I told you I love you
Because I wanted you to know:

To know that you can trust me
To know that you can find comfort with me
To know that you can love me.

I told you I love you.
You didn’t say it back.

But I knew you wouldn’t.

I just didn’t know
It would hurt this badly.

I cringe as you pin my hands to the bed.
I giggle nervously, not because of you,
But the thoughts in my head,
The little voice that tells me what not to do.

It isn’t the shock of your strength
Or your ever growing sensual desire.

It isn’t the smirk on your face
Or the wild delight in your eyes
That pushes us back a pace.

It is the fear and the pain,
And the better judgment
That runs through my brain.
It is my punishment.

I give in as your hand guides itself.
I may smile slightly, but because of you.
My mind begs for help,
But the little voice tells me what to do.

It is the security of your strength
And your ever growing passionate desire.

It the sweetness of your face
And the soft delight in your eyes.
That drives the pace.

It is the love and the lust,
And my need to please
That allows my brain to trust.
It settles my unease.

You can sacrifice me
To spare her,
But you can't spare her
To save me.

Drowning is the feeling
Where you can't catch a breath
Where your eyes fill with water
Where you can't resurface
Where your darkness surrounds
Drowning is the feeling
Of struggle
Drowning is
Where you make peace with death

Your presence is crepuscular.
In my  beating heart,
I feel muscular
When the twinkling starts.

Your infinite laughs
Absorb me like gravity.
Each humorous blast
Engraves the moons cavity.

Your ostentatious sense
Explodes like a super nova
With every chance,
But you're only my Casanova.

Your spirited eccentricity
Forces all into orbit
Causing the weather to become dusty
Taking my love from Mars to Jupiter.

I admire you as the sun,
Honoured to shine with your light.
Even as far as Pluto,
The sun would be bright.

Twisted tree trunks lay
On the black ashen soils,
Burnt to the ground
As the arid air boils.

The tiny creatures
Scurry far away
Abandoning their homes
For a new place to stay.

Entering the land
Which humans populate.
Entering streets
They thought were desolate.

Instead polluting machines
Roll across the earth,
Scaring plants to
Wilt to the hearth.

Grey puffy tails
Searching for nuts.
Forced to learn
What roads not to trust.

Little wild rabbits
Dig a hole in the ground,
To be soon blockaded
By a filthy garbage mound.

The birds flutter
From the burning tree tops
Only to be choked
By the brightly lit shops

Human’s running around
Not caring what goes where.
Driving large cars and polluting the air.
All causing our ozone layer to tare.

Smog filled air,
And trash filled land.
Leading to a filthy death
Shouldn’t these actions be band?

Yesterday,
Tender pursuits
Ordered
by shortened expression
And personal amusement.

Pleasure was channeled
by uncanny imagination.

Ignorance was developed
with years
of sheltered nurture.

Endeavors were focused
Through heartened dreams
Waiting eternities to age.

Today,
Life is starved of dignity,
Lead by the breath of humanity,
And trailed by my past.

Kindness overshadowed
by needless mockery.

Confidence diminished
Through thoughtless faults.

Purity saturated
with uncertain willingness.

Competence choked
from the flairs of society.

Tomorrow,
Independence is a necessity
Steered by Today,
Speckled by yesterday.

Motivation should dictate
my verdicts,
And challenge perils.

Agonies lifted
Through sanguinity

Virtue grown
Only through praise
From the satisfaction of many.

Yesterday, today, tomorrow
Immersed in today
Is the root of my future.

They say,
when you're depressed
You can't look ahead

All I think
Is can I give up now?
I've learned one thing
Waiting lasts
Much longer than they say
And it's never
The end

I've never been good at
Decisions
But I've always had
Opinions

Finally
I make a decision
To share my opinion

This one opinion
Has made so much commotion

So much fuss
From my little opinion

Now I have reason to fear
Decisions

She's only a girl,
Why bring her such pain?
She's watched him suffer.
He brought her down.

It's her fault he said.
It's not her fault they said.
I love you he said.
We love you they said.

They said forget about him.
They said let him be.
He said I can't forget you.
He said please don't leave me.
He said I'm sorry.
He said I'll die.
They said he is faking.
They said it's all a lie.

They didn't know.
He didn't know.
She didn't know.

She said she'd help him heal.
He said I love you.
They said he doesn’t love you.

Please stop
She cried.

He said he needed her.
They said it was bad for her.
They said it made her unhappy.
They said it's not her fault.
She said it is my fault.
She said he needs me.
She said I can't leave him.

They said he has gotten to her.
They said he is fine.
They said he wants attention.
They said it's been too long.
She said they are wrong.

I'm afraid
She cries.
I need help
She cries.
They say you need help.

He says I'm afraid.
He says I need help.
They say forget him.
They say you come first.
She says I can't.

She says she's fine
As she cries

I feel his hands rubbing up  and down me
I lose focus and my thoughts run freely
Free to the awkward  way his lips hit mine
The contact making me laugh every time
Free to the tight grip I have on his hand
The squeeze given in response to our bond
Free to the warm embrace pulling me in
The touch clearing the room to me and him
Free to be okay
Free to be loved

Shall I behold a glimmering stone heart?
You act as harsh as a white swan
But still I admire you as pure art
Longing for your cold eyes to gaze upon
Waiting for our bold stares to align
Your voice as pure as a string symphony
Gently speaking from your cruel tainted mind
Evading my hearts euphony for thee
You are beastly to overlook this love
I cannot bear to stand this misery
You would fit with me like a woolen glove
But I know you do not agree with me
We will never be an adoring pair
So my deep love we cannot ever share

Rough weathers crossed our currents,
Ever so softly,
We drifted together

Harsh currents brought me under
Your wave’s soft lips helped me to surface

Curious waters dunked me below
Again
And Again
With each
Resurfacing became harder
Tides only dropping me
Deeper
And Deeper

Fluttering arms would rise
Reaching for you
But I loosen my grip
In hopes you could already sense my SOS
I learnt what I could not expect
With enough strength I  learned to save myself

I still suffocate
As the water settles
It grows
Harder
And harder
To wait
Yet, I wait
And wait
For the final wave of
The final storm to pass
Realigning our streams

You want the cube
We have the cube
Sam has the cube
Its on the building
Optimus Prime was to sacrifice
destroy the cube
Cube Power
Destroyed
MegaTRON