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everything is all right now
it's okay
everything is the way it's supposed to be

go to sleep
you're good enough
close your eyes

close your eyes
take off your clothes
you're good enough

take off your clothes
i'm thinking of ending things
yesterday i woke up on the phone

buildings rearranged

all the scarecrows
and everything
everything's ending.
i don't know if this is good, i'd appreciate feedbacfjsdf;osdlyesterday i woke up on the phone listening to the radio eysteday i fell asleep in the pool witheiswek it all in its right place Confused Yet?

Sorry if this is difficult and esoteric, thats the pointi don't know if this is good, i'd appreciate feedbacfjsdf;osdlyesterday i woke up on the phone listening to the radio eysteday i fell asleep in the pool witheiswek it all in its right place Confused Yet?

Sorry if this is difficult and esoteric, thats the point. Things are just somewhat difficult and lonely, and it's hard to articulate it. nevertheless, i try.
I didn't know
I made for lackluster company
And I never realised
You might get on without me so easily
And I didn't know my problems
Were too much for you to take
But know I only have the walls
And I need to find some escape


I didn't mean
To treat you so unkind
Ain't it just like me
To not realise I'm so blind
I'd never want you
To feel alone in my presence
And if this is how friendship works
I supposed I've learned my lesson

Sooner or later one of us must know
That I really did try to get close to you
Sooner or later one of us must know
You're the one I really tried my hardest to get close to

I wish I'd known you felt
You spent a year on your own
Had I known that, I might not
Have to spend my whole life unknown
And if that seems dramatic
Cause surely I'll find someone again
Then I think you overestimate
My ability to make friends

Sooner or later one of us must know
That I really did try to get close to you
Sooner or later one of us must know
You're the one I really tried my hardest to get close to

But I was only trying
To do what you said
I didn't know our connection
Was only in my head
Somebody said you're happier
And I'm glad for you
But I wish you could tell me
Now what the **** do I do

Sooner or later one of us must know
That I really did try to get close to you
Sooner or later one of us must know
You're the one I really tried my hardest to get close to

And I don't blame you
So don't pity me and change your mind
I just want you to know
I never wanted to be unkind
And I just wish I knew
The last time I saw your home
Was the last time I'd ever see it
And the last time I wouldn't feel alone

Sooner or later one of us must know
That I really did try to get close to you
Sooner or later one of us must know
You're the one I really tried my hardest to get close to

I can't help but feel
Deep down you kinda lead me on
But I know that you
Didn't really do anything wrong
And of course I respect
Your feelings and decisions
But it still feels like my heart
Was ripped out with great precision

Sooner or later one of us must know
That I really did try to get close to you
Sooner or later one of us must know
You're the one I really tried my hardest to get close to

And now I can't identify
Any feelings anymore
Cause I've never engaged
In any friendship before
So when you said you
Still wanted to be my acquaintance
If that was some kind of joke
I wouldn't know how to take it
im pretty sure i just lost one of my closest friends today. ironic thing is, i only have one other friend, who is in a different country. ironic ironic thing is, i've never had a friend that close before. ha-ha. clearly i don't understand how this friendship thing works
English Jam Jun 2020
I thought you were an angel
You touched me like a pair of leaves
But you weren't no stranger
Lost in the big city

I'm an obvious razor
You looked like you wanted to kiss
I bicycle to silly love songs
Please don't be afraid of this
I want to hold your hand
Cause the sound of my impending doom
And the sound of your heartbeat
Makes for one hell of a tune

Ain't it funny how the clock on your wall
Counts down the hours to my life
I always feel so out of place
...

If melting clocks don't change your mind
Then I don't know but I ain't got time to find out
I gotta move, I gotta dance
Cause the beat goes on and on
If melting clocks don't change your mind
Then I don't know but I ain't got time to stay still
I gotta move, I gotta dance
Cause the beat goes on and on

Do you think God was careless when He
Cut my figure out of stone
Do you think that He meant to give me
Two arms and legs to flail alone
Ants roll me down the hill
They call me the tumbling dice
If I've thought about dying young once
Then I've thought about being alive twice

Once when I wanted to be you
Twice when you wanted to kiss me
A third time when I felt out of place
...

If melting clocks don't change your mind
Then I don't know but I ain't got time to stay still
I gotta move, I gotta dance
Cause the beat goes on and on
If melting clocks don't change your mind
Then I don't know but I ain't got time to find out
I gotta move, I gotta dance
Cause the beat goes on and on

The beat goes on
The beat goes on
The beat goes
Darling, you're the one I want to dance
English Jam Apr 2020
my hands tremble.
i am still an embryo.
i have the mouth of an old man.

a red eye sinks into the horizon, staring.
unflinching, i stare back.

my feet feel rubber as i walk
the soles may fall off
a face is disassembled in a very scientific manner

a hand, independent of its body, clutches a spear.
it is about to **** a fish.
the killing is not the point; the ability to **** is the point.
it is power and masculinity, picasso reminds us.
i wouldn't know. i haven't been born yet.

i crawl across the room
numbly,
i feel my way into the dark.

a crack in the sky appears, and a nightmare reaches down
it takes shape as a grinning soul.

it has no body.
maybe it's my body.
i am but the sum of my parts.
English Jam Dec 2019
A haiku haiku haiku
haiku haiku - hi
ha-ha it's a haiku hai-
haiku
English Jam Sep 2019
Four little pigs
Sleeping in a lemon tree
Just hanging around
Waiting for destiny
When I came home
They were scattered all about
Three were in the house
The fourth somewhere out

Gentle piggies, on the farm
Their bodies, so warm
Hanging by, feeling swell
Is it me? I can't tell

They were in the Sunday best
Looking so neat
But then again
They were just slabs of meat
I gave them all my love
They told me it was hate
Ungrateful little piggies
Perhaps they were victims of fate

Where'd they go, which way?
Did the bad wolf blow them away?
Mr Wolf, did they scream?
Did they taste like a dream?
The four little pigs are four children from Durban who were found murdered by their father on 3 September 2019. Three of them (aged four, six and ten) were found hanging in their homes, while the fourth (aged seventeen) was found hanging in a bush.

The full story can be found here: https://citizen.co.za/news/south-africa/crime/2174705/durban-father-arrested-for-hanging-of-four-children/amp/
English Jam Aug 2019
The pigeon, what a dull and beautiful bird
Living on the edge of the knife, unknowingly
Staring death in the face, daily
Threatened by man, beast and rapture
Does it know love, laughter or life?
Does it know fear, pain or strife?
Beautiful in its dullness
An object of fascination and detachment
Beauty is in the eye of the mundane

You smile idealistically
We talk like liberals and laugh like friends
Under lazy heat and ripe conversation
If only you could see the grey I could see
But then again, if I am the only one who can see it
I must be special

Dust and mud turn to fine red wine in your glass
Smooth surfaces and large mirrors to admire each other
Sunshine, nostalgia
And all pretty makeup
Words ebbing off your dry deadbeat tongue, so insatiable
A scene picturesque, idyllic
Boring

Enough of that jazz
Hey-oh, screeching viola's and Sanskrit texts
Urge me to prophecy
Our journey begins in a Kenyan airport
African night flight
Plane spiralling into a chasm
Until it crash lands in a dusty maroon desert
A barren wasteland
The locals grin a foolish grin
They want to eat me for dinner
(That's offensive, isn't it?)
(Well, if you think that's offensive, try this)
I'm a stormtrooper, I'm a ****
I can show you all the hate in the world
I have experienced hardships beyond belief
From my perfectly comfortable suburban dream
I have the window seat on every plane
And I use it to pretend to be lost in thought

Blitzkrieg hail pours in snarling squadrons
Down from the sky
Hand in pants, I play the fantasy in my head
The trick to this is that nothing is real
And nothing is personal
For if I could truly comprehend horror
Oh boy
I'm so glad ****'s aren't real
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