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Pen Lux Feb 2013
wet fingers
touch my face
all nervous and
unbalanced.

perception
rips out of my throat
so fast that it's sore when morning breaks.
I feel the rising and almost shake
it's time for another eighteen hour day.

red teeth creep into my thoughts
and the bottle in the cabinet begins to knock:
here I am, baby, drink me if you can.
if you've got the time, try not to lose your motivation.
plans can't cure this hesitation.
perspiration from more than just nervousness, what's this?
it's the eyeballs teaching you a lesson,
it's the heartbeat just wanting to leave a mess in
what you thought you could contain
in the muddied cave you call a brain,
it's the endless pits of despair you so often hear tales of.
thinking, "Oh, you silly people, pet the belly of the beast
and you'll be free."

kissing the *** of an evil spirit will leave you with less progress
than if you washed the feet of an angel with your tears.  

insides burning with lust for flesh, for a cool comfort
you can bury yourself in. if your expectations grace you with
their absence and your mind feels free enough to explore,
then share your thoughts with me this evening,
I'll give you my heart as an open door.
jpl Jun 2013
Today, on the streets of NYC
or London, I passed a future president
in his stride, and I passed a disgraced
soldier, discharged for discharging
a round of ammunition on his friend,
I passed a man whose uncle was
Neil Armstrong, and a woman whose
face was drenched in acid by
an evil ex-boyfriend.
I was walking along the Champs Elysees,
today, when I smiled at a man who
is a relative of Gustav Eiffel, perhaps
even his grandson, or more. He was wearing
a suit, a normal, plainly dressed man
blending in.
Today, as I wandered past the skyline of
Vancouver, Chicago, Shanghai, a little girl
cried, and cried and cried. She’s to become the
scientist to cure cancer, the common cold,
or more. She has blonde pigtails and a giant
pink ribbon in her hair.
Underneath the Japanese bloom,
the leader of a gang stopped in front
of me to admire the white blossom,
and I did the same. Perhaps we
shared a word or two, me not knowing this man’s
crime. He not knowing mine.

Underneath all bloom in all the world,
seven billion future presidents,
seven billion disgraced soldiers,
descendants of astronauts,
acid scoured people,
seven billion Mr or Mrs Eiffels,
seven billion cancer curers,
and mob leaders walk their walk
and talk their talk.
No beacon shines upon them
and no beacon ever will.
Retrograded renegade
Bluntly severed runaway
Recomposing rogue of ruin
Rotting in the righteous rain
After the leaves and acorns
Yet before the frost and snow
They say it's only confusion
Artwork by Vincent Van Gogh
Through the blurs of unsettled motion
Vaguely with cloud covered eyes I see
A struggle to remember whatever happened
Interrupted by foreign memories
Not something from which you recover
Not something the curers can find
A plague without satisfaction
This is no cure for the colorless mind

--Christian J. Clark
Possibly the most emotional & cryptic piece I've ever written about myself
Orion Schwalm Jan 2017
Wholeness.
Whole-grain fullness.
Plump gun powder keg.
Ready to ignite.
Stillness.
Still felt helpless.
Ignition counteractive.
Writhing in the light.
Wilful.
Triumphant.
The better part of something.
The whole respect of nothing.
Bring sleeplessness a cure.
Rend ugly new allure.
Inspect the intro.
Respect the retro.
inflate the softened stone
a breath will bring you home
AM Apr 2016
the end is drawing near
following the love I kept hidden
got itself even more clear
but no place in the future
ever write a slightest hope
about you being in love with me
and I'm running out of cure
for another heartbreak
Aaron Wallis Feb 2014
A lowly wooden bench lent itself to a lonesome aged narrow man in a common garden in the smallest hour of the day’s beginning. In the thick haze of the summer’s waking light the common is thinly met with the company of others. Just an old man and his acquainted bench who came to give his eyes sight to the grass and trees, and to rid himself of thought.
He and the bench creak as he sits back; clutching at the satchel veiled among his dull drudged garb that bleeds into his pallid slack and cracked skin.
The wiry hairs bushed around his nostrils recoil to the deep inhale before the sigh, his yawning blue eyes sliding behind a milky glaze follow a bushy tailed rodent hurry into the confidence of a tree.
Through all nonchalance a pair of hobgoblin lugs under a brown woollen hat slides up the flanks of his head to outlying drowned tones of laddish laughs and lewd levity, an unseen clutch of kids filling the common’s spread with their foolish louting prances. Intimidating the preferred and performed with their innocuous idiocies; a mere asocial array of follies without the thought of good manner.
The thoughts of the old man are only briefly drawn; his ears leave the sounds of reckless recreation and back to the hushing song of the swaying grass, the rustling shake of the seasoned leaves on gorged and drooping branches. To his own wilted waning heart, the tremors, quiver and shivers within his own cage, his thoughts turned to his own temporal passage and to the re-joining of his love, of whom no longer lays her head on his shoulder, whom no longer wraps herself around his arm on the lowly park bench.
His lowest lip gives to an emotive tremble as he heaves himself over to the hem of the seat, his hands without any other part to play; frenetically tickle one another with frail kinked fingers.
With what little his body has left to give the eyes well to the upmost point of a tear, as he feels the weight of his wallet in his side trouser pocket against the rough of his skin. Where there within lays an image of a most loved face in a prized time, so that it may be remembered so it may fetch ease to a remittent floundering morsel of a man who could justly with the dead.
The photograph within his keeping need not be looked upon from under the shine of a laminated holding; it needs only to be there, only to be known that it is there.
The satchel was undid and fetched from within the clutter came an elderly notebook now held in his hands. A phlegmy husk of something said breeches his gummy chops, and he spits as he spat shouting out at the still of the garden.
“You should always write more than you do,” she would say, “you are better for it when you do and it lifts me as it does you, when you do.”
The old man reads from the notebook with a weak hate for the world.

“Am I for the worms yet? Am I to be from this rock?
Am I not yet too mad for this mad maddening world?
Four corners of an empty house, a homeless place of curling wallpaper and aloneness for company.
A room in a vagrant house with no light to fill it with a decrepit fool for a keeper
His stink stinks the walls for days as the blow flies form a speckled haze as they feast in filth of his unnoticed demise
With no manner of intention and for relation or friend, there is no cause and no mention for any to attend
He will rot with the house and his memory with it, with his memory does his love die and together they are ghosts in a world where ghosts do not exist.”

The old man pauses as he forcibly triggers one finger to his temple and ***** in his lips. His empty cries fall to a mumble as his hands tremble with his dear notebook in their grasp.

“Take me now cruel are the fates, take me now and rid me
The worms will welcome me, my flesh for an endless night
My life for a world without this life, for a life without his world
I would hold with a brim smile if it was not for my memory of her, if she was not to be lost at the close of this stint
I know not or want knowledge; I seek not of a design and not of meaning
Just a cure for this affliction for my must to her who brings me so much sorrow
Through blissful ages I can no longer hold, and can barely recall
We are all just people who will soon be once living, to be unlived and to forget is a conflict in myself
I have no answer as I have no question, you can have no answer to a question you do not seek nor ask
I dare not speak but I have no end for this, I have no solace and I have no end.”
The old man; the poor old man began to close his dear aged notebook and find the need to bring a smile, perhaps a moment of lunacy to calm the tightening knot beneath his breast.
He pulled a scratching cackle from the pit, wild and uncooked wiping the drool from the crook of his maw with the back of his blotched, mottled hand.
The old man found some seconds of a stoic amenity as his wild eyes grew gallant for those mere moments before the grey metal heft of his sullen vesture fell to his shoulders, he became heavy once more as the world retook him and cloaked again in the present - the light ebbed from him as swiftly as it came. The old man reproached his satchel to humbly return his dear old notebook.
There was a crack like a pick to ice with a hollow thud like a boot to wood as an immediately dissipating claret mist fizzed above his head. The make shift found-about cosh still swinging through the air and over his crown, the old man’s wilted body twisted and slumped to the floor face first. The concrete path before him tearing at the skin of his chin, his frail bones cracked as the meagre weight of his body forced itself into his neck. Laying perverse and unnatural the life was soaked up into his woollen hat and out across the concrete, to the grass – to the worms that writhed below the muck. His eyes were as lifeless as they were when he lived.
They did not wait for the gentle hiss of the spray or the bubbles that popped in the pool that surrounded the old man. They had snatched the satchel and ran off into the spread of the common until they were nothing but outlying drowned tones of laddish laughs and lewd levity.
Crazy old *******.
A lowly wooden bench has lent itself to a lonesome aged narrow man in a common garden in the smallest hour of the day’s beginning. In the thick haze of the summer’s waking light the common is thinly met with the company of others. Just an old man and his acquainted bench who came to give his eyes sight to the grass and trees, and to rid himself of thought.
I wanted to look at the people we never notice or avoid and there potential differences, whether it be an old crazy man on a bench or a group of youths in hoods. I wanted to follow the man though and his reason for him to be sitting in the bench a momentary peak into his life. I also tried to paint a scene with a little detail as I could. I only hope it all worked.
SZ Feb 2015
Apparently writing down all the things I hate about you is supposed to help me get over you, but I'm not so sure it'll work because everything I hated about you was also everything I loved about you. And I hated how you even made me think of the word love even if it wasn't literally toward you. That doesn't really make sense but then again, neither did you, and neither do I, or anything really.

I loved how different we were because it meant things never got boring but I also hated how we never had anything in common and couldn't agree on anything half the time. Sometimes I wished you were someone else but then I would take that wish back because who knows how things would have been if you weren't you? I once told you about an ******* that made me upset and you said you would beat him up for me. It was really cute because we both knew you wouldn't even win in a fight against me. I loved how carefree you were. I never once saw you mad. It was probably my favorite thing about you, I wish I could've been more like you in that sense. But at the same time I hated how you didn't seem to care about anything at all, because did you even care about me?

You must have cared because you always picked up the phone when I called you, even at 2 in the morning, whether you were asleep or had an exam the next day. You were always the person I called at odd hours because you never questioned it. You never asked me why I called. You never asked me why I wasn't asleep yet. You didn't think it was weird when as soon as you picked up, before you could even say hi, I would ask you to tell me a story or tell me every single detail of your day. You would just start and you would keep going until I finally laughed. You knew I needed you as a distraction and you didn't even mind being used that way.

I loved how you always said my name, the way you just slipped it onto the end of sentences and questions. I didn't know I could fall in love with the way my name sounds coming out of someone's mouth and even now, I haven't found anyone that says it better than you. I remember when you called me the first time you ever got drunk and you kept saying my name over and over. In that moment, I could've sworn I was in love. But I also hated it because it was like you were making me out to be something I wasn't. I couldn't possibly be as perfect as you made my name sound.

It was like you could always tell what my mood was and you adjusted yourself to fit my mood. I loved how you understood when I didn't want to talk about some things and you would never push me to, you would just change the subject. Sure, that was what I wanted most of the time, but I hated that you didn't know that sometimes even when I don't want to talk about it, I actually do, and all I wanted was for you to hug me and tell me it'll be alright even if I would never believe it.

I came to work once after a night of crying and I think I covered it up pretty well with makeup but you saw through it as soon as you saw me. You were asking me what was wrong before I even fully stood in front of you. And you said I looked sad but at the time you didn't know that I was always ******* sad. You were the only person that day to see through my smile. I think you came closest to understanding me and that terrified me because I couldn't understand myself and I don't know if I want to.

I still remember when you told me that you were holding me back. You said it as a joke but I think we both felt the truth behind it. I loved that you wanted what was best for me but I hate how you didn't even try to make me stay. I probably wouldn't have and it would've never worked between us even if I did but **** I really wanted you to ask me to stay. Even if it broke you, I wanted to feel that you wanted me. I'm really sorry for how selfish I am.

But maybe you didn't really want me because you couldn't handle it. Because we both knew on those nights I called you at 2 in the morning, no matter how long you stayed on the phone with me and how much you made me laugh, I would still be crying myself to sleep when I hung up. How could you have thought that you were holding me back when I haven't even figured out where the **** I'm going? Or maybe you did mind being my distraction because I couldn't even figure out how I felt. Or maybe you knew I could never give you what a normal person deserved and maybe you figured out just how ****** up I am.

I don't even know what this is anymore. I was supposed to write about the things I hate about you but all I can think about is how much I hate myself and all the ways I hurt you when all I wanted was to stop myself from hurting. I once read something that said "you're not a bad person for the ways you tried to **** your sadness" so can you forgive me if you were the way I tried to **** my sadness? I'm sorry I tried to use you the same way I used the bottles and the bongs. I mean, even now, I can't tell if I actually liked you or if I just liked how you made me feel not so dead inside for a while. Sometimes I wonder if there's a difference between the two and if it even matters. But then again, I often wonder if anything ******* matters.

And I'm sorry I didn't tell you when I came back to town like I said I would but the truth is I wasn't sure if I wanted to see you or not. You were never a permanent cure, you were just a temporary painkiller and the crash when you wore off just added to everything else. That's why I didn't want to get close to you in the first place and that's why I hate you so ******* much. But I also can't.

And I still see you all the time in people that don't even look anything like you. I saw a man running across the street today and I swear to God I thought it was you but when I got closer I realized the man was probably at least 40. In crowded places I look for you and it makes me think of the time we went to a festival and you brought me home at 1:30 in the morning and **** I wish you had kissed me. But then again, I don't think either of us would have been able to handle the consequence of that.

I don't know how to end this, just like I didn't know how to say goodbye, which by the way, I am also sorry for. Even now, I am still wrapping my head around why we had to say goodbye. Because if circumstances had been different, if I was ******* different, maybe we could still be friends. Maybe we could have even worked out as more. Who ******* knows now? I shouldn't have gotten mad for no reason and walked away like that but how else was I supposed to leave without crying? God only knows I would hate you even more if you ever saw me cry.
You're a champ if you read the whole thing. This was mainly to get some things off my chest, sorry it's so long
James Mellin Nov 2013
Our hearts have been broken and my smile has been stolen.
We where a mask to hide our faces, we live in a world
prepared to shoot us down but would they ever fill up
our empty spaces?

The chords to my heart have been plucked and played as if it were
a guitar, every time I start to believe I get left with another scarr.

You are the emotion to my song
you are the melody that I oh so long......

As night falls I'll wake from my hell
some may call my mind I'll do this all
to just pull you near and hold you tight.

I've lost so many of my fears and I'll keep
pushing forward till I've dried the very
last of your tears.......

If you have the strength to believe me then I'll summon
what's left of my soul and use every ounce of my burnt
out spirit to give you a life worth living for. And I
know through the eyes of an angel I'll see every clouds
silver lining.

I'll be with you till after forever even when your hands
turn cold and your heart stops beating.

You are the emotion to my song you are the missing chord
that belongs.

So lets embrace this moment lets cherish this beautiful kiss
I love you my cure to the darkness now let me be your
hero you changed this broken soul and I finally believe I'm no zero.
Paul Donnell Nov 2014
If you took away all my sadness
and useless rage.
I'm afraid there wouldn't be
Much left standing.
So I'm not asking for
Your cure.
I just need a few bucks
So I can drink,
With my friends.

So maybe tonight won't be
So God ****** rough.

Music is my medicine
but lately,
It's not workin'
I'm ganna need a double dose,
To feel alright.
So I'll blast crystals to my cranium,
So I don't feel so low.
I'll play my guitar and sing
until my lungs explode.

So maybe tonight won't be
So God ****** rough.
She is a flower
Out to glamorize everything she touches
And everything she sets foot on

She is a flower
Admired for her beauty
That casts light on your gloomy day

She is a flower
Your object of adoration
Where your loyalty lies

She is a flower
A cure to the sickness
Unfolding within you

She is the flower
You picked up rashly
And took away from where she’s supposed to be

She is the flower
Caged in the vase locked in your dark room
No one else can see

She is the flower
Stray in your heart
That blocks the daylight she deserves to indulge herself in

She is the flower
You so much care for
That she wilts in your selfish hands
Isabelle Perla Mar 2015
If love is a temptation, i am a sinner
If love is a habit, i am an addict
If love is a weight, tie me onto it,
If love is a burden, i want to embrace it.
If love is something i can touch and feel
If love is something i know is real,
i want to hold it close to me for longer than life.
If love is a question, my answer is yes
if love wasn’t here, i wouldn’t be, so i guess
that If love is a lie, i am not alive.
If love is what everyone dreams of, but most fall short
i want to love love that is definitely worth
the pain and the sadness, because love is a virus.
but If love was a sickness, and If i was offered a cure
i would refuse, and come back for more.
Mike Hauser Oct 2014
Hello Dr. Phil, have you got a segment
I've got a few things latched onto my mind
Don't worry this won't take but a second
If you do me this I'll return the favor in kind

Hello Dr. Phil, it's about my mother
Well really both her and my mother in-law
If you care to throw my wife into the picture
That wouldn't be far off at all

Hello Dr. Phil, have you run into this problem
Or am I a first and is there a cure
Call me right back Doc, I think I can take it
Can you tell me how much longer I've got in this world

Hello Dr. Phil, you might recognize me
I've been to see Oz and those Dr's on Channel 4
Though they canceled my moment said I was clingly and needy
Hello Dr. Phil, can I be a friend of yours

Hello Dr. Phil, have I mentioned the aliens
Do you do abductions, is that your forte
Cause if you do I can get you more ratings
We'll bowl over Maury he'll have nothing to say

Hello Dr. Phil*, I keep calling and calling
The heavy breathing? Yea, could be me on the line
But if you would answer neither of us would stress out
We could solve both our problems if you'd just give me the time
FS Antemesaris Aug 2016
A Revolution rumbles under the noses of the ignorant.
Silent, but not voiceless.
Gentle, but not weak.
Pacific pandemonium pulses privately
Illegal thoughts fire through the neurons of millions
Banned words are proclaimed fearlessly.

Death is threatened to the revolutionaries.
But they have already been promised life.
"Have no fear" shouts their leader,
"For they cannot **** the soul."
How far will they go to break the mold?
They ask, "For how much was your soul sold?"

The revolt is by those whose souls are free
It is the cure for a universal disease.
The revolution will bring the powerful to their knees
And the enslaved to their release.
They beg: "Join us..."
"Be free."
Josh Carlsen Feb 2019
Reclaiming my time


18 years spent wasting away

I’m a lost scavenger every new day

Time spent searching desperately

For new eyes to help me see

The key that will lock away the disease

I’ll probably never live a life at ease


Reclaiming my time


Time spent running around

When I should have stayed sound

To drift into space I am bound

I wasted all my chances I found


Reclaiming my time


Time spent hiding myself

In a lonely closet

upon the highest shelf

Only fear and lost memories I own

I’m left here suffocating being so alone


Reclaiming my time


Time spent hurting others

When I needed a friend

The cycle of anger and guilt

Is an awful trend

Until I come to terms

It will never end


Reclaiming my time


Time spent trying to get me fixed

In the process locking me away

Killing off what was left of me

While others got to laugh and play

They were looking for a cure

The pills have done a job on me I’m sure


Reclaiming my time


Time spent being left out

Everyone has their clique

They don’t know what I’m about

I’m just a ghost

But I still grieve the most

On the inside I died

That something my shades can’t hide


Reclaiming my time


Time spent watching my family break

My father lost inside his own dark world

He often said he lived in hell

My parents split, the household fell

I never knew my dad when he was well


Reclaiming my time


One day I’ll cross over

To the other side

My days were short

But God I tried

The angel said

“Your here too early, that such a crime.”

I said “All I’m doing here is reclaiming my time
bobby burns Dec 2012
it bothers me that
arpeggiated piano
still incites in me
[saudade(for you)] on
these empty evenings;
and it bothers me that
this silly irish girl
feels the same way
i do, and that your
sister shares a name
rooted in gaelic, just
like her; and now i
might be grasping
at straws, but never
have i told a bigger
truth than when i
say i find the most
arbitrary ways to
remind myself of
you, or accurately,
the lacking thereof.

and it bothers me that
the only seeming cure
is to purge (myself) of
you with [ballads sung
by sobbing ivory keys],
like [baking soda] to a
(bee sting), drawing
out the venom drops
of your last acidic kisses,
and neutralizing them
in the stark alkalinity
of these spare words,
little more than dimes
dropped into the tin
cup or upturned hat
of the beggar i have
become.
Saudade - a unique Portuguese word that has no immediate translation in English. Saudade describes a deep emotional state of nostalgic longing for an absent something or someone that one loves.
B J Clement Jun 2014
The Australian desert can be very cold at night. It was the cold that woke us early in the morning. We were all eager to be off, and we soon found ourselves drumming along the metalled road leading to the airstrip, in an ex military four by four open topped vehicle. By the time we got there we were all frozen, and waiting for the Sun to warm us up. The pilot asked us if we would donate a shirt, the fitters were doubtful whether they had been able to stop the leakage, they intended to stuff rags into the filler pipes  to see if that would help. The pilot had second thoughts, and decided to try without, he thought there might be a danger of blocking the fuel lines, so we took off again to **** it and see,(an old tried and trusted technique in The Royal Air Force, aparrently.)Twenty minutes later, we were back on the tarmack once more ,stuffing the remains of my shirt into the fuel filler pipes. This did not cure the problem, but it did alleviate it to a degree.  The Pilot calculated that instead of being able to do twelve hundred mile (hops). we could manage three hundred miles. and there were small airstrips with refuelling facilities within range. "We should be ok, fingers crossed." I liked his confidence, and sat watching the wings slowly leaking our fuel into a thin vapour trail, as we flew along over the outback desert land. We landed several times I think, by then I was so tired that my brain craved sleep. The only stop I can remember was a cattle station at Leigh Creek, it was the last stop before Edinborogh Fields,near Adelaide. I wondered "And then what?" No one was able to tell us why we were in OZ!!
Georgiana S Feb 2011
Sing me songs of farewell
This red shaded dawn,
Recite me lines about unknown -
Please, recite them well.

Let your tongue disguise the words,
Make them look fair
While I'm statued in life's ropes
Tied to this porcelain cold chair.

Speak loud, stand proud -
Then look at me straight.
Let your shadow strangle my neck,
Bathed in my acid tears around.

It's neither's fault, you say...
Only this mischievious cicle
A clueless timed canvas,
That lead you feel this way.

I can't scream, can't defend.
I only let the ending end.
Take your promises back,
Take your tender looks too,
Burn each of one's illusions,
******* their ashes, take them with you.

Don't leave me your apologies,
Your blured confusions...
Just leave me here,
In eternity's fusions
Drowned in a heart attack.

The years have passed away.
My hands still tremble, mildly.
Wrapped in pottery shards and blindly
This disease have rot me inside
It's what they say...

In fact, I died at the bottom of the sea.
The cure is simple and hopeless to me.
Give me a pill of amnesia
And my five o'clock tea.
Georgiana.S 2011
SerenaDuru Sep 2021
Had I known you would leave me, my love, I would never have reached my finger tips in your direction.

How cruel is your absence, that I find myself cursing every thought of you. How cruel is your willingness to leave me to live or die… Had I known how cruel you were I never would have loved you.

I wish and wish and wish that I could hold you in my arms, and feel you breathing for me. I love you, and I hate myself for loving you.

I wish that I could forget you, but what a useless world that is. You don’t love me, and I scream in pain because I know you don’t love me. But I am not completely insane, you made love to me as if we were the only two people here…

I wish that I could be relieved from this pain, but you are the remedy and you don’t want to cure me anymore. You want to forget me, and that I could never understand… why forget a love that would put angels to shame…
Sethnicity Jul 2015
They only want to hear of your suffering
They only whistle while you toil
They only #treadringsonagainonyour soul
So we lay down tar and feather quill to papier-mâché a roadway from our broken heart artery and bleed the anguish out into to a milkyworldwideweb.away to cure the Treading on Agony, be numb to the likes along the highway revel in the thin line between heaven and earth let your feet rise above your head and let your hand be the rubber on the road of revelations.
Response to "Trending on Agony" by Shanna Stojakovich
Infamous one Apr 2013
The past should defy you but live in the presents
Everyday is a new day a fresh start
Learn from your mistakes do your best not to make the sameones
I wake up saying today ill be someone make a name for myself
I love softball be a coach help the girls
I coach be the best in the league
Improvement and get better hope the make the high school team.
I like to do MMA bag work do it right be sore but a move towards goal achieve greatness be the next champ be
the trainer whole shares all he knows
respect and love helps the sport grow
Years of getting beat up now its time to move up
Always writing stories writing down moments of my life I feel grown up more mature
Success is the cure to defeat I'm not talking but doing my thing
One day take what I love to another level mainstream main event I'm doing what I love that's the main thing
Sam Luna Nov 2021
I'm in a dimension
Where everything is nothing
And nothing is everything
Like you and me

Like catching wind with your hands
You felt it
Yet you got nothing

Like using chopsticks to scoop water
The sticks got wet
But you scooped nothing

They say,
Prevention is better than cure
But I say,
Experience is a better teacher.

Let me wait
But if it means forever
Then let me wait forever
Regina Williams Oct 2024
the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
i’m cold,
and my shaking fingers are
shooting missiles toward you from
fifteen miles away.
texting is the worst form of communication.

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
can’t you ever answer the
******* phone when i call you?
do you even love me? do you
care that i’m in pain?
do you care that i’m waiting here,
alone, cold,
while you have your car and
some other ***** snuggled up under your arm?

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
what am i supposed to do,
leave you when you say you don’t care about me?
others have told me that i’m resilient
and i don’t want to make liars out of my friends.
i can take this. i can take this.
i’m not afraid of pain.
keep hurting me. tell me to **** myself
and i’ll kiss your calloused fingers
and worship you like nothing else.
i am on my knees
and the lentils you had me kneel on
are beginning to cut through my skin.
baby? do we still call each other,
baby?

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
do you remember that morning
when you called me a fat ******* *****
because i spilled coffee all over the kitchen floor?
do you? because i do.
and i would crawl through the coffee and the
scattered glass like a dead man does through hell,
trying to get to something better
but knowing they never will.

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
i am not crazy.
well, i am crazy.
but i’m not crazy here.
here, i need you to hear me.
don’t just say you do-
actually do it.
pull my heart out and look how it
pulsates with love.
every beat was made for you
and you just won’t look.
you won’t listen.

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
i have put my hands
through blazing fire to
soothe your enormous ego
and you can’t pick me up
from the ******* bus stop.
****! what’s a girl got to do
to find a man that will
lick her wounds and devour
her fears? am i not worthy of love?
should i just **** myself?

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
i’m a mistake. i am unlovable.
i am a ruined being left alone by God to
suffer in this hell we call life.
everything he says about me is right.
i’m difficult. i cry too much. i’m too depressed.
i’m crazy. i’m crazy. i’m crazy.

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
what was i thinking?
i don’t need a man. i don’t need anyone!
i am more godly than anything up in the sky
or beneath the earth!
i am the vacuum of space
and i’ll suffocate those who think
i’m anything less than perfect.
why won’t he pick up
the ******* phone?

the bus is coming
and it’s raining outside.
i check my phone.
it’s 7:11pm.
the bus isn’t coming.
i don’t think it ever was.
This is a fake scenario. No person was a real victim of abuse. No persons were harmed in the making of this poem. This is a work of fiction. It is a look into the mind of someone with borderline personality disorder, spoken as a woman with BPD.
Jet Dec 2020
Mobile/Stabile - I don’t speak French

Main two types of mainly 3D artist
Alexander “sandy” Calder

Mobile - is a French pun meaning both "motion" and "motive"

If you had one of these above your crib to muse over as you drifted to dreamland, you have Sandy to thank.

Stabile-  following the style of the name mobile, is a sculpture that is unmovable

Both are French words I have trouble saying


I am becoming or was becoming paralyzed from my feet up
(they still haven’t decided which,
feel free to laugh at that)

Feel free to laugh at all of it, I do

I have complications from unbeknownst year long scarlet fever that turned into rheumatic fever that turned into julian Barre to thank for that.

There is no cure, so I’m using condescension.
I call it Julian Barre because “Gee YAWN BERET” is just so **** hard to eek out.
And
It requires more pomp than it deserves

Okay it’s part condescension and part more French words I can’t quite say.

It’s sort of like the opposite of when I try to say  “petit” pwessON” to be cute, I mean to say Little Fish to address my partner:

But instead say “petit pwazOne” which means
little Poison
Originally performed at iFell Gallery on November 30, 2019
Evelyn Colbolt May 2012
these tears only fall for you
but the pain only i bring up
crying at the open slit of my emotions
cut and bleed
but still your there
taking away my heart away from my shattered hope
with only that one part of me you have the ability to cure me
as if i been resurrected
so alive once again
with your eternal promise
leaving death a pointless matter
I'd rather not have my worthless suicide take my soul to drown in hell
but prefer your revengeful beautiful ****** be it so
i love you enough to allow you to **** me
I'll give you the dark satisfaction
but as entwine our hearts are, let it be death together we'll face
with you and only you my love
Renee Chandler May 2014
Sitting on the edge of the bed,
Un-made twisted sheets,
Muttering to myself,
picking at the scabs under my lily-white purified skin
wondering when the door will come crashing in.
Knowing I’ve only a few moments,
Time with my crucifix, moments with my notepad
Before the time slips beneath the door and invites the others in.
****** knuckles, parched lips,
The compounded inhaled taste of her hips,
Dripping through the catheter,
tiny atoms of my being wrestling for space.
I’ve finished this course of treatment,
The next week will bring more pills, extra tubing
Lack of hope in plain sight
Salmabanu Hatim Jan 2018
A young man from Srinagar,
Was born with anger,
Which was a part of his manner.
He would flare up suddenly,
Vent his anger violently,
Fume and seethe at everyone,
Friends he had none.
His parents were worried,
To many counsellors they scurried,
But with little avail,
In torment they could only wail.
One day an old sage came to town,
He was well known
To cure people with anger and demon.
He looked deep into the boy's
Anger filled eyes.
I see no demon,
Only anger venom.
He recited some tantric  words a bit,
Young man, take this amulet,
Wear it day and night.
Throw out of the window disparity,
Learn to do charity,
See how others suffer,
With no one their sorrow to buffer.
Go for yoga and meditation,
To control your anger addiction.
That's my  advice,
For good  overcomes the vice.
For some time the boy joined an ashram.He came out a better person.
To some
He’s born
On the wrong
part of the world

To others he’s above
Prime amidst the odds
Intelligencial murr
Diamond in the ruff
A young god
Or more

To some
He’s nut
Who knows not
What is right and what is wrong
Opposite wise;  probably curse
By the gods

To others he’s just a dude
From the hood
Who walk around with fade blue hat
On stitch rag and sewed bag
Striving; even with his bruised heart
Trying to rebuild his confused path

To some
He’s a dawg
Who dresses poor
Whose sense is bore
Whose thought needs cure
A piece of junk
Lilly-knight of the lost

To others he’s tore
Been through a lot
Take a trip to his world
Through his sea and shore
You wont make it back bros

To some he’s dumb
Somewhat numb
Fault
Paralysically not
Senserable to hurt
*
But for real; he’s just a boy
Who doesn’t need to be judge
For what he is or not
Can’t you see his strug'
He’s just a boy from the slum
Trying to make it to the top
you
n i perceive reality in our own view
too
how the world a skew

and each rue
while mind each "p" n "q"
of societal mores mebbe at a pew
or in a car brand new

that purrs like a "meow"
or even on the loo
'bout a lover ye knew
thinking of gentile or jew

now tis that does hew
a friendship that mite grew
cuz quality gals so far n few
like finding a miniature red
   white striped emu
like eeyore - feel in ivy blue.
---------------------------------------

sorry for all dis bather
   me lass of an heart felt ace
& hope no words o mine base
so lemme cut to the Chevy driven chase

to relish c ying ur face
yi yi yippee - thy grace
****** desires to gather
   at what e'er pace

cuz dis haint no race
for us to trace
an arc &
   compete with lovers
   that for e'er frieze on grecian vase.
---------------------------------------

which day
whether sunny or gray
as high r low clouds lay
like pair a moors

   or nags in may
would be okay
to...play
oye vay
and enjoy
   hot ravenous ja way?
---------------------------------------

this chap aint no a rod
   knee nor danger
concocting a fiction
   be yin born in a manger
neither does he don
   role of ranger
thou veritable stranger

THOUGH A VERITABLE UNKNOWN GAL 2 ME
NONETHELESS, I MUST BE GOING STIR CRAZY FOR YOU! ™

---------------------------------------

hi yam hankering Asian urge gent wuss
celibate lee  married, a zealous adult tour us
desires to tuss
sill with a female,
   no not necessarily
   her coiled n kinked

   hair to muss
nor special outfit to fuss
i try not to ******* cuss
nor cause no trouble
   if aboard the digital bus.
---------------------------------------
PLEASE be patient with him. In due time, his ability to calm down and control the erectile fusillade will chime with YOUR ******.

HE well deserves to end this celibate state and get requisite COMEUPPANCE!
---------------------------------------
Hello Sin Come on In!

I thoroughly enjoy plying (like a baker kneading dough) these slender and smallish fingers at the juncture of neck and shoulders. As many cumulative kinks would be ironed out. Muscles and tendons on either side of the spine (from stem to stern) privy to tender loving care. Special emphasis would be given to any particularly sore area. Perhaps an especially noticeable ache exists along the upper or lower back? Just the appropriate amount of (gentle) pressure - from the heal of one hand or the other - called into action.

Might forearms or biceps be in sore need of massage? Gluteus Maximus saddle sore? How about thighs? Any other parts of your anatomy require skin nourishment? This willingness to manipulate knotty points of tension offered for passionate physical *******. Game? No need to think this hum bull guy wood MONOPOLIZE you NOR doth ye need to feel SORRY if nada one iota of interest exists!
---------------------------------------
unsure...
  
what this free thinker
   who lives ~10 miles north east
   of valley forge, penna ought to write
also not knowing
   if rambling comes a
   cross as trite

maybe filled with angry under
   panting tones awash
   with spittle and spite
veering considerably
   left of political right

which liberal democratic
   leanings correct quite
   an attempt to come across
   as mature and polite

hoping to induce interest
   to get together
   some day or night
discussing topics
   profound or light

or...letting sexually intimate
   fantasies (of mine)
   take supersonic flight
restoring darkened psyche
   with high octane
   self generated energy bright.

only one finger
used to hen peck
and types this
four tee billionth acre

doth, dis dude
real soon will take a break
eat sum petrified cake
like an ancient yodel,
ring ding or drake

interestingly enough
can cure any earache
with nary an edible flake
mebbe jump in a

poker face booked - mud flat lake
steal away imagining to make
out with you,
a moist meaty milky shake.

i yam ma nada trip pin
jist over dose sin
n wanna marry gin.

star-date = 9999 anno domino;
time = 1700: 39:_ pm

u r a be u tee
only in imaginary will i see
u re joy sing -
for me
as glee
from one male sassy thee
sets passions free.

like one pac man on a roll
   bell ringing canon,
   fast moving caboose
or mad as hell
   headless goose

this josh hing drake
   haint butta loose
goose
whereby moose

uh d utter creatures
   tink i lack mental juice
i.e. ja dat - right duh gray matter
   of dis knit wit,

   the "infamous" deduce
cob bulled with
   whirled wide web
   peppered with rotten cous cous
& find my rye ting
   an absolute nuisance
ready to call doktor Zeus.

— The End —