One brisk spring afternoon, a boy found himself adventuring down a local forested path. The sun beamed down through the trees, creating golden stips of light that fought their way through the newly grown greenery. The crunch of the earth beneath his feet could be heard from a distance as unimportant thoughts drifted through his mind.
He paused and set himself down on a large rock by a bubbling stream. The water created an ambiance that made a rush of calm flow over his mind. His eyes drifted around a bit, taking in his surroundings when suddenly a butterfly flittered down and flew around his face. A smile spread wide across his features as he lifted up his hand to try to catch it.
The butterfly grazed his hand, but then flew away as fast as it could, as it was afraid of the boy. He frowned in disappointment, wanting nothing more than the butterfly itself to flutter down onto his hand so he could admire it once more; But he was left in despair.
Two more butterflies of the same pattern found themselves drifting along the face of the boy, and he tried to catch them as well, for maybe they would fill in the gap that the first had left. He caught them both, but only briefly, as all butterflies were beautiful, but fleeting.
The boy tilted his head in disappointment, and sat there alone for some time, an array of butterflies coming and going, none of them filling the void left by the first.
Suddenly, a pure white moth came into view.
The boy scowled, unsure of what to make of the moth as it was nothing like the other butterflies that he had encountered before. The moth flittered around his face, and he raised his hands slightly, prepared to swipe the creature away.
The moth found itself landing softly on the nose of the boy, its fuzzy little wings tickling his skin upon contact.
He couldn’t help but smile, but felt a little uneasy, as he was only used to butterflies.
The boy lifted the moth gently from his nose, and perched it on a nearby branch. It’s little wings lifted its body from the perch, and tried to fly back toward the boy, but he gently shood the creature away. Finally, it gave up and landed itself back onto the branch in which the boy had placed it. There the moth stayed, watching the boy chase butterflies endlessly until he could chase no more.

The water surrounding me stings like a million Pinpricks as I get plunged back into a time that I remember as Us.

Memories flow in like a clear pool of what once was as I sit back in emotional Paralysis, wanting nothing but to crawl out the damaged abyss of my once beautiful mind, now crooked, and corrupt

I still remember the day you left me. The feelings and the fears that engulfed the entirety of my soul.

I sat there for hours trapped inside my own mind scratching violently at the walls of my very being, drawing my own blood as the weak attempts to escape my mind proved futile.

My blood curdling screams could be heard by nobody except myself as my jagged claws slashed ferociously through the flesh of my consciousness, wanting desperately to escape myself with no avail.
Devastating defeat washed over me as the warm waters of the bathtub in which I am now trapped, leaving me with nothing but a sense of loneliness and fear.

My head sinks slowly into the warm water, allowing the sweet blur of darkness to crowd my eyes, forcing them shut. My crimson locks crawl about my face, staining the water around my features a ****** hue that simulates my deepest desire.

Now having tasted the deceiving flavor of defeat my body lays alone under water, wanting no longer to crawl away from my mind,
For it is all I have left in the dark world in which I have peacefully Succumb to.

Like a cloud of magic
Lives can be changed in an instant.

Once the bottle is grasped
Your past can disappear in seconds.

Ones head seems to buzz
Reality masked by a shield of smoke.

A father, lifting his child
Smiles and laughs, holding him close.

His first day of school
New and different, a milestone in life.

The child giggles then winces,
Smelling the cloud of poison on his fathers breath.

His mother cries,
Wondering who it was she knew as her husband

Did he like me sober?
Or only when he had his walls of smoke protecting him.

Time will pass,
Years turn to months turn to minutes turn to seconds

The last fluctuation on the line
The red movements go still
Just like that he’s gone.

A boy walks down the path to his diploma.

His mother waves in the distance, proud, yet alone.

The boy giggles, for the first time in a while, he is happy.

A familiar smell wafts into the room.
A young man fidgets with his emptying pack of cigarettes.

The boy stops dead in his tracks.
He winces.

My wings were once gold and full
Until my feathers they started to pull.
I’d give them away too,
But mostly just give them to you.
My feathers were priceless.
They helped me to fly.
Now I’m stuck on the ground,
With everyone wondering why.

It truly is the sweetest thing
A soft Caress
A light brush of skin
A Tender kiss that melts into a smile
Such a firm Desire I have
For that of Gentle Love

I loved you yesterday. Before I saw you. It has been more than a month without you, which hurt more than I expected. The weeks went by, painful and lonely. They felt like decades without your presence, until yesterday. Once I saw you, that time melted away. The suffering, the loneliness, it all just vanished. Once I looked into your eyes it felt as though I had seen you just yesterday. your familiarity, your touch, they all seemed so recent, so comforting. Weirdly enough it wasn’t the home cooked meals, or the family gatherings that made me feel at home again. It was you, when I had gone to visit. I loved you yesterday, but I love you more today. And I know next time I see you, the same will happen.

I see it.
           See through it.
              See far beyond it.
                   I see it.
          The mask in which you wear when you are around them
                         The people who pretend to be there for you
The ones you can “Talk to”
            But when you try you can’t.
You Can’t talk
          You Can’t Confide
        You Can’t let Go.
       I see it.
                           The mask you secretly desire to remove
                       The mask you have been wearing for so long,
                           you can’t tell if it even is a mask anymore
                          You can’t tell if it is the real you or not.
                You Can’t tell.
                   You Don’t Know
                       You Still Care
                          I see it.
                          There are people around who are like you.
People who pretend and live behind masks they create for themselves    
                                               so others don’t see
        People who can help
    People you can trust in
                  People who want to speak
            These people are numbered in few
I see it.
I see it.
      Why Don’t You?

Street lights shone down on the curvy silhouette of a black corvette. The reflection of the road side glistens off of the flawless Chrome coat of the vehicle. The engine roars at the slightest touch of the gas petal as my father turns to me from across the table.
"It sounds amazing doesn't it."
I nod my head in agreement as another beauty of a vehicle passes by us. A porche convertable glides smoothly across the pavement with a purr slightly different than the corvette that had passed before hand.
"I like that one better though, don't you?"
I shrug my shoulders. The cars were undoubtably impressive and incredibly expensive. They were beautifully tailored without flaw, but for some reason I felt nothing toward them.
A strange smile spread across my face and my father looked at me confused.
"Why are you smiling?"
I looked down at my hands and thought for a moment to myself, not allowing much to slip out as I thought of one specific car that I really loved.
"I don't know...I like the sound of trucks better"  
I say looking down at my hands, remembering.

The want now has started
The need began creeping
Now all that’s on my mind
Is you and me sleeping
Just us together
No one else around
Pure serenity and pure love
Happily to you, I am bound

I know that words don’t break the skin
But the walls of my heart are wearing so thin
They’ve been scratched at and rattled beyond ones belief
It seems that no person can offer relief
Because when those words hit my ears
My mind always delves into my darkest fears
Of being taken advantage of, hurt, and worn paper thin
So much so that if you blow on me, I’ll crumble from within.

My heart thumps in my chest like a rabbit
Trying desperately to run away
From the predator known as anxiety
that prevents me From falling asleep
as I so desperately need.
There is no reason for me to feel this way. To feel as if I am a rotting fruit on a tree that was supposed to be green and flourishing.
I know I am moving forward
I know I am doing better
But why do I feel like I'm drowning, even when I know how to swim?