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"shitfaced" poems
Watchin' bikinis as they stroll, they show a lot of skin, but not much soul. You're out of your league boy, but that's OK. Tomorrow could be your lucky day. And you'll find me in that sunny weather, I'm gonna get myself together, till my skin turns into leather, down on the Redneck Riviera. "4x4s" sportin' bars-n-stars. Ball caps and tank tops, their hittin' the bars. Tattoos gettin ********* scarin' "tourys" away. It's alright Ma tomorrow's a beach day. And if you ain't a "toury" you're runnin' from your past. FBI, DEA or maybe the IRS. Past wives, past lives, AWOL. Everybody knows you here, but no one will tell. Non-com fly-boys with their Amerasian wives, bringin' 'em to America, given 'em better lives. Some stay together, but others will roam. They'll hit the street for money like they did back home. And you'll find me in that sunny weather, I'm gonna get myself together. Frankly Scarlet I don't give a **** about Tara. I'm down on the Redneck Riviera.
0
Jan 23, 2013
Jan 23, 2013 at 1:38 PM UTC
Down On The Redneck Riviera
In response to the text: *"who wants to get ********* this weekend?"* I reply: I'll bring donuts, Gatorade, and Cards Against Humanity. I tell the girls that the snacks are for them, so they don't get too drunk or hungover. But really I know myself too well, and I binge when I feel lonely. Its hard not to feel lonely, when you're the only sober one there. At the Party: Never Have I Ever reveals more than I ever thought it would. I might be the oldest, but I am by no means the most mature. Things I have never heard of, things I could have never thought of are things of which they speak. Two donuts are gone. Their alarms all go off at 10:00 for birth control. They take out their mini purse packs of 30 pills, no bigger than a credit card. I don't take birth control, because my periods are regular, and well: Depression+antidepressants+confusion of sexuality= no *** drive at all. I mean zip, zero, nothing. Leaving me to be the only ****** of the six girls here. Three donuts are gone. Hours ago though, I took my 300mg of Seroquel XR. I timed it just right. This time I won't fall asleep hours before everyone else 'Pong' requires drinking so I sit their and watch. Four donuts are gone Shots are taken. I pour more tea into my mug. Five Donuts are Gone Drunk face-timing old friends who have moved away results in much yelling, and her hanging up. I start a new group text where I talk only to myself. All Donuts are gone There is no wonder why alcohol and depression don't mix
0
Jun 16, 2015
Jun 16, 2015 at 11:48 PM UTC
I Have Depression And A Party To Go To (shortened version)
In response to the text: *"who wants to get ********* this weekend?"* I reply: I'll bring donuts, Gatorade, and Cards Against Humanity. I tell the girls that the snacks are for them, so they don't get too drunk or hungover. But really I know myself too well, and I binge when I feel lonely. Its hard not to feel lonely, when you're the only sober one there. At the Party: Never Have I Ever reveals more than I ever thought it would. I might be the oldest, but I am by no means the most mature. Things I have never heard of, things I could have never thought of are things of which they speak. Two donuts are gone. Their alarms all go off at 10:00 for birth control. They take out their mini purse packs of 30 pills, no bigger than a credit card. I don't take birth control, because my periods are regular, and well: Depression+antidepressants+confusion of sexuality= no *** drive at all. I mean zip, zero, nothing. Leaving me to be the only ****** of the six girls here. Three donuts are gone. Hours ago though, I took my 300mg of Seroquel XR. I timed it just right. This time I won't fall asleep hours before everyone else 'Pong' requires drinking so I sit their and watch. Four donuts are gone Shots are taken. I pour more tea into my mug. Five Donuts are Gone Drunk face-timing old friends who have moved away results in much yelling, and her hanging up. I start a new group text where I talk only to myself. All Donuts are gone There is no wonder why alcohol and depression don't mix
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28
Fireworks were cool. Framed metal chairs with woven nylon Americana on watered lawns on the outskirts of the edge of Los Angeles. Hairy neighbors, Miller Drafts and dog **** Sally ****** Jim on the corner, and Jim drank, or started again and wouldn’t stop, but was good with a flat tire and chain adjustment. His kid had a glove like a vacuum. His daughter was a ***** Sally afforded a Mexican gardener. Tim always had fireworks. He had gasoline and willed fireworks into his driveway. He had rope and a keg. Schatzky keep her cool. She had to. She worked the 5th and taught everyone’s kids. She taught their parents too, 10 years ago. Her son Donavan and her husband Keith lived for the 4th. Little pink houses and Jack and Diane kind of **** So they watched fireworks on flag hill while their neighbors ****** and got ********* and burnt their eyebrows. Donavan was ecstatic. Each year the hill was gilded in gold for Donavan and Keith and and Schatzky, because each 4th brought fire and explosives in a way they could never afford. Keith was more patriotic than most. He waited and enlisted and became a hero. Donavan watched on TV. Schatzky watched too. We won the first gulf war and everyone knew it: https://youtu.be/4gNhs2SRacs?t=1m10... They celebrated the fourth in baseball stadiums. They celebrated life and heroism and purpose, and they celebrated with F16s and the best explosives the peacetime nation offered. And Keith celebrated and embraced purpose. He even became a leader in the 2nd gulf war. Sally stopped ******* Jim. Jim wasn’t married anymore. His kid lowered Tim’s basement and didn’t steal the copper. Tim’s house was worth a fortune but it had a radon problem. Schatsky was accused of drowning her dog, but she didn’t do it. Jim still drinks; he’s smarter now. They all meet on flag hill every 4th. The fireworks aren’t as good. A lot of build up for a finale that feels like an accident. Water seeps through my jeans and no one can see my face as I limp home with a broken rubber sandal and a bucket of ice, a dog tied around my legs, and a kid face first on the grass, a wife whose friend drank our last beer an hour ago, a phone with  two-percent battery left and my mom wants to show me what fireworks look like in California.
0
Jul 5, 2016
Jul 5, 2016 at 2:12 AM UTC
Fireworks
Fireworks were cool. Framed metal chairs with woven nylon Americana on watered lawns on the outskirts of the edge of Los Angeles. Hairy neighbors, Miller Drafts and dog **** Sally ****** Jim on the corner, and Jim drank, or started again and wouldn’t stop, but was good with a flat tire and chain adjustment. His kid had a glove like a vacuum. His daughter was a ***** Sally afforded a Mexican gardener. Tim always had fireworks. He had gasoline and willed fireworks into his driveway. He had rope and a keg. Schatzky keep her cool. She had to. She worked the 5th and taught everyone’s kids. She taught their parents too, 10 years ago. Her son Donavan and her husband Keith lived for the 4th. Little pink houses and Jack and Diane kind of **** So they watched fireworks on flag hill while their neighbors ****** and got ********* and burnt their eyebrows. Donavan was ecstatic. Each year the hill was gilded in gold for Donavan and Keith and and Schatzky, because each 4th brought fire and explosives in a way they could never afford. Keith was more patriotic than most. He waited and enlisted and became a hero. Donavan watched on TV. Schatzky watched too. We won the first gulf war and everyone knew it: https://youtu.be/4gNhs2SRacs?t=1m10... They celebrated the fourth in baseball stadiums. They celebrated life and heroism and purpose, and they celebrated with F16s and the best explosives the peacetime nation offered. And Keith celebrated and embraced purpose. He even became a leader in the 2nd gulf war. Sally stopped ******* Jim. Jim wasn’t married anymore. His kid lowered Tim’s basement and didn’t steal the copper. Tim’s house was worth a fortune but it had a radon problem. Schatsky was accused of drowning her dog, but she didn’t do it. Jim still drinks; he’s smarter now. They all meet on flag hill every 4th. The fireworks aren’t as good. A lot of build up for a finale that feels like an accident. Water seeps through my jeans and no one can see my face as I limp home with a broken rubber sandal and a bucket of ice, a dog tied around my legs, and a kid face first on the grass, a wife whose friend drank our last beer an hour ago, a phone with  two-percent battery left and my mom wants to show me what fireworks look like in California.
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14
For the third time, I’ve found myself ********* in the reality of how I was perceived by the people who passed me on the sidewalk, or who met me at the party, or who took my heart and collided it with their hips. And by now even I know that I should know how the rest of the conversation will go. My cheekbones will grace the slander of a compliment skewed, a lust for my body ruined by misplaced intentions. My agreement to go back to his room was never welcomed by my head, but instead the sad bed with its sheets already turned down waits for me and I hate it. I hate it like an insomniac hates sleep, like the sun loves ice cream. For the third time, I’ve found myself smashed into a wall of circumstances, appearances cushioning the blow. My pretty face, my pretty face, my pretty face! God, how I’d love to put on a show so you could see how my mind tumbles across all the roads I know I shouldn’t be crossing. How my eyes dance on every temptation just waiting for the hand to be dealt, for the bet to be placed. For the third time, I’ve let myself be bound by the vibration of reassurance, by the ring of a telephone. I’ve lost a part of myself in you. How haphazardly ineloquent it all seems in my nightmares, how blessed the rest of the world must be to know this pain and be able to stop themselves from feeling it. How dark it is under your seat
0
Oct 23, 2014
Oct 23, 2014 at 9:28 PM UTC
Drunk
# *Imprinted   in to the  fleshwall- linings   of my very spirit resides a photo of you-- (staring at your computer screen)       with a genuine look  of shock           and disbelief.. ..And before I could even yell Sam I was receiving     by you the most horrendous,  publicly displayed cock-kick  I  have  ever  received. It only stayed out there for a short time but online, a "short time"               ..is exactly as an eternity;        So I pulled back  in self protection. I had been dickin'-around  out there in a whole 'nother poetic-realm.. playfully finding words and verse  comparing my wildly-passionate virility     to that of a well-honed precision,     high powered performance engine And two clear babes  showed up  in the comments    and let me know how impressed and affected they were by what it was they were reading.    So naturally,  me being a single man..          I responded.     I never knew them before, or ever saw them after.     End of story.*                     ..Almost. *Young,  beautiful Wildling-- I never knew you even gave two ficks and a **** Until I saw that picture  of you.. staring into your computer screen in raw,  disbelief--       ...the wind,  fully knocked out of your sails. So..  clearly you buried yourself in  multiple two-fingered  snorts of your favourite "spurned lover's"  little helper happy-juice.. and once you reached   the intended goal      of full-blown,  ********* You performed some of the most Machiavellian-shit I have ever seen in my life.              (But it fell short of its  intended goal.)* Nothing can remove you  from the love  of you                                         that I feel in my heart. *What you thought was destroyed, was immediately forgiven    Solely because of that picture  of you    that is now,  forever mine.  Solely.    There is a dream,  beautiful girl    ..And nothing  you can do                     can make it end.                   (The restoring of you   back to you                   is such a central part of that dream.)     The restoring of you, young beautiful..       You.                          Mm.     Shhh....   listen..*#
0
Jan 21, 2023
Jan 21, 2023 at 8:47 PM UTC
Cisterns..
# *Imprinted   in to the  fleshwall- linings   of my very spirit resides a photo of you-- (staring at your computer screen)       with a genuine look  of shock           and disbelief.. ..And before I could even yell Sam I was receiving     by you the most horrendous,  publicly displayed cock-kick  I  have  ever  received. It only stayed out there for a short time but online, a "short time"               ..is exactly as an eternity;        So I pulled back  in self protection. I had been dickin'-around  out there in a whole 'nother poetic-realm.. playfully finding words and verse  comparing my wildly-passionate virility     to that of a well-honed precision,     high powered performance engine And two clear babes  showed up  in the comments    and let me know how impressed and affected they were by what it was they were reading.    So naturally,  me being a single man..          I responded.     I never knew them before, or ever saw them after.     End of story.*                     ..Almost. *Young,  beautiful Wildling-- I never knew you even gave two ficks and a **** Until I saw that picture  of you.. staring into your computer screen in raw,  disbelief--       ...the wind,  fully knocked out of your sails. So..  clearly you buried yourself in  multiple two-fingered  snorts of your favourite "spurned lover's"  little helper happy-juice.. and once you reached   the intended goal      of full-blown,  ********* You performed some of the most Machiavellian-shit I have ever seen in my life.              (But it fell short of its  intended goal.)* Nothing can remove you  from the love  of you                                         that I feel in my heart. *What you thought was destroyed, was immediately forgiven    Solely because of that picture  of you    that is now,  forever mine.  Solely.    There is a dream,  beautiful girl    ..And nothing  you can do                     can make it end.                   (The restoring of you   back to you                   is such a central part of that dream.)     The restoring of you, young beautiful..       You.                          Mm.     Shhh....   listen..*#
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58
how horrible you are! mirrors crack upon your gaze and split you in two yelling and throwing tantrums, almost begging you to vanish from their reflections, so they can heal again the ugly truth - a part of the festering pile of **** you really are want more? sure you write about how wonderful a brand new day in your life is! -this is happening in an E.R. at 4:00 AM - no subtext last night was the best ever! drums, drugs, toxicity and debauchery -you beat the land lady to within an inch of her life, then ran from the cops for 4 miles, after which you fell down 4 flights of stairs in the park because you couldn’t see the railing properly - no subtext {new update! 158 people followed you} you’re a success. your blog is on fire. next day 281, day after - 590. you post pictures of yourself with women getting ********* and ****** -you didn’t score with either - no subtext you write old quotes that nobody’s heard in ages -said you started a trend and took pride in it - subtext you post made-up chats with ***** women trying to come on to you while you’re playing it cool -it was your pen pal asking you to stop being a fake cause she believes in who you actually are, so you tell her to **** off and block her. - no subtext the one thing you don’t write about is why you are such an ******* in a world full of ******** with nothing better to do than entertain others with a **** load of lies simply for the sake of recognition
0
May 9, 2013
May 9, 2013 at 3:53 AM UTC
The things you don't write about
is that how you feel? this is how you're feeling? And you tell me your mind is reeling and you can't keep your head straight and that's why you need to be ********* and I could never mean more to you I couldn't mean a thing to you my addiction keeps getting fed from every word you ever said and you say you know you say you know me so if you know me why would you hurt me and why do you keep me seizing grasping clutching for something that's not even there you care you say you care you want me to share why I get so angry why I get so frustrated why I get SO ******* FED UP your words I hold onto and the words you never say and you'll never say because you're not in the mood you're never in the mood to open yourself up to me you say you know me you say you know me better than I know me MY GOD you **** ME OFF and claw at my mind with your words that I find so alluring and I find you so alluring and you're beautiful and that mind your mind **** your mind and you ****** me with your mind and ideas and plans and then you use your hands and I'm caught again.
0
Oct 15, 2014
Oct 15, 2014 at 10:00 PM UTC
please read this with anger in your heart
I think we could be a good couple. Yeah, I think we could make it work. Is there something wrong with that? I think you're pretty. You think I'm pretty. I want to kiss your face and you want to kiss my face. I want to hold your hand and you want to hold my hand. You're cute and yeah, but also, and kinda, you know? Your dark brown eyes pierce through the burdens of everyday life and appeal to me. Your dark red lipstick is teasing and yells "hey let's be more than friends." I want that. I want to stay locked onto your eyes and I want to forever have your red lipstick smeared on my neck. I want you. You're blue dress is beautiful and stands out from all these slutty leopard spotted rags. Your face is radiant and shines over all these ********* makeup caked ****** I'm not afraid to tell you I love you and I hope you're not too afraid to love me. I want to hold you and smoke cigarettes with you until we're tired of them and then I want to kiss you until we're tired of that and then I want to talk to you about e e cummings because we'll never get tired of that. and I want you. Just you. you. .
0
Aug 5, 2012
Aug 5, 2012 at 2:16 AM UTC
/I/think/yeah/kind/but also/ your/yeah
Sorry, dude. I must admit I find it more than pathetic That you experience life With sorrow about some of it That you don’t have a drug To take to help appreciate Something that is amazing And really needs no chemical To help you exaggerate What is really going on And pretend it is better Or somehow transcendent As if water can be wetter. But it is as if time warped And I have gone backward To talk to myself about it And then zapped forward To see what a saturate What a wet-brained fool I was back then, it’s true. I was a tin-plated tool. I measured my existence One dime bag at a time Giggling with stoner friends About my forays into crime; Selling backs of skunk **** When nobody else had any Good stuff or bad stuff. And I was the one with plenty. Walking through Hollywood With stoner friends and flakes Singing as we stumbled along About life and what it takes To satisfy *** hounds those days. *** drugs and rock and roll And pride in our half-witted ways. Learning how to roll pinners Of a buddy’s stash on the sly While he was taking a whizz And couldn’t ask me why. Learning how to properly treat The remaining sticks and stones And confiscating the roaches When the others left them alone. That was the cannabis coalition The Sativa Society at its height. We worked in the daytime and Got ********* most every night. And sooner or later, on the job In the bathroom or on the roof. I didn’t think of it addiction. I still needed further proof. I needed to try to buy **** From a government man I met. Fortunately I bailed on that Before adding one more big regret. Life has gotten better since then No more outside dependence. I quit before the drugs became The entire focus of my existence.
0
Feb 6, 2016
Feb 6, 2016 at 6:32 PM UTC
BACK TO THE ****** AGE
Sorry, dude. I must admit I find it more than pathetic That you experience life With sorrow about some of it That you don’t have a drug To take to help appreciate Something that is amazing And really needs no chemical To help you exaggerate What is really going on And pretend it is better Or somehow transcendent As if water can be wetter. But it is as if time warped And I have gone backward To talk to myself about it And then zapped forward To see what a saturate What a wet-brained fool I was back then, it’s true. I was a tin-plated tool. I measured my existence One dime bag at a time Giggling with stoner friends About my forays into crime; Selling backs of skunk **** When nobody else had any Good stuff or bad stuff. And I was the one with plenty. Walking through Hollywood With stoner friends and flakes Singing as we stumbled along About life and what it takes To satisfy *** hounds those days. *** drugs and rock and roll And pride in our half-witted ways. Learning how to roll pinners Of a buddy’s stash on the sly While he was taking a whizz And couldn’t ask me why. Learning how to properly treat The remaining sticks and stones And confiscating the roaches When the others left them alone. That was the cannabis coalition The Sativa Society at its height. We worked in the daytime and Got ********* most every night. And sooner or later, on the job In the bathroom or on the roof. I didn’t think of it addiction. I still needed further proof. I needed to try to buy **** From a government man I met. Fortunately I bailed on that Before adding one more big regret. Life has gotten better since then No more outside dependence. I quit before the drugs became The entire focus of my existence.
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60
Oh mother dear, where do I begin? I do love you, mommy, I love you like a venomus snake, in which I run from, hoping to find shelter in my own mind, I run and I run and I run, only to find myself back again, because as much as I want to distance myself, from the mistakes you've made, I find myself drawn to the idea of change, but who am I kidding? In the back of my mind, I know you'll never change, I know you'll only get stuck deeper in your current ways, the way you need the ***** and the **** just to cope with the mistakes you've made, because you've never forgiven yourself, for everything you failed to change, and you'll never realize, that drinking yourself into a coma, won't change a ******* thing, but mommy, I love you, as you love me, in the only way we will ever know, We live in a small town, you live upstairs, and I live below, where I listen to you stomp about your little home, you were never light on your feet, and I can hear almost every move you make, which is kind of comforting, for if I can hear you, I know, you have not yet went on your daily trip, to that little store you head to every morning, around the same gravely time, 9 oclock the liquor store opens, and down the block you go, for your first dose of poison, its not very comforting to know, your slowing killing yourself with deadly liquids, You my dear, are the reason I hate alcohol, the reason I swore I'd never become you, it all leads back to you, the reason I can't sleep sometimes, just thinking about the one I call mom, and the way she started life mistakes early, thinking about the way you started drinking at just barely fourteen, maybe it wasnt your fault, maybe you were lead to the bottle, by some events around you, can we possibly blame your mother, was she cruel, did she not love you? I will never ask you these things, but may I say, curiouser and curiouser, I do get as time goes on, who made you like this? or was it all on your own? I can't help but believe you'll never get better, you'll always be a mom by day and a drinker by night, and sometimes, a drinker full time, stomping about with your ever so heavy steps, if i'd never met you, I'd swear you were a hundred pounds heavier, just from the way you walked, and sometimes fell, tumbling to the ground, breaking skin into cuts i'm curious about the day after, and you just say you fell, you don't tell the truth, I'd really rather you just say, okay, fine, it happened when I was ********* and still drinking, because as the saying goes, one is one too many, one more, is never enough, which is why you drink until you can keep your eyes open, no more, and then is the time you finally hit the floor, to wake up confused the next morning, only to start all over again, this be the cycle of the one I call mommy, mother dearest, I love you, in the best of ways, I love you so, that I can only be honest when I say, you have a problem and you need to change, but just the same, I love you, as you love me, in the only way, we will ever know
0
Sep 16, 2012
Sep 16, 2012 at 10:50 PM UTC
I love you, Mommy
Oh mother dear, where do I begin? I do love you, mommy, I love you like a venomus snake, in which I run from, hoping to find shelter in my own mind, I run and I run and I run, only to find myself back again, because as much as I want to distance myself, from the mistakes you've made, I find myself drawn to the idea of change, but who am I kidding? In the back of my mind, I know you'll never change, I know you'll only get stuck deeper in your current ways, the way you need the ***** and the **** just to cope with the mistakes you've made, because you've never forgiven yourself, for everything you failed to change, and you'll never realize, that drinking yourself into a coma, won't change a ******* thing, but mommy, I love you, as you love me, in the only way we will ever know, We live in a small town, you live upstairs, and I live below, where I listen to you stomp about your little home, you were never light on your feet, and I can hear almost every move you make, which is kind of comforting, for if I can hear you, I know, you have not yet went on your daily trip, to that little store you head to every morning, around the same gravely time, 9 oclock the liquor store opens, and down the block you go, for your first dose of poison, its not very comforting to know, your slowing killing yourself with deadly liquids, You my dear, are the reason I hate alcohol, the reason I swore I'd never become you, it all leads back to you, the reason I can't sleep sometimes, just thinking about the one I call mom, and the way she started life mistakes early, thinking about the way you started drinking at just barely fourteen, maybe it wasnt your fault, maybe you were lead to the bottle, by some events around you, can we possibly blame your mother, was she cruel, did she not love you? I will never ask you these things, but may I say, curiouser and curiouser, I do get as time goes on, who made you like this? or was it all on your own? I can't help but believe you'll never get better, you'll always be a mom by day and a drinker by night, and sometimes, a drinker full time, stomping about with your ever so heavy steps, if i'd never met you, I'd swear you were a hundred pounds heavier, just from the way you walked, and sometimes fell, tumbling to the ground, breaking skin into cuts i'm curious about the day after, and you just say you fell, you don't tell the truth, I'd really rather you just say, okay, fine, it happened when I was ********* and still drinking, because as the saying goes, one is one too many, one more, is never enough, which is why you drink until you can keep your eyes open, no more, and then is the time you finally hit the floor, to wake up confused the next morning, only to start all over again, this be the cycle of the one I call mommy, mother dearest, I love you, in the best of ways, I love you so, that I can only be honest when I say, you have a problem and you need to change, but just the same, I love you, as you love me, in the only way, we will ever know
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75
There was a time in my life when I was an expert at quarters. In fact, I was so good at it, every time I played, I would get more ********* than all the others. It wasn't about love or intimacy, it was about being the biggest bad *** But when I look back now, it may have been about being the biggest drunk *******
0
Apr 18, 2015
Apr 18, 2015 at 9:01 PM UTC
The Self-Realization of A Drunk *******
I am not a ******* parrot, you ********* ******* Dont tell me to repeat after you don't hush the room so everyone can hear me dont ******* tell me i need a beer so ill speak more. you are the biggest ******* i have ever met. Not everyone is outgiong not everyone feels comfortable in a large group of people not everyone is able to yell over your drunk *** im not sorry i can't speak very loudly im not sorry im shy im not sorry i am who i am but i am sorry that you can't have fun without getting drunk i am sorry that you can't treat your wife with respect i am sorry your kids had to put up with you as a father i am sorry i met you.
0
Nov 1, 2014
Nov 1, 2014 at 5:10 AM UTC
shyness ruined my night once again
We used to smoke **** together by the school. You were practically my sister and I loved you. You always had the good **** and you always had cigarettes. After a while **** was not enough. You showed up with ***** one day and we got ********* This went on too long. We feel into the habits our parents warned us against. We blew off friends and family, we lost relationships and trust but we had our **** and our ***** We had each other and that was all we needed. I remember when we shared our house and how happy we were. I would go to school because you made me. You would go to work so we could afford our life. When you got home, always a quarter after six, we would drink. One day, a Tuesday, you came home with junk. You said it was good stuff, you knew the chemist who made it. So we snorted. That's when it all started. We snorted, every time more and more. After maybe three years that was not enough. You were the first to stick that needle in your arm. I followed with the same ******* needle. Next was **** I stayed away from it but you shot up. Twice a day for months at a time. You quit your job and cashed in the money we had been saving for a car. I started to hate you. I ******* hated you and I told you everyday. Eventually I kicked heroin's demon off my back. I smoked **** and watched you fall apart. Their would be random guys at our house and you got only god knows how many diseases. All so you could get your ******* fix. A year ago today was the last time I saw you. I hope you read this and I hope you ******* hate yourself, Carol Dean.
0
Jul 26, 2012
Jul 26, 2012 at 12:20 AM UTC
Untitled
We used to smoke **** together by the school. You were practically my sister and I loved you. You always had the good **** and you always had cigarettes. After a while **** was not enough. You showed up with ***** one day and we got ********* This went on too long. We feel into the habits our parents warned us against. We blew off friends and family, we lost relationships and trust but we had our **** and our ***** We had each other and that was all we needed. I remember when we shared our house and how happy we were. I would go to school because you made me. You would go to work so we could afford our life. When you got home, always a quarter after six, we would drink. One day, a Tuesday, you came home with junk. You said it was good stuff, you knew the chemist who made it. So we snorted. That's when it all started. We snorted, every time more and more. After maybe three years that was not enough. You were the first to stick that needle in your arm. I followed with the same ******* needle. Next was **** I stayed away from it but you shot up. Twice a day for months at a time. You quit your job and cashed in the money we had been saving for a car. I started to hate you. I ******* hated you and I told you everyday. Eventually I kicked heroin's demon off my back. I smoked **** and watched you fall apart. Their would be random guys at our house and you got only god knows how many diseases. All so you could get your ******* fix. A year ago today was the last time I saw you. I hope you read this and I hope you ******* hate yourself, Carol Dean.
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33
You wonder sometimes, don't you, often as well, but maybe when you're in bed, or on public transportation. You wonder how they all do it, and how they all step like ants to a rhythm without numbers. You wonder how everyone else can possibly stand all of this ******* nonsense and not just blow up or snap and just lose their god **** minds. Start fires and explosions and **** prime ministers and presidents, and cry and **** and protest the meaninglessness of such a cruel gift as humanity. You wonder how everyone hasn't given up. All the while, everyone else wonders when everyone else will ******* lose it too.
0
Dec 26, 2014
Dec 26, 2014 at 8:25 PM UTC
********* Samurai."
feed it blood feed it ***** feed it drugs and razors smear it with cover up and send it off to get an education laugh at its ********* antics stab it in the back the way it taught you to feed it angst and *** feed it amusement at others misfortune watch it spend all your money and throw your children in a woodchipper witness a shattering mind observe its destructive nature feed it smoke feed it flame feed it heat and music listen to its laughter as it jumps off a building and shatters like glass on the ground below cage this hungry twisted creature and give in to its beautiful seduction feed it rage and feed it poison feed it your life because thats what it wants and you dont have the will power to fight so join it in hateful self abuse make wild love to it in the dead of night feed it your happiness and your depressions feed it your friends and pets **** your family and weep into the night with it by your side. then smile because its what you wanted when you gave in
0
Feb 7, 2010
Feb 7, 2010 at 11:15 AM UTC
twistedinside
It’s New Year’s Eve! Let’s get knee-walking plastered. Don’t eat anything today, It gets to your bloodstream faster. It’s Saint Patty’s Day! Let’s get ********* on green beer. I’m Irish, so I am entitled, you see And I won’t be again until next year. It’s my birthday! Let’s get plowed out of our minds. Let’s drink everything in sight And ***** every ***** we can find. It’s Saturday night now! Let’s do a bunch of beer bongs! Anything that’s okay with my gang It’s all good. It can’t be wrong. It’s Fourth of July today! Let’s have a picnic so we can drink. But not fancy cocktails for me. I don’t care for throwing up pink. It’s Labor Day today! Let’s do a chugalug contest today. We’ll laugh at nothing at all And drink the whole day away. It’s a sporting event tailgate party! Let’s get drunk together in a parking lot And act like the teenagers we think That we are when we really are not. It’s Happy Hour! Hooray! Let’s eat buffalo wings and imbibe And hope the cop that stops us Is okay with drunks or accepts a bribe. It’s a bachelor party right now! You don’t want to offend the host. Drink! Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow Well, it will be more sober than you think.
0
Sep 30, 2015
Sep 30, 2015 at 8:02 PM UTC
NOBLE TRADITION
We spill our coffee and reach for the paper towels We toss tons upon tubs of aluminum cans with the trash each hour We turn lights on in the middle of the day when the brightest beacon is all we need We stay glued to televisions evening in and morning out ANd don't even listen to what they're saying We sure hear it in the background Of our cell phone chats and screaming brats Need Need Need Is all they say Day after day WHy must we need these things so badly It takes more effort to get ********* and stupid Than to peacefully sit And think About anything in particular And nothing at the moment Or something in time But we do it anyways Week and week and weak ANd we wake up the next morning and toss the cans In a plastic bag WHich we throw in a bigger can Which gets picked up by this rolling thundering truck of a thing That burns more gas than a speedboat Which is what we're all riding through this life Rather than paddling down a gentle brook In a hollowed out tree Oh wait We cut all of those down to make more things Like post it notes we use once And then toss in another metal can With another plastic bag Which as you may guess Goes on and on in this excessive And perpetual cycle of total waste Those trees make pieces of plywood Which kids paint designs on And toss ***** back and forth into more plastic cups When we could just set our own glasses Around the place in random spots And they don't even need to be cups They could be fishbowls And you find a small item that does not need to be a ping pong ball it could be a lil toy lion or a seashell or a miniature book Or an acorn In fact Why do we even have houses in the first place It doesn't rain that often And when it does You might as well just climb under a tree Or duck into a cliff Or be ******* resourceful And find a natural solution Stop buying bag after bag after bag of plastic party cups Take the ones you already have and make someting fun You could use them to play a game where you build a palace By balancing the cups and making walls and such You can do that with anything you have in your house or outside or wherever you are Find the fun in things Think about the infitine number of things you could do with each item you see We should just sort through our dumps and take evertyhgin and make it into something useful Stop resource production completely And live naturally.
0
Aug 21, 2010
Aug 21, 2010 at 10:23 PM UTC
CHANGE
We spill our coffee and reach for the paper towels We toss tons upon tubs of aluminum cans with the trash each hour We turn lights on in the middle of the day when the brightest beacon is all we need We stay glued to televisions evening in and morning out ANd don't even listen to what they're saying We sure hear it in the background Of our cell phone chats and screaming brats Need Need Need Is all they say Day after day WHy must we need these things so badly It takes more effort to get ********* and stupid Than to peacefully sit And think About anything in particular And nothing at the moment Or something in time But we do it anyways Week and week and weak ANd we wake up the next morning and toss the cans In a plastic bag WHich we throw in a bigger can Which gets picked up by this rolling thundering truck of a thing That burns more gas than a speedboat Which is what we're all riding through this life Rather than paddling down a gentle brook In a hollowed out tree Oh wait We cut all of those down to make more things Like post it notes we use once And then toss in another metal can With another plastic bag Which as you may guess Goes on and on in this excessive And perpetual cycle of total waste Those trees make pieces of plywood Which kids paint designs on And toss ***** back and forth into more plastic cups When we could just set our own glasses Around the place in random spots And they don't even need to be cups They could be fishbowls And you find a small item that does not need to be a ping pong ball it could be a lil toy lion or a seashell or a miniature book Or an acorn In fact Why do we even have houses in the first place It doesn't rain that often And when it does You might as well just climb under a tree Or duck into a cliff Or be ******* resourceful And find a natural solution Stop buying bag after bag after bag of plastic party cups Take the ones you already have and make someting fun You could use them to play a game where you build a palace By balancing the cups and making walls and such You can do that with anything you have in your house or outside or wherever you are Find the fun in things Think about the infitine number of things you could do with each item you see We should just sort through our dumps and take evertyhgin and make it into something useful Stop resource production completely And live naturally.
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63
She's sick to her stomach of your ********* promises, Of the nights you promised to bring happiness and brought pain. She swallowed you up in the pit of her being And you Gargled inside her making her spit and splutter, She's in the gutter. And while she's down you pump your poison through her veins with nothing to gain, numbing her brain. Yet again, you mask the pain.
0
Aug 14, 2015
Aug 14, 2015 at 5:39 PM UTC
Whiskey
Addiction offers so many Glamorous ways to die. It’s total wonder to me Why everyone doesn’t try. You can get almost all of the Diseases known to man. No other kind of dissolution Gives what addiction can. There’s diabetes, and then gout And pancreatitis too. All these devastating kinds Of hell are there for you. You lose your toes and hands And maybe you go blind Or maybe your very guts Begin to commit inner crimes. You lose all morality And rob those you love. You hold the drug you take About fifty miles above Any care or real concern For those you may destroy. You become a liar and a thief Just a typical growing boy. Nobody trusts, they run away And leave you to suffer alone. Life then turns itself into Your personal Twilight Zone. Suddenly your companions are Just as ********* as you. You are the lowlife you ridiculed Back a just year or two. So go right on calling it That drinking game you do; Partying and social stuff Until you know you are through. That may not be until they throw The dirt over your casket. For now, have fun on your trip To hell in a hand basket.
0
Oct 16, 2016
Oct 16, 2016 at 6:18 PM UTC
ADDICTION GIFTS
Over the river And through Grant Woods Through Hallmark scenes we go. Through colors of white That are not quite right Not even for pissed-on snow. If Currier and Ives Tends to give you the hives You really might not want to go. By now we have cars And thank your stars No shoes for the horse to throw. Old men in jeans In bucolic scenes From a hundred years ago. Don’t be in a rush As driving through slush Can cause accidents, you know. Turkey and dressing And Parker rolls May suit the day just fine, But a warning here I’ll make it clear You might not like mulled wine. When you have eaten While women work The men can go off and drink. The men getting ********* A seasonal disgrace, The gals keep their minds on the sink. Later while driving back , The men passed out, The women behind the wheel. They women all try To figure out why They go through this yearly ordeal.
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Dec 20, 2015
Dec 20, 2015 at 3:21 PM UTC
OVER THE RIVER
Off we go with a loud hurrah dog and kid and stuff in the car buckling up and blasting some tunes singing along like a couple of loons. Taking a ride on a sunshine highway stopping off at finnegans wake we'll poke out our tongues at the world rushing by us and belly laugh wildly for belly laughs sake. We'll sing of tattoos and rowdy bar fights and rats lounging in vats of ale I'll silence myself as the bagpipes start blowing and smile as my little guy takes it away I'm not sure he quite understands what he's singing nor that he cares as he fist pumps the air I watch as he blushes at the lyrics with swears in then sings them quite loudly, as if I'm not there. This music you sent us, makes us feel alive and Kiss me I'm ********* is fun when your five not suitable listening for such tender ears but his grin is far wider than it's been in years. So God bless the Murphys and God bless you too for bringing such joy on our trip to the zoo.
0
Aug 15, 2014
Aug 15, 2014 at 3:57 AM UTC
God bless the Murphys
I’m a member of so many 21st counter cultures Of which there are so many we are rendered meaningless Wait, that’s not right, let me try again “I choose to ignore this. Cabin in the Woods” He says, The Ostrich Method, head in the sand And we’re running out of beer, I’m sobering up, Or rather it was a sobering moment Just more ammo for these moralists “Ohh, you’re a drain on society” – buzzkillers the lot of ‘em Probably religiouses with their ‘God’ and whatnot “Thou shalt not get ********* or whatever, I dunno I’ve never read that thing Meanwhile cook talk is running through my head “I’m pretty sure I’m dying” I tell him Passive aggressive. ****** Isolated, negative worldview Defeatism exemplified, the most educated generation ******* in the snow Ya, I know. We’re entitled but they sold us a false reality We can’t be anything we want, Jack, that’s a fallacy “But He’s alright” he tells her. I guess they’d been ******** on men I wanted no part of it – washed my hands of the whole affair Focusing instead on scotch and rapidly disappearing ice
0
Jul 29, 2014
Jul 29, 2014 at 9:19 PM UTC
21st
1. Stop looking at his Facebook profile. Seeing his posts tears your heart open again, especially when they're about you. You know that he is not worth your time. 2. Eat more. You need the nourishment. The number on the scale does not matter to anyone but you. Who cares if you went up from 102 to 108? No one. 3. Love yourself. There is nothing poetic or beautiful about getting ********* alone in your bedroom and stumbling drunkenly to the bathroom to cut yourself open. 4. Teach people how to treat you. Explain your boundaries. If someone doesn't respect them, cut them the **** off. They don't respect you. 5. Take more baths. It may force you to look at your naked body, but the warm water calms you down. 6. Do your ******* homework. It may not matter after high school, but it matters now. 7. Stop giving your heart to boys that won't even give your their time. He may claim to love you in the dark, but during the day you're just another **** to him. 8. Pursue that guy. Yeah, you might get hurt. But it'll be a lot of fun in the meantime. 9. Stop acting like you're above high school activities. You have a year and a half left, make the most of it. (Even if it's buying a poofy dress you'll never wear again and going to Snoball with your best friend.) 10. Buy more red lipstick. You feel like you can do anything when you wear it, and you deserve to feel like that all the time.
0
Jan 2, 2015
Jan 2, 2015 at 10:27 PM UTC
10 Resolutions I Probably Shouldn't Tell Anyone
Let's dance to oldies ********* and stumbling At five in the morning.
0
Jul 23, 2013
Jul 23, 2013 at 5:43 PM UTC
My kind of romance.
The waiter grabs another beer brining it to table 24. They send him for more water. He cusses as he walks back and forth He brings them the water the beer is gone. They send him for another. I pour him one. He brings it to the table. But not before asking me if we plan on getting ********* tonight. I tell him: "Yes. It's Amanda's birthday. Everyone is going out." He brings the table another beer. The fat man sitting there laughs. His laugh is curdled with an onset drunkenness. I pour another beer for a different waitress. I am counting the clock. She grabs the beer. And smiles with an honest smile. She is new. Unaware of the distain we all hold tightly. I pour another beer. I count the clock. Until we can get *********
0
Mar 7, 2015
Mar 7, 2015 at 2:31 PM UTC
Table 24