"unlovable" poems
Small and insignificant...
Inferior.
Insecure and shameful...
Clumsy.
Weak and sad...
Molested.
Unremarkable and transparent...
Mundane.
Unlovable and ugly...
Hated.
Remedial and simple...
Stupid.
Angry and jealous...
Loathsome.
Lovesick and lonely...
Desperate.
Sick and Tired...
Old.
Unstable and self-destructive...
Insane.
Vulnerable and trusting...
Suicidal.
Hopes and dreams...
Deteriorating.
Smiling and Laughter...
Remedy.
Heidi Shavill
2008
Jan 21, 2013
Jan 21, 2013 at 3:59 AM UTC
I want to take the bits of you I love
and press them like flowers
between the pages of my favourite book
because I know these will never fade.
And I want to take all the scraps
that you dislike about yourself
and display them on my refrigerator
to show you I'm still proud
of the person you are
and of the person you are becoming.
But most of all, I want to spin you like a globe
and drag my fingers accross until it stops
to discover the pieces of you
that you've yet to reveal to anyone else.
I want to wrap them up in linen
and place them in an old cigar box,
I'd tuck it away safely
in the top drawer of my bedside table,
so you know I will never let
those pieces of you go
Because when you share
hidden parts of yourself
with someone else,
you're trusting that person
to hold the secret sections
of your heart,
and to love the bits you thought were unlovable.
May 25, 2013
May 25, 2013 at 11:59 AM UTC
Yeah I totally love being single!
You can do what you want whenever you want without obligations or having to think about anyone else you can flirt shamelessly with as many guys as you like, there is no pressure to look good for anyone I love that I have all this me time where I can spend a Saturday night reading and listening to the music I like without trying to decode mixed signals in text messages
I never have to depend on anyone but myself.
No one is stressing me out by depending on me.
I can sit by myself on the couch home alone when everyone else is out
And feel completely isolated, unloved and unlovable
I can feel so ugly and obsess over it
I can scroll through pictures of pretty celebrities and models and girls I know online bitterly wishing I looked like them and could be like them so that maybe someone would notice me and give me a chance
I can scream at the radio for playing stupid love songs
I can eat ice cream and chocolate wondering why I am such a waste of space
Thinking of all the guys who have rejected me and dropped me over the years
Have no one to love
Or who loves me
No guy I can trust with my secrets and loyalty
No one who needs me
No one to want
Or make me feel wanted
To spend nights together
Just talking
And watching movies
Being cutesy and flirty with
Lie hand in hand with
No one I can gush about to my friends
No one I can bake for
No one I can buy stuff for, just 'cause
No one I can do random couples stuff with
No one in my life
It's pretty great.
I love being single.
Nov 25, 2014
Nov 25, 2014 at 10:27 PM UTC
i want to take the bits of you i love
and press them like flowers
between the pages of my favorite book
and i want to take all the scraps
that you dislike in yourself
and display them on my refrigerator
to show you i’m still proud
of the person you are
and the person you are becoming
but most of all, i want to spin you like a globe
and drag my finger across till it stops
to discover the pieces of you
that you’ve yet to reveal to anyone else
i want to wrap them up in linen
and place them in an old cigar box,
i’d tuck it away safely
in the top drawer of my bedside table,
so you know i’ll never let
those pieces of you go
because when you share
hidden parts of yourself
with someone else,
you’re trusting that person
to hold the secret sections
of your heart
and to love the bits
you thought
were unlovable
May 10, 2013
May 10, 2013 at 11:37 AM UTC
We were promised
Glitz and glam
Love and security
Never the beating down
Of our own
Never the feeling
Of an unlovable soul
Waterfalls into the night
We all know something ain't right
The nonsensical millennial
Smokes into the night
The harder we work
The harder we fall to our dying depths
And you wonder why
We haven't slept yet
We were promised
And now we are ****** off
Nov 25, 2014
Nov 25, 2014 at 12:01 AM UTC
One ***** cocktail and
Two games of pool
Taking treasured walks
our hands entwined
Sharing our precious time
Stealing glances in your sapphire eyes
You stared into my fire
Plant your protection onto me
Waiting for our souls to entwine
Our bodies fill with adoration
For we deserve and desire
To always remember
We are destined to be
A night we spent you and me
On a crescent moon
Forever, and for eternity
Sep 5, 2022
Sep 5, 2022 at 10:12 AM UTC
you say you love me
but do you ever stop to look
how you love me
how do you do
if that’s how to
declare me unlovable
for I rather be unloved
than loved by you
May 4, 2015
May 4, 2015 at 4:10 AM UTC
you always complained
that you were a dandelion
in a garden of roses,
a pest, a **** --
something unlovable.
and maybe you weren't perfect.
maybe you were a bit
rough around the edges
with a crack
here or there.
maybe your seams had come undone
and, if you still insist on being a flower,
maybe you had lost a petal or two.
but what you failed to realize
is that every rose
has thorns.
so maybe they didn't have
as many cracks as you,
as many tears as you,
as many rough edges
as you did,
but god,
they were nowhere near as pure,
nowhere near as lovely
as you were.
we wish on dandelions, dear,
because we trust them.
nobody's ever wished
on a rose,
now have they?
no.
they're too afraid
they'll get pricked,
stabbed,
betrayed.
so maybe you were
the dandelion
hidden in a garden of roses.
maybe you were the outcast,
the misfit,
the odd one out.
maybe you were just a little bit unloved,
and unfairly forgotten.
but what you failed to realize
is that i would have gladly picked you
over the brightest rose
in that silly little garden.
(a.m.)
Oct 12, 2014
Oct 12, 2014 at 5:03 PM UTC
You are difficult to love. Not only because I am not good at loving but also because you are quite unlovable.
Mar 7, 2016
Mar 7, 2016 at 12:24 PM UTC
In a far away forest there was a bear who felt very blue.
She simply could not snap out of it, and didn’t know what to do.
There was no reason for this sadness, her life was going well,
But at random times in every day, tears would start to swell
This feeling kind of scared her, but even more than that,
It made her feel embarrassed, like some sort of selfish brat
I don’t know why I’m like this, she constantly thought to herself.
I have no reason to feel this way, I have my legs, my sight, my health
There are bears in other places who have lost their homes to fires,
And baby bears in situations that are absolutely dire.
But these thoughts did not allieviate her internal pain,
In fact they only made it worse, topping sadness off with shame.
While she wanted to go talk to someone, to find out what was wrong
She settled for self-medicating, taking hits off of a ****
This helped her out a little bit, at least for a short while
But it was not a real fix, to say so was denial
So this went on for months and months, getting progressively worse,
And the bear learned to carry the weight of it, bending to this curse
She became her toughest critic, her own worst enemy
An ugly, unlovable idiot is what she thought herself to be.
I can’t tell you what happened to her, I simply do not know
Maybe she’s still out there somewhere, just putting on a show.
Nov 1, 2012
Nov 1, 2012 at 12:21 PM UTC
if I say i'm
unlovable
don't say to me
"But I love you,
isn't that enough?"
because honestly it's not
I say i'm unlovable
because I can't even
love myself
so how can others?
Oct 14, 2013
Oct 14, 2013 at 12:58 PM UTC
well
there's plenty of cutesy names to
call one's children
but his was 'unlovable trash'
He remembered it from the time he was in the crib
They held him there
for longer than most parents
held their kids in cribs. Though only dad
called him so
because he constantly claimed he wasn't his
unlovable trash
he had the wrong skin tone
was too pale
with curly orange hair
and freckles
but mom always pretended she didn't
hear
the words
unlovable trash
she would act as if they were never uttered
and growing up
he thought
unlovable trash was a good thing
thought it was how you show love to your loved
ones
"Mom, you’re unlovable trash."
she was so happy to hear it
she burst into tears and went into the
kitchen and uncorked a bottle of wine
and drank it all by herself. What an
unlovable trash she was
Unfortunately
by the time he could pronounce the lovely
words
father was no longer in his life
but father too
was an unlovable trash
Oct 26, 2019
Oct 26, 2019 at 9:58 AM UTC
lavender, lilac, and strawberry
I taste energy like yours rarely
make my cheeks redder than cherry
you have an essence, it is a blessing
you taught me lessons, such a blessing
I thought I was unlovable you showed me the contrary
make me sing like the giddy canary
was too used to solitary
read my feelings like a library
Apr 10, 2022
Apr 10, 2022 at 10:52 AM UTC
People ask me why I cut
People say "Why would you do that?"
I'm too young to be this sad
People don't understand
I cut for me, I cut for pain
Emotional pain makes me sick
It is unbearable and all-consuming
Emotional pain in which I wallow
Physical pain is easier
Physical pain is short term
It allows me to Focus
Focus on the thin red line
The drops of blood pooling
I don't have to think at all
Nothing comes into my brain
Nothing but pain signals
No remembrance of ****
Abandonment and abuse
Cutting is my escape, my salvation
I am full of so many demons
When I cut I bleed them out
Each drop of red is a tear I've cried
Many tears and many red droplets
Physical pain overcomes me
Wraps me up in a ****** up blanket
Cutting is my drug, my escape
I am given the chance to numb
The ache in my heart is released
Through the valleys in my arm
Valleys carved into my flesh
Released through the blood
Pooling on the bathroom floor
A puddle of pain and demons
This is a puddle of me, all the
***** nasty, unlovable, ********
Then there is a moment of bliss
That moment when I numb
Like right before they put you to sleep
The numb feeling of emptiness
I don't think about the demons
The demons in my head, screaming
They are no longer in my brain
They are in the puddle on the floor
No longer inside of me
Gone for a moment but not forever
Pain always comes back
This is why I cut, to quiet the pain
Oct 30, 2012
Oct 30, 2012 at 1:23 AM UTC
You know what?
I genuinely believe that I am unlovable.
Not even in the self-pitying way, I just have thought about it and I really think that no one could ever truly love me.
I have too many flaws that get in the way.
If I am imperfect then I can't be perfect enough for them
If I am perfect then I am not the quirky beautifully rare girl they want
I am too violent and weird
I am too hateful and grudging
And the worst part is
I don't even WANT to stop being violent and weird or hateful or grudging
I wish someone would love me for it
because I love those who are deadly loyal, absurd, not afraid of a little violence (not abusive, just to be clear. I do not support that) those who hate things because the more passionately they hate, the more passionately they love as well. And someone who holds a grudge actually cares about things. I would love a boy who was all those things but no guy wants a girl who can't let go of things and spends all her time muttering to herself about how worthless and ugly she is because that has become my hobby I don't even realize I am doing it sometimes.
I just don't think anyone could ever really truly fall in love with me.
That makes me kind of sad I guess... :(
Nov 18, 2014
Nov 18, 2014 at 1:03 AM UTC
~¤~ω~¤⊙¤~ω¤~
My father told me
this is Love
how two people show
tender feelings for
one another
My father held me
so very close
I had always wanted
To be his Special Girl
Number One in our
cloistered world
My father used his charm
to keep me in his arms
till he was done with me.
Then I became
Uncomfortable
Inconsolable
Unreachable
Unlovable
I beseech abusers everywhere
Please let the children be.
~¤~ω~¤¥⊙¥⊙¥¤~ω¤~
~Moonflower~Fluer de Luna~April 2015~
Apr 10, 2015
Apr 10, 2015 at 5:33 PM UTC
~~○♢○~~
there was once
a girl unnamed
ever doubted
ever shamed
untamed fire
high & wild
she was a haunted
white-hot child
a wayward waif
she had no guide
no way to hold
her rage inside
*"you're a ***** little girl,
watch me as I wreck your world!"
bursting brain
as well as bubble
he brought her
a world of trouble
now unloved
unlovable*
charcoal lily
ragged ****
neglected garden
a bad seed
never knowing
her great need
a prickly thistle
tried to hide
all the pain
she held inside
chorus
for years she went on
in this state
unloved, unwise
and reprobate
no turning back
it was too late
wild parties
dating thugs
drinking *****
doing drugs
chorus
But deep inside
the little-girl-lost
a seed of faith
grew at last
she grabbed a hold
and held on fast
then, when things
were at their worst
she began
to hunger ~ thirst!
because her God
had loved
*her first!
"I've loved you, child.
I had a plan
long before the world began.
Please do not be sad or blue,
this destiny included YOU
you are SO important
to My story
you will bring Me such great
GLORY!
here below
in heav'n above
I'll show you how much
♡♡ YOU ARE LOVED ♡♡*
the woman changed
she was set free
who's the woman?
she is
ME
SøułSurvivør
(C) 8/16/2017
Aug 16, 2017
Aug 16, 2017 at 6:10 AM UTC
People ask me why I cut
People say "Why would you do that?"
I'm too young to be this sad
People don't understand
I cut for me, I cut for pain
Emotional pain makes me sick
It is unbearable and all-consuming
Emotional pain in which I wallow
Physical pain is easier
Physical pain is short term
It allows me to Focus
Focus on the thin red line
The drops of blood pooling
I don't have to think at all
Nothing comes into my brain
Nothing but pain signals
No remembrance of ****
Abandonment and abuse
Cutting is my escape, my salvation
I am full of so many demons
When I cut I bleed them out
Each drop of red is a tear I've cried
Many tears and many red droplets
Physical pain overcomes me
Wraps me up in a ****** up blanket
Cutting is my drug, my escape
I am given the chance to numb
The ache in my heart is released
Through the valleys in my arm
Valleys carved into my flesh
Released through the blood
Pooling on the bathroom floor
A puddle of pain and demons
This is a puddle of me, all the
***** nasty, unlovable, ********
Then there is a moment of bliss
That moment when I numb
Like right before they put you to sleep
The numb feeling of emptiness
I don't think about the demons
The demons in my head, screaming
They are no longer in my brain
They are in the puddle on the floor
No longer inside of me
Gone for a moment but not forever
Pain always comes back
This is why I cut, to quiet the pain
Oct 30, 2012
Oct 30, 2012 at 1:23 AM UTC
Who gives a ****
If I live or die?
I have become the one forgotten
And I have fallen into some peculiar space
Now no one remembers the girl who once stood
In my place
She is changed, she has become something unexpected and unforgiving.
Is there a reason to believe in myself anymore?
I have been deemed, by many,
Unlovable.
Perhaps the worst damnation of all
Has come from my inner self.
But how does the rest of the world see me?
My views have been clouded over the years
By some unwarranted opinions
Of hypocrites and bigots
Bullies and ex-boyfriends
Daddy.
Calling me names to this day
Even after some bouts of depression
Cutting
Eating disorders
Even a suicide attempt.
Although these are all in the past
I still fail to hold myself in high regard.
Did they make me hate myself?
No, but they had a weighted hand in its development.
So who could love a creature like me?
A person, or rather, a shell of one,
Plagued by habit
Submerged in guilt
Crippled by a question that has never ceased.
Does being forced into a protective armor,
Being ridiculed
Being unloved
Make someone truly
Unlovable?
Jan 31, 2014
Jan 31, 2014 at 10:59 PM UTC
You don't make me happy. You are my happiness. The difference between the two is simple, but important: You see, if you only made me happy, just the thought of you would be enough. A picture of you would suffice to keep me content. But it isn't. You are my happiness, embodied. So when you're away, my happiness is gone as well. Thoughts are not enough. I don't feel complete when I'm not with you. I need you. All of you. I can only hope that you need me, too.
I always thought of love like puzzle pieces. I know that metaphor's been done a hundred times over, but this is a little more specific. You see, everyone is built in a certain way. We are all pieces. Some people are whole pieces unto themselves - an entire picture, clear and beautiful. They don't need another puzzle piece. They're complete as they are, which is fine. Most people, however, are parts of a whole. They need other pieces to help them make sense, to see the whole picture. Some people have a lot of spaces and gaps, and it takes a lot of other puzzle pieces working together to keep them happy and to make them feel whole. Most people are halves. They are half of a picture, searching for the other half of themselves. However, these are puzzle pieces, meaning not every piece will fit with another. The pieces have to be the right size, the right shape, the right color. Puzzle pieces are complex and dynamic. Each one is special. Even if a piece is shaped really weird or has odd edges and angles, it fits perfectly with another piece somewhere. They just have to find each other. No one is wrong, and no one is unlovable. They just have to find the piece that complements them.
Somewhere, there is another puzzle piece out there that will help you make sense of yourself and see the whole picture of who you are. I always liked to think of it like that. I like to think that someday, someone as unique as I am will help me create a beautiful picture, a whole picture of myself, that we can both understand and be happy with. And I will do the same for them. Just like a puzzle.
Dec 17, 2012
Dec 17, 2012 at 3:15 AM UTC
Unloved I live an
Unlovely life, treated
Unloving by people I'm
Unable to love
Unlovable I am treating people
Unlovingly myself
Unlovable in the literal sense:
the impossibility of being loved
Nov 6, 2014
Nov 6, 2014 at 8:55 AM UTC
Swollen eyes
Tear stained cheeks
A dusty mirror
And a beating heart
Pinching my thighs and muffin top
Fat
Ugly
Unlovable
These words haunting me
Wishing
Wishing to unzip this skin
And emerge as thin
Beautiful
Lovable
My head feels dizzy
Hearts starts to race
Warm tears streaming down my face
Smash
The mirror is in pieces
Hands are bleeding
Heart still beating
A reflection
That cannot be fixed
Aug 21, 2015
Aug 21, 2015 at 7:00 PM UTC
I never cared for
Broken things
They seemed so pointless
Useless
Unlovable
I never saw any worth
Because what good is a guitar
Without any strings?
I never saw any worth in myself
Because I hated broken things
I believed the idea of no hope
That I couldn't change anything
But your hand in my life
Has helped me to see
That maybe, sometimes
It's worth fixing.
{NR}
Sep 17, 2014
Sep 17, 2014 at 9:01 AM UTC
Such greatness
With such grace
Bestowing
Worthiness on the Unworthy.
Gifting the
Ungifted.
Loving the
Unlovable.
Welcoming the
Unwelcome.
Turning the cheek
I have slapped too many times,
And responding
With a kiss.
I cry.
I wail for His forgiveness
And at the vision of myself
Strutting,
Cocky,
Totally inept
And inconceivably wrong.
And yet,
Grace.
Apr 16, 2013
Apr 16, 2013 at 10:30 PM UTC
How do you live with yourself?
When your mind has been twisted,
With so many anxieties?
You plan out every step ahead of time
Way ahead of time
You choose your actions carefully
Because one wrong move and you're dead
You don't make eye contact
People will see your pain, these eyes reveal everything
You walk faster
So no one can stare at you for very long
You don't speak up for yourself
There is nothing worth speaking for
You put a stupid smile on your face
Get through the day, you can cry your eyes out later
Every single step
Every single breath
Makes you wonder
Why you're here
And why it's happening to you
Every scar
Every tear
Reminds you that
You're broken
Useless
And unlovable
Feb 9, 2014
Feb 9, 2014 at 11:31 PM UTC