Slithering around my organs, twisting in my chest,
Fire-breathing on my soul, in my mind it makes a nest,
Roses of faceted scales, glitter on its spine,
Intoxication like red wine, I can’t resist their shine,
I bite my tongue, hold back the words,
In dreams I might speak out, but smoke and steam have filled my throat,
I can’t hold back a shout.

Search me out, look for me sweetly,
My heart is not hard to find, I’ll gladly give you hints,
If only you take the first steps toward me,
No matter how much I like you, I won’t stay here
If you don’t try, solve my mystery,
Draw me out, and see my colors,
Or you’ll never see my beauty.

I slept on waves of time
Green sand swirled around my head,
My soul was spun by the strongest of hands,
And wind swept under my bed,
I heard music from a thousand wings,
Being borne here by sparkling grace,
From it my mind softly swings,
And my heart gently shakes.

I love rain,
Bask in it, Bathe in it, shake in it,
Yesterday I danced in it.
Martie watched me,
Took a break from football,
Screamed when I saw her,
Haha, then I ran up the hill.
Laid in it, wade in it,
Get rid of my jade in it.

Someday I'll move,
To the desert,
And miss it,
Or to the rainforest,
And get sick of it
Better soak in all I can now

You call out dreams within me
Like pulling out folded saris
from boxes waiting on attic space
Colors I’d almost forgotten
come tumbling down like a rainbow waterfall of fabrics
I long to drape them again
and walk my own adventures

I lay on the pyre
burning . . .
bleeding . . .
longing for my flesh to be finished
completely stripped away
Sometimes pouring is preceded by drilling
And joy so thrilling interspersed by lengths of crying
burning . . .
bleeding . . .
whispering away the trauma of old or newer lies
my Lover hears my cries
and calls me on to sing it all

Strength is written in scars on his body
It's evidence shows on his face
though life tried to steal from you beauty
and you came close to having to taste
Death
Life is something you conquered
and your legs now are thick for the race
Those that you've helped number many
and your currency is the Lord's grace

it's over
I say
it's over
I cry
it's over
I smile
it's over
I weep
it's over

My heart is a golden garden
Full blown roses
tight little buds
of oranges
Pinks and Rosy reds

my favorite purple hues
Each one opened at the subtle cues
of careful human touch

Each friend has opened their own treasured flower
a monument, a bright colored tower
to a love that will span through the ages of life
bringing light to my garden
even at night

It’s been so long since my heart was so dangerously close to being exposed
upon the catwalk that is called connection
It frightens me
but whispers of peace have become my food
As I gently coax my heart into the open
I’m relieved to find I’m no longer paralyzed
nor terrified
nor am I too desperate for love
that I would quickly accept a fool

It’s Cold!
Giggles,  
There’s nerves on my feet!
Water on my toes, hot sun on my head,
Tell me tales of river beasts, to chill the blood of mothers

My hand is cramped
the muscles and skin begin to meld
with the smooth hilt of a sword
I grip but know not how to swing

I didn’t know I could scare so easily,
That I was flighty,
While claiming to be steadfast,
So quick to turn aside,
To run away,
At a greeting given joyfully,
Fear has gripped my heart,
Masquerading in the form of weariness,
Of you,
Am I afraid for myself?
Or do I fear for you?

I win
I’m free
I’m proud of me

I’m a lover in a white blazer
Rocking rose pink shades
I’m surrounded by people with ***** hands
and I have no ability to discern the grime of lovers palms
until they’ve brushed over me enough to drown out the cold scars
and I see new stains over my heart

You’re so black and white
when I look at you
Like a creative charcoal canvas
like exquisite dot work
like the shades and shadows of a skeleton
You show me the world is still beautiful without color

A poem is a breath
that two people who have never met
can share

Lately I've been thinking of
dipping myself in paint and throwing myself on a canvas
Every epithelial particle leaving its own mark
But I cannot place my every cell in colors
for most lie underneath my skin and in the dark

Lately I've been thinking of writing out all the words I know
the ones better than "thing"
shocking sentiment in shaking sentences
But I cannot write forever to encompass my whole being

No splash of colors can express me . . .
No never ending line of diction could . . .
Make Me Known

Was there ever an instant in time
When I wasn't in your mind?
Every piece of DNA and RNA
In full breath and 3D meaning
Along with every word I speak?
Did you think of me
at the parting of the Red Sea?
When everyone thinks You would have been preoccupied
Am I in Your every moment
My blue and purple hues stretching further than a canvas of the sky?
if there are moments for You
El Roi!
The God Who Sees Me
I am ever in Your sights
You smile with each sigh

I was formed in power
Adam began in dust
I was breathed through bone
He recognizes himself in me
Yet cannot understand the change
Or his great need for the strength I bring
I’m his most important friend

Like a fragile bird
I could easily forget my wings
looking for warm arms to carry me
When I should be taking off
putting faith in warm air
and the strength in me

For a moment you flew for me,
And my eyes reflected your light,
For one glistening, glorified moment,
I couldn’t have loved you more,
There you danced, with your words on display
I cried, My Hero! but now in dismay
Fallen you are, and fallen you were,
Why did you hurt me this way?
I can’t say there weren’t warnings,
I won’t say I was sure,
But I adored you,
And staked much on your words.
Your Poetry soothed me,
Took me to great Height!
Does it now lie with you in the dust?
No, perhaps not.
For truth is Truth, and art,
Art.
My heart cries for a true Daniel!
A Poet of Integrity!
My heart will rest in David, King
David.
My first inspiration, my first Poet Hero!
May my heart seek like Yours, and Never Stop!
Never!

Oh!
Oh, oh, oh!
But my heart Bleeds!
For the soul of a man I loved,
And his Godly diamonds.
I will never look on them in the same way,
What is their meaning now?

Psalm 119:136
“Streams of tears flow from my eyes,
    for your law is not obeyed.”

When the leaves turn gold
I stand in joyous awe

When branches become bald
dread creeps in to the raven's caw

I feel the Red Oak's scarlet kiss
turn like death upon my lips

When every year my confidence slips
that I will see bright life in this
Remind me that green comes back
That verdant veins will run wild again
the dry earth will not crumble away
before spring rains sweep in to quench the brown decay

It comes back
Life always comes back

all that becomes old
will be restored
will be renewed

I want to see myself as perfect,
But the truth is,
I fall very short,
Being better than some is never good enough,
And I tend to ignore my faults,
Too lazy to spit the poison out,
It wouldn’t be too hard to change,
But I parade my strengths,
In a chain,
That becomes costume jewelry,
When treated as all I am.
My paper heart crumples,
Under the weight of this shame,
Quicker than it burns,
In the flames from my cheeks,
Nothing is unforgiven,
And no one can judge you for your struggle,
For who can say yours is worse than mine?
My voice croaks and dies,
In the effort to speak my sin,
And my head falls back,
Unable to rise and pronounce,
For I know my brothers will not forgive,
As my Master does.
As I have been guilty countless times,
In the same overbearing spirit,
Forgetting the weakness of the soul,
My own heart’s love of the forbidden,
And secret feedings on decadence.


Sins are meant to be accepted,
As what they really are,
Not hidden, nor flaunted
For there is no guilt is Christ,
Rise and rejoice,
Knowing you are free,
For the Lord is with you now,
He is able to keep you from falling,
Though you fall again,
You are not lost.

Hey baby,
let's make this into love,
it will never work, but we might as well try
I'm bored with this life

Look down
far down, down, down
into the canyon of my being
and wonder at the rainbows
splashing in the stream

take this hour
and perhaps the next
to memorize the grand duress
of English words spread east to west

I have destroyed whole worlds today
the stench of burning cities fills my nostrils
Quiet agony fills my throat
Endless wreckage is my vision
What horrors my hands have wrought
I step upon the ruined ramparts
I weep upon the ashes

I do not have the power to do such things
so few ripples have I truly brought
And yet my anxious heart feels like its caught
caught and shackled in the dry dust of emotional failure

With a sky so bright
My eyes should be brighter
With a world so wide
My heart should feel wider
With a life so light
My heart should be lighter

When I'm not writing,
I have the terrible feeling,
That I do not have feeling,
And can no longer write

And what you’re telling me
would mean so much
if I cared
even a little

What is it like,
And what shall I compare it to?
Is it like when you find the perfect shoes, but can’t afford them?
Or read the perfect book, and the sequel is never written, even though they promised?
It’s like that before you forget it,
Before someone else comes along,
Or you find that those shoes really aren’t that great, not a good fit,
Those perfect words turn ugly in your mind, and you keep on searching.
But I haven’t forgotten, or discovered something distasteful,  
I’m still hoping, longing, admiring,
Praying for a miracle, waiting for someone else.

I opened myself to desire
And it’s wings swept me away

what a bitter taste is left in my mouth!
The knowledge I had a hand in this poison does little to draw it out
not one thing remains to be missed
Not a word
not a syllable
not a kiss
I’ve heard the lingering flavor of lust
More than merely resembles Disgust
But I hate to consider my love to be Dust

In wisdom God has said
To be warm, you need a friend

The closest hearts, the greater heat

oh, observe!
How the greatest hindrances of Love
are yet it’s greatest spotlights
A wall of resistance
must in the end be consumed in flames
And like giant ***** of gas mysteriously ignite
to become our stars
Roaring walls become lights along the path of our journey
Inward and Outward

Anyone
can rhyme,
But only
we,
Bleed
words
on paper

Do you love me? I long to scream.
The answer rips through my conscience
and shrapnel drops from a broken heart
into a bitter stomach.
But the effects are not as bad as they could be,
For patience is a virtue that I don’t declare as vain
I won’t let myself go, or wain,
Too far, too fast, not completely broken, conscious
Yet.

I study then forget, I hear and then
Am lost in sounds of beating drums,
Hearing only lies of my desolation,
I no longer ponder on your Comfort,
Or exquisite providence,
Slip on ice of loneliness, and my mouth begins to drip,
My own blood, slow and drying.
Hardening words and dulling eyes,
Replace the golden energy of Love,
And the brightness of sweetness’ line.
Waning arms, once strong in your power,
Only wreck more havoc in my body,
Crying foul at every cell, and accepting depression,
In the cradle of my mind.
I walk in gray forests ,
Rocking pain in my arms,
Believing you want me to feel this,
Alone,
When this is not what You Want,
But to carry me through, holding me next to your heart,
Rocking me as my feelings echo your own, and your tears mirror mine,
For sorrow is not alien to You, but pierces your soul,
It does not take the toll, of years and bruises,
To make misshapen bodies, but rolls against me like a rock,
And polishes to a godly shine, as you stroke me with your fingers.
I will always be a favored child, called to rest upon your lap,
Regardless of what chased me there, or what tears at my skin,
Calling out the trouble of life.
For a Tower does not turn away, a refugee of certain plights,
But welcomes all who run.

I’ve seen my inner lady
dressed in long, flowing organzas
she’s standing on the edge of sea cliffs
or the middle of empty, rolling hills
while pastel clouds flow past her legs
and pain ripples her hair
I think my soul feels stuck
like legs locked in position
almost exposed in sheer fabrics
the touch of sorrow has softened to a breeze
but endlessly caresses my being
beauty brushes my fingertips
and wraps around my torso
but it’s like passing petals on the wind
nothing enters in deeper

The sun sparkles
And illuminates,
The glass edge,
Of my soul,
Vibrating with life.
The rising pitch of surrounding voices,
Conducted by my own,
Melts it razer thin,
Threatening to shatter,
And scatter,
Into many fragments.
I forget to stop and measure,
The damage I have done,
I could see,
If I paused,
That the golden lines are always longer,
Spinning consistently out,
Strong enough to hold,
Despite the holes.

I’ve never looked out
and saw a man
who looked like all he wanted was affection
I’ve never looked out and saw
a heart I thought I might enjoy
but eventually break
because I think I need more than affection
I need a twin
a friend
a thousand times before I need a lover
That kid is beautiful
Hey
But he’s not calling me higher

Scrolling down the colored screen
As if your life was better than mine
I miss . . .
I wish . . .
I ache inside
not for the return of another time
but for the people I've left behind

Food Matters
“A pill for every ill”
Til they cover every sill,
When will,
This stop?
Too many synthetics,
Too many extracts,
Buried in white powder,
My mouth burns,
And my stomach bleeds,
My energy is robbed,
And my joy slips away,
When I cannot focus on my people,
And my sun.
True,
God’s joy transcends all ills,
But he created us to thrive,
Apart from drugs,
To play in all his paint,
And laugh with the universe.
Eat,
Even clean dirt can be better,
Than the plastic covered,
Microwavable,
Sculpture of food in your pantry.

Why is it when I see the ocean
I cry?
I laugh?
I dance?
I overflow with exuberance?
I feel like I am home again?
It’s as if I see my sister
my soul
my dearest love
and she laughs
and cries
and dances with me