"resurfaced" poems
What if love became so overwhelming, such an inextinguishable force that its true purpose betrayed itself completely?
To the point that even the utterance of those three powerful words, that at a different junction had held such promise, now left a distinct taste of uncertainty on the lips and a ringing of insanity in the ear drum. What else does one say when the most pure form of expression and commitment echo with distain and regret?
Even as I slide into introspection, diving deep to the point of no return, there seems to be no logical path, no penance for the monster I have created. Through my own autonomous actions and neglect I have reached this dark place. Perhaps I indulged beyond a point where thoughts and actions have boundaries. A broken compass , spinning without meaning. All indicators in tact, every cog and point in place, magnetism lost to exaggerated memories, fears and regrets.
Self delusion is a drink that is best served with company. With companionship the mind tends to believe its own meddling. Delusions are mistaken for truth and biased opinions blur with reality.
All roads lead to pain. Every so often a spark jumps to the surface of my consciousness. A pin ***** exclaiming hope. It’s a glitch of my own creation. The belief in happy endings and love prevailing. That love is more powerful than any disappointment, mistake or breech in trust. My reality had been resurfaced and augmented by the media. Love stories are just that. Stories. A wave of manufactured hope, washing over the beach of the human psyche. Every grain of sand is washed back to the sea just as it has arrived.
Happiness, a flame burning on a tiny wick. Enjoy the heat while it lasts for it is going to be a cold winter. And the power is out.
Oct 31, 2012
Oct 31, 2012 at 3:19 PM UTC
The second i snap out of my dream and back into the realism of it all, im hoping second by second that your actually here beside me and that i wasn't just dreaming out loud. My body and mind, coming back to the surface of it all, my breathing pick's up and my sense of feel and smell has resurfaced. I smell the sweet and light smell of your hair but im not sure if it's just the after math of my dream. starring at this wall, im afraid to roll over, because if i roll over and your not there i don't know how well i'm going to do or if ill even continue with my day. If I can continue this dream of you, i'll sleep forever, i'll never open my eyes again. I brace myself, cause it's time for me to roll over. Tightening my muscles, stretching my skin, tired bone's cracking, hair moving in all direction's, clothes moving out of place and indenting the bed. I squeeze my eye's tight, causing my pupil's to shrink, hoping that when i open these door's and let my pupil's increase to normal size, there your perfectly shaped body will be. I imagine it before i dare to reveal the truth. The blanket's fall into place where your curves indent, your hair in a wave like the pattern flowing wave's in the ocean, your arm being tucked just under your chin where it meet's your other arm and after a few seconds i can't bare the taunt my imagination is dangling in my face, so i open my eyes and there you are. Exactly how I imagined it. I take a moment for all this to register, as if i had just won the lottery. In that moment i find myself wrapping my arm's around you and your finger's sliding up my arm and into my hand to lock with mine. This is truely the meaning of "Goodmorning", so goodmorning, babe.
Jun 9, 2011
Jun 9, 2011 at 7:17 AM UTC
Wind blows its way right through my senses
All my thoughts have but slowly disappeared
One more large smoky glass of cheap whisky
One more sad lonely night that you're not here.
Loneliness set in as the door quickly closed
Using the back door now and keeping that one shut
It will stay like that until ever you come back
But I've a notion now that it will stay put.
Old sore wounds that somehow resurfaced
Caused a bitter rift long forgotten to return
And the memories and the tears from the last time
Hit the heart, exploded and then burned.
So I sit trying to write and supping whisky
As I wait to hear your key in the front door
I hope with all my heart that you'll forgive me
I can't bear to be alone here any more.
The wind is getting stronger now and I thought I heard the latch
But it was just some fighting creatures out in the dark
So I'll wait as I do each night with my whisky and my pen
Sitting here and waking up with the sound of the lark.
©Joe Wilson - Whisky and my pen 2014
Sep 26, 2014
Sep 26, 2014 at 12:32 PM UTC
#
You have brought back these feelings
Resurfaced those fears
Of the fire inside
that had so many tears
A weak flame that was dying
Alive once again
Has now muddied the line
between lover and friend
That's how it goes for me
I don't know about you
The words passing might be
in that moment were true
They kept traveling on
Possibly a comet
As my feelings grow strong
Expectations not met
Once again feel a fool
Even though it's not true
And my heart gave to you
Time again I will do
But this time not the same
It's because you weren't here
Could not reach out and touch
So our bodies weren't shared
Just the words that were said
And the sound of your voice
Resurrect from the dead
Could not stop; Had no choice
Seems like that's how it is
In your lasso I'm snared
All it takes is one tug
And again I will care
Pilot light to a stove
A slight twist and it strikes
You've invaded my heart
Bursting flame will ignite
But if carelessly handled
It's me who gets burned
Walked all over and trampled
Same dolt who won't learn
I have built up the walls
But we're both trapped inside
The tight space is so small
There's nowhere I can hide
Face-to-face with you now
It begins and it ends
I'll get through it somehow
Are we lovers or friends?
#
Dec 3, 2018
Dec 3, 2018 at 8:56 PM UTC
"Sorgente' " (Spring Waters)
I never knew tears could be so rough
Scratching my chest as if trying
To climb in, next to my heart.
Perhaps they would be more comfortable together,
able to fathom what my mind won’t.
I see the pain clawing on his face-
Engraved
like the tombstone we picked out for him
a couple of days ago.
All it was missing was a date…
Date the waters, watch how time will freeze them over.
Frozen in time, their memory awaits our remembrance.
It was only yesterday that we took a traditional dive
In the glistening, silkened
Waters-kissed the base
of that cold, slippery precipice. But we were gazelles that
early spring. The Impalelies and Witbietou flowers
Met rowdy cheeks and our seasoned grace.
We were Eagles, soaring to gather our prey.
Plop! To the crust of the water’s earth,
we dived uncharacteristically.
Characteristically- I, resurfaced.
You touched the Sun and the Moon that morning.
You called on God and His Son, Jesus Christ.
You said a prayer to Buddha and Indian goddess Indrani.
You kissed the fragrant air of the Jacaranda tree,
and consumed the fate of the Great Julius Caesar.
Makeda and Zulu King Catewayo,
cried in Imhotep’s arms that morning,
Tears beat upon the Djembe drum
Performing Indonesian Gamelan
We chanted the words- spero
Here I sit,
there, next to you
wondering when our eyes will meet
again.
Wondering how long you will play this game
of “who can hold their breath the longest.”
You are winning…I am crying.
My face is stained with your name,
your absent spirit, envelopes this hospital room
but your soul-
your soul will run, jump into the air,
And up there,
This time-
I will catch you.
May 19, 2010
May 19, 2010 at 10:20 PM UTC
I try to stop and wonder why
Am I numb now?
Tears start to fall
Never wanting to stop
Just a minute ago
I was laughing
Now I’m depressed
Suicidal thoughts arise
How can I've been happy?
Then so upset in a blink of an eye
I remember their faces
And I feel nothing for them
Everything’s a distant memory
My own nightmares taking over
I try to find something joyful
All I found was even more terror
How can I tell the people who love
That when night comes
I’m no longer myself
Just like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
I’m a monster that does not feel
Alone and cold, immune to everything
What happened to me?
I want it to stop
But whenever I try to stop
Someone else barges in
I don’t know who it is
But they’re taking over
I try to control myself
Hoping to win the battle in my head
Whether I win or lose
I’m no longer the same
I've changed but not for the better
All the things I've pushed away
Have resurfaced and formed
Now it has personified into my nightmares
Gladly, it only happens at night
But it talks to me during the day
I push back the negativity
Or else it’ll swallow me whole
Who knew it would be like this
I didn't, but that’s what I get
I can never be truly happy
I’ve accepted this much
I’ll face the world with my burdens
Give everyone a smile
I’ll lie my way to my death
Knowing that no one knows the monster inside.
Apr 19, 2013
Apr 19, 2013 at 8:12 AM UTC
On the way back all these thoughts poured,
Leaving me more opaque than when I left.
All the fears resurfaced with their horns and pitchforks...
No, I didn't tread through this tedious hell just to fail.
And then a voice said:
"Facing your demons, and the ones you thought you left behind, never was easy. You get scared and overwhelmed, but that's why you pray. "
...and that's why suddenly, we could all move again.
Oct 2, 2012
Oct 2, 2012 at 11:26 AM UTC
the earth shakes beneath tectonic plates
a misery of mistakes weaved from the same rope that will hang the united states
as empires fall we withdraw
compassion for killjoy a complete and utter moral cleanse
dictators or dollars it doesn't make a difference
retrograde deviants persuing misanthropic leaniance
together as one bleeding out of every orface
the love of god flickers as the sign for hope is resurfaced
Feb 15, 2013
Feb 15, 2013 at 5:11 PM UTC
in my spotless mind,
i had a blue dream.
deep in limbo.
somewhere in the ocean..
wading.
with my lover.
do you remember?
no?
well, it's cool.
with promises of eternal sunshine,
we wade a little deeper.
he holds me close & whispers in my ear,
**"you're so brave."**
we wade further until we are completely submerged.
floating deeper & deeper,
i felt the pressure and grimaced.
he mouths to me,
*"why aren't you smiling?"*
i grasped his hand firmly and pulled him toward me.
in his arms, we kicked until we resurfaced.
he smiled at me and I smiled back.
we kissed; he tasted salty.
we swam to shore.
we sat on the beach in a tight embrace.
he kisses my hair and says,
**"I live for your love, die for your love."**
I whispered,
"and I do you."
I look up at him.
"pretty bird", he breathes.
**and in that moment, I knew that I was souled out for him.**
{r.r.r.w}
Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 8:17 PM UTC
Skin. Teeth.
Pressure. Exerted.
Tense. Held.
Push. Downward. Sunken. Underneath.
Retracted. Released. Resurfaced. Regained
May 16, 2022
May 16, 2022 at 3:34 PM UTC
Imma white strand
underneath that wide band
on your round land
under the heap among profound men
just someone unique, identified from a mile back
*** mild 'attack
seeing me took a step back
thinking me of a **** wack
who isn't like em
I've been cut
I've been dyed
I've died
yet resurfaced just like a lie
screaming at your face dare ******* deny.
Oct 23, 2023
Oct 23, 2023 at 12:15 AM UTC
I used to idolize you
And I could never believe
You would deliberately hurt me
You didn't mean it
It wasn’t your fault
A million excuses
Exchanged for a million bruises
That lined my skin
In semi-permanent remembrance
of you
Five years later
I can still see those black and blue marks
That once blotted my skin
But now I am awake
And no longer oblivious
To your lies
5 years of slumber
1,825 days
Or 43,800 hours
And even 2,628,000 minutes
Of being blind to you
But the mathematics do not matter
Because you do not measure
Pain the same way
You measure time
Finally speaking, 5 years later
After being silenced by my own mind
Trapped by the fear that no one
Would understand
Let alone care
5 years of being scared and afraid
Like an animal
Who was hit too many times
Only because I was too ignorant
To run from what I thought
Was love
And now it has been three days
Since his return
Old wounds have resurfaced
5 years worth of scars
Of bruises
Of horrible, horrible memories
All oppressed by my notion
Of what love really was
I can feel my skin become tender
From where you used to abuse
Your power
But the difference now
Is that I am strong
I am not measly
Nor weak
And I will never cower
Below your shadow again
5 years of recovery
And torture and pain
But now I can live
The rest of my life
An eternity with an infinite
Amount of possibilities
Because I am not scared
Not anymore
Because after 5 years of being weak
I arise from my hibernation
And come out courageous
May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 9:29 PM UTC
And my twin flame wrote;
"So, it's either too soon
or too late for love?"
Later realizing
who had sent that poem
I gave my true conscious reply
But it was too late
I missed my mark in poem
and sadly before
without meaning to do so.
An ancient script on stage
at the Hilton resurfaced from
that glorious Sunday.
Mother's Day missing the mark,
fame and great fortune!
I so adored you beloved.
You changed my world
Yes everything had meaning!
"True love is timeless
without beginning or end"
PRECIOUS LOVE
It's never too soon, nor too late.
In spirit in the beginning
and from that Hilton labby
Glued together twin flame lover
I wished with you to be.
My darling!
Timeless is true love.
~~~~~
By: karijinbba
All rights Reserved-74-95.
Apr 24, 2021
Apr 24, 2021 at 7:47 PM UTC
they wanted to be high school
sweethearts again
they wanted
to reignite that past flame
a chance did arise for the two
they seized the opportunity
to link up
they've done all in their power
to rerun their high school days
the ember of love
was ever in the background
just waiting for the appropriate time
back in 1977 they left Grafton High School
to pursue careers
and as a consequence
they lost touch
but a fellow pupil
was organizing a class reunion
she invited them
to the get together
once they locked eyes at this occasion
those old feelings
resurfaced
their love was rekindled
as it was
in those high school days
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 7:30 PM UTC
I'll be your hades
And you'll be my persephone
I'll love you unconditionally
In a world full of Zeus like mentality.
I Hades left my underworld domain
I rose to the surface after being restrained
And Persephone there in a field of flowers
So lovely was she I watched for hours
Her beauty there was none to compare
I hid as she picked flowers with care
I had to have her then I could not wait
Told my brother Zeus my love was great
We hatched a plan to trap my new love
Opened the earth beneath she fell from above
I rose in my chariot took her into my arms
She frightened told her I would not harm
I took her home with me underground
My horse’s hooves did fly and pound
I gave her jewels and pricely precious stones
Taking her hand begged to share my throne
I wooed her with words from my heart
But her being such a rare work of art
How could she love such a beast as me
Banished from above by the gods decree
Somehow her heart softened toward myself
I gained her love kept it high on a shelf
Married I made love to that alabaster skin
I took her sweet body from way within.
Her lips I did taste as much as I dared
She kissed me back she had come to care
But as happy as I tried to make her be
Her sadness resurfaced she longed to be free
I kept her underground in my palace dome
All the while saddened she wanted to go home
Demeter my sister did beg and cry
Her daughter she wept to see by and by
It broke my heart to see my lady love
Wanting so much to visit above
So I hatched a plan with Zeus my brother
I played a trick so she could love no other
I gave her a ripe pomegranate to eat
A deal I made and did so complete
I would allow her to visit the earthly realm
Even as it broke my heart I fed her whelm
But she could only stay for months of spring
In winter she would come back to her king.
Feb 22, 2020
Feb 22, 2020 at 10:42 PM UTC
A shadow of night
Hope festering among stars
My heart clutched in
The palms of my hand
As thoughts wield into luminous scars
A lost affection resurfaced by light
A habit, that is
Whispered as time etches Her might
And through the weight of Her fists
Need not to dwell for what is missed
So I collected the remnants of my heart
And began to ask from my very vain soul
What yet that is not the light?
I turned the coals from my eyes into rubies
And my heart opened to the entire world
Mar 30, 2015
Mar 30, 2015 at 5:39 PM UTC
Hovering along the river.
A sacred water nourished by water lilies.
The sun kissing each petal evaporating the translucent water drops.
Visiting each lotus, wisdom lies in this pond.
Admiring the serenity and beauty each flower illustrates.
Gaze altered by darkness below.
Discovering the river’s bottom.
The complexity of each flower hides beneath the surface.
Countless lilies firmly rooted in dampened mud.
These magnificent flowers stem from malevolence.
Exploration of each lotus consumed by shadows.
These abused souls have endured untold suffering.
Resurfaced from unbearable knowledge.
Appreciating the resilience of this water garden.
The buds that persisted despite horrific surroundings.
Examining this pond of loti, praising their bloom.
A water of survivors.
Radiance of inspiration.
© Jl 2015
Jan 22, 2016
Jan 22, 2016 at 7:13 PM UTC
For what we use as distractions
Are nothing more than just that
They won't stop a heart's contractions
Or aches when memories of past
Are resurfaced
Instead, they merely graze
The mental wound
Like a pack of hounds
Tearing you to pieces
And your temporary happiness ceases
Jun 17, 2015
Jun 17, 2015 at 4:08 AM UTC
I can't remember when you left,
It seems you were always leaving,
into the night, behind feathered trees,
and when the rain hit you,
you pretended you didn't feel anything
"I don't want to talk about my dad," you'd say
That unholy narcissist left bruises on you,
that you hid from us all
I wish you'd said your mother was a villain ,
who tried to send you to heaven,
but only succeeded in making you bleed;
a memory that resurfaced,
as the devil's stigmata,
on your wrists
You're the girl in a coma,
and have been since I met you,
who fell in love with her doctor,
the day she almost died
Her am I wondering,
are you alive?
Or are you a ghost,
haunting Christ Church,
continuing to do the only thing
that made you happy
I'm sorry you're gone,
your phone ringing out,
your profile a tombstone
I wish I could go,
go to your home
and ring your doorbell
without the fear of being told,
The girl in a coma has left,
not behind the trees,
into the dark,
but to the place her mother tried to send her,
not long after she took her first breath
Dec 4, 2014
Dec 4, 2014 at 4:00 PM UTC
Old mottos resurfaced in a strange land
Ogling blindly eyeballs
all over the horizontal landscapes
Laying with my head
upside dangling from the bed
Drunk wobbling it up now
to find balanced faces like demi-demon ghosts white haunting
panting voices and legs for days
dwindling each other down with nail file twine
How long does it take to cut open your arm with an unlit candle?
Rub at it turning the wax skin and burn
I have your half blood head fang
hanging over my bed now
It bleeds on me still
Drips in my mouth while I rest
It tastes okay
I guess
Sep 22, 2012
Sep 22, 2012 at 4:16 AM UTC
but now i can eat kraft dinner late on a sunday afternoon with my window open and feel the sunlight now i can turn off my phone without panicking and now now I can breathe without fear coating my lungs and my eyes stop resting on sharp objects and now it's been something like two years and something has changed and the things that used to make me feel something like passion have resurfaced and i realize they never went away i just had forgotten how to feel them and god if i've learned anything at all it's that nothing is ever over and right at the moment where you feel like the world's ****** good and proper and there's no getting off your back is the moment when you realize that you are not made of glass you are not fragile and broken you are ******* marble and concrete you are iron that you have built yourself into and god i wish i could say that's it but you will have to fight you will get your hands ***** as you tear out the parts you need to leave behind but you will plant new roots one day you will look at yourself or someone you love and you will know where you've been and what you have come from and nothing will feel as good as when you realize that you are here
you made it
May 21, 2015
May 21, 2015 at 4:55 PM UTC
I sense those cunning eyes,
hidden beneath a mask of lies.
I shudder at your menacing grin,'
that outwardly covers your sin.
A sin you claim to have forgotten,
has resurfaced and made every memory rotten
O, tell me my merciless friend,
whom does your conscience defend?
You, who were supposedly smart,
does your soul not confront your heart?
How could you wrench out my heart
when our relationship was about to start?
You are like every other bloke,
you've treated my feelings like a joke
Did my thought not cross your mind,
did your better sense turn blind?
What did you fall for? her looks? her charms?
What were you thinking, when you took her in your arms?
Did you not realize you were breaking my trust,
with your momentary lapse of lust?
when you took off your shirt?
Did you realize I would be hurt,
Do you believe in karma? I know I do,
and I'm sure someday it will get you.
You have ripped out my heart, with your claws,
You have chewed my between your jaws,
you have crushed me beneath your paws,
With your act of deceit,
You heartless cheat,
You have won, I've lost, I face defeat.
Aug 31, 2014
Aug 31, 2014 at 12:43 PM UTC
I remember a day,
when the clouds were illuminated,
by a bright pink sky...
everything that seemed important,
just melted away,
and in a stare:
innocence resurfaced,
and was joined by joyous curiosity,
all due to the beauty of
a sky that was pink...
cotton candy over the
dull apartment buildings,
pink lemonade in the sky,
even made smoke stacks pause in awe,
games were stopped,
shovels were dropped,
and collectively we stared,
wide-eyed, smiling brightly,
and all at once,
we reached out to grab a piece,
trying to hold onto its beauty,
but eventually...
black replaced pink,
indifference replaced joy,
acceptance replaced innocence,
and the cotton candy/pink lemonade,
became bitter black licorice,
that not even the man in the moon
could eat.
Jan 31, 2011
Jan 31, 2011 at 7:49 PM UTC
Packetfuls of some morning long gone
Celebrations of some relations long lost
Appraisals of youth long withered
Dying of some laughter long forgotten
Yellowed photographs newly rediscovered.
As if after the hesitation of two decades
They’ve resurfaced out of a rusty old box
Freshly etching old patterns, repainting innocence
A revision of life… what if….what if not….
Some strange spirit of myself smiles back at me
“Is that me?” leading on to “Who am I?”
Existential discomfort set alight
The sleepless questions- twisting and turning
Memories in my head- swimming and swirling
- Vijayalakshmi Harish
16/06/2007
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish
Aug 13, 2012
Aug 13, 2012 at 12:40 AM UTC