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2.6k · Jan 2016
My Victorious King
Ysabel Jan 2016
I was a hopeless wanderer when we met,
My eyes were swollen from last night's tears, while Yours smiles from ear to ear,
I dont even remember if I knew you personally back then but you knew that I'm one of your lost daughters.

You crossed the space between us and offered Your hand,
You wipe my tears away and made me smile,
You said I should not fear because I have you now,
And you were right, things are better when You're in my side.

For years I tried to ask the what ifs,
But the truth is I should have started asking what is,
What is life without Your love and grace?
What is world without Your presence in any place?

It may take time before we truly meet,
But I thank you for everything.
You've been kind through out my life,
You've been loving that I cant even thank you enough.

Let me then praise You and worship You,
For when my heart was on pieces, you picked them and glued them together,
Not for me to love somebody again but for me to Love You more each day My Victorious King.
God is my King.
Ysabel Jun 2017
I saw you staying late at night,
in your small dark room
staring at your ceiling
asking for answers.

That day, I saw you getting anxious
at your office around nine.
'Coz your hot headed Boss yelled at you
because you failed to send invites.

Yet I know you did your best,
staying behind just to finish
the letters, the inputs,
the programs even the script.

The bags in your eyes get bigger every night,
While you cram to send it all.
Your eyes get watery, you become jitty,
But no one knew because you accepted the call.

I saw all your hardworks.
I saw all you pains.
I heard all the belittlings.
I heard all your pleas and cries.

Yet despite all these,
You're still here fighting.
Finishing the fight you've started.

The rope is no longer hanging,
Those blades are now kept.

To the girl who thought of death lately,
I salute you for being brave!
Live life despite how hard it may seem.
1.6k · Nov 2017
Inay
Ysabel Nov 2017
Ang aming salita ay unti unti nang naglalaho.
Ang mga karanasan noong unang panahon ay hindi na nababasa.
Ang mga masining na kultura´t tradisyon ay mistulang larawan na lamang ng nakaraan.
Ang mga masasayang okasyon ay isa na lamang pangarap.

Ang lahat ng ito ay nawala sa pagdating ng bago, Inay.
Pilit ka man nilang palitan, ang dugo mo pa rin ang nananalaytay sa amin.
Ang pagkaPilipino ay hinding hindi mapapalitan gaano man karaming lenggwahe, kagamitan o oportunidad ang dumating.
Ako ay titindig at magsasalita pa rin ng lenggwaheng aking ipagmamalaki saanman sa mundo.
Para sayo aking Inang Pilipinas, kami ay aasenso nang hindi nakakalimut sa nakaraan.
1.3k · Feb 2018
Caught
Ysabel Feb 2018
Have you ever felt different?
That you are slowly sinking to a void you cannot resist.
That you are leaning to a wall that slowly crumbles from within.

Have you ever felt lost?
That whatever direction you take you just keep going to the same place.
That no matter how long you seemed you´ve walked on, you still can´t go far.

Have you ever felt dead?
Because this is what I feel right now.
I'm caught in a void that ***** me,
I'm caught in a path I can´t walk on.
I feel dead, I feel nothing at all
1.3k · Jan 2016
Sweet Notes to him 1
Ysabel Jan 2016
They say once you fell in love,
he will be your world,
but they were wrong
because when I fell with you,
you have become my universe.
1.3k · Jan 2016
Poet's vision
Ysabel Jan 2016
Three months from now I could be in my chair typing,
Three months from now I could be in a room teaching
Three months from now I could be in the road doing interview,
Or three months from now I could be in your arms saying I do.

There are endless possibilities that could happen,
But before that three months finally end,
Let me first savor my last college year,
Typing a poem while drinking a beer.
Three months to go!!!
922 · May 2016
Eargasm
Ysabel May 2016
Hush darling,
Don't moan out loud.
Tell when to stop this,
Tell when you had enough.

Like that darling,
Tap the table but not too hard.
Feel the rhythm,
Dance  the beat.

Because this won't end soon,
before you knew it.
Music is everything.
919 · Dec 2015
Don't you dare
Ysabel Dec 2015
Don't you dare to desert a poet,
Her words will haunt you down.
Don't you dare to hurt a poet,
Her words will stab you 'til you're gone.
Don't you dare to change a poet,
Her words will just echo around.
Just don't dare to date a poet,
If you don't mean to keep her in your arms.
874 · Nov 2017
Pangako
Ysabel Nov 2017
Patawad Inay sa walang pakundangang pagsuway sa iyong mga pinaguutos,
Sa walang kagatol-gatol na pagsumbat sa bawat pangaral,
Sa walang lamas na pagwaldas sa mga pinaghirapan niyong salapi,
At sa patuloy na pakikipagkaibigan sa mga kaaway.

Ako,
kami,
ay hindi na nakikinig,
hindi na natututo mula sa mga nangyari noong pahanon mo,
mula sa mga karanasang hindi mo malilimutan.

Kaya´t Inay sa susunod na mga taon ay sisikapin ko, sa tulong ng aking mga kapatid, ng aking mga kaibigan na patuloy na nagtitiwala sa akin, ay babaguhin ko ang aming bansa. Kami ay magiging radikal upang ang pagbabagong ito ay hindi masayang at maging isang panaginip lamang.
836 · Jan 2016
Sweet lies from him 2
Ysabel Jan 2016
You told me that we will lasts,
But we didn't,
you lied,
Because the moment you said hello
It was already a goodbye.
Expectation hurts more than reality.
798 · Jan 2016
Break Free
Ysabel Jan 2016
Im starting to drown myself with works that I've been doing for so long.
And every time I fail you're always there to remind me how stupid I am.
I only want to succeed and be the woman I've dreamt to become,
But I know in your eyes all my hardwork were and never be enough.

I want to scream as loud as I can just for me not to hear your voice anymore.
Your words that tells me what to do and your mad face I'm afraid to stare.
I want to be free from the grip of your expectations,
For I just want to live my life as strong yet carefree.

So if you're reading this I want you to hear me out,
Listen to what my hearts shouts even for once.
Give me the air that was stolen from me to breathe,
And just be happy for everybody including me.

My loving self, free me from your past.
Break the chain that keeps me in your arms.
Let me wander a different path,
For us to have a better life- away from people's expectations and wrath.
Your self is your biggest enemy
703 · Mar 2016
the art of procrastination
Ysabel Mar 2016
Blink
Type
Erase.
Type
Type
Type
Erase.
Checks the time..
Type,
Erase!!!!
Search Google,
Copy,
Paste,
Edit,
Save,
Upload.
Smile.
693 · Dec 2015
Let me take the blame
Ysabel Dec 2015
Let me take the blame of not doing what I need to do,
The time that I should have said goodbye but opted not to,
The time that I just counted cars with different hue,
And the time that I didn’t choose who’s better between them and You.

Let me take the blame of being vulnerable.
For letting my feelings be seen by everyone in the hall,
For giving them the glimpse to look at my permanent hole,
And for surrendering for You at the very last goal.

Let me take the blame of all the injustices.
All the tears of families for their lost father’s kisses.
All the wives who grieves for their husband’s wrongful deceases,
And all the dreams we planned that now slowly ceases.

Let me take the blame of being prideful,
Moments that were passed to ask for forgiveness and be mindful,
Moments to set aside self-reservations and be humble,
And moments to let go dreams and believe that Your plan is more beautiful.

Let me take it even for the last time,
Feel the pain that You’ve bare and make it mine.
Because I know that You’ve been there for me till the end of line,
Watching and taking the blame so that I can be fine.
he is too good that he takes the pain we should have felt.
684 · Jun 2016
Forgotten Promise
Ysabel Jun 2016
I won't
let myself
fall for
you again,
I guess.
Ysabel Apr 2016
If
three years
is
difficult,
this year
i'll be
STRONGER.
638 · Aug 2016
Unknown farewell
Ysabel Aug 2016
"Paint me yellow," was the weirdest line i got from you.

"I like my egg as raw," was the silliest prank you've ever thrown.

"People cry, so let's laugh," was the best advice i got from you.

"Dont come looking for me," was the line that i didnt see coming.

because with the endless things i learn to know about you,
you just left me with a letter,
with no words,
no letters,
just our last picture taken this summer.
When memories are all you got.
625 · Dec 2015
Disappointments
Ysabel Dec 2015
'I promise'
Said the girl whose words are lies
"This time I can"
Said the boy who's afraid to try,
"It is too late?"
Said the woman who's always behind time,
"I love you"
Said the man whose heart can never be mine.
617 · Jan 2016
Maybe Im afraid
Ysabel Jan 2016
I want to shout until my ears hurt.
I want to curse until I ran out of words.
I want to run until I can't stand on my feet.
I want to stab myself until I can no longer breathe.

I want to be back to my own self,
I want to be free.
But everytime I try.
I can feel your hands' tight grip.

I've been depressed for three years now.
I've been suffering for sleepless nights.
I've been seeking for help a lot of times,
But no one dared to notice my cry.

They knew me as a strong girl,
The one who always smile.
But this time I know I'm afraid.
Afraid of what I can do to myself.
I really need help. I can't even understand myself. I think I'll turn crazy any moment from now.
608 · Dec 2015
The h(one)y that got away
Ysabel Dec 2015
I wish I didn't knew about you and your best friend,
I wish I haven't seen the message you've sent,
I wish I saved my heart, to you I  didn't lend,
'Coz you just want to break hearts- to be in trend.

I'm sorry if I was cold,
The words you wanted to hear i didn't told,
I wish I was brave enough, too bold,
For when this day comes I won't loose hold.

If one day to will find me,
In the same place where we celebrated our anniversary,
Don't be sad nor sorry,
Because this might take time but I'm sure I will soon be happy.
559 · Dec 2015
The connoisseur's rune
Ysabel Dec 2015
Let the artist's thought embrace the night,
As he scribble it all till dawn;
For words are enough to end a fight.

Bagged with pens and clearest sight,
He wandered the world alone;
Let the artist's thought embrace the night.

Inspired by the beauty of colors and light,
He described the majestic throne;
For words are enough to end a fight.

To give everyone what is just and right,
He painted it with for hone;
Let the artist's thought embrace the night.

Aiming to share a peaceful flight,
He uttered in the loudest sone;
For words are enough to end a fight.

Striving for future's height,
Dreaming for a joyful tone,
Let the artist's thought embrace the night,
For words are enough to end a fight.
Night is the best time to write for poets
559 · Jun 2016
Sonnet to Dee
Ysabel Jun 2016
Standing before the dusk had arrive,
Waiting for the dark to come and subside,
Remembering the pains before I dive,
And your memories left me as my guide.
I can still smell the fragrance of yours,
The beat of your heart I still hear it's boom,
Your smile and chuckle are my golds,
Gives me strength to fights in every storm.
But now that I am alone in the dark,
Sitting at one corner that I've been cried,
Hearing your voice and the dogs howled and bark,
Then I saw our picture, though sad I tried,
To forget everything even your eyes,
But I can't I want you to be back 'gain.
A five year old poem. I made this when I was still in junior high.
527 · Jun 2016
White lies
Ysabel Jun 2016
You were my sun,
that lit my life.
But you are the same sun,
that blinds me up.
He change. He moved on. Yet, I'm still here stuck on the idea of us.
517 · Dec 2017
Dilemma
Ysabel Dec 2017
When you finally find a job that is decent, that pays quite enough and you love but your body betrays you, weakens you, and sabotage your dream.

Will you continue working despite the sleepless yet satisfying days? Or will you quit and listen to your body?
Its hard you know. I need an advice
514 · Jun 2016
Dreams
Ysabel Jun 2016
Know
that
One
day,
it
will
be
worth
the
fight.
Dont give up on your dreams.
498 · Mar 2016
The monster within
Ysabel Mar 2016
Hush now my darling,
dry thy tears,
silent your whimpers,
for the monster is near.

Don't scream if you hear its footsteps,
try not to breathe.
Think of your happy thoughts,
and count 'til three.

Smile now my darling,
you're already safe.
You don't need to worry.
nor ask for any help.

Look around my darling,
the monster is now lying.
soaked with your blood,
while smiling from ear to ear.
The biggest enemy that we fear is our own reflection, our own shadow, our own SELF.
493 · May 2016
Casting Magic
Ysabel May 2016
You might be wondering how you craft your poems,
Or how your hand paint endless songs,
What matters most is what you've got,
To make your readers cry then laugh.
A tribute to Simon and Baz because I got too much Simon Snow in me.
471 · Dec 2015
Am I?
Ysabel Dec 2015
Am I selfish If I say
I want you to be near?
Am I selfish if I pleads
choose me and not her?
Am I selfish if I pray
for another chance together?
Am I selfish if this leads
to your break up but to our forever?
406 · Sep 2017
Mom
Ysabel Sep 2017
Mom
Home is not home,
if you're gone...
A sad loss for us. We will miss you Aunt Bernadette.
387 · Feb 2016
Life and its meanings
Ysabel Feb 2016
People used to tell life is amazing,
But they never told me how hard to have one.

People used to tell life is full of surprises,
But they never told me that some are not worth the price.

People used to tell life is a roller coaster,
But they never told me what to do when you reached the end.

People used to tell enjoy life to the fullest.
But I never did until I was running out too late.
Enjoy every moment you have.
374 · May 2016
Why we are writing
Ysabel May 2016
To defy our existence,
In this mundane world,
We need to write
With no fear and rights.

To found our voice
In every song,
We need to cry
With words and tone.

To be drown in our emotions,
Inspite of support groups,
We need to be free
From people we cannot see.

More than wanting to disappear
In between of classes,
I write,
To keep my sanity.
371 · Jun 2016
Doctor's Advice
Ysabel Jun 2016
I wake up this morning
with a loud **** in my heart.
I slowly caress it but it won't stop
and it feels more heavy than before.

I went to the mirror and see if it has hole.
But it just my body and nothing more.
I continue to caress it but it won't stop
and it feels heavier than the last.

I called my doctor and ask for his help,
but he just laugh at me and said,
'Don't worry ysa, its not a heart attack,
Your heart is just beating for someone,
And it seems you didn't notice
you're already falling in love.'
One of my ideas of confession.
368 · May 2016
Little Castle
Ysabel May 2016
In the vastness of Internet
I found myself,

In a small corner where no one thought exists.

It had my heart, my thoughts, my words scribbling on their own.

Sharing, narrating the fears and forgotten roles.

It may be in verse with rhyming and measure,

Or just a hundred word ***** with no pressure.

But whatever it is,
I wouldn't dare to run no more,
For I have found my secret home.
Big thanks hellopoetry!
336 · Dec 2015
Pillow
Ysabel Dec 2015
Let me hold you,
Let me feel your warmth while it still lasts.
Let me cry out how awful my day went,
from the two hours delay due to traffic to tons of paper works in the office.
And how I missed a lunch meeting because of a mishap in the site.
Yet let me dry my tears first before my sleepiness takes me away,
And believe in the idea
that you will always be there for me, hugging me so tight at night
331 · May 2016
My last request
Ysabel May 2016
Take a step,
Don’t be afraid to fall.
Go, move forward,
And don’t look back.

No, you did!
Why did you look back?
Is it not that simple?
‘coz we’re back again to square one.

Move a little.
Do not hesitate to walk.
Plunge into things that make you happy.
Jump to your shadow’s reality.

That’s it, but more!
Run and never stop.
Please do not stop and look back.
Forget me—your past—your dreadful past.
307 · Sep 2017
Break it
Ysabel Sep 2017
It's thursday and you just want this week to end,
You're tired, you want to sleep, yet you still have things to send.

Your Mom called you, you didn't answer.
Your boss yelled at you, it didn't matter.

You finally got home and ate dinner,
You suddenly felt alone and bitter:

Your ex is now married,
Your best friend will have kids.

You're now thirty but seems like you still don't have a lead,
on how you'll live your life, on how you'll be free.

The clock ticks at midnight,
you put on your PJs,
you close you eyes and pray,
'One day I'll break this bubble, I'll be happy and free. I'll no longer be alone, for I will live the life I long to see.'
Break from anxiety
303 · Mar 2016
Silhouette
Ysabel Mar 2016
Don't let me shutter from your grip.
Don't let me melt from your warmth.
Just let me feel how to be touched,
before the light take me back.
Always cease every moment before you regret it.
302 · Mar 2016
Options
Ysabel Mar 2016
Years ago, I would put up a white flag instead of fighting back.

Years ago, I would make a toasted cheese instead of my favorite.

But that moment in a lift, a night in December, I knew my heart turned cold.

That my once favorite name that I always whisper, is now the one that  I despise.

For that "you count on me" line, turned to "don't try to ask me back."
299 · Jan 2019
Leader’s wage
Ysabel Jan 2019
You’ll seat in your chair feeling all their eerie disappointments, high expectations and endless rants.
You’ll see them laughing and having fun at your wide window.
You’ll hear them talking about you, other people, the office.
You’ll begin to feel small, dizzy and worthless.
You’ll beg the wall not to squeeze you hard because you cannot breathe anymore.
You’ll beg your laptop not to scream memories and endless list of failures that he witnessed.
You’ll beg your mind to stop reminding you of your faults, of your wrong decisions.
But a knock on the door will save you. A small talk from the people who laughs at you will make you calm.
You’ll act nothing is happening.
You’ll act as if you do not care
Then you’ll repeat this until you cannot breathe... at last
It’s hard to manage an office at a young age :(
295 · Jan 2016
To my Man
Ysabel Jan 2016
I miss how you stare at me after our fight,
I miss how you whispher sweet nothings just to make me smile,
I miss how your hand draw beautiful art,
I miss how you lips touches mine.

These thoughts of yours had made me insane,
For thinking that you're still here breathing.
If only I can shout your name,
And whisper I love you and Happy Birthday My Man.
Happy birthday Paolo, it's been five years since you're gone.
295 · Apr 2017
Just don't
Ysabel Apr 2017
Don't let her fall
If you don't intend
To keep her.

Don't fix her heart
If one day
You'll break her.

Don't say promises
If one day
You'll leave her.

Just say what you feel,
Do what you want
Without secong guessing,
For that it what she deserves.

No lies,
No sweet words,
No broken promises.
I dont love him but Im trying to
287 · Oct 2018
Lost girl
Ysabel Oct 2018
I don’t know what to do anymore
I keep on making decisions, I don’t know if it’s worthy
I want to cross the road and feel the pain caused by the car
I want to inflict pain that I wanted for so long
I want to be gone
But I can’t
Because I have work
I have responsibilities
I have obligations
That I need to do
I need to fulfill.
I hate wandering around and feeling lost and empty
I hate this feeling
I hate myself
287 · May 2016
Drop it
Ysabel May 2016
I was hollowed
I was shattered
I run before but I couldn’t run away.
You were there
Watching me from afar
You tried to catch me but you didn’t try actually.
We were lost
And we will never meet again
Like a parallel lines that will never intersect.
They can give us new life
They make us happy
But not as the happiness we had before we drop it all away.
283 · Dec 2015
Writer's Block
Ysabel Dec 2015
When your thoughts are too vague and you can't fathom where would your ideas go,
When all you need is to scribble down all those but you're too lazy to do,
When you can't help but deny that your childhood dream is now turning blue,
And when all you've written for almost your lifetime were just mediocre and nonsense clue.

Then stop! Take a break and let your hand wander,
Let it feel a different job aside from painting ink in your paper,
Maybe it needs a little time for itself to discover,
And talk to the Almighty God through prayer.
265 · May 2016
So if you...
Ysabel May 2016
I left
Not because I gave up
But because I want you to hold on.

I cried
Not because I'm weak
But because my feelings for you is too strong.

I got drunk
Not because it makes me forget
But because I'm afraid I might drown in this relation-****.

I wrote
Not because I can't speak
But because I want my words stub you and make you regret.

So if you could read this,
tell me what you feel
and I will Love you still.
253 · May 2016
Mornings with you
Ysabel May 2016
A little bit of sweetness,
Plus a spoon full of love.
Stir it with perfection,
Then drown it with warm hugs.
This is how my morning goes,
A day started with smiles and warmth
243 · Oct 2017
Happy birthday, self
Ysabel Oct 2017
With all the adversaries she is facing,
With all the issues she is enduring,
With all the wrong things that cover her goodness,
On the night of her birthday, she finally took her last breathe
Just
To
Be
Free
At
Last
Probably my last note
242 · May 2018
Distress
Ysabel May 2018
Sometimes I wish I'm a different person,
Sometimes I wish I could easily be in a relationship,
Sometimes I wish I could be normal,
Because I'm tired now of being the person they want me to be.
I'm tired of bridging things just to save everybody.
I'm tired of being the strong one when in fact I need someone whom I can hug, kiss, and cry my burdens to.
I'm freaking tired of this life.
I'm don't know what to do anymore.
233 · Jun 2016
Transform
Ysabel Jun 2016
Have you been wondering why everything doesn't fall into places?
That no matter how hard you try to fix it, you would still stumble along the way.
Maybe its time for you to stop fixing and start asking help.
You need to acknowledge that we all need help from another.
But if a man can't help you then look above, for He has always planned a great future ahead of you.
Trust me, He changed me.
Now its up to you if want to be transformed.
Jesus is amazing God. He transformed me and freed me from sin and condemnation.
230 · Dec 2018
Lost
Ysabel Dec 2018
Im so lost that I barely know myself.
My work ate my existence and their words made me lost my motivation to live.
If ever I could no longer keep this emptiness, please know that I did my very best to fight it but Im sorry I failed.
Believe me that I love my life and Im enjoying it but it feels like Im too overwhelmed and exhausted now.
Humans are so cruel that all you need is to cry yourself everyday
226 · May 2018
Singlehood
Ysabel May 2018
I'm so afraid that one day all this love I´ve saved up will not be given to anyone.
That the years of asking for the one, will be wasted
And I will be alone in an apartment with a dog and goats,
computer and notes,
Writing poems and scripts,
Wishing that fantasies were real.
I miss giving love and be loved
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