A poet compiling a story from chaos crafted by reality
Sharing his mind and hoping it'll bring him sanity
Begging for a solution to a story riddled with ash and snow
Blinded and reaching out to a boy hidden in shadows
Bound by memory, lost in the moments before
How sad a story that has to do with a poet like this; a bore.
.
.
.
He didn't grab his attention, left to a lack of chemistry
Hoping to be a good boy, good friend...with whatever that is

We will see how this story unfolds.

Heart
It desires to bind two that corrupt their natures
Pounding at its door, hoping to leap out into a new story
Heart
Pained, it complains, as it should
How unfair, how expected.

Snow
So complex and simple, ice formed art created from the tears of the sky, cast collectively, crafted by the pain the world shivers...
Hoping to coat the world, maybe then will it feel peace.
Snow
Sharing many forms, wet, dry, sticky...I wonder, what you want...
that answer is simple; the heart

Ash
Seeping somberly from the remains of the forgotten
Sad yet beautiful in your own way, complex yet so ordinary, compiled of the tears of destruction. Why do you glow so confusingly? How I wish you'd glow forever...because you want to be beautiful, but you leave stains on the heart

This is a sad love story, but it has a chance to change

In the silence, coated in reservation
Bleak and desolate the dark blue soul,
Unaware of the concluding conspiracy,
A ponderance gifted from a being of coal
Contrasting confliction comprised of confused conceptions,
Crafted chaotically by the mind a tot contracted
Fated curiously, forested and forlorn
My muse, how i hope the best will happen.

Red is a warning that comes in many wonders...

flags
liquids
pigments
temperatures
symbols
figures..­.

feelings.

Red, what an interesting color.

Hearts, Anger, Passion, Danger...

Just a wonder, a color.

The order shifted into chaos the moment I met you...

and now I'm falling gracefully...

curious, I wonder, what do you ponder...

Like a pool piled of puzzles...

You surprise me, and then you don't...not that it hurts me to be so...

What do you see when you look at me...

Those eyes of yours, big, brown, full of sadness.
I've wondered why, but I've seen a bit of your soul.
You wander in darkness, you're all alone, you claim that you like it,
But I can see that that's wrong.
You want something much better, but you're stubborn, like me.

You're no ordinary boy, and that, I can see.
But you do ordinary things, and it's because you think you should.
You think you're the one in control, but has that done you any good?
When we take control, we fall in our tracks.
And the harder our fall, the bigger the cracks.

You claim that you're evil, I think that you're sad.
You want so much power, but you'll just go mad.
I want so much better for you, I really do.
But you have to see why it concerns me, the things that you pursue.

What are your intentions, unordinary man?
I hope you'll decide to be good because I know that you can.

It's a game we all play,
Dressing up and playing hideaway
It might as well be Halloween every day
Cause people become actors, pretending to be okay

Ghosts come lurking every night,
First, they're there, then out of sight
Attached to some, now that's a fright
A typical day for some of us to fight

Not every rainbow road is a perfect passage
Some won't last, beautifully tragic
Not an uncommon life, it's not that shocking
A typical day for those who lost their hoping

Glaring
Gunning down the image
Hope
Something, you will see it
Believe it
Conceive it
I need you to read it
Desire the solution
The need to know
To hold on to answers
The things I can show
Please ponder my heart
And ponder your own
Do I love you
Do I love you
Can I want to...

You're
everwhere
shadowing
.


my entirety.

I didn't want to let go...
of all of our memories
of the long lost nights talking
of the dreams we'd share to one another
of the interest that was once mutual.

I didn't want it to change...
at least not into this
i liked you so much
i couldn't tell you what this feeling is.

But you let me go, and I fell on your shallow ground...
i wasn't the prettiest, so you didn't want me
i wasn't the funniest, not entertaining
i'm not the most colorful, so you didn't see me
but you used to...what happened?

Yet, after I told you that I couldn't watch you disappear...
and although you didn't seem to care
somehow, i felt relieved.

Because it wasn't you that I was going to lose...
but just another part of me.
i saved my self, and i got away.
i truly cared for you
after all the things telling me not to...
and you let me get away.
thank you

Sometimes I peek into Etheria,
Because I ponder where my soul lives,
Casually gliding in the ethereal area,
Trembling cascading chaotic abyss,
Casual sensations indulging in the journey sought.

It's overwhelming, what the power of thought can do;
Place you in realities broad and new,
A contented choke up on surprises, unexpected,
Setting a foundation for limitation is rejected.

What I found in the realm of wonder, Etheria,
From the glimpse, the journey, into an endless inside,
A song, sung so deeply and profoundly,
That only when I touched my face from hysteria,
Had I discovered my very soul, and from that, I cried.

This sorrow, unforgiven, Hollow, be thy name.

The screams, they come, the pain has won, as cursed and filled with aggression.

Give me today some mercy instead, and forgive me my debt, and I might just feel better.

And please change this sensation, and make hope believable.

Words cannot describe the feeling of sinking faster and faster into a

never-ending chain of darkness, fear for a perpetual resolve that will

never come.

A pulsation of many emotions, just to be left with the agony of

emptiness.

Hollowed out like a dead man's skull,

A soul carved out of a now disposable casket.

Hollow, be thy name.

Sometimes I can't help but smile when you come by.

Nonchalantly moving throughout your routine riddled day.

I ponder if I exist in your world; if I'm an important part of your story...
or just another piece in your background.

Who am i to you?

Who will I be, mystery man...?


                                            Often times I glance over, wondering if you'll ever desire to converse with me.

                                           Sometimes I lose myself in the forbidden realm of fantasy.

                                                  I don't want to wander into misfortune.

                                                    ­                        I don't want to like you...
but with every glance over, i find it harder to look away.

                                                       There are little longing lost thoughts  where i know my fear is wiser.

                                               I'll never be able to tell you these things... and you'll never know how compelling you are to me; a stranger in your world;

                                     Inviting you into mine.

Sometimes suddenly, I feel dejected.
Ejected from my previous emotion and rejected by any positive concoction.
Somehow, abruptly, I feel embedded in the thickest soot of sadness, heavy ashes of gloom suffocating my heart and all of its assets.

Sometimes I get bitten by a glumbug, and a blue sky could turn gray, I could be known to be the talker, but have nothing to say. My mind doesn't mind being a bully and having it's way...as if my soul began to rapidly decay.

I'm glumbugged like spontaneously combusted, explosively sickened by this destructive construction. Depravity shaking and waving in motion, corrosive to my life and the future that's open.

Potent, its bite, the glumbug. Random, sudden, terrifying. Like the chilly wind that death carries, or a gut's intuition; like a sign of misfortune. What an awe-inducing contraption.

Dear Soulmate,
Wherever you are,

I hope to meet you, want you to meet me, hope you stay after what you see, hope we laugh, we go on an adventure, a voyage, a journey, wish life was simpler.

I ponder about you from time to time, wonder the journey you're upon. Who you are, what you like, if you'll see this, if we'll meet online, in a dream, or offline...

Hope to meet you one day, soulmate,
wherever you are

Ever had the urge to sneeze but just when it was about to come out it doesn't?

Ever sneezed and it hurt because it was too hard, so sneezing wasn't as nice as it usually is?

Sometimes you ever eat something so good or do something so bad for the sake of "good" but regret it later?

Ever wanted to cry or scream or just....nvadjknajnvsknv, yet your body didn't seem to agree?

Ever looked in the mirror and realized the person you were looking at isn't the same person you once innocently acknowledged as you when you were younger?

Ever think about the fact that your reflection is looking back at someone else with far worse than any strangers judgment?

Ever smiled in someone's face when you wanted to die, just so that you wouldn't **** their mood?

Ever just chewed on food but didn't dare swallow because you were too fat to deserve to eat for the day?

Ever had them whispering in your ear how worthless, valueless, pointless and otiose you were?

Ever been so drugged up on depression that the only thing you held as truth was the poison you'd willingly swallow called mental abuse and pessimism?

Ever wanted to scrub your skin and erase its color, paint it darker, perm your hair straight no matter the chemicals, fry it to fro no matter the damage, hurt yourself with self-hatred, wanted to just cease to exist because you feel like at least your family for once would actually get along or care about someone if you were gone, because you're not what they got to control?

Ever just silently suffered and forgot?

Ever went through some traumatic experience and was forced to "let go" because no one else cared?


Felt any pain or discomfort reading this?


Well, that's my demon for you.

Never really had a bully bigger and worse than my emotions.
Come as a friend, shift into a demon, pour so much sadness into me
I
Could
Drown...

                Such a scary enemy, my emotions can truly be. Playing tricks on me...am I the kid?
Playing tricks on me.

Thinking thoughts that thwart the trail
Blocking bypaths because bullies behave brashly

All these puzzle pieces sinking my mood quickly uh-oh

Constant circle back to him, causing my fear oh no
No wonder I cower when my emotions bully me.

I hope you got what you came for.
Now give your review.
I guess I'm a product right,
Hope you enjoyed me too.

There was once a feeling when talking to you
That held up my hope and gave me a smile
A feeling for you, where the gates of this world
The struggles it could provide couldn't touch me
Inspiration passively grew, fluttering it's little wings around my head
Ideas and desires fueling my day
You had a potency like no other
But that made you dangerous too.

You had a wrap on me like no other
Capable of captivating my mentality and sending me off
into depravity, silently sickened by the tragedy of losing me or you
What a world, where the same person that bought me joy could also play with my heart like a toy

Clingy.


Clinging onto the little things you once said
                                                            ­           I'll
                                                            ­         never
                                                           ­          leave
                                                           ­           you
                                                  ­                       .

But had you been more honest, we wouldn't be here...

Erasing memories to make up for sanity.
The things you said to me, why...?

No necessary reason to hold onto a false rope, made out of lies and false hope...

Am I being clingy?
For wanting to know why I feel like you've died?

Am I being stingy, for holding my tears so I wouldn't cry?
Why was it so easy...to tell me a story but not the end?
Why did I ever comment back, risking my heart by pushing send?

I can't say i've fallen, but I do need a helping hand...
Cause here I am feeling this way...
And now i'm sinking in quicksand.

There is a caterpillar inching his wee body across a leaf that fell, somewhere.

Gently existing, almost alone.

The winds could **** him.
The rain could **** him.
The dirt full of other bugs could **** him.

So many things, all around his wee little existence...
So very vulnerable, and nearly alone in a world full of life...


But that caterpillar inches his way through the leaf, eating and inching his way through his path.

Because his path will lead to a cacoon.
And a cacoon, though even more vulnerable, leads to transformation.


And when that caterpillar cracks through that cacoon, the shell that, although made him weak and easy to ****, stuck, and seemingly obsolete, it also caused him to shock the world.

He will become a butterfly.
And some will see him as unworthy, still.
Most, honestly.

But haven't you ever heard...
A butterfly can flap their fragile little, beautiful, wings and create a hurricane big enough to change thousands or millions of lives somewhere.

Setting in motion events that may not have happened if he weren't there. And in all events, something important is revealed; which ultimately makes him just as important.


So in conclusion, he may be small, weak, unappealing, vulnerable, boring, easy to ****, break, or bury...but he also has a transformation.

He is delicately dangerous, a gentle healer, and a permanent inspiration in many lives.

He was important as a caterpillar.
He is important as a butterfly.

Sentenced to a fading vision
In this rippling madness consistently beating
slower
slower
Noises racing from here
and there
as it all starts to fade away
oh scared we are
this is it
this is real
Numb falling faster asleep
and the pain starts to wither, decay
Do i want to go
Do i want to stay
tears stream down my face
it gets hard to breathe
everything is shutting down
i'm scared
am i
i don't know
i see nothing
the sounds muffled
i see stars
its so cold
im gone

Genuinely speaking
i'm scared...
   that i'll lose the heart i've held onto for so long.
because of people who've already lost theirs.

A spotlight in the dark, as I hold my heart, in fear that no one will hear
     and that's what i'm scared of, carnage and casualty, where no one cares.