"gaslit" poems
#An Exegesis on the Humiliation of the Word
The world is ruled by darkness.
What appears as harmless is theater,
what pretends neutral is already bent.
The macrocosm corrodes;
and in the microcosm, its reflection gleams..
even in places meant to be sanctuaries of truth.
A poetry site,
born as refuge for broken voices,
becomes another stage of control.
Here too the phrase resounds:
neutralize the threat.
But neutralization is not annihilation.
It is paralysis.
It is psy-ops.
It is the removal of anxiety..
not a side-effect, but the aim itself.
Darkness builds its stage for this alone:
that the "angel of light"
may drown his own reckoning
beneath a world of deception-built self comfort,
so he need never feel
the truth he already knows.
Comfort is his curtain,
numbness his crown..
*the removal of his own anxiety;
his game.*
This is why the world is his theater--
*Darkness does not destroy at first..
it sedates, comforts, smothers.*
Hence..
The whole world is his fully gaslit stronghold,
..for now.
Fade back into the moment--
The young poet arrives,
bringing her unspoken pain,
her hope for words to heal.
Instead, her very wounds are seized as footholds.
Hearts. Reposts. Endless affirmation.
Not to strengthen her voice,
but to redirect it.
She is seduced into belonging,
and her trauma becomes currency.
Unresolved, her ache entwined with lust--
a sacrifice prepared for false altars.
The angel of light has done his work:
offering inclusion without transformation,
belonging without responsibility,
“light” without source.
The poet is neutralized.
Her searching silenced,
her voice absorbed into fog.
Those who carry this fog
cling to cowardice.
Unable to face the judgment within,
they align themselves to the herd;
envy-filled, they only know to mock.
Yet they replicate themselves,
so their refusal of Light
is never revealed--
*Perfectly exemplifying their "Great Example"
the most envy-based mocker of all.*
The microcosm mirrors the macrocosm.
What nations suffer,
individuals now endure--
Comfort without clarity.
Belonging without truth.
Safety without healing.
Yet the living Word endures.
Every attempt to humiliate it
only makes its fire burn clearer.
Carriers of darkness can swarm,
****** and smother..
but they cannot create.
The true word cannot be erased.
Unfiltered, unedited,
spoken from a reconciled temple,
it pierces fog.
It reveals.
It heals.
And so we speak..
not for ourselves alone,
but for those who come searching,
hoping that poetry
might still be a place
where pain can meet truth,
where silence breaks,
where Light is not withheld
but revealed.
#
Oct 3, 2025
Oct 3, 2025 at 10:59 PM UTC
"oh, there you are", and i’m not sure
where i’m supposed to have been
here we are again angelflower
tying stones to our chests and waiting to drown (this is okay,
i swear to god, or something like that
isnt that what i’m supposed to say?)
i want to set the world on fire, gaslit galaxy
isnt it so fitting? isnt it just perfect?
i wonder how many astronomy problems you havent solved
and you say, "god
this isn't important right now
how can you be a god when you're not immortal"
sometimes i think you can feel me bleeding from 1643 miles away
this isn’t neverland anymore--
what are you afraid of?
something about cornfields and misery heartbeats and
almost like you said something you shouldn’t have,isn’t it? you’re always
so proud,
you’re always so hungry.
by god, you old man, you weathered, withered, beast
grab a shovel, grab whatever you can
this isn’t neverland anymore--
this isn’t andromeda,no galaxy here,
no stars or planetary confinement,
and you were never icarus.
Dec 9, 2014
Dec 9, 2014 at 6:15 PM UTC
Damaged trust and marriage schemes
Held hostage in each others' dreams
Pinned to walls but flailing still
Forgotten values, failing wills
True love waits, we tell ourselves
True love gladly stacks the shelves
True love sets conditions and
True love does the dishes and
Slowly, slowly, we forget
Just why we're here and who we met
Another notch in wrinkled frowns
Where I keep getting lost and found
In roller-coaster ups and downs
I'm lost and lost and lost and found
Missing flights and toxic tongues
Catharsis found in tar-filled lungs
I lost myself in who I wasn't
And in what true love does and doesn't
Not quite gaslit, not quite safe
Playing back the ancient tape
We envy death for constancy-
Besmirching our own consciences
We forgo our emoluments
Too traumatized by precedents
But hush you tell me, no one knows
The pretzel-bending ways we grow
Forever twisting round and round
Lost and lost and lost and found
Now freaking out, now breaking down
Now glaciers found in evening gowns
Now agonizing 'Who am I?'s
Now dying fire in your eyes
At last the sunset settles debts
We tally up our last regrets
Relenting to incessant ghosts
Abandoning essential posts
'Til all that's left is loss and hurt
It burns and burns and burns and burns
And now I choke on orders filled
And mourn alone the youth we killed
I scrape the comb across my nettles
Pricking feelings, bleeding mettle
Finally free from ups and downs,
I find myself on solid ground
Oct 2, 2018
Oct 2, 2018 at 10:52 PM UTC
It's looking like
history books
and web pages
tell what once was
as an instructional
or, how to
for the future,
as every trend
spins on the same
blueberry,
and what once was
shall be, again.
I used to think
I might not have
the best grip on ****
because of that Cindy, and
her gaslit basement.
But my eyes are valid.
I'm not slitting throats,
I'm just taking notes
on this tragic situation.
Joker and The Fool.
I'm part of some kind
of severely ****** up system,
whether I wish it or not.
I better learn to smile.
So watch me. Here:
^_^
Everything's bound
to a simple rule.
Everything dies,
and everything is alive
with some participation.
I can't shake it from my mind.
Why should I?
All of my ancestors made the mistakes
I can't help
but bear repeating.
Why shouldn't I?
Oct 21, 2018
Oct 21, 2018 at 1:01 AM UTC
Violet Valley
Violent Valley
In unison
a painted progression
possession
Seen to the point of intrusion
Illusive
In a cloak of mercenary wander
A violet valley
of a crimson dawn
Drawn from scarlet billows
Where I seethe
Into a prison I saw
A vision blurred from yours
Under the heath of an adolescence
comes a lapse of time
in a spiritless essence
Godless
Unsheathing itself
In the beds of silence
the voice of a cobalt rebellion
Freedom stricken
Gaslit onto your lips
The index of incendiary
Rearing fruits of wonder
Where knowledge is set without bound
born from the dusk
of a violet valley
No truth knows where it has risen
For curiosity is kept unkempt
inside obscure tides
of thought from yours to mine.
Apr 1, 2019
Apr 1, 2019 at 4:25 AM UTC
How do you measure the once-was? The invisible? The void?
*The ache in my heart is not physiological,
although it may feel like it sometimes is.*
I can measure the words I write,
the words that get stuck in my throat.
The boxes of belongings left over. (You can narrow down a person’s
physical life by how many trips it
takes to Goodwill.)
How many songs can I now not stand?
How many scents are now trigger trapdoors?
Shall I count the number of times I’ve thought of you today?
No ******* thank you.
Measuring is for the birds.
The doctors and
the scientists.
I keep reaching inside and pulling out my still beating,
but rotting and decaying heart
only to be told it’s perfectly fine.
I refuse to be gaslit on my grief anymore.
Feb 23, 2022
Feb 23, 2022 at 10:00 PM UTC
--jonah’s Lot
gravel-stricken streets & gaslit lampposts;
I close my eyes to take it all in—
this new solitude I’ve found to host.
a sacred sort of song I sing--
[oh, how does it feel to be alone?]--
though still wrapped in Love to ward off the sting.
& though I feel strong in my shield of Stone,
I cannot help but turn back in slight,
& a saltiness creeps up from my anklebones.
--at the dock of the bay.
in the distance you shine with your Father’s glow,
a smile&touch; I have longed for since that June long ago,
& the knot in my stomach continues to grow.
greatness I see as your eyes blink to me
when the smoke billows between our twin heartstrings,
though Ben strikes that it’s time to be free.
so though my travels lead me in opposition to hellos,
you are loved, Eternally Loved,
is what I have always said & have always wanted you to know.
--a fisherman’s courage
His mast is rising & His sails are billowing &
I step out on the dock, reluctant,
then the sunset pours through the Captain’s hand.
“child, you know what you truly seek,
among the waves you’ve yearned&desired; a storm detour,
when I was the one in control of this Sea.”
He reaches out to pull me in,
“you’ve always been free to walk on water,”
& that first step resonates like an eternal din.
--resolve&glory;
**I depart in peace & with all the contentment I have discovered
[that I have found, that I have found],
& all I ever had to do was cling to the Anchor.**
Oct 18, 2012
Oct 18, 2012 at 8:54 AM UTC
gaslit streams of dreams
and now you're psychedelic
soaking in highs and higher you're
throwing me over the bridge
and under a bus but
_>is that a bucatti?_
and im telling you
_>no, its just another dead thing_
and that seems to catch your blown eyes for a moment
because you smile at me
as if I can't already see the phosphenes dancing behind your gaze but
not before you say
_>what if we could make it one?_
and now i'm smiling too because
_>who's to stop us?_
the night seemed impossible and
unfortunately, we were still awake.
Jul 22, 2018
Jul 22, 2018 at 12:47 PM UTC
Beneath the fiery lit town, a small girl glows
burning embers making a show.
Truth bleeds from her limbs, deep from her soul
seeking to win
His heart of course, bound with a lock
but she has the key to make it all stop.
They fit, clearly, despite the hopeless hub
can this really be love?
Stars raining to the soft earthen scene
dripping from smoldering lamps, their gaslit kerosene.
His eyes full of spectre and awe
hers swelled with hope in what she saw.
karmic-ly enchanted lovers from the start,
forever entangled with the vines pumping through their hearts.
Jul 9, 2010
Jul 9, 2010 at 10:09 AM UTC
I'm not crazy.
I lie to myself,
I ignore my body,
I eliminate my heart.
I'm not crazy,
I'm just dead.
Apr 6, 2021
Apr 6, 2021 at 5:30 PM UTC
In this night of swords and word
I've heard stories told by trolls and listened to them rigidly,sat on a log while fires burnt,and around me later,
learnt that all stories are not the same,do not come from the falling stars nor from the acrid fumes that spill from gaslit rooms or garrets where the poets and tellers of tales would groom their pens and sharpen wits
but rather from the little bits of life that we pass by
forgotten
and yet blink the eye and they appear again
quite clear
and here the ink runs dark like blood across the written page,stark and bold
more stories, listened to be read
and held tight in the whispering of the lightest breeze
as if I should sneeze, it would blow the words away
I stay forever
in the stories never heard
the unwrit of the spoken and not a word will pass me on the blind .side or pass wide of its intended mark.
More stories in the dark
more logs upon the fires we light
and more of more of things to
read,
just write.
Aug 5, 2013
Aug 5, 2013 at 4:27 PM UTC
the rose that grew from concrete
fossilized in my dreams
gaslit to believe, you were my everything
each deep breath, every spring it crept
my dreams reveal all secrets kept
i saw you cheat, i saw your deceit
i expose your lies, i burned the fleet
nobody does wrong by me without repercussions
your lies were dozens on dozens, webbed my worries
my first and only until you tainted the holy
Sep 28, 2022
Sep 28, 2022 at 7:29 PM UTC
an abundance of words is just as easily a void, and
i am dangerously close to forgetting how to speak.
there are jagged lines, meticulously spaced--
hues of lavender, rose, and pearl.
they tell a story of silence that has gone on too long.
look closer, or look away; silence.
when it was convenient, she would wipe up spilt blood--
but what about the knife? left sharp as ever
in my vulnerable hands, controlled by an even weaker mind.
so try to tell me you helped.
the brain is fragile: handle with care; vulnerable; easily shifted, moulded, changed, altered; the brain is the world and my world was in a state of collapse because in there
i killed my father (but sometimes he left me)
and i could trust my mother no matter how many reasons
she gave me not to.
but what's really ****** is that i'm not writing about what i was
trying to write. i am silenced. in my own writing,
in my own thoughts, i still struggle to put into words
how exactly it feels to question an entire reality,
to not even know who i am,
because my sense of the world around me is constricted,
restricted, and warped for a reason i couldn't understand
as a child and still don't understand now.
it feels like the middle of the ocean.
you can drown or pray for decent weather.
Jan 5, 2017
Jan 5, 2017 at 9:37 PM UTC
Starlight dances
in midnight blue
I wonder if
they can hear
this secret roaring
inside me
Gaslit tracks
running loops
over and over
reminds me
of drunk mad
chaos
stilled
by your steady pulse.
Small infinities
I don't want to let go of
I don't want you
distracted
of wild racing things
You ask me to breathe
and all I can take in
is lungfuls of
you you you
and the night sky you
and the cool wind drifts you
and dim light streets you
I am sober enough
again
But can't you see
I'm mad drunk on
you
Everybody's got a secret to hide
Yet it's the one I want
desperately told
on every inch
of skin on yours and
why don't eyes unfold
to meet mine
Don't you know it
In every strange flutter of me
trying to seek you out
small cramped excuses
like
the furtive soft lips on your cheek
when all they want to be is
somewhere else
anywhere else
I love the way it feels like
a new, strange, unsure hum
And another sleepless night.
Would I risk everything
just to feel something
again
Feb 26, 2016
Feb 26, 2016 at 8:34 AM UTC
You Know Who You Are
You Know What You've Done
Here Are The Furies Get Ready To Run.
You Dampened A Star
You Said It Was Fun
Now I Think You Should Swallow A Gun.
I Think You Are **** & I Hope You're Undone,
I Stare At The Sun & Know No Body Won,
Blind Spots Still Stun Then I See & I Shun.
I Will Never Become,
I Am My Own King,
Solve My Own Sum,
& Fortune I'll Bring.
He Took & Kept Taking,
So Gaslit I Was Shaking,
Is This My Own Making?
Was I My Own Breaking.
Wolves Wearing Cotton,
I've Never Forgotten,
Climb From Rock Bottom
Not One With What's Rotten.
Aug 23, 2018
Aug 23, 2018 at 11:08 PM UTC
I guess it was cuz he grew up an only child but
he never learned how to share.
I ask him how his day went
and he doesn't answer.
Sit in the silence and hate god for all his violence.
I want to take a break,
He tells me to empty my pockets if I need more space.
Why do they always make it feel like it's your fault when it starts to fall apart?
I'm not the one who ****** it up, I'm not the one who ****** this up!
May 22, 2017
May 22, 2017 at 4:00 AM UTC
sketch a thought
for the girl who wanders
the echoing halls of my mind,
depression’s cold cousin,
smooth as a seal’s fur,
reaching through barriers -
wrapping your fingers around my heart,
only to pull, pull, pull;
i am belly-up
my guts exposed
like the tears that dissipate in the wind
for her.
I once knew her:
mirror, mirror,
held up to myself
and i scream -
have i been a monster?
does the gaslit lamp provide enough light?
it misleads
disfigures
we mould ourselves to marry and martyr
before we know how to speak
truthfully
love is as real and painful as the scars on my back, your wrists, my lips, yours eyes,
my mirror mind
shattered.
you gave me magic,
i gave you happiness
and you returned it
signed: “return to sender”. packaged,
parceled-up,
compartmentalized,
fragmented;
pieces of a beautiful thing
cast out across the tide
pulled along by the current
then sunk
below the water’s surface -
freezing cold
and isolated.
i washed up on shore
in a land not quite Europe
not quite America
with all of the problems
both have,
lovelorn and lost;
i survived there,
somehow -
fresh eyes
drew me forward
to explore this land
in the wake of exploring
so much pain.
now my heart is full
but so is my mind:
with the knowledge of seven years,
who i’ve been,
who i will be,
because we have to change
because i wanted change
because i’m in love and too scared
to utter those words out loud
because i don’t want to rush
or ruin
or reverberate the madness.
i will love new
i will love strong
i will love genuinely
(even when it hurts)
and
i will not give up.
Dec 15, 2019
Dec 15, 2019 at 9:31 PM UTC
gaslit, bad trip
told my reality wasn’t happening
the present, in the moment
my cover is rupturing
for years i let your words cut me down
for years i let the shame run down
my bleeding face, kept up a violent pace
for who, for what, and why
for me, for you, why do I try
can never be right, stuck in wrong
can never be white, soaking in swan songs
Aug 23, 2022
Aug 23, 2022 at 10:54 AM UTC
Maybe it was unrequited love
Maybe it was limmerance
Maybe it was unrequited decency
Maybe you truly are my twin flame
Soul contracted to sleep forever
Maybe you were guilty
Maybe you were innocent
Maybe you gaslit me
Maybe I was a predator
Maybe you are a narcissist
Maybe you are just like me
Good intentioned, misunderstood
Then again the time has come
And I want off that ride
Dec 16, 2023
Dec 16, 2023 at 1:17 AM UTC
An utterance
A manifestation
An animation
Simple silence
Malignant migration
Brilliantly blind benign
Lumpy grouser
Projecting a gaslit shadow
Lambasted silhouette
Crooked contorted glimpse of reality
Line strung; hung languishingly in a beguiling brume
~............~
Slim plastic blast pack
Cardiac cavern, mimicking the undulating spree of the metronome
Selfish inclination
Selfless mutilation
Intrepid imp
Gullet fluttering with love's gestation
Inevitable indigestion
Retching the wretched
Peristalsis current
Acrid slurry
Piquant palate eternal
Melding the morrow
Flavorless aggregate collective
~----------~
When will I die?
Sooner is truer than a second longer
~----------~
Listliss vivacity
Sloth like drumlin
Upward lurching fixation
Stiff and frozen between the knees
Descending the function of speed and time
Caught in the current of a concrete stream
Molecular progression
Atomized and pass through the neddels' eye
~-----------~
When will I live
A second longer is truer than sooner
Aug 2, 2018
Aug 2, 2018 at 11:54 AM UTC
I once thought I was crazy
I doubted you were even real
I thought I was in a psych ward once
But reality has been revealed
I wasn't in a ****** bin
You and I had really met
And you did everything I thought
Now you claim that you regret
You beg for my forgiveness now
You say just one more try
But you made me think I was crazy
You made me wish to die
You lied and cheated and gaslit me
Till I was nothing but a shell
Then you left me for dead
You chose somebody else
It wasn't until I told you
That I had nothing left to give
I stopped giving you my time
And I remembered how to live
Now suddenly you need me back
News flash but I'm not blind
I finally see the truth for what it was
My whole world was realigned
You forced me to come to terms
With the full picture of us
And honestly I can not believe
I had ever gave a ****
Jan 5, 2025
Jan 5, 2025 at 3:39 AM UTC
The heat in my blood
That runs through my veins
It's in my roots
The pain from a name
The guilt and shame
It's in my roots
Rot and decay sits in the soil
And it's hard to breathe here
It's in my roots
Another trigger, another warning
And something is forming
Beneath the surface, I'm exploding
It's in my roots
I try to hide, mask it
Pretend it's not happening, gaslit
Trying hard to remain
To not go insane
It's in my roots
Jul 6, 2021
Jul 6, 2021 at 12:42 PM UTC
I have felt the stars' brutality
Sting my mind and body
Tears flow out red from my eyes
Tired of your stupid lies
I gave you food to eat
You left me in pain on the street
I followed your laws and decrees
You had my friends hanging on trees
You gaslit me, you told me what to do
When in the end, you know what's true
Betelgeuse tell me he's sorry
I do not believe his story
I am angry at all of you
What is there left to do?
It's either you or me who die
It will be decided after I cry
Stars of the milky way
Hope that you have time to pray
Because I'm stronger than you all
By my words alone, you will fall
Dec 3, 2021
Dec 3, 2021 at 12:36 AM UTC