Thanks to whom, are things always happening
Always, do you hit the bull's eye
When it cometh to calling out casteism and misogyny
Not to mention, are you incredibly courageous
What you write, has often been called "outrageous"
However, in my opinion
Nothing could ever come closer to the truth
And never have I been prouder of any person
Especially given that, nowadays, is there a dearth
Of truly radical thinkers
With the system, does nobody dare to tinker!!

Thou art an amazing human being
I find your books extremely inspiring
Not to mention, is your activism of supreme importance
Particularly given that, nowadays, very few dare to take a chance
And challenge the existing class and caste structure
A role model are you, for everyone who aspires
To try and bring about a societal transformation
Not to mention, repeatedly have you breached the bastion
Of cis hetero male *******!!

Thou art an amazing human being
Never do you give up on anything
Compassionate are you, to the core
A very caring mother
Who somehow manages to devote time to her children
In spite of being in the midst of so much action
Not to mention, a lot of genuine respect do you have
For your fans and admirers
Something that we greatly love
Oh, and ***** your haters!!
Just be the way you are
And may Jesus bless you, for now and forever!!
Dedicated to my idol Dr. Meena Kandasamy - novelist, poet, translator, academic, intersectional feminist and anti-caste activist extraordinaire.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 15
Thou art my chief source of motivation
Because, never do you show caution
Always, do you speak your mind
To your fire, is there no end
Seriously, are your poems so powerful
That they inspire us to fight
Against the Indian State's sheer might
Your personality is beautiful
Though your writing is fiery
I know you wouldn't hurt a fly
Because, all you want, is social justice
Even if it involves a huge sacrifice!

Thou art my chief source of motivation
And propel me towards action
Whenever I am feeling low
Never are your thoughts shallow
You are a raging feminist
And a compassionate socialist
As well as one of the leaders
In the fight against casteism
Not to mention, an extremely versatile writer
Who blends gender and caste
Romance and escapism
Peace and war
Religion and mass ******
Truly endless, is the list
But we get the gist!!

Thou art my chief source of motivation
Because, whenever you speak
My ears dance with anticipation
And the future suddenly seems less bleak
Always, do you make an impact
In fact, can you even act!!
Of course, suffered have you, a lot
However, you give up not
And most importantly, remind us
To keep doing the right thing always
Even if it ends up killing us!!

Thou art my chief source of motivation
Because you simply have not, any inhibition
You speak what we don't want to hear
And do what most of us fear
Sometimes, are you truly scary
But of course, in a good way!!
So much have you done, for your community
And that too, without any immunity
As can be seen by the sheer amount of hate you've often received
Simply for speaking the truth!!
I must say, hats off to your unwavering faith
You've made all of us proud
May the Lord bless you
With all the love, success, happiness, peace and prosperity in the world!!
Jai Bhim!! Vaazhga Periyar!!
Poem dedicated to one of my idols - author, poet, anti-caste activist and academic Meena Kandasamy.
Ashwin Kumar May 8
Thou art my coolest friend
Always, do you follow the trends
Though you live abroad
With you, never do I feel bored
Always, do you enliven my day
And even help keep my stress at bay!

Thou art my coolest friend
A conversation with you, has almost no end
Patient are you, to a fault
Under pressure, very rarely do you wilt
Never can I imagine you angry
Even when exceptionally hungry!!

Thou art my coolest friend
In you, is there nothing bland
I totally love your photos and reels
They're so good that they nearly feel unreal
A class apart, is your cooking
I could go on eating!!

Thou art my coolest friend
Really, are you a godsend
Because you are sweet as caramel
For you, could I even sing a Christmas carol
Truly, are you such an angel
That, never can you even be touched by the Devil!!

Thou art my coolest friend
Any help, if you need
All you have to do, is to ask
I'll get done the task
Even if I have to die doing it
Just kidding, of course
However, without you, my life just feels false!!

Thou art my coolest friend
When put through the grind
Almost always, do you thrive
Not to mention, are you quite brave
As well as exceptionally smart
Never do you fall apart!!

Thou art my coolest friend
I am yours to command
Because, always is your love and support unconditional
And with you, never can life be dull
I will be with you through thick and thin
After all, you are as good as my kith and kin
So, keep rocking and keep inspiring
May God shower you with a multitude of blessings
And may your life be filled with love, happiness, peace and prosperity!!
Poem dedicated to Shruti, a very very close family friend of mine.
Ashwin Kumar May 10
Thou art my creator
Not to mention, my first teacher
From you, have I learned so much
That it has made me rich
Not in terms of wealth
But in terms of character
Always, have you kept me in good health
And assuaged my doubts and fears
To the greatest extent possible
Thanks to you, do I really believe nothing is impossible!

Thou art my creator
There is so much you have to bear
In order to keep me happy
While I often get snappy
Certainly, have I not been the best son
However, rarely have you been wrong
Always, have you been there for me
Constantly coaxing and cajoling
Scolding and admonishing
And finally
Encouraging and praising!!

Thou art my creator
To me, are you extremely dear
The perfect example of unconditional love
However, at the same time
Rarely have you treated me with kid gloves
Many a time, have you taken the blame
For mistakes I have made
Nevertheless, you are the main reason
For me having a strong sense of right and wrong
You are my moral compass
And whenever there is something amiss
You point me in the right direction
Equally important, are your words of caution!!

Thou art my creator
Not just a mother
But also a friend for life
And my strongest companion in times of strife
With me, have you sometimes been patient to the extreme
You are the beam
Of light that surrounds me from all sides
And ensures I never fade
Often, have you been a mixture of strict and lenient
Sometimes, downright blunt
But you can also be exceedingly sweet
All in all, as a parent
Quite hard are you, to beat!!

Thou art my creator
And quite a colourful character
You are the most precious person
In my entire life
From you, have I learned the most important lessons
Thanks to you, have I been able to ride the rough
And ultimately emerge successful
Finally, I love you above one and all
May God bless you
With loads of love, happiness and peace!!
Poem dedicated to my dear mother
Ashwin Kumar May 15
Thou art my last hope
Do my best I shall, not to mope
Thanks to you, and you alone
Because, you have been through so much pain
Yet, have you always emerged strong
Very rarely, has your judgement been wrong
These days, I seem to be doing nothing right
But thanks to you, do I somehow manage to see the light
You motivate me so much
That I feel like I am on a beach
Watching the waves rise and fall
And being at peace, all in all
Suddenly, do I begin to feel
That the possibility of achieving the impossible is very real
Always, have you been a fighter
Pushing harder and harder
Against the tallest of odds
Carrying an extremely heavy load
On your already weary shoulders
Really, are you a warrior!

Thou art my last hope
Even when there is a queen-sized gap
Between expectations and reality
Never do you think of giving up
Because, so much do you care about humanity
Thanks to you, will I try my best not to give up
Always, do you have the mindset
That there is nothing to lose
And never do you mind, being imperfect
Even when there is everything to lose
You are the person, who puts a smile on my face
During my darkest times
If I emerge successful in life
Remember you I will, for sure
For inspiring me during times of strife
Never do you put on airs
Defined are you, by your humility
Totally can I relate, to your brutal honesty
Truly, are you a lioness
Perfectly fits you, does the Tamil hit song 'Badass'
You are one of the bravest Indian women
A bulwark against upper caste male *******
And in spite of the numerous activities you have been doing
Your maternal instincts continue to remain very strong
Really, are you an allrounder
And I can totally feel your righteous anger
Whenever there is even the tiniest injustice
Above all, do you dream of peace
And a much better world
Well, are you absolute gold
As far as character is concerned
Therefore, you are a person whom I've always greatly admired
Indeed, thou art my last hope
Hence, for you will I always clap
Please keep fighting and keep inspiring
And may the Lord bless you with everything
Which you have ever dreamed of!!
One of many poems dedicated to the extremely plucky author, poet, translator, academic, intersectional feminist and anti-caste activist Dr. Meena Kandasamy.
Ashwin Kumar Jan 2020
Three years of hard work
Three years of patience
Three years of dedication
Where are the rewards?
You talk so much about speed
You talk so much about quality
You talk so much about numbers
Where were you
When the salary was delayed
Every alternate month?
Where were you
When the incentives were delayed
By more than a year?

Three years of hard work
Three years of patience
Three years of dedication
There has been so much
I have put up with
But I do expect something in return
Such as timely payment of salary
Timely payment of incentives
And you have failed to deliver
In all of these aspects
Each of which, is so critical
For a healthy relationship
Between employer and employee
But, are you a good employer?
Looking at the evidence so far
I guess the answer is no

Three years of hard work
Three years of patience
Three years of dedication
The wait has been long enough
I have been extremely patient
But at some stage
My patience is bound to snap
And then, you will hopefully understand
That it may be easy
To lose a good employee
But much more difficult
To find a replacement
And, looking at the speed
At which you pay the salary or incentives
The search will go on and on
Until your wretched company shuts shop
Which is something
That we are all eagerly looking forward to!
Poem dedicated to my boss; known for his legendary salary and incentive delays!!
Ashwin Kumar Feb 2023
You are used to being overloaded with work
That's what happens when you work in a startup
Especially a startup dealing in Recruitment
That too, not run-of-the-mill Recruitment
You specialise in niche roles
Thus, you need to invest a lot of time and effort
In order to pull off closures
Yes, a recruiter's life is never going to be easy
But Recruitment pales in comparison to Research
When you are working on a major research project
You are essentially taking part in an almost never-ending race
Against that elusive devil, Time
A race you can ill afford to lose
And the race track is far from straight
In fact, it is full of twists and turns
Some of them are even more dangerous
Than those hairpin bends you often encounter
While driving up the mountains
There are also numerous obstacles along the way
And to cap it all
There are no prizes for winning the race
On the other hand, if you lose
There will be a stiff penalty
In the form of losing the client, for ever
And what's worse
Is the fact that your credibility will take a massive beating
From which it will be quite difficult to recover
Life will never be the same again
So, you have to win, no matter what
Of course, you are used to working hard
Whether it be Recruitment or Research
So, you put your best foot forward
And work out of your skins
Putting off sleep as much as possible
Even when your body is protesting vociferously
Against this blatant abuse
To add insult to the injury
Your laptop shows you the *******
And your phone literally dies
Sending you into a brainfade
That would have put even Australian cricketer Steve Smith to shame
Luckily, your father's presence of mind saves the day
But your troubles are not over yet
The harder you work
The more confusing the project gets
It's like being trapped in a maze
Except that it's a thousand times worse
Because the maze is controlled from outside
As if it were a puppet
With your boss pulling the strings
Thus, the harder you try to find a way out
The more you get trapped inside
With every passing hour
Hope slowly drains out of you
Until you are forced to admit
That all you can do, is pray
And keep praying for all eternity
Hoping against hope
That Harry Potter and his friends will save the day
Poem I decided to write during one of the most critical stages of a major research project.
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2022
Two days of hard toil
Searching through portal after portal
Company after company
And speaking to candidate after candidate
And what I am left with
Is nothing
Absolutely nothing to show for my efforts
One candidate doesn't find the role exciting enough
Another candidate loses interest
After hearing the name of the client
The next one is not looking for a job in the first place
For the one that comes after
Relocation turns out to be a deal breaker
And the rest of them are simply too busy
Too busy to even pick up the **** phone
However, I decide to keep at it
Only for the rejections to continue
One guy eventually shows a bit of interest
But he has too many questions
Questions that neither I can answer
Nor can my boss!
Of course, Recruitment is never an easy job
Especially when you are working in a startup
But to succeed in Recruitment for Investment Banking roles
You really need to pull off a Harry Houdini!!
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2023
Ever since the movies "Ghajini" and "Anniyan" were released
About eighteen years ago
I was transformed
From an AR Rahman enthusiast
To a Harris Jayaraj fanatic
He is not only a music director
But also an artist par excellence
When you listen to some of his songs
Your feet begin tapping
Right from the word go
Some songs evoke a plethora of conflicting emotions
Happiness, sorrow, amazement, shock
Love, hatred, excitement, a sense of calm
And the list goes on and on
However, the best among the lot
Are undoubtedly the lilting melodies
Particularly the ones sung by Bombay Jayashri
Even the most bitter cynic
Can transform into a hopeless romantic
After listening to such gems
Then there are the "soup songs"
Every man or woman
Who has gone through a heartbreak
Or for that matter, a divorce
Derives a lot of solace from such beauties
Which have the capacity
To tug at your heartstrings
And finally
There are the "kuthu songs"
These will make you dance all night
As if there were no tomorrow
However, more than the songs
It is Harris' background music
Which transports you into a different planet altogether
Many movies which might have flopped otherwise
Have become hits
Thanks to the BGMs
Composed by this incredible gentleman
If movies can be compared with cricket
The actors are the eleven players
With the 12th man being the music composer
And when that composer is Harris
The team's victory is almost guaranteed
Dear Harris Sir, we have listened to your music
For more than two decades
It is our sincere wish and prayer
That you make a strong comeback
Like Australia did against South Africa a few days ago
After being seemingly down and out at one stage
And amaze us all once more
With the kind of magic you used to produce
During your heydays
Something that cannot be replicated
Even by Professor Dumbledore or Lord Voldemort
Dedicated to my favourite musician in India, Harris Jayaraj
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2017
70 years of supposed independence
Yet no real freedom for women
In a society dominated by men
Drowned, is a woman's voice
We need Azadi from Patriarchy
Money and power aren't everything
Without love, life is nothing
Above all, are relationships and life quality
Is there no end to ****?
Why is marital **** legal?
Our system is so feudal
Marriage is such a shame
Marred by domestic violence
Divorce, a traumatic experience
No freedom to choose her career
Family is supposed to be better
No freedom for inter-religious marriage
If she does, it's labelled Love Jihad
Frankly, we are tired
Demand an end to this carnage
She can dress as she pleases
She can roam at night
She can marry anyone she loves
To question her, you have no right
This poem is for all Indian women, and also for men who don't support a system like Patriarchy which promotes inequality and ******* of one gender over the other
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2020
Day by day
I am falling apart
Sinking to new lows
My world crashing around me
I may be thirty years old
But at heart, I am a child
A lost child, seeking reassurance
Seeking sanity, in this insane mess
Seeking happiness, in this tragic story
Seeking an escape, from this hideous cage
After all, what have I done
To deserve this terrible fate?
I did not ask, to bear this burden
On my already weary shoulders
It is quite easy to say
That I will soon be fine
That it is only a matter of time
But, how can I right the wrongs
That I have done
Over the last few hours
In my anger, panic and desperation?
Whether it be shouting at my family
Or breaking my phone screen?
Of course, I can start afresh
My love for my family is real
Irrespective of a few spats
Triggered by being cooped up
In a small house, for two days
After all, these are mad times
You cannot eat at a restaurant
You cannot watch a movie
You cannot attend a poetry event
You cannot even go to a park
But, how long can one remain inside?
In the absence of fresh air
The mind tends to become stale
And therefore prone to meltdowns
Can you then seriously blame me
For flipping out, as I did?
Of course, it is easy to say
That I should be more mature
Given my present age
But then, autism affects you
Irrespective of your age
Anyway, the fight is on
The virus may **** us physically
But it is upto us, to ensure
That it does not **** us mentally
Of course, we have to take a few blows
It is certainly not an easy battle
However, as they say
It is better to try and fail
Than to give up right away
Therefore, whether we win or lose
We will not go down without a fight!!
Poem dedicated to fighting the novel Corona virus.
What a wonderful sister, you are
For you, a lot do I care
Not all the time, may we talk
However, when it gets really dark
You are the light I badly need
Your words of advice, are always to be heeded
And interacting with you is so much fun
That it makes me forget all my pain!

What a wonderful sister, you are
With you around, is there nothing to fear
Indeed, do you have a very calming presence
And gifted are you, with oodles of common sense
No wonder, are you such a fine lawyer
A lot of trouble, do you often have to bear
However, every test do you end up clearing with flying colours
For you, are no circumstances too adverse!!

What a wonderful sister, you are
Grinning was I, from ear to ear
When you arrived a few weeks back
Brought me some respite from work
So thoughtful, was your gift
Truly, do you possess a golden heart!!

What a wonderful sister, you are
And will be, now and forever
Keep smiling and take care
And may you be blessed with a glorious future!!
Poem dedicated to my dear sister Shreeja, who works in London and visited us at the beginning of this month.
Ashwin Kumar Sep 2023
There was a time
When I used to be proud
Of being an Indian
However, that feels like light years ago
Since then, so many things have changed
That I wonder sometimes
If this is indeed the same country
Where I was conceived
Imagine surviving a plane crash
Only to have your face charred in such a way
That it resembles a piece of barbequed meat
And thus even your own mother fails to recognise you
That is the India of today
A democracy only in name
Where the gap between the rich and the poor
Is even wider than the river Nile
The way in which the so-called upper castes
Treat the so-called lower castes
Is even worse
Than the way in which the Nazis used to treat the Jews
Nearly a century ago
Not to mention, to insult a cow
Is considered nothing short of ******
However, harassing a woman
Especially a woman from one of the underprivileged sections of society
Is treated, in the manner in which a simple traffic violation is dealt with
That is, all you have to do; is pay a fine
And you are free to go about doing whatever you were doing
Including harassing more women
Then we come to the small matter of mental health
If you are undergoing therapy or counselling
Or if you are meeting a psychiatrist
As you pass people on the way
You might hear a lot of whispers and murmurs
Making it sound as though you were dying
Or worse, on the verge of insanity
Therefore, whenever you air your views publicly
The chances of people taking you seriously
Are even less than that of Netherlands winning this year's Men's Cricket World Cup!!
It may have been seventy-six years
Since we gained independence
However, the reality is
We are as much independent
As Salman Khan knows how to drive a car
Without killing people in the process
As I mentioned earlier, I used to be a patriot
However, when I think of India now
I feel a remarkably similar kind of shame
That I used to experience during my Engineering days
Whenever I failed in a subject
After all, when your country's international image
Takes precedence over the living conditions of your people
Then it is only a matter of time
Before you are headed down the path of the Nazis
Yes, I am an Indian
And difficult as it sounds to believe, I used to love my country
However, my love for its people
Exceeds that by thousands of miles
A rant about how I used to be proud of being an Indian earlier and what has changed since.
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2022
We work ourselves to death
Day and night
We pay attention to the tiniest detail
And analyse everything with the utmost rigour
We keep putting things off
So that we can give our undivided attention
To the project in front of us
After successfully completing a humongous project
A project that pushed our buttons
And almost drove us to the verge of insanity
We began another project
After the barest minimum of a break
And yet again, we've pushed ourselves
To the very limit
However, you've not uttered a word of appreciation
On the other hand
You only seem to be intent on nitpicking
Correct this, correct that
And blah blah blah
Seriously, what does it take to satisfy you?
Should we sprout wings and start flying?
Or even better, should we wave a magic wand
And cast a spell
To ensure that each and every whim of yours is satisfied?
Poem dedicated to my boss who (it seems) can never be satisfied; as my colleagues and I are working on two successive projects.
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2021
What do you know, really?
About the midnight oil I burn
About the sacrifices I make
About the long waits I endure
As you find numerous excuses
To delay my salary and incentives
About the pain I endure
In order to share resumes on time
Even as my stomach muscles burn

What do you know, really?
About what goes in my work
About the amount of time I spend
With my eyes glued to the screen
Searching every nook and corner
For the ideal candidate
Even as my eyes protest vociferously
About the calls I make
Hoping to convert every one of them
Into a successful lead
But instead ending up in rejections
Even as the pressure mounts on me
To find at least two good resumes
By the end of a long day
A tedious and totally exhausting day

What do you know, really?
About the various situations
I have to deal with in my life
About the efforts I put in
To ensure that work is not affected
At any cost, whatsoever
About my Asperger Syndrome
And the difficulties it puts me in
Whether personal or professional

The list goes on and on
You may be a Founder
And me just a team member
But as far as my ordeals are concerned
What do you know, really?
A rant to my boss about not understanding my side of things.
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2022
What do you really want from us?
We've been working our arses off
For hours and hours
Days and days
Weeks and weeks
Months and months
And we've faced numerous obstacles along the way
Obstacles placed by the market
By the candidates to whom we've been speaking
And by even yourselves!!
In spite of all these hurdles
We've done our best
To ensure that you get the right people
For the requirements you've assigned us
However, the way in which you reciprocate our actions
Is bewildering, to say the least
As far as decision-making is concerned
You're even worse than Hamlet!
You reject a lot of quality resumes
Without any rhyme or reason
You change your requirements
As per your whims and fancies
And then cry foul
When you lose a few good candidates
Due to your inexplicable actions
You put roles on hold at random
And keep the best candidates on tenterhooks
Waiting for an interview that'd never happen
And then blame them for dropping out eventually
You demand resumes at the speed of a cheetah
And provide feedback at the speed of a tortoise
All in all, you ensure that we tear our hair out
By its very roots
Every waking moment of our lives
In order to satisfy every whim of yours
But will you truly ever be satisfied?
Let me ask you again
What do you really want from us?
A rant about an old but troublesome client of mine.
Ashwin Kumar Jan 2023
Failure hurts, no doubt
Especially when you are in Recruitment
A profession which depends on people
As much as India used to depend on Sachin Tendulkar
In the late nineties
But you know what hurts more than failure?
Imagine a T20 match
Where your team has dominated
From start to finish
And still managed to end up on the losing side
Due to a couple of bad *****
From your best bowler
In the very last over
Now, apply the same analogy to Recruitment
You have put your heart and soul
Into a particular mandate
Done a thorough search, through various portals
Called up as many candidates as possible
Presented quality profiles to the client
And lined up interviews one after the other
Everything has been worked out
To the tiniest detail
However, at the eleventh hour
The candidate backs out
Thus, you have no choice
But to start all over again
And this happens not once
Not twice
Not even thrice
But a frigging four times
However, you are no ordinary recruiter
You are a recruiter who possesses the heart of a lion
Thus, you prepare yourself for the long haul
Determined to do whatever it takes
To close this mandate, once and for all
And your efforts do pay off
Or at least, they seem to
For the client, it is a choice
Between two worthy candidates
However, as always, there is a hitch
One of the candidates has started showing signs of cold feet
While the other has to take a pay cut
That too a big one
This mandate now hangs on a knife-edge
So, it is not failure that hurts the most
But coming within an inch of success
After months of hard work
Only to have it slip through your fingers
At the very last minute
Poem about the hurt and disappointment of coming close to closures in Recruitment and then backouts happening at the last minute
Ashwin Kumar Jul 2023
Let's say I am in love with Ms. B
Being a hypothetical situation, there is no need to use proper names
So, here it goes
Dear B,
You mean the world to me
For you, I am willing to do anything
That is, of course, anything ethical
You can rant all day as you like
I will listen, understand and empathise
I can be a shoulder for you to cry on
Your happiness, is all that matters to me
You lose your temper? that's fine
After all, it happens to me too
More frequently that you would imagine
You need some space?
Of course, I will give you space
I understand what it means
To be surrounded by people all the time
And thus end up losing the opportunity
To have some "me time"
After all, not only am I an introvert
I am also autistic
And too much talking often drains the hell outta me
Except when it comes to topics I am comfortable with
Such as trains, Harris Jayaraj music, food, Harry Potter
Agatha Christie ****** mysteries, cricket, tennis
And of course, anything to do with Aishwarya Lekshmi
Anyway, I will do my very best
To make our relationship work
I will always be there for you
Through good and bad times
Of course, that doesn't mean
That I will be overprotective
You must have your independence
I'm pretty sure you can take care of yourself
However, when it comes to a situation
Where you end up biting more than you can chew
You just have to say the word
And I will be at your side
You have a few male friends
With whom you are intimate?
That's completely okay with me
Of course, my best friend is a woman
You should be okay with that
Remember, it works both ways
Then, there is the sheer pain you have to go through
When it comes to having a baby
In order to avoid that, I am open for adoption
Or even test tube babies
Of course, only if you are okay with either option
Remember, I will always love you
Whether you are at your best
Or at your worst
However, I expect the same from you as well
As I mentioned earlier, I am autistic
Which means I am socially awkward
And also socially awkward
Though I come from a vegetarian family
I eat a lot of meat
Chicken, mutton, prawn, pork, beef
You name it, you have it
Of course, unfortunately not within the boundaries of my home
Also, my political views are often radical
For instance, I do not consider Kashmir as a part of India
And I am all for a radical redistribution of power
On the basis of class and caste
Such that the poor and the underprivileged get back what is theirs
In fact, what has been theirs for three thousand years
Also, though I was born a Hindu
I actually pray to Jesus
That is, I have been doing it for the last nine months
But I don't go to church
Nor do I follow any traditions or rituals
Jesus is simply a friend to me
I believe everything will work out eventually
If I place my faith in him
Finally, I am not interested in ***
Except as a means of reproduction
I need emotional and psychological intimacy
I will share everything with you
And I expect the same from you as well
If you are okay with all this
Then we can be a team
Until Death do us part
If you are not okay
Then maybe we can just be friends
If you are not comfortable with that as well
Then we are free
To go our own separate ways
On this note, let me end my musings
And return to reality
Self-explanatory!!!
Ashwin Kumar Sep 24
What if I love you, Ms. V?
It will make me shine like the Sun
Never again, will I be alone
My heart will beat at the speed of an aeroplane
Like a top, will my brain spin
Like a flower, will my face bloom
And from ear to ear, will I beam!

What if I love you, Ms. V?
Talk for hours and hours, we can
About any topic under the Sun
Be it Harris Jayaraj music
Or Indian or international politics
Or chicken vs mutton
Or travelling in trains
And can I go on and on
Trust me, never will I get bored
Of course, neither will you get bored
I will make sure of that
No matter what!!

What if I love you, Ms. V?
A shoulder for you to cry on, will I be
With anything and everything, can you trust me
I keep secrets
As well as Hercule Poirot connects the dots
In any Agatha Christie ****** mystery
And never will I be in a hurry
So, you can take your own sweet time to open up
Or for that matter, can you yap and yap
And I won't mind a bit
After all, every single relationship requires a lot of effort!!

What If I love you, Ms. V?
For you, am I ready to change anything
To ensure you keep smiling
Just not my character or nature, of course
To do anything for you, am I not averse
Just not anything unethical or immoral, of course
I will be there for you on your best days
And of course on your worst days
After all, love doesn't come without its share of pain
And as we all know, there is no gain without pain!!

What if I love you, Ms. V?
Definitely, will it change my life
If you are to become my wife
But yes, not so soon of course
To deciding anything in a hurry, am I averse
I will give you all the time and space you need
It's part of love, will I add!!

What if I love you, Ms. V?
Well, I hope you will love me back
If yes, then will my life be free from anything and everything dark
I will be one of the happiest people in the world
Even all the gold in the world
Cannot give me THAT feeling
Because, to me do YOU mean EVERYTHING
If no, then thank you for giving me the opportunity
To write this piece of poetry!!
I will always write love poetry, irrespective of whether I am actually in love or not!!
Ashwin Kumar May 2018
What is it like, to go hungry?
The wolf in me answers
Starved for hours and hours
There is a storm raging inside
Ready to wreak havoc on all
But especially on those cretins
Who have, in their callousness
Denied me the food
Which I so richly deserved
Leaving my stomach clutching at straws
My tongue lolling around in vain
My teeth sharpening themselves
Ready to tear into the flesh
Of the humans who ignored me
Ready to drink their juicy blood
Ignoring their frantic screams
The wolf yearns to pounce
And devour its tormentors
Until every pang of hunger
Is annihilated once and for all
Trigger Warning: The poem contains a few lines depicting gore and violence. Not recommended for the faint-hearted.
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2023
You are not exactly a sibling of mine
However, you are my sister
And that's all that matters, according to me
What would I do without you?
I rant and rant
Knowing that you are an amazing listener
And a shoulder to cry on
However, it is providing sound advice
Where you are really in your element
Not to mention, you don't beat around the bush
Nor do you sugarcoat things
Both of which, are qualities that resonate with me particularly well
Moreover, you always offer a fresh perspective
Whether it be work or personal stuff
Best of all, though, you are ice cool
I seriously don't know how you manage to do it
Because, in these two months, I've been behind you
And there hasn't been a single week
When you haven't been subjected to a barrage of messages
Would I have taken such liberties with you
If I weren't sure how you would react?
The answer is a resounding no
Moreover, not only are you cool with it
You also come up with solutions
For each and every problem
As I write this, things are looking up
And in no small part due to you
I'm extremely grateful to God
For giving me a sister like you
As I said earlier, what would I do without you?
Poem dedicated to my cousin sister Priyanka.
Ashwin Kumar Oct 2022
At the moment, I am fine
I am part of a rich family
But more importantly, a loving family
I have a decent job
And a stable career
Most of all
I have a few close friends
Whom I can count on, anytime
So, you can say
That my life is pretty much sorted
Except, of course, for a bit of work stress
Which is one of the occupational hazards
Of being a recruiter
So, is there anything missing?
Surprisingly, the answer is yes
Romance
What wouldn't I give
To fall in love?
My heart yearns for that chance
To meet a special someone
Who has the potential
To change my life
In ways that I would least expect
It can be anyone
A friend
A colleague
Someone in my poetry circle
Or for that matter, comedy circle
A friend of a relative
A friend of a friend
Or even a total stranger
Of course, the last option is rather unlikely
Anyway, the point is
I would love the chance
To share my thoughts and feelings
My beliefs and ideas
My darkest secrets
And most importantly
My love and affection
With that special woman
Of course, only if she is okay with it
Because, true love works both ways
Well, it's not like I haven't fallen in love before
In fact, it has happened to me twice
But on both occasions
My love wasn't reciprocated
Therefore, what wouldn't I give
To fall in love once more?
I am keeping my fingers crossed
That it will turn out to be a case of "third time lucky"
Assuming, of course, that it happens in the first place
self-explanatory.
Ashwin Kumar Apr 2021
When will you ever be satisfied?
Work, work and work
That's all you want us to do
Never mind that it's a Saturday
That we have a life of our own
That we have a family
That we've already burned the midnight oil
With no rewards for our hard labour

When will you ever be satisfied?
We all know the famous saying
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
Do you want us all to be Jacks?
Are we humans or machines?
What ever happened to work-life balance?
We work for hours and hours
In front of a computer screen
Is this fair to our eyes?

When will you ever be satisfied?
We handle multiple roles
We handle multiple clients
We run a huge risk
In upsetting a few clients
In order to satisfy your favourite client
But will that particular client
Justify its enormous price tag?

When will you ever be satisfied?
We never get our incentives on time
Yet we rarely complain
We patiently put in all the hard yards
Waiting for months, in vain
At the huge risk of burnout
You will never be able to replace us
Yet your lust for control is such
That you will never be satisfied
This is a rant to my boss who has been driving us mad for the last 4-5 days; including making us work on a Saturday.
Ashwin Kumar Jun 2022
Why does trouble always have to come in twos and threes?
As it is, I am in Recruitment
Which is itself a rollercoaster life
Through the peaks and troughs of Hell
For all my hard work
I get a few scant rewards
Which are like a few drops of water
In the mighty Pacific Ocean
And turn out to be as ephemeral
As the life of a mayfly
Just as I am dealing with all this
My wisdom teeth decide to crash the party in style
Bringing chaos and mass destruction
From all sides
The dentist takes one look at my mouth
And confirms my worst fears
The wretched wisdom teeth have to go
There is no escaping it
Moreover, it has to be a surgical extraction
Why does trouble always have to come in twos and threes?

On the D-Day
My head is spinning madly
My brain is on overdrive
And I find concentrating on work more difficult
Than even predicting the stock market
However, to my pleasant surprise
The surgeon is so calm and reassuring
And the process is so smooth
That is, apart from the pain induced by the anesthetic injection
That I get a feeling as if all my troubles have ended
However, I could not have been more wrong
After a few hours
The effects of the painkiller begin to wear off
Slowly, but surely
Eating food feels more awkward
Than a conversation between a boy and a girl
Who have just broken up
And to cap it all
Talking isn't exactly pain-free either
I might've enjoyed a bit of rest today
But come tomorrow, I need to get back to work
Which involves a truckload of calls
And as per the dentist
I shouldn't talk too much
However, as far as Recruitment is concerned
There is no such thing as "too much"
Why does trouble always have to come in twos and threes?
Poem about my dental fears and struggles, combined with my struggles in Recruitment.
Ashwin Kumar May 2022
Dear Investment Banking
Why do you have to be so difficult?
I spend hours and hours
Days and days
And weeks and weeks
Searching every nook and corner
For some really good resumes
Which are as easy to find
As a drop of water
In the Thar desert
I speak to dozens and dozens of people
Some are not looking for jobs
Some politely decline
Upon hearing the name of the client
Some need time to think
And others don't even bother to respond
It's a cruel world indeed

Dear Investment Banking
Why do you have to be so difficult?
After a lot of frustration and heartburn
And helplessness and desperation in turn
I finally manage to find a good candidate
Who also happens to be interested
However, as expected, there is a catch
He hasn't updated his resume
And by the time he does it
We would have already lost the client
Thus, I have no choice
But to move on
And resume the search
Which is already looking tougher
Than clearing the IIT-JEE!
Dear Investment Banking
Why do you have to be so difficult?
A poem on the difficulties I face in Recruitment for Investment Banking roles
Ashwin Kumar Feb 2022
You know the famous saying
All good things come to an end
This applies to weekends as well
Or in this case, Sundays
Because I was forced to work yesterday
Due to a massive project
Which will keep me occupied
For a good three weeks
Including two Saturdays
Hence, all the more reason
To positively dread the start of tomorrow
Ah yes, the infamous Monday
Something that terrifies me
More than climbing Mount Everest
Or entering a lion's den
Or earning the wrath of a cobra
I can go on and on
But I think I've made my point
Yes, Mondays are bad
Especially if you've enjoyed the weekend
As much as I did
Notwithstanding working on Saturday
So, do you want to know
What makes tomorrow twice as bad
As any other Monday?
Firstly, as mentioned earlier
I am working on a big project
Probably my biggest in the last three years
Secondly, while the going has been smooth so far
Things are going to get tricky
So far, all I have accomplished
Is pure research
But now, I'll have to start calling people
And these are not recruitment calls
Which are relatively straightforward
On the other hand
I am entering pure sales territory
Which may not be a big deal
For most "normal" people
But for someone who is autistic
It is a different ballgame altogether
In fact, it is like steering a ship
Through the Bermuda Triangle
And finally
The biggest roadblock
In my long and treacherous path
Is not the candidates
Not even the client
But my accursed laptop
Whose ability to perform under pressure
Is even less than that of South Africa
In a global cricket tournament
Ashwin Kumar May 2022
We humans have messed around
With Mother Nature and her eco-system
For years and years
Decades and decades
Centuries and centuries
Felling gazillions of trees
Turning forests into concrete jungles
Filling ponds, lakes, rivers and seas
With tons and tons of toxic waste
Releasing enough carbon monoxide into the air
To wreck the entire troposphere
The list of sins against Nature goes on and on
With no end in sight
Given all this, who are we to complain
When Mother Nature has had enough
And unleashes her fury on us
Through earthquakes and tsunamis
Avalanches and volcanoes
Hurricanes and tornadoes
Floods and droughts
And so on
Remember, Mother Nature has blessed us
With oodles of riches
In the form of plants and trees
Mountains and forests
Ponds, lakes, rivers, seas and oceans
And last but not the least, oxygen!
It is time we show her some gratitude
And more importantly, respect and compassion
And stop messing around with the eco-system
Remember the famous old saying
Live and let live
It doesn't mean infrastructure shouldn't be developed
We can build roads
We can build a railway network
We can build houses
We can build schools and colleges
We can build hospitals
We can build libraries
However, as my grandfather used to say
There is a limit to everything
And we should also plant trees
Build gardens and parks
Switch to renewable sources of energy
And cut down severely on emissions
A balance should be maintained
After all, messing around with Mother Nature
Will only bring about our own downfall
There have been enough natural disasters
Caused by human negligence
Let's not add to the list
Which is already longer than the river Nile!
Self-explanatory!!
Ashwin Kumar Nov 25
Wish you a very happy married life
Sure am I, that you will make a great wife
Because I know you very well
You are a **** good girl
Very intelligent and hardworking
Very warm, friendly and caring
Almost nothing, do you lack
Even assuming I am not cutting you slack!

Wish you a very happy married life
Very well, do you handle strife
Extremely cool and composed
So mature and level-headed
Riddham could not have asked for a better partner
Seriously, I do not know who is luckier!!

Wish you a very happy married life
May your sorrows be extremely brief
May your cup of joy get filled to the brim
You and Riddham make a wonderful team!!

Wish you a very very happy married life
Very adventurously, may you both live
Seriously, I cannot wait for your big day
May Jesus keep all troubles at bay
Take care and meet you soon
In the meantime, may you dance under the light of the moon!!
Poem dedicated to my colleague and friend Tamanna, who is getting married on Dec 4th.
Ashwin Kumar Aug 2023
Dear Nithya
Wish you a very very happy birthday!!
I am sure this birthday will be that much more special
Given the momentous event that is going to happen
An event that will change your life for the better
Well, I've known you since I was a kid
Though we haven't met frequently
Nor have we spoken a lot
But I've always been fond of you
You are a very nice person
Very warm, friendly and jovial by nature
You bring a lot of cheer
To everyone around you
Not a single moment with you
Can ever be called "boring"
You are so witty
That the Sorting Hat will scream "Ravenclaw!!"
The moment it touches your head
Also, you are very sensitive
And care deeply about your family, cousins and friends
We've had some great times
Whether it be India, US or Ireland
Coming to Ireland, you were an excellent tour guide
The incredible views of the Pacific Ocean from the Cliffs of Moher
Continue to give me goosebumps to this day
And Glendalough Upper Lake was nothing less than Paradise on Earth!!
Finally, I shall never forget the moment
When we had the finest Irish beer, at Temple Bar
Then, as far as US was concerned
The cruise on Lake Michigan was absolutely unforgettable
As were the views from Hancock Tower
Not to mention, the picnic we had at the Chicago Bean!!
Anyway, coming back to you
I hope you have a day to remember
Wish you loads of love, happiness and merriment
And may the Lord bless you!!
Poem dedicated to my cousin Nithya on her birthday
Ashwin Kumar Mar 2020
Woe betide me
Every day as I wake up
I sniff the air around me
Searching for some hope
In these dark, difficult times
However, like a fly
Buzzing around the dinner table
Hope hovers tantalisingly
Inviting you to make a lunge
Before eluding your reach
At the eleventh hour

Woe betide me
My mood swings like the Sensex
From happy to sad
From sad to angry
From angry to depressed
From depressed to stressed
Like a sine wave
The graph marches on inexorably
With no straight line in sight

Woe betide me
In all my thirty years
I have been through a lot
Depression, sorrow, grief
Heartburn, jealousy, rage
Frustration, stress, guilt
One thing, however, is certain
Anything set in stone
Is less likely to tug at my heart strings
Than something subtle and nebulous
Uncertainty is the worst evil
Like a cunning serpent
It slithers around us silently
Striking when we least expect
Sinking its huge fangs
Into our soft and supple skin
As the poison courses its way
Through our delicate bloodstream
We are ****** into an abyss
Deeper than the Pacific Ocean
And from which there is no escape
We can only pray in vain
As it is only a matter of time
Before our souls are ****** out
Through our gaping mouths
Open, in a silent scream of terror
Of course, we could be wrong
We may wake up tomorrow
And realise it was just a nightmare
Nevertheless, the damage has been done
Things will never be the same again

Woe betide me
Marriage is a dream
For every man and woman
As it heralds a new life
A whole new world
Full of promise and hope
Yes, there are hurdles along the way
But none of them are insurmountable
Now, however, crisis has stuck
Being born autistic is hardly a blessing
Since I am often bamboozled
By people and social situations
However, thanks to therapy
I have ridden the storm
And stayed afloat
Over the last five years
Now, however, I am faced
With something totally out of my control
Thus, all my old insecurities
Largely dormant all these years
Have broken through the dam
Carefully built, through sheer willpower
And flooded my mind, heart and soul
At the speed of light
Thus, I am back
To a place where I was, five years ago
Never did I think
In all these years
That I would return
To the humble abode of Satan
Alas, that's life for you
Handing you the greatest shock
When you least expect it
Woe betide me!!
Woe betide us all!!
This is my poem dedicated to our present times - the novel Corona virus. I have taken a bit of inspiration from Harry Potter and its author JK Rowling.
Ashwin Kumar Nov 2023
There was a time
When I couldn't give a dime
As far as destiny was concerned
How the stars were aligned
It mattered to me not
Even if I suffered a lot

However, as we all know
Times change
We've gotta go with the flow
Facing crisis after crisis
Decided I, to turn to Jesus
Thus, with every passing day
Come what may
More and more did I begin to believe
In the power of Fate
And the miracles it could bring
As we all would be knowing
It's never too late

Yes, believe do I, in destiny
Because, of great importance, is faith
However, it means not
That we do naught
And simply pray to the Lord
Never will inaction beget a reward
Instead, does it mean
That, always should we do our best
And let God take care of the rest
Pardon me for the oft-repeated cliche
But, difficult is it, to carve a niche
Especially when you don't get a chance
To select a topic of your choice

Destiny can favour us
Or can it ruin us
Remember the old but extremely valuable cliche
"There is no gain without pain"
Were we to fight a war
Prepared, must we be, to be slain
Or can we go far
And achieve a glorious victory
Thus, leaving our mark on history
Depends, does it all, on destiny

Take me, for example
I had to go through the ordeal of divorce
It is but completely natural
To believe that destiny favoured me not
Yes, I did have to go through a lot
However, the reality is
Destiny DID favour me
Because, saved was I
From total disaster
And closer did I get
To my sister and father
Not to mention, free am I
To live my life on my own terms

Equally true, is the opposite
It may seem
That, from destiny we benefit
However, turns out instead, destiny is a cheat
For instance, look at the Indian Men's Cricket team
In the recently concluded World Cup
Winning ten matches on the trot
One would have thought
That, destined were we
To lift the trophy
Alas, it was not to be
Lulled were we, into a false sense of security
By all the early *******
And believed, did we
That, on our side, was destiny
However, when it mattered the most
Destiny made sure we lost

Yes, destiny does matter
But your mind shouldn't shatter
Were it to turn against you
Because, it is ultimately YOU
Who are in charge of your life
Even were you to have the best husband or wife!!
Yes, extremely frustrating is it
When things are not in your control
And on your mental health
May it take a toll
However, faith is powerful
Were you to surrender yourself to Jesus
He would make your life wonderful
Of course, certain sacrifices have to be made
But never let your personality fade
And always do your best
Free are you, to turn your back on destiny
As long as you live happily
Yes, destiny does indeed matter
But how much does it matter
Is entirely up to YOU
Poem on what destiny means to me
Ashwin Kumar Nov 30
You are a fun colleague
So happy am I, to be part of your league
Very refreshing, is your attitude
Wonderful, is your aptitude
Great to work with, for sure
Day by day, do you keep getting better and better!

You are a fun colleague
On confidence, are you big
I so love the way you crack conversations
Certainly, are you a new sensation!!'

You are a fun colleague
In almost nothing, do you lag
At times, can you be really commanding
Always, are you **** entertaining!!

You are a fun colleague
Hell, can you even make a Monday morning seem exciting
Because, are you uber cool
And yet, never do you suffer fools
Greatly, do I enjoy talking with you
Sometimes, does it feel too good to be true!!

You are a fun colleague
Never, are you vague
Seldom, do you not speak your mind
In you, is there nothing to amend
Yes, you might be crazy
But that actually makes me happy
I love having lunch with you at the food court
And never can I forget our crazy night
When we danced and danced
Between us, did it create a lovely bond
Hence, do I feel I can tell you nearly anything
Thanks to you, something or the other is always happening!!

You are a fun colleague
With you, can almost anyone get along
Please remain the way you are
Keep smiling and take care
And may the Lord bless you forever
With all that you hold very dear!!
Dedicated to Ritika, my newest teammate.
Ashwin Kumar Feb 20
You are a gem of a friend
Whom it is very difficult to offend
I knew you as a colleague first
Your trustworthiness, is something to which I can completely attest
To work with, were you always fun
Because your mind was always open

You are a gem of a friend
Nothing gets past your clever mind
Not to mention, are you sweet as honey
Talking with you, is something I always enjoy
What I like about you the most
Is the fact, that when it cometh to speaking one's mind
You are undoubtedly one of the best
Because you always stand your ground
No matter what happens
Your courage is indeed immense

You are a gem of a friend
With whom it is not difficult to bond
Usually, no fan am I, of political discussions
However, for you can I make an exception
Imagine the fun we could have
Trashing the central government
I can already imagine your excitement
After all, you never shy away from a debate
A mere spark is enough
For your mind to ignite
Though your voice is the exact opposite of gruff!

You are a gem of a friend
To the world, are you a godsend
How do you manage your kids
Run the house
And work at the same time
Is something for which, an answer one cannot frame!!
Well, I do hope you take a pause
From time to time
Because you are indeed a hard worker
A great conversationalist and listener
And above all, a friend to remember!!
Yes, you are indeed a gem of a friend
With this, shall my poem end!!
Dedicated to Irene, my friend and former colleague.
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