ripped from the sacred slumber
that held me in its embrace
and awakening to this reality
staring me in the face--
I look around with blinking eyes
and wonder if all this that I see--
the burning flames upon the wall
is truly meant to be--
surely this is just a dream
and not reality at all
and then I hear a distant scream
and my name being called
soon the smoke engulfs my room
no hope to make an escape--
and I feel an impending doom
unable to deny what I know is fate
I lay in my bed, close my eyes
and beg for forgiveness while I wait...

I found myself floating in the dark dungeon
gasping for breath--for it was filled with murky water
and all I could do was float (I don't know how to swim)--
I opened my eyes and no light came through
only wet and cold and bone chilling pain
and I considered for a moment (or was it two or three)
of just letting go
and allowing the murkiness to swallow me--
all I would have to do
is stop trying to float
and allow myself to sink below
I so wanted to just allow it, to just let go
and suddenly I awake
and here I am, dry to the bone
and wondering why, god, why
am I so alone?

Turned on the television
for the first time in many a day
had to shut it off poste haste
as everything they had to say
was full of venom and hate
and horrors that I cannot understand
sometimes I wish I would have been born
in a far away distant land.

Perhaps I came into this realm
at the most inopportune time--
should have come along years long ago
way back before machine guns were involved in crime--
should have been here
during the horse and buggy days
working on a ranch somewhere
sowing seeds and baling hay...

I have to fight the urge each morning
to leave and run far far away
to run into the woods and find a tree
where I can hole up and stay
and forget the horrors and hatred all around
that seems to be
this lifetime's favorite and unending sound...

Turned on the television
for the first time in many a day
had to shut it off poste haste
as everything they had to say
was full of venom and hate
and horrors that I cannot understand
sometimes I wish I would have been born
in a far away distant land.

wandering and wondering
through this long
drawn out night,
my body screams
for sleep
my mind yearns
for peace
my heart aches
for love~~
wondering
aching
yearning
would that I could fly
away from here
to find eternal peace
perhaps to transition
into a most serene
and beautiful
mourning dove...