The spell you cast took me by surprise
you hypnotized me with those come hither eyes

I wanted you, that feeling I couldn't give away
but in my head you took root, most likely to stay

I stayed to myself for awhile, that May have been a mistake
because now a lot of my attention you're starting to take


you're like a hip-hop song, smooth, flowing and classic
to pleasure you for the night, I'll take measures ever so drastic

I'm like Gangrel I burn hotter than a ****** of devil my damphiric killer instinct runs deep into my soul mending bending and twisting what you think is a weakness dents in the armor I bring to battle I go to war on the floor while your rhymes **** more than a who're symphonic with the flow so solid like onix lyrical high like I spit the chronic hits like a **** leaving hoes wetter than a just washed thing what's wrong didn't think that the kid brought bars if you stand before me you'll fall before me I known you abhor me but ya girl adores me like loose leaf or sweet leaf Osbourne I'm still sore from last night another fight slept with another dudes wife I bring trife strife and drama enforcer like a flying saucer animated like flip o rama 
Cranberry ***** harder than a just busted cherry it's scary what I do to this microphone it's my own when I'm in the zone 
*drops

They say the mind bends to deal with the challenges one faces in life...
In this case my mind and cxck were bent to her.. although I knew she was someone's wife
It was deeper than a soul connection. Something darker not pure
Was it love?.... Lust?.. I just wasn't sure
It went deep and strong resonating within. I lost all control just seeing him
I guess I should tell you about her... She's a nurse at the home I'm RELAXING IN! She's always very kind to me... I'm not sure where to begin... I remember when we met.. it was like yesterday
It was a warm summer's evening... And into my room she swayed
I came walking in and there he was. Sitting to the side with demons behind his eyes. It all started there this inexplicable feeling. The sight of his green hair sent my heart reeling.
I laughed at this slender nurse.. blonde hair just as I always cared for
"They say your first time you never forget I'll make it memorable, are you familiar with my lore?"
His laugh, oh his laugh it drew me in closer. He enticed me, he lured me as he wove his sweet tale.

I told her one of my many stories
I can't really remember my past
But Lord how she drew me in with that enticing figure behind the class

His past was confusing twisted and dark. But we all have our secrets that with we cannot part. It was insanity with lust that took over just then. When I asked him to stay AMD let him within.
I looked in surprise "Arent you not supposed to interact with the inmates?"
"Yes but no" I said in reply. "There is something about you I cannot deny."
Turning on the old charm I replied "Well we do have some more time together... Let's explore our twisted minds!"
There we stayed together breaking the rules. We laughed in hysteria like two crazy fools.
I laughed and for the first time I was sad leaving therapy


What we had shared was in rarity. Being without him ripped me of clarity. I hatched a wicked plan my win twisted fantasy
It's a crazy ambition by crazy minds...
But an accomplishable one I'm sure you'll find
I was transferred to solitary after a situation in the lunch room
I just carved a guys eyes out, was that really worth putting me in a padded room?
When I walked into therapy he wasn't insight .
That's when Iearned of his terrible plight. Madness and hysteria came from within. This couldn't be happening no not to him.
I searched and I searched but he couldn't be found. But I heard the most beautiful sound. His manical laugh shook the walls. It's reverberation carried me down the halls.
She walked into the room and saw me in my strait jacket
Her body so clean.. ugh I just had to have it
I was already crazy before I met this girl
Now this... This was twisting my world
This girl, so calm, yet confident in her approach
Clearly figured me out quicker than most
I don't remember my past but I knew she'd be in my future
Right here And now, I had to make love to her
Somehow, some way she got what I was getting at,
She helped me out of my cloth prison, the filthy straitjacket
After getting out of my jacket I walked over and kicked the door
After taking off our clothes I pinned her to the floor
"Now I know your a doctor but I have my own medicine to prescribe"
"Oh please Mr J! Take me like a bride!"
So I ****** a nurse in the padded cell wing
 And she broke me out of the asylum from within
"What's your name dear nurse?"
"Call me.. Harley Quinn!"

He's isolated on a distant world
Far away from what we know
He's gone and left his favorite girl
He's marooned just to show

How life can curve and twist away
To bend and shaped and shift
Though some would have life the same always
To avoid an emotional rift

Between me and you what we both hold
Dear to us and hpw we are the same
Though shooting stars may break the mold
Our hearts aren't to blame

For hurting when we hurt, crying when we cry
Breaking when we break and lifting us up high
For changing when we change for holding us in check
And for when we are nervous jumping up to our necks

Stop placing a mask over your feelings keep trying to break the glass ceiling you've placed on your dreams
It seems as if your harsh criticism has locked your thoughts down in a dream bending prism turning them into broken thoughts and shattered ideas the tears of your subconscious are clogging your brain stem
So be honest with yourself and them

Stop the masquerade

Maybe I don't sleep with anything with a pulse
maybe I don't 15 kids in the vault
maybe I'm not what people expect me to be
maybe I'm different... isn't that crazy?
Maybe I'm not for a one night stand
maybe I want to around my girl build plans
maybe I want to take long walks on the beach
build sand castles, sit around and snuggle while we watch movies

Maybe I'm sorry, I'm a helpless romantic
I want to do this for someone and it drives me almost pedantic
I mean I'm the yin to an jerkoffs yang
maybe I just need to get out more
come back to my house smelling like *** and regret, or just become a manwhore
I mean the nice guy act may have been good 5 or ten years ago...

Maybe I have to be an ***, that's the only way to go

A megaphone is a device
Used to amplify sound, most commonly speech
Into the ears of the masses gathered around
Usually in an act of protest.
It's an electrically powered portable amplifier
But I don't possess one.
Not yet, anyway. But I know someone who does.
Someone who's shouts of frustration cause pity and anger at the same time.
The person I'm living with, isn't that divine.
I'm stuck between sympathizing and bewildering blind fury
Her condition is not through fault of her own but surely
She can stop taking her frustrations and misplaced aggression out on me.
I wish I knew how to stop her pain, stop her anger.
I wish I could do that without it destroying me.
And, mother I doubt you'll read this but on the off chance that you do.
I love you. But I don't know what else that I can do.
I'm learning to carry a house hold on my shoulders, and I can't do that if you keep taking crowbars to my knees.
But, I fear it might be too late that that fact is what you'll see.

Don't get my hopes up
Because that'll only lead to you getting shot down after your endorphins dope you up
My mind and chest cavity are closed up
Don't forget me
Don't forget
Don't
Get
Expectations set on anyone
That'll lead to being shot in the head
And fate pulling the trigger
Or your soul burning like ******* in ether

I'm 20 years old now
And I've seen technology advance and what happens when socialites go wild
and I've been mulling this over for awhile
I began to understand why the older generations hate us and always rely on poorly researched "Truths" to debate us.

It's because of how much the world has changed.

The world has changed and immeasurable number of ways since way back in the day
From the rise of the Internet from a finicky gimmick to a major uncut media outlet
And so quickly it seems as though some rewinding is needed to some, in a manner most drastic


However progress is needed even though it is a slow and painful process, whether it be in the church or out on the streets everyone's ideas deserve to be heard no matter how bizarre because that's how we remain so unique

If i could travel
Inside my mind
I truly wonder
What would i find?

Would the dreams I've had
Come back to haunt me?
The figments follow
And successfully stalk me?

Would i hear the music i
Listen to constantly
Or would i see these poems forming
And being put together miraculously?

Would i see Animals, my emotions, my
Opinions and most wretched thoughts
Personified and take horrific shapes?
Or would i remain an imagination fueled man,
And simply drive myself to be great?

Sometimes I look in a mirror
and my own eyes crack open
the weakness falls from outside the ducts
because every time I look my heart is broken
why? to be more accurate I'm sick.
both physically with this **** cold I can't seem to shake
and of myself, because it seems to be my fate
I want to reinvent, recreate myself in a whole new way
I want to be a leader, not just more dead weight
A burden, that's what I've become
I can't even write anymore without a mentally loaded gun
to the side of my head, I have to bully myself to write things down now
somehow I need to try again and find out
where I went wrong where my confidence and pride has gone
it's been too long since I looked at the mirror and tears didn't fall

Misguided
misdirected
I'm looking
with no reception
My path is blurred
This must be absurd
I know I have a path
but I can't see it all yet
I know it's bumpy
And slippery when wet
but I don't know where it goes
I don't know what it shows
it's this feeling of uncertainty
that sends chills down my spine and worries me
Will I ever mage something of myself
Will I ever accrue some degree of wealth?
Will I ever live without diminishing health

These are all questions which I can't answer
it worries me and hurts me to think that I should have to.

Now I didn't wanna have to through you under the bus
but it's like now your heart is dead and you're living on sour spite and rotten pus
it's torturous to be so loved and hated the same time by my own family no less I guess that's why they say blood makes you related but loyalty is what makes us family it's sad to be the victim of your cruel jokes and biting sarcasm I can only take so much before my brain starts to spasm at this point I'd drop you into and endless chasm before ever even thinking about you again you hurt me too many to times to try to smooth things over with you again my friend go **** an egg and crack the shell then you'll know what you do to me everyday can't you tell I'm a different human being, I'm my own brand of crazy
what I call organization you call lazy

Good evening reader
The world is rotting, you can see the decay
Humans get more restless, you can see it everyday.
Killing, depression, despair, it grows worse all the time. frighteningly so
So in this document is information that you need to know
Your mission, dear reader, should you choose to accept it
Is to take charge of good karma, love your fellow man and protect them
And where you see hurt in this world today
Help change it, don't just document it. Okay?

She said she'd give me pleasure
she said her charms were life's greatest treasure
I got a different feeling
almost indescribable
a high like a kite, but energetic and kinetic
it was strange to experience both to remember and forget
what she brought to the table and did to my head
It wasn't psychedelic, but it wasn't reality based
I know I'm starting to sound like a head case
But Molly gave me a new lease
After I learned to fight a disease

Mom I know it's your birthday soon,
And because of that you'll be over the moon,
but I'd be remissed if before your day
I didn't tell you I love you more and more each day
And though you bother me sometimes to no end
you've helped me heal when I thought I wouldn't mend
When I was sick you got every last drop of medicine
When I skinned my knee or stubbed my toe
you were there for my little crying self, and I want the whole world to know
that even when we argue we always get it right in the end
your not only my mom, but my best friend,
but this is getting repetitive so I'll end it in this space
though many have come and gone, no one could ever take your place.

happy(early) birthday Mom!
I love you!

I've been aching for some action
a lot not just a fraction
my ****** desires are all pent up
I try to ignore it but they won't let up

I wanna watch you strip your clothes off
or maybe wear some lingerie
Maybe take a long silk robe off
whatever you want to wear today

I've been craving your sweet body
your curves so angelic and voluptuous
God how I want to devour your sweet sweet hole
it must taste so scrumptious

It's been driving me crazy
the thought of you beside me in bed
Me right on top of you
thrusting until I'm spent

Me pounding on your lady parts
like they're late on the tent
Bending you over and taking you from behind
your *****, so soft and wet

You laying me beside the fireplace
wearing that long silk robe again
you bouncing on me until you release
just keep going, until you can no longer stand

Oh how I've been aching
to let these desires play out
like I said it's been driving me crazy
it's like I'm living in a virginity induced drought

The apostles say that the love of money
Is the root of all evil
And the wit George Bernard Shaw said that the lack of money  is the root of all evil
I agree with both philosophies, but I won't put any money on it.
Well if money is evil, at this point it may seem to be a necessary one.
But money changes us it seems
Whether we aim to aspire above or live beyond our means.

But I can't Speak much on money, but I can tell you this
No matter how much money you have happiness comes from love and time spent with loved ones not being materialistic

Anybody else got that one person or song
You could go without it all day long
You could be angrier than a dog with rabies
Or someone who got robbed daily

Why is it that when that person or song Hppens to be around or on that all of a days Aonizing moments seem to just slip on by
To another place or another time in rhyme

It's like all those bad vibes fall apart when Something like that touches the heart
This is an odd little occurrence but im sure it's a normal occurrence Helping me decompress and acquiesce too I guess that mood changer is all we need Sometimes


(hint, pay attention to the capital letters)

Mother Rose,
What can i say that hasn't already been said
i guess i'll go with what just popped into my head
you had a smile that could light up the darkest of rooms
a tender sweetness that was palpable in the air, like the dust raised by a broom.
An enthusiasm for life and spirituality that most could never hope to acheive.
Even as simply the church guitarist, it was amazing to me
How people automatically felt as if they were at home around you
it was astounding what lot's of love can do within and without you.

I know you're in a much better place
the pain is permanently gone, all the better for all our sakes.
Still, It's good to know that you're up there with our Lord.
Say Hi to some family members we've all lost, we'd be happy if you could.
And some days when life turns sour,
all of us wish that heaven had visiting hours.
So we could be around that award winning smile
and warm as coffee soul
we're all going to miss you
more than anybody could know

So to close this tribute out, I'll leave here with this biblical gem
From revelation "They will rest in their labor, for their deeds will follow them."

Thank you Mr. Sandman for putting my heart to sleep
You didn't **** me but my affectionate nature you buried deep
I found myself numb,
unfeeling about anyone
I still had respect
but couldn't bring myself to drop my guard
I felt like I always had to protect my neck

I knew I couldn't live like that forever
I felt as unloved as a bad Christmas sweater
I tried my best to shake it all off
tried to become cold and hard, but I needed someone with whom I could be soft

Thank you fate for sending to me a friend
a collaboration partner who would become much more in the end
She's mine now and I couldn't be happier
now she's just amazing, even when I couldn't be crappier

The men behind the mask,
that Is my face
have required that I give everyone here
a small update
see not everything I write
Is a result of my own imagination
sometimes I just use the people residing up here
For some measure of inspiration,
NA is me normally and naturally,
it's no longer a character or a concept
but just me on reality.
now I've got to let him out of His Cage.

ALRIGHT JIM YOU CAN COME OUT TO PLAY

Hello I'm Jim I'm sure we haven't met I often use hip-hop to tell of our struggles and Regrets I expect that you'll guess that I was behind the freestyles that were posted here once upon a time but then that's how I rhyme internal and external my microphone skills are ****** like the infernal souls of the restless and the wicked I'll spit ballistics abd the evidence will support that you risked it by battling with me
Next up?
I believe that's me..
OrionThaReject light up the Mic for the symphony

OrionThaReject is my name
being seriously depressed is my game,
I'm usually the sad writings
that pop up on this page
along with loneliness, depression,
and occupational rage
I'm engaged to my tears as they were more faithful than most
so if you like darkness, I hope to me you'll Play host

Well there you have it dear reader
you've met my constructs that are about impossible to destroy without holy water and Ether
anyway, reading my work you should be able to tell who's who
Because the inside of my brain is more messed up than the San Diego zoo

I'd write something as beautiful as you are
But I don't think I could ever find the words
So, I'll use what I do know to flow this out
Maybe, just maybe muse in a clever verse

Something unique, like you doesn't come around too often
And if you're lucky enough to have that, then cherish it because your hard, beating heart will soften

The bitter cynicism will slowly, but oh so surely begin to rot away
The plants of doubt and insecurity that have taken root in the soul will wither and die today

The mind will no longer be cloudy, and the road that was blocked will finally be clear

Or at least it would.... if you were here

Girl, you're my muse
if my creativity was dynamite
then you're the match that lit the fuse
I know I'm not perfect but I'll always try so I won't lose
this perfect entity that looks so heavenly
Girl it's so obvious we're meant to be
essentially what I'm saying is I've lost my heart to you
I've been tricked by cupid before but now I know it's true
it's like my heart is the zoo and you're the animals within
like your my Sherlock Holmes, and I'm your Watson

you got me going crazier than the joker and Harley Quinn
but don't take this lightly, it's like you destroyed all the cold walls I built up within

Would you mind if I related a story to you
about how my headphones picked me up when I was Ohhhhhhhhhh so blue?
When I cried like a baby
until I. could block out the world and listen to my first love daily?

Well peep the scene I had just turned 13
and I was in middle school
away from my friends and family
it took a lot to resist doing something rash and being tossed out on my a$$.

Anyway for the first time in my life,
the prime time of my life at that
I was alone, my only friends right then being the clothes on my back
and the headphones I had put into my backpack

Well my MP3 at the time was on shuffle,
after I got out that day and avoided a scuffle
I put my earbuds in promptly and what did I hear?
RHCP under the bridge, a song I still hold dear
"Sometimes I feel like my only friend"
was a lyric that described exactly the situation I was in.

I was being pushed right then to end my life and become food for the crow or raven
but that song saved my life
and even after all the tears I cried that night
I got up. stronger. ready to carry on life's grand fight.

Girl I'm telling you the truth
Music really does sound better with you
now I know it sounds corny
but you're the only person that doesn't bore me
you've gotten me to take my music out instead of plugging myself in
you've gotten me going crazy outside and within
is it wrong to think about you so much it's a sin?
it's crazy how we get about each other
I know it sounds crazy but we're closer than even the most obsessed lovers
so once again I tell you because I know is true
Music Sounds so much better with you.

okay let's get to the point
my brains become a highway for every even and odd point
from the meaning of life to my favorite cheese
it's a tornado of mozzarella and thoughts I can't hope to silence, without a psychology degree

It's weird when all thought cylinders fire up in the dead of night no matter how hard you try you can't find peace without knocking out your own lights

Why can't my neurons shut up so I can fall asleep
My brain is moving faster than doogie howser with his degree, Help me please!

I don't garden much
But
I do have a flower
Red with paisley highlights
A green stem, sharp and bright.
And leaves pretty as the summers day.

And sometimes a storm comes,
And im hapoy to go back outside
And put that *** with the whole in the bottom
To give it protection, because it will need that in this weird life...

Okay baby boomers we need to have a discussion
First of all the cold war is over, no need to fear the Russians
Second off we're in completely different times
You can't judge us by what you went through, as I'll attempt to put through these lines.

Let's start with dating, the worst you had to fear then was getting rejected
Now we have to worry about getting humiliated for giving somebody attention

Now on to politics, just because you don't agree with someone doesn't mean what you disagree with is of the devil you might win some but to most you lost one, in fact more than one election I'm sure
People are sick of being in the fifties, we've had enough denial to endure.

On to our lifestyles, you may have had the most babies but we allowed the most love,
The last time I checked  that was the greatest commandment from up above

Speaking of religion, I'm Christian, but I won't go Out of my way to give someone crap for being lesbian, Bi, Trans or gay.
What will you look like, being an judgemental ******* on judgement day

I was in trouble
And oh boy did I know it
I came home drunk last night
the hangover showed it

As I crawled out of bed, headache splitting my eyes
I saw my wife with that "I love you but I'm going to **** you" vibe,
but she held it in and on her face a look of concern was her guise

I hurled for about an hour
then my stomach settled down
I looked for my wife
but she was nowhere to be found
I drank some water, and soon after hit the floor
before I slipped into unconsciousness
I saw my wife come through the door

I woke up, and took in my surroundings
I was in a dark , medium sized room
caged in, and the floor was concrete..
And in walked my wife, with a crop and a corset on that hourglass body, she looked ready for a pounding

I wondered.. what the hell was going on?
how did she know I wanted to try this...
when did I let it on?
She walked into the room, I was tied to the bed,
but before whacking me, she surveyed me instead
She walked slowly around me
My eyes drinking in her features,
She whacked me in my chest and said
Look here boy, I'm going to tease you

She slid the corset down, showing one ****** off,
I was now hard where I once was soft
She licked herself slowly
Me getting aroused all the more
I knew my wife was the experimental type
but even she didn't know what was in store

She slid those ******* down
My God she was so wet
She slid her finger inside and said
"Nope, you can't have this yet"
I shook with anticipation. Pleading with her through my eyes
She remained adamant and continued weaving an arousing web, all truth here, I can't tell any lies.

She slid my pants off my legs
And threw them to the floor
She got on top of me and yelled
today you're my personal manwhore!
with that I found myself inside,
bouncing on my cxck
I had never seen her this aggressive
it came off as quite a shock

After an hour and hundreds of welts later
it Appeared she was done with me
that's when she layed next to me and whispered

"Happy Anniversary"!

It's looking as though my head is a prankster
You know
Because I'll think one thing, and unintentionally say another
Sort of like faking being asleep by hiding underneath covers
It's not clever or original and it's driving me crazy
I'll not feel pain but the over analysis from my brain makes the space behind my eyes hazy
Lately I've been having this same **** dream
I keep waking up in a straitjacket and I'm close to bursting at the seams
But then I hear a voice, and I'm not sure who it is
It calms me back down, and the madness subsides and I begin to return to my wits
But then the voice leaves and I'm running down the hall, door to door and corner to corner.
It's ****** up when your mind is playing tricks on you

My lyrics are malicious drive you ballistic like holistic priest thinking something vicious My flow is viscous moving down the beat like a runny nose the flows sick call a doctor I'll examine your lines like a proctor or a projector I'm the protector of the legit hip-hop style I profile like Ric Flair no care while you stare at this skinny black kid with the name brand flows I eat generic emcees for breakfast while my pen explodes is it so or no let it go like frozen ice cold like frozone while I Make the Mic moan and bust on stage with my lyrical *** while on the decks the wax spins sealing your doom like Indiana Jones in the temple for you theirs no room

When we're tired we sleep
And when we sleep we dream
And lately i keep seeing this dog
Can someone tell me what it means?
He's a little Akita hound
Pointed ears and scrunchy nose
I named him Tanuki
Because he looks like an undersized fox
With no weasels to hold
He's little, tiny and loyal
But only exsists in my head
He loves snuggling by me, apparently
He's loves nodding his head

So why do i keep seeing this adorable dog
As i hover over the cliff of sleep?
So can someone please tell me,
What do my dreams mean?

Every rainstorm is a Symphony
really I'll name all of the parts
obviously the thunder is the percussion section
keeping rhythm at sporadic times
the raindrops on the streets and rooftops are hammering out the bass and melody lines
the howling wind is the vocalists all itching to amaze the crowd

The animals footsteps are applause scattered in awe at this odd beautiful composition
put together and arranged by nature
and performed by the stormy orchestra
That's why, every storm, at least to me
is one of nature's symphonies

The chain broke and the pendant landed with a sickeningly soft creak on those hardwood floors I looked Down in shock, not knowing what else gravity had in store,
I loved that old necklace, heck I even remember when I got it, it's elder brother my old rose sword necklace had melted so I went out with some friends and bought it's replacement. A Dagger with two dragons around a red gem fit my aesthetic perfectly like a speech copied verbatim

Anyway I picked it back up and replaced the pendant back on the chain and as this weighs back on my brain I remember why I got necklaces from my travels to wear memories close to me, right above the heart
And hopefully no one will tear me and those same memories apart

Ever have a browser open
With many different tabs?
Its a slippery *****
From one tab needed,
To about 20 for no reason
Some only open for a second
Taking up more bandwidth than the
Christmas season
It's like when it slows down, your computer
Is committing the high act of treason
Bleeding onto the overstimulated neurons
That occupy your mind with things so frivolous
And then you see..

The holes in your thoughts and logic creeping and creaking, closer to falling apart
Like listening to someone with a perpetually broken heart
Speak about love purer than the whitest dove
And how they'll never fall apart...

That's what my brain is like
Ive long since given up the fight...

Never give me money
I won't ever spend it right
Never give me money
I'm an idiot who's wallet never is wrapped tight

Never give me money
Because I have to make that frivolous purchase
Never give me money, because no matter how much I have I'll still feel worthless

Never give me money,
Because I'll end up with unpayable debt
Never give me money
Because sadness sprouted and took root in my head

Never give me money, I can't say this enough
Never give me money, even when times hey rough

I know it seems like my life's not rough
But why is it I'm never good enough
Why can I bust my **** and nobody is proud
I can write all day, but I can't erase this cloud

When I learn one song, I have to know three others
When I'm down and drained mentally I can't recover

So I place on a brave face and try to remain tough
A nagging doubt remains. "You aren't good enough!"
No matter what vice I avoid, or pain that subsides
I want nothing more some days than to lay down and cry

Even though my life hasn't been too rough
It always seems, I'm not good enough

This year I resolve to not curse my heart or curse at my feelings because owning up to that begins my healing

I resolve to live and love as hard as I can and always cross those lines drawn in the sand

I hereby say ******* to any haters and people who never had my back because I never gave you reason to attack

I also swear to never compare myself to another unless they're my brother I can't follow anymore I'm going to lead

I also resolve to let down my pain forged armor and fight on in heart and in spirit.
I'm through paying a victim. I'm going on through with this.

Hmm... I guess I'm making more changes than I thought I'd do at all
I guess I'll call this a new years overhaul

So I'm being watchman, for my grandma tonight, she's going in for surgery
You know this hospital has changed, better than i thought it'd be

This mattress is about as sleeponable as a cracked open fence
I can't stay in because it's out of shape my spine is bent

Ive spent a pretty penny on snacks, and now I'm wishing i could find some relief for my back
But it's not about me tonight, it's about my grandma in her hour of need, we as her seed must attempt to pay her back

For all the things she did for us, sometimes big sometimes small
Hell if it wasn't for grandma, i wouldnt be here at all.
For bringing me my mother, and then taking up a burden of a kid,
When mom had to work late when i was sick, you always stepped up to the plate, i dont know how you did it but you did.

So thank you for everything Grandma, for we should all aspire to be half of the person you are...

It's like when I finally lay down
in my nice warm bed
ready to call it an evening
and spend the next eight hours hallucinating
I keep imagining you beside me warm and happy
maybe that will make some of my days less ******
I wish so sincerely that I could hold you so dearly
Kiss your cheeks and tell you I love you as you awake
cuddle you so closely and hold you tight
because your a treasure I don't want anybody to take

(if you caught the reference in the title you get bonus points)

Well it's dark outside,
I'm lying on bed
those thoughts of you
crawl back into my head
laid together in a passionate embrace
a look of lust and desire plastered on your face
the bed creaking, the neighbors hearing more... and more
I never would've guessed how naughty you are, you took me by surprise on the floor
now we're in bed, biting, thrusting for all we're worth
making love until the sun arises to awaken the earth
oh how lovely this would be
oh wait I'm alone.... back to the website for me!

Hello, I'm nobody
I wish I could become someone
but I guess that won't happen
my minds exploded
damaged or dead making repair
Almost impossible

Again, like I said I'm nobody
so I guess no one will notice
If I take  myself away.
Not ending myself but shutting down
never Again to know the light of day

I said before I wish I was someone
people cared about
But I said before, I'm nobody
and that no one will ever doubt

"What is a man?!
A miserable Pile of Secrets!" he shoutes
then he sprung his attack
with the holy whip of my ancestors in my hand
I intended to make it his epitaph.
we battled for hours on end,
using holy water and dodging fireballs that would've meant my doom
when I had him beaten, he transformed into a grotesque demon
which also distorted the room
I didn't know which I was battling, my own head or Count Vlad Tepes Dracul
Anyway, after one final strike, The Undead terror had finally been slain
I hoped and prayed that no-one would ever speak his name

Why can't I ever
Corral my thoughts and keep them together
It's like my head is always under the weather
I know reader I sound like a broken record

But

If you can place yourself in the position
That fate decided to place me in
When my head moves quicker than my mouth
And sometimes slower than a dead fish in a drought

There's never an in between
Its either up or down to the Nth of extremes
I try to keep my composure but I always end up making a scene


That's what happens when there's no in-between

Hello, I'm noir
Nero must've left the door open
And he's not here right now,
Well, why don't I show you what happens
when I'm allowed to take his paper and write things down
It's simple, when he's sad WHO DOES HE TURN TO?!
but anyway, you may be wondering what the hell is on his mind?
I'll tell you, rejection.
He's been through it so much he's almost learned to expect it.
From the most beautiful of models to the ugliest of wenches.
Most people can take a loss quietly but then he can't find what's left of his confidence. 
He gave up trying for awhile to try to figure himself out, stay away from all that dating stuff because his heart had been through a rout.

But after he found it again it was dashed just that quickly, like a flickering flame
And thus he took all of it to heart, he felt it was on himself placed was the blame


"Noir? Why are you writing again?"
"I was telling the people why you won't even find it in yourself to get tinder to attempt to get a girlfriend?!"
"I TRIED THAT ONCE AND I LOST FAITH IN IT FASTER THAN A BITTER ATHEIST!"
"GOD YOU'RE INCESSANTLY STUBBORN! WHY CAN'T YOU GIVE YOURSELF ANY TYPE OF CREDIT?!"
"Because, my dear figment, I tried doing that and even then life through a wrench in. "

You can tell a lot about someone
By the music they listen to
I haven't listened to a love song in quite a bit
Of time.
Not because I don't like them, I like to think I'm not that cynical
But
I guess taking some punches to the gut from love made me rethink my playlists
Constantly hitting skip
Until just now
Cause it's when you're down that you truly understand lyrics

The song? "Try a little tenderness."

Can anyone tell me
Where I'm supposed to be going?
Even the humble plants on the ground
Grow without knowing
I've enjoyed this journey, ups and downs and all
And I still don't know how to fight through life's fog
And the more I try to find answers the deeper I go into the smog
Can you tell me where I'm supposed to be going and what I need to be doing? Because I'm tired of being a nomad with no cause

Nomadic
enigmatic
filled with emotional static
wandering away from the cold of the day
wandering away from the heart per se

Roaming away from my feelings
being frightened by what they can mean
isn't a pleasant sensation
it's the ultimate in fear
of your own feelings
**** I know
I'm in need of some kind of healing

I read once that none can be as cruel as an unthinking youth
and sad or to kinda be expected that's true
as we know, somewhat to much chagrin
young children will be brutally honest no matter what setting they're in.

Now, bullying is an American epidemic
so why would a parent add fuel to a fire that's already spreading?
why humiliate your offspring to get a point across
why take the heart of a child and harden what's malleable and soft?
I get it, when your child does wrong you have to correct
that's all well and good, but where's the limit set?

Like I stated earlier none can be as cruel as an unthinking youth,
so parents I ask, would you like that done to you?
Would you be okay with someone leaking every stupid decision you made on a worldwide platform?
Would you grin and bear it as more and more people treat you with unbridled and cruel scorn?
taunting remarks and biting stings that remind us of a simple truth
None can be as cruel as an unthinking youth