"doubted" poems
Two memes diverged in a dank montage,
And sorry I could not watch both
And be one memer, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it memed in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as dank,
And having perhaps the better meme,
Because it was dank and wanted memes;
Though as for that the meming there
Had danked them really about the same,
And both that montage equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden african american.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back to 9gag.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence: ******* kiddies
Two memes diverged in a montage, and I—
I took the one less memed by,
And that has made all the dankness.
Jun 3, 2015
Jun 3, 2015 at 10:50 PM UTC
*Speechless, ignored, could
You even miss me at all
If I fell away?
If I drowned like my
Words that everyone doubted
And learned to neglect?
A silent heartbeat,
With the silence you put to
Everything I say?
I wish a friend would
Like my company, I just
Haven't found one yet-
Jan 22, 2018
Jan 22, 2018 at 11:20 AM UTC
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
20k
It's that moment
when the pieces
of the puzzle
all combine.
And you see a
glorious picture
that you doubted
that you'd find.
And then after
when the pieces
are inspected
each with care.
You see purpose
and see meaning
each too valuable
to spare.
Aug 15, 2019
Aug 15, 2019 at 12:37 AM UTC
She was a prisoner,
Trapped in the shadows of the night,
Caged in the gloom of the world.
She sang songs of heart throbbing emotion,
And played melodies of continuous tragedies.
She wrapped herself in life's desolation
And felt the pull of never ending stress weighing her down.
But she stood under the relentless pressure,
And never wavered.
She heard tunes of everlasting joy and peace,
And never strayed.
She found her way through the darkness,
And never doubted.
A girl once born in clouded adversity,
Now blossomed in ceaseless exultation.
Jan 4, 2016
Jan 4, 2016 at 10:08 PM UTC
Anne crutched her way
over the grass
from the nursing home
to the white seats on the lawn
and sat down
in one of the chairs
and threw her crutches
to the ground beside her
I sat in a chair
next to her
she had on a blue skirt
and white blouse
her one leg stuck out
from the end
of her skirt
the other kids played
on the swings and slide
or walked around
avoiding being
near Anne
I wonder
if the nuns have periods?
She said suddenly
I don't know
I said
might explain
their crabbiness some days
she said
I nodded my head
unsure of the topic
periods of what?
I asked
she looked at me
sternly for a moment
you don't know?
I shook my head
gazing at her
it's ************
in real terms
she said
none the wiser
I looked at her
hair dark
and almost shiny
where she’d
brushed it so much
do you know that?
no not heard of it
I said
she sighed
and looked at me deeply
do your parents tell
you nothing?
not about
************ anyway
I said
my old man told me
about the Plague of London
in 1665
and rats and stuff
**** the Plague of 1665
she said
this is real stuff
it may come handy
one day to know
I doubted it
but said nothing
I looked back
at the nursing home
for rescue
do you know anything
about the female cycle?
She said
my friend's sister's cycle
didn't have a cross bar
I said
remembering Jim's sister
and the bicycle
I sometimes rode
no no Kid
not that kind of cycle
her body cycle
I noticed as she moved
on the chair
her leg stump
became visible
when a female
gets to a certain age
her body gets prepared
to put an egg
in a place in her body
ready to be fertilized
ok?
I saw the stump clearly
it looked like the end
of a plump elbow
Kid do you hear
what I am saying?
Yes
I said
good
now if the egg
doesn't get fertilized
by a certain time
her body gets rid of it
in a cycle
and she bleeds
the whole package out
right?
It didn’t sound too good
but I nodded
what kind of egg?
I asked
what do you mean
what kind of egg?
A ****** human egg
what do you think
a ****** hens' egg?
She sighed deeply
and I wondered where
she bought her one shoe
how old are you Kid?
10 nearly 11 years old
I replied
studying her black shoe
and wondering
what she did
with the other shoe
what's fertilization?
I asked
looking up at her
sitting in the chair
her eyes focused on me
go ask the nuns
they'll know
she said snappily
ok
I said
I will
she reached for her crutches
and said
right Kid
let's go to the beach
out of the eyes
of the *******
and their reach
and so I walked
beside her
out the back gate
and onto the path
that led
to the sand and sea
blue skies
white clouds
seagulls
and Anne and me.
Jul 4, 2014
Jul 4, 2014 at 2:11 AM UTC
I was once a boy who believed in words dipped in magic
Carefully coated with sugar
From a distance, they shimmered
whispered fog in its wake
surgically dipped into your heart at hummingbird speed
these sweet tender words were easy to swallow
however leaves a burning hole in your chest once it finds shelter in your body.
Even though your lips produced sweet words
I could never get the sour taste out of my mouth
The most you could have done was give me something to wash it down with:
the leftover tears in Samantha Thompson’s eyes
above Wedgefield’s polluted night sky
somewhere in the middle of an empty field inside his pickup truck
between the words I’m and Sorry
the cleanest and most deceitful of them all
I doubted every word.
I never cared much for the empty spaces between the lines of college-ruled paper
They are only meant to be filled with even emptier phrases
If I could, I wouldn’t fill in any spaces in the time we were together
It would only make our story much more incredulous
Adding more would make us less real.
Two hearts in love need no words
but in reality, you did most of the talking
The ***** blanket of faith
is a cocoon of words shared only between you and him.
We, however, were alien to this Earth
We dissolved amongst the shadows of light
produced from lampposts, only to be thrown back into the light
whether or not you wanted to show me who you really were
You always fancied yourself in artificial lighting compared to natural lighting
Fearing the natural light would show the colors you only kept to yourself.
Lovebug ran to each light as quickly as he could
for these lampposts can only cover so much of the unknown
We’ll be together forever
He ran to each one until he was alone
Until he couldn’t find himself
Each shadow that was passed before can be seen, traced
however his new reflection is indiscernible
You can try your hardest to look into dry puddles
only to find something that is not so concrete.
The only words worth believing in are the ones that are burnt slowly afterward
Entre deux coeurs qui s’aiment, nul besoin de paroles.
But no matter how much the lampposts grow taller,
or how the spaces between ruled-paper continue to dance, the word
love will always be the easiest word to swallow
but the hardest to digest once it rots in the thick of your stomach.
Dec 15, 2015
Dec 15, 2015 at 2:20 PM UTC
Leo: Remember everyone is fighting. Be patient, forgive, but never allow yourself to be a doormat to those who care less about you than you do them. Forget the wrath. Find the joy in the power it brings you.
Virgo: Do not stunt your growth trying to entertain the opinions of other people. You know in the end, you have to be the most important person in your life. Grow.
Libra: Quit running. You will never find yourself in other people, so stop trying. Desperation does not look good around your neck. Hold your chin high and look inside yourself for what you need.
Scorpio: Go. Stop leaving claw marks in your wake. Know that what you think you need is not always so. You are worth more than what you have been selling yourself for. Pride is important to you, but it is still okay to cry if you need to. Say goodbye to what is less than you.
Sagittarius: It is okay to say no. Don’t apologize anymore for having an opinion. Speak your mind, let yourself be heard. Do not quiet your desires for someone else’s.
Capricorn: The past doesn’t matter anymore. Close the book, shut the door. Stop searching for answers and know that it all happened for a reason. It will make sense soon if you let it.
Aquarius: Do not make friends with your demons. Clean the skeletons from your closet. Take a long walk tonight and allow yourself to feel the weight of sadness like a moth eaten sweater. Fold it up in the morning and put it in a box. Throw it away.
Pisces: Stop being selfish and cruel. Put the bourbon away, put your phone away for the night. Sleep by yourself and see what you dream of. People are not trying to ruin you like you are them. Forget revenge.
Aries: Let go. Do not cling to what you think is saving you. Do not drink tonight, do not tell them you love them again if you do not mean it. Be careful to not push away the people who truly care for the one who doesn’t.
Taurus: It is time to stop caving in on yourself. Reach out to someone, stop to smell the flowers. Find beauty in this world again.
Gemini: You’re almost done hurting. I know your mother told you the storm never lasts forever and you doubted her. Let the rain leave you now. It is okay to not define yourself by your sadness.
Cancer: Let the things and people you are bitter about leave you. Do not let memories haunt you any longer. Wash them off in the river while it’s still warm. Baptize yourself.
Aug 12, 2015
Aug 12, 2015 at 8:18 PM UTC
Remember the times you caught me crying?
used to make up excuses when you won't stop prying.
I had no courage to tell you;
how many times I've doubted you.
Cause you meant more to me;
than any of my insecurities.
I was miserable, wasn't I?
used to vent out my feelings, didn't lie.
I loved him beyond limits, you knew;
the girls were fully aware too.
Maybe our bond wasn't strong,
or else I could've forgiven you.
Maybe the world didn't know,
how much I really tried to.
You had your reasons,
he was sad and depressed,
and you chose to go address;
leaving me in distress.
You called me your best friend,
then why did you hide it?
I was right there, a meter away from your bed.
You called me your best friend,
then how could you **** him?
in the same places, you knew I loved him.
You called me your best friend,
then how could you not know?
how deep a scar, your actions will carve.
Our bond was like a holy thread,
anything it could sustain,
cutting it once and tying a knot,
won't make it pure again.
Sister or sinister,
I am not sure anymore.
Friend or fiend,
perhaps you were both.
I wish I could lend a hand,
but it's harder for me to stand.
Roots that run so deep;
I had to fall to my knees.
You have many best friends,
so what if you lose one friend?
You made a choice and walked that path,
no good will come from seeking the past.
Look ahead, with no regret;
for I consider you, my kindest crook.
Jun 13, 2022
Jun 13, 2022 at 11:31 AM UTC
I searched for "truth"
I found weakness
Forever doubted theories compromise
To hide their failure through fragile lies
I searched for "justice"
I found corruption
The fairest laws defy morality
And relativity fights equality
I searched for "happiness"
I found the source
Jesus, my almighty savior
I found You in the poor
Help me love my neighbor
The way You love me
To keep this happiness
Flowing inside me
You stand by me
Suture me with Your affection
Understand me
Lead the path to my redemption
Helped me draw
The masterpiece in me
And withdraw
The shackles off me
Somehow, lost within Your stream
I ended up finding "truth"
Personal and general
Strangely irrefutable
The weak you redeemed
Lowered the powerful
Your perfect divine "justice"
Defies my human logic, empirical
yet so vulnerable
~Epic Monkey
Jan 11, 2014
Jan 11, 2014 at 4:30 PM UTC
After an exhausting day at work, I eagerly lie my restless head down
Plunge into my bed and put on my pillowed crown
Regardless of how soft and cool my pillow may be
The other side of the pillow, keeps beckoning me
And be one man, long I thought
For the previous night I had forgot
How the other side of the pillow feels?
What comfort the other side reveals?
Although, both sides equally lay
I contemplated flipping my pillow the other day
For in the morning I awoke in hot sweat
And wished I changed my previous bet
So tonight, I flipped my pillow over with ease
The coolness of the surface came over me like a breeze
Oh, how magical this side of the pillow can feel
Oh how happy am I? To have made this deal
I doubted if I should ever go back
Knowing what the other side may lack
Somewhere ages and ages hence, I’ll tell this story with a sigh
How overnight that side of the pillow grew warm and dry
Because in the morning my pillow was wet
For I had woken up in a hot sweat
Jan 26, 2015
Jan 26, 2015 at 4:41 PM UTC
High school life makes me quite weary, history can be quite dreary,
More than once the class has given me a cause to snore,
While I sat there, fingers drumming, some modern tune I started humming,
I didn’t see the teacher coming, coming in the classroom door.
Normally, she was quite cheerful, humming from the classroom door,
But today she gave a roar.
All the class sat still and silent, knowing that she could turn violent,
And all fearing lasting indent that she could leave upon their head.
All that time I watched with worry; - wishing I had thought to scurry
Out the door in fit and flurry - flurry from the pending dread -
From the sure and ceaseless source of impending dread -
I hid ‘neath my desk instead.
And the roaring, raving, ranting teacher started in on chanting;
Save me - brave me couldn't handle this kind of class;
Now I sat there, my mind wandering, all my thoughts were set on squandering
All she spoke, my brain was pondering, my attention couldn’t last -
As she spoke my brain was pondering and my attention couldn’t last -
I could never hope to pass.
All around me kids were shaking, but no move toward freedom making,
I began to wonder if they had a clue what was in store;
Maybe they had heard her coming, while I had been busy humming,
Fingers on the desk were drumming, drumming so I wouldn’t snore
Maybe they had had a warning - of whatever was in store; -
I hoped that she wouldn’t roar.
Sitting there in constant terror, worried I would make some error,
And thus bring about her wrath upon my mortal head;
But she made no move to strike me, showed no sign she planned to spite me
I doubted that she’d think to bite me, maybe growl at me instead?
This thought made me shiver slightly, i’d rather her roar instead -
At least I could keep my head.
She began to motion towards me, I knew it wasn’t to award me,
Perhaps she had noticed that i wasn’t wide awake?
Either way, She’d given order, so i began my journey toward her
Maybe some day I’d adore her? How many classes would it take?
How much of her pitiless lecturing would it take?
My own life was now at stake.
Now that I had done her bidding, she was at her desk, just sitting,
Watching me with those eyes and her never blinking stare;
Never once her gaze shifted, the corners of her mouth weren’t lifted
It was as if a sense of humor had never been formed there -
As if her face had never shown the signs of laughter there -
I pretended to not care.
All the while, my thoughts racing, I was at her mercy, pacing,
The room of classmates I was facing, but they had begun to snore;
i thought she was a fluke in staffing, until i heard her laughing
Now her sullen, cold, and serious mood I had no reason to deplore -
Those heartless hoards of homework were no reason to deplore -
I was scared of her no more!
Aug 28, 2012
Aug 28, 2012 at 5:43 PM UTC
Before everything
i. I never knew four letters could melt
menthol candy-like, hydrochloric acid on my tongue
and keep burning it in different degrees
I had to swallow back.
ii. That there would come a time
I'd have to baptize the pain in my chest like seasons
robbing me lungfuls
on January, September and December nights.
iii. That my blood was really ink I needed to stop using
before my skin turned paper-like.
iv. That my heart had an epicenter pumping a magnitude of earthquakes
that made me tremble helplessly in its intensity;
and that they were man-made calamities
followed by harsh, heavy, whipping tsunamis
to flood my grave of bleeding, jagged fault lines.
v. That aftereffects lasted longer than treatment itself,
and that I didn't need any professional diagnosis to know
I was terminal
from the same drug that made butterfly-strokes in my veins,
whose arms withheld the only elixir to this malady.
vi. I named my sickness, my pain, my agony like orphaned children, after you--
a rare disease
the doctors didn't even know about yet.
vii. I did and I doubted
but a part of me beat signals
that echoed off the cave walls of my skull
that I knew.
viii. Before everything,
I have been warned
but I chose to listen to the soothing, wrong, hopeful voices
"He means no harm,".
ix. You began spreading like an epidemic-- a tumor to a colony of cells all over me-- until I became you;
a reflection of familiar suffering and mortality, slowly withering away.
In the end, I didn't even have you to blame
for letting me overdose from intakes
of my own **** bitter medicine and unforgivable mistakes.
x. I guess, this was how you wanted the price to be paid.
Feb 18, 2017
Feb 18, 2017 at 6:24 AM UTC
The pain is still present,
steady as my heartbeat
but is no longer overtaking me
My heart aches
literally aches just by the thought of you
I want you to know that everything I said was true
and never have I doubted my love for you
So goodbye for now
hope to see you in my de ja vu
Aug 11, 2014
Aug 11, 2014 at 3:22 PM UTC
Our love was and will always be my favorite story cause he loved with a love that was more than love. Far greater and deeper than any man could ever love a woman such as herself. She was wild and unruly and quite stubborn. Although his young spirit and stubbornness matched hers, she couldn't help, but be pleased at the way he just understood her. Even when she wore her masks for the world, he knew the real one, the one she took off for only him to see. He knew what she was and still loved her, even when she doubted herself. Yet there were moments where she came alive and had such a confidence that could handle any and all situations. The way she could talk to anyone who crossed her path with such charm and flair. His way of life encouraged her to be equal as him and respected as so. Their love was unlike any other, they respected one another and it showed. He was and she was the best they ever had. They didn't need the world to see their moments of chaos they were private in that sense. They never talked bad about one another those discussions were behind closed doors. You could only get a glimpse into what true love looked like. What made them? Them? How he loved and tamed her at times? He proved over and over to her that he only loved her. He only looked for her, he only ever thought about her. The way she kept him always wanting and needing more of her. It was a love shared on common ground. Not full of misery and destruction that's never fully able to recover, no their love was better than that. Far greater than that. They had this bond that they shared and both understood their places when together and around others. Almost like this unbreakable force that held them tightly together by their unspoken love.
Yes! This was why it would always be my favorite love story because it was theirs.
Jul 28, 2015
Jul 28, 2015 at 5:47 PM UTC
If I could send a message in a bottle
Of every thought I’ve ever thought of you
It’d take a million years for you to read it
I bet I’d leave you speechless
Because I know that you’ve never doubted
Any love that’s true
If I could sail the ocean on a sailboat
I’d search around the world for you, my dear
I would even stop for a moment
Because you’re my one and only
And nothing would mean more to me
Than having you right here
I have this funny feeling that you’re waiting
Praying every night I’ll come around
Take you in my arms and give you comfort
Even though I was hurt
Because you took my heart into the air
And then dropped it to the ground
I wish that I would find you on an island
With nothing of your own but a cigarette
All alone and talking to no one
I will be your someone
Because I loved you at the darkest times
Just like the day we met
Dec 4, 2014
Dec 4, 2014 at 8:26 PM UTC
The good
The bad
And Me, The ugly
I'm not the first nor the last to be bullied
Ugly
For years I let that stick in my head
Doubted myself
Pills! I tried to end this life
But I'm growing
I like her
I like the girl in the mirror
I like her long face
Her brown eyes
Her dark, small lips
The scar on her thigh
Her tiny waist
Her coffee skin
Ugly?!
What is that?
Oh yah I know, the world
The world is ugly
But she
She
Is
B
E
A
U
T
I
F
U
L
Oct 24, 2016
Oct 24, 2016 at 3:09 PM UTC
~~○♢○~~
there was once
a girl unnamed
ever doubted
ever shamed
untamed fire
high & wild
she was a haunted
white-hot child
a wayward waif
she had no guide
no way to hold
her rage inside
*"you're a ***** little girl,
watch me as I wreck your world!"
bursting brain
as well as bubble
he brought her
a world of trouble
now unloved
unlovable*
charcoal lily
ragged ****
neglected garden
a bad seed
never knowing
her great need
a prickly thistle
tried to hide
all the pain
she held inside
chorus
for years she went on
in this state
unloved, unwise
and reprobate
no turning back
it was too late
wild parties
dating thugs
drinking *****
doing drugs
chorus
But deep inside
the little-girl-lost
a seed of faith
grew at last
she grabbed a hold
and held on fast
then, when things
were at their worst
she began
to hunger ~ thirst!
because her God
had loved
*her first!
"I've loved you, child.
I had a plan
long before the world began.
Please do not be sad or blue,
this destiny included YOU
you are SO important
to My story
you will bring Me such great
GLORY!
here below
in heav'n above
I'll show you how much
♡♡ YOU ARE LOVED ♡♡*
the woman changed
she was set free
who's the woman?
she is
ME
SøułSurvivør
(C) 8/16/2017
Aug 16, 2017
Aug 16, 2017 at 6:10 AM UTC
My last long distance relationship was with YaHWeH
And we’re on break
But when I can’t help myself
I drunk text him
Thumbs fumbling like they’ve forgotten
Keys I used to know with eyes closed
“Why do you give me emotions
If they are only going to be doubted?
Invalidated continuously?
What would it be like to feel something
Without being punished?
Prayer emoji, prayer emoji,
Cry emoji, upside down smile.”
And when the emotional puking is done
And I’ve resigned myself to silence
And acid green Listerine
The universe chimes
“One new message.”
Taking a deep breath,
Pushing down apprehension
And the nauseous excitement
Of a boy texting back
Read.
“They are not always thus.
Each time someone was there
In your corner,
Maybe not the most voices
Maybe not the loudest
But there.
You are the master of your destiny, Love
The master of your punishment
You do not have to feel punished
You are rejoice made flesh.”
Peaceful smile, peaceful smile
Kiss emoji.”
I pause, reading it once,
Then twice,
Swallowing then nodding
Keys now vaguely familiar.
“Sometimes I forget.
Shy emoji, shrug emoji,
Monkey covering eyes.”
“God is typing……”
“That is what I’m here for.”
Kiss emoji, smile emoji
Blushing beaming smile.”
Apr 22, 2018
Apr 22, 2018 at 2:53 PM UTC
do vampires sleep?
they don't.
i met a vampire
through a series of unpredictable events.
and this vampire, i must say.
despite being the only one,
might actually be the best one.
he wasn't cold,
and so i doubted.
why aren't you cold?
"because you give me warmth."
are you really a vampire?
i ask, and he replies,
with his stares that does not let me go.
a stare that got me locked not just in his eyes.
but also in his heart.
and so when i was so used to this setting.
came in, one cold evening.
that for the first time i have felt,
my warmth being unable to melt
all the shivers and cold sweats
i have proven he was a vampire.
when he has touched me with his cold hand,
cold eyes and his cold heart.
i wait for him in days.
i tell him that i miss him
in a way that i could.
and all i get is a cold wind.
this night, i am thinking
the vampire is asleep.
though, they never do.
it is more comforting than
knowing that this vampire is ignoring me.
so the vampire is asleep,
but (i hope) he has not forgotten
a human
locked inside
his cold,
cold heart.
Mar 10, 2020
Mar 10, 2020 at 11:40 PM UTC
Every night was tortellini
when were roommates.
I complained about my chapped feet;
you bought me the wrong socks.
Black, mens, I clarified,
but you kept buying the women's.
Then one day you got it right,
only they were for you
because black is a warmer color than white,
and the socks of a man felt like cherubs.
I complained about my chapped feet,
you the heart of the world,
its cold silence.
But we remained "alright".
You bought new pajamas every night
and painted a beauty mark on your face
to match.
Years of x-marked places on our bodies
which no one saw because
we were cynics,
I the most.
No roses at our mat--we grew our own bushes,
ordered the ones with the extra thorns.
I charmed that snake,
you bit me on its behalf.
That I'd do such a thing
was shameful.
We were girlfriends in a can of salt,
tears in our eyes, mouths and ears.
We drank wine in bubble baths in our clothes
for three days straight,
or even four,
after that guy dumped you.
From then on
every night was tortellini,
La Dolce Vita, and--
and the freckle below your ear,
the horns growing from my forehead,
the way your falsies touched your cheeks,
late nights looking brighter
than they should,
than they normally would.
Pretending to be goddesses awaiting their gods--
while I awaited you.
Then you felt them too,
touched my head as though it were a fever.
I always knew you hated the suburbs,
and I did listen
when you complained about the gray rooftops
and the saturated green lawns--
"Give them a chance, please.
Then we'll get away--"
I begged, I relented--
The wine, finally, fermented.
You remember what I said next,
because after that you broke my heart.
I never doubted it was a bad idea
to say it
but I said it
and you left.
Aug 3, 2015
Aug 3, 2015 at 8:15 PM UTC
Phrase ten.
To that boy who grabbed my *** or snapped my bra strap,
It was never cute or *****
In middle school it was annoying,
Now it's just creepy.
Phrase nine.
To that girl who thought it was really classy,
To spread rumors about my *** life.
What I do in bed does not involve you.
And if you want it to?
Sorry, honey, but I don't date haters.
Phrase eight.
To everyone who judges me because of my job.
If you are an adult,
I'm in high school.
If you are in high school,
I bet I have more money than you do.
And if not,
I have to actually earn it.
Phrase seven.
To everyone who thinks I am some genius.
I'm really not...
I fear for my future every day.
My grades aren't that hot,
But they're not awful.
I just don't go flaunting them in everyone's faces.
Phrase six.
To all of my friends who think it's their job to compare,
How awful their lives are to mine.
I tend to zone out when you start ********
I know, I am being a hypocrite,
Because I probably do that same thing.
But I kind of have a short attention span,
And very little tolerance for ********
Phrase five.
Aren't you thrilled that you are half way there?
To my sister, who has to slightly outdo me in everything,
I truthfully do not know if you realize that you do this.
I love you to death, but could you try to tone it down
Just a little bit?
Phrase four.
To my parents, who I know love me endlessly.
But to whom I often feel like a failure.
I know your other daughter is perfect,
But I am not her.
I am me,
And yes I have a little extra meat on my bones.
But frankly,
I'm not really ashamed of that.
Phrase three.
To my ex-boyfriend,
Who I still chat with time and again.
I do still love you.
But our relationship was toxic,
And either though neither one of us wanted to end it,
It isn't like we would have gotten married.
Phrase two.
To all my current friends,
You guys are beautiful.
And although sometimes I do not feel like I have
Enough of you,
I have just the right ones.
Thank you for making life to this point,
A little bit more bearable for me.
Phrase one.
To everyone who has judged me, called me a **** doubted me
And who thinks I am a lost cause,
Go **** yourselves.
Jan 5, 2014
Jan 5, 2014 at 10:34 PM UTC
when i was just a little girl
mama said, "you're the prettiest girl in the world"
and at four years old, sitting with a mirror
i batted my big green eyes, and simply believed her
for this was just something that i'd always been told
it was a fact of the world that i was beautiful
six years old, with long, blonde curls
and mama said, "you're the prettiest girl in the world"
i remembered the phrase, but doubted her words
i had no front teeth, and a voice too soft to be heard
but it must've been true, 'cause mama's don't lie
but how could it be that the prettiest girl would be so shy?
eight years old, with a baseball cap on my head
"you're the prettiest girl in the world," mama said
i looked down at my soccer jersey and cleats
"if i'm so pretty how come i have such big feet?"
but mama didn't miss a beat, she was so smart
she said, "you're prettiness shines through your great big heart"
ten years old, with a notebook and a pencil full of lead
"you're the prettiest girl in the world," mama said
i barely heard the words, and decided i was fat
pretty girls like shopping, not books and baseball bats
and the pretty girls don't need to constantly be reading
because when you see a pretty boy, a pretty girl is leading
twelve years old, and wishing i was dead
"you're the prettiest girl in the world," mama said
i knew it was a lie, and i was severely ******
if i'm so pretty then what are all these ugly scars left on my wrist?
but i nodded to my mother, and told her that i knew
maybe i was dying, but i wouldn't bring mom down, too
fourteen years old, lying in my bed
"you're the prettiest girl in the world," mama said
i knew it was a lie, but i'd made my peace with that
i'd always be a little ugly, i'd always be a little fat
i didn't look like a model, but that was okay
i never would be pretty, but who cares, anyways?
now i'm fifteen, and i'm starting to be okay
"you're the prettiest girl in the world" is what mama will say
i know i'm not the prettiest, but more importantly, i'm kind
real beauty isn't in the face, real beauty's in the mind
i'm learning to accept the hand that i've been dealt
and i'm starting to heal my heart after all the pain i've felt
Jan 14, 2014
Jan 14, 2014 at 9:45 PM UTC
To quote Athos from "The Three Musketeers"
"You are not a woman
You are a demon escaped from Hell"
When I first met you as a colleague
I made the mistake
Of getting friendly with you
When I should have ensured
That our relationship was going to be strictly professional
Of course, you had your own ways
Of charming those whom you came in contact with
That is something for which I have to give you credit
Albeit grudgingly
And you were an expert
At playing the victim card
Nevertheless, after I changed jobs
I thought I had seen the last of you
However, you came back into my life
As unexpectedly as the recent rains in Chennai
Initially, it seemed kind of sweet
However, I should have realised sooner
That you had certain ulterior motives
Unfortunately, I got fooled by your sweet talk
And started helping you financially
Because you looked up to me as a brother
I never doubted you in the slightest
Which was probably the biggest mistake of my life
You took advantage of me
In the worst way possible
And kept draining my bank account
Your lies kept getting taller and taller
And I kept believing them
Because, you had me well and truly under your thumb
However, even the most credulous person in the world
Can develop suspicions at some stage
Thus, after years of being in a psychological coma
I finally managed to wake up to the harsh reality
And told my family everything
Of course, with the help of a dear family friend
After we finally confronted you
You signed a written agreement
Promising to return all my money
Within a certain deadline
That deadline has long since passed
And you have not paid even ten percent of your dues
What is worse
Is the fact that you are absconding
And giving absolutely nonsensical reasons
Which even an utter fool would find it difficult to believe
You ruined my life
Destroyed my happiness
And shattered my self-confidence
Is this the way you treat a person
Whom you have addressed as "brother"
Not once, not twice, but several times?
I am giving you one last chance
Not for your sake
But for the sake of humanity
You had better take it
Because, if not
Then you will soon find yourself in prison
Again, to quote Athos
"You are not a woman
You are a demon escaped from Hell"
May 8, 2023
May 8, 2023 at 10:45 AM UTC
I believe that you are lovely, I believe that you are wonderful, I believe that you are a kind and caring person even if no one sees you in that way. And I believe that you are beautiful/handsome. I don’t need to know who you are, see who you are or talk to you for me to know these things.
A lot of people don’t see it that way though, a lot of people believe that they have the right to judge others based on their appearance, on what they wear, how they talk and what they do. But that is wrong. Very wrong. They have no right to judge you if they don’t know you, no one does.
Don’t ever let someone make you feel bad for who you are today. Because you happen to be someone wonderful. Forget about the haters. Forget about the people who give you **** Forget about all the people who have doubted you and live your life.
I want you to stop worrying about what other people think about you. I want you to stop caring about the people in your life who don’t truly matter. I want you to do what you love. I want you to stop worrying about all these opinions on yourself, on what you do because they don’t even matter. I want you to forget about; all the and things from the past and cherish the good things. I need you to love yourself for who you are. Don’t do anything you don’t feel comfortable with doing. Be a ***** only when you have to be. Smile, even when you’re hurting, show people how strong you can be, how strong you really are. **** happens, forget about it everything that has caused you pain. If it stays with you, it will only cause you more pain. Life is too short to be living with regrets. Throw them all away, don’t think about it. Mistakes are made for a reason. There is no point dwelling on the past, because all that matters is. NOW. Don’t let the past break you, make it define you. Don’t go searching for someone, chances are they won’t even be the right one,. Let them come to you, because they’re making an effort to be yours. Then you’ll know that it was worth the wait.
Stay Beautiful ,
-A
May 25, 2013
May 25, 2013 at 6:33 AM UTC