I am like a piece of dirt down by the site of the river
who refused to be blown by the wind
I looking down at myself for being so filthy
Useless to myself and my environment
what can I do?
I'd looked at you for the very first time and couldn't tell our difference
it felt like we've been together in the life that passed
the life we can't remember
who we was or what we were
Deep down you wet soul i can feel the emptiness deep down
i know you're in love with someone else like i was before you
but by now
i think you should have know for yourself
we're both rejects

The earth will unit and break again
Time will pass and things shall change
But breaking us will be hard to do.
Cause ...
We're soul stuck

In my dream you are mine.

But in my life you are a beautiful dream,

You are my soul
My very Existence
My beautiful soul

that could give me an eternal life.
Maybe worst

I am scared of you, My weakness : endless breathing
But the things I think I can not say.
I wanna tell you!

Yes, I am a good writer
at least that helps me sleep

I've made the most important discovery of my life,
Only if I'm right

It's only in the mysterious equation of love,
and some incredible feelings I can't for myself understand

that inspired the multiple universes around me and changed my being,

You are my virtual world, I swear I only think of you
Days and Nights
hours and minutes
most of my lost seconds
I found them with you

In as much as I know my worth,
My worth, Even when I'm worth Nothing to you

I get scared when it comes to this.
one of my latest heart unfulfillable discovery

It was hard to find it, and now harder to solve,
what's worst?

It was like a dream to me as well as a great strive,
it still is that dream

But I said it earlier, You are mine only in my dreams

and that is the great power and the magic of love,
I keep saying love like I think it is real.
(What do I know)

Yes one thing i know is to write out what I feel

And What I feel I truly know

And I know that...

I love you although I've never met you,
with you I can stand up for anything,
even things I do not believe in
And if anything rings the bell.
Then I'll say it again;
with you I will stand up for everything
I love you though I've never met you,

Like two ends of a line
the difference is, this can not be defined
you changed my life and so my sky to blue.
i guess it was dark before
Or maybe it has always been blue but I now I see it Brighter
I love you though I never met you,
Why do I keep repeating: I love you like it's weighing on my brains
but in my dreams I really meet you.
Those dreams that i cannot stop smiling from when I wake
Every night : Everyday
Every time my eyes close be it day or night
I...(Don't want to repeat the line ) but I hardly know you

the few I know has mesmerized me
I... I can't help it
But I don't wanna get hurt.
That's right, I Love You But I'm Scared

It doesn't matter if i stay the rest of my life tell you I love you
It doesn't matter if I never stop trying to make a change in my life to please your loveliness
I sometimes believe that I am in need of a miracle
But wait
You are my miracle
I love you so much that I forget myself
I lose myself because you are desirable
To me
To my blind heart

Each time you hurt me I feel stronger to fall in love with you even harder
I think maybe you will love me someday but that's a queue
your heart has being programmed
this may never happen, you loving is that dream that Joseph had which will never come through...
But I hoped
Didn't stop hoping
ahahahahah
You told me yourself but I refused to listen
now it's the alcohol which is taking me to bed
I held the bottle of wine all night in the rain and well
I emptied the bottle
yes I did
throughout that night I had my heart fooled me
that you will be mine
if not now
later in the future
but that's just how he planned it
he will tell me that all the time
all because it is that blind
I need to do a surgery to save myself from
*My Blind heart

At the end of the day I am always the one in pains
The one crying
I am that lady who would prefer your lies than to get hurt by your truth
then when I find out about the truth I get mad at you for hiding it from me : I get hurt ... Yet I know I deserve better
I know the is a guy out there who know too much but not as much as he can hurt me
I think I have been pouring my affection on the wrong tree
and he has grown to always make me cry
I feel like am coursed... Cause though I know how much I am worth
Though you treat me ill
hurtful and cruel
My heart changes its destiny
I always cling back to you
I still follow my blind heart to your path
**** me to stop loving you cause
My blind heart will pull me towards you
forever!

What a fool am I to think a girl like you would ever love a guy like me?


I have nothing to attract your flawlessness.

All i can do is write out my feelings...

Telling them makes me feel jobless

Though no amount of words can tell how much I love you,

No amount of words can make you love me ;
Even a quarter of how much love I have for you

I want your love so bad...
Such that
I'll work for it

But does that count?

Does that even matter to you?

It really hurts...
But wait : are you even listening?

I am willing to learn another language...

I am willing to walk miles...

I am willing...
To speak in the tongue of love
I'll do it -

If at all there is a thing like "the tongue of love"

I will give my all to make you love me

Cry on my midnight candle...
Make wishes on all the stars by night ...

Even on the moon if it could grant them and I'll do same to the sun by day

I'll do anything

Cause

I am a "sucker for your love"

And I know it...
*@#NaxThanda

"I wanna take this day out for you".


Once I made that decision I ran out of ideas.

Should I just tell you I love you very much?

Should I write my heart out?

No I should work harder?


I should catch your heart without chasing it
I should wait for you
But how long?
How much more time?
What do I do now? that I am lost!
Confused!
Almost frustrated,
I should think about you?
I should think more about you...
Perhaps thinking about you have become my solution to many other problems
But will thinking bout you solve this issue?
This particular issue of me and you
This issue of you and I
I mean the issue of loving you beyond the number that represents the total stars in the sky
Nor that which represent the waters of the ocean
The issue or "troublem" of not being able to know if you have feelings for me
I mean the trouble of not understanding if you can love someone with such small heart as I have
Maybe its not big a problem after all.
Maybe
Just maybe I should be patient?
Oh okay maybes I should wait
Wait a little longer
Just a little
Little yet longer
Maybe I should wait
But
How Long
Just How Long
*~NaxThandaXxD~

I realized I was wrong,Wrong to have told you my feelings
Wrong to make you know how I thought about you
Wrong all the while for even hoping
It's a very bad thing I told you
Cause now we are universe apart

My soul separates from my being when you are not with me
when you hug another my heart faints, falling deep down my guts
something start stopping me from breathing

I can't think straight at any given time
I am volatile to my own expressions
My emotions can not be contained within me

My mind needs to be set off from my deepest worries

Every time I look at your picture, I can't believe you left me.
It breaks more than just my heart that you are gone.
This is more than a heartache

Though to the world you were just a person but to me you have always been the world
I miss you, The biggest void in my soul has been created by you
I loved you with every fluid in my being
Yours Affected

Goodbye

Text in the mist of the dark
When am so lonely, all alone fear parceling me with  thought of losing you, I'm frighten in such a way that my  soul shivers and my heart beat rises... then only when I start thinking about you,
That bright light from your smile or is it from your eyes, I think of your tender and soft lips how the move when you talk to me whispering into my ears
That make me to forget that I am in the dark.
I just think of you cute face and my night lights up
I just think of you and all is well
You are my rainbow

My Pearl
My Air
What you are to me Girl
Words just can't tell
So give me your ears
As I had withheld
What my whole heart felt
Now I will tell
Without no fear
I'll jump  into Hell
if that's what it takes
To fight for your love
You are my world

The air I breathe



Dedicated to Thando

No matter how many times you have proven me how unworthy I am
Still I fool my heart to believe we have a chance
I lean back in my bed and imagine how possible it is for me to just kiss you
how I could hold you in my small arms all day.
Just worship and adore you
Enchanted by your beauty,
My mind's firewall has collapsed,
My senses are frozen.
Now,
My feelings are numb

I fool myself to thinking it's all fine
My blind heart believed
My blind heart kept hoping
My blind heart held tight with hopes of never letting go

It hurts that you are with someone other than me
I can't give up this crush
I have tried,
Even with all the effort I put to forget you.
I just can't
I want to let you go
But I am obsessed with you
I crave for you love
I want you likeness
You've broken my defences

I consciously forget about you
But that is only temporal
It last only as long as I think of forgetting you
I can't blame you for looking Attractively Distracting.
I only blame
My blind her

Yet again I stand by you;
Though you are cold and silent,
tears fills my eyes and my countenance are overshadowed with Pain
The pain of losing you.

I could never believe this day will come to pass
When I shall speak and you listen in silent

Ah! Or
I made your speechless
You were my Nana and friend.

You are my star
Now I must learn to live in this Dark world without you,

I must learn to get used to not seeing you around

I bleed within my heart at your departure

Having you was the best thing that happened to me
Losing you is my nightmare

And I shall live with it hunting me till I die
I Love You
Nana

I  would be sad if you leave me

I will cry everyday like a little girl when you are away from me
If I don’t read letters with your name on it I will weep
and when my eyes swell up I will look n to the mirror
and cry harder

Though they may say true love waits
but I am not patient with you

You light my heart with a spark that puts me in a heist

I love you like am mad
My loving you is my weakness

And
I will live shorter on earth without you

I feel your pain

And it hurts my brain

I love to gain

Yet

I hate the pain

Oh what a shame
How I've turned  lame

When you came in to my life I started experiencing Love with no weakness
Even when I walk in deep darkness,
You were my brightness

Now;
where it feels almost impossible to breath
I can't see a thing

My loneliness has grown into the dept of my soul such that I  float in the ocean of my idle thought

I want to believe I still can feel love again but I am too scared to accept the truth
The feeling in my heart is like making a bed on roses
soft petals but hard thorns
thorns that go through my fragile heart

I want to love you
I want to give love a chance
I stay single
because I am scared

What you are is breath taking
slowly I lose my grounds
when you are with me time stop
Thing go smooth like ice melting in the sun
I want to talk with you
I want to say something
but i don't know the right words
I don't want to make a fool of myself

I don't want to lost my breath


you make me go

SpeechLess

I hate sick men

Cause sick men are cry babies

Cry Babies are women

Women are pearls

Pearls are treasures

And i can't treasure a sick man

but

I can treasure men