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268 · Jan 2021
Numerous
Hopeless Outlet Jan 2021
Numerous things
It isn't like I can list them as they come to me
Just picking one thing is like picking specific strands
out of a bundle of hay
You are the way
You are the way
You are the way
I pictured love to be
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2018
Absence is a way to remember me
I wonder if that's just what you think

Your actions tend to get a reaction
Shocked when it isn't what you expect it to be

Think about it all
Before you blame it all
On me
Can't see you're in the wrong
Thinking it's okay for this to be

Contrary to popular belief when I speak on these things
I know the world doesn't revolve around me
Just kinda tired of the come and go folks.
250 · Mar 2019
Real friends
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2019
We're bonded not just by words
but by the truths
and
secrets
we keep for each other
Sometimes
250 · Jun 2018
Something from 2016
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2018
I'm the kind of ****** you would be if you didn't have distractions, see?

A dedicated glutton
as the feast is always full of things that make it hard to breathe
and sleep.
I really, don't know.
247 · Jul 2018
Shine
Hopeless Outlet Jul 2018
And for a moment, you were shining, and you never saw it.
But I did.
Its been long, since Ive seen that shine.
I think you lost it, when you lost yourself.
When you got stuck in a rut,and I had to move.
You knew it right?
That I couldnt be the one for you and I had to move.
But for a moment in time,you shined.
Did you glimpse mine, when I turned from you?
I missed mine too, right?
Yeah I think I did.
My light.
Seeing something special in someone
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2018
Words, they're stuck and stumbling, from the tip of my tongue
numb lips unfrozen
when your image runs across
My tear stained reddened eyes!
Can I call this love a cancer?
Can I call this love a cancer?

Cuz I breathe in your laughter and smiles like smoke!
And I'd happily smile and choke!
If its the last thing I see, before I croak!
Can I call this love a cancer?

My heart its been so cold!
If I had a dollar for everytime someone told me they loved me, Id be broke!
What makes me so special, an abundance of self-doubt
Can you rip out your eyes and trade with me?
Ive ripped out mine so I could take yours
and see what you say you see
What you seem to believe
you see.....
In me!
Sometimes I like to write my own lyrics to songs, that I listen to.
This one was written a few years ago, while I listened to Dance Gavin Dance's "People you Know."
233 · Aug 2018
Substance
Hopeless Outlet Aug 2018
Substance.
Without all is lost.
Nothing is attracted, just always subtracted from the equation
With too much, only an equal amount in turn, can balance out the scales.

Substance,in many I find lacking
Staring into the mirror
it becomes more evident
that I myself,
may even be without.
Old ****.
230 · May 2019
my sometimes headspace
Hopeless Outlet May 2019
An event
overthink
paranoia
mistrust
momentary clarity
shaken delusion

An event
overthink
paranoia
mistrust
momentary clarity
shaken delusion.....


an event.....
227 · May 2019
lost my muse
Hopeless Outlet May 2019
Not a thing written in months
my muse has left me
like a scent in the wind
something simply sweet
has abandoned me

In my lonesome, I hear whispered lines and words
but as I turn to hear these lovely things they flee, escaping me
Woe is me, woe is me

Alone with simply sweet fleeing things

My soul weeps
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2018
The faults of men (males)
And the sadness they create
With the words on their tongue
or tone in their voice

The way he touched her hair
how his hand lingered there
as nostrils flared
and you knew when he was close
It wasn't the scent of you he inhaled

The sin in his eyes
and how you could see it begin there
Before anything awkward began

The fault of man and how his soul glittered in the back in his eyes as you wept and stared
and let you know......

You were no longer mine.
225 · Jun 2019
Dream canon
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2019
I dream of witches
And when I would find them
They'd always cast a spell.

But never would I fear
I should not be here
Demons belong in hell....

Her screaming says it all
someone must fall
blood moon please save us all
As vision turned to black
there was discord and bells
heavy lust as we all fell....

but never fear
we should not be here
demons belong in hell...
224 · Jul 2019
To my Japanese Denim
Hopeless Outlet Jul 2019
When the sun hits
You shine with a stronger light in your eyes
then the stars in the sky
More than a well within you
You're an uncharted body of water
That none have yet to discover
I've never learned to swim
without eventually causing myself to drown
But when I'm this close to you
I'm not afraid to flow with your current
One day I hope to get to the depths
where no one's eyes have been
I want to become king of Atlantis
I want to understand how to live
with the sea and understand it's needs
I want to be quite like Poseidon
let go and breathe
You're like no person above

You are the ocean
I write about my girlfriend from time to time
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2019
I now remember on this bus ride
I used to look to the sky
see the clouds float by
now I keep my head to the ground
and I've been down
I've been down

I remember I used to keep my head in the clouds
and let my mind roam around
but sooner or later
you can no longer pretend
What's around, whats around
and it gets me down
it gets me down

But I'll still say I love you
I haven't lost hope in life just yet
and may we stay true
to the best that they can see in you
the best that they see in you
217 · May 2019
An hour in
Hopeless Outlet May 2019
We'll judge you when we're high
when we're high
You're a creature, you're divine
You're my comfort love
you are fine

I will judge you in my mind
I will judge you in my mind

You're a story you're a lie
Educate me when you smile
Beauty thank you that I'm high
Darling thank you that I'm high

So I could judge you
in my mind
Sort of like a magazine photo
I'll stare at late at night
So I could love you till I die

Fully in my mind when we're high
when we're high
You're a creature you're divine
You're my comfort love
you are fine

I will judge you in my mind
I will judge you in my mind

You're a story you're a lie
Educate me when you smile
Beauty thank you I'm high
Darling thank you that I'm high

So I could judge you
in my mind
So I'll convulse you
In my mind
So I could love you till I die

Fully in my mind
201 · Oct 2018
Depression at it's finest
Hopeless Outlet Oct 2018
....No one really makes me happy anymore
More like half smiles to a face broken in many places
by unfallen tear streaks
and frowns
Emitting noise just to see if it would be heard
Saying I love you, just to see if
I believe the words
coming from my own mouth.
I said I'd stick around
but those machines inside are running
down
down
down and soon the energy
keeping me up
is going to run out
So I should start running now....?
Old piece
191 · Nov 2018
raindrop
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2018
A raindrop from the sky
A cruel mimic
of what happened to my heart
How far it fell when you left my heart

Im slipping away,
I just hope you're going through the same

The same way
right to the bottom of the sea

Like a raindrop from the sky
Old feelings and old things
189 · Feb 2020
Disbelief in self
Hopeless Outlet Feb 2020
I ask myself so many times,
"Why are you here and what do you stand for?"
To have someone so good and amazing in my life
just seems so wrong but how strong, how strong
You must be to stay here and stay as you are

There's no reason for me to admit the obvious
who am I to deserve such a miracle in the form of you
In the real world, it's never supposed to work out like this, am I dreaming it this?
I mean you told me you love me!
How real could this be? Im suffocating in my disbelief... I'm suffocating in what you've called nothing special, when I've seen nothing short of perfect...

I've been sick with this fever of confliction
Wanting to say the three words, the same three words you've whispered in your sleep, and in my dreams, but what holds me back is my fear

The fear that you won't react the same way I do
When I hear them, not that you'd reject them
but soon that you'll realize I could never amount to the man you believe I could be, no
never do I believe that could be me...

I remember every moment we shared
every time you showed me you cared
I tried my best to be the best I could for you
I'd drop all of my life to prove what I mean

I'll somehow overcome my gears
I never want you to go, I never want you to leave
I want you to stay with me
I want to hold your face in my hands and admit even though I'm nothing
I'll fight to be everything

Just so you can hear me say I love you
You'll tell me you love me
and we'll both believe
ever feel like something you wrote long ago has only become relevant now?
184 · Mar 2018
Sing
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2018
My soul is set on
'visible'
when
I'm in
the shower.
I sing in the shower. XD
182 · Oct 2018
Not you, just the feeling
Hopeless Outlet Oct 2018
I don't wish to have you back
Only to feel that same lightheartedness, without the weight of the world on my shoulders
because someone special
was
just
here
When you just miss having a someone
182 · Aug 2019
Staring into her eyes
Hopeless Outlet Aug 2019
She said "You have lips like clouds"
Like something only an angel would know, ya know

I believe you're magical, a fact you've shown
I've read so many books, so would know
I just thought you should know

I wasn't willing
to share, to share
trying to open your heart, oh boy don't you dare

I want you in
in the most intricate way
Im sprung and spinning
like im caught in a web

I see you there
I see you there
I see you there
I see you there
180 · Jan 2019
through the mirror
Hopeless Outlet Jan 2019
In this moment I noticed
it was rare I'd have a hopeful response

My greatest belief was in disappoinment
against my will I lost faith in hope

And until it comes true
your words will always be false
until you make it come into fruition

The seeing was my believing
177 · Jun 2019
Head to the ground
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2019
I never look to the sky
I never admire natures wonders
I don't find the sweetness in a baby's laughter
or the reckless abandonment of fun with mans best friend
I sleep to this vision
I wake to it
I live to see it, while my breath is held
I yearn for it

Oh how much can the heart give?

How much can I express, before I no longer live?

Do you know how precious it is?

Oh my dove, the love I now have for your smile, my dear

Ive finally looked at the sky
173 · Jun 2019
Always trust unearned
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2019
When you spoke
I listened to your words
And against my better judgement
Let them sink into my heart
And believed every single part

Call me naive if you want
I just opened my heart
Call me a fool if you want
I've felt it often enough


Well...that was just my mistake...
I should have read between the lies
Not sure if I posted this. Oh well
170 · Aug 2018
Night thoughts
Hopeless Outlet Aug 2018
Lay awake and sing along to the songs you like to sing
Hit repeat

Feel a sting, unexpectedly
Which it makes you think
about how such a beautiful thing
fell and crumbled at your feet

Looking in a mirror
I can only blame the one looking back at me
I need to sleep, I need to sleep
But Im too scared
to dream
169 · Jan 2021
Words
Hopeless Outlet Jan 2021
I don't know what's worse
You realizing my heart wasn't open to you
or me realizing
I wasted your time
and filled it with sadness.
169 · Nov 2018
Technologic messages
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2018
Eyes scan the memoirs of an existence through numerical sequences

The conquering emotion is sadness

My heart flickers down onto the scale
teetering between hope and damnation

Oh,the weight has been heavy

May you find someone with wings
in time,to bless you with better dreams.
165 · Dec 2018
An experience
Hopeless Outlet Dec 2018
Like an empty cavern
This hollow secret place was once barred and closed off

Till you stepped in like a miner
with your lamp of words and touch

You turned this place into your home
little did I know, day by day
You'd dig in close
And chip away at me
more and more

Till the day you cast me like a die in a game
I couldn't yet know I was to be a pit stop
on your road to find a place to go
I was not the knight that had come to rescue you, if only it were so
I went from being a lonely soul
To now understanding what more the world could hold

I know it wasn't the end goal
But my naivety
Left me without a way to know that I would be
a paper castle in a storm....
165 · Nov 2018
Questioning Love
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2018
What exactly, is love?

A flickering candle that can be snuffed,
or a volcano that can only erupt when there's too much pressure on it...?

What is true and what is pure?
Does it count if it's out of hate or spite?

Does the spoken three-word saying, actually mean anything?

Can you have it and so easily take it away?

If that is so....then whats the point?

If you know it to be true in your heart, if you want it, then why avoid it and pretend it never existed?
161 · Mar 2018
Something
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2018
You ain't see nothing
You ain't see nothing
How could you even say that
How could you even say that

There's no one better
There's no one better
How could you even say that
How could you even say that

If I ,could see through your eyes
Well then I, could live a life

You ain't see nothing wrong
With me
There's no one better
than you

Something makes you
Something makes you
perfect.....
Repetitive, but so is thought.
Hopeless Outlet Jan 2019
There was a sun
Not enough time to wonder where the clouds went
My friends said I still don't hang
I picked time with you over time with them
Only because this was a different kind of light
I got a chance at a different kind of sight
A world where hope wasn't just a word others told you to hold
I ended up swallowed in what was and not what it had become
The clouds returned
And then again, came the rain.
Hopeless Outlet Jan 2020
The hardest part is the start
when you're unsure
as you stare into their eyes
are their feelings pure
are their intentions honest and clear

what kind of bed do your words rest on?
am I just another life to be led on
another soul to be fed on
another heart to be stepped on
which side of the scale will we ride on

it's hard to question the good
it's hard to expect the bad
it's hard to give up on the past
it's hard to wonder if this sweet feeling will last

I think I'm ready to heal
I think I'm ready to feel your words
I think I'm ready to heal
I think I'm ready to open you up to my world

So here's your ticket
Fly in, fly in, fly in
don't you dare make me regret it
157 · Nov 2018
Somewhere thoughts & magic
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2018
Sometimes I feel like a spectre
drained of all my joy like I'm at a party for dementors
Ooo sometimes I feel so restrained
ooo sometimes the prison is my brain

Patronus
I'm phoning
please come light the way

Patronus
I might be folding
I'm trying not to lose your face....
155 · May 2018
A provocative experience
Hopeless Outlet May 2018
Feel this beat in your bones
Let me know when you never wanna go home
Tell me when you wanna go slow
Show me how you want this more

Now get in line
No, there's no standing by
Your time is now
Wreck my ******* life
Wreck my ******* life
Lemme breathe into those thighs
Don't believe I won't bite
Cuz I might

Uh-oh,we lost track of time
And now it's 5
Continue in the morning
Place your head on mine
Explosion time!
I was listening to fall out boy xD
146 · Apr 2019
galaxy eyes
Hopeless Outlet Apr 2019
I bet if she looked at you in the same way

You'd offer up your heart to her

right out of your ******* chest
145 · Feb 2020
If Love
Hopeless Outlet Feb 2020
Stripped down to the most basic of actions
Can my lips carry my every feeling
needs and wishes
Would you get all of that with just a kiss

If love was an ocean
then my tides just come in
and I'm just killing time
thinking of ways to make you mine....

And maybe I, maybe I could never love you the same
maybe it'd be a mistake to try again
but there's more to this
but there's more to this

If love was the moon
then it's just been eclipsed
and I'm just wasting time
thinking of ways to get you off my mind...

Without anchors, I'm swimming till I'm dying
well that doesn't make much sense
unless you could feel the way I'm feeling

And if love was a wrist
I've just reached the bone
and I'm just killing time
thinking of ways to go on....

I'll be crawling into so many holes
looking for a place to call home
still nothing is the same
as when I was in your space

And if love was a heart
yours is so far gone
and I'm just wasting time
thinking of ways, thinking of ways
to be rid of mine
something different from the usual
143 · Jan 2021
Outside
Hopeless Outlet Jan 2021
Hesitation
I felt it as I tried to step forward
Outside, I've come to realize.....
All is fire
142 · Nov 2019
On July 3rd you became mine
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2019
I kinda smiled while listening to a song
noticed this guys always writing about loss and love
It caught me a bit off guard
only because it's a pretty nice thing to write about
and for me it's been awhile

That's not to say I haven't been happy
there's a moment atleast once a day
where the thought of you chases the sad clouds away
and even when I'm down you can turn a frown into a smile

in your arms I can turn my brain off
in your eyes I can see a knight in shining armor
if I spend too long pressed against your lips
the world stands still, pausing all my thoughts

I can admit I'm in love
I can admit I'm in love
I can admit I'm in love
<3
Hopeless Outlet Jun 2020
Every single day
A life fades away
And every time I read an article
I wonder if one day someone will read my name.
The thoughts persist.
140 · Sep 2019
When you forget
Hopeless Outlet Sep 2019
I keep forgetting to refrain from taking purchase in your words
You wound me and don't notice
Like I've noticed, your eyes
The way they hold me, still
Your smile
Your embrace
Oh boy, I love. You.
All of you
Everything.
Ah. I didn't expect to hear that
I forgot
Once again, a wound.
It's been awhile.....I'm not sure if I'm going to continue writing....
140 · Mar 2020
Stuck in your past
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2020
Through your tears
And my actions
Our fire went out
Our fire went out

your voice echoing
we're better than this
when you've broken down
when you've broken down

Though I have found
A life without love
just feels like I've drowned

Your heart now in a home without doors
this experience constructed your decor
Out of memories
Guilt, blame, and shame
A spell left behind keeps
you locked away.....
Maybe someone can release you
someday
Hopeless Outlet Feb 2019
The sooner you accept
that they won't see you for who you really are
the sooner you can bottle it all up
and
pretend to be who they want you to be
136 · Jul 2019
vague venting
Hopeless Outlet Jul 2019
Ive done alot of thinking on my own
been looking for a way to turn it off
this is where I tell you things have been hard
this is where I just brush it off
this is where I smile and throw you off
and like always this is when I see
I pulled it off
and we're back to how you are
how things for you went wrong

I don't want your eyes on me
Sometimes I wish someone could see
I don't want your eyes on me
sometimes wishing I could just leave
keeps me going
133 · Nov 2018
Teenage years
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2018
I wait, you show
I smirk, you smile
We walk, hands reach
Grab hold, just joy
That's lovely.
Just one of those things
133 · Nov 2019
Quiet Feelings
Hopeless Outlet Nov 2019
This is about the woman that I love
well more on how she makes me feel
The thoughts that fill my head
when she's near
and when I'm far

detaching is part of my schedule
it helps me stop my mind from overflowing
a temporary peace
that's needed, but I wanna breach that dam

I've gotta admit, I'm coming to realize
how heavy the past can be
like infinite internal suffering
but why is it that you can make me feel like I'm floating
Like I'm above all the negativity that feels imbedded within me

I'm more afraid of how much happiness i feel I've attained
I'm even more afraid of chasing you away
when I say the things I say

I wanna be who you see when you look at me...
not exactly what I wanted to get out but eh
132 · Dec 2018
The deepest feelings...
Hopeless Outlet Dec 2018
Depths of the mind
Feelings arise, and fade
Like a wisp of smoke
Something peaks over the horizon
A conflicting emotion

Along the lines of something and nothing
Amidst a battle of my dark
and the yearn of a glimpse of your light....
I'm not alright
132 · Jul 19
Things haven't been easy
I smile
and I laugh
but quietly I mourn who I used to be

I joke
and I check in on you
but quietly
I'm losing sight of who I used to be

In moments of mental clarity
I can say maybe it's just in my head

But the past few days
in the dead of night
I constantly wonder if I'll really be alright

It feels like something is broken inside

I constantly wonder if I'll really be alright
it's been awhile , I just need an outlet
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2019
Hey why don't you come this way
Don't mind the mess in my room
It's only to match the state of my head

Disarray feels like home to me
My life's a mess
And it feels like home to me

You can come a little closer
I won't bite, unless that's what you want
And it's on your mind
kinda like mine

How long have I been dead
It's a little sad how I desire this dance
How long have I been empty
It's a little sad how you're here with me

Can't you see I'm searching for my purpose
I'm a lost cause
Hopeless Outlet Mar 2019
I'm not so sure of the end
But I vividly remember where it began
I knew of nothing
And then,you were there

....I'm...in...my....
Head

They say home is where the heart is
So I'm homeless, so I'm homeless
And they say don't think about it
But I'm broken, but I'm broken

Viewing from another angle
Trying to catch what I've missed
I need a friend
These thorns won't *****

And I'm back in my head.....

They say home is where the heart is
So I'm homeless, so I'm homeless
And they say don't think about it
But I'm broken, but I'm broken

Oh,what did I do...

Went to the doctor
For what I can't heal
Went to the carpenter
For what I can't build
Went to the church
For what prayer couldn't despell

I'm in my head.....again
This nightmare won't end
End of a sweet dream
As reality sets in.....
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