I'm guessing you think that I'll always come back
so you dish out the insults and launch the attacks
without stopping to think "Should I treat him like that?"
then you question the reason I finally snapped?
"If you'd just told me calmly"... you say, with a tone
that suggests that the fault was all mine, not your own.
As if you don't recall that you left me alone
and then told me I'd hurt you, and switched off your phone.
I'm guessing you think that I'll always be there
when you feel like you're drowning and gasping for air,
so when I reach out to you and tell you I'm scared
you just make me feel guilty and show you don't care.
"I can never give you what you want!" you reply.
But that's not why I said it, and so I ask why
you're reminding me of it, with tears in my eyes.
You've no time to explain 'cause you're out with that guy.
I'm guessing you think that I'll always return,
so you don't even bother with trying to learn.
You just tell me you care when it suits you, then spurn
me, then take a step back as you watch it all burn,
and you all stand in line, and you laugh as I call
out for anyone who's left, anyone at all
who can show me I'm wrong, who won't make me feel small.
Yes, you'll all stand in line and you'll laugh as I fall.
A whole lifetime I've spent being told that you care.
A whole lifetime I've spent making good things to share.
Then the one time I reach out, there's nothing but air.
No arms held out to catch me, none of you are there.
You're off with the ones to whom you give control
over all that you do, over your heart and soul.
You told me I'm the one who made you feel whole.
But you've taken with you all the things that you stole.
You've taken my trust and you've torn it to shreds.
You've stolen the good memories from my head
and left me with nothing. So let it be said,
that you can't take my life, for I'm already dead.
That person you all took for granted is gone
now forever. So goodbye, farewell, and so long.
But the shell still remains as his body lives on,
ever-drifting downstream like the widowed old swan.
Separated from faith and from hope once again.
Hatred and disappointment are all that remain,
so you'll all stand in line and you'll watch with disdain;
blaming me, and not you, for you're all just the same!
Now I look in the mirror and all I can see
is the face of a stranger looking back at me.
Just as I see in you, and now I can forsee
that he'll stand in line with you as you all decree
that I always deserved to be left far behind,
and you'll hail this a victory in your own minds.
Celebrating the day that you managed to find
the 'strength' to walk away. But I wonder, in time,
if you'll ever look back and see that you were wrong.
If you'll see it was me who was right all along.
But no matter, my voice is drowned out by the gong
because time's up already, and I'll be long gone.
I'm guessing you think that I say this in spite.
Go ahead, think what you will, believe what you like,
but the truth is while you're sleeping soundly at night
I'm still lost in the darkness, as you were the light,
and you vanished as fast as you came, and so cast
me into the world of shadows, into the past.
But the consequences of your actions will last
for eternity and this pain won't be surpassed.
So go, stand in line with the rest. Follow suit.
They will welcome you, history's newest recruit,
and you'll feast on a banquet of poisonous fruit
borne from the branches of what you impute.
The tree, of a seed planted long, long ago.
Firmly rooted, as old as time. Ever it grows.
It shall never be felled, I am sure. This I know.
So please do me a favour and let's both forego
all the lies, and the promises which won't be kept.
Let's not add to the tears I have already wept.
Don't pretend to me that you've not already stepped
past the point of no return, this I will accept.
So you'll all march in line and you won't hear my call
as there's nothing to say to you, so I withdraw.
Now my memory fades and soon you won't recall
that I ever existed.
I'm nothing at all!
To all the parasites
