I lean towards the evening sun
My body feels beloved and warm
My arms hold tight the wind's embrace
In leaves and blossoms I have raised
When flowers dance to breeze's chime
In golden dark and crimson shine
And night creeps over land and sea
As happiness and sunshine flee
My petals leave this bloom of me
And waltz to my last elegy.

I once was bald a long time ago
Those days were gone for so long though
I had grown my hair all summer long
It is strong
As it is beautiful.

I feel a chill down my spine
Wandering down the endless path
Till it reaches
My roots
The feet that touch the ground
Below
me

the ground
Where pieces of my hair
lie
My long beautiful hair is
  falling
    falling    
    ...
      falling out.

Every strand drops to
the ground

It won't
Stop
Dro
pp
ing
  Falling
Losing



I'm bald
I'm freezing


Warm Me

Warm waters ripple underneath my feet,
Mist softly caresses my surroundings like a fuzzy blanket,
Nothing but a warm wrap on a deathbed.
I'm flying.
The sea beneath my feet freezes as I descend upon it.
A catwalk to my judging headsman.
I refuse to walk.
I fly.
Without destination.
Without meaning.
Until you touched my hand and I turned around.

Within a forest of gray leaves
Like little flames devoid of heat
Missing their color like a ghost
Just shadows of what once had grown.

Enclosed by trunks and trees so lost,
Covered in twigs and withered moss,
Never been loved, never been found,
Just lonely bones above the ground.

Dead petals dance with ghostly plants
To frozen wind and silent chants,
A requiem of crumbling skulls,
A hymn for all their decayed hulls.

Silvery mists of countless lies,
Swallows all of the forest's cries,
Fog masks the guilt of countless sin
That brush and grass carry within.

Amidst all of this hopeless mold,
A shed stands strong against the cold,
A house so lonely yet so warm,
Held in the forest's dying arm.

The place where I once hid myself,
'tween ****** books in rotten shelves,
The place where I live on my own,
Made of my flesh and crimson bone.

Grab a feather
                                            Open your soul.

Grab some paper
                                         Make it your own.

And a small feather
                                             Shall be a brush,

And a small paper
                                        Your poems' canvas.

We are nothing but an empty shell,
Filling our voids with warm things to feel alive,
A composition of ravished corpses of once
Living beings that will warm our dead inside.

We are nothing but animals,
Playing human every day, faking empathy and emotion,
Playing God every day, ravaging and killing our host,
Beautiful lands left with nothing but corruption.

We are nothing but greed,
A broken people cutting their skin with green paper,
Pretending this is what true happiness means,
Killing each other for the bliss of coins.

Desperately fighting my rotten ego,
I pour blood into this empty vessel, the cage of my soul,
The core of a virus pretending to live righteously,
Yet I know that this version of me is indifferent.
A parasite.

But my heart is in shards.

On a lonely pier at night
Thousand lights dance in the distance
Me, I'm dimly lit by nothing
But a lantern near my side.
Bathing in its warmth and glory,
I look up to thank my giver-

rotten. eyes. stare. back. at. me.
dead flames
piercing
i. freeze
i run
run

run.

I feel my body fall off the pier
w a t e r
I sink into the lake I eyed

as my soul flees from my flesh
the lantern suffocates its spark
and i hear the screaming noises
of a thousand burning flames
endless choir of countless voices
singing 'long the sounds of death

And I
Remained quiet.

The moment I saw your face I knew
Nothing could ever satisfy my lust for you
And fate shall be my guardian angel to never leave your side
I knew that every part of me would crave your skin to touch just mine
And every inner part of me jealous of those very parts

I want to lick, to taste your skin
Want everything between my lips
I want to feel all of your skin
With more than just my fingertips

And I know that inside of you will never even please desires
I built up over all this time
And I know that each part of you on me will never meet my greed
To have it all just for myself

I want to cut your skin apart and find a shelter in your hull
I want to be close to your soul
And not just things that carry flesh

I want to have you in my blood
To flow within in my cramping veins
I need to have you in my blood
And feel you pump inside my heart

I need you to be one with me
Not ***, not bride, but one dead hull
That shelters both our souls within

That's all I'll ever ask of you
To stay with me forevermore.

Fingers dance to unheard song
Of melodies lost for so long
Like amber flowers never grown
A painting that was never drawn
Of hills - of grass - a blooming rose
Riddled with thorns it never chose
To hold back all that you have done
And keep its world of beauty sound
And reach another world of light
Unite these worlds in every night
Carry its beauty through this crack
To paint the dreams in midnight's black
And drown them in the ocean's blue
The sea that every creature knew
Swimming along the stream of time
Downhill thinking that love will thrive
Within this darkest night we're in
That nourishes this paper-thin
Weak hope that every man held dear
And suffocated in his fear
Yet we still find a place to rest
Peacefully like in nature's chest
To close this ring we walk along
And write down all these unheard songs.

A single snow falls from the sky.
It tells a tale of heaven
And happiness we once have lost
In greed and desperation.

Few flakes of snow drop from the sky.
They tell a tale of sorrow,
Of angels watching us with grief,
A world with no tomorrow.

Sheer endless snow comes from the sky.
It tells us tales of ravens,
They fly and view remains of God
Killed by His own creation.

A blizzard wraths upon this earth.
Carrying tales of hatred,
Burrying all that we have done
Cleansing this world we wasted.

I used to have a puppy,
I rang a bell once before I fed him, every day,
I knew he loved me even if he bit me every night,
Until I couldn't raise him any longer.
The puppy grew larger and larger and ate more.
More.
I rang the bell two times.
More. More.
Three times.
More. More. More.
I never rang the bell again.
I lost everything and couldn't afford any more food.
Then one night I abandoned him.

Years later he came back home.
A bony old stray dog.
He looked at me with puppy eyes and I,
I couldn't resist and fed him once more.
Just one time before sending him out into the cold again.
I held out my hand and he bit off my fingers.
A starving animal will always feed.
And I had nothing.
He ate parts of me.

I didn't let him leave.
I cut the dog apart.
And ate him.


I felt alive.

I feel her on my skin
Her eyes piercing my walls
Her talons scratching my wrists
Her lips caressing my neck
Her arm is wrapped around me
Her hair strangles me
Her fangs dig into my soul
Her desire engulfing me
Her urges rising inside me
I am hulled in her sweet bliss
Her scent fills my nostrils
As I ******* blood
And embrace the void I created.

And she
Leaves me alone.
Only to return
Tomorrow

As I glare into the sky,
Thousand lights shine down on me,
Thousand eyes to pierce my veil,
Thousand minds to know my tale.

I crave your eyes to look at me,
The eyes you placed on sun and moon,
To fear my deeds, to fear my hunt,
To **** all children you have shunned.

I want you, God, to watch me close,
Through wafts of mist, through wafts of blood,
To memorize the blade that cut
Through skins and organs of your loves.

Before you come, before you close
in on me the one who cursed
all of your sheep
all of their hope
i want to see your face once more
the mask you wear in minds of priests
shatter the lies show me the beast
you truly are.

i want you to KNEEL
come show me god the FEAR you feel
come show the god that LIED to us
the one who neglects war and LUST

WHERE ARE YOU TODAY
COME HERE AND PLAY

             with
                      ME

and TRY TO STOP ME
stop me!
or i will end this child that prays
to. a. false. god. WHO ONLY SWAYS
BUT DOES NOTHING BUT WATCH ME WAIL
IN PAIN AS I BREAK DOWN AND FAIL
i'll carve my name into his back
and shove the blade into his head
he'll scream and call me monster
till. he. bleeds. out.
but i know
the only monster is

      Y
                 O
                             U



die

I once had a great friend in my childhood years
Back when my world was two blocks wide
A wise owl, hulled in a cloak of gray feathers
Tainted innocence that once shone like snow.

One day, she called me to meet her again,
But all that I could find was a dying bird,
A being closer to death than life itself.
A friend that had only one last wish.

To share her conscience.
To preserve her knowledge.

I foolishly accepted her humble request,
Fully aware of the consequences it brought,
Foolishly waiting to carry her learnings in me,
But shocked to received far more than knowledge.

Realization.

Realization is a funny thing.
For some, it is power or fulfillment.
But if ignorance is bliss,
Then I have been cursed.

I never played much before,
Until I was given a blade,
Playing the knife game every day,
To feel the cool edge inside my skin.
It was
Exhilarating.

Like the sound of breaking bones,
Noise that invades my mind,
Like a broken record,
Screaming out its elegy.

I have been smothered.
Between the weight of living
And the weight of realization.

Realization is not a destination.
Realization is the end.
And beyond that
There's no beginning.