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Mar 15 · 51
heartsore
It's been a while since this,
feeling,
came to visit.       This,
all too familiar...
crawl-out-of-my-skin,
feeling.       This,
boulder-in-my-throat,
choking-not-breathing,
feeling.       This,
isolate-and-hide,
I've-been-compromised,
feeling.       This,
     ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด...
     that if you go now,
     my heart might stop beating.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Mar 15
Play It Safe
A spark sets fire to the walls,
of my tightly sealed chest.
Treasures of past pain,
it previously kept.
Memories of hurt,
betrayal and regret -
now fueling the flames
of my burning rage.

๐˜ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ข๐˜บ.

๐˜ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ถ๐˜ฑ ๐˜ช๐˜ง ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ณ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜จ๐˜ฉ๐˜ต ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ ๐˜ญ๐˜ฐ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ธ๐˜ข๐˜บ.

There's very few who know,
how to get close to this flame.
How to steady its burn,
and feel it without pain.
I am nestled deep within,
and the love I have to give,
๐—œ๐˜€ ๐—น๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ถ๐˜'๐˜€ ๐—ป๐—ฎ๐—บ๐—ฒ.
...But it's locked up in a cage.
Guarded by my fears.
Protected by my rage.
And if it's not safe to play,
then I won't play it safe.
I'll set fire to it all,
just so that my heart can't break.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ

(๐’‡๐’–๐’ ๐’‡๐’‚๐’„๐’•: ๐’‰๐’†๐’“ ๐’‰๐’†๐’‚๐’“๐’• ๐’‚๐’๐’˜๐’‚๐’š๐’” ๐’ƒ๐’“๐’†๐’‚๐’Œ๐’”)

'ยฐยคยฐโ˜†ยฐยคยฐ'
Mar 15
Pine Trees.
This torch - ignite it only,
if you wish to proceed:

It burns on your desire
continuously,
lighting the way
to the feeling you seek.

The longer the longing,
to which the fire you feed,
the larger its flames;
the steadier its heat.

Whisper your woes
to the torch to defeat,
& burn off the pain
of shame, heart break, deceit.

If you sing it your sorrows,
you may find youre relieved.
For the flames of this torch,
heat with healing properties.

Or spill out your passions,
toss in your beliefs.
Whatever you're pining -
on this the flames feed.

Fire glows desire,
dancing with intensity.
& ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฆ๐˜ช๐˜จ๐˜ฉ๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ด ๐˜บ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฏ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ,
๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ฎ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด ๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ด ๐˜ฌ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฑ.

๐—ฃ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐˜€ yearn heavy,
& set fire - unleashed.
My heart overheats,
so, solace I seek.

& ๐˜ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ญ๐˜ญ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ด๐˜ช๐˜จ๐˜ฏ๐˜ด...

I breathe to the rhythm,
I feel from my soul chimes.
Picking locks on my thoughts.
Breaking into my mind.

Once inside, I found Silence
waiting on me to arrive.
She met me with kind eyes,
& a quiet reminder, divine.

Silence says:

"๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ ๐˜ด๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ญ ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ง๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ
๐˜›๐˜ฐ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฅ๐˜บ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ'๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ช๐˜ณ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ.
๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ด๐˜ฎ๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ญ๐˜บ ๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜จ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ
๐˜ž๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ฉ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ.
๐˜Œ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ค๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ญ๐˜บ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ต๐˜ธ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ
๐˜ž๐˜ช๐˜ต๐˜ฉ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด ๐˜ถ๐˜ฏ๐˜ช๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ...
๐˜ˆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ข ๐˜ด๐˜ญ๐˜ช๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ, ๐˜ฅ๐˜ช๐˜ท๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ.

๐™”๐™ค๐™ช ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฅ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ฎ ๐˜ฌ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ."

๊ง๊ง‚

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Mar 15 · 49
Untouchable
Be kind, stay conscious.
Keep steady, be honest.
There's one thing I promise...
The darkness can't haunt us,
When we seed our dreams,
In starlight beams,
And cast that light upon us,
We're untouchable to darkness.

ใ€Š ๐”ป๐•š๐•ง๐•š๐•Ÿ๐•–๐•๐•ช ๐•˜๐•ฆ๐•’๐•ฃ๐••๐•–๐•• ๐•“๐•ช ๐•ฅ๐•™๐•– ๐•”๐• ๐•ค๐•ž๐• ๐•ค. ใ€‹

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Mar 15 · 51
An invitation
" & on the darkest nights,
I feel deeply inclined...
to invite the sky
to fully unwind,
and wrap its stars
around my mind. "

โ—‡

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Mar 15
hailstorm
I don't know how
To get her home,
Or if she has one...
Does ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ even know?

If I reached out my hand,
Would she even pull?

She's been making herself larger.
I can feel her reappearance.
She gets brighter, I get darker.
Interfering with my impulse,
And it happened again...

I forgot how I got here,
Don't where I began.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
This is my time,
to be released.

To leave behind,
midaged beliefs.

Uproot the past
& plant new seeds.

Tend to my garden
& water my dreams.

I grow flowers from visions
& pick wisdom off trees.

Thoughts ripen in the berries
& I harvest the seeds.

I sow kindness in rows,
next to seeds of belief.

I grow herbs sown from hope.
Harvest love from snap peas.

I offer my confidence,
to dandelion seeds.

To grow in the cracks
of the sidewalks, between.

Intuition, year-round
grows on evergreen trees.

The depths of its roots,
sink as deep into me.

Wild-smile flower-fields.
Lilac kisses, serene.

Lavender loves laughter
& the scent of dopamine.

Sexuality is ripened,
Nestled in the tangerine.

Creativity grows on vines,
& blooms into epiphanies.

I found grounding in the basil.
Infused rosemary with peace.

& what I find in thyme,
exists purely spiritually.

I rest my soul in the garden
& I feel her cherish me.

She accepts my every fragment
& I listen to her needs.

I learn to tend the darkness.
& to keep my temple clean.

To water everything with love
& divine light frequencies.

To nurture the new growth,
by snipping off dead leaves.

To invite source inside.
& be open to receive,

The cleansing of my spirit
& its ancient history.

Taking shape, we make form
of what we choose to believe.

Bringing forth new flowers,
Into our reality.

So, I tend to my successes
& pull out all the weeds.

I lay gardenbeds of seedlings,
that from feelings, I reaped.

Every outcome is concocted,
of whats currently perceived.

So stay up here with me,
& please, don't go to sleep.

Don't run in the dark,
chasing what's out of reach.

& if I seem quiet,
then Im not asleep.

I am tending my garden,
Bringing life to my dreams.

โ™ก
.................

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Mar 6 · 38
Release
Constantly on the brink,
Of letting it all go, or
Letting it all sink.

I treasure the moments
When I can feel,
Small fragments of me
Release and heal.
Dec 2022 · 57
Midnight Cries
I sit
I lay
I close my eyes

I breathe
I try
To slow my mind

I drift
I fall
After some time

I sleep
I dream
I'm deep inside

I move
I seek
I try to find

I walk
I search
Can't find the light

I hurt
I feel
It in the night

I fear
I shake
I can't deny

I see
I run
These demons, mine

I cry
I try
To find out why

I stop
I face
These tangled lies

I fight
I love
With all my might

I know
I'm safe
If I must die

I'm lost
Forgot
It's just a ride

I toss
I turn
From side to side

I sweat
I scream
My body fights

I push
I burst
Eyes open wide

I wake again
To midnight cries.
Nov 2022 · 83
The Gatekeeper
Saying no to you,
Carved a line in the earth.

It stood in front all the ways,
I'd been broken before.

It kept back all the pain,
While I learned to walk away.
Sep 2022 · 126
Pulsing
Your breath invades me.
Consumed in full.
I cant evade you.
Escape this pull.

Your lips are tender,
But your teeth will bite.
Your tongue is wet,
And your grip is tight.

Your eyes see through me,
And our skin combines.
Ive become your offering,
And you've become mine.
Sep 2022 · 56
I Won Today
It was wet on my face at 6am today, but
I won.
My heart was jumping hurdles all day, but
I won.
My thoughts were spilling into each other, but
I won.

๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฑ.

Today,
All the fragments
Of myself
That ive transformed
From the inside out, well...
Today,
They were tested.
And,
I won.

I won because,
Despite today
And all my fears,
I did it anyway.

I won because,
I stood my ground,
Gracefully,
And im proud.

I won because,
I innerstand
My love of self
Is a part of the plan.

Theres a reason why,
When we honour ourselves,
We make waves in the ocean of life, but
๐—ช๐—ฒ ๐—บ๐˜‚๐˜€๐˜ ๐—ธ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ฝ ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฑ๐˜† ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜†๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜†.

Its okay to put your own needs first,
Even when it rocks the boats of others.
And its okay to put someone else first,
As long as your not abandoning ship to do so.

Loving yourself isnt about not loving other people.
๐˜๐˜ต'๐˜ด ๐˜ข๐˜ฃ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ต ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ท๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ง ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฑ๐˜ณ๐˜ฐ๐˜ค๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด.

And today, well...
๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฑ, but
I won.

Because no matter
How hard
They tried to pull me away...

Today,
๐™„ ๐™™๐™ž๐™™๐™ฃ๐™ฉ ๐™ก๐™š๐™–๐™ซ๐™š ๐™ข๐™ฎ๐™จ๐™š๐™ก๐™› ๐™—๐™š๐™๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™™.

โ–ช๏ธŽ micalight โ–ช๏ธŽ
Sep 2022 · 67
Consumed By You
Lost in the ruins of you.
My soul in tune,
With your tattered truth.

Oh, throw me down,
And show me now,
Just how you drown.
Sep 2022 · 979
The Star Clad Truth
The wind
Hasn't spoken
To me in weeks,
And I miss her.

I've lasted, but
In some ways
I haven't found
What she left me with.

I love how the sky
Is stitched to my skin,
Breathing life to my bones...
๐˜—๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ฑ๐˜ด ๐˜'๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ญ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฌ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ.

I sit with myself
A little too often.
Is it healthy
To stare this deep?

I find what
I'm looking for,
But then I always
Find more to look for...

And I wonder,
๐˜๐˜ด ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ ๐˜ช๐˜ต'๐˜ด ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ?
A broken record
Reminding me.

๐˜ˆ๐˜จ๐˜ข๐˜ช๐˜ฏ, ๐˜ข๐˜จ๐˜ข๐˜ช๐˜ฏ...

These universal lessons -
They have no end.

I could try to find
The reasons why,
But I haven't much time.
So I don't ask why.

For I am much too far
From the night sky stars,

ย ย ย ย  To ever,

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  ย  truly,

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  ย ย ย ย  know.


ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  .โ™ก.

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Jul 2022 · 711
The Plan
Clearly now I see,
That my soul had a plan.
Laid out perfectly for me,
To endure and withstand.

No I wouldn't do it over,
But Id never give it up.
I just keep moving forward,
Through the lessons I pick up.

I hear it in my soul,
When it's time to make a move.
A pull I can't control,
Brings me to another truth.

A lesson meets me there,
But at first I'm blind to see it.
Repeat repeat - til I'm aware,
And then she will reveal it.

Soul decoding old ways,
Uploading what is new.
These stories of your earthly days,
Are the building blocks of you.

The source collecting energy,
From all your transformation.
With every ancestor redeemed,
She is raising her vibration.

So tune into your highest self,
And don't you ever doubt,
That you come from a higher realm,
Made of stardust all throughout.

You bring this all within you,
So watch carefully for signs.
Youll know just what to do,
When the universe aligns.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Apr 2022 · 203
Cognizant
She walks out
and bears her soul
to the unknown.

Step by step.
Trusting that the path
Will continue to form
Before her.

It's a feeling.
An instinct.
A drive.
A knowing.

It's malleable.
Create-able.
Magical.

It lives.
It relates.
It changes.
It grows.

And when I get lost,
I always know
This feeling will take me
Where I need to go.

So i listen carefully
For the calls in my soul.
And go the direction
That i feel pulled.

Mica Light
Apr 2022 · 931
Me Too
๐—ง๐—ช: ๐—ฆ๐—ฒ๐˜…๐˜‚๐—ฎ๐—น ๐—”๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ฒ

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

It wasn't until I heard
Someone say, "me too"
That I started to view
That this pain was from you.
And you. And you.
And yes, you too.
But especially... ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ.

I came fractured and bruised.
The deprecation of my self worth
Started before you.
I'd long since been used
As a punching bag for others'
Emotional wounds.

So, when I met you...
I was a perfect package
Of cracked porcelain
Just pretty enough
To salvage.

Your attention and approval
Became my food.
Like a flower needs the sun
I thought that without you
Shining on me
That I'd be all for none.

Your claws dug deep in my belly,
And mine into yours.
Validating eachother,
In a toxic swirl.
You in the center,
Creating a world,
Where "no" has no weight,
Coming from a young girl.

"You're so pretty" you said.

My skin was like rice paper.

"I love the curls on your head"

My throat was titanium.

"Come sleep in my bed."

My stomach turned sideways.

I had told myself enough times by now,
"This is what you signed up for,
So you'd better allow.
It comes with the territory."
I believed this somehow.

I attached so much of myself to you.
Addicted to the magic,
scattered in with the abuse.
The pleasure in the pain,
Covering up the dark truth.
So well, I couldn't tell
That we were actually living
In some kind of hell,
Being sold to us
As love and friendship,
But it was just a shell
For dead end *******.

Sometimes I find I look back
To these times reminiscing,
But then all I can think is,
"๐˜ž๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ง๐˜ถ๐˜ค๐˜ฌ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฌ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜จ?"

Cause now I sit here and wonder,
Why did I have no edge?
I had lost the understanding of what
A "no" feels like in bed.

It took me years to cut you off.
๐—ง๐—ฒ๐—ป to be exact.
All this time I've hidden
These dark secrets of the past.

Not even realizing
It was fear
Holding me back.
Not even realizing
That this ****
Fed how I act.

๐—œ๐˜ ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ผ๐—ธ ๐Ÿฎ ๐˜†๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐˜€ ๐˜‚๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—น ๐—œ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—น๐—ฑ ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ฒ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ป๐—ฎ๐—บ๐—ฒ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐˜„๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐—ฑ "๐—ฎ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฟ" ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐˜€๐—ฎ๐—บ๐—ฒ ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ.

How brain washed is ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ต?

Ever since I dug your
Claws out of my belly,
My wounds began to heal
And i started to see fully,
This relationship with you -
You were nothing but a bully.
๐—” ๐—ฏ๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—ธ๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐˜ ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐—ฏ๐—น๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ธ ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ฏ๐—น๐˜‚๐—ฒ.

I've liberated myself from you.
And all the guilt and shame.
Understanding now,
Why so long I played your game.
I've taken back my power, and
I've taken back my name.
I'm not a victim of abuse.
I'm a raging, healing flame.
Burning down what you became.

Ashes are easy to blow away.
I rid of you and I'm on my way.
No longer afraid,
Of the monsters in the night.
Because, guess what?

I know what a '๐˜†๐—ฒ๐˜€' feels like.

Mica Light
Apr 2022 · 83
Elements Of My Life
When I am ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐˜๐—ต,
I am grounded,
I am safe.
But like rock,
I can be cracked, or
Crumbled.
Struggling,ย ย 
Trying,
To collect my self back up.

But when I am ๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐—ฟ,
I cannot break -
I can only be felt.
My state,
Doesn't relate,
To the futile,
Attempts,
To hurt me.
But it can get tiring,
Without being able,
To land.

And sometimes,
I'm like ๐—ณ๐—ถ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ.
A flame,
Of passion,
Can burst,
Into a Raging blaze,
Of love,
Or hate,
Or somewhere,
In between.

And other times,
I am like ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฟ.
I am lifted.
I float atop.
I am given a break,
Or,
I am given a lesson.

๐˜ˆ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜จ๐˜ฉ,
The waves...
Can turn into a monsoon, and

๐˜Œ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜จ๐˜ฉ,
The fire...
Could completely engulf me, and

๐˜Œ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜จ๐˜ฉ,
The winds..
May blow a bit too fierce, and
ย ย 
๐˜Œ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜จ๐˜ฉ,
The earth...
Can sometimes shatter beneath me,

๐—œ ๐˜€๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ.

For if I am to live this life,
There is nothing more,
And nothing less,
I could do.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
To live is the only way to know -
Through fate, chance or choice,
This is how we grow.
Apr 2022 · 81
Sensuous
Little drips of honey,
Trickle down your kiss.
Fingertips like
Water wells
That know my
Every wish.

Liquid lovely spilling,
Messing up my bed.
Whispering
Like fire burns
On every
Word that's said.

Tattered trails tasted,
You know my every turn.
Tracing lines
Like pathways
That you never
Had to learn.

Flowing, we are floating,
Suspended in the air.
Lifted up
Like stardust
Bodies weightless,
Minds aware.

Move me through the night,
Take me all the way.
Touching me
Like morning glory
Opens up
The day.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Apr 2022 · 115
Bones
I know you're there.
Deep in my bones,
I can feel you.

You're a written scripture,
On the ancient DNA,
Of my body of flesh, bones,
And impermanence.
It permeates,
Into any existence,
Where you and I,
Have hearts,
That beat.

I see now,
That I had to have it all,
Taken away.
Peeled back.
Removed.
So that all that was left,
Was me.

I never needed you.

You have an outdated version
Of me in your head.
And that's fine.
But I can't lie,
I'm pretty heartbroken,
That you'd leave me behind,
This time.

I thought you understood.
I guess...
I thought I knew you better.

I don't want to keep you.
I don't have a reason to.
Time and time again,
Your the constant,
That I always knew.
That simple kind of love,
That I never had to try to do.

But my trust in this truth...
This time - I handed you.

Of all the things I've had to let go,
You were the last.
And when you turned your back,
It was clear -
There really isn't,
Anyone,
To trust here.

And I don't mean that,
In some sad, bitter way.
I mean it to say...
I trust no one but me,
And what a beautiful scene.

My crystalline heart is,
No longer in hands that,
Bring me to places,
Too far from myself.

I am the only one that holds me.
This is how I'm meant to be.
More sure than I've ever been.
I've never felt more free.

But it's a funny thing,
That even though,
you can't be seen...

I can still feel you.

Deep in my bones.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
You're still a pretty thing to think about.
Mar 2022 · 113
From an Angel
You talk like being in love controls you.

Love is not meant to control you.

Love is here,
To show us radical acceptance.
To be trusted to be free, and
To have the freedom to trust.

Love shouldn't pull you away from yourself.

Love should bring you closer to you.

Are you afraid when you talk to them?
Or do you feel calm,
Well articulated,
At ease, with them?

Or do you feel anxious?

Do you feel like everything you say,
No matter what about,
Is always misunderstood?

Do you get embarrassed?
Frustrated?
Do you feel unseen?

This is because,
You are residing,
In a place
That is much too far
From you.

Sometimes, we have to walk away
From the things we love most, because...
By staying,
We are not listening to ourselves.
By staying,
We are not honouring ourselves.
By staying, we are saying:

"๐˜'๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ง๐˜ต ๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜ฎ๐˜บ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ง ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ด๐˜ฐ ๐˜ ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ญ๐˜ฐ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ."

...

All I ask is that this time,
You choose yourself.

So that the love that is meant for you,
Can find you.

โ–ช๏ธŽ micalight โ–ช๏ธŽ
Feb 2022 · 533
Bad Bliss
Fire burning red hot.
Who will be the next to burn?
Ignite a soul and light the way.
Okay.ย ย ย ย Now it's your turn.

In my mind like spring time.
Dew drops steam off the soft
Flowers they became upon.
I evaporate to high skies from
The ground I'm standing on.

Something of a bad bliss.
I stumble into your forbidden kiss.
And I feel like myself again.

For I am no Saint.
These words may be faint.
But to you, I'd lend my hand again.
It's you who I will lay again,
In the dangerous alley ways
Of my hidden places.

And when you come looking,
Just search in the shadows.

This is where I'll meet you.
Feb 2022 · 475
Palace
Crystalline Palace,
Wave to the other side.
Touch my mountain, high peak.
๐˜ˆ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ด๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ธ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ?
Hold your breath, cause
It's hard for us to know.
Though inside, it does reside.
We push through the unknown.
Awaiting your arrival,
My soul begins to float
In the glimmer of the moon.

My Angels Say You'll Be Here Soon.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Meet me in the moonbeams.
Jan 2022 · 357
Timeless
The waves tickle the shore,
Kissing the earth, reminding her
That she is loved.

The sand lives between
The rocks, gently holding and
Keeping them safe.

The trees whisper
Sweet nothings, that ring the
Chimes in my old soul.

And the mountains hug what I cannot.

The sun brings life to the day, and
Comfort in the dusk...
When it melts into oranges, pinks & golds.

Beams of safety coat the ocean.
Golden light washes over me, and
Penetrates my body.

That is when I see you there,
Letting the light lift you;
Dissipate you.

Right now, we are ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—น๐˜† energy.

We are timeless in our golden hour.

I never want to leave this daze.
Let's stay in this golden way.

'Cause it's pretty cool,
That we can stop time,
๐˜๐˜ด๐˜ฏ'๐˜ต ๐˜ช๐˜ต?

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
โ™ก
Jan 2022 · 227
Saudade
She calls and cries,
But there are only echoes
Bouncing on the walls
Of my empty chest.

She is forgotten.
She gets pushed aside.

๐˜ž๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฆ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ฅ?

.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Saudade, (n.): the longing to be near someone or some thing that is distant.
Jan 2022 · 359
SIDEREAL
Two stars collide.
They're beautiful -
Moving in,
Towards eachother.

You'd think it'd be a beautiful sight.
But when they touch a spark ignites, and
Up in flames goes everything we know.

๐˜ ๐˜จ๐˜ถ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด๐˜ด ๐˜ ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ...

My edges are crooked.
My corners are sharp.
My skin can be rough.
My heart can be dark.
For I am a mourner,
Of all of my lives.
Of all of the pain
That this heart has gained.

๐˜ ๐˜ข๐˜ฎ ๐˜ด๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ณ๐˜บ ๐˜ ๐˜ฅ๐˜ช๐˜ฅ๐˜ฏ'๐˜ต ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ ๐˜ข๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ...

I do miss you, and I hope
That you can see,
Behind all the trauma...
There is love. ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ถ๐˜€ ๐—บ๐—ฒ.

โ–ช๏ธŽmica lightโ–ช๏ธŽ
Choose company who can hold space for your demons, and you theirs, while you banish them together in solidarity. Know your tribe.

Sidereal, (adj.): determined by or from the stars.
Jan 2022 · 219
Mental Monsters
A riveting fracture
Of my current existence.
Clenching my throat,
Trying to squeeze out the dread;
The panic.

I've lost myself -
I don't know where I am, or
Where my body is.

Tense. Because
I'm trying so hard
Not to let go of myself,
Again.

"Keep straight.
Keep focused.
No.
Not like that.
Don't think ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜
About ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ต.
Don't be that way
About ๐™ฉ๐™๐™ž๐™จ.

It's okay.
Try to breathe.

You have control
Over your mind.

๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—น
Over your mind.

๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐—น
๐—ข๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—บ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ."

And it's okay
For a moment,
But the busy hands
Don't shield the silence
For long.

And through that
It comes spinning,
Entwining amongst
My conscious hardwiring.

"You are not welcome!
I don't want to believe it."

But I've been deeply imprinted
To believe
These emotional rules
Are bound to me.

So, often I break;
I give in.

The sheer loneliness
Of the thought
Consumes me.

I wait in the rain,
For when the storm dissipates,

๐˜”๐˜ข๐˜บ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ญ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ฏ.

โ–ช๏ธŽmica lightโ–ช๏ธŽ
Jan 2022 · 523
The Bullet
Tell me,
How do you walk
With all of that pain?

You move on this earth
Steady, going
For so long now
That you believe
This is
A part of you.

๐˜›๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ข ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ.

It sits, quietly
Draining your will,
Your connection.

๐˜›๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ข ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ.

It sits, numbing
Out feelings,
Causing friction.

๐˜›๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ข ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ.

It sits, waiting
For your eviction.

๐˜›๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ต ๐˜ข ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ฐ๐˜ง ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ.

So locate it, banish it.
I promise you, I swear
Oh, precious one,

You'll find that ๐™ฎ๐™ค๐™ช'๐™ง๐™š ๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ก๐™ก ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š๐™ง๐™š.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
Your trauma is not you, but in your mind.
So work that **** and love what's left behind.
Jan 2022 · 386
A Story Well Told
I open the book.
The first word reads,
"Destined."

Afraid,
I turn the page,
And I rest into restless text.

Lines and curves
Come together
Making the letters
That make the words
That make you, and
I start to fall in love with your adjectives.

As the story writes,
This astonishment I have of you
Was inevitable.

"๐˜›๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜บ ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฎ๐˜บ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ถ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ." ๐˜ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฌ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ฎ๐˜บ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ง.

As I read on,
Collected shapes
Come together
Forming the symbols
That create the words
That tell the story
Of what it's like for us to touch.

Seamless sentences
Flow through the pages
Floating our love
Down the river that is
This book.

This story is not for the faint of heart.
For there are rapids,
Rocks,
And falls
Along the way.

There are even times
When we both tried
To write ourselves
Right off the page.

But every time,
The pen just comes around to the other side of the paper.

"๐˜ ๐˜ฌ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด. ๐˜'๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ." ๐˜ ๐˜ฑ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ, ๐˜ฃ๐˜ถ๐˜ต ๐˜ ๐˜ค๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ณ๐˜บ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ.

Our love,
It separates and
Circulates before it
Gravitates us
Back together again.
And again.

Realizing now that this book is a constant.
That we've been written into the same story.
That we float down the same river.

And even when it
Splits in two
And I can't see you
I don't worry,
Because I know you're just
Some pages over,
Writing a part
Of your story.

"๐˜ ๐˜ด๐˜ธ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ณ ๐˜'๐˜ท๐˜ฆ ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ฅ ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฌ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ." ๐˜ ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ญ๐˜บ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ, ๐˜ฃ๐˜ถ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ๐˜ด ๐˜ต๐˜ถ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฃ๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ...

They talk about the times
When I couldn't find you
In the same chapter.

Periods when your name
Had not been seen next to mine
For so long,
I thought maybe
You found a way
To get the pen
Off the page.

Then just as I would
Conquer my rapids
And approach a place of calm,
Out of no where
You would float along.
And just like that
It felt like
You were never even gone.

United we float,
Our names in tow
Each with a pen
On the page
And a row
In the boat.
Writing the story that writes us.

"Where does this river go?"
You ask. And suddenly,
I know.

"This is where we have been headed along."

We silently drift to the end.
But the water does not fall,
Instead,
The river runs into a rising sky.
Flowing ribbons of crystal lace.
This is our meeting place.
We have been here once before.

Have we been enough?

Two souls,
With a thousand stories
Lived and told.

A thousand timeless masterpieces.

"๐˜ ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฎ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ." ๐˜ ๐˜ด๐˜ข๐˜บ,
"๐˜›๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ด ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜บ ๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ด ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฏ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ ๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ธ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ญ."
And that is when her heart began to swell.

Ancient stories locked
In our DNA, released
Into the universal sea.
And finally,
She could see
All the lessons
That she needs
To at last
Complete
Her healing.

๐—ฆ๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ด๐—น๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐˜ƒ๐—ถ๐—ฏ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜ ๐—ด๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ป.

And so it seems,
Our fountains are filled
With masterpieces
Lived and killed.
We will move into eternity.
This I know certainly.

๐™”๐™ค๐™ช ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™™ ๐™„ ๐™๐™–๐™ซ๐™š ๐™—๐™š๐™š๐™ฃ ๐™š๐™ฃ๐™ค๐™ช๐™œ๐™.

โ–ช๏ธŽ mica light โ–ช๏ธŽ
An Ode To An Ancient Love Story.
Dec 2021 · 340
Mรกgoa
On this day
That you left
I find myself here,
Feeling like
I'm not enough human
To fill this space.

Today marks a day
That we both let go
Of the parts of eachother
We knew we couldn't hold.

How I miss your soul.

And the comfort of the chaos,
In our eternal push and pull.

Today marks a day that
I chose right by myself.
It was the hardest thing to do,
Because it means I'm losing you.

But...

You forgot your shoes.

You know -
My favourite ones.
I wear outside when
I smoke in them.

โ–ช๏ธŽ micalight โ–ช๏ธŽ
To goodbyes.
To healthy endings.
To learning lessons.
Dec 2021 · 1.1k
Lascivious
S e x u a lย ย energy, invade me.
Permeate through my skin.
Sipping on sin
And tasting all the places
We've been.

S e x u a lย  energy, encase me.
Cover me in tongue.
Lust filled lungs
Breathe heavy til I come
Undone.

S e x u a lย  energy, envelope me.
Consume me in your grip.
Sip on my lips
And seal me with your
fingertips.

S e x u a lย  energy, enter me.
Arrive inside of me to find
My melting mind
Cascading into rivers,
At the bed side.
Nov 2021 · 682
Tame
Hiding. She's
Trying. I keep her
Confined.

Sleeping. She's
Weeping. She screams out her
Cries.

Falling. She's
Calling. There's pain in her
Eyes.

Dormant. She's
Latent. She feels
Paralyzed.

Shifting. She's
Drifting. But I keep her
Inside.

Uneasy. She's
Queasy. Yet I
Minimize.

Refracted. She's
Lasted. She cant be
Denied.

Bleeding. She's
Seeking. To be
Recognized.

Unwitting. I'm
Splitting. I say my
Goodbyes.

Heating. It's
Fleeting. My old peace of
Mind.

Conquered. I'm
Anchored. I'm treading
Neck-high.

Drowning. Heart
Pounding. My sight going
Blind.

Vehement. Not
Present. I am losing my
Pride.

Engaging. I'm
Raging. She's loud from
Inside.

Neurotic. I'm
seasick. From pain left
Behind.

Messy. We're
Heavy. There's blood on our
Lies.

Damage. I
Manage. This fall from up
High.

Numbness. Crave
Oneness. This banal state,
Mine.

Transgressing. Keep
shedding. And I'll find her
Smile.

Uplifting. Deep
Thinking. I tame what is
Wild.

ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  Releasing and healing
ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย ย  ย ย My own inner-child.

ย ย ย ย ย ย 
โ˜ผ Mica Light
Sometimes she comes gently. Sometimes she comes with force.

Vehement: marked by extreme intensity of emotions or convictions; inclined to react violently; fervid
Banal: obvious and dull; repeated too often; overfamiliar through overuse
Splitting: a commonly used defense mechanism for people with BPD that is done subconsciously in an attempt to protect against intense negative feelings such as loneliness, abandonment and isolation; sees in 'black and white'; no 'grey area'
Oct 2021 · 402
Ill at Ease
The ground is always trembling.
Bound to break beneath me.

A constant storm is brewing.
Don't know when it could release.

My body seeking safety.
There is no where to go.

The energy within me
is shaking, screaming "no".

Pressure from the inside out.
Skin bursting at the seams.

No wonder I am overwhelmed,
If this is how it's always been.

Mica Light
When there's nothing to do, no where to be, nothing I truly need... Why is that such a hard state for me to be?
Oct 2021 · 507
Borderline
In the morning
The sky
Is so beautiful.
The wind
sways the trees
And urges me
to dance.
The sun's rays
Shine with clarity
And the birds' songs
Invite the light.

I am at peace.

So.. I can be.

But,

Sometimes...

Swiftly...

Do you hear it?
There's a whispering...
Don't listen.
It's a trap.
There's no way.
There's no chance.

There it is again,
That fear.
The storm -
Here it comes.
Buckle down.
Id better hide.
Quick, try.
Before it sweeps
Me up too high...

But it's got my mind.
It's here.
Strong and loud,
This time.
And not slowly, but
Instantly, It
Sweeps,
Me,
Up.

I am thrown in.
I am lost within
A black space
With no boundary.
I can't find the edge.
And I've forgotten,
How,
To function.

I scream.
I collapse.
I cry.
I destroy.
I despise
Every bit
of myself.
And, still
I can't find
The way out of here.

The storm -
It thrusts
And sways.
Unsettles
And circulates.
Until it
Can no longer
Keep up
With demands.

The perpetual motion
Slows down,
And the winds
Begin to calm.
But the black
Smokey fog
Doesn't leave...

The dust
begins to settle
On top packages
Of self doubt,
Shame,
Guilt,
And worthlessness.

Then without warning
Gravity pulls me
Back
Into my body.
And in silence,
I am left,
Sifting through
What remains of me...
Shattered sorrow
Tired eyes, and
No light that I can see.

...

I am so angry
Because
The sky
Was so beautiful today.
And so was I.
But I wasn't bigger
Than the storm.

Not this time.

โ€ข Mica Light โ€ข
This poem reflects how my morning can go into a complete hell so quickly, I dont know how I even got there.
Jan 2021 · 460
Centuries of Shadows
She carries the weight,
As she tries to walk straight.
She cannot help but seethe.

Treading through mud,
And emotional blood.
Constantly trying to breathe.

The pain that she felt,
From the cards she was dealt -
Not knowing the reasons why.

The tears she would weep,
From a sadness so deep,
That echoes and amplifies.

For the rest of her life,
At the edge of a knife -
The slightest movement will ****.

"Keep calm. Keep steady.
Get with it already."
Or all that's distasteful will spill.

Behind all her mystery,
Is sadness and misery -
A truth she wants no one to find.

"She's magic" they'll say,
Before they run astray.
To this madness they won't be confined.

She will never be risen,
For her body's a prison,
Her mind, a bitter disease.

But they have a choice.
Without her, they'll rejoice.
They can live however they please.

Her soul is tired; heart is spent.
- Generational Torment -
Seeping from the past into each day.

Sifting through; righting what's wrong.
Hoping that her love is strong,
Enough for all the pain to be repaid.

Maybe one day, finally
A healed being she will be.
It's all she ever wanted all along.

She can't run from this existence,
But perhaps with some persistence,
Maybe she can finally belong.

She cries for you, she cries for me.
She cries for every long lost being.
She just wants the suffering to end.

A lineage of damage
On her plate to manage -
A lifetime of work to transcend.

Look past the hurt, beyond the pain.
It is clear what still remains:
The beginnings of a budding lotus flower.

This is nature, seeking nurture.
To this earth she needs an anchor.
This is the beginning of her power.

~ โ˜ผ ~
To healing. To responsibility. To connection.
Aug 2020 · 124
This Empty Street
The streets are full
With wandering souls.
The night sounds harsh
Lonely and cold.

I sit in silence...
Until it's broken by sirens.

Drunken drivers
Spin their tires
Windows open
Yelling, smokin.

Cats in heat.
Loud men who beat.
Hookers standing
Waiting, dancing.

Music pumping
Pulsing, thumping
Sloppy walking
Barely talking

Wandering, sleeping
Carrying all they're keeping
Searching for a quiet place
Tonight to call a safe space

....

The streets are empty
Of the love they need
The night needs light
So the dark can take flight

I sit in my safety...
I love my home greatly

Palace of peace
Hear the birds cheep
Plants thriving
Delicious dining

Crystals are blessing
Oils diffusing
My air is clean
My heart is keen

Love surrounds me
In the people with me
I guess I am lucky
I suppose i am free

The world makes me wonder
Thoughts brew like thunder
But forever I will always know
How grateful i am to live and grow.

....

In this privilege of mine,
my wellness i sow.

....
#downtown #late-night #contemplation #poem #poetry #micalightpoetry
Mar 2020 · 352
Dormiveglia
It is here, in this space,
When I feel most at ease.
I am not quite awake,
Yet not quite in a dream.

There is warmth around my body.
There is quiet in my mind.
My feet, they rub together.
Your lips, my mouth will find.

This is our querencia;
A place so safe for us.
I worry not of troubles.
I am only filled with trust.

It is here, I am at peace.
It is here, I am most safe.
Because nothing can break through,
The dream space we create.

I want to stay forever.
Please, can we never leave?
The sun is sure to come,
But with you, I want to be.

It is here, I am insouciant.
It is here, I can escape.
All the hardships of my life,
There is nothing it can take.

For here, I am protected.
I am safe in your embrace.
Together, falling in and out.
This dreaming-waking place.
Dormiveglia:the.space.that.stretches.between.sleeping.and.waking.
Querencia:a.place.where.one.feels.safe;a.place.from.which.one's.strength.of.character.is.drawn.
Insouciant:free.from.worry.concern.or.anxiety.
Jan 2020 · 296
The Work
It is often said that the light shines through the cracks to illuminate the darkness. While this is true and is the first step in identifying the darkness in oneself, that is all it does - simply lifts the veil. To transform, you cannot just bring the light to the darkness.

You must drag the darkness into light.
One of those thoughts.
Dec 2019 · 1.4k
Nervous
She's shaking.
Unstable.
For the taking.
Swallowed in fog.
Connection is lost.
She's cut off
From herself.
She's cut off.
Can't get out.
There is no where but here.

"Disappear. Disappear."
She whispers.

"I am here. I am here."
She answers.

"Tell me." He says,
"Tell me all that you dread."

And her fears spoke louder
Than anything ever said.
Inspired from learning about polyvagal theory and the feeling of being "stuck" in the sympathetic state (fight/flight/freeze) or dorsal (collapse). Speaking about where youre at can help you bring back ventral state to the foreground, the beneficial state, the ability to have connectedness at ease.
Aug 2019 · 731
Trepidation
Poetry trapped
On the walls.
Elusive lips
Make me fall.
Catch me for all
That i am worth.

A penny here
A fraction there.
What can you spare?
I feel impaired.
I feel,
Apart.

Like a silhouette
Of my own breath.
So many tests.
All wicked, no rest
As i search for my chest.

.


A mindset. A mentality.
A behaviour. A belief.

I must transcend so I can sleep.
Jan 2018 · 455
Coming home
I'm coming home soon
I promise you.

I almost there.
I am almost bare.

Cracking back open
Every part of myself.

Taking my love back down
From the shelf.

I miss you and I need you.
I'm coming home soon.

Cause I miss writing my soul to you.
A letter to myself. To missing writing. To coming home again. To clearing those blockages.
Feb 2017 · 487
The Question
Who am I?
Why am I here?
What am I doing?
When is the big break?
Where should I be?
And how do I get there?
Jan 2017 · 590
The Forgotten
It came again.
Breaching any boundaries
I was able to build since
the last time.

It shook me down.
Reminding of rampageous
Ways I had thought
I abandoned.

I lost control.
Misplacing my mind
with no idea where
to find it.
Sep 2016 · 2.9k
Ephemeral.
There is no rain to chase.
What is lost is lost.

There is no time to be retained.
What is lost is lost.

There is no gaining back what's gone.
What is lost is lost.

I only keep the memories
that have been embossed.


My body's stitched together with this chaos.
This poem inspired by the words of Honest Musings:
"When we hold people close, we also carry their past and everyone they have loved. Their stitches are ours, and every time they open: we sew them up. Every time their memories bleed, we soak the blood with our being.
Like forgotten toys, people stay in the rusty corners of our mind until one day something reminds us of them again. With a terrifying quietness, a sense of nostalgia pierces through everything we have ever been. I wish more of us knew how to be good at forgetting."
Jun 2016 · 788
For my Love.. <3
Your lips
Are bliss
Upon which
I land so
Gracefully
With every kiss. <3

As the moon loves the stars, and
as the sun loves the sky, and
as the shorelines love the ocean,
I Love You.
May 2016 · 1.5k
Almond Eyes
These weaving streets
pounding with
lovers' heart beats.

I know these things
tear you apart inside.

The way that we light fire to hearts,
And we burn them for the light.

These streets, they're pounding.
Drops of salty rain dampen the flame.
Fight the fire.
Burn up more of our desires.

Until desire runs out.
Until the fire dies out.

These wastelands, they're drowning.
What is left in wreckage is more than before.
Darker ashes.
Vaster endings.
And a heart-felt war.

As I sift the remnants of my love from this dust,
I whisper to the sky:
"Your almond eyes tell beautiful lies."
and I bury my heart goodbye.
Apr 2016 · 615
Chaos
I love you and all of your broken hearts.
I love all your post-apocalyptic thoughts.
I love every cigarette **** in your ashtray,
that stands for every self-reflecting moment you've had.
I adore the scattered truth of your bedroom.
And I love that your emotions haunt you so elegantly.
Break the thinking that imperfect is a thing.
And exit this dream.
**You were born to breathe in every bit of this chaos.
How could I forget,
for even a breath?

Slowly it slips
away into spaces
hidden in me
and I forget that it is there.

Watching over me.
Waiting on me.
To take it back into my lungs.
Into my eyes.
Into my touch.

Waiting for me
to expel it in every way
that I experience my daze.

This Universal Love...

My soul, it bathes in this
and yet,
my feet will step,
my body will move,
and my mind forgets.

๐˜‰๐˜ถ๐˜ต ๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ๐˜ฑ๐˜ญ๐˜บ ๐˜ ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ'๐˜ต ๐˜ธ๐˜ข๐˜ฏ๐˜ต ๐˜ต๐˜ฐ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ต...

I want to remember
all of those moments
when love was what carried me
over mountainous hurts;
through wastelands of self-hate -
self destructive tendencies
were buried by this
ever-knowing love.

And that is what brought me
this far.
That is why I've conquered
my war.
๐—Ÿ๐—ผ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ is why I know in
my heart.
That everything is beautiful,
๐˜ข๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ฑ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ต๐˜ด.

Universal Love
๐˜๐˜š existence.
And all parts
of my resistance
were so I could learn
of Love's persistence.

So,

May we never disregard the beauty,
simply because
our minds feels threatened.

May we see past the veils
that keep us guessing.

And may we remember:
We can find perfection
only in the definitive acceptance
of all that is,

๐™–๐™จ ๐™ž๐™ฉ ๐™ž๐™จ.

โ–ช๏ธŽ micalight โ–ช๏ธŽ
Feb 2016 · 475
Begin Again
Ocean tides bring breeze in to air.
The life of us is always fair.
Air pacing all around us, for us.
Inhale nature at its finest.
That's the purpose.
So live it.

Don't question why once more.
Swim your way to the shore.
Rest your head for it is sore.
And lay it on the earth -
This is your re-birth.
Drink from the well of yourself and begin again. - Charles Bukowski
Jan 2016 · 759
Immortal
I continue on these roads of life,
seldom knowing where I'm headed.
I simply search for the moments
I will remember in my old age,
with a satisfied glow and fulfilled heart.

My future self knows what my present self wants now.
So I listen to my angel's whispers,
passing clues from my lives abound;
& all dimensions that surround me.

My life tells a story
that has already been;
has never been,
and will be, all at once.

And so with this, I can be calm.
I am rested
in the embrace
of the tantalizing touch
of all that is,
will be,
has,
and has not ever been.

My essence is immortal.

I am all and none of these things.
& with this thought may tonight I sleep
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