there's a certain beauty in the unknown.
a certain beauty in not knowing if
you're as crazy about me as i am about you.

there's a certain beauty in knowing that
my heart is ******* in such a knot that even
a seasoned boy-scout would cringe at the sight of it,
all because of you.

so many nights i have spent looking at the moon,
hoping you were doing the same.

and oh-so many nights have been spent swallowing
pills with various numbers inscribed on their very surface,
just to try to forget about your absence.

but the thing about the unknown and drugs and the moon
is that none of them can even come close to the beauty
that you possess.

I write about my pain and my sorrow,
and I try not to think,
about any bliss or happiness I may feel inside.

I fill myself with hate and despair,
I dwell upon the dark,
and not let any light shine in.

I do not let myself know love nor hope,
for I cannot let myself feel,
in this backwards, mirror world.

I fell down the rabbit hole of my favorite book

Mind over matter,
Don't mind the things that don't matter,
Don't let negative thoughts make your confidence shatter,
Let's get personal on a stranger level,
See what I did there?,
I see what you did where,
Where you pretend to be victim to your mind living unaware,
Sometimes I seems like you don't know you're pretending,
Spiraling down a scary path your descending,
Seems like this rabbit hole is never ending,
Like I said before its all mind over matter,
In wonderland your the queen, the cat, and the mad hatter,
It's doesn't matter your gender your still Alice,
Chasing this cheese loosing this rat race,
Theres a way out you just transcend gravity,
Look to the coulds take a walk with me,
The easy way up is I guess to take the ladder,
Or you could jump,
Its all mind over matter.

In an endless corridor of mirrors as clean as snow,
Me and my friends grasp each other with loose open arms and smile
As we dive into the mist of recognition and truce.