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"reassure" poems
Some day, if you are lucky, you’ll return from a thunderous journey trailing snake scales, wing fragments and the musk of Earth and moon. Eyes will examine you for signs of damage, or change and you, too, will wonder if your skin shows traces of fur, or leaves, if thrushes have built a nest of your hair, if Andromeda burns from your eyes. Do not be surprised by prickly questions from those who barely inhabit their own fleeting lives, who barely taste their own possibility, who barely dream. If your hands are empty, treasureless, if your toes have not grown claws, if your obedient voice has not become a wild cry, a howl, you will reassure them. We warned you, they might declare, there is nothing else, no point, no meaning, no mystery at all, just this frantic waiting to die. And yet, they tremble, mute, afraid you’ve returned without sweet elixir for unspeakable thirst, without a fluent dance or holy language to teach them, without a compass bearing to a forgotten border where no one crosses without weeping for the terrible beauty of galaxies and granite and bone. They tremble, hoping your lips hold a secret, that the song your body now sings will redeem them, yet they fear your secret is dangerous, shattering, and once it flies from your astonished mouth, they-like you-must disintegrate before unfolding tremulous wings.
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Apr 19, 2016
Apr 19, 2016 at 10:37 AM UTC
The return by Geneen Marie Haugen
As much as you try to reassure my mind keeps reeling With thoughts, sometimes obscure *One can not always help feeling insecure*
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Apr 6, 2016
Apr 6, 2016 at 5:35 PM UTC
~ Insecure ~
Day in, day out on the mind All comes down to competition Result of years of preparation. In those seconds of restlessness When the body can take no more Dream of a medal reassure. Will to succeed is eminent Breathes through each atom and cell To have what only a champion can smell. In the spirit of sportsmanship Fair play is to be endeavored The performance to be savored. Now is everything you pursued Aspiring in the end To proudly sing the national anthem. A steep climb to that podium Be the best that you can be And have what only a winner can see.
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Jul 31, 2012
Jul 31, 2012 at 7:35 AM UTC
Only a champion
How I love to sit beneath you and let your gentle, slender branches surround and protect me. Like a loving touch, your beautiful green boughs reach out to reassure me, I am not alone.
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Apr 28, 2014
Apr 28, 2014 at 11:04 AM UTC
Willow
“You are not an artist. You are not an artist.”         What photos must I shoot         How many cigarettes must I smoke It is scary, but - I want to embody the things which destroy minds Summer vibes feel like radiation Use this alcohol to eradicate The proposition - that I will be ‘okay’ My phone is on airplane mode My ambition is floating - as a feather might - Down to the depths I cannot finish my own sentences Bury my expectation with my religion         And it’s funny         Because I have resolved my mind to avoid romantic         confrontation         But, alas - I do day-dream         Of a girl’s face & hair - for it has appeared in my dreams four         times         And I awake to Deja-Vu as her face appears in conscious         frames So… I can imagine & I can see, but - they have become one in the same Could not fantasize asking Your hand in mine Oh how I wish to cry To sob in any light so long as you are in sight Someone to reassure me, that - yes “There is an end to the night.” But I cannot. I suppress it in drives. In music videos. In writing. In self-speaking when I have only me to keep company. Kick me off the team. I do not know what I need. If I could lead, as I once did. But I have left concern in the refrigerator With empty bottles & cans Maybe I will return tomorrow to salvage the cents of my malleable integrity   Won’t you reliquinish me of it ? For I have sipped the poison of honesty Regretfully it tastes like honey Lustful - Fleeting - Sugary - Intoxicating
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Jul 20, 2018
Jul 20, 2018 at 12:38 AM UTC
A Glimpse of My Motivation(s)
“You are not an artist. You are not an artist.”         What photos must I shoot         How many cigarettes must I smoke It is scary, but - I want to embody the things which destroy minds Summer vibes feel like radiation Use this alcohol to eradicate The proposition - that I will be ‘okay’ My phone is on airplane mode My ambition is floating - as a feather might - Down to the depths I cannot finish my own sentences Bury my expectation with my religion         And it’s funny         Because I have resolved my mind to avoid romantic         confrontation         But, alas - I do day-dream         Of a girl’s face & hair - for it has appeared in my dreams four         times         And I awake to Deja-Vu as her face appears in conscious         frames So… I can imagine & I can see, but - they have become one in the same Could not fantasize asking Your hand in mine Oh how I wish to cry To sob in any light so long as you are in sight Someone to reassure me, that - yes “There is an end to the night.” But I cannot. I suppress it in drives. In music videos. In writing. In self-speaking when I have only me to keep company. Kick me off the team. I do not know what I need. If I could lead, as I once did. But I have left concern in the refrigerator With empty bottles & cans Maybe I will return tomorrow to salvage the cents of my malleable integrity   Won’t you reliquinish me of it ? For I have sipped the poison of honesty Regretfully it tastes like honey Lustful - Fleeting - Sugary - Intoxicating
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40
She strolled down a winding pathway, admiring the brightly colored roses, listening to the loud chirping of the birds As she walked,she hummed a tune of joy and followed the path marking on a map, just to reassure herself that she was heading in the right direction Around a turn o the left she went, then back to the right, as her pace sped with every step But then the beautiful path that she'd been following for so long fell into a babbling creek, only to continue on the other side Had she, excited for her long journey, mistaked this path with the one she wished to take? "No," she decided, for she checked the path a million times before beginning, and she was positive she had journeyed on the correct one Should she give up on her journey, only to turn around and go home? "No," she told herself, for how could she live with herself of she gave up on her dream? But how will she, small and dainty, cross the sputtering creek that lays before her? She gazed at the creek in front of her, considering walking alongside it until she reached a spot where she could walk across "No," she determined, for there was no way of knowing whether there'd be a break in the flood of water, and even if there was, she'd be lost in the forest, continuously searching for the path She glanced from left to right, searching for something to aid her in crossing the creek To the left of the path, she noticed flat stones, the exact size of her foot "Yes!' she exclaimed, as she sets them in the creek and skipped across them She was back on her way, strolling down the pathway, headed towards her dreams.
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Jan 6, 2016
Jan 6, 2016 at 1:49 PM UTC
Chasing Dreams
She strolled down a winding pathway, admiring the brightly colored roses, listening to the loud chirping of the birds As she walked,she hummed a tune of joy and followed the path marking on a map, just to reassure herself that she was heading in the right direction Around a turn o the left she went, then back to the right, as her pace sped with every step But then the beautiful path that she'd been following for so long fell into a babbling creek, only to continue on the other side Had she, excited for her long journey, mistaked this path with the one she wished to take? "No," she decided, for she checked the path a million times before beginning, and she was positive she had journeyed on the correct one Should she give up on her journey, only to turn around and go home? "No," she told herself, for how could she live with herself of she gave up on her dream? But how will she, small and dainty, cross the sputtering creek that lays before her? She gazed at the creek in front of her, considering walking alongside it until she reached a spot where she could walk across "No," she determined, for there was no way of knowing whether there'd be a break in the flood of water, and even if there was, she'd be lost in the forest, continuously searching for the path She glanced from left to right, searching for something to aid her in crossing the creek To the left of the path, she noticed flat stones, the exact size of her foot "Yes!' she exclaimed, as she sets them in the creek and skipped across them She was back on her way, strolling down the pathway, headed towards her dreams.
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15
It's very late in the evening sun is going down night is young Among the crowd I see you watching the southern eclipse Pour out your heart to me Secure all that you need reassure for today Temperature is hot Southern eclipse I open my mind to see what I find Among the crowd I see you It's you who I want I've roamed the world looking for you You have cleared my mind I pour out my love for you, for you Ashore I'm waiting for you southern eclipse southern eclipse I can face another day because of you your embrace is warm No one can take your place Southern eclipse,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
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Aug 1, 2017
Aug 1, 2017 at 4:05 PM UTC
Southern Eclipse
XXIV Let the world’s sharpness, like a clasping knife, Shut in upon itself and do no harm In this close hand of Love, now soft and warm, And let us hear no sound of human strife After the click of the shutting. Life to life— I lean upon thee, Dear, without alarm, And feel as safe as guarded by a charm Against the stab of worldlings, who if rife Are weak to injure. Very whitely still The lilies of our lives may reassure Their blossoms from their roots, accessible Alone to heavenly dews that drop not fewer, Growing straight, out of man’s reach, on the hill. God only, who made us rich, can make us poor.
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7.2k
Sonnet 24 - Let The World’s Sharpness, Like A Clasping Knife
We all bear scars in one way or other. Some from loving someone too deeply and some others from losing someone or something that you cared too much for. Some scars are intentional while some others exist for stupid silly reasons. Some we are but some we are not so proud of. I have scars all over my body. All over my mind and all over my soul. I have scars on my brain due to over thinking and over analyzing incidents that haven’t even happened yet. I have scars on my eyes for shutting it more often, for being blind to things that should’ve been taken care of. I have scars on my nose from all those endless snobs and sniffles from my horrifying past relationships. I have scars on my mouth from speaking the truth, only the truth and nothing but the truth. I have scars on my neck from getting choked up on false love and fake proposals. I have scars on my shoulders from lifting up responsibilities that I was accustomed to from an early age. I have scars on my hands from holding onto things that weren’t supposed to be mine from the very start. I have scars on my chest from my ice cold heart that has been stomped over and over multiple times. I have scars on my lungs from the “occasional” stress buster cigarettes that I am addicted to every now and then. I have scars on my stomach from one too many butterflies that flew when we first met. I have scars on my legs from running, miles away from people and that place I used to call home. I have scars on my skin from the many tattoos I got done that helps me reassure my self-worth. I have scars on my soul from trying hard to pull myself together, calm me down and compose myself through the rampant storm that’s been raging in my life. I have all these scars. All of them. And they don’t scare me now even though they hurt like hell, at times. They’ve become a part of me and looking back, they are just reminders of who I was, what I have been through my life and the person it has made me become. They don’t scare me anymore because they define who I am now. A survivor.
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Mar 10, 2018
Mar 10, 2018 at 2:04 AM UTC
Scarred for Life
We all bear scars in one way or other. Some from loving someone too deeply and some others from losing someone or something that you cared too much for. Some scars are intentional while some others exist for stupid silly reasons. Some we are but some we are not so proud of. I have scars all over my body. All over my mind and all over my soul. I have scars on my brain due to over thinking and over analyzing incidents that haven’t even happened yet. I have scars on my eyes for shutting it more often, for being blind to things that should’ve been taken care of. I have scars on my nose from all those endless snobs and sniffles from my horrifying past relationships. I have scars on my mouth from speaking the truth, only the truth and nothing but the truth. I have scars on my neck from getting choked up on false love and fake proposals. I have scars on my shoulders from lifting up responsibilities that I was accustomed to from an early age. I have scars on my hands from holding onto things that weren’t supposed to be mine from the very start. I have scars on my chest from my ice cold heart that has been stomped over and over multiple times. I have scars on my lungs from the “occasional” stress buster cigarettes that I am addicted to every now and then. I have scars on my stomach from one too many butterflies that flew when we first met. I have scars on my legs from running, miles away from people and that place I used to call home. I have scars on my skin from the many tattoos I got done that helps me reassure my self-worth. I have scars on my soul from trying hard to pull myself together, calm me down and compose myself through the rampant storm that’s been raging in my life. I have all these scars. All of them. And they don’t scare me now even though they hurt like hell, at times. They’ve become a part of me and looking back, they are just reminders of who I was, what I have been through my life and the person it has made me become. They don’t scare me anymore because they define who I am now. A survivor.
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24
The perfectionist loves to hear his voice, He is the respected critic inside, He is the learned one, The educated and the educator. A beautiful constructor, The finishing touch To the artist's hand. The voice is always a partner, He will always be there to help The artist, comfort is taken in his ability. The artist needn't forget, There are many voices on the side, Awaiting for their time to speak, Each one has its time, All varying in their patience and duration. The artist sees what he hasn't before: The voice of support; the voice of love; the voice of decision; and the voice of passion. There is always time to contemplate his flaws And he wants to reassure himself: Perfection is not a demand, but a quest, One of beauty and one of joy. Perfection is the beauty in imperfection. The pursuit of achievement is one to relish, it is not to be rushed or Ceased, it is a running walk, a walking run, a sitting stand, a moving still. It is every step he has made. The artist looks behind and sees His effort, he is proud to have experienced His triumphs and his trauma The voice of comfort will be there all the way, She is a gentle quieter spirit that deserves as much an ear. When all voices have calmed and subsided, Her tenderness remains. I remind the artist of his friends, I remind him that the critical voice is the voice of nature, The physical laws unchanged. He is the driving force to stasis and movement in the age worry and indecision. "Do not be overwhelmed" I say to the artist, You are one of many. You are with friends. The voice of change encourages the artist to evolve and to smile, The voice of happiness allows peaceful living and awareness. The tiger belongs to nature, not to be feared, but to be respected and understood. Do not despair, do not relinquish hope, Hope is the shining beacon in a world of anguish. Hope is the angel shining her torch ever so bright. Hope is the window that allows pain and suffering to see the light of day , Hope allows oneness. The artist moves his brush: an effortless stroke, A flicker of joy, A tear in his eye. He once was old, Now is young. He learns to enjoy The work he has done, He can now enjoy the work he does, He is enjoying the work he is doing. He enjoys his life. The state of mind, it is a fickle hatchling. Able to be pursued and persuaded, also able to be liberated. The artist is free, His thoughts can pass, His fear will subside, His body can move, His heart will follow And the mind will allow. Spirit be set free, Bird do fly, Artist do paint, You, You are. Peace within oneself is peace with others. The artist is brave, he is a soul that stands tall in the face of adversity, He is a sleepless enigma in his room at night, He is the passionate one, The artist and his love affair with the critic outshines his charisma, The love for the sophisticated darkness, His love for the melodrama, His quest for knowledge, Perhaps the only knowledge is Ignorance. Blissful unawareness.
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Jun 15, 2016
Jun 15, 2016 at 11:20 AM UTC
Internal outfit, worn conciousness
The perfectionist loves to hear his voice, He is the respected critic inside, He is the learned one, The educated and the educator. A beautiful constructor, The finishing touch To the artist's hand. The voice is always a partner, He will always be there to help The artist, comfort is taken in his ability. The artist needn't forget, There are many voices on the side, Awaiting for their time to speak, Each one has its time, All varying in their patience and duration. The artist sees what he hasn't before: The voice of support; the voice of love; the voice of decision; and the voice of passion. There is always time to contemplate his flaws And he wants to reassure himself: Perfection is not a demand, but a quest, One of beauty and one of joy. Perfection is the beauty in imperfection. The pursuit of achievement is one to relish, it is not to be rushed or Ceased, it is a running walk, a walking run, a sitting stand, a moving still. It is every step he has made. The artist looks behind and sees His effort, he is proud to have experienced His triumphs and his trauma The voice of comfort will be there all the way, She is a gentle quieter spirit that deserves as much an ear. When all voices have calmed and subsided, Her tenderness remains. I remind the artist of his friends, I remind him that the critical voice is the voice of nature, The physical laws unchanged. He is the driving force to stasis and movement in the age worry and indecision. "Do not be overwhelmed" I say to the artist, You are one of many. You are with friends. The voice of change encourages the artist to evolve and to smile, The voice of happiness allows peaceful living and awareness. The tiger belongs to nature, not to be feared, but to be respected and understood. Do not despair, do not relinquish hope, Hope is the shining beacon in a world of anguish. Hope is the angel shining her torch ever so bright. Hope is the window that allows pain and suffering to see the light of day , Hope allows oneness. The artist moves his brush: an effortless stroke, A flicker of joy, A tear in his eye. He once was old, Now is young. He learns to enjoy The work he has done, He can now enjoy the work he does, He is enjoying the work he is doing. He enjoys his life. The state of mind, it is a fickle hatchling. Able to be pursued and persuaded, also able to be liberated. The artist is free, His thoughts can pass, His fear will subside, His body can move, His heart will follow And the mind will allow. Spirit be set free, Bird do fly, Artist do paint, You, You are. Peace within oneself is peace with others. The artist is brave, he is a soul that stands tall in the face of adversity, He is a sleepless enigma in his room at night, He is the passionate one, The artist and his love affair with the critic outshines his charisma, The love for the sophisticated darkness, His love for the melodrama, His quest for knowledge, Perhaps the only knowledge is Ignorance. Blissful unawareness.
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84
For a while we've been friends. As time gradually went by, We have grown closer to each other, Yet I still have my doubts. For I still fear you don't trust me, Or possibly secretly don't like me. You always reassure me And always cause me to smile. As time goes by, I feel that what I do isn't enough. I feel that as we continue on; I tend to fail at what I do. I still feel I have much to prove And I must give my all. In order to prove my loyalty, I have to prove myself everyday.
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Apr 26, 2012
Apr 26, 2012 at 1:33 AM UTC
Loyalty
I feel the humid emotion in our room This room where feelings are felt and magic happens between you and I You, sitting on the edge of our bed..motionless as the air itself.. Your pale colored eyes looking hungrily all over me..craving desire.. I know you want me.. Your layered jet black hair falling over your face in a roughed up lust.. I , sitting across from you on the ground These old cherry glazed wooden floors that are so familiar to us Sitting half undressed,  motionless My hair in a mess, like one of those models posing in a vogue magazine Desperately waiting for something to spark between this still nature My eyes looking you up.. and down … I want you… I crave your touch That euphoric rush you give me when your skin meets mine.. I want to feel your warmth up against my body A feeling I longed to feel for so long Sometimes I wondered if love really exists? Sitting alone, envisioning, and always thinking of you Is love just a movie? It starts, and sadly ends When I see you here in front of me, I deeply reflect. I think no, never. You are the definition of love You are my beautiful distraction The way your eyes lock on mine, they paralyze me, our gaze is cemented I wonder if you feel the same about me The emotions rush through my body as I passionately look at your perfection I the butterfly, and you the lion, such strong complexities to obtain. I leisurely rise and walk towards you following your desirable gaze I get close to your body and touch your gentle face, you let me get into your lap. You make me fear, you I touch you to reassure this is real The love I have wanted for so long. I kiss your soft skin, and bite your lips gently. Your warm body up against mine makes me melt in your arms. We share deep and passionate kisses that I wish would last forever. But forever is too long and I would be a corpse decaying in your arms. This memory will always linger I only want more from you. Take me somewhere we both know we want to go I whisper words into your ear softly Words that haven’t been spoken as long as I could remember. I shudder with life every time your touch embraces my soft skin. I close my eyes and the world spins into a maelstrom of pure bliss a beautiful desire.
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Apr 19, 2012
Apr 19, 2012 at 10:30 PM UTC
Beautiful Desire.
I feel the humid emotion in our room This room where feelings are felt and magic happens between you and I You, sitting on the edge of our bed..motionless as the air itself.. Your pale colored eyes looking hungrily all over me..craving desire.. I know you want me.. Your layered jet black hair falling over your face in a roughed up lust.. I , sitting across from you on the ground These old cherry glazed wooden floors that are so familiar to us Sitting half undressed,  motionless My hair in a mess, like one of those models posing in a vogue magazine Desperately waiting for something to spark between this still nature My eyes looking you up.. and down … I want you… I crave your touch That euphoric rush you give me when your skin meets mine.. I want to feel your warmth up against my body A feeling I longed to feel for so long Sometimes I wondered if love really exists? Sitting alone, envisioning, and always thinking of you Is love just a movie? It starts, and sadly ends When I see you here in front of me, I deeply reflect. I think no, never. You are the definition of love You are my beautiful distraction The way your eyes lock on mine, they paralyze me, our gaze is cemented I wonder if you feel the same about me The emotions rush through my body as I passionately look at your perfection I the butterfly, and you the lion, such strong complexities to obtain. I leisurely rise and walk towards you following your desirable gaze I get close to your body and touch your gentle face, you let me get into your lap. You make me fear, you I touch you to reassure this is real The love I have wanted for so long. I kiss your soft skin, and bite your lips gently. Your warm body up against mine makes me melt in your arms. We share deep and passionate kisses that I wish would last forever. But forever is too long and I would be a corpse decaying in your arms. This memory will always linger I only want more from you. Take me somewhere we both know we want to go I whisper words into your ear softly Words that haven’t been spoken as long as I could remember. I shudder with life every time your touch embraces my soft skin. I close my eyes and the world spins into a maelstrom of pure bliss a beautiful desire.
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48
I once was on an endless journey Of turning left and right, There was bramble all around me, only Nothing not alike. Though none were up above me I could not see the sky, All except my inner strength, I had been left alone to die. Deserted by the moon and stars, I was even without light, But desperate to be free again, I braved the endless night. Time escaped me, also I traveled a day, a week, a year, But my body never weakened, Nor hunger did I fear. Even if I neared the end I had no way to be sure, So, I promised myself it was close ahead, Just one more set of turns. But the exit never greeted me And disappointment, it grew strong I had broken so many promises, My credibility was gone. I could no longer reassure my mind, So I faced the truth instead, I prepared myself for eternity – And an endless path ahead.
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Jul 20, 2013
Jul 20, 2013 at 9:40 PM UTC
I Dreamt of Mazes
Housing thoughts that so often incite a sick sort of darkness, that may cause one to shy away so all these thoughts are for you that I write so you can walk amongst my dreams and view the decay feeling the need for you to see every corner of my mind and were you to decide to turn and run far from me you can before it is too late, lest to my darkness be confined this allows the ability to avoid all this that is my insanity riddled with debris There is of course a light within my darkness as well for every Yin there is a Yang or so I hear therefore on darkness I will not always dwell hopefully this can alleviate any fear and reassure that there also lies hope and love within my soul a lot of which by you is often times inspired basking in so much light, releasing me from despair's control it is these things about you I have always admired So please, take a stroll down the many paths my mind holds I will hope they are not too overwhelming as they begin to unfold
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Nov 13, 2012
Nov 13, 2012 at 4:49 PM UTC
Step Inside My Mind
⊙ *Luke 12:49 “I came to bring fire to the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled!”* This wasteland, desolate vegetable garden No crops will grow, no sun will shine No cool breeze to clean the air of the smell of decomposition Just dead things, the decay of man and dreams of hope Which my black boots stomp on I walk the ruin in silence I walk past a monster sleeping by a tree Turning, frowning The monster is me Its eyes are as red as judgement day As red as the faces of the condemed Those who stare at the 144 000, wondering if they are worthy As red as the blood ********** in this ancient garden This is a battleground Oozing with pain, pleasure, splendor and misery Even if Pythia already circled the loser's name in bright red Allowing the victors to trample holy ground underfoot Before they disappeared But me I stood here Feeling all feeling being drained out I walked past a monster weeping by a tree “Everything good must come to an end,” Mystery says Pursing her lips “And so must everything wicked But the memories Those which encircle their victim And slowly tighten like great snakes Suffocating their prey Those last forever And if those memories last forever Then how can one remain pure in heaven Without thinking about sin Temptation must surely creep in Poisoning the mind until it is consumed with the idea Who is pure anyway?” I know she is lying (Turning) But her words are surreal, slurred, seductive (Frowning) I look inside my heart to reassure myself (Turning) There is hope (Frowning) But there’s nothing there (And the monster is me) In the vegetable garden A ruin A wasteland I stand Not really existing ⊥ ⊣⊙⊢ ⊤
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Apr 30, 2019
Apr 30, 2019 at 2:07 AM UTC
In Judgement's Eye
⊙ *Luke 12:49 “I came to bring fire to the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled!”* This wasteland, desolate vegetable garden No crops will grow, no sun will shine No cool breeze to clean the air of the smell of decomposition Just dead things, the decay of man and dreams of hope Which my black boots stomp on I walk the ruin in silence I walk past a monster sleeping by a tree Turning, frowning The monster is me Its eyes are as red as judgement day As red as the faces of the condemed Those who stare at the 144 000, wondering if they are worthy As red as the blood ********** in this ancient garden This is a battleground Oozing with pain, pleasure, splendor and misery Even if Pythia already circled the loser's name in bright red Allowing the victors to trample holy ground underfoot Before they disappeared But me I stood here Feeling all feeling being drained out I walked past a monster weeping by a tree “Everything good must come to an end,” Mystery says Pursing her lips “And so must everything wicked But the memories Those which encircle their victim And slowly tighten like great snakes Suffocating their prey Those last forever And if those memories last forever Then how can one remain pure in heaven Without thinking about sin Temptation must surely creep in Poisoning the mind until it is consumed with the idea Who is pure anyway?” I know she is lying (Turning) But her words are surreal, slurred, seductive (Frowning) I look inside my heart to reassure myself (Turning) There is hope (Frowning) But there’s nothing there (And the monster is me) In the vegetable garden A ruin A wasteland I stand Not really existing ⊥ ⊣⊙⊢ ⊤
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59
2 steps forward 4 steps back All fun and games Till someone gets hurt Shall we play a game, With no return? Go places we've never been Who gives a **** if we don't make it? That's why we do it Test the limits Risk it all Just to see who would care Just to reassure ourselves That if we're gone They would send a prayer Let's go there Leave at the crack of dawn Gone That's what we'll be Forever Gone Wild Free Together You and I I hate you most Always together That's what we are They say it's an allusion All in your head They drive you crazy Until your dead That's were I'm headed And your coming with me Because if I'm the car Then you're the key So lets go to a new nowhere Start over until that **** gets to old And we'll keep going Just you and me My Demon
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Dec 7, 2013
Dec 7, 2013 at 3:21 AM UTC
My Demon
Teasing the beast Looking for a feast Hounds barking at our ears Vultures flying up ahead Circling a bald eagle's fresh corpse Compartmentalizing symptom after symptom To hide the great systematic sickness Labeling the suffering, outcome from desire We, wholeheartedly accepting being Appropriated, labeled, discarded As construing our own oppression and sadness Enduring the **** of our minds Being castrated of our consciousness Before we reap the products Of its bold liberation and grandness Its the belly of the beast And its hungry Insatiable, amoral entrails Hoping to salvage a feast From the casualties of d(e)moc(ratic) wars Hoping we feed our monstrous fear Thirsting for the greed Dripping off of accumulating wealths Impatiently waiting, we keep parceling out grudges Disfiguring our minds, our souls, and our bodies Its misanthropic nature lashes out without conscience Knowing we'll never realize we are masses Disappearing the individuals who realize their suffering Ensuring there's no collective opposition or action Trying to reassure we are weak Knowing at some point or another We all act mute, deaf, and blind when anyone experiences: Oppression Pain Silencing **** Hunger Fear Violence Repression Retaliation Discrimination Torture Negation Alienation All forms of mental, psychological, physical, and spiritual mutilation Fearing death more than fighting for necessary abolishment Preferring to live out our veiled miseries Endorsing their continuance Instead of risking our lives for everyone's liberation Always ensuring the feast of the beast By its very efforts trying to decree our very human nature Ingraining greed, fear, animosity, and weakness as if inherent of us All parts of its most damaging weapon: the seed of discord Its implantation, a socialized deep desire for self-preservation Sheep bleating painfully toward our ears Vultures flying up ahead Circling a bald eagle's fresh corpse Signifying the impending recapturing Of our true transformative desires
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May 4, 2013
May 4, 2013 at 11:30 PM UTC
Rescuing Our True Transformative Desires
Teasing the beast Looking for a feast Hounds barking at our ears Vultures flying up ahead Circling a bald eagle's fresh corpse Compartmentalizing symptom after symptom To hide the great systematic sickness Labeling the suffering, outcome from desire We, wholeheartedly accepting being Appropriated, labeled, discarded As construing our own oppression and sadness Enduring the **** of our minds Being castrated of our consciousness Before we reap the products Of its bold liberation and grandness Its the belly of the beast And its hungry Insatiable, amoral entrails Hoping to salvage a feast From the casualties of d(e)moc(ratic) wars Hoping we feed our monstrous fear Thirsting for the greed Dripping off of accumulating wealths Impatiently waiting, we keep parceling out grudges Disfiguring our minds, our souls, and our bodies Its misanthropic nature lashes out without conscience Knowing we'll never realize we are masses Disappearing the individuals who realize their suffering Ensuring there's no collective opposition or action Trying to reassure we are weak Knowing at some point or another We all act mute, deaf, and blind when anyone experiences: Oppression Pain Silencing **** Hunger Fear Violence Repression Retaliation Discrimination Torture Negation Alienation All forms of mental, psychological, physical, and spiritual mutilation Fearing death more than fighting for necessary abolishment Preferring to live out our veiled miseries Endorsing their continuance Instead of risking our lives for everyone's liberation Always ensuring the feast of the beast By its very efforts trying to decree our very human nature Ingraining greed, fear, animosity, and weakness as if inherent of us All parts of its most damaging weapon: the seed of discord Its implantation, a socialized deep desire for self-preservation Sheep bleating painfully toward our ears Vultures flying up ahead Circling a bald eagle's fresh corpse Signifying the impending recapturing Of our true transformative desires
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did it work? I give a useless tug on my skin, done to reassure me instead it reaffirms to me: I am, again, inconsolable. is the mask I wear today sealed on tight? too tight? does it hurt to pretend so much? does it seem clear to anyone else that there are loose ends I've yet to tend to? backdoors I've overlooked? transparencies?    can they see through me? I bare my teeth. canines, canines from the days of carnivores. am I that carnivore? in my genes I am. and in practice? inconsolable, uncontrollable barely a threat in her form. this question comes to me under many guises: an old man asking me: are you that of practice or are you that of genes? a professor lecturing: are you that of cultivated identity or that of inherited form? my concerned friends crying: who are you? is your mask anything like you? and then i wake. it's a terror turned nightly chorus. recurring nightmares, doctors offer. i admit i know the content of my dreams to be unfounded: in life there are no physical masks that do the jobs my terrors depict. no veil to hide the contours of each flawed personality, no mask to others, just me, weeping-in-the-bathroom, never-myself me and those attempted favours to be like one another i'll be like you so you'll like me i'll like you because i'm like you so the body charges on in this society like a mirror cross your left leg when she crosses her right, fold your arms when she's folded hers, raise your hand to say hello, raise your hand to say goodbye a kiss on the right cheek, a kiss on the left, one more on the left this is how you show love and a greeting all at once fold your arms over each other, this is sympathy, this is greeting, do you take comfort in this too? so you learn to speak with your arms, and you learn to speak with your legs, and you learn to speak with your face, and you learn to speak with your head. soon your eyes are apprentices of acquaintances, learning to borrow looks like library books, take on others' stories like they've read them end to end. so in the middle of this process you learn to effectively say: i see you, i hear you, i perceive you. and in these attempted favours, at the end of your night terrors, is the parrot that they want to see. the parrot that you argue, can't really be me.
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Aug 9, 2018
Aug 9, 2018 at 6:14 PM UTC
the anthropomorphism of people pleasing
did it work? I give a useless tug on my skin, done to reassure me instead it reaffirms to me: I am, again, inconsolable. is the mask I wear today sealed on tight? too tight? does it hurt to pretend so much? does it seem clear to anyone else that there are loose ends I've yet to tend to? backdoors I've overlooked? transparencies?    can they see through me? I bare my teeth. canines, canines from the days of carnivores. am I that carnivore? in my genes I am. and in practice? inconsolable, uncontrollable barely a threat in her form. this question comes to me under many guises: an old man asking me: are you that of practice or are you that of genes? a professor lecturing: are you that of cultivated identity or that of inherited form? my concerned friends crying: who are you? is your mask anything like you? and then i wake. it's a terror turned nightly chorus. recurring nightmares, doctors offer. i admit i know the content of my dreams to be unfounded: in life there are no physical masks that do the jobs my terrors depict. no veil to hide the contours of each flawed personality, no mask to others, just me, weeping-in-the-bathroom, never-myself me and those attempted favours to be like one another i'll be like you so you'll like me i'll like you because i'm like you so the body charges on in this society like a mirror cross your left leg when she crosses her right, fold your arms when she's folded hers, raise your hand to say hello, raise your hand to say goodbye a kiss on the right cheek, a kiss on the left, one more on the left this is how you show love and a greeting all at once fold your arms over each other, this is sympathy, this is greeting, do you take comfort in this too? so you learn to speak with your arms, and you learn to speak with your legs, and you learn to speak with your face, and you learn to speak with your head. soon your eyes are apprentices of acquaintances, learning to borrow looks like library books, take on others' stories like they've read them end to end. so in the middle of this process you learn to effectively say: i see you, i hear you, i perceive you. and in these attempted favours, at the end of your night terrors, is the parrot that they want to see. the parrot that you argue, can't really be me.
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probably because i keep putting you first, before everything else that i ever thought of before - these feelings of missing people before i love them too much haunt me everyday you don't understand, you still go home to the same people you laid next to on a changing table, have beers with people who learned to suckle on their thumbs around the same time as you the people i go home to i shook their hands as we both signed our 1-year lease and soon i'll shake their hands goodbye and good riddance i hold these ******* fears and horrifies and terrifies and tears in my chest, i can't afford to keep loving people and letting them go into the world without me at their side - i hate loving people and cutting these red strings that connect us, i love so deeply and i just want to see you succeed and give you flowers and kisses, and hold you in my arms when you feel the world crumbling down around you - i promise i can love, my love is a wicked one i just cant keep loving and breaking, loving and breaking when can i love and love and love and love without end with you you terrify me you're here and then you're gone and you try to reassure me that you're always always here but i can't trust it when you only come and peek into my life for 5 seconds at a time and then you're gone living your own, i'm so scared you'll love someone else and leave because i am so in love with you and loving and breaking with you will **** me it'll **** me let me **** my heart first before you try to do it yourself
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Apr 3, 2015
Apr 3, 2015 at 4:59 PM UTC
and you wonder why i feel so unappreciated it,
probably because i keep putting you first, before everything else that i ever thought of before - these feelings of missing people before i love them too much haunt me everyday you don't understand, you still go home to the same people you laid next to on a changing table, have beers with people who learned to suckle on their thumbs around the same time as you the people i go home to i shook their hands as we both signed our 1-year lease and soon i'll shake their hands goodbye and good riddance i hold these ******* fears and horrifies and terrifies and tears in my chest, i can't afford to keep loving people and letting them go into the world without me at their side - i hate loving people and cutting these red strings that connect us, i love so deeply and i just want to see you succeed and give you flowers and kisses, and hold you in my arms when you feel the world crumbling down around you - i promise i can love, my love is a wicked one i just cant keep loving and breaking, loving and breaking when can i love and love and love and love without end with you you terrify me you're here and then you're gone and you try to reassure me that you're always always here but i can't trust it when you only come and peek into my life for 5 seconds at a time and then you're gone living your own, i'm so scared you'll love someone else and leave because i am so in love with you and loving and breaking with you will **** me it'll **** me let me **** my heart first before you try to do it yourself
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My love, my lover, my life. Tall, beared, hued and mysterious. I realized he was mysterious since he only lives in the frontal lobe of my mind. There I anxiously wait for his kiss. Is it crazy to think that a bond so strong will ever exist? I sure hope he does! I am frantically in love with him. This man unknown who has not found me as of yet. I have seen glimpses of him, here and there. With long observation that never compare! I wait, again. Full of emotions. With tears, fears and deep long sighs. I reassure myself that my love, so simple, and true, is near.
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May 4, 2025
May 4, 2025 at 3:45 PM UTC
Repast For Love Never Known
Why don't I just throw it all in your face And see if I can escape this ******* place Use a diversion to escape Drive away listen to that old cassette tape Can't I get away for a little while The site of you is getting quite vial A get away sounds like a good thing A vacation is the best thing Before I set up this battle and war I need to know and reassure you of the score You lead by exactly one So its in your best interest to turn and run I will kick your ******* skull in I can guarantee the win I don't where to start or where to end Cause even know I don't know what is around the bend Can't I get away for a little while The site of you is getting quite vial A get away sounds like a good thing A vacation is the best thing I recall a time once ago Where you were an angel not a *** Back then we were together With hopes of it being forever Ha, when I think of that now I can see why it came crumbling down Oh! Oh! Oh! Can't I get away for awhile The site of you is getting quite vial A get away seems like a good thing A vacation is the best thing
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Dec 10, 2011
Dec 10, 2011 at 10:10 PM UTC
Vacation
It happens imperceptibly but you know it when it’s in full effect – Two’s company three’s crowd. It’s not anyone’s fault, not something anyone decides, just how it goes sometimes. Conversation becomes more and more personal, until it is clear: You are not supposed to be here. So you do what you are good at doing. You disappear. - See, disappearing? You have it down to a science. Talk less and less and then not at all. Stare off into space, perhaps fidget from time to time, make small movements to show that you have not quite turned to stone. Take a while to leave. It can’t be sudden - you wouldn’t want to draw attention to yourself. [It’s awkward for everyone involved.] Finally, when you think you just can’t bear it, get up to go to the bathroom and never come back. It’s easier than you think. - They will look for and address you eventually: *oh good night, are you okay, you’re so quiet, you should have said something, I’m sorry, sorry, sorry.* The usual. You will reassure them when the time comes, fold up your feelings into a little origami crane that you wish could just fly away. But for now you can sit safely in your invisibility. - You told your friend group earlier that sometimes you thought there was no point calling yourself gay because you just hated everyone. It makes everyone laugh, and even you find that you’re amused, but you don’t know if they heard the hurt, the bitterness, the honesty of that statement buried within your voice. - You watch the way your two friends (with benefits) are affectionate with each other, the way one puts her head in the other’s lap, the way they play with each other’s hair small kisses on small places, the way they do these things and see only each other, as if all of this is only obvious to them. It’s sweet. You try to rouse yourself into more feeling: jealousy, sadness, hopefulness, anything intense, but everything boils down to the same nothingness. This is simply another thing you can’t/won’t/don’t have [pick any verb, they’re all true]. - And this is what your life is: trying to find ways to make everything disappear. Feelings – gone. Desires – gone. Expectations – gone. Hopes – gone. Communication – gone. - And this is what your life is: Succeeding.
0
Mar 30, 2016
Mar 30, 2016 at 2:43 AM UTC
Dissociation
It happens imperceptibly but you know it when it’s in full effect – Two’s company three’s crowd. It’s not anyone’s fault, not something anyone decides, just how it goes sometimes. Conversation becomes more and more personal, until it is clear: You are not supposed to be here. So you do what you are good at doing. You disappear. - See, disappearing? You have it down to a science. Talk less and less and then not at all. Stare off into space, perhaps fidget from time to time, make small movements to show that you have not quite turned to stone. Take a while to leave. It can’t be sudden - you wouldn’t want to draw attention to yourself. [It’s awkward for everyone involved.] Finally, when you think you just can’t bear it, get up to go to the bathroom and never come back. It’s easier than you think. - They will look for and address you eventually: *oh good night, are you okay, you’re so quiet, you should have said something, I’m sorry, sorry, sorry.* The usual. You will reassure them when the time comes, fold up your feelings into a little origami crane that you wish could just fly away. But for now you can sit safely in your invisibility. - You told your friend group earlier that sometimes you thought there was no point calling yourself gay because you just hated everyone. It makes everyone laugh, and even you find that you’re amused, but you don’t know if they heard the hurt, the bitterness, the honesty of that statement buried within your voice. - You watch the way your two friends (with benefits) are affectionate with each other, the way one puts her head in the other’s lap, the way they play with each other’s hair small kisses on small places, the way they do these things and see only each other, as if all of this is only obvious to them. It’s sweet. You try to rouse yourself into more feeling: jealousy, sadness, hopefulness, anything intense, but everything boils down to the same nothingness. This is simply another thing you can’t/won’t/don’t have [pick any verb, they’re all true]. - And this is what your life is: trying to find ways to make everything disappear. Feelings – gone. Desires – gone. Expectations – gone. Hopes – gone. Communication – gone. - And this is what your life is: Succeeding.
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