How far would you love me
if I stripped it all away,
sold off all my attachments,
achievements—
would you love, love me at my most plain state?
With no strings attached?

Would you hold my hand
and tell me:
"It's okay, you're more than your accolades"?
Look at me straight in the eyes, you accept me,
and my cracks, in my skin.

Would you help me get back
the map to who I want to be—
go on the road trip to finding
my true self?

When the sun sets down
and I heal,
would you still keep me...

if I had nothing to give you,
only able to give the things
that no one ever wanted?

Would you hold my hand
while I break down
and say I’m nothing
without the things
that I gave away?

Would you still look at me as—

Enough—

Enough to help me clean up
this mess I've made?

Today, tomorrow,
would you still—
love me,
still think
I’m smart,
handsome—
even if I have nothing
to show, to give?

Would you still look at me
like i was different,
even though—
all my trees are chopped down?

Brush, and hold my hand
like nothing ever fell apart,
the grass wasn't as green—
as it used to be.

Hold my hand,
never let go
while we hike
up this mountain toghther.

Unlit Hours

Late nights—
they’re the worst for me,
bringing out the worst in me.
Mind racing,
like it hurts to think.
Not a moment of peace—
fighting myself just for a second.

Fighting peace like—
there is no hope.

I wish I could help,
but it’s hard—
when I hate myself.
Can’t stand who I am.
Lately,
the only relief I find
is in causing—

more pain,
more defeat.

These late nights,
they make me feel
like I’m not worth it.
When I get love,
I throw it away—
feeling undeserving.

Cold, alone, I shiver
at the thought
that night is coming.
It knows how to find me.

Dark thoughts consume me—
every night.

I don’t want to die,
I just want relief.
But I can’t have it.

I’m a broken record—
but I let it play.
I’m used to this feeling.
Is this what I was meant to be?
How I was meant to feel?

Every morning, it’s me—
looking through the glass,
waking up in this body—
wanting to throw it away.
I sell myself lies
that things are getting better...

and I still buy them.
But they’re running out of stock.

Knee-deep
in the darkness that I made—
of my own actions.
The night controls me,
makes me feel worthless,
hopeless—
I hate myself.

Like there’s no daylight in sight.

Dear anxiety,

i know you still cling to me
like clockwork, you never fail
to show up,
control my every move,
like a puppet and its master—

pulling the strings

making me look at my life
through a mirror,
yet I'm forever scared—

to lose you—
old friend.

i walk around in a haze,
but you're there to comfort me,
a static noise i can't turn off

old friend—

i can't sleep without you
sleeping beside me,
sending shivers down my spine,

i feel you touching me,
with your cold breath.

i shiver - I'm scared—
of what you do to me.


but i let you stay.

you influence my speech,
put words in my mouth—
that i didn't want to say.

make me stutter,
’cause i can feel you

clawing at the door—

to let you in
when everything seems calm

i always let you back in

i ask you to leave,
but you make me stutter—

You poison me—

and i end up
begging you to stay

you know you're my weakness.

you may burn everything to the ground,
everything i have—
but i can't get rid of you—

i always hear you calling my name
answer it in a heartbeat, old friend—

you understand me and comfort me,
I'm addicted to the feeling of drowning,
with tears running down my face
I'm addicted to the ghost inside of me—

i hate you
but i still let you in

i regret it.

i stopped feeling
and started accepting—
that you're always here,
you're part of me.

My heart—frozen still,
searching for the will
to forget you.

The alcohol takes its course.
Tears slide down my cheeks
as I try,
fail,
try again
to forget you.

Was my love real?
Or just something to play with—
fooled by the warmth,
cut by your words,
sharp as paper.

You made my heart ache.
Still, I stayed.
Now you just make the alcohol
taste sweeter—
and the night colder—
with every sip.

It's okay,
the drink—
is the love I need for the night.

Our favorite song—
all I can hear
is us singing it
with our whole hearts.

Was it love,
or just—
need?

Every memory in my head—
crumbles.
'Cause all I have now is this bottle
to pour my tears into—
to remember every lie,
you shakily whispered,
in my ears, holding hands.

Now you're gone.
All I have left
is the drink—
we used to share.

They say life is a show that must go on,
but what happens when the show is over,
when the music fades,
the sun sets, and the curtains close?

Will everyone forget the wrong I've done,
the pain I caused?
Will they clap when the show is over—
find reasons for me to be missed?

Will the ones I love—
when they feel empty—
keep me
in their memory?

I've caused pain,
made people cry,
broken hearts—
but will any of that matter
when the curtains close?
Tears have been shed.
Will they care what I've done?
Will they stutter my name?

Will I be able to rest easy—
knowing everyone thinks of me fondly,
and leaves out the rest?

The ones who once hated me,
will they be able to forget,
and love me for the memory I bring—
leave out the rest?

Please, find a reason for me to be missed.
Forget the rest.

Time is ticking—
I only have so much—
time,
before the curtain
makes the credits roll.

Please, don't resent me
for the things I've done.

Leave the hatred,
leave the pain,
the tears—
with the closing curtains.
Find reasons to miss me.
Let me live as a fond memory—
before my time comes,
and the curtains close.

I built myself a glass house,
A chamber of mind,
A house built so fragile
Afraid of the darkness that consumes below.

Glass shards that slowly break, reflecting the past,
I shake through the chamber of mind, afraid the voices might call again,
Shadows pressing closer, where is my path, unclear,
Glass shatters around me as I fall to my knees begging it to stop, but am trapped in a storm of my fragile thoughts,

Surrounded by a version of myself everyone wants me to be—
I reach out, but am bound to chains, unable to break free from my shackles,
I cry out for help, but the shadows of fear, helplessness and doubt, claw away at me,
Kicking and screaming in silence, but no one can hear me plea,

Slowly drowning myself, in a deep sea that never seems to end,
Every string of hope I once had is being ****** away into this glass house,
In A silent prison I lay.
While the others shine brightly, this glass house consumes my light.
In this glass house every step I take is a crack left behind, later to be discovered.

Trapped in this glass house.
Trapped but free,
Everyone sees me smile, but in this glass house I'm trapped in the version they long me to be

In this glass house I am strapped down to my knees hoping someone would come save me,
I can feel my chest tighten, each breath is another rush of panic through my veins.
Is this effort I worth the pain, I wonder.
Wonder if one day the cracks of the glass will show a path forward towards a better tomorrow
Tomorrow filled with acceptance, love and care

But today, I'm trapped in this chamber of mind, trapped bound by my own insecurities and doubts,
I claw at the walls, seeing myself, a person I no longer recognize,
Am I just left here imprisoned, until the glass breaks, and I shatter into pieces, taking years to heal from the glass wounds I endure.

I am not enough—
I am not ENOUGH!
I AM NOT ENOUGH.

Slowly losing in the depth of these walls
As if no one cares enough to see my true colors
Will anyone reach out to see my true self?
Before I shatter into dust
Losing everything.

Will tomorrow be the day I can finally break free?
Or am I stuck in today forever.

I AM NOT ENOUGH
I AM NOT ENOUGH, I say to myself

In this glass house I am stuck being the person I secretly hate
But everyone else loves—

But please tell me—
Am I enough?

Am I strong enough to break free from my own mind—
And its demons that I live with,
Am I strong enough to become the person I want to be?

Am I strong enough to bring light back into this glass house—
To break free and rebuild what once was beautiful.

But maybe, just maybe,
these cracks aren’t my undoing—
they are my escape.

The glass that once imprisoned me
will not define me.

I am not the reflection they see,
nor the shadows that haunt me.

I am more than my doubts,
more than my fears.

With every fracture, light seeps in,
revealing a path I never thought existed.

I will not shatter into nothingness—
I will break free.

I will rise from these shards,
not as the person they expect,
but as the person I choose to be.

And when the glass finally falls away,
I will stand, whole,
unafraid,
and finally—
enough.

Mother nature sings,
Mother nature weeps of joy,
She rushes to open every window,
Letting the euphoria sink in,
She reaches out and hugs the world,
Her voice so powerful,
Her golden tears dripping down,
Turning everything a fairytale,
Opening up her golden gates.

The trees they have long been deprived of mother natures touch,
At last, there seen, she hugs them tight,
For they have waited far too long-
The leaves turn crimson,
As she gently paints them.

The people wake up to natures gift,
The wind warm yet it still brushes you away, it echoes autumn's name.
Everything is a warm hug,
The world is maturing,
A toddlers dream,
So full of color-
A real life color book,
Full of crimson—gold and amber too.

Waking up in natures arms.
With sparkle in its eyes.

The world,
Wakes up,
On the day of autumn.