"painkiller" poems
2018
Does it necessarily called sad even when there's no tears?
Does it necessarily called scar even when there's no mark?
Does it necessarily called pain, even when it doesn't show?
Heart.
Break.
Heartbreak.
I am used to hearing this word on a daily basis.
Maybe a little too often, but my point here is, everyone knows someone 'utters' that they are in a heartbreak once in a while.
So, what is heartbreak to you?
"When someone can't keep their promises while they have the chance to." —Alessandra A.
"Uncertainty." —Samuel Wijaya
"Friends who leave." —Vivian Loo
"Being a disappointment." —Ryon Regasa
"When the butterflies are no longer there." —Calvina Izumi
"Seeing him smile, but I'm not the reason." —Anonymous
"When someone you love, has another name in his/her heart." —Evadne Richard
"When an effort to love can't be seen anymore because it is sealed shut by a mistake." —David Halim
"When you finally meet someone you love sincerely and somehow they start distancing themselves, and you don't even talk to them anymore and you don't even know why."—Natasha
These are some opinions from my friends that probably represent some/most of your thoughts about a heartbreak, at least describe what comes first to your mind after hearing that word.
And those opinions also described mine, and mostly represent some of the heartbreak(s) that had occured in my life.
Now,
concluding all the opinions above
How would I myself define what heartbreak is?
I would define it as an invisible yet irresistible pain.
Headache is a type of pain.
And heartbreak is also a type of pain.
But we all know that both of them are completely different.
When you're having a headache, you know exactly where it hurts.
But when you're having a heartbreak, it just hurts.
You don't know exactly where the pain came from,
even when some referred to their chest ('cause it's where their heart is) or anywhere else, it's actually just the side effect of having a heartbreak itself.
Just enough explanation to state that heartbreak is like a nowhere and everywhere type of pain.
You can't see and you can't know where it hurts, but it's real. As if it was invisible as it is uncertain.
Just because you can't really point out where it hurts, doesn't mean it's not there.
And another thing about heartbreak is, you can't resist it. No matter how hard you try.
There is no painkiller for your heartbreak, and even if you use something as a pain killer (such as alcohol?), it doesn't necessarily works as one.
It doesn't make the pain go away, it just distracts you from what you're feeling, temporarily.
It shifts your attention and feelings into something less noteworthy for a moment, and then the next day the pain is still going to be there.
You can try to resist it, but only time that can make all of that fades.
And even when it fades, it doesn't go away.
It never will.
Jun 21, 2020
Jun 21, 2020 at 9:11 AM UTC
I am not feeling well does not just mean the temperature you see on that thermometer,
it also means my body and it's burning desire to no longer be alive
I am not feeling well does not just mean my head feels heavy and I want to sleep,
it also means my heart is sinking to my feet and i physically feel it in my veins
I am not feeling well does not just mean I need a painkiller to take away the pain,
it also means i am dying to reach for the blade and tear my skin apart to feel something
I am not feeling well does not just mean the food I ate is making me feel like throwing up,
it also means my entire existence makes me sick to the point of death
I am not feeling well does not just mean I will feel better after I take this nap,
it also means i will take nap after nap after nap after nap hoping to feel alive again
I am not feeling well does not just mean my joints hurt and I need to slow down
it also means my body is tired of fighting a losing battle and i give up
because some days,
i wear my depression and
some days,
my depression wears me
Feb 24, 2016
Feb 24, 2016 at 5:06 AM UTC
Here I am, leg in plaster
Nurse with a needle, after me
Forgot the brake, can't go faster
Now all I get is woe and misery
CHORUS
I got those wheelchair blues
Suffering those wheelchair blues
Hear my wheelchair blues
I'm singing those wheelchair blues
Rushing to get that elevator again
Going quick and my hands are sore
I'm just too slow, because then
I end up crashing into the closed door
CHORUS
I got those wheelchair blues
Suffering those wheelchair blues
Hear my wheelchair blues
I'm singing those wheelchair blues
Showing off and think I'm clever
Should have taken my painkiller pill
You won't stop and wish I never
My fault for trying to go down hill
CHORUS
I got those wheelchair blues
Suffering those wheelchair blues
Hear my wheelchair blues
I'm singing those wheelchair blues
At last I can get out of the chair
But things will never be the same
Because now it just ain't fair
They've given me a Zimmer Frame
CHORUS
I got those wheelchair blues
Suffering those wheelchair blues
Hear my wheelchair blues
I'm singing those wheelchair blues
I got those wheelchair blues
Suffering those wheelchair blues
Hear my wheelchair blues
I'm singing those wheelchair blues
copyright Chris Smith
Nov 8, 2009
Nov 8, 2009 at 12:16 AM UTC
Your music is sensual, dark and languid
Mysterious and **** hypnotic and sultry
The slow tempo and rumbling bass drums are a heavenly mix
I close my eyes and let the forlorn echoes immerse me
In a sea of falsetto vocals and stuttering percussions
Your music is enigmatic, puzzling and seductive
Pacifying and troubling, calming and cinematic
Your champagne crooning is a movie in itself
Telling me the tales of a gloomy sex-infused hangover life
And it connects to the depths of my soul
Even though I've never experienced it
Narcotized slow jams filled with samples of punk and rock
Transports me to an actual dream world
Your subtly crafted harmonies and beats are celestial
And your lyrics a painkiller
That numbs the wounds in my soul and takes me higher...
Your voice is R&B; but your lyrics are ***** rap
You take such vile words and turn them into something beautiful
and I adore that.
Feb 24, 2014
Feb 24, 2014 at 4:02 PM UTC
The same song looping over and over…
The same suicidal thoughts torturing my sanity…
Repeats accruing on infinite piles of ruble,
Vigorously fighting these thoughts,
These demons of mentality,
A constant cartwheel of emotion…
Always racing…
Not ceasing for a mere second…
Forcing the pill in my mouth,
And then another,
And another…
The only mental painkiller is death…
I feel numb,
Darkness seeps into my vision…
Blurring reality…
The Pain is going away…
I feel alive as I feel myself die…
Emergency Medical Squads break the door down…
I sit there,
Watching them cycle electricity into my body as I blindly stare,
Eyes not moving,
Weak,
You never came.
I want to tell you I love you until it becomes white noise…
Always knowing I love you,
Never doubting yourself again…
I want to make love until we are one…
My body and yours…
Sharing the night, and day…
Filling senses with pleasure and love…
I want to hold you until you are weightless…
A feather in my arms…
Carry you up to a safe place on a dark night…
I want to love you forever…
I want to love you till stone itself evaporates into the air as it boils underneath the red giant sun…
I want to love you when the Universe rebirths or collapses…
I want to love you when the bell tolls,
The bell does not mark the end,
It will never end,
I will love you always,
Forever,
Not stopping even for a supernova…
No matter how lovely, how vivid, how colorful the painting…
Toxic fumes are given off,
The closer you look the more cracks and flaws you’ll find…
No matter how soft the wood, how elaborate the carving,
You can’t even begin to feel all the splinters…
All the cuts,
The closer you get the deeper the grooves…
This rusty drain has grown clogged of emotion and dust…
Wonderful you say…
But that is just for now,
Today.
My past is dark, dead, rotten,
Who knows if the future will be any different.
Today I have a moment of peace,
You,
A bright blue gem shining in the darkness,
So pure it becomes it’s own light-source,
Echoing beauty throughout the blackness,
Illuminating me,
True Commitment,
Warm and sweet Love,
Unquestionable Trust,
Seraphic Beauty,
Everything I need…
I sit here questioning these words…
Thinking of the purest way to put them,
But emotion is not pure,
It’s ***** rough, and raged,
But when I talk to you that emotion turns into something different,
It turns into satisfying warmth that runs through my body…
The past evaporates into the air,
Dispersing and losing its importance,
You are my future,
Not the past.
Dec 29, 2011
Dec 29, 2011 at 2:03 PM UTC
***What if I say, I am not like the others?
Are you afraid of seeing my bloodshot eyes?
It ain’t a delusion of your vision
It ain’t a theory of your hostile mind
Its just an authority to reveal high
As you ****** up in the midnight.
What if I declare, I like to be a pothead?
It ain’t a crime of your filthy society
It ain’t a ****** of your hypersexual beauty
Its just a power to absorb black hole
As you get dissolved in the infinity.
What if we believe, we are united peace?
Our intoxication could never be slayer as your humanity diminishes
Our immune could never be a flame as your democracy fire burns
Our dealing could never be an acrid as your judgments villainous
Our indignation could never be a pretender as your sensibility veiled
Our lonesome shadow could never be a congress of love as your realization mortifies
And our congregation of morality must have been psychedelic painkiller.
What if we deny, we are insignificant existence?
So, who are you crippling our bloodshot eyes, A Social featherbrain?
Who are you to stop having "dopetherone" in the town, A godly crusader?
Who are you to proclaim the rule against your mind, A phrenetic lawyer?
What if we deny, we are insignificant existence?
What if we believe, we are united peace?
We will keep walking with our head held high.***
April' 2015
Mar 25, 2017
Mar 25, 2017 at 2:07 PM UTC
every sad thought the girl contained,
she took it out on herself
trying to find some "painkiller"
she turned to self harm
and never looked back
l.c.b.
Mar 12, 2014
Mar 12, 2014 at 1:13 AM UTC
There’s that point
Approaching ******
Reaching it
Savoring it....
Where I’m absolutely certain
I’d do anything for some real ***
Or maybe even
Just to ****** one more time...
I suppose I’ve been in need
Of some kind of painkiller
And it’s clear now
That natural ones may have to do
Dec 20, 2019
Dec 20, 2019 at 1:16 AM UTC
Aural sounds of delectation
funk-fuel in fervent distillation
undertones of jazz-swing in migration
electronic clicks and blips for relaxation
ambience is my one true occupation.
The resonance of sound in rotation
the initiation itself a radiation
morphological alternation in isolation
as the hubbub of voices echo respiration
breath in, breath out, in elevation.
No underlying obligation, only inspiration
and celebration of collaboration
revel in the pleasures of sensation
like the first discovery of amplification
and in its appreciation and stimulation
embrace variation in all its illumination.
Seek out new music from recommendation
the gravitation towards transformation
the re-education and regeneration
this musical manifestation of civilisation
saturated in complex contemplation
adoration in meditation
the simplest form of gratification
the creative urge for diversification
and technological intensity
of electronic experimentation.
Jul 23, 2014
Jul 23, 2014 at 7:26 AM UTC
In your past, this past
they weren't valued
no one said they were members of the family
what walks on four legs and is furry and cute is only
to last as long as nature intended and then to be disposed of
Veal calves in crates, taken from mothers on the day of their birth
to make more milk for humans, horse slaughter for glue
and foi gras, ducks and geese locked in a vice grip of their cages
metal tubes rammed down their throats and force fed until a liver disease
develops, painful, but given no respite
and served as a delicacy and
fur coats from animals skinned alive right here in America
still when mink farms are outlawed in the Netherlands and
two million dogs and cats skinned in China every year not to mention
other horrors and no one cared or looked their way because they are
only animals, and voiceless and helpless and no one cared to give them
a voice or advocacy
"that's why they're there, for our use, people still say" who profit from an industry
of suffering
And today, there are people who try to give them a voice and there are veterinarians who will try to help you with your member of the family, as he suffers, in his old age
a bag of fluids hangs from my exercise bike, and intermixed with my medications
is the painkiller and anti-nausea pills for my dear old friend
whose pancreas is failing
and father, this is foreign to you
you pretend it is a crime
silence is the only thing connecting us now
I hope you enjoyed your last barrage of unkind words
I think you did. The saddest thing I've learned about people like you
is
you feel better after such an attack, to see me reeling, bleeding on the ground
and you feel better, calmer and purged.
A kind of misbegotten peace settles over you
an exploitive peace from another's tears and pain
And yes, father, there were no agencies to give a voice to children
when you were young
no CPS, to aid my nine year old ***** friend
as a code of silence enveloped her attacker
to protect him, the one who destroyed her
But today there is a small brigade of a modern kind of love
to give a voice, protection, soothing to the ones who can
only suffer at our hands and not protect themselves from
our wrath and exploitation
and it is a better world for that, father
for my furry pancreatic friend and for any other
nine year old **** victims here
Mar 24, 2013
Mar 24, 2013 at 12:38 PM UTC
What is sadness for the mind of madness
It might be odd to bear witness, but the mighty warrior who welds words like weapons
With shield of indifference, will no yield under falling havens
What hurts is that small tinker of needle
Plucked from the rose we touched in haste
What is sadness for the mind of madness
It's saying take care instead of I love you
It's saying goodnight instead of I miss you
It's saying bye instead of stay
But no, we'll not say… will not plead
For the painkiller needs to be kept on the shelf
Not be taken as a meal
A toxic relief, Not something that they need to keep, note to self stitched in skin : keep away
What's happiness to the mind of madness
It's fear nothing else
Oct 24, 2018
Oct 24, 2018 at 11:30 PM UTC
Let me laugh,
Let me laugh when I want to,
Let me laugh to forget you,
Let me laugh.
Ha ha ha,
Yes, I am happy,
Let me genuinely laugh,
Let me laugh without thinking.
Love,
Make me smile,
Make me want to feel it,
But I can only laugh,
So, please let me laugh.
Indeed, laugh is my painkiller,
Laugh is my medicine when in the crowd,
Laugh is my friend when I feel alone,
Laugh is my sun to my darkness,
Please let me laugh.
Dec 5, 2019
Dec 5, 2019 at 9:13 AM UTC
Painkiller by Judas Priest (Glenn Tipton)
and later covered by Death (Chuck Schuldiner)
-
Faster than a bullet
Terrifying scream
Enraged and full of anger,
he's half man and half machine.
Rides the metal monster,
breathing smoke and fire,
closing in with vengeance soaring high
He is the Painkiller!
This is the Painkiller!
Planets devastated,
mankind's on it's knees.
A savior comes from out the skies
in answer to their pleas.
Through boiling clouds of thunder,
blasting bolts of steel,
evil's going under,
deadly wheels!
He is the Painkiller
This is the Painkiller
Faster than a laser bullet,
louder than an atom bomb,
chromium plated boiling metal,
brighter than a thousand stars!
Flying high on rapture
Stronger free and brave,
nevermore encaptured.
They've been brought back from the grave
With mankind ressurrected,
forever to survive,
returns from Armageddon to the skies!
He is the Painkiller
This is the Painkiller
Wings of steel Painkiller
Deadly wheels Painkiller
Oct 19, 2013
Oct 19, 2013 at 5:12 PM UTC
life is rampant,
and when suppressed,
it can blossom into
a violent flow of emotions
that are stronger
than any painkiller
a doctor can prescribe.
Feb 25, 2015
Feb 25, 2015 at 5:48 PM UTC
gnaw red your bone
in the aliform of dream
this
allocation of my
guts spreads lips
onto stained paint buckets
I
never meant for
us to be beautiful
adding
music
to every line
that came out
your mouth—
a moth-springing
butterfly
its
wings no longer
dusted but
dried and wasteful.
it was the
paradox of doubt
and
I cried through
painkiller night
Jan 23, 2018
Jan 23, 2018 at 11:43 AM UTC
You were a drug to me, babe.
You weren't the medicinal kind either.
You weren't just a painkiller.
You weren't an antidepressant.
You weren't a Xanax.
You weren't ******
You weren't even the good kind of drug.
You weren't ****** or **** or ecstasy.
You were the kind of drug that
messed around with my heart and left my brain feeling clouded.
You were the kind of drug that left me confused and
feeling worse than before I took you.
But I did.
Again and
again.
I told myself I would
break this vicious cycle of unscrewing your cap and
hating myself for it afterwards.
That I wouldn't draw back the plunger and
force you into my veins anymore.
But I didn't.
Again and
again.
I told myself you
would be the death of me.
Every high you gave me left me feeling
lost in the clouds.
I might as well have been
six feet deep.
Feb 23, 2021
Feb 23, 2021 at 11:14 PM UTC
We fight the fight for the hopeless romantic
Love is a battlefield
You never know when its going to hit you in the face
Love is a painkiller
You want the truth
I believe that there is someone out there for everyone
But once you got them
Dont let them go
You'll regret it
Then you walk alone in the world
Walk alone intoxicated with regret
I stare at the foot prints of my life
I think i lost my true love
Love is Pain
Pain if love
Sep 18, 2012
Sep 18, 2012 at 11:17 PM UTC
How do you perceive the world
A world as dark and happy,
Suppressive and full of opportunity,
As another headache or painkiller,
Or as much of a heartbreak
Or heart-filler?
Where does one draw the line
In the figurative dirt of
Trust or mistrust,
Of isolation and lust?
How have you been conditioned to view this world?
Through two windows to a compact machine
Cogs and gears turning, calculating...
What am I seeing?
Oct 27, 2016
Oct 27, 2016 at 10:11 PM UTC
Freedom is the urge
That breaks out inside of us that makes us want to run.
An unseen Parkour of hands and feet.
Covering the threshold of walls and windows.
An key to an apartment
Of untold potential.
Seen as a window,
A causal gaze.
Things once seen as 3-D now seen 2-D.
Coming to the realization of just who we really are.
The desire of choosing to see things as brand new
A stillness of sorts.
A new brand of simple.
Holding on to a rail debating on whether or not to jump or hold on for a moment longer.
I.
The infinite compliment of the heart.
Choosing instead to run escaping,
The unfortunate pleasure of being chained in schizophrenia.
Gorillaz beating an untamed drum.
A constant pound, hands and feet becoming the ultimate form of expression.
The scuffle of feet over the sound of concrete.
Lost somewhere in the city.
Gorillaz beating an untamed drum.
Holy **** my thumbs are up.
Unpaused ****** expressions, Revealing perhaps way too much.
A cup of cold noodles quietly waiting wholeheartedly.
Next to the gorillaz loudly stating otherwise.
Them.
The painkiller to an over twisted wrist,
Procrastination is a *****
Oct 18, 2016
Oct 18, 2016 at 9:31 PM UTC
Swallowing pills
again
&
again
Trying my best to get high again on the feeling, drugging myself up to remember the feeling of your lips, your warm touch, and inhale your deodorant, that succulent scent.
I want to be sleepless, and think in the night. And be happy, or sad, either one works
But I guess I just want to remember I’m alive
Happy,
Sad,
Nostalgia that drains me, happy memories turning into sour nightly thoughts.
I think of the dark night sky, and I thought there was once stars in your eyes, yes, maybe.
You made me higher than I’d ever been, and I miss you my dear dear happy pill
Oct 12, 2018
Oct 12, 2018 at 3:53 AM UTC
Skin crawling silence, everytime we'd draw close.
.
she always knew how much she could wound me, what a devilish threat she posed.
.
we knew no language, but the one our eyes discovered every second, hour or day.
.
how she would jaunt her way through me and take away the words I'd try to say.
.
her eyes. oh, they taunted all that I ever had faith in, all that I ever believed.
.
I discovered devotion in them, there was nothing more I'd wanted to achieve.
.
and yet she must never know all that I want for her. all that I want us to be.
cause, the rejection would be something no painkiller would ever heal..
- Aks, HeArt.
Apr 21, 2015
Apr 21, 2015 at 12:06 PM UTC
Chains of heart strings locked away by fake queens
Time behind a cell wall
I wonder why love is a crime
Punishment from something that my heart commits
But my brain a bystander to an attack on beauty
Witness to pain from someone meant to be a painkiller
Your lying lips sounding like old movie scripts
Bounding me to the cold corners of this mental cage
Prison tattoos consisting of scarred arms
Associates in romance and nothing more
Holding hands just a misdemeanor
You’re leaving me on parole.
Mar 4, 2015
Mar 4, 2015 at 4:01 PM UTC
Ever untouched by prying eyes
Your incandescence knows no price
No quantity of gold could wager
Your glimmering translucency
For beauty sits through frosted glass
It knows no mirror image
In sunny spells it lights the way
Just possible to distinguish
At night it sits upon the lake
Which ruminates inside your head
To change you but remain unchanged
To glow when couples wed
You are the anthropomorphism
Of waves on a summers day
You are the moment two opposing
Paths conjoin in harmony
In the instance your cover’s blown
Your reflection sits untampered
For that instant your delicate soul
Lies naked, conserved, unhampered
For all of this I sit in awe
As viscous silver streams
Carve channels at your feet
Ejecting precious molten metals
Which ignite with scorching heat
I find the strength to sit up
Then rise up onto my knees
Put out your hand and pull me up
I feel so deeply of your beauty
I cannot help but smile
When I think of your gift to me
It strikes me that time has passed
Since the sun shone to illuminate
Just how grateful I am to have an
Opposing path through frosted glass
A flower to my unkempt leaves.
Jul 28, 2015
Jul 28, 2015 at 9:00 AM UTC
She took a Motrin
And she immediately dissolved
Because all she had was pain
Oct 19, 2015
Oct 19, 2015 at 1:33 PM UTC
Anodyne eye's
Narcotic lip's;
Analgesic kisses
Tranquilizer hip's.
Soporific eyebrow's
Lashes Heavensent;
Skin anesthetic,
Relieving me of
Death. Morphine
Amour', ***** bliss,
Painkiller door's; to
Thine soul I feedeth.
Thy voice a sedative,
Thine hair calmative,
As thy nose maketh
Me warm when I'm cold,
As an expensive wine, or
neuroleptic. I'm higher then
The universe, inside of thy
psyche; it's cozy there, none
Place to compare, I'm at home,
Simply: wherein all is right.
©Brandon Nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry
©Earl Jane Nagley (Filipino rose) dedication
Nov 29, 2015
Nov 29, 2015 at 2:46 AM UTC