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Chloe Zafonte Apr 20
I don't get haunted by ghost. I get haunted by memories of people who are still alive, just not around anymore.
Life went from college and working, traveling with no rest. This all changed with a pregnancy test.

Long naps, mood swings and craving unhealthy snacks. To sleepless nights, kicks in the ribs, heartburn that made my chest flare. I knew you would have a lot of hair.

On April 6th, you were born. After 3 days of labour, it was **** and I was torn. 8 lbs 1 oz with black hair and blue eyes, with the loudest cry.

Life then went from a quite room to one full of cries at night. Rocking you in the cradle swing, listening to nursery rhymes and to you I'd sing.

Endless amounts of diapers filling the trash, freaking out over a mild rash. Tummy time on the play mat, crawling on the floor, now preventing you from running out the door.

Now I'm stepping on toys, buying bigger clothing sizes in toddler boys. Spending extra money I could of saved, making me want to crawl into a cave.

But I cherish every day. Through all the screaming, teething, random bites, when putting you into clothing is a fight.

Even when you make me sleep half way off the bed, repeat words that I shouldn't of said. The cuddles during nap time, watching Sesame Street, tickling your chubby feet.

In 4 days, it will be your birthday! Hooray! With all the stress of birthday plans, I'm so happy for my little man.

Watching you grow up is all your mom could ask for. Happy early birthday my little explorer.
For my son Jacob Rigel Alcantar.
Narcissistic is not just a toxic relationship with your boyfriend of one year. It can be a parent, a friend, a cousin or someone you love, dear.

  It's when they give up their own responsibilities to depend on you for money, childcare or a ride in the car. If you confront them. Your luck won't go very far.

  You'll belittle you over one little mistake like not washing a dish or leaving a crumb on the table. Restrict you from friends, lovers, family because they're you're parent, partner or whatever it is the label.

   You'll be made to feel unworthy and treated like trash. Take pride in authority as you become their *****. Every peer will be brought up to hate you and you'll be the highlight to bash.  

  You'll be trapped, items will be stolen from you, they'll hurt your children, you will be framed and blamed for what you didn't do. Call the police, tell a friend or relative. But no one will believe it because they've manipulated everyone but you!

  A pretty face or kind demeanor is the who they appear. Your peers will becoming sheep to their lies with words such as " I'm a person of God" and many hoaxed stories to tell. Cross them, your life will become the fifth layer of ****.

  When confronted they fabricate it with lies such as " I do this for you" when you get no benefit from the deed. You can argue with them all day, but refuse to take heed.

  They will monitor your activities, making you feel like a juvenile. "You can't use this no longer" and send you miles away to do so. You'll never be good enough for their home. Wait for an escape for quite a while.

  You can bend over backwards for this said person and nothing will be good enough. Clean their home! Give them money, drive them to work, love them with soul. Their hatred for you never grow old.

  You are nothing but an object. You are free ***, an ATM, a chance to get drunk or high, or a tax return. You'll be nothing but inheritance or sympathy when or if you die.

    When you finally escape this slavery. You will have scars, passing the neighborhood where it happened, hearing their name in a conversation, or coming across something they gave you long ago. If anything, celebrate your bravery!

  You escaped such a harsh time, you stood up for yourself when it cost everything. You are living life without the person you thought you'd die without. You are a warrior without a doubt.
For the men and women who've put up with a parent, friend, partner or authority they made your life ****. If you are no longer in that situation I'm proud of you.
Chloe Zafonte Dec 2018
Life was a drug. I'm smoking what could of been. Inhaling the thought of freedom and where I should be. Embracing the sadness of withdrawing and going back to where I started.
Chloe Zafonte Dec 2018
They say if you're poor, your lazy. Tell that to the elderly working minimum wage jobs, yeah I know ****'s crazy. Get a Master's degree just to end up working at starbucks, needing experience to work a low level job. We can all strive for success were all just getting robbed. When in need of a place, you need to make 3 times the rent, when we're only paid 11.50 or less and they wonder why millions are sleeping in tents. College professors are eligible for food stamps, while their CEO is eating up their salary. If I had to paint a picture more clear, it would be in an art gallery. Helping the poor is being put on a 4 year waiting list, government aid you can hardly live off of while the rest are just praying the Lord above. Having to apply to live in a shelter for limited time for people who carry less than a dime. I can say no more. A simple solution, we could only wish for. Now it's just a fight to the top, to make your living situation as solid as a rock.
Chloe Zafonte Sep 2018
It has been hard to let go you know. Brushing off everything like wind and snow. Even after all the drugs, and jail, thinking you'd come back to your old self. You slip my feet out from under the rug, and again you fail. Coming around trying to make me think you want to be a Dad, my bad! I thought wrong, you're a fake. On my own is where I belong, make up your mind for Christ sake! I'm Fred in a ****** Doo episode, uncovering your mask, you're an ******* all long. I was always there for you, never even had to ask, I gave you chances you didn't deserve, all you've ever done was kick us to the curb. I now say goodbye to you. Have fun in another city! I hope you regret your actions, that were nothing but ******.
Chloe Zafonte Aug 2018
I feel ****** for writing this, but I'll go ahead and take the risk. Airplanes that go by reminds me of when we watched them near the airport last July. Grocery shopping in the local store knowing that you won't hug me from behind anymore, sitting in the back of the cab on the way home, the sights we use to roam. The stuffed dragon that sits on my shelf, God I need some help! As well as the early morning sky when the moon shined, because you'd always pick me up at that at time. Most importantly a little baby boy who shares your face and has a loud voice, but what would you know? You've made your own choice. Above all I wish I could get you off my mind if you would be so kind.
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