Hello Poetry
Submit your work and get some sparkles! Create free account
"finalize" poems
It’s 6:15pm. Peter, Anna, Sophy and I are studying in the common room of our suite. “We need to get serious,” Peter whispered, but there was no subject in the declaration, so I was left confused and uncommitted, “about getting serious,” he clarified. “I’m not sure I can get serious about a guy who doesn’t separate whites and darks in the laundry,” I say, gently. “No,” he said, shaking his head in brief vibration, “we need to get serious about DINNER.” “Oh!” I said, maybe a little too relieved. “Ha!” He chortled, “YOU overthink everything!” He said, nodding his head up and down to prove it was true. “And speaking of laundry,” he continued, seeing me start to open my mouth, “the other night YOU asked me if your pastel purple ******* should go with the whites or darks - so I must be an EXPERT!” I laughed at the idea of his laundry expertise, sailing in from out of the purple like that, it was haywire. “Well,” I said, becoming introspective, “I didn’t know you’d hold onto that question like a grudge,” I said, in quiet, wounded accusation, “from now ON, maybe you should stay as far away from my ******* as possible.” “What are you two grousing about NOW?” Anna asked, looking up from her computer. “You guys are like an old married couple.” “True THAT.” Sophie said, like a judge right before knocking her gavel to finalize a ruling. “We weren’t arguing!” I said, looking around confusedly. I looked at Peter, who was smiling broadly, “Were we?” “Nope,” he said, wrapping his arm around me in a bearhug, “we were flirting.”
0
Sep 22, 2022
Sep 22, 2022 at 2:43 PM UTC
pastel purple
It’s 6:15pm. Peter, Anna, Sophy and I are studying in the common room of our suite. “We need to get serious,” Peter whispered, but there was no subject in the declaration, so I was left confused and uncommitted, “about getting serious,” he clarified. “I’m not sure I can get serious about a guy who doesn’t separate whites and darks in the laundry,” I say, gently. “No,” he said, shaking his head in brief vibration, “we need to get serious about DINNER.” “Oh!” I said, maybe a little too relieved. “Ha!” He chortled, “YOU overthink everything!” He said, nodding his head up and down to prove it was true. “And speaking of laundry,” he continued, seeing me start to open my mouth, “the other night YOU asked me if your pastel purple ******* should go with the whites or darks - so I must be an EXPERT!” I laughed at the idea of his laundry expertise, sailing in from out of the purple like that, it was haywire. “Well,” I said, becoming introspective, “I didn’t know you’d hold onto that question like a grudge,” I said, in quiet, wounded accusation, “from now ON, maybe you should stay as far away from my ******* as possible.” “What are you two grousing about NOW?” Anna asked, looking up from her computer. “You guys are like an old married couple.” “True THAT.” Sophie said, like a judge right before knocking her gavel to finalize a ruling. “We weren’t arguing!” I said, looking around confusedly. I looked at Peter, who was smiling broadly, “Were we?” “Nope,” he said, wrapping his arm around me in a bearhug, “we were flirting.”
Continue reading...
11
artificial feelings stuffed in a room dangerous proximity could finalize doom deprivation brings about illogical thoughts then it happens, and my hearts in knots side effects may include waking in cold sweat followed by hot flashes of regret but it seems like whenever the icing's enticing, i can't help but take the cake.
0
Aug 28, 2014
Aug 28, 2014 at 9:39 PM UTC
Temptation
Broke Unable to finalize any purchase Checking For change in the last places that one searches Insufficient To the point I'm unable to ward off the throes of destitution Bankrupted By devaluing those who have not made restitution Insolvent To the point of having to fight off the urge to curse Disallowed by the prose that places value and give credit....to verse Denied Any credit accrued....maybe even unearned Reevaluation With no accounting for the time you SPENT Learning what you have learned Depreciation or Appreciation Cannot be quantified by the lack of someone.saying thanks Interest will eventually be of value Once accrued... but for now I must accept That I'm simply overdrawn at my memory banks Investment in my own value Will allow me growth In my own ... ......personal Checking account Helping me in balancing  the books Keeping me payed up and happy BY Always giving others their true valuation   So that ego doesnt become a currency That is subject to... such a devastating inflation
0
Jun 16, 2016
Jun 16, 2016 at 4:24 PM UTC
Accounting for...
I just left your house and counted the glowing, dotted lines that passed by all too eagerly The fluorescent paint reflects the lights back to me like the letter I passed to you which you so hastily returned A chipped away memory and a winter kiss only dreamt of finalize this draft of our suspenseful novella But I hear you have many of these unfinished stories pushed aside while you reread the same old text hoping that you can add to the blank pages in the back And while you study those worn, yellow pages you leave behind a library of fortune too late to discover With a flick of the thumb and a twist of the wrist these missed adventures become glowing embers on the asphalt a fading memory in my rear-view mirror
0
Oct 12, 2012
Oct 12, 2012 at 7:26 AM UTC
Embers on the Asphalt
Though in the public place arrives A winnowing on wisdom’s wind And threshers haste to finalize The harvest of its sifting breath Yet orphans cry and widows plead Their plight before the sacred site As seers peer upon the hearth Of ages, garnering their end!
0
Apr 14, 2012
Apr 14, 2012 at 11:19 AM UTC
Omega
hollow summer tomb, could be worse Waiting in your dark, this single world Keeps wasting away, I keep taking notes on truth that I find, in stories you tell Everything I fear, I see in you A poor disguise of choice, over wicked truth You're here for a while, I hope for the worst For all the other times, you still get through Cryptic walking In the daylight A feeling familiar Lost as it is Right now for now Something brushes past my shoulder Seething restless but We're not scared For now Circled round the moon, now sentient Curses lived in full, souls born to rend My best attempt, braced for the worst I know we'll find our ourselves. Again Lost inside the aftermath Finalize our disarray Starting down another path Of cold decay bought ourselves a little more Could've done with clarity Sunlight outside the tomb For the time remains But what I fear I see in you This unnerving wicked truth Why you're wrong I'll never say I hope for the worst
0
Dec 17, 2018
Dec 17, 2018 at 3:31 AM UTC
Graveyard Sun
As I stand beside and wonder, Of clouds and rain and thunder, What force or drive could be so great, To carry all your reckless hate? Who lied to you? Who let you down? Who pushed you back? Who stole your crown? Who stood you up, so proud and tall, Slipped away, watched you fall So surely you, such strength, such might, Would find this soul, and set them right, Meet their eye, hold their gaze, Finalize these torturous days, But to an end my thoughts conclude, Though not for me, but just for you, Your wrathful dreams may sail free, But just for you, not for me.
0
Sep 23, 2012
Sep 23, 2012 at 10:34 AM UTC
Choices
From atop mountains Of debt We tumble, like The thrill of defeat Dripping down The quivering chin Of blood-stained America. To quote a thunderstorm: "All who question The efficacy Of God Shall crumble To an infinity Of indecencies." To quote a God: "All who fall Have not Been pushed, Those who rose Were not all Pulled. **** the heathens. Justified are those Who avenge the treasons Committed unto me." Waves of Iridescence Cleanse our pallettes, And we open wide For the next forkful Of fermented Excrement. Bloodied are our knees As we receive The sacrement, Trapped like rats Cast in cement. To quote a slave: "Bound by prior Engagements, Sacrificed to Advertisement, The seeds of men Wither in the soil. Blood weeps From poisoned skies While YES WE CAN Opens eyes, And seals fate Within fine Print." Wolves in Cheap disguises Bate their breath Behind red grins And finalize The list of Who gets in, While in the cold Stand the masses, Marinating In their own Molasses. From atop Parnassus, A silver-lined horse Watches the madness, And snarls and spits In shamed defiance, While Apollo Holds court To form the alliance That will interrupt The defiling of man. To quote a soldier: "Cold is the mud That cradles The valiant. Swift is decay In these Transient days, Where passive Observers rot In mass graves." Designed by the rich, Assembled by slaves, Our system Keeps churning, Rejecting all Who misbehave. Reflected in Concentric waves, The faces of children Contemplate age, And what it means To be forever Enraged, Engaged in endeavors That are only dreams. They can't be saved, And neither can we. So it seems, And so it should be.
0
Jan 4, 2013
Jan 4, 2013 at 10:25 PM UTC
--Check For Pulse--
From atop mountains Of debt We tumble, like The thrill of defeat Dripping down The quivering chin Of blood-stained America. To quote a thunderstorm: "All who question The efficacy Of God Shall crumble To an infinity Of indecencies." To quote a God: "All who fall Have not Been pushed, Those who rose Were not all Pulled. **** the heathens. Justified are those Who avenge the treasons Committed unto me." Waves of Iridescence Cleanse our pallettes, And we open wide For the next forkful Of fermented Excrement. Bloodied are our knees As we receive The sacrement, Trapped like rats Cast in cement. To quote a slave: "Bound by prior Engagements, Sacrificed to Advertisement, The seeds of men Wither in the soil. Blood weeps From poisoned skies While YES WE CAN Opens eyes, And seals fate Within fine Print." Wolves in Cheap disguises Bate their breath Behind red grins And finalize The list of Who gets in, While in the cold Stand the masses, Marinating In their own Molasses. From atop Parnassus, A silver-lined horse Watches the madness, And snarls and spits In shamed defiance, While Apollo Holds court To form the alliance That will interrupt The defiling of man. To quote a soldier: "Cold is the mud That cradles The valiant. Swift is decay In these Transient days, Where passive Observers rot In mass graves." Designed by the rich, Assembled by slaves, Our system Keeps churning, Rejecting all Who misbehave. Reflected in Concentric waves, The faces of children Contemplate age, And what it means To be forever Enraged, Engaged in endeavors That are only dreams. They can't be saved, And neither can we. So it seems, And so it should be.
Continue reading...
103
This is hard for me to admit because I'm strong willed and stubborn But I wish you never left me for your original lover Thought that we had somethin'... Really, maybe it was nothin' Maybe you showed me all your cards but I still thought you was bluffin' By no means can you push me and make me fall any harder Why must the toughest lessons come from misery, heartbreak and trauma? You broke through my armor, Taught me how to speak drama, Things was heating up so much our hearts molded together like angry lava. Cause passion means pain and love means stress Nothing worst than giving someone your all only to receive back less. I gave it all to you, you hit the nail on the chest You really must of meant it when you whispered "I want to forever put your heart at rest" Maybe I'm being aggressive like you always said "I hate you" "get away" & "Please drop dead" Must of not recognized that words hurt just like fist Maybe I should of R estrained myself from calling you a "selfish b!tch" But you pushed me to this Don't lie, you know it Must of forgotten. It's not a good idea to **** off a poet. Now you're just words, ink that's bleed from my pen Your evil to my nightmares, my suffocation to vent My soul is clouded and bent I have nothin left They say you prosper when your body starts to slowly regress And I have no regrets They say "you live and you learn" Got that tatted permantially on all the scars from your lashings and burns. (You cut me deep) You morally killed me, mentally drilled me! You was looking for unauthentic, never the real me. Couldn't make you see *Because emotions make us blind I hope when you close your eyes, the memories haunt your mind.* As you walk all alone knowin' all the good you left behind. *All those long, draining times Trust me, I'm doing just fine.* Remember, it's the people you never needed that are most important, to finalize your design.
0
Apr 6, 2015
Apr 6, 2015 at 12:42 AM UTC
"Battled Emotions"
This is hard for me to admit because I'm strong willed and stubborn But I wish you never left me for your original lover Thought that we had somethin'... Really, maybe it was nothin' Maybe you showed me all your cards but I still thought you was bluffin' By no means can you push me and make me fall any harder Why must the toughest lessons come from misery, heartbreak and trauma? You broke through my armor, Taught me how to speak drama, Things was heating up so much our hearts molded together like angry lava. Cause passion means pain and love means stress Nothing worst than giving someone your all only to receive back less. I gave it all to you, you hit the nail on the chest You really must of meant it when you whispered "I want to forever put your heart at rest" Maybe I'm being aggressive like you always said "I hate you" "get away" & "Please drop dead" Must of not recognized that words hurt just like fist Maybe I should of R estrained myself from calling you a "selfish b!tch" But you pushed me to this Don't lie, you know it Must of forgotten. It's not a good idea to **** off a poet. Now you're just words, ink that's bleed from my pen Your evil to my nightmares, my suffocation to vent My soul is clouded and bent I have nothin left They say you prosper when your body starts to slowly regress And I have no regrets They say "you live and you learn" Got that tatted permantially on all the scars from your lashings and burns. (You cut me deep) You morally killed me, mentally drilled me! You was looking for unauthentic, never the real me. Couldn't make you see *Because emotions make us blind I hope when you close your eyes, the memories haunt your mind.* As you walk all alone knowin' all the good you left behind. *All those long, draining times Trust me, I'm doing just fine.* Remember, it's the people you never needed that are most important, to finalize your design.
Continue reading...
39
today I witnessed something so heart-wrenching, the sight of an old, stocky, bad-ass, with a golden heart, man be frail and in tears because he was on his way to finalize his divorce papers. something he'd never imagined of ever having to do to a woman who he loved, truly cared, and provided for thirty-seven years of marriage to end up finding out that she never loved him.
0
Oct 11, 2016
Oct 11, 2016 at 2:21 PM UTC
J.W.
I’m just twirling in the center of my room. I’ve got way too much to do. Has that ever happened to you? I’m assailed, derailed and impaled by indecision. I can’t find my lucky pencil and I have a final in 90 minutes I have lab results to qualify and a term paper to finish. I have two problem-sets due and I must arrange movers. Despite my burn-out, I should start packing for move-out. In order to get our reservations and tickets in hand, we’ve got to finalize our summer plans. On my theoretical schedule - I’m behind - oh, and there’s a mountain of laundry to climb. In finals week everything is ratcheted up. and there’s the weighty and unavoidable demands of sleep. I’m just a girl about to pass out in her room, over-caffeineed, from chugging a large, iced coffee after 3 hours of sleep. I’ve read that stress can affect valuations. I think it’s true. I twirl. . . Down In the Seine by The Style Council I Want You Back by Trijntje Oosterhuis Make a Rainbow by Benny Sings Let Her Go Into The Darkness by Johnathan Richman
0
May 3, 2024
May 3, 2024 at 10:15 AM UTC
twirling
I see you from a distance and it seems to be surreal So bizarre how just one glimpse can finalize the deal There’s no wonder what it is that captivates me so Picture perfect body with a flawless soul. Skin so soft like the touch of burnet Eyes so blue you can’t ever forget Hair waving carefree like the ocean Lips curling up with a secret notion You walk with confidence and pride Your face so expressive to how you feel inside But never arrogant nor superior Yet hold yourself steady with the poise of a warrior And all I see is perfection An exquisite little confection Of rosy cheeks, and when you speak I feel a bone-deep connection. Arms so sturdy, however yields to an embrace Never have I ever seen a lovelier face Don’t pass me by, please look my way Please give me hope, please, won’t you stay? I can see from the distance between you and me From tip to toe you are divine I can hardly wait to make you mine No more distance, pretty please? You’re so utterly lovely.
0
Jun 20, 2012
Jun 20, 2012 at 4:19 AM UTC
Utterly Lovely
i am older than i look younger than i feel with only death ahead of me to finalize and seal the deal
0
Oct 9, 2013
Oct 9, 2013 at 5:19 PM UTC
and you are?
Finalize your after thought Is it really what you thought? Was the outcome what you expected Was there more pain, than pleasure? Did his hungry eyes feed your appetite Or did they reproduce in your own sight? Do you feel refreshed and new Now that he's taken advantage of you? Or are you just like him? Always seeking your next victim Or is it that you are the victim? Do you even know who you are Or do you know what other people think you are? Have you stayed true to yourself To your thoughts To your religion Or do you purposefully Walk the path of temptation Maybe you've gotten lost Just to find yourself wandering Among all the others.
0
Nov 4, 2017
Nov 4, 2017 at 9:12 AM UTC
Self
Time eternal, time translucent of light Time in our hands Who would believe That we were once borne in a lifetime All by itself and the many generations That came after.. Time eternal as they say Yes..there is always a time for us But memories however vague Still color our world of make believe Reminiscent of an era not so long ago Taken by light as another dimension The wherefores, and henceforth Man so solid in light A time for us..time as you guessed It is in our hands Whether you open it To welcome opportunities Or when you close it to finalize matters To stand and corrected And be at peace with God.
0
Oct 8, 2014
Oct 8, 2014 at 1:49 AM UTC
A TIME FOR US
These words are long overdue But each time I sit before the screen It seems too impersonal A keyboard is incapable Of showing how my hands shake This paper holds the tears I shed though All of the late nights I spend praying for sleep I am unable to because I know Miles away you lay on your floor Music pulsing At the same tempo As the blood that flows freely How am I to sleep When I know you stare at the same night sky I feel you lie awake Making me unable to close my eyes But when I think of this Tears threaten to overflow I no longer can pick up my phone To see if you are truly awake Sometimes I hope you think of me often But I don’t want you to feel this pain I have lost my tether to reality that was you And no matter how you feel now I know you lost the one Who knew you the best How have you been Dear? I wish I could have called you last night My mind was slipping And the walls were closing in But I couldn’t call you I had to fall asleep on a tear soaked pillow Trembling in fear Thinking of what you would have said Has stopped helping Now I think of your tired voice Telling me it will all be okay Makes my throat close And my head spin It’s scary to think of How things change Who do you talk to now? Who has taken my place? Do you love them Like you loved me? Do your fingers hover over my number late at night? Can you feel that I need your strength? Has it crossed your mind That I’m scared to let someone else in? Once I recover From the constant shock That I can no longer call you My fingers rest calmly above someone else’s number But my heart races If I let them in That means you will never come back I already know you won’t But letting them see All that you have seen Will finalize it I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet But I know I need A new tether to reality ‘Cause freefalling Isn’t healthy
0
Jul 20, 2015
Jul 20, 2015 at 12:20 AM UTC
Long Overdue
These words are long overdue But each time I sit before the screen It seems too impersonal A keyboard is incapable Of showing how my hands shake This paper holds the tears I shed though All of the late nights I spend praying for sleep I am unable to because I know Miles away you lay on your floor Music pulsing At the same tempo As the blood that flows freely How am I to sleep When I know you stare at the same night sky I feel you lie awake Making me unable to close my eyes But when I think of this Tears threaten to overflow I no longer can pick up my phone To see if you are truly awake Sometimes I hope you think of me often But I don’t want you to feel this pain I have lost my tether to reality that was you And no matter how you feel now I know you lost the one Who knew you the best How have you been Dear? I wish I could have called you last night My mind was slipping And the walls were closing in But I couldn’t call you I had to fall asleep on a tear soaked pillow Trembling in fear Thinking of what you would have said Has stopped helping Now I think of your tired voice Telling me it will all be okay Makes my throat close And my head spin It’s scary to think of How things change Who do you talk to now? Who has taken my place? Do you love them Like you loved me? Do your fingers hover over my number late at night? Can you feel that I need your strength? Has it crossed your mind That I’m scared to let someone else in? Once I recover From the constant shock That I can no longer call you My fingers rest calmly above someone else’s number But my heart races If I let them in That means you will never come back I already know you won’t But letting them see All that you have seen Will finalize it I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet But I know I need A new tether to reality ‘Cause freefalling Isn’t healthy
Continue reading...
65
Red, raw, raging regret As far away as you can get You make me want to hurt myself To collapse into a shallow shelf Shame is eating my head away Pain is bleeding and here to stay How can you say everything is okay? That I am not killing you every day? We need to talk. We need to walk. We need to finalize what we feel. We need to get all these feelings out To remove our hands from our swollen mouths This is all a nightmare. My stomach churns and you don't care. You said yourself you're numb to me. Please, oh please, don't let that be. I am so, so, so, so, so, so sorry My aching eyes are closing hardly There must be something left in you For you keep writing about me. Don't think I can't see it, it's so true. Why won't you let me be in love with you? Please, let's talk. Please. See me soon.
0
Aug 14, 2010
Aug 14, 2010 at 11:47 PM UTC
You Confuse Me.
we fall in love so the one we are falling for catches us. When they let us fall, it's hard to recover. It is not an easy fall. It's one that is damaging. It's one that takes a while to cure.   When you fall in love and you do not land well, you finalize with a broken heart.
0
Aug 9, 2017
Aug 9, 2017 at 10:04 PM UTC
Falling in love
Despite being atheist, with serpent teen eyes, I would nonetheless bet Eve fen number guys named Adam, or gals noel lies (christened) dollars to donuts (Dunkin and/or otherwise) Jesus would be mighty pleased to know, his sir name linkedin with commercial ties, no matter, he might not garner rise zen percentage of profits, no matter spies infiltrate competition especially if he unwittingly gets trampled and cries amidst chaos (think euthanize) untimely death by madding wise flash mob crowd source realize last seconds rushing to snap up latest jamb door prize as venders resort to all manner of (subliminally manipulative) marketing techniques to lure patrons, (especially photo opportunities with one of the many "FAKE" donned Santa Claus), the latter, who would lionize their son(s) and/or apprise daughter(s), subsequently guaranteeing, nailing crosswise, and clinching safeguards exercise immunization against the Grinch sure fire way to manure er... fertilize guarantee future generations rise zing will become avid consumers, who reverently, obsequiously, and devoutly idolize supporting the apostles who revolutionize creative commercialization to capitalize nearly every Cyber Monday occasion to finalize (all sales) pennies on the dollar, where merchants feign going for broke, and capitalize eulogize, and idealize the mighty buck staging "FAKE" news worthy shoppers to burst into tears crying on command, and all manner of pathos pulling ploys nsync king "shameful guilt" that squares with being ostracized, hash-tagged, and demonized Scrooge.
0
Dec 14, 2019
Dec 14, 2019 at 1:14 AM UTC
The Bajillion Dollar Business Of Christmas circa December 2019
Despite being atheist, with serpent teen eyes, I would nonetheless bet Eve fen number guys named Adam, or gals noel lies (christened) dollars to donuts (Dunkin and/or otherwise) Jesus would be mighty pleased to know, his sir name linkedin with commercial ties, no matter, he might not garner rise zen percentage of profits, no matter spies infiltrate competition especially if he unwittingly gets trampled and cries amidst chaos (think euthanize) untimely death by madding wise flash mob crowd source realize last seconds rushing to snap up latest jamb door prize as venders resort to all manner of (subliminally manipulative) marketing techniques to lure patrons, (especially photo opportunities with one of the many "FAKE" donned Santa Claus), the latter, who would lionize their son(s) and/or apprise daughter(s), subsequently guaranteeing, nailing crosswise, and clinching safeguards exercise immunization against the Grinch sure fire way to manure er... fertilize guarantee future generations rise zing will become avid consumers, who reverently, obsequiously, and devoutly idolize supporting the apostles who revolutionize creative commercialization to capitalize nearly every Cyber Monday occasion to finalize (all sales) pennies on the dollar, where merchants feign going for broke, and capitalize eulogize, and idealize the mighty buck staging "FAKE" news worthy shoppers to burst into tears crying on command, and all manner of pathos pulling ploys nsync king "shameful guilt" that squares with being ostracized, hash-tagged, and demonized Scrooge.
Continue reading...
54
Dear Photographer, I’m begging to please, Photo shoot me... I want a happy portrait; The one my lips were commonly clasped together, And my eyes were looking somewhere. Adorn me with warm colors to shows it’s a joyful moment. Focus your lens, in the angle of my heart, and never mind what they could not see but yours can do. Please use the rule of thirds grid In highlighting the spaces of my frames That would make a better composition, If not your creativity will seek it ground. If only you can add light into it, Please do, it’s a favor to hide What dark does in each life.. P.S Retouch and finalize me for public viewing, so it wore a mouth, for brilliant minds.
0
Jun 11, 2014
Jun 11, 2014 at 2:38 AM UTC
A Letter
It's been so long since the last entree I've been stuck, lost my scribbled sheets my mind is empty but fully chaotic of words unsaid, unwritten, undone. Can someone reach out? I'm drowning, falling deep I'd like to be saved, I'd like to be spared, kept safe in the midst of crowded lies. My soul is caged, locked down by frozen dreams, tied up by unfinished poems, tortured by crumpled music notes. I want to be free; where my pen can write the words, where my lips can speak rhymes, where my heart can finalize songs.
0
Jun 14, 2018
Jun 14, 2018 at 10:30 AM UTC
Borderline
I look back and I witness the mess I created. No wonder words cannot justify the remorse that I carry on my shoulders; the pain that radiates from my “I like you too”. Going down memory lane I remember the 1460 days in which I built high walls made of concrete, as I sat there and shot down every love story that the world had. I yearn for your touch yet at the same time the fear that comes with such a feeling overwhelms me. I believe I am broken, shattered into a million pieces that cannot be made whole. Your efforts pain me because you are the ideal idea I dream of. I somewhat hope you could read my mind, I somehow hope that I could end up in your arms, where I could feel safe. I do admit it; love was wrongly accused by my empty soul until your tenacity filled me with hope.  I hate the fact that I am this giant that may never become a miniature. I hate the fact that I hate me. I hate the fact that you could love a heartless monster like me. **** I said the forbidden word, LOVE! Even my own subconscious glares at me with utter disappointment. I hate the fact that I care, the fact that it hurts. But then again burying my emotions is what I am good at. I believe I am a master of my own destruction, I do not believe in flowers, romantic dinners and surprises but one thing I know is that I believe you, I believe in you. In my vague idea of “us” we do ride into the sunset. We get that happily ever after. The thought of you being my knight in shining amour petrifies me to the core. I am afraid that I will care too much, that I will love too much. Yes, I do believe in love because you gave me that. You gave me the spirit to believe in something I hated to the ends of the earth. As I drown in a pool of my own condemnation, I keep looking up, I keep swimming, and I keep letting my soul sail because I hope that you may save me. Finally it then hits me; I sentence you and love 25 to life. If you keep your promise to never leave, I will keep my promise of giving you this warm heart of mine that is caged in concrete walls. If you promise to be there when it matters, when I succeed , when I fail, when I cry or worse when I shut down and try to push you away. If you promise to hold me till I feel like the walls are not closing in, I promise to unlock all these doors I have shut. I hope that you will hold my hand till I finalize my divorce with death. I hope that you can piece me together. But then these are just thoughts I never voice, these are voices in my own head. Every love story has a happy ending and in this one, you are my happy ending because you set me free from my own prison and complete the person I was meant to be.
0
Sep 14, 2014
Sep 14, 2014 at 3:23 PM UTC
BEHIND MY FAKE SMILE....
I look back and I witness the mess I created. No wonder words cannot justify the remorse that I carry on my shoulders; the pain that radiates from my “I like you too”. Going down memory lane I remember the 1460 days in which I built high walls made of concrete, as I sat there and shot down every love story that the world had. I yearn for your touch yet at the same time the fear that comes with such a feeling overwhelms me. I believe I am broken, shattered into a million pieces that cannot be made whole. Your efforts pain me because you are the ideal idea I dream of. I somewhat hope you could read my mind, I somehow hope that I could end up in your arms, where I could feel safe. I do admit it; love was wrongly accused by my empty soul until your tenacity filled me with hope.  I hate the fact that I am this giant that may never become a miniature. I hate the fact that I hate me. I hate the fact that you could love a heartless monster like me. **** I said the forbidden word, LOVE! Even my own subconscious glares at me with utter disappointment. I hate the fact that I care, the fact that it hurts. But then again burying my emotions is what I am good at. I believe I am a master of my own destruction, I do not believe in flowers, romantic dinners and surprises but one thing I know is that I believe you, I believe in you. In my vague idea of “us” we do ride into the sunset. We get that happily ever after. The thought of you being my knight in shining amour petrifies me to the core. I am afraid that I will care too much, that I will love too much. Yes, I do believe in love because you gave me that. You gave me the spirit to believe in something I hated to the ends of the earth. As I drown in a pool of my own condemnation, I keep looking up, I keep swimming, and I keep letting my soul sail because I hope that you may save me. Finally it then hits me; I sentence you and love 25 to life. If you keep your promise to never leave, I will keep my promise of giving you this warm heart of mine that is caged in concrete walls. If you promise to be there when it matters, when I succeed , when I fail, when I cry or worse when I shut down and try to push you away. If you promise to hold me till I feel like the walls are not closing in, I promise to unlock all these doors I have shut. I hope that you will hold my hand till I finalize my divorce with death. I hope that you can piece me together. But then these are just thoughts I never voice, these are voices in my own head. Every love story has a happy ending and in this one, you are my happy ending because you set me free from my own prison and complete the person I was meant to be.
Continue reading...
7
The bottom the bottle of whiskey Bashes my insides and face with wrinkles Strewn about my eyes and smile, Wildly grown from the child I seek inside myself So hypocritically That innocence I contemplate As I **** and pillage my morals with Actions so contemptible and occasionally Outrageous I want to repeat HYPOCRITICAL I yell as that innocence beckons me My simpler thoughts distorted by mad, mad silly behaviors of an actor I’ve acted to be Because this actor Others will act like This mad, silly rampage has left for me nothing but ink on paper, napkin paper, carbon paper, construction paper, rolling paper, paper for later and notebook paper This paper my savior allowing me to finalize and analyze my actor’s mad, mad , silly behavior.
0
Oct 7, 2015
Oct 7, 2015 at 8:55 PM UTC
Paper: the Savior