And in the eyes so lovely I see a shade of blue
That makes it so I find I stare when I dare to look at you
For mixed with green I see a hue I wish to always hold
In Montana skies lies lullabies lined with shade of gold

A newer sheen I've yet to find nor one that's so embracing
A wonder within a mystery with the beauty I'm facing
Smiling within layers so that nothing truly hides
And in that truth I find my world with Montana skies

I look into my mother eyes to see what she must see
And I am taken aback to see a part of me
I look into the mirror to see her chocolate skin
The dark and deepening brown eyes and the passion within

I look into my mother's heart and all I find is gold
A heart whose vigor never strays no matter how old
And I pray to follow those footsteps, to love so endlessly
For it's through my mother's golden heart God whispers to me

I wrap my hand 'round my mother's hand and feel her tightening grip
The one which acts as a net when on this tightrope of life I slip
And I see that she loves me and prays for me each and every night
Remembering the child she cradled in her arms, so tight

I look at my mother's hair, so neat, proper, and prim
Only to see the grey strands the hide deep within
And I am reminded that my mother is human and no more
That she is getting older, the woman I adore

And so I kiss my mother's cheek to see her serene smile
To let her know that she's done well in raising this foolish child
And with my ear pressed to the door, I hear her prayers to the Savior
So before I lie my head to sleep, I remember to return the favor

Chase us, oh Lord, for we run swiftly
Into our own ruin, so please chase quickly
Chase faster than tears can fall
Save us from ourselves

Embrace us, Lord, keep us from breaking
Help us in the undertaking
Hold us closer than the flailing wind
Be the peace that makes us whole

Clean us, oh Lord, in heart and mind
Leave not one spot of grime behind
Wipe us cleaner than blanketing snow
And let love ne'er run dry

We would give a day
A part of our lives
Just to see their smiling faces
And put it on a page
For a chance to write
How we feel in an embrace
And they would smile each time
We wrote a word
The sun would be our desktop light
To illuminate verbs and such simple words
That gleam in the light of the smile

We would give a week
And press pause on a whim
Just to feel that kiss on our cheek
The speech would then end
And we would bring pens
To record the things we feel
And they would swoon which each time
Our lips chose to lock
The feeling never being erased
From the page of a smile with whim of a child
With a dream that took some time

We would give a month
A leap off a clock
Just to feel the touch our skin
To know that the rose
Is not the only thing growing
And that the feeling is mutual
And with each time we touch
It would bring inspiration
That flows through blood and brain and soul
The ink vial would be full and the blood would then rush
And invoke tears inside a word

We would give a year
A slice of our being
To make sure the feeling is oh, so right
Watch the moon pass and fade
Peaking the day to day
And feel the summer and winter pass
All for a feeling
All for a smile
All for a touch and for a kiss
So the whole world can say we gave up a day
In order to write things like this

Stand still

I feel myself sinking
And inside I’m thinking
That each movement I’m making
Is pulling me deeper

Stand still

Focus on what you say
Always be sure to convey
Emotional and fervency, there’s no time to waste
Our lives are at stake

Stand still

I can feel every breath
Pulse thumping closer to death
Wondering where we went wrong in the right
And if your lovely eyes will again see the sunlight

Stand still

Capture this moment please
Sinking beyond the knees
Torso receding as I hold close to you
Wondering when the sinking will be through

Stand still

Take the deepest of breaths
I can see you’re scared to death
Hold closer to me as we are swallowed whole
And may God rest our soul

Forever standing
Still

Is my soul within my hands instead of in my heart?
For not my heart, but my hands are what I use to take part
In both good or evil, from ending to start
And my hands that paint the greys in this piece of art

Am I good though my hands carry on in violent desperation?
Grabbing selfishly at life in strife regardless of evil's escalation
No thought of others, valor, or God's promised vindication
You look at me and see yourself in the evaluation

Can I prove I am more than stepping stones composed of good intentions?
And if so, then do actions and therefore my soul aide in good's intervention
Are these lines embedded in my palms signs of past transgressions
Or a tally of the justice I've yet to do in this fragile life's progression

Where do stand on the issue at hand
And are you prepared to be branded a fool
For the clocking ever quickening is awfully sickening
When you find hypocritical rules
A choice gone unmade's like a sitting grenade
Some are winners and some lose a life
And whether you end with more foes or more friends
The key is to find yourself in the strife

Here we are in a valley amidst a mountain of troubles
Running out of breath as the world pops our bubbles
Using our wands to push wishes up to the stars

We reach for the sky, but our feet they stay grounded
In a state of mind that I'm sure that we've founded
Trying to find our way like a tourist with a map in a car

Ever spinning, the inning is only the first
If life is a stage, we've forgot to rehearse
The bubbles bursting in our eyes, causing unforeseen tears

And amidst the mountains and unforeseen sorrows
The confusion of yesterday, unseen skies of tomorrow
My only solace lies in the comfort that you, love, are near

I'll brave the woes, as long as you're here...

I pray you wake to find yourself amongst yellow lilies
A few steps away from a place called home
That those who you leave behind here will remember you fondly
And that the light will never leave you alone

I pray we shall look on as tears flow from our face
As you look at us in that faraway place
That our tears will bloom flowers in the wake
Of a goodbye that won't last a tomorrow

I pray the sun will kiss your skin and pain will be no more
That He will adorn you with such gifts befitting a long lost son
That you will be in the presence of the One you worship and adore
And though one life has ended, a new life has begun

I pray your legacy lives on in heart, in action, and in mind
That your song rings forth in those you've left behind
That the day will come again when we meet in an embrace
As brothers and sisters at the feet of the Father

I pray that joy will be felt in the memories like the rays of the sun
That the love planted will endure through and through
That you will feel the lilies planted by the Father and the Son
And that the Holy Spirit will guide us as it did you

I will be broken on Thursday
It’s a factual thing to say
You may try to dissuade me
But I know, ‘cause I’m broken today

Offer your words and your sympathies
The cracked, the chipped china cup
Lips try to kiss back missing pieces
And so often they end up cut

I will be broken on Thursday
In filled rooms or all alone
Proclaim how you empathize
But it’s a burden I bear on my own

The smile I project onto my face
Is not to repair me, but you
Love is never lost in the efforts conveyed
But there’s only so much you can do

I will be broken on Thursday
A consistently cracked state of mind
Tuesday disappointing, Wednesday disjointed
But Friday has yet to decide

I am much more than I seem
Yet what I seem to be is me
Which is to say that me is more
Than my meager definition

And if you saw what I seem to see
Then you might think more or less of me
And it would be devastation or complimentry
That would be my own prescription

So if I'm more than what I be
Then I may be you and you may be me
And maybe we could be one in the same
And more than both we thought

And I guess that we'd be correct
And the world's opinion we could reject
Because we find we are more the they attest
And we were more than we were taught

What things might come from the beating drums
Of feet stomping the dust
As cymbals chime with swords that fly
And clash like rain to pavement

What things might jump from the trump
Of a million voices shouting against one another
As the juice of life is squeezed out in strife
And blood covers the hand of many

What good will flow from ashen snow
As fire consumes and engulfs
And man sees not the face of the human race
But segregates himself from his brother

I have never seen such tears or heard such gentle cries
And never meet one deserving of the tears that leave your eyes
No lover, right or wrong, worthy of the sobs that bury joy
No creature that encapsulates the beauty you employ
Yet hear I stand gazing on this artistic travesty
A trifle that has broken you so undeservingly
For mere mem are not worthy of the tears that angels shed
My only wish that wings will rise from all the pain you've bled

First pleas
Unsaid
Red eyes
Dry riverbeds
Here lies
Happiness
Buried six feet deep in regrets

Seconds pass
Out of time
Speak now
I’ve tried
Spelled out
Words repeat
Words first said as you fade to sleep

Dreamer
I call to you
Thrice more
Beyond veiled view
Same hour
Twelfth night
When fate took you from my life

Questions
Madness drives
To forefronts
Darkness arrives
Forever more
Your deathly dance
Unchained from mortal coil and my hands

Dark night
Fifth on same day
Answer me
In my dismay
Where she
Still alive
Would she stand to be my wife?

Sycophant
To demons now
Here I plead
Hear my vow
Disaster struck
Her voice I know
This pain in me only grows

Heaven now
At my back
Seventh cry
Into the black
Driving words
In my mind
Wond’ring how she left me behind

8:00
On the hour
When hands turned cold
When life turned sour
Thoughts careen
Into the fade
Twelfth night bereft of the day

Knees, you bleed
Heart is torn
My love, a corpse
With child, unborn
Words I read
Pure sacrilege
In hopes to breed words from the dead

Both hands dig in
Fingers trembling still
Hear my plea
Unsacred will
If she would speak
These words to me
Maybe I could finally sleep

All attempts failed
No price to much
Gouge out these eyes
Hands go untouched
One this wicked month
Short of a dozen years
I drive myself to bring you here

Oh Twelfth Night
What terror you bring
As words arise
From Hell’s opening
The inferno rains
Words burned in my head
“With this wedding ring, I thee wed”

If these days should quickly pass
If nothing's meant to last
If all must fade away

I would wish to spend each day
In all your misty haze
Today and yesterday

If the stars should fall to dust
The end then come for us
And this dawn be our last

I would never fret or waste
The way that your lips taste
And all days in our past

So if tomorrow comes again
If the world does not end
If each breathe follows another

Then let's not spend a second more
Out of the arms of one adored
And dwell in the lips of a lover

Faded glory
Prayers on slim fit jeans
Foreign to victory
Leading to second story pleas

Can you hear her?
Despairing with whispered screams
But tears don’t answer
The many questions they bring

Faded glory
$20 when on sale
See the story
Of the strongest of the frail

Can you see her?
Wishes to fly, though she barely crawls
There’s a glimmer
Prevailing amidst the falls

Faded glory
Well worn and stretched to fit
Constant weathering
Pushing on till something rips

Can you feel her?
Is there a choir that recognizes her song?
Are you a singer?
Are your jeans ripped but still on?

The wounds have to heal, though the scars might stay
Reminding you of the failures of yesterday
And all of the grey just gets darker, dragging you back
You cry and you try and often times you fail
The wall you build blocks the sun to save your heart, so frail
As you cower within the darkness, fearing attack
So you call for a cure as the blackness consumes
And pray a bit more, although you truly presume
That you are too far gone, the dark clouding your eyes
'Till the sun peeks through a crack that wasn't there before
Emitting enough light to show the wall holds a door
And there stands someone consistently knocking on the other side...

She said the days were far too long and heaven too far away
And I had not a way or word to comfort her that day
Her smooth skin would show me wounds that no one else had seen
And that she walked the nightmarish journey to reach the shining dream
No stars showed in her eyes that day as she spoke her personal truth
The minutes, hours, days, months, and years that had beaten her since youth
She said the night had been far from kind and in turned she longed for sun
But the sun had yet to shine and the dark was far from done
I had no words for there were none, on tongue or fingertips
No comfort in my shadowed touch for her quivering lips
And so I stood without arms in the face of a battle with her soul upon display
As stars fell in her truth-filled tears, with heaven so far away

Dearest, drink, my heart does pour
A love that overflows by scores
With scrapes and bruises now sustained
And passion flowing through my veins

Your blades of charm, they cut into
My beating heart, their aim proves true
The dam broken, love floods my all
Filling my mind, 'till all I recall

Is you.

My head is filled to the brim
Packed brainstems
Maybe that’s why I take you straight to heart
Truths whispered and held in cupped hands
Like butterflies, then released
See where they land and the clarity they impart
You words are vast galaxies
Mystical, colorful imagery
Like melted crayons pouring from the fount of your mouth
Dripping into molds making wax elephants
Heavy words trumpeting sentiments
That I may never ever truly figure out
Eyes that speak paragraphs upon chapters upon volumes
Upon libraries
And I am only a syllable in the commentary
Fill the empty crevices of a heart once on fire
Long since expired
And give this charred thing new life, incendiary
Make this full mind empty every bit but you
Clear the queue
So I might feast on more than these offerings of crumbs
Minds will always be filled and filling
And full
But the the choice of what’s ingested is the rule of thumb

Wonder-filled

My words do not reach far enough
And my arms are not strong enough
Reaching out and call forth
But my calls are unheard
Falling from an unknown place
Feathers fall from wings of grace
Can you hear me calling love?
My dawn has turned to dusk

Ode to the girl who sails upon milky white oceans
Ode to the girl who traveled oh so far
For she looked in the black of night
And poked holes in the sky
And in her heart prayed a wish upon a star

She would dream such wondrous dreams upon the sea
And where many faded, the light of hers stayed true
A dream of light, a wish of love
Floated far up above
Through the fog from her eyes of blue

On sandy shores she'd slumber on and the stars would sing
With a roaring fire cradling her to sleep
In sleep she'd dance with a dream
And dance with one only
Amidst the stars, as the night, onward, would creep

And so the union of the girl and dream would carry on
Forever more would it forever be
A dream that lingers in the sky
And in the young girl's eyes
Until the dream becomes reality

I have been here on your side before the line was drawn
Drawing my sword in the blindness that emanated before dawn
Pushing out the pretenders with your hand clasped to mine
As blood and sweat, bone and flesh met with my blade in time
I defended you, befriending you amidst your lows and lifted you high
Shared in the echoing laughter as well as the tears you've cried
Sung to a thousand ears your praises in unending song
I have walked this path with you... don't prove my efforts to be wrong...

Have your fill, my son
The war has not been won
Let your lungs inhale smoke and dust
And feast upon this buffet

See what anger has bred
As on blood soaked dirt you tred
Know that songs of the lost will ring
Where silence was once the victor

Drink from this cup, my son
The time, the day, has come
For if you return, body, heart, and soul
You will not return the same

Each step I took was watched silently
Hands quivering, legs shaking violently
As quietly they stared at me
A newborn lamb amidst wolves

And I looked up with tear strewn face
Too far from help, parted from grace
A thousand eyes stare, ****, and poke
Alone but not alone

In fragile china I hold my hopes of yesterday
Cupping my hands in fear that they might spill away
Not a breath taken, no, they might fly from me
Cupped in my hand is truly where they're suppose to be

I catch each hope as they trickle down my face
No one understanding why I do this in such haste
But if yesterday is unlike the present, in which it's always assured
And I dare not dip my dreams in the tyrant called the future

My eyes, they never stray from fragile china in my hand
Slowly I choose to walk, apart from my fellow man
My fears they increase only 'cause it's filling up
And with that, my grip tightens, and soon I'll shatter my cup

How may I remember you
Lovely girl, eyes of blue
Days long passed, year run by
Springs of memories ne'er run dry
How may I remember you
And in time will my mind stay true
To pink lips and fingertip gracing
Or will time start slowly replacing
How I may remember you
As the walls of the past come unglued
For all I know is all I've seen
A never ending menagerie
How may I remember you
I suppose I will as I always do
A vision, a lost breath, a love adored
But as a memory and nothing more

Cracked is all I’ve known
Frayed lines my only home
My soul is pouring out like yoke
I find I’m not whole

I have yet to find a “why”
Too poor to live, too young to die
A tightrope walker hanging by a thread
A teacup continually chipping

And the audience applauds at such
My measures to see I don’t break too much
These words of crimson color pour
From gaping crevasses

I form each tearing truth to roses
Each biting ache I self compose
Compressed into symphonies of diamond
The wound unhealed, but heard

The piercing dagger now my pen
My mind plunging it, twisting again
To find the joy of my head sorrows
So beautifully broken

Did you fade away only to be replaced by morning dew
The night we shared and cradled done and gone
For I spent a fair part of the morn searching for you
Only to find half of us moved on

Wooden floors littered with sun and clothes upon the floor
Disheveled sheets mark where you used to lay
Heaven came with the night and then walked out my door
To never be seen in the light of day

If I had the wings
Upon this back of mine
Would I fly with them
Or would my heart be fragile
And fear the chance to fall
And crush my soles

Head rested upon his shoulder
So strong, so brave, a few years older
Striking comfort amidst the chaos
Without each other, they'd surely be lost

Baby rests in silent slumber
Greenest eyes closed, oh the wonder
She looks into the fire as the wood splinters
The last roses within winter

He stares into the blackness of night
Guarding, vigil, 'till daylight
Holds her close, so secure
Always watching, always sure

And there they stay, those roses three
Holding strong through bitter breeze
With fire and them to last cold gale
Roses in winter, brave but frail

I watched my heart sink into you
And knew not what I was to do
To retrieve such a precious thing
That away from you I could not bring
And so love locked at the sight of you
'Till it overtook my blurred view
And I was left with nothing right
As my heart was unjustly stolen that night

If I could choose a forever, if I should choose a day
Nary would I hesitate nor would my heart be swayed
To spend eternity or a second in you embrace
To share a second or ever after gazing upon your face

If I should be immortal or finding my dying day
My skin forever filled with color or my ashes fly away
Not one doubt would fill my mind of the joy you bring
Ever today and ever tomorrow, to my darling shall I cling

How far we go into the depths of it
Until we find we were never meant to wander
For we were never really ready for the pit
Since the light of day we obviously squandered
But who, if not we? Where if not there?
Why if not to brave it and lead the lost home?
For though the pit far outweighs mankind's strength
'Twas never said we would venture alone..

Dear Saturday, I write to you from foreign lands
I'm in a Monday I'm not sue I understand
The day is shining, yet I am in misery
All these strange people seem to be yelling at me

Oh, dearest Saturday, your ways are now my own
You hold me close in bed and say I can stay home
The other the days just seem to get in the way
The only mutual friend I seem to have's Friday

Dear Friday, you introduced me to my love
Out and about we where, trying to rise above
Monday through Thursday called me friend, bit caused me strife
But you showed me the day that would improve my life

Dear Saturday, the way you treat me oh, so well
Has shown me heaven in a week filled with hell
I will hang onto Monday only for so long
But I'll miss you more than ever simply when you're gone

Cracked China cup
At a chipped table
Stained cloth dressing
Do you still see
Beautiful
Tell me now
As broken candles
Burn
        On
Down
Broken things
See broken things
And cracks hide
Truth
I see you
This crack’ed thing
And I see you
Beautiful
Lovely you
Cracked
But not outdone
They try to
Break you
Take you
Because you’re the only
One
A cracked cup
That runneth over
But
Can still hold your
Own
Oh precious
How you’ve grown
Setting a place that
You deserve
I pray that
You are filled
Cracks only
Show
When you can’t
Hold

But I’d gladly hold
You

These changes were not warranted
Unwanted, strange, and cruel
A twisting plot that transformed me quickly from king to fool

My life was not the same, a shame
A spring that sprung to winter
A tree that I had nursed and fed that grew, flourished, then splintered

And if these plans were indeed planned
The planning was not my own
And I see now the broken bough that forces me to grow

My bones they creaks and groan, I've grown
Forcing me to learn from the wrongs
And now the fool must start again to see he was a fool all along

I bleed such colors in excess and run them, focused, through
Until you face such wonders I've painted in front of you
Burning words entangle and burn indentations in your mind
Finding things you once never knew you could find

Time to pick up the words that fell out my mouth earlier today
In an effort to try to save myself and my heart from wasting away
Words were said in a manner that rendered me foolish to the naked eye
A lapse of judgement, a rush of blood, all the things that made you cry
Misunderstanding seem to be commanding my actions as I burst through the door
Words that once held merit now are dipped in malice, and like lead, fall to the floor
And it's only with the clanging of my words on the tile that I wake to see you there
A mountain of bravery that shelters inside a person so very frail
And I then find words wound far more than presumed as I see the tears well in your eyes
As I kick aside those lead words while rushing you to my arms, whispering for you not to cry
I've come to understand that arguments go in hand with a voice, that much is true
That this is expected in the mash up called love that was made from me and you
And as long as a solution is found in the shouting and we come back to each other's embrace
We'll find ourselves stronger through the storm called life, there's no trouble that we can't face

Wished upon the silver day
Darkness then fades away
Light come in the form of rays
Upon the shining moon

Drenched within the summer nights
I look to the stars so bright
Full in sky, clear as daylight
Moonlit nights in June

Hope to dream once again
Raising me as they descend
Praying nights may never end
As I dream of you

If these dreams I've woven together are falling apart
Will you be there so I might call you friend
For as I try to pick up their fragments in the dark
My heart aches, my back breaks as I bend

Make this world a little friendlier, days a little sunnier
Make the ides of my life wonder-filled
Be a friend to me in the bleakest of nights
Stand firm for me and I will stand for you at will

I found that spring would then sing and leave in haste
As if to torment me with a hint of a taste
And I would be left there wondering what could have become
Of me if I could have stay in spring before the song was done

And summer it blazed as it always has and always will
And fall was so nice but left me with winter's chill
All of the seasons that tried but could not fill spring
So I sit and wait until once again I hear it sing

I feel the quilt for the seams
Fingerprints in the dream
And I see you beside me
Hand in mine
And I remember the little things

Memories falling as if leaves
As fall turns into spring
Please slow for just a moment
Hand in mine
As I reminisce passing little things

Pieced together, weathered, worn
Is the individuals amidst the swarm
With no concerns to scrapes or burns
No lessons learned and too far gone

The teeth, the maw, a lion roams
As we withdraw, so far from home
We value metals, bricks, plastics
To distract from what's going on

Another done, another day
As our eyes focus on the display
Of phone, computers, tv screens
That thin out all our hopes and dreams

As we careen and bend and break
Our souls, half full, get no intake
And output that which molds and rusts
Ashes to ashes... dust in dusk

Shortness of breath
How fitting
As the socially deaf start in the bidding
Of a mind
Of a heart
And soul
Of a billion
See me in my frustration
See the color of my skin
How is the least of these
The most important of all?
I hear the anguish of breaking glass
Broken spirits
They call
Losing hope as a burning world
Scares me half to death
Empathize
Because who will you run to
When you’re the oppressed?
Silence in respect
Join me as I raise my fist
(Beat)
Hands up
I surrender
Tears fall, this may be it
Will I be missed?
USA
Born and raised
Living grenade
Shaken, beaten, and stirred
And when I explode
Anarchist?
Terrorist?
That’s absurd
I am a product of a machine
That grinds me into dust
You may be in the same gear
Don’t ignore it
Discuss
My brothers
My sisters
It is clear
Blood is red
How are we so divided
With the same thoughts in our heads?
Let scars remind of the pain
Wash the anger from your hands
Ceasefire, be at peace
Don’t make new cuts
Understand
Wrongs do not right
Our message must be clear
A crowd must scream in unison
For them to properly hear
Demand
And march on
Open eyes to the plea
Change must be made
Pick it up from it’s knees
Help me, help you
Help us
Who’s next?
Clearly see
We all slowly suffocate
When one of us cannot breathe

I can’t breathe...

#blacktuesday #PartOfAColoredPeople #icantbreathe2020 #BLM #BlackLivesMatter #peacefulprotest #MarchOn

Does moonlight impede you
Do you get the full view
Of the
Sun that lies within

It’s so hard to read you
You see, in the read-though
Of the
Book the dialect changed

Your shoulders are heavy
And you never feel your ready
Slow and steady
Slow

This isn’t a race
So why is your heart still racing
Beats seemingly replacing
Time

Time is a construct
Look towards the home front
It is
Always somewhere near

The night brings such sorrow
You feel no hope for tomorrow
It is
Storm clouds in your head

Raindrops on your pillow

Steady
The road is hard, the load heavy
And you might think you're ready
To travel it alone

Wary
Know that life is so scary
Only a few people will carry
You when you stumble on the stones

Nary
Of these road, though they vary
Can break you if you don't tarry
A movement of muscle and bone

Verily
Life will never treat you fairly
But wander, my dear, only rarely
And soon you'll be where you choose to go

Gasping
Lack of breath
Grasping
Scared to death
No defense
Don’t even know what’s wrong

Listless
Feather in the gale
Distress
Existence so frail
Please don’t blink
I’m afraid that you might miss me

Unkempt
Unorganized at best
Present
Yet behind nonetheless
Minutes written down
In a ledger I will see too late

Run down
Try to keep together
Sinking ground
Trying to be better
Humanity
Catching up more and more

Shades of purple
Come out easily
Purple displays strength well known
Those types of arms that feel like home

She writes in cursive
Unique calligraphies
They translate in depth, you sink
Leagues and oceans upon paper and ink

Fights the wild things
They mistake her for one of their own
And though untamed she may be
She stays vigil, her own she oversees

Shade always seems the same
A book in volumes under lock and key
If you read what bled through you might worry, so
She gives you only what you need to know

Always purple
Different hues now and then
She will always be your solid ground
Even when her world is crumbling ‘round

She was more to me
Than most would be
In a eternity

And although she saw me
Looking strangely
At her, I knew she knew me

And I would smile at her
And say the words
That would unlock absurd

Little inside jokes
That we both spoke
Till with laughter we'd choke

And so as Eros aimed
I asked her name
And she smiled and said Rose

And Rose is all I knew
And she stayed true
To all, for all was Rose