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"stairwells" poems
Beauty out in the open, light falls on linoleum tiles like heel-worn stones Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Clotted with conversation, upperclassmen stroll like the elderly Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes - but I know it was I who brought the downpour The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes – but I know it was I who brought the downpour They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Ignorance is bliss, they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Look down, one foot – and then the other! Ignorance is bliss they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. Anger and sadness, guilt and fear turn like Viewmaster slides lit up by the sun Or am I on my own here? Each boy's path runs along each other like long-exposure stars, leaving streaks between the darkness.
0
Jun 26, 2010
Jun 26, 2010 at 10:48 PM UTC
Repercussions.
Beauty out in the open, light falls on linoleum tiles like heel-worn stones Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Clotted with conversation, upperclassmen stroll like the elderly Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Windows to a sunny world sit at the end of locker-lined tunnels, beckoning beyond fluorescent mazes Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Young blood doge or cling to the sides, scared of the critical runway that is us Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Eyes from all sides, thinking nothing yet are supplied by our own thoughts Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Finding refuge in educational terrariums, an ecosystem that saves me from the weight Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank Finding solace in stairwells, sealed off by doors and hold awkward opportunities Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Clanging like a child’s cry releases stress like floodgates, another trip into the shark tank The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Open doors that are actually closed; they are like aquariums – no tapping on the glass please. Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes - but I know it was I who brought the downpour The longer I stay the more I wish to leave, away from substituted confrontations Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Prejudice like heavy rain beats at my skin and soaks my clothes – but I know it was I who brought the downpour They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Must comparisons be so obvious when I walk alone, unprotected? They are lucky to have such equals to act as parents; they hold each other’s hands to keep from drowning Ignorance is bliss, they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. They pull like vultures at flesh; I am not allowed to wrap myself in hurricanes while out in the open Look down, one foot – and then the other! Ignorance is bliss they say, and truth that is here – the less you know the less hate you bear the weight of. Anger and sadness, guilt and fear turn like Viewmaster slides lit up by the sun Or am I on my own here? Each boy's path runs along each other like long-exposure stars, leaving streaks between the darkness.
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29
Empty classrooms Filled with sunlight Vacant stairwells Accompanied by cobwebs Busy city streets filled with Rushing  people And loud children   Deserted parking lots With nothing except   Bottle caps And lonely pocket change Placid libraries With abandoned chairs and desolate books Familiar neighborhoods and childhood streets Thoughts of you String along with me Everywhere I go
0
Sep 2, 2013
Sep 2, 2013 at 1:45 PM UTC
Moments
3:8:15 - Kosher pinot noir toasts the snowflakes that the eider brings, just as the Ash bows ache; naked and starving. Hurdling through old bedroom windows, giving those reasons why pennies are wished first into window wells. Smoggy gawkers, locked into an image shaped by organic lines and gestures. The two smoker- cure their hours reconnoitering in skyrise stairwells, discussing recipes for fixing wounded hearts without the peaceful frequencies she speaks into two styrofoam cups with strings pierced through their innards. Much like the story of how two people meet within the timespan of the living. Even the Moon Men eat space cakes to loosen their chests, from the apathetic laws that began to govern their personalized truths. Not a mug with a name on it bought after an almost very cool free-art reenactment of Pirates of the Caribbean. Love is not a sentence I can choose not to awaken. It's the difference between having a one night stand rather than keeping a toothbrush at each other's places. Even on a Saturday night, we could fasten ourselves to one another. Even if it's only you and I, who are you to say it's not a party.
0
Mar 8, 2015
Mar 8, 2015 at 9:47 AM UTC
BREAKING NEWS: Mandy Patinkin May Be Black
You followed down through the gathered pages to the  labyrinth that leads back through the changes A long and twisted line of unmapped rivers, *** holed low-roads and tattered mileposts glancing homeless back-alleys as dark as lonely crossroads Past the broken wings that fell from skyward treetops scattered feathers amongst rose petals wilted at the hand of tear stained faded photos of frozen black and white faces; hidden ghosts in the closet that fell from grace The pathway narrows where the traces dissipate passing under burning bridges, beneath locked stairwells A fickle feather floating upon rivers ragging like the hubris disconnectedness of time rolling out to sea ― Shadows growing darkest as you reach the blackest silence and you kept the answers to all the questions at arms length hidden in the darkness ― where you saw love disfigure me It was then and there I knew I'd dreamed of someone like you looking for someone more than I could ever be Just an unsated curiosity,    trying to see beyond your own misunderstanding,   to feel and touch an unknown depth beyond  reach As sunset pales the distantness, the night is yours alone when  tomorrow's  morning  rain hangs  on  the  falling  leaves       ―       I’ll  be  gone Just a wayfaring loner in a lonely world Where rivers are only water                                          and love was once a flowing river I thirst to swallow ―                                           to wash away these tracks of my tears ...                                       rivers ... 2017
0
Oct 12, 2017
Oct 12, 2017 at 11:58 AM UTC
The tracks of my tears
You followed down through the gathered pages to the  labyrinth that leads back through the changes A long and twisted line of unmapped rivers, *** holed low-roads and tattered mileposts glancing homeless back-alleys as dark as lonely crossroads Past the broken wings that fell from skyward treetops scattered feathers amongst rose petals wilted at the hand of tear stained faded photos of frozen black and white faces; hidden ghosts in the closet that fell from grace The pathway narrows where the traces dissipate passing under burning bridges, beneath locked stairwells A fickle feather floating upon rivers ragging like the hubris disconnectedness of time rolling out to sea ― Shadows growing darkest as you reach the blackest silence and you kept the answers to all the questions at arms length hidden in the darkness ― where you saw love disfigure me It was then and there I knew I'd dreamed of someone like you looking for someone more than I could ever be Just an unsated curiosity,    trying to see beyond your own misunderstanding,   to feel and touch an unknown depth beyond  reach As sunset pales the distantness, the night is yours alone when  tomorrow's  morning  rain hangs  on  the  falling  leaves       ―       I’ll  be  gone Just a wayfaring loner in a lonely world Where rivers are only water                                          and love was once a flowing river I thirst to swallow ―                                           to wash away these tracks of my tears ...                                       rivers ... 2017
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31
Billy arrived when the sky was all ****** "Sailors take warn Red sky at dawn." He never was a sailor and he never awakened so early. He stopped for a coffee at a Brew and Blue This is when he met Rainbow - a hippie child all stunted and rude. "Enlightenment will never be mine" Billy muttered as he climbed into the orange booth. Eying Rainbow's ***** Rainbow looked him over she had seen one too many dusty would be sailors. But something about his manner-gave her hope for something that mattered. They looked into each other's eyes to find two companions without disguise. This rather shocked them into disbelief but life takes twists and turns definitely different than whatever we expect. Billy was a screenwriter's son with wealth and health Abandoning all fantasy he claimed he rode the rails in order to be free. Rainbow raised by a bipolar soul, who claimed never to know, wandered aimlessly with no where to go - she had slept in stairwells of stranger's homes - till mother's flip was over and she was taken to the car - her new home, again. Billy and Rainbow, as ridiculous as it comes, tried to deny it, but knew they had already begun. It has slipped their minds they were lovers from kingdom come. Billy left and went searching for other scars. Rainbow sat on her porch and searched the stars. The train blew its whistle at the crossing and the rains began to come. A week later, Billy was back setting up a home, waiting to find Rainbow who had hit the road searching for Billy, that lost soul. They both remembered what had slipped their minds being together was one moment when life was kind.
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Nov 20, 2013
Nov 20, 2013 at 2:09 AM UTC
Billy arrived when the sky was all ******
Billy arrived when the sky was all ****** "Sailors take warn Red sky at dawn." He never was a sailor and he never awakened so early. He stopped for a coffee at a Brew and Blue This is when he met Rainbow - a hippie child all stunted and rude. "Enlightenment will never be mine" Billy muttered as he climbed into the orange booth. Eying Rainbow's ***** Rainbow looked him over she had seen one too many dusty would be sailors. But something about his manner-gave her hope for something that mattered. They looked into each other's eyes to find two companions without disguise. This rather shocked them into disbelief but life takes twists and turns definitely different than whatever we expect. Billy was a screenwriter's son with wealth and health Abandoning all fantasy he claimed he rode the rails in order to be free. Rainbow raised by a bipolar soul, who claimed never to know, wandered aimlessly with no where to go - she had slept in stairwells of stranger's homes - till mother's flip was over and she was taken to the car - her new home, again. Billy and Rainbow, as ridiculous as it comes, tried to deny it, but knew they had already begun. It has slipped their minds they were lovers from kingdom come. Billy left and went searching for other scars. Rainbow sat on her porch and searched the stars. The train blew its whistle at the crossing and the rains began to come. A week later, Billy was back setting up a home, waiting to find Rainbow who had hit the road searching for Billy, that lost soul. They both remembered what had slipped their minds being together was one moment when life was kind.
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67
My heart has been invaded. Alarms sound through the open hallways And echoing spiral stairwells. I hear the tread of a thousand-man army Trudging through liquid and flesh To capture my precious Love, The Love that has been locked away in a tower Safe from the outside world. Call 911 - This is a real emergency. Fear creeps up my spine As the shadow looms in the distance And my days are numbered. The army closes in with a fatal lullaby, But to my surprise The figure emerging from the mist Is no heartbreak militia, But instead A girl. Just about my height Face to face. Flower petal lips and hummingbird heartbeat. Deep brown eyes glance through feather-lashes And I am smitten. If my invader is here to kidnap Love from her tower, Love would go willingly. A dream-come-true abduction.
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Apr 30, 2014
Apr 30, 2014 at 10:51 PM UTC
Invasion
Father Mychal Judge bent down to the woman on the floor. His right hand made the cross in sign like oft he had before. Above him the North Tower Burned like South Tower just next door. The chaplain of the firemen, Mychal was a Catholic priest. Born and bred in Brooklyn, He was no stranger to these streets. When he heard word about the planes, his safety he ignored.. He had to go be with his boys His trust was in the Lord. The people in the towers had the choice to burn or fly. So many that day took the plunge preferring not to fry. The raging fires melted steel. South Tower started to collapse The Bravest in her stairwells never heard recall perhaps. “Sweet Jesus, Make this end now! ” Some heard  Father Mychal cry. Debris from the South Tower Like a scythe came flying by. It was blunt force trauma to the head laid Father Mychal low. His friends removed his body, before North tower , too, would go. Thousands passed that terrible day; the mighty and the small. When responders came with body bags Mychal was first of all. Zero Zero Zero One A strange number for a Priest, who rushed in where many others fled, May now he rest in Peace.
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Nov 19, 2011
Nov 19, 2011 at 6:43 PM UTC
First Fruits, a poem of 9-11
This is the machine. Tucked under necklaces, poppies and daffodils calligraphic fingertip Xs hurry across pockets. Thursday morning job postings markers on construction paper windows exhausted by making parts. Keep weddings in thunderstorms to hide the sound of windmills in chests, bittersweet directions to ticking clockwork. Carbonated water can’t convince summer to stay, musical breaths and tulip footsteps remind me of the gears in my knees. Always buy wallets used daylily bank notes folded into stairwells, the heels of my socks. Blue collars in ochre wheelbarrows soaking next to the white ones. We are quiet machines. With cogs in our wrists battery powered bone and sinew. Baby’s breath white in our hair, tiny bunches piled into collar bones or concave stomachs. You have stars in your hair whispering in manufactured voices to pull out your eyelashes. Consumed by the concept of concepts on ravine park benches, marred with newspaper labyrinths smelling of rolled up sleeves. Hand held gummy bears prompt me to check my fluid levels, bubbly orchids in my left palm. Sugar intakes and patterned pants hide homemade pulses. This is the machine.
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Jun 1, 2013
Jun 1, 2013 at 12:14 PM UTC
This is the machine
There was a squandering ember that climbed her spinal chord and lit the deteriorating birchwood on the peach-fuzzed tea lamps. When those stairwells cramped and swelled with staggered liquid terraces in the foundational pin-cushion that cradled family after family. Woe begone chants that railed support beams moaning under elemental abuse. A litter of ghost kittens coiling underfoot where the rug used to yawn before the grandfather clock, now senile and rotting with absent-minded tick-tocks. Inside her streetcorner, the music was that monkey hopping to street ***** blue notes on somber ropes. The air thick with the regal, chunky vibe of batting eyes, flirty sighs, and bourbon. Between the buildings again... embraced with the same warm feeling that entrances your fingertips, lips, and ears when within a man's arms. In this city, Love is those two birds on that same powerline that bowed and ebbed with summer's sweet sigh.
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Sep 23, 2011
Sep 23, 2011 at 11:47 PM UTC
My Love for NOLA
He loved to teach... He loved to teach her... He loved to teach her abject lessons       in elevators and on stairwells. She hated to learn... She hated to learn from him... She hated to learn from him the inherent        danger of buildings.
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Dec 3, 2019
Dec 3, 2019 at 2:32 AM UTC
The Inherent Danger of Buildings
Am I lost? The hallways and corridors looking the same Each floor looking like the last Stairwells that go to certain floors, instead of every floor The endless wandering Is there even an exit?
0
Dec 10, 2012
Dec 10, 2012 at 5:12 PM UTC
Wandering
She watches a drama on the television calendar pages flying from time’s prying fingertips showing her, reality is slower, trudging , dragging in its pain; she paces quietly, wandering down lonely stairwells of her memory, her feet shuffling, slipping on loose tiles of broken promises. the floor is covered in his tracks, decaying leaves of fickleness, letters of blotted ink, thick gray scratches;  his unsaid goodbye, lingering heavy and stale, the air filled with the smell of him, scents of his self doubt and insecurity.
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Jul 26, 2011
Jul 26, 2011 at 1:44 AM UTC
Nostalgia
it’s inevitable we are two waves crashing upon one another from diverse directions 6 feet overpowering a near five an abundance of sand collected in her toes, painted sunset in season salt in the crevices of his cracked lips                        he hasn’t drank since March wildflowers on her dress and holes in his shoes it’s faulty we are racing towards riverbanks: barefoot, unsteady, and homely this doesn’t feel like home he’s a moonlit tower, prewar stairwells, and a bright white nail bed she secretes meteors in her pockets and a jackknife slopes and curves and hills to stumble words and doorknobs and photographs to wonder it’s vexed we headline in bold faced Georgia friends concerned themselves with each petty fight         oh, boy did we fight until her tongue wore out his palms scratched to be healed by hers her mother was on board, she guessed; his mother said yes it’s bereft we’re naked on the South lawn a rose brush picked, prodded, called to question her hazel eyes lack the ability to cry and cry and cry his voice, stripped of rage politics behind the scene a young widow’s desperation for peace it’s mass-produced we’re political maps facing the chalkboard colored crayons and heel-high socks pepperoni’s dot her pizza the way she dots her i’s                        as she writes lyrics of you he raids the kitchen for her, prying the fridge for her glinting sparkles in artificial light it's submitted we’re chipped steel bracelets her straw bends forward at a crease they didn’t realize what factors meant                                      his version too close to candor yielded, the missing L on a paper sign a stranded guitar pick balancing atop city grates and a below ground maze it’s whatever it may be and may be whatever it’s but she and he and I and you we perch on seven lines of fact like birds we wallow, and trees we droop ‘til the ending sunrise where you figure the truth
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Aug 23, 2014
Aug 23, 2014 at 8:03 PM UTC
I and you
it’s inevitable we are two waves crashing upon one another from diverse directions 6 feet overpowering a near five an abundance of sand collected in her toes, painted sunset in season salt in the crevices of his cracked lips                        he hasn’t drank since March wildflowers on her dress and holes in his shoes it’s faulty we are racing towards riverbanks: barefoot, unsteady, and homely this doesn’t feel like home he’s a moonlit tower, prewar stairwells, and a bright white nail bed she secretes meteors in her pockets and a jackknife slopes and curves and hills to stumble words and doorknobs and photographs to wonder it’s vexed we headline in bold faced Georgia friends concerned themselves with each petty fight         oh, boy did we fight until her tongue wore out his palms scratched to be healed by hers her mother was on board, she guessed; his mother said yes it’s bereft we’re naked on the South lawn a rose brush picked, prodded, called to question her hazel eyes lack the ability to cry and cry and cry his voice, stripped of rage politics behind the scene a young widow’s desperation for peace it’s mass-produced we’re political maps facing the chalkboard colored crayons and heel-high socks pepperoni’s dot her pizza the way she dots her i’s                        as she writes lyrics of you he raids the kitchen for her, prying the fridge for her glinting sparkles in artificial light it's submitted we’re chipped steel bracelets her straw bends forward at a crease they didn’t realize what factors meant                                      his version too close to candor yielded, the missing L on a paper sign a stranded guitar pick balancing atop city grates and a below ground maze it’s whatever it may be and may be whatever it’s but she and he and I and you we perch on seven lines of fact like birds we wallow, and trees we droop ‘til the ending sunrise where you figure the truth
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49
From the throne the broken and dying came to me twisting and contorted riving in agony dripping down dark stairwells to me their vertebral blooded end In the time of the lizard king so much ****** ****** has been committed even some of my own were poised to fight yet I told them to hold there ground and wait This never ending war this fight without retreat battle hardened with fight we sing to the defeat of the lizard king I kiss and tend the wounds of the fallen with all I have I heal them and give them love and when evil comes to my domain I will smite all their armies Sweet saviors I make in a blink of an eye words of the last I do sing by all I own all empires I will bring to the defeat of the lizard king By Christos Andreas Kourtis aka NeonSolaris
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Jun 1, 2016
Jun 1, 2016 at 4:05 AM UTC
In The Time Of The Lizard King
I'm feline in my approach slender-sleek and silent footsteps like ghosts on stairwells and whispers in your ears. I have nine lives and I've wasted them all stalking you through concrete jungles and labyrinthian words and feelings.
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Sep 23, 2012
Sep 23, 2012 at 10:27 PM UTC
Felis catus
Encroaching satellites High voltage saturation and shade And an obtuse synopsis of cognitive psychology Condensing your threshold Searching for hand outs Ripping the railings out of the walls In the stairwells in the doctor's office on the way to your colonoscopy   Laying on the futon with and your therapist writing down everything you say "Go on" "Mhm" "I see" "How does that make you feel?" Skid-marked underwear Delving, dumpster diving for food In the lonesome twilight In the rippling rainstorm People shelling out gripes Squinting, doing a double take at you Followed by a wavering tumult They're gonna have you capped That is, unless you purchase this love seat -Tommy Johnson
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Jul 15, 2014
Jul 15, 2014 at 11:04 PM UTC
Psychoanalytic Mumbo Jumbo
I'm walking down the cafeteria hallway holding a laptop that took twenty minutes to fix. I spot her packing up her possessions from the table, everything too spread out for her not to have eaten alone, but she's smiling as usual and it spreads to my lips. I hear my name and I stop not because someone was talking to me but because they were talking about me something that never happens or never used to until they started to see who I really was and fall in love with that- Clapping me on the shoulders, sending me emails, adding me on Facebook congratulating me publicly giving me hugs stopping me in the hall turning history into a discussion about me being a superhero for those in need of help. all because I have developed the guts to say something or rather, write something nobody else admits to being able to say. My name comes from that table on the left up against the lockers first seat on the far end after the bar my old seat, for two years. It's those memories that have allowed me to say what I've said- those memories of losing everything of rebuilding, from scratch of having my lips bleed because they are so unused they crack of finding the darkest emotions and recovering. I walk five more feet and turn right. She looks up as I approach. I hand her her laptop and charger, smiling as she is. always is, always has been. "It's done, it works" I say, enthusiastically. Her eyes widen in surprise "really?" I nod "it only took a few minutes, it should be better" she scoops up her stuff and we walk away from that place together as we always used to, freshman year when our round table sat in that exact spot. But three years have changed a lot: she's smiling in my presence and we split, heading opposite directions. her to her locker me to the library. I hear the faint words "merci beaucoup" as I pass the 3rd post And for a second, I want to turn back. To walk with her like I used to her but actually talk to her. I continue walking. "Four years change a person" I think as I climb every stair as I have, for four years. I stop for a second, three quarters of the way up and watch the way the sunlight drifts in from the door window. A beauty I never would have seen then. I would have been too entranced in her and now I walk alone. I would have been far too depressed by my own problems to say what I have. I may be a stronger person a better person than sitting there at that round table but I always someone then. Now I stand in stairwells alone
0
Mar 30, 2013
Mar 30, 2013 at 4:16 AM UTC
Four Years
I'm walking down the cafeteria hallway holding a laptop that took twenty minutes to fix. I spot her packing up her possessions from the table, everything too spread out for her not to have eaten alone, but she's smiling as usual and it spreads to my lips. I hear my name and I stop not because someone was talking to me but because they were talking about me something that never happens or never used to until they started to see who I really was and fall in love with that- Clapping me on the shoulders, sending me emails, adding me on Facebook congratulating me publicly giving me hugs stopping me in the hall turning history into a discussion about me being a superhero for those in need of help. all because I have developed the guts to say something or rather, write something nobody else admits to being able to say. My name comes from that table on the left up against the lockers first seat on the far end after the bar my old seat, for two years. It's those memories that have allowed me to say what I've said- those memories of losing everything of rebuilding, from scratch of having my lips bleed because they are so unused they crack of finding the darkest emotions and recovering. I walk five more feet and turn right. She looks up as I approach. I hand her her laptop and charger, smiling as she is. always is, always has been. "It's done, it works" I say, enthusiastically. Her eyes widen in surprise "really?" I nod "it only took a few minutes, it should be better" she scoops up her stuff and we walk away from that place together as we always used to, freshman year when our round table sat in that exact spot. But three years have changed a lot: she's smiling in my presence and we split, heading opposite directions. her to her locker me to the library. I hear the faint words "merci beaucoup" as I pass the 3rd post And for a second, I want to turn back. To walk with her like I used to her but actually talk to her. I continue walking. "Four years change a person" I think as I climb every stair as I have, for four years. I stop for a second, three quarters of the way up and watch the way the sunlight drifts in from the door window. A beauty I never would have seen then. I would have been too entranced in her and now I walk alone. I would have been far too depressed by my own problems to say what I have. I may be a stronger person a better person than sitting there at that round table but I always someone then. Now I stand in stairwells alone
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77
If I did go wrong more or less at once, I wonder where The chop block decisions of grade school, when you first realize you don’t care ‘I just don’t care’ in whiney and off-pitch voices and messy drawers Was it the first time you realized you couldn’t be perfect and so just stopped Being Was it sneaking on to computers and secretly learning more about life in books than your Parents wished you to ***** things) Or was it when you learned because you shouldn’t And didn’t learn and didn’t learn, and that persistent bubble as you grew up got bigger and bigger Some looming threat about your future dangled over your animal head like a carrot as you trotted through worksheet a, a-2, a-3 And exercises you could finish in two minutes or two hours and get the same grade Or copy and get the same grade And those grades mattered more and more, and vaguer and vaguer And they guided you less as they shoved more in front of you and grabbed your nose to say This is important, this is you And your friends started laughing like lunatics as well as ******** And the first kids ended up crying in stairwells And you slept in class? Was it all that, or was it outside. Was it your parents admitting they weren’t happy. Was it the first time you had to recognize dishonesty or cruelty in others (you had long since seen it in yourself) Was it the first time you wanted to die. Is it now?
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Sep 19, 2013
Sep 19, 2013 at 1:13 AM UTC
Application Anxiety
**** sonnets she screamed, half awake,, raspy broken chords **** mistletoe He responded, barely breathing, words are a chore **** surrender She moaned, lonely against the canvas of silver and gold **** alarm clocks He smirked, craving the fabric and minutes to unfold **** ghosts She whispered to the abrupt emptiness of 4 in the morning **** stairwells He mumbled to the steps that tripped without warning **** forever she breathed, breathless against the waves of waterfalls **** sidewalks He admitted as he wandered aimlessly appalled **** flowers she scowled at the precipice of tomorrow **** candles He gritted at the concept of unrequited sorrow **** Thursday she exclaimed at the notion of fresh beer blossom gardens **** July He exhaled against the women who dressed without pardon **** Twitter she tweeted three nights deprived of sleep **** Xanax he stumbled five Klonopin deep **** stars she wished with a mouth of cigarettes and strangers **** memories he insisted accompanied by potions and danger **** you She would have laughed against the midnight canvas **** me He would have crafted versus the twilight lanterns
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Mar 18, 2013
Mar 18, 2013 at 9:47 PM UTC
Greyson
I saw a necklace I thought you'd like. I still like the sound of your name even though it hurts to say. I never liked it on anyone but you. The healing bracelet you gave me has been in my jewelry box for 13 months. I wore it every day for more than a year I haven't seen or spoken to you since Marie's birthday September 9th I wonder if losing you was part of my healing or yours. Do you still dance to Florence & the Machine? Do you still tell our stories? Remember Stab Wound Guy and the time we took videos of each other throwing up in the same weekend and it wasn't revealed until brunch the next day? Or the cab driver that said "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" is the most romantic song? What do you tell our friends when they ask where I've been? I can't forgive you for saying I would have been ***** even if I hadn't come to Chicago. I can't forgive you for saying you needed me. You held me crying on your bathroom floor. Do you know I got a cat? When was the last time you saw your sister? I was never more honest than when I was with you. Secrets in stairwells. I don't look at our pictures. I dreamt I saw you and you looked away. I only speak about you gently. I still think about you daily. You are one of three things I wouldn't change about my time in Chicago. You taught me how to eat an artichoke and how to survive. Just so you know, I'm okay. I wish you could see me smile now. I still wish I knew how to thank you or if you know I'm sorry. What do you remember about me?
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Jan 20, 2015
Jan 20, 2015 at 3:42 AM UTC
Artichokes Remind Me of You
I saw a necklace I thought you'd like. I still like the sound of your name even though it hurts to say. I never liked it on anyone but you. The healing bracelet you gave me has been in my jewelry box for 13 months. I wore it every day for more than a year I haven't seen or spoken to you since Marie's birthday September 9th I wonder if losing you was part of my healing or yours. Do you still dance to Florence & the Machine? Do you still tell our stories? Remember Stab Wound Guy and the time we took videos of each other throwing up in the same weekend and it wasn't revealed until brunch the next day? Or the cab driver that said "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" is the most romantic song? What do you tell our friends when they ask where I've been? I can't forgive you for saying I would have been ***** even if I hadn't come to Chicago. I can't forgive you for saying you needed me. You held me crying on your bathroom floor. Do you know I got a cat? When was the last time you saw your sister? I was never more honest than when I was with you. Secrets in stairwells. I don't look at our pictures. I dreamt I saw you and you looked away. I only speak about you gently. I still think about you daily. You are one of three things I wouldn't change about my time in Chicago. You taught me how to eat an artichoke and how to survive. Just so you know, I'm okay. I wish you could see me smile now. I still wish I knew how to thank you or if you know I'm sorry. What do you remember about me?
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Photographers step out of hazy stairwells, tired eyes adjusting to dim light, looking for their next muse. “Works of art take time” they tell themselves they look for the next spark of intrigue, their next fix. You’ll find them on public transport, in old cafes: cameras slung around their necks like billiard boards captioned ‘the end is nigh’. Buzzing with anticipation of their next good catch, biting the lips of their disgruntled faces like ancient gladiators biting the dust. Castaways, oil paintings once brilliant and beautiful thrown into apartment blocks and grey buildings, ruins of art cast adrift by time. Haunted by still frames and possibilities, all burned onto retinas, they stumble across traffic jams; finding beautiful people, forcing themselves into their lives. Fleeting whispers rotate into double takes and flickers on the film of a Polaroid camera; the subjects become muses, cities are reborn as golden flood into spotlights: vibrant, reckless, insomniac.
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May 9, 2015
May 9, 2015 at 5:32 PM UTC
Bright lights, Big city.
. Father Mychal Judge bent down to the woman on the floor. His right hand made the cross in sign like oft he had before. Above him the North Tower Burned like South Tower just next door. The chaplain of the firemen, Mychal was a Catholic priest. Born and bred in Brooklyn, He was no stranger to these streets. When he heard word about the planes, his safety he ignored.. He had to go be with his boys His trust was in the Lord. The people in the towers had the choice to burn or fly. So many that day took the plunge preferring not to fry. The raging fires melted steel. South Tower started to collapse The Bravest in her stairwells never heard recall perhaps. “Sweet Jesus, Make this end now!” Some heard Father Mychal cry. As Debris from the South Tower Like a scythe came flying by. It was blunt force trauma to the head laid Father Mychal low. His friends removed his body before North tower, too, would go. Thousands passed that terrible day; the mighty and the small. When responders came with body bags Mychal was first of all. Zero Zero Zero One A strange number for a Priest, who rushed where Angels feared to tread, not fearful in the least
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Dec 10, 2011
Dec 10, 2011 at 8:43 PM UTC
Victim 0001, a poem of 9/11
*and there, carved into the oaken doors of the Madhouse, in stark, lifelike detail, three massive cyclones. side by side.  They seemed to sway and beckon as the door began to creak open. "We'll be there soon," the Cyclones harshly whispered to me. "We'll be along shortly, and then we'll rip apart and send you whirling along with  everything you love. Send you whirling to the void, where everything wails and moans, and nothing will ever rest in peace again"*  Madhouse Time for the rain to shine, ways for the moon to rhyme, space for the gods to pine, running through a madhouse with no way to stop.   Cane for the *** to chew, slow when his eyes hit you, rope when the hands push through, skidding on wet floors on the way to the drop. Slip to a diiff'rent side, high on the wind to ride, hope that the tree will hide, stumbling up stairwells to get to the top. Run as the jaws will snap, swing when the wings won't flap, streak when the soles do slap Twilight is closing on the whirlwind's last crop.
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Jul 6, 2012
Jul 6, 2012 at 6:58 PM UTC
Madhouse
for all of us, star-seekers, feeling now alive for those with the ghastly skill of being alone amid crowds of people lost in thought but ok inside for those who see streaks of madness fly round, illume patterns/puzzles grasping scales celestial to infinitesimal for those playing games with reality snogging smug wealthy boys in stairwells oxygen bonds breaking the sublime for those forgotten under dirt, asphalt & spot buried dates and dashes no splashes of memory just naked nihilistic Precambrian bones for those nameless from identity crises smiling glibly through missing teeth embarrassed by circumstance and the folly of age for those trapped in jaunty youthful frames lacking mind's dessert: veneration (contradiction)--still wisdom perilously choked plus feared for those chanceless beings fate sweeps & sooner snips chuckling at theodicies while they still can some soothed by snake oil--I mean Purpose-- then just dying and we're still uplifted? we are still star-seekers. we, divorced from form and aching for the sky's response hear nothing, but we know eyes' lies are all around us and inside they wear us out and keep us moving they are ancient dull clichés, tarnished but they have the audacity to make us shine, aspire they are what your grandma says to get you to behave eyes' lies are true: we are still star-seekers
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Jan 11, 2014
Jan 11, 2014 at 11:27 PM UTC
eyes' lies
Ragged clothes on the sidewalk, toddlers murmur and cry cold morning air where abandoned row houses smell of whiskey, sage, and molded cotton diesel exhaust belches into light breezes forests of burning coffee beans mingle into their hearth, the children, this is their nostalgia everywhere leavings of life scatter driven by wind cover unhoused, distressed, makeshift families they stand shoeless as fortunate people drive past Glut of humanity smells of wet newspaper grey gulls picking at grimy cellophane cardboard litters muddy sidewalks above the billboard the wealthy jeer at them sitting by a liquor store with bars on the windows shut out of row houses with black wrought iron gates basement stairwells filled with trash men in alligator boots ready to lunge into the lives of slick, bright, vacant women this is the fate of feminine mother love Thriving in dead landscapes growing lost opportunity under skyscrapers where it is always almost dusk
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Nov 11, 2017
Nov 11, 2017 at 12:05 PM UTC
Squatters’ Children