Is life really too short or maybe too long?
A journey just plucking out the strong

So much joy and tenderness with aching
With every breath, memories we are making

A child, then a wife, and finally a parent
The hardest job with long hours and nay a red cent

Spending days in front of the screen to pay the bills
Blurred vision, headaches looming with unmade meals

Guilt for the friend and wife and mother I am not
Worthy just the same for the wins that I've got

The dichotomy of life is sorrow and bliss
Short or long, it doesn't matter as neither I'll miss

In the end it was never the destination that mattered

It was our journey and memories that were the key

Instead of dreams it was glass ceilings shattered

No regrets are had by me

We did it all our way in the face of those who couldn’t see the vision

We put humans first and hearts make good choices

We fought through literal fire to accomplish our mission

And we never lost our guts or voices

I see now so clearly that we are the lucky ones

Looking back at so much more gained than lost

Living in the moment with you was the prize

Making our own rules was worth every ounce of the cost

It’s a little bit of everything that we get to hold dear

Sharing the experience with a precious few

We get to keep that compass in hearts forever near

If I had to do it all over again I would and I would choose you

In the beginning there were two young souls
Each living a lifetime before they were grown

Representing hope to the others' dreams and goals
Wounded hearts in the shadows of their own homes

The bride in a bed sheet wedding gown and a groom just 18
On their own together facing a journey unforeseen

They were judged and many counted them out
Walking in faith forward with a future in doubt

The early years came and went as their family grew
Tears of happiness arrived with joys they never knew

Life found a way facing many sorrows with mercy
They persevered bravely in the face of adversity

Despite many hardships they never gave up the fight
Forgiveness at the helm of love’s ship guided by light

The chaotic seas calmed with the hands of grace
Redemption and love intertwined like a beautiful lace

Those same souls now older, wiser still full of gratitude and care
For the their journey and family were built on hope and a prayer

We lift our glasses tonight in honor of your life together saying cheers
Mom and Dad, with all our hearts we honor your fifty years!

I breathe, I close my eyes and I drift  
I'm so happy, but still wanting to cry

Air fills my chest this is truly a gift
Bidding farewell to all that why

I open my eyes and breath again
Singing praise yet quietly screaming out

Releasing this dark aggressing bane
Grateful, now hopefully liberating doubt

In the final countdown I craved to let it all go
Setting intentions for what the New year would bestow

So hopeful and yet naïve still like a child
Sure that which is coming is calm and mild

Midnight struck to bring in a New Year
Yet the old world came the pain didn't disappear

From ourselves
From our fears
From each other
From the new frontier

History stands still, but time seems to be flying
Our world is selling a product and I'm not buying

Panic, hate and fear knocking to serve at my door
Watching others with plates out asking for more

People hungry for sorrow and thirsty for pain
Kindness, light and sensibilities lay quietly slain

The earth is on fire in every sense of the word
No answers or hope just the utterly absurd

We feel cold from the earth's suffering
Numb from the sadness and pain
Seeking warmth from a hopeful spring
Begging the universe for refrain

So much agonizing in the darkness
It's so chilly without the light
My dear ones feel the bitterness
Frozen hearts and hands from the fight

We crave a glimpse of the sunshine
A ray of calm calling our names
Seeking reprieve with the divine
Our arms lock as we approach the flames

A fire of hope and joy and peace
We warm our heart and hands
We embrace as the sorrows cease
Love thawing while light withstands

How old was I when I first looked into the mirror and wasn't enough

How old will I be when my reflection replies I'm too much

My mind feels

My heart feels

My emotions feel

Life feels

Society feels

The world feels

Everything feels

Why is your opinion the only one that matters?
So stubborn and unreasonable it causes emotional scatter

My wholesome intentions are now twisted and skewed
Is it so hard to sympathize with another point of view?

I can be two things at once rational and empathetic
Couldn't you then be sensible and sympathetic?

You don't understand, but that doesn't make me wrong
My intentions, rationale and viewpoint also belong  

Guilty for doing what I feel is right and ****** if I don't
You could just be kind and support me, but I know you won't


You say I have a choice, but I know what that means
An order of silent treatment with a side of love liens

If I'm picking battles this is not one I'm fighting to win
The victory with a punishment that doesn't match the sin

Ultimately, it isn't the end of the world if I don't get my way
Respecting my reasons are not black and white, just simply grey

Even if you can't understand the picture to see my play

I'm tired and just trying my best not to take it to the mat

This time couldn't you just respect and trust me anyway

After all these years...

Haven't I earned that?

The chaos comes in droves, when will she be free
Bad news dropping like bombs on her war-torn psyche

At every turn the pain and suffering looms
The seconds like hours, her life it consumes

It seems this storm has never ending rain
What lessons remain to release her pain

There's a hole in her heart the sorrow has left
No smiles or reprieve, her soul left bereft

She's waiting to break, fold or just slip away
I'm not giving up on her, not ever, not today

Light will re-enter and hope will remain
In her tired heart love will sustain

The rain will stop and the clouds will clear
She will regain control as peace draws near

Joy will return and the mayhem will fade
Healing will come soon, just not today

When you have a problem to which you must commit
Take a step back and just take look at it

You often can't see the forest for the trees most will admit
Things would be  easier if you would just take a look at it

When people are in chaos and throwing a fit
Why can't they take a moment to just look at it?

The power is in your hands if you would only permit
To take the blindfold off and just look at it

To love, raise and support
It takes

To cry, teach and praise
It takes

To laugh, learn and grow
It takes

To be free, survive and thrive

It takes....

Somehow you always come back into view
As I watch the dawn
My heart finds its way to you
I reach out yet you’re always gone

Just in time
But always in vein
All I ever wanted was to feel your love
or say goodbye to the pain

Let me go, say good bye. I don't want to waste another moment waiting to cry.
You hook and grip at every turn, just trying to be free
But you know every turn in front of me

I loved you because you were close
but you were always really gone
You let go for a little while, so I try to be strong

Let me go, say good bye. I don't want to waste another moment waiting to cry.
You hook and grip at every turn, just trying to be free
But you know every turn right behind me

Here I go ready to fall, away from you for me
Losing you how its supposed to be

You live here in my mind but finally I see the move
In saying goodbye I have nothing more to lose

Everything sounds better in french
On this belief I can surely rely

They have the gorgeous Pomme Frittes
While we have the boring french fry

In France a crispy, fresh and warm baguette
At my house just a mediocre loaf of regret

There is quite nothing better than a glass of French Champagne
Our domestic impostor "Sparkling Wine" isn't winning that game

Naturally to seal this case I will end with the perfect French kiss
Because a plain peck or a smooch is so much easier to dismiss

Clearly I have a sophisticated foreign thirst to quench
Mon amour, because everything sounds better in French

Thursday you've finally arrived
Work is over and I'm ready to imbibe

You've become my favorite day of week
Most of my jobs done and giving Saturday a wink

Late enough in the week to relax a little more
While Friday's shadow lurks closely under the door

Early enough to fantasize about Sunday
Yet still so far away from Monday

Pour me a glass, or two or three
Unplug my brain and help me let it be

Since I only have one more day of work
Will one more hour really hurt?

So sweet Thursday you may not be part of the weekend
But since the quarantine, it's upon you I've come to depend

Ageless little creature commanding the world with your tiny hands
Big eyes, big heart - saving the galaxy as the universe demands

I’ve had nothing, but I have it all
The best part about being down was nowhere else to fall

I’ve spent my life building a capacity for chaos
Rescuing, saving, surviving, but mostly minimizing loss

As I approach 40, my mid and half lives loom to turn the page
My confidence shrouded in self doubt is somehow still in a cage

I have more blessings than I can count yet sometimes still sad
Mostly with the undone or for the childhood I never had

The love of my life is true and all knowing
I feel warm and grateful yet baggage I’m still towing

As much as I have it together, there’s so much work to do
On the inside, the dark places starting with self-love
....a challenge anew

Walking home from school, holding  my book bag as the other kids drove by

My payless shoes and eager smile weren't enough for them to wave goodbye

We walked to the grocery store, school and church
Dreaming of a day where I could look down from their smug perch

A nerdy kid so embarrassed of my life
Wanting so badly to fit in without all the pain and strife

Lonely so many times just wanting a friend
With parents so perplexing, so rigid never willing to bend

No car, no fun, no hope, no bed
No home, no money, no rest, no bread

Now I walk for fun, for exercise for peace
Ironically I walk away the sorrow-each step a release

Love is supposed to win
Yet why do so many give up, give in?
When it comes to marriage does our capacity for life grow or shrink?
When we are with our soul mate standing at the brink
Are we growing or are we fading?
The percentages say don't even try
Just give up when there are no solutions to sell or buy
Because I realize that life with you is the prize
Getting the honor to see myself in someone else's eyes
Shouldn't it be harder to love you after all this time?
It's gotten easier and I am not quite sure why
As we watch our little selves grow
I wonder is this the type of love they'll seek or bestow
Was this really ever so hard? Am I forgetting the heavy times?
Or was life always easier with you in it?
Living freer without disguise
Hurdles feel like pebbles with you by my side
In your love still now and forever my soul will abide

Have I been asleep in a dream full of toil?
Laboring to grow, trudging, but never watering the soil

Years spent clawing and grasping at straws
Never really growing, never really fighting while authority broke laws

So absorbed with existence and future opportunity
Never stopping to think about my earthly community

People are suffocating and dying and with every breath I wonder
How many more lives need to be lost, left squandered in the gutter?

As I watch the images all around me of lives yearning to be free
How is there still this much sorrow and still so many in need?

Looking back maybe it was not sleep, but rather twilight
Consumed with rest and survival, never understanding other’s bigger fight

Just being complacent now after all this rage seems like a sin
There is no going back, there is no rest, but where do I begin

In twilight the stories felt far like bad dreams, but in the end not my own
As bad as life was, my heartache and suffering was still from a throne

As I fully wake I pray the world repents away the shame
With so much hate around us that every dead soul has no name

As this twilight fades may I have a voice for those with none
May the clueless open their eyes compelled to save every mother’s son

As I awaken my spirit to see the pain and injustice
Will those lost souls continue to be hate’s accomplice?

As I hear the masses call out beckoning for equality
May the world hear the audible heartbeat of humanity

The slumber is over and the twilight retired
Leaving only room for justice, love and hope’s burning fire

May we lift each beautiful soul up in glory wrapping their ancestors in light
As statues fall and voices are lifted for justice there can be no sleep not even twilight