dog
on a
leash

used
to
it

An apple fell from a tree.
Did it want to fall from that tree?
Where it was so secure and cozy,
only to hit the ground of reality.

It will never come back to that tree,
it's stems have been cut off.
It'll fend for itself,
but that's hard for an apple to do.

If I should fall in love with you
You'll never know my feelings true
I'll keep that **** under my hat
Pretend I don't know where it's at
And silently I'll pine away
Though never in the light of day
Like some lovelorn ethereal ghost
Beneath black skies this love I'll host

I'll glance your way through shaded eyes
And tell myself a million lies
To keep my heart safe and alone
Locked up tight in its cage of bone
Til I am sure the chance has passed
When you've moved on, I'll breath at last
If I should fall in love with you
I'll deny it til we are through.

There is a longing somewhere deep deep within me
Deeper than the hurt
Deeper than the pain
Deeper than my depravity
Deeper than my darkness
Deeper than my own human will
That longs to sing out
That longs to shout
That longs to cry
That longs to long to long
To hold onto something permanent
That longs for an anchor in this ever-screaming sea
That longs for a line tied around my waste as I seemingly cascade down this sheer mountain side
That longs for a compass in the evil dense of my thoughts
That longs for a glimmer of a door in a windowless room
That longs for a hidden key in the floorboards of my captors dungeon
That longs for a drink of something wet and not dry
That longs for something more stable than the stilts to which my feet are tied
That longs for something more steady than the sways and swifts of the tower to which I have been hoisted
In all of these things and more I am a survivor
In all of these things and more I am a witness to they’re in-permanency
In all of these things and more I am a survivor
Only because of the revelation of something to which I can cling to
in tragedy, that is convinced it must continue to move

"The Longing" -JP

How insulting to You, precious Lord, I have been.
My efforts are spent seeking to please merely men.
Although, they're as imperfect and lowly as I,
Yet, I’ve held their unworthy opinions too high.
When my attention should be set firmly on You,
Who appreciates all that I am and I do.
It wavers when I look into judgmental eyes
And fear of mistakes creates Your presence’ disguise.
Consuming frustration! I will never be free,
If I try to determine what they think and see.
Genuine satisfaction can only be found
After losing myself in a worship unbound.
My heart’s open to You but to man it is sealed.
Only there, my perfection through Christ is revealed.

you can hold me in
but can’t take me out
I’m somewhere within
but not what you’re about
I’ll give you my nightcall
****, you have my all
and that’s my downfall
cause’ you can only give me what’s been left
since you never retrieved the rest
the bits others hold
those who’s love for you grew old
they took the pieces of your heart
little bits of who you are
leaving you with all sorts of scars
and you never got back the parts
of your beautifully damaged heart
but I can see what you are
amazing like the moon and stars
but just so crazy far
and I need you undivided
all the way decided
on having me
and the mess I can be
totally sure
so I can feel secure
you just have to retrieve
the pieces that are scattered
so I know you won’t leave
and that we really matter

I take a huge step
To be right in front of her
So she's safe and sound

I hope you're well,
I hope you're warm,
I hope you're safe,
I hope you're happy.

'Cause I'm alright,
But I'm cold,
But I'm scared,
But I'm sad.

There's lots of things
I'm worried about.
I'm scared that you'll change your mind,
I'm scared you'll walk out.

And I wonder,
If you're worried too.
If you are,
Then I wish I could
Show you you're wrong.

There's lots of things
I'm scared about.
I'm worried you'll find something better,
I'm worried you'll walk out.

But I remember
Your arms around me,
And I remember
Everything you've told me.

And I wonder if
You're scared too,
Or if you miss me too.

I hope that you're not,
I hope that you don't.

'Cause missing someone
Is the worst feeling to have,
When they're still a week and three days
From your arms.