I've been told I can be
loyal but distrusting
sometimes even vengeful
with a mouth as sharp as a stinger
I've always known myself to be
resilient with psychic intuition
almost by fault
that of an eagle soaring above adversity
I know I am me
channeling my innate wisdom & burning passion
transforming for the better
much like a phoenix rising from the ashes
Turn the lights off so that I may know you
In this safe space, I invite you to indulge in our mutual vulnerability
Feel protection in my arms as I guard your heart
As I keep it warm between our chests
Set your gaze to mine while you share with me your aspirations
I yearn to experience them through the windows to your soul
Share with me your fears so that I may put them to rest
May this bed be a holy and sacred place for us
May this bed be our confession booth free from ridicule
May this bed be a tithing basket for you to receive love with no boundaries
In this bed, allow divine pleasure to overwhelm you
Let your orgasm match the depth of your trust
Let your tears turn to sweat that trickles down the valley of your spine
Let your bodily fluids baptize you; cleanse you of any guilt
Share with me your spiritual awakening
As I receive communion with your raw, unfiltered, liquified emotion running down your body
Toss out your bible, for the only religious text I need is your diary
Allow me to tie every inch of your glorious body to a memory
I wish not to fuck, but to love
I wish to fulfill all your fetishistic urges
For I know they are tied they are tied to a psychological yearning
By the end of the night I wish to know every inch of your flesh
I want the knowledge to be accompanied by the memories that make you, you
And if I fail, there's always round two after we cuddle
Sink or swim.
Time is thin.
Months to go.
I can't breathe in.
In you weave.
Your deep regrets.
Balls in my court?
That's all you can say.
Boy's games are child's play.
They think they're cunning.
They believe they're smart.
But they fuck with poets.
They play with art.
Girls you see,
We play for keeps.
Close your eyes... go to sleep.
But some day we'll realize how different we are
Some day you'll be on top of some other girl, you don't know it yet
But I do.
She'll be like you, and better for you, and you'll be better for her
It'll be simple and easy and you'll spend the rest of your lives together
Sure, every once in a while you'll lie awake, missing my mystery and the beauty that darkness creates
You'll know that this new girl will never know you like I knew you
You don't know this yet honey, but I do
I am here
through all of your pain
through all of your crying
through all of your tears
I am here
Made for you to love
Made for you to cry on
Made for you to die for
I am here
Taking all of your fears
Breaking walls with destiny
Making your world full of peace
Teaching you love
I am here
Even when you hate me
Even when you leave
Even when you hurt me, emotionally
I am still here
Here to hold you close
Here for all your mercy
Here to show you love
Here to hear your cries
Here to hear you whys
Here to love you more
I am still here
Here for all of eternity
Here for only you
Here to make your life worth while
Here to make you amused
I am here
I am still here
I will always be here
I will never leave here
I am here
She was never yours to keep, yet
You think you want to love someone,
The moment you're feeling down,
The moment you see her smile and weep;
Dress her in red, I'd tell you,
Red like her lips, red as her mouth.
Your heart beats ever faster,
That's something that you could never ever doubt.
There are sayings you couldn't veer away from
Like a rudder gone pointless because of a storm.
The waves will trash, blunt and torment you,
Until your resolve has been steel formed.
Two strokes to midnight, gone she has been.
Too far from your reach, crossing no lines in between
Her head and your heart;
This was a pointless fight but a deadly thing.
Alcohol shouldn't have drowned you in a stupor,
Nor would the fumes of gas sticks dangling on the lip.
It should have been her bright eyes, her perfume
Or the little things she had let you keep.
She should have been there,
In your worst and in your best.
She could have still been the same one
Who carried the demons you ripped from your chest.
Your dark eyes cloud even more over,
Even if your face is calm and serene.
Then you simply watched her drift away
As you let yourself fade from the scene.
You are in love, I know it plain as day.
But who are you to change someone's mind,
If you were never even a part of it,
If she never even let you have a say?
I'll tell you again, dress her in red,
In the color your heart rages in,
The color of danger you revel and been
The color that makes you want to sin.
Dress her in red,
Like blood smeared on a white wall.
It would be the same color you'd take
If you stepped off and lead yourself to a fall.
Innocence will soon turn into dust -
Because in this game, we all have to pass.
Fail and lose, or win and take,
We never could be sure if it would last.
These last two questions
Now baffles me to the core.
If you read this, then I'm sorry,
I couldn't have said it before.
But what am I to you,
If I seem to be the one you turn to
When I'm not her,
When I could never be her.
Dress her in red, a color you'd always remember;
Something, everything that gives you a zest.
But please don't always let me pick up your bloody pieces
And take them back to the dark recesses of your chest.
Your gaze holds me back in fervor,
And I'll still want you to be okay.
Don't you dare dress me in red,
If she's the one you want to stay.
You must understand my fear
As I grow closer to you dear
No more bite or insurrection
You penetrate the armour
Hard covers but tender underbelly
Be gentle in your stroke
Red welt of swollen lips
Let the blood fall as it may
You are the light in my everyday
& crawl over blistering heat
You seek, you sting
Sharp penetrating glance
Venom glistens like the dewdrop
Do drop & Let drop the droplets
Wet hard the mind fuck
Stinger in brain
Dark obsidian, your poison sings
Your armour penetrating dance
Brings me back
Crawl to me
Your poison venom
The venom inside me
No antidote or logic
No rhyme or reason
Your venom sings
Eyes blind and heart bleeding
I am your zombie baby
Play with me
Again and again.
℗© 2016 by Lesley Wood
Eager flesh finds ways to claw in memories when nails are stripped to the skin.
Find pieces left with torn edges like tragedies but don't let your demons in.
Weave vines through your ribs and roses through your eyes, for this life you'll have to fare.
Cemeteries feel so empty without your bones to bare.
And I beg you to bury the parts of yourself that remain unclean.
I only want your sin if its in between my sheets.
Today I had a writer's dream
Challenged to create a scene
Shall I write some poetry
Release let it flow from me
If I had a knob to turn
All the way I'd let it burn
Molding letters with my tools
A creator doesn't follow rules
Definitions all in the mind
Meaning some will never find
A story that is born from me
Stolen moments of reality
As a writer I do the work
Reporter of the daily dirt
Putting soul into the lines
Insanity speaks in rhyme
Makes no sense so it seems
Waking from a writer's dream...
In last night’s episode, a feeling washed over me
Lonely and alone, I broke down
And within those few moments of emotional inertia
I wept for everything and everyone;
For Prince and Bowie and all the others
For the planet
For my loved ones
and all of their problems I can’t solve
But not for myself, I wouldn’t allow it
I deny myself everything I need;
A person to love and be loved by
A shoulder to cry on
Permission to be weak
Help when it’s needed
A part of me died
and I reflected on how trivial it is
always making things difficult for yourself
Questioned why my life is so hard
As if it’s all some joke everyone is in on
They’re laughing and rooting against me
while I fall back down each time I get back up
Does anyone understand what it’s like in my shoes?
How can they when I don’t let anyone in?
Hell, I don’t even understand my own weary soul
So star crossed and aimless
and pulled in every direction
Searching….searching….unable to find solace
Looking for home in people and places and things
Put a noose around my heart,
hung it for all to see
There is no love for one so smart and strong
There is no place for one so resistant to belong
There is no hope, or so it seems
Impatiently waiting for someone to prove me wrong
To cut these ties
To free me from myself
To make me feel alive
Because damn it, I’m just like a beautiful flower
I thrive in the right environment
I will flourish and bloom
and grow into the best version of myself
Stable, no insecurity
My fruits will nurture you in return
I will love you like you’ve never been loved before
Baby, the brightest diamonds and pearls are made over time
The future’s gonna be good to me
Chin up, buttercup -
with death comes new life