"combusting" poems
Feathers glimmer and shine
As though covered in fish oil
I lubricate the brain
As I slip through the sky
With a frictionless flicker
My lightening wings
Brain waves rapidly fluctuate
Perfect balance held
Between left and right
Each wing a hemisphere
As they beat and beat
Accelerating into hyper speed
80 to a hundred or more
Beats per second
As though injected
With a sonic speed
Synapses bursting and exploding
Exponentially connecting
Blistering wing speed
I become electric
My circuits exploring
Rippling and flickering through paper
My brain comes alive
Flashing multicolored lights
Like the cities nights
But still spaces collect around me
As I am buffered from the world
Perfectly still though standing
On an invisible ledge
I hold my mind in place
While I hum in space
Head down I drop my beak
Into a funnel of concentration
As I tunnel into trumpets
Penetrating deep I flower
In new knowledge
Polar aspects of mind
Released through coherent communication
Set free with coordination
I seek to marry chalk and cheese
As I hold the balance
Between two worlds
Flashing synapses firing
And combusting
Against pointed concentration
My mind juggles two *****
Expanding into their fullness
Expressing vibrant color
My slippery slender beak
Slips and slides in
As I flutter through pages
I discover new unexpected surprises
Problems solved, Startling adventures
And puzzles completed
I find the sugary syrup
The delicate delicious sweet spot
With the thrill of falling domino's
Spilling and cascading
Many ripples fanning out
Through my mind
I find freedom
Each ripple massaging my mind
I am catapulted into outer space
I dance from fact to golden fact
As I am propelled forward on stardust
My momentum shoots me forward
I bounce and bounce
My mind becoming unbounded
I enjoy this great Hummingbird delight
Dec 18, 2014
Dec 18, 2014 at 1:05 PM UTC
you're a melancholic blue rock
who's oblivious to what you're parallel of
just a slight erosion I noticed,
as I picked up
the little crumbles
the gem stones
the tears
crystallizing under crushing pressure;
I know it's aching,
some time to tether
you're (spontaneously) combusting
but you're still as dainty as a feather
don't have to look at your reflection,
just your shadows
then you'll see you're illuminating
and now you know
you're more than enough
you were just
a diamond in the rough.
May 21, 2014
May 21, 2014 at 10:14 PM UTC
~
*A fire built within
We come together
we break apart
A wind that blows past
and does not return
Carnival of light
moving colors
in the overcurrent
Where is heaven above?
You'll only hear
the hummingbird
skyward bound
Before finally combusting
somewhere in
the upper atmosphere
The resulting cloud
is probably still up there
— more proof that it pays
to shoot for the stars*
~
Dec 21, 2021
Dec 21, 2021 at 9:22 AM UTC
I should waste more time revising. I feel as though it may benefit me; may I extrapolate the fact I stated waste more time, not spend. I could use that time practicing songs on my bass or beating Mario’s *** on the GameCube. I feel mediocre but that’s okay because I AM mediocre; and a sell-out. I should make that point clear. I smoke; not like a chimney, it depends on if I feel like combusting into a cloud of tobacco ash. I would happily crementate my being. I would happily get hit by a car and become the road **** I would happily fall from a concrete building into a six foot deep cavern. Passive suicidal thoughts at eight in the mourning; just like coffee but it doesn’t make you need to **** Just those bitter moments you need to get your day started on the wrong side of the bed.
Jul 7, 2014
Jul 7, 2014 at 2:53 PM UTC
Hidden coves of love disguised by cold eyes
Chances not yet given.
Angry tones escape tooth filled holes
Drilling dissent through another's soul.
Selfish is the only answer,
yet not an excuse.
Forgive the fool.
He is you
She is I
We are one.
Negative polarities combusting innocent eyes.
Lost in the essence of the moment.
This is an apology for the mournful cries.
forgive the fool
he is you
she is I
we are one.
distinct beings intertwined amongst the influx
passengers and neighbors, reactive tension
impulses of separation.
pause for a moment. breath together.
similar beings galvanized by difference
nutrition for acceptance.
forgive the fool
he is you
she is I
we are one.
Feb 15, 2010
Feb 15, 2010 at 11:53 AM UTC
Then it hit me:
You're my hiraeth
You never held home in your heart
Only smelled like it when you held me in your arms
You've got wanderer written inside your bones
You could never be my home
I only thought you were
Because I wanted you to be
I wanted to belong with you, inside four walls, forever
But we were meant to explode and burn
There's no caution to our love
We can't be each other's security
Our love is made of fire and stars, combusting and combusting until there's nothing left behind
But I'll let you be my hiraeth
Because you hold adventure in your eyes
Begging me with just a look "one more ride?"
And I know you've got a string tied around my heart
As i run along side
Then it hit me:
You're my ephemeral
You were never meant to last
Only held too much wisdom in your past
You're going to die before you're old
For only so long can your veins pump gold
I only thought you would last
Because I wanted you to
I wanted you to be forever, to lay here forever with me, at home
But you were meant to burn out
Live fast, love hard, and die before your time
You can't be my forever
We are made of matches and candles and rushed kisses and goodbyes
But I'll let you be my ephemeral
Because you hold knowledge in your eyes
And when I beg you "just one last ride?"
You smile as if you know it will be
Because every moment is your last
Sep 3, 2016
Sep 3, 2016 at 9:18 PM UTC
my therapist says, it's time you write about your psychosis
I show her a journal full of names, and some dreams
That I may or may not have had.
Inside my journal, there are pieces of my body and flowers,
There is a to-do list with nothing crossed off,
There is a hidden script for a medication I never got filled;
There are pictures over every word, disguised in a metaphor
I can't remember the language to describe.
Expression makes the most sense when you are
Expressing the bad.
This is eruption, compulsion that is combusting from my pencil and into black ink.
I point to the bugs that crawl over the page and say,
I don't have to. My psychosis is in every line.
It is in my eyes darting back and forth.
I write so much the page turns black and I have to erase it.
My psychosis is the shadow trail behind every letter.
It is the blood coming out of my mouth when I say I'll Do Better,
The scratches on my hands and feet are from holding on too tight
To demons that know how to fight back.
It is my teeth, and the holes inside of them, spit onto the page.
Spit onto the floor of my therapists wooden office.
I wince. I turn the page.
I try to say it so many times it becomes meaningless.
You wouldn't believe me if I told you.
I spit again.
My mind looks like a ******* minefield and these words are just the smoke.
Aug 17, 2019
Aug 17, 2019 at 6:25 PM UTC
Mother threw me away
****** me in and spit me out
The pavement still tastes like your thighs
Like bubble gum underneath the chemistry table
Where I first held hands with
Some other girl I loved
Not knowing her reaction but
We burned flowers cut with kitchen knives.
I woke up to ashes lining my breakfast
Tongue thick with Amaryllis
Thinking if God asks you my name
Say serpent,
Say hello —
A disaster of two elements
You and me
If we combined
Our neon wrists.
Does Ares care about
How I touch you, with the lights off
You tell me the walls
Already know
What I do with my wolf teeth
And your caffeinated bellybutton,
They find you in three nights.
Rebirth is not as kind
To my combusting spine, replace
Ghost sin with your birth right
Jacob’s carnage
I paid for with eyelashes,
Long glances — my dignity
Wrapped in ****** white, and impotent boy skin
Becomes a coffin.
Sep 1, 2016
Sep 1, 2016 at 11:41 PM UTC
Lair lair! waste my time
Lair liar! equivalent to slime
Built me a home under a delusion
Therefore my absence is the resolution
Liar Liar! You are disgusting
My respect for you is just combusting
Liar Liar! Waste my time
Lair Lair! committed sins
Now pay for your crimes
Feb 12, 2017
Feb 12, 2017 at 4:14 PM UTC
finishing a book
is just like
killing a christian family
on a drunk Sunday drive
finishing a book
is just like
slamming your clean-shaven face
into a brick wall
finishing a book
is just like
inhaling pure oxygen
and then spontaneously combusting
into thin air
finishing a book
is just like
brushing your teeth so hard
that crimson paste drips from
the corners of your mouth
finishing a book
is just like
watching a toddler bathe
himself in lighter fluid
finishing a book
is just like
puking when you're passed out.
Oct 23, 2011
Oct 23, 2011 at 9:42 PM UTC
But oh he was wet and dripping ignorance
And I was combusting with unholy fury
Smiting him to and fro
With my unsheathed pen
And he sat struck dumb
Morally zombie like moaning again
For my skin
But I just wrote wicked hymns
Life graffiti, like rings of fire
And he dared not behold these cat
Eyes
and black widow smirk
“Her defense was frightening”
A phrase he said himself
To whom self still turning like
Clockwork from the very
Spoils it never left
And I went like laughing
Knowing well I was no psychopath
But wrote honest colors of the world
In black ink and white paper
Blowing his mind
Like streetlamps in the midst of ill-mannered
Children with heavy rocks
And how I was amazed
When I saw
That bead of sweat
Run down those taunt brows
Like a floating messiah
With no duty but to be heard
And if I tried to express
This dear loved ones
I would nonetheless
Use words putting us both in
Abashment
But oh was it impossible he gave
What I sought
No longer listening to the little jesus
That caused him to convulse to and fro
Every night
And behold so he spoke:
“You are the first girl that ever
Really made me think”
Tone affectionate, not resenting
And I swear I felt it
I felt world peace
And he cursed me
With the very touch
That I longed for
And feared
I guess I knew not
Everything in the world.
Dec 4, 2010
Dec 4, 2010 at 2:17 PM UTC
I know, that I am mostly untrusting,
combusting with thoughts and was lusting for the attention that I know I wasn't gettin'.
But whatever this is it's not set in stone.
I think it's getting close to the time where I find a new home.
I've released all those those attachments that made me feel less than I was,
cuz throughout all the ******** I've risen above.
I'll show you love, without you making the first move.
Aint nothin to do but continue ridin' on my life groove.
You're in or you're out, but that choice is mine 'til I know what you're really about.
Potentially remove you from my doubts and travel new routes.
What the hell is this a competition for, it aint fun.
It's like you're keeping score but don't even know the numbers, with that I'm done.
This isn't the first time and surely won't be the last.
The way you run from your problems...yeah you really are fast.
Try scoping out your true identity and then you'll see what's really meant to be.
I don't know what it is you can't see.
I think it's about time you set yourself free.
Jun 9, 2012
Jun 9, 2012 at 9:36 PM UTC
A week and a half, a year before ship sails
Azalea path was already paved
Soon I found someone in the same state of mind as me
All insane of astrology, all insane of metaphors
There's this delirium episode going inside of me that made me
slash what carried me far to see if I could survive worse
even tried the continuum oblivion
till I dare my hands to drive me in to an atom collision
There are times when it wasn't all about wars
I spent it combusting to few places
When and where snow is an empire usurped by crippled leaves in the fall.
Fall, fall, fall
It was him who falls and leaves.
One night, or one day, I don't quite care
but that is when I got away
I ran with flames not yet ignited
I barricade the commotion out with flimsy threads, all I can think
Didn't even thought threads spread flames (if it's ignited)
(Well now it's ignited)
And someone caught up in it
I can still hear him even now
*That's the end of my life
The rest is posthumous*
talking me up
Nov 9, 2014
Nov 9, 2014 at 11:38 PM UTC
He writes invisible lines on horizontal, murk.
Twisting the phalanx lance similar to a shimmering rod
The iron blade edge combusting moth shrimp
As they ride onto a load to gather currency
The coal-burning Noise-whale, a collector
Twists a symphonic of wrench and groan
Under the gargling wail of fuel
As well as pistons, the reflection of The Tired.
They rest hovering topside, crouched
And struck by the whipping lash of colour
The rope wrenches into the horizontal,
Winching the Oxen toward the catch
Winching until nets rip in like horizontal pull
Surfacing up through murk with a feverish shine
And shifting away to naked frailty
That glory The Tired had began to behold.
Apr 28, 2013
Apr 28, 2013 at 6:40 AM UTC
What if the Earth stopped its long flight and finally stood still?
the gods controlling the universe, hiding in our footsteps, suddenly tired of our inadequacies and decided
to end this grand cosmic charade.
Coming out of Shadows
and out of foot steps . perception
torn asunder
and reality recognized as our own inept construct. When in truth perhaps, buy some vain hope,
those ideas invoices we held dear ,
like pin ****** a lighthouse is in the dark and vast ocean,
are found to be merely sparks in the wind,
buffeted and intangible
and the earth suddenly stops.
And the asteroid belt is too small.
and the combusting Sun fails.
And the most frightening possibility of all ?
Will foot steps fade into darkness?
will there be time to dig a final grave what to say last
goodbye?
And will we be seen as works in progress or graded as complete?
Jul 13, 2013
Jul 13, 2013 at 12:40 AM UTC
It isn't just a flame
Burning within me
(cannot extinguish with your loving words)
It isn't only the rotten smell of overcooked thoughts
(I'd still love to eat their bitterness away)
Although it is...
It is me and my love for thee,
You who makes me a poet,
Who makes me feel enough to feel human
Whether it's sadness, happiness, hatred or jealousy
(oh that silly stinging heart of mine)
No... It's a contagious forest fire
Combusting my sanity towards those
Near you; Lived and living or loving
(how readily my tears want to burn them)
It's known it's not healthy
But you don't see it's my love anyway
Even when I am angry with you
(nothing that you're responsible for)
And mime my thoughts out to you
So you never understand.
By the time this forest obliterates,
It's all just too late to tell you,
And again,
The ash is buried inside,
Waiting to reignite,
Soon.
Jun 24, 2017
Jun 24, 2017 at 4:36 PM UTC
you look me in the eyes and you tell me i don't know what i'm doing but i fire back with a tongue that can lash every single wound you thought was healed open that no, you don't know what you're doing
sure, i may look at you the way the sun stretches across this city and clings onto every ray of grass it can find, and your body imprint in my bed and my memory is perhaps always going to be there, but that does not mean i cannot fall out of love with you
to the boy who will break my heart undoubtedly, know that i will try to break yours first, even though i will ultimately probably fail
know that i will try to kiss every other stranger i can find in attempts to wash out the taste of your perfect lips from mine, know that i will drink to the bottom of every glass they hand me to try to erase the feeling of skin on skin, the feeling of sweat combining and combusting into a deep, fiery love
i won't lie when i tell you that every glass of wine we drank together was an attempt for me to separate myself but you go one step back and i step two steps forward; maybe i will always be the girl that was stuck inside of your head for the early days of december when my looks and my om attracted something in you that not even your relationship status could ignore, maybe something inside of me convinced you that i was different
but, dear boy, know that you - you are not a man, and you still have a long way to go to reach that illustrious status you so badly want to claim
know that when you grab parts of my body i never knew existed, know that when you let me build a home inside of your eyes and your hands, know that when you kiss me innocently or not, that you would never do this if you were a man, because men
well, they wouldn't let me watch them break my own heart
Jan 20, 2016
Jan 20, 2016 at 7:55 PM UTC
Paroxysms of the galaxy
Ricochet throughout the universe;
Stars ripple and quake--
Combusting eternally,
Shattering melodically,
Spreading prismatic haloes.
Blindingly, blastingly, beautiful
Is the collapse of creation.
Mar 24, 2014
Mar 24, 2014 at 10:00 PM UTC
I have parted ways with my body
Because my mind isn't present
My heart, a charcoal gray: foggy
Has little passion since our dissent
I wrote dainty letters for you
Romantic, lengthy confessions.
Every empty word- away each flew
Whilst wading daily in depression.
Softly my soul fades with my love.
A hollow hole cut deep in your heart-
By unkind hope: an olive branching dove--
Is the coal that fuels this hatred art.
This suffering manifests my mind.
Winds blustering my common sense,
And life muttering "Are you blind?"
My body is combusting in defense .
Revenge begs me to set you ablaze-
Compassion treads across this hell,
Speaks and heads into the insane,
Pulls me by the threads out of a spell.
I restrain from you- I am free -
I won't mention your infidelity.
Just make me feel not absentee.
I'm just done being unhappy.
Jul 1, 2014
Jul 1, 2014 at 4:39 AM UTC
I remember pressing my
innocent ears to the mouths
of discarded seashells, just to
hear their secrets; and I shared mine.
They told me secrets in the form of
ocean waves and whispers of wind
between the fingers of the palms.
On days that I feel the world
crumbling and combusting
around me, I press my wiser
ears to the same lips that kept
all my secrets safe. I remember
the advice seashells gave to a
young girl who'd felt discarded.
Be like the ocean, let it flow.
Dec 5, 2017
Dec 5, 2017 at 12:26 AM UTC
I am honey coated
In the dawn yellow sun
As I walk softly
Through the glazing savanna
Intimately married to
My body I feel all
Her strength and power
My low center of gravity
Pushes down 2 tonnes
Of my power house weight
Almost buckles the ground
It is as though the earth
Beneath me becomes concave
As I stand on a spongy soil
As the landscape rolls up
To a brand new sun
If the rest of me forgets
Where I am going submerged
In flaky doubt my hard horn
Points the course through the
Clouds of apposing forces
As even the Gods are forced
To part the way like the red sea
As I plough through space and time
Nothing dictates to me
As I chase away darkness
And carve out doubt
Breaking spells while proceeding
All ghost will run from me
Possessed by the devil
I will DRIVE him out
For I am the AFRICAN EXORCIST
Careful where you step
Because I hang over
The savanna like a
Silent volcano
Run and hide if you
Ever hear the huff and
Puff of my disgruntled being
As you better get out the way
Without any delay
As I blaze new pathways
Showing you a brand new day
As I smash through obstacles
You or the world
I feel my center speaking
Opening , EXPLODING into
Inside out spaces
Multiverses are vibrating
As I ride on a wave
Of infinite forces
combusting
I am fired forward
With rocket fuel
As I reach new places
Expanding into worlds
Of high and far out spaces
Greater than I know
Hesitation and procrastination
Will be trampled on
All those blown over by life
Jump on my back
And I will stampede you
Through this world
So dare you attack
Or cover my track like weeds
With feeble words and excuses
As they strangle my future path
And my lava filled belly
Will blast them with fire
Melting and molding
My internal landscape
As I imprint my freedom
How I love you Black Rhino
You have my attention
So can you please point
Your horn in the right direction
FORWARD AND UP
Forward and up for me
As I ride with the BLACK RHINO
Nov 19, 2014
Nov 19, 2014 at 2:10 PM UTC
am I an observer
or a participator,
this life, a reel or real
am I whole, or partial?
this is all surreal
are we living
or watching time spill
doing nothing
rotating in this cosmic realm,
starting where we started,
ending where we end,
rolling the rock up the mountain
watching it fall
traveling back up again.
what is the deal?
we know the prison,
let's dig up the tunnel.
am I a spectator,
or a perpetrator,
this death, a dream or dire,
am I fractured, or entire?
this is all infernal,
are we decaying,
or watching shadows crawl,
doing something,
descending into this chthonic realm,
starting where we're buried,
ending where we're born,
our remains part of the earth,
watching it crumble,
crawling back down again.
what is the ordeal?
we know the freedom,
Are we combusting chemical?
Feb 7, 2025
Feb 7, 2025 at 11:41 AM UTC
Did you get to sleep
Or are you marinating
in chemicals?
The nightcap pulled
you down
dragged you
with your breath
You cut deep
Did you figure your
insides out?
You're inside out
spilling your guts
again
off-balanced
like an unstable
vivisection
Combusting your soul
back to a black hole
Counted off stars
in your eyes
you swore were aligned
Do you know what's behind?
Or will you keep looking?
Out there the truth isn't
it's all a reality
hallucinogen
generation of
self-prescribed nomads
It's about the journey
somewhere there lies
a destination
Lying about it's age again
and you can't touch it
Yet
it was here
the whole time
this very moment
and it's so
*******
beautiful
if you can get out
of your own mind.
Oct 24, 2013
Oct 24, 2013 at 3:04 PM UTC