I got a case of the Blues
And they're bogging me down!
I breathe
I move
I listen.
Yet nothing's changing now.

What do you do when you got the Blues, and nobody knows your plight?

Do you yell and scream?
Ask for help?
Or choose to take on the silent fight?

I gotta case of the Blues, but darling, you need not worry.

They should be gone in due time,
But for now, they're in no hurry.

the leaves are rustling outside of my bedroom window, kissed half with sweet sunlight, and half with death.

the branches, broad, and bows dancing, twinkle the leaves; entrancing.

the roots are deep, steadfast, and true.
unlike the man I thought I knew.

I used to think I would never be the same, that my world and life would be forever in a deficit from our time together. But the truth in life is that the only happiness to be obtained is entirely up to you. I have found that what we shared was love, is love, and will always be love. Not because I want it to be, but because it simply is. We simply are. Just because I have not met someone that has reflected the same love back does not mean I never will again. But I know now that no matter what, I will always have you. You will always be on my side. And I will have no problems or worries in my life knowing our love will keep me alive, while we lead two lives apart. Not by choice, but because not all love is meant to be shared, but rather, realized.

To love—
Is to trust someone with matches,
As you play in puddles of fate.

The only thing burning in this August heat is my mind rewinding our time; repeat

The only thing burning in this August heat is my mind rewinding our time; cease

You told me I'm a rare one;
you could see it in my clear, blue eyes.

You want to see where it goes;
you're genuine, sincere: you can't lie.

You guessed my insecurities,
as I laid naked,
in the candlelight,
by your side.

I asked you how you felt:
the moonlight blinded your thoughts.

Yet nothing needed to be spoken.
You and I, we're just...alive.

I fancied the idea
Of you needing me
Just a few days
Turned into most nights of the week
You showered me with love
And adoration I craved
But the tables have turned
Now you're the one who's sane
Your love is my drug
I could take every night
To drift away to sleep
And greet morning light...

i stare at the moon
gallantly hovering amongst the stars
knowing, hoping, wishing
you aren't just as far.

the Moon smiles back
slowly, and all at once.
diminishing my fears--
inside, I blush.

for the stars, like me,
play hide and go seek.
but the Moon always knows
the solemn secrets i keep.

Sanity is
What tears us apart
Makes us question our wrongs
And what's right from the start

Sanity is
The "moral high ground"
The place we must be
Without it, we drown

Sanity is
The reality we seek
The blunder free life
So trivial, it's weak

Sanity is
An enticing prospect
But now I must locate—
My mind, because I've lost it

I miss waking up to you in the morning sun

That beams and shines through the pane--touching your eyes.

You await for me to awake
With your soft, subtle, grace.

A lonely man still wakes in the morn,
I miss waking up to you
My kindred soul.

I long for the day we will meet again
On some beach somewhere-
       heaven sent.
Where time is only counted by
       moments spent with you.
And the entrancing summer breeze,
       keeps us anew.
The days and nights will melt to one.
And moments forever linger-
       they'll never be gone

my heart excites at the thought of what could be-

yet all I know, is fateful retreat.

I'm stuck in a snowdrift
That you led me to
No place to take shelter
No reason to
I'm stuck in a snowdrift
But you're not by my side
You left me to freeze
You left me to die
I'm stuck in a snowdrift
Memories dance in my mind
I'll be okay my baby
Our love will keep me alive.

There comes a time
When your choice of words
(Is really all you own)
But even more powerful
Than words you choose,
Is the silence
(that chills you)
To the bone.

That's it; the stare.

Knowing I was done for,
     right here, right there.

Your eyes mesmerized my paralyzed life.

And gave me the courage to not blink once,
     but twice.

The sweet gust of flame
comes and tickles my nose,
the scent of the same candle
we will both always know...

I wonder what you're up to,
when I look at the moon,
like the slightly cloudy nights
when I was standing beside you...

Like the flame that flickers
as the candle is soon to go out,
my love for you fluctuates
from distant memories, to now...

What clouds my thoughts most,
is not the web we wove,
but how we should move forward,
in this garden of thorns.

To pretend we're both happy
would be deceiving to both;
Should the rose be cut for pleasure?
Or should the rose be left to grow?

You seem to have mastered
The art of yo-yo-ing hearts.
I doubt you'd say the same
Because to you,
it's a game from the start.

I look at the sad, aged rides outside of grocery stores every now and then. It wasn't until recently that I knew why they drew me in so much–they reminded me of my love life. Always too open and available for the ride, with a menial return and reward. Never a soul that got on cared for the old ride, and began to walk past it's haunting exterior. But there's always one boy, that will always ride that ride; over and over and over until he simply runs out of time, or something to provide. But, the joy, in that child's eyes, with his soul soaring high, only for a few moments; that is love. And that is what I will always have to remember.

Who then could be called sane
When facing love's deathbed?

When did you get to decide
when
my
heart
*beats

Everytime I love; I lose.
A piece of me, is forever with you.
Leaving me spotty and holey and broken in some parts--
Forcing the next, to love from the heart.

This doesn't make me weaker or less than before--
But rather more open, to love greater,
To love more.

My desire for you
(only builds)
when you run away.

42.
Aged, but not old.
Handsome, but not boyish.
Passionate, but confused with this.

22.
Young, but wise.
Beautiful, but naïve.
Quiet, but not stupid.

20.
Years between us.
Does it matter? Said my brain
Let me speak. Replied my heart

3.
Months together.
No more.
No less.

0.
Time has stopped.
And what do I see?
A happily puzzled face,
Looking back at me.

Is the greater evil in that of knowing?
Or is the lesser evil in the known?
To know the difference would be a delight,
but alas for now, I say goodnight.

I sleep
I keep
My dreams (of you)
Are all (I seek)

Let me into your eyes-
Those honey brown, forever bright eyes.

And into your soul I shall ponder
What in the world it is I saunder.

I'm gazing into eternity,
A vast, empty, void.

I'm gazing into my future,
Filled with hopes and joys.

I'm gazing into my reality,
And ever changing scenes.

I'm gazing into your eyes,
And finally, I can see.

To this day I know not why I don't take my own advice.
It's as if I thrive on the turmoil and rainy day parade I create.
There is no cure for hopeless optimism in Love;
Only the realization that some things are meant to be eternal
In a different way. In a dreamland.

So instead of being the one to be heartbroken,
I have chosen to be the one who tears down another's world.
I shatter the dreams I long for. I am the one that gets the final say.
It's a different kind of high-to finally become the pedestal from which I knew I should have been on the entire time.

I can't say the view from where I stand in my mind is clear, or better.
I can't win in the game of Love. But in the game of War, I am cruel at heart. Cruel in a way that is honest, in fact, not cruel at all. I wonder some days if the passive voice inside my head is actually my sense of worth, escaping the quicksand that it's been under for far, far, too long.

I have a frostbitten heart
Piercing chills run through my veins
Nothing left to warm me
Nothing to take back the pain

I have a frostbitten heart
And I have an inkling as to why
The girl you used to know
Has died, all at once, inside.

It's a full moon tonight,
My favorite night each month.
Because all the faces hiding in the dark,
Are illuminated at once.

I have not one, but two Hearts
Residing inside my chest.
One is on the brink of falling;
Madly and deeply in love with you.
And the other,
Has one foot,
Precariously out the door.

I can see it in your teardrop eyes-
That hesitate to look away.
I can feel it when you grab me closer
When I'm half asleep.
I can hear it when you trail off,
And exhale all your worries away.
This thing they call love
Isn't fleeting,
For with me it shall stay.

have you ever sat and thought about life?
not with the scores of metaphors

but of the lives and deaths of the past and the present.
what will become of your stardust bones?

once lost in space, now grow (and grow).

Love me?
Touch me?
Kiss me?
or
Remain a stranger?

You rattle me to my core.
i tremble;
i fear;
what I desire-
is what you desire.

I mustn't question the journey
I could never conceive a way
Until the day you entered my life
And all my worries went away

I catch myself, at times, stuck inside my thoughts and dreams...

For my dreams are where we're together forever—

Where I can create anything for the time being.

I dream of smiles everlasting,
And creating bundles of joy.

I dream of our lives together,
Intertwined for all time sake.

I dream of no one else's arms
Otherwise my heart would break.

I dream of growing old with you
Forever gazing in your eyes...

I dream of staring into eternity
Without ever saying goodbye.

I dream of nobody else anymore
For you have seemed to make—

My dreams are all I desire to have
So please, never let me wake.

To you, my true, my sweet--
Your love once kept me safe
In the misery I keep.

Your touch, like fireflies,
On a warm Winter's night,
Now hangs in the hollows
Of the dreams I hold inside.

The sun may beam and glow
Day by Day
But without you by my side,
I only see the looming clouds;
Gray. Gray. Gray.

You made me love you
Don't you see?

there is still love after your death
that trickles from my tears
and the sound my string quartet makes
from the symphony where my heart once lay.

there is still life after your loss
though the flowers aren't quite as vivid
and the way the sun beams peak from the clouds
no longer chokes up a sense of joy, but sorrow.

there is still chaos from the clarity, that was you--
no matter the love
no matter the life
and no matter the heartbeat, it's not you.

no joy will suffice like the melted time
and melted lives we once knew.

and--
if there is still love after your death,
why must the sun run from the moon?