Crumbling.. changing, stumbling.. aware of..
the unattended now cold non brewing..
Sadness creeping..
Feelings of.. turning..
As I 'm searching sources of it..
Heartaches..
ahh ah ha.. There..
seems the warmth has no care.
Room check, maintenance request in room 5..
Heart chamber.. Private Estate.. wayside.
****.. it.. ok..
No quick fix..
without admit..
So yeah.. slow brewing storm.. of pain...
No fun.. no at ease..
no its coldness...On my sleeve.. sorry .......
@Me.._You..
Even a cold coffee of brew..
Including a cold *** of stew.
Sad cold.. turning to symptoms of flu...


By @Shardayes Poetry Room..
11.28.23

Sa mundong puno ng libu-libong pagdududa,
Bukod tanging sayo lang sumugal at nagtiwala.
Ngunit bakit sarili’y tila akin nang nalimutan,
Mas inuuna ang sayo kaysa sa aking nararamdaman.

Labis ang mga tanong na “paano na tayo?”,
Hindi na maisip kung “paano na ako?”,
Tama ba na sumugal at ilaban ko pa?
O mas mabuti na lang mag-isa?

I was there.

In times of need, I was there.
Hugging you tight, even though in pain. I stayed.
Always beside you even when I’m too weak to stand up.
When you needed me, I disregarded everything.
Every pain, every emotions, every single problems I have.
I stayed strong, because you needed me.

Endless chances, endless pain.
It doesn’t go away, but then I was still there.
At your darkest days and all the lies you made, I still believed.
But then where were you when I needed real help?
When I wanted to be better, why didn’t you believed?

I wanted to change, I wanted to make up for what I did.
I wanted to be better.
I wanted to be better.
I wanted to be better.
But then I’m all alone, in tears hugging myself.
No one believed and everyone else wants to leave.

Still, I stayed. I was always there.

I am a poet,
or I like to call myself one.
My heartaches and heartbreaks give life to empty pages;
I rarely compose from glorious days.
I’m inspired by the world, by people around me
but mostly by my pain.
I consider myself an introvert
for you will rarely hear me speak,
but on the other hand, I have much to say
just not with my lips
but with a pen.
I hide behind ink and paper
ready to write my feelings away.

I am the poetry that I write.

Bakit kaya ganun...
Nasasaktan ako kahit hindi dapat

Gusto ko umiyak...
Ngunit pawanag naubos na ang mga luha

Hahakbang pasulong...
Subalit tatlong tapak paurong

Pipiliting ayusin ang lahat...
Pero pawang gumuguho at mas gumugulo lang

Don't i deserve better...
Don't i deserve to be loved..
Don't i deserve to be happy without ever being afraid of failing again..

I loved you for who you are
In times of trouble is there
Ready to fight in gray
For my lover's lair

Sacrifice my happiness
For me not to see your sadness
I love you but what happened?
You fool me your maiden

I thought you will be my knight
With the darkest of night
With those beautiful sight
You leave me alone in the fight

I was betrayed
By you, the lover of mine
Until then, I was never fine
You choose her, I was done

In this battle I lost you
You found someone new
In the castle we build
Tonight I'm alone with no shield

I hope you're happy now
For leaving me behind
For the ties unwind
River of tears in my mind.

I see, breathe and
feel my heart
breaking a thousand times a day
I keep silence all through the day, the night
but when I go to sleep on my bed,
I remember each broken piece
like a still fresh bleed
Depriving me from night's peace
this is my sleep disease
All these heartaches control my night dreams
They won't cease till I cease.

heartaches hurt the most —
as if breathing takes
a lot of courage
and playing guitar
isn’t about the riffs anymore.
it’s as if tears
could choke you in pain
and every so often
they heavily pour.
usually, heartaches
could only be felt
in a sob or two;
but now heartaches are
random nights that
keep on haunting you.