oh god i just wish i'll be something you'd miss

my mouth will never open
as these feelings overflow
the three little words
sit heavy in my throat

you were barely mine
but it's like
i've already
lost you

ive tried to forget how i feel
ive tried to convice myself to stop
fantasizing about things that wont ever happen
and how this love probably isnt real

i can write your name into my skin over and over
but it doesn't matter how many times i translate these feelings into verses
and convert my longing into lines

i can never write myself into your story

i'd like to kiss you

but i can't bring myself
to lean closer

in fear of
tasting all the things
you won't tell me

Maybe it won't hurt as much when he leaves
because I am so used to loving him from a distance
Across the hall
Across the room
There is still so much distance even
When he is right in front of me
When my mouth sputters words that try to pull him closer
There is always so much distance
Even when I am pressed against him
With our arms wrapped around each other in a hug
I can never seem to get close enough
But like I said
I am so used to loving him from a distance
I guess a few more thousand miles won't hurt

is finding out
you think of someone else
as much as i do you

there is plenty of time in the world,

just not enough for us

months after, her heart still bled.

he was as beautiful
as he was cold

I've written so many pieces
about how i long for you
and how i want to be near you,
how beautiful you are
but all these verses are simply pathetic attempts
to make sense of my feelings
and each poem
is just another version
of me saying *I love you

even after we're through
i've made us permanent
long after our feelings have died
my heart will still beat in these poems
and i will still be the starry eyed girl stealing glances in each verse
and in 10 years time
i may see you again
and my head won't buzz, my stomach won't tumble, my cheeks won't flush
but these pages
are proof
that they once did.

You’ve spent
so much time smashing
     your own reflection
all there’s left to walk
     on is broken glass.

how many times do i have to pour my heart out until a drop of blood might finally land on your cheek?

i want more than just a glimpse of your mind
more than just another hi
talk to me
no need to be subtle
your voice is enough to turn my rigid parts supple

but I can't heal the way
                           I feel about you

I watch you like a hawk

I watch you like I'm gonna tear you
                limb
                      from
                             limb

Will the hunger ever stop?
Can we simply
          starve
                    this
                sin?

in june i'll wish for
rain. i know you're leaving soon
i still wish you'd stay

nothing on
  my mind
but
   you

constantly
weighed down
by things i still
hold on to

can
       i  
         even
                                     complicate
                                               your
                                                    breathin­g?

let me sleep

       and never wake

"people are temporary"

"so is pain"

He was her 11:11 wish, still.

maybe if we were different people,
maybe then we'd be right for each other

i don't think that even the most parallel of universes would've done the trick

you remain lightyears apart
even as we lay side by side

"do i ever even cross your mind?"

"you've never left."

i know perfectly well how to swim

but if you were an ocean
i'd drown on purpose

I do not wish
for a happy ending.
I simply wish
for it all to end.

there is a difference
between two people in love
and
two lonely people who are together

i fell for you
when you weren't looking,
but
i loved you
when it was too late

you don't love me
but i can pretend
in time, we'll finally see
even the deepest scars can mend

i think i still love you despite everything
how i wish you hurt me harder

actually
*******
im not sorry
*******
*******
*******

everything i do
i do to impress you
everything i say
i say hoping you'd hear
wherever i go
i go to for i know
you're near
you're near

i know i shouldn't give up on myself
i don't want to give up on myself
but
its just
too
*******
hard