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Apr 2019 · 102
i.
honey Apr 2019
i.
my thick thighs spread wide
i place my head between them
and heave out my pain
i'm still angry that i can't cry but if i push it, like many other things, it won't come
Dec 2018 · 168
closure story op 1
honey Dec 2018
These days you feel like a burden in my heart
Your mere image is now foreign
Pagan and
Obscene
I cannot bare to face you
I cannot bare to carry this weight alone
It's been days
Weeks
Your presences lingers
Unfaltering-
Never wavering
Refusing to
Drift away
Fade away from
My memories.
I cannot cry it away
I occasionally shed dry tears
I cannot eat it away
You eat at me-
Tear a pit into my stomach
I cannot starve it away
My cheeks hallow and i see your sunken in smile blinking back at me
One year later and its still cant bear to say it aloud or even think it in my head. I'm selectively deaf, completely mute- because I can't bear to acknowledge what happened to you.
Nov 2017 · 406
windowside
honey Nov 2017
light filtered through blinds
incandescent and sunny
paints her mocha skin
May 2017 · 513
That Tree that Stood Tall
honey May 2017
That tree that stood tall...
 
Years of knowledge ingrained in its ligaments...
(Numerously choked by its own rings)
 
I still see our carvings...
(The haunting scars imbedded deep into the bark and our memories.)
 
Hieroglyphic memorials for our first everything...
(The dates of which things died.)

The knot furled into its center...
(Forget-me-nots decaying at its very roots.)
 
Do you remember?
(How hard was it to forget?)
May 2017 · 1.4k
5.6.17 A minute til 10
May 2017 · 533
4.3.17 12:00
honey May 2017
"I Love You"s melted

Under my tongue 'til you were

Yet bitter nostalgia,

Yet the feeling of emptiness

Yet the absence of memories

Yet the memories of absence.


Let the shadow of those two petals rest

And rim a mirage over my lips.

Let that serve as a reminder of the venom behind every kiss.

Let me accept the reality that you mean me no good.

That I should’ve stopped when I still could.


Take heed that I want more.

Take to heart I’m too vulnerable to make these kinds of decisions.

Take pity that I’m too submissive to threaten your position.

Take this kiss as a final blow.

As a signature of defeat.

This coup d’etat

The last draw in heat.
May 2017 · 1.5k
Contingency
honey May 2017
Off on a tangent
My fingers in transient
Clasping and clutching
sensing and touching-
While they still can,
Before our crossroads split
And exigency omits
That peculiar feeling of familiarity
And all absconds that impression of clarity
Then it is goodbye
With all relics of that high
All remnants of our contingence
Because our futility is insistent
May 2017 · 461
Kyoko's Law of Subtraction
May 2017 · 456
Nursery Rug
honey May 2017
Threadbare tapestry
Spreading dust and memories
Unravels slowly
May 2017 · 446
EVE
honey May 2017
EVE
Dear Eve,
The beat of my heart
The gasp and sigh of my lungs
The conversation hid under my tongue
You are my passion.
My everlasting light.
The promise of dawn that pacifies me through night.

Eve,
I am nothing without you.
I am nothing without the balm of your fragrance,
The compassion of your embrace.
The warmth of your smile.


Eve,
You carried my burdens on your back
You bared the weight of the world
You birthed my sorrow and pain
I bled and drained you for my gain.

Eve,
Will you stay by my side?
Will you promise?

Eve,
Will you smile once more?
Do I deserve solace?

Eve,
Forgive me.
I welcome my fate.
But I can’t accept yours.
May 2017 · 952
The Condition of the Voyeur
honey May 2017
I like your crooked teeth.
And how they taunt me.
Bothering and provoking.
Unwinding me slowly.
Sharp and angled precariously like church steeples.
Blasphemous teeth.
And how they subdue me.
A smile that mocks my desire.
One that makes me feel unworthy.
Unmatched and unwanted.
And I fantasize our first kiss
We are one centimeter apart
Spirits connected through heart
A mess of heavy syncopated breaths
The vibrating pulse under the mass of your *******
Tempting liquid lips
Languid and flowing like liquor above a cup
We are sloppy and missing the curves of the rim
The air becomes a target for every tantric touch
The proximity Thick With Our Invisible Lust
My eyes scale the jagged curves of your frame
Hands feigning and groping and stuttering like staccato
You tremble under my caress with much vibrato.
And you are mine.
Except in reality,
you won't spare me a second of your time.
May 2017 · 398
Kyoko's Tea
honey May 2017
“I Love You”s melted
Under my tongue ‘til you were
Bitter nostalgia
honey May 2017
I regard my attraction to language as an affair,
as a withstanding relation,
a product of indecorous communication.
This devotion has demanded a life of its own,
accepting my whole as its proxy.
Others won't understand this affinity.
They aren't familiar with the curving lilt of a domestic tongue,
Nor the taste of a verse fermented in the mouths of one's ancestors,
Surely not the stuttering moans of a mother dialect,
Yet the sharp sting of a jagged vernacular,
or the mastery and art behind the articulation of a single utterance.
This discourse developed over time,
I required maturation and growing before my notions aligned.
I felt eager upon observing the pervasive movements of great text
Which delivered a high known greater than ***.
It is true that I contemplated profoundly first,
before committing my desire and will to the whole of verse.
But now that my diction reflects the appeal of great literature and enamoring fiction
I couldn't be more satisfied.
May 2017 · 579
Living with Racism
honey May 2017
My house is made of cards and glass
a frame of sticks and straw
a base of mud
a roof of tin

I am confined to these four corners
defined by the paint peeling from the walls
the veil of glass shards under my feet
pricking me like little needles

Pungent and fetid
it's radiating from the carpet
heat seeking and
desperate to invade my senses

Lead chipping from the ceiling-
the ceiling might cave in
The roof may realize it can longer shield me
It cannot hold my burdens, any longer

The thin walls might falter
might waver against the loud noise
the forte of shouting and yelling
It’s all subject to collapse

The windows cracked
like veins
Shattered church mosaics
that open to the little light that never shines

I cannot breathe in these cramped quarters
in the dark of my basement
in the cell of a prison
in the bowels of a slave ship

I am suffocated from every angle
until I can’t breathe
until I am no longer happy
nor welcome in my own home

I am on the cusp of eviction
in a situation that for once cannot be solved through diction
These walls talk for me
as I still struggle around the lyrics of my Harlem fiction

I cannot step outside the front door
though I try so hard I am always trapped
I am convinced I can’t make it outside these walls
the same walls that crowd and constrict

The price of living has become unreasonable
My indentured wages cannot pay these bills
I’m desperate and cutting deals
These walls will tumble any second

My pride has long since crumbled

I stay-
squalering in the filth and debris
because I fear I do not deserve anything greater

I stay-
choking around my pride
because I feel I am not equal

I stay-
decaying in poverty
because I have always settled for less

— The End —