Internal struggles brake into the exterior
Engulfing the smile that masks them
But the moment our eyes meet each other's gaze
All is stitched back together  
And the smile stretches across once more

Horrid memories finally faded
The sun's begun to shine through
And it seems as if this new day
Has finally forgotten about you

A lost soul with his book left wide open
Riddled with anxiety but still outspoken
Hard to understand while full of emotion
In search of finding lasting devotion

Another night comes to end replaced by sunrise
While shamefully witnessed through jaded hazel eyes
Morning smiles are met with awkward no replies
It seems as if recreation developed into the demise

Drown out the memories with another pile of powder
Railing line after line just to rid all the pain
Using these substances every waking hour
Geeked out my mind and feeling insane
Still it feels better then being alone

Reality is an illusion
That shelters from the unknown
But the walls easily dissolve
You just must accept the idea
You might never return

Empty, hollow
The world just feels so bare
He feels no one around him
Even really cares
Lost and feeling broken
Doesnt seem any fair
So he did what few would do
And took that very dare
Now caught up in his head
Inhaling toxic air
Cause in the end its over anyway
So I guess I'll see you there

The darkness surrounds beauty
One which is barely tamed
And in a moment
When all seemed hopeless
It was beauty who remained

What appeared to be love
Was in reality nothing but lust
Playing games with emotions creates
Invisible scars that cut deep
Leaving a hole where a heart used to be
Eventually it will refill
Hopefully this time it stays

Scattered ideas flooding the gates
Leaving behind tainted thoughts
The worst part about thinking
Is not having a clear idea
Of anything your thinking about

Where am I
Curiously traveling through life
On an empty journey for happiness
But only finding little episodes
In a moment
When all seemed clear
Another cloud storms the valley
And reality checks back in
So again I ask
Where am I

Rivers surge throughout the valley
The grey of the clouds engulfs any light
But in a moment all is clear
And has calmed
Until again
The storm takes hold of the valley
An endless cycle of chaosity

Endless sky 
Bleached with orange
And a touch of pink
Scenes like this
Showcase how a beautiful moment
Is only ever temporary

A hollow shell
Lays amongst stained glass
The only thing thing
Thats seems to enjoy his company

Mystical patterns fill the sky
An endless void
Consuming a lost soul
The serpent crowds the screen
And fills the darkness
Not with fear
But with acceptance

A beautiful smile
Radiates the energy of the sun
Green eyes fueling the source
With the shape of a goddess
Oblivious to his truth
And unwanting of his intentions
What is to be done
When there is no control of the situation

Emotions race
And thoughts begin to follow
Happiness is ripped away
In just one second

Back and fourth
Inside the mind
Like a scale
With the heavier
Always falling to the bottom

The positive wants to be there
But the rest wont allow it
It seems like it is showing
But in reality
That is the mask

The feeling of lonliness
Cannot be shooken
No matter the strength used

He just wants to feel belonged
But life is quick to show
The others that are
While keeping him in the dark

This is the escape
The only one he seems to have
And yet
He can't find the time
To get out

A bottle
Its where he feels most comfortable
Without feeling anything at all
It helps him escape
Without ever escaping
What a terrible ******* cycle

Feelings race through
Leaving a constant swirl of emotions
Stuck in his head

The lonliness
Is almost overbearable to him
But he seems to hide it well
Because most that see him
Don't ever really seem to tell

Anger affects him different
It comes randomly
For almost no reason at all
Makin him explode at the littlest ****
With the feeling of almost no control

The depression is the worst
Due to the others constantly
Increasing its intenseness

It stays with him
Never leaving and always waiting
Waiting to put him under its spell
And keep him there
Away from everything else

He is stuck with this everyday
Along with many others
Each just trying to make it
Through each day
ALIVE

Hands
Hands everywhere
Of all different sizes and colors

Each one
Goes into another perfectly
Its what they were meant for

While many have another other hand
One they can hold onto
Not me
Im stuck without

Feeling like a little child
Wanting to hold mommy's hand
And never let go
Except its not mommy's that I want
Its hers

I want it so bad
But am no closer to having it
Then when I first met her

Sitting here
Stuck between wanting to be with her
And finding it hard to talk to her

My whole life I've struggled with
Being able to express my emotions
So I do the only thing
I know
              And write

Sun brightens the early morning sky
Blue skies cover the earth like a blanket
But something feels different

The streets are bare
And little to no cars are seen commuting
The world has checked out
With no close sign of returning

The normal we have been used to
Now
Seems like an eternity ago

What we need now
Is positivity and courtesy
From everyone we can
Because we can't get anywhere
Without cooperation

The world may be shattering to pieces
But with the right mindset
We can get through this together
And make the world
Just a bit better
Than it was before

While trying so hard
Nothing seems to happen
No matter how much effort
He seems to put into it

Lonliness
Countinuously haunts him
And keeps him
From escaping

He wants so badly
To at least feel accepted
But
It doesn't seem to happen

So he sits alone
Trying to fill the void
With writing