awe shucks
I love your eyes

awe shucks
your hands are beautiful

awe shucks
you make me dance

awe shucks
I get butterflies

awe shucks
your voice sends chills all over

awe shucks
your kisses make me weak in the knees

awe shucks
you are mine :)

We all have the power.
We all have a say.
If we just stand up.
Stop all the *******,
and just stand up!

Yeah, it's just sad is all.
So much we can do.
So much we have a say in.
To ******* change.
But everyone loves their some-what comfortable lives.
To take that wonderful chance.
We all have the power.
Every single one of us.
YES, YOU!

So yes it's sad.
We will probably destroy ourselves.
Too late?
Who ******* knows...

my heart skips
the sun moves north
I run to the hills
the clouds follow

I hear a voice
calling me
calling me
whispers of love
calling me
calling me

feeling light
hearts racing
rocks skipping
dawn coming

I hear his voice
calling me
calling me over
and over
whispers of love
calling me
over and over
calling..

sunsets
over the hills
clouds like your lips
whispering over
and over

calling me
I hear the voice
calling me
again and again
calling me
calling...

I run away... ?

Can we pretend that I'm amazing
instead of what we both know

I hurt us
for that I apologize, my love
will we be okay?

I miss everything about you
I can't believe you still want me
or if you really do?

can we pretend that I am perfect
instead of what we both know

I hurt you
I can't take that back
as much as I try
it will always be there

I miss everything about you
the little things mean the most
I can't believe you still want me
or if you really do?

can we pretend that I'm amazing
instead of what we both know

I hurt myself
for that, I am glad.

stretching out in a frown
can you feel the clowns?
coming forth
to collect
all your happy smiles

can you feel them
taking away your strength
making your sparkles dull
can you feel the clowns?
running down on you

run away my love
don't ever look back
don't let them get close
let the clowns stay sad
and run to the purple
where the hiccups are

can you feel them
taking away your light
can you
feel...
the clowns?

they are ready to collect...

I am scared.
I cheated on life.
on my life.
on my life.
I cheated and went to hell.
I lied.
I hate myself.

Clean slate.
It didn't happen.
I didn't cheat on life.
on my life.
on my life.
It was all a dream.
It didn't happen.
I smile.
I laugh.
I love myself.

Everything just works out for itself.
I am me, and always will be.
Smile, and live your life.
Be happy.
Smile.
Smile.

I SAID SMILE! :)

feeling thrilled
EXHILARATED
like everything is a breath of fresh air
and the wind pushed through your soul
being born all over again
your first tooth falling out
a day of pure bliss
creamy goodness of love
I have no idea what I am writing
make my space to be liquid
to swim forever in time
lose your time
just keep swimming
and swimming, and swimming
and
SPLASH!

Make the wind blow
Till the end of time
I will love you
I promise you this
I will wait for you
Promise to wait for me
Please, dont float away
Just make the wind blow for me
And you will save me from myself
Forever and Always
Till the end of time
I will love you
Please, don't float away
Make the wind blow
And you will save me from myself
Always and Forever

I wake up with your eyes
your hands feeling soft

a rainbow shining
through the open window
the window of a new morning

a day to start so bright
so fresh and open
like a wound
not ready to heal
but so ready for love

ready to be
to feel
to
be
with
you

till the night never comes
and the moon stays up
and
the stars speak
their love
of
the sky

Stars in the sky
the moon lights the way
the shadows fight to stay hidden
I walk slowly
no one left, but me
the wind catches my breath
as i reach the edge
the waves splash in anger
or maybe it's sadness?
an eagle flies above
is it mocking me?
one last look around
i take my final breath
and i float to the sea
it carries me gently
hushing me to sleep
my life flashes
and it's like i wasn't gone :)

Burst of wallowing winds
howling nights
sleepless days
a figure
in the distance
so whole
so fresh
a shadow of guilt
with no strings
it all
eats at my heart
taking little bites
until
there is nothing left
but a shell
of wind and tears

what would you do if i disappeared?
would you cry?
laugh?
be angry?
would you even notice?
the sun doesn't shine anymore
why should I?
it wouldn't matter if I left
there's no spark in life
no light
no star
there's nothing anymore
why am I still standing here?
waiting for..
waiting for what?
a miracle?
a window to open?
what would you do if I disappeared?
nothing
because its just a hoax
its nothing to be serious about
nothing to worry your little heart about
because I am never coming home
everything's too sad
too lost..
it's a void
of nothing.

the sun sets
the moon will rise
the dark creeps up
silence

everyone sleeps
they dream
of better places
and
smiling faces

Hush baby
and don't you cry
I won't leave you
till I die

the sun starts to rise
the moon slips away
light moves in
laughter

I love your hands
oh baby,
they make me smile.

soft moments, sparks fly,
giggles, tears, time is never wasted.

I get a little dizzy sometimes,
mind-blowing sun showers.

double rainbows,
stars in our eyes.

I need your touch,
Oh Baby, You're mine.

:)

I will always believe in wonderland
endless clouds
rain pouring in buckets of green
sun shining till the purple fades to pink
the blue grass always changing
light to dark hues

I will always believe in Hell
endless sorrow
rain pouring with hate, grey and bleak
the sun never shining, only darkness
the ground only dirt
shadows creeping in and out

BUT
I Will
ALWAYS
Believe in Wonderland
my love always given
my hate as well as my sadness
expressed in buckets of tears
and bouts of laughter

Always believe in Wonderland...

a flame
melted gold
an angel
sweet as sugar
above us all

an explosion
orange spark
lights so perfect
the dark, a void

practice makes perfect
I have practiced the art of making everything impossible for myself
I have successfully made my life a living hell for myself, and for God only knows how many others
I have deep regret for many things that have happened in my short life
It will just get worse
practice makes perfect

the tape presses against her mouth
she wonders why she can't speak

tears melt her eyes
she ponders why she can't see

too much speaking and trying to understand
she wonders why she can no longer hear

i am so alone.
everything seems so out of reach.
im lost.
you can never find me.
it happened so fast.
i never saw it coming.
always looking for comfort.
do i even know what that means?
im lost.
everything's bottled up inside.
if i take it out on you, im sorry.
will it be like this forever?
or will i find that "perfect" somebody.
i feel like im insane.
always alone with my thoughts.
i need someone to share these things with.
i need someone who will care.
i need someone who will love me for me.
everything feels so cold.
fragile and in pieces.
im messed up.
who would want this?
i wouldn't.
unstable and insecure.
speaking my own mind.
even if it's not wanted.
will i be strong?
can i stand it?
or will i crumble down alone?
i wish i knew.
it would save a lot of grief.
then i wouldn't have to guess.
i wouldn't have to cry.
i wouldn't have to punish myself.
i wouldn't be so out of control.
and i wouldn't be so scared.
the things just pile on.
no warning signs or flashing lights.
BOOM, and its just there!
i have lost what little control i have.
will i ever get that back?
or will i wither and die?
alone and afraid.

its a road
going on forever
the yellow lines guiding you
the white are the boundaries
cross them?

It's dark, purple dark
your alone
freezing
you have to keep going
rough but capable

when  the light comes
relief
tears of joy
you have found it
the angel of life

its a road of life
goes on and on
yellow angels are guiding you
white demons taunt
rough but capable

blue waves
sorta; kinda,
a little bit shaky

pink oceans
sorta; kinda,
a little bit crazy

green moons
sorta; kinda,
a little bit fun

purple people
sorta; kinda,
a little bit strange

just stay awhile
let me hold your hand
breathe in your scent
feel your touch
surrender sweet lover
surrender my friend
just stay awhile
even if it's just
to hold my hand for a bit
to tell me your here
at least for today
and maybe for tomorrow
just stay awhile
just stay...

lives are lost
while more are born
rainbows appear
and
lights explode
the air is sweet
and
angels fly all around
birds sing
and
the grass is green
while
the trees all speak
my fantasy will come alive
and
my death shall be as sweet as
honey.

fingers sway
feeling a rainbow of sorts
static pressure
and a wave off the ocean
you run from the spray
the sand pushes against your toes
hands clasped
and your fingers sway
melted
golden touch
as the sun sets on your back
the stars form in your eyes
you walk home
feeling more alive then ever before

The mind is like rough waves
with barely any breaks in the wind
constent and unforgiving
but with sunshine
and love
hate and sadness
anger
with rain and wind
moving in and out
eventually that wave will be calm
it will end
it will die
gone
would the other waves notice
that one wave has left
no
they will continue
with the sunshine
and love
hate and sadness
anger

♥
you're our sunshine, Sean
we miss your smile
and your amazing laugh
you kept us on our toes
laughing
and good times
always moving
and having fun
you're our sunshine, Sean
amazing and unforgettable
never to be forgotten
never far from our thoughts
and always with a place in our hearts
you're our sunshine, Sean
the one to make us happy when we were sad
the one to help us when we needed it
and the one to listen when we spoke
you are always there
you're our sunshine, Sean
we miss you and we love you
♥

bees start to buzz
the song of a new season
not a cloud in the sky
not a fool around to see
that you are dancing
in the breeze
to the song of the bees

the moon breaks out
and shines a way to your heart
the frost caressing our touch
the leaves of autumn blowing by
the heat of the sun
making it hard to breathe

but still
the bees will buzz
their song of joy
with the blue blue sky
and with no fools to see
that you are dancing
in the breeze
to the song of the bees

a breeze of hands
together like paste
spark of eyes meeting
under the sky
the stars approve
true honesty, true hearts
a soul with a soul
breathe in the butterflies
while angels sing
the lullaby of soft kisses

i am alone
falling to pieces
no one to catch me when i fall
no one to see me as i am
no one to be there for me
no one to ask if i was okay
my actions judged
my thoughts confused
i stand on my own two feet
with more baggage then is needed
ready to fall
emotionally unstable
a girl who loves
a girl who feels
a girl with emotions
never understood
free
what good is that?
when you have no one
broken and used up
sad and frustrated
crying on the inside
no one can see
no one wants to
she has her head up high
but she's still dying
ignoring it
and pushing people away
it's all she's good at
safer, more secure
she wants to fly
to go away
far far away
to a better place
a place of peace
unknown
i am alone
forever and always

I sit to think about it all
Eyes wide open, ready to fall
At any time, ready to give up
Almost gone completely
Slowly fading, smaller and smaller
The world i gave up on
People who gave up on me
I sit to think about it all
And i wonder,
With my eyes wide open
Who gave up on who?
Was it me?
Or them?
Will i ever truly know?
So, i sit back, and wonder
Will i make it?

spirals
energy found
freedom
you make it what it is

lines
energy lost
chained
you make it what it is

Tiny special sparks of life
footprints in the sand
waves and waves of swaying butterflies
dancing daisies
singing bees
the light in your eyes
I live for that

Sweet kisses late at night
you touch my lips
soft caresses
miniature goosebumps
the love in your eyes
I live for that

Silly gestures
making faces,
and poking fun
jokes, the odd quirky dance
the laughter in your eyes
I live for that

These days,
I live for that,
the passion,
the sparkle,
the enjoyment for life;
in your eyes.

you have always thought I was strong
tough, in my right mind
the clouds fluffy
the sun shining
stars that sparkle
I am the weakling

you have always thought I was funny
hilarious
ducks flying
gaters with hats
pink seas
I am the serious

you have always thought I would be there
I am home, always
cleaning, cooking
watching TV
I left a long time ago

I thought...
You always think but never know...