Death is real...
You can never tell when you breathe your last...
so poems are my will...
**& mouthpiece when i return to mere dust

Steal the wings of my fear and I'll come down falling
Heal my wounds, wipe every tear shed while recalling
Treat me like you don't see I'm stuck in the past
Prove to me that blessings can touch even the cursed
Make me no promise then maybe I'll have faith
Come closer and let me savour in your sweet breath
Prove to me that you're true, that we will make it through
The storms experience has taught me we must face
Fill my world with warmth for it's an empty place
Maybe then I'd know the one I've been waiting for is you
Keep me safe in your embrace far way from hurt
Assemble every piece of my shattered heart
Paint a rainbow of tenderness in my dark sky
Don't cuddle me with words for words can lie
Be the sweetest and my favourite wine
Drug me with such affection that will tempt me to call you mine
For I desire to be called someone's love again
But I'm afraid it'll happen only if you prove you're worth the pain

Losing her was hell, the fire never died out,
ages later he still battled with the flames
for she'd dug deeper than a first cut should
and deracinating her evidently left a bruise
whose healing became an immense doubt.
By one whom he supposed was a blessing he was cursed
losing her redefined him for the worst
The flames endlessly conflagrated until he got addicted
to the volcanic infernos of his unmet desire...
and with eyes that had run out of tears
as all were shed through the instantaneous years,
he endured insomniac nights, battling his demons and monsters
with melancholic songs as a source of sermons and bolsters
but when he could fight no more the darkness his mind did think
he spewed it on paper in ink, if he couldn't find a hard drink
for like his liver, his Heart had no more room for all else but pain
and as a result, he neither forgave the past nor loved again…

A Flower blooming by the path lending fragrance to the earth
Getting trampled by the heel that doesn't see it's worth

And when I finally find love, I will breathe out
There's so many things I will speak about.
I will tell her about my dreams which all did doubt
my deafening silence in a quiet shout
I  will tell her about the cold that took me captive
how loneliness made my love life inactive
she will have to know how hectic it is to travel alone
something I have done since I was born.
I will tell her all the mistakes I made
in the course of exorcising the monsters in my head
when I find love I'll tell her of how everything did go wrong
How I waited for so ****** long
when I find love I'll place her finger above my chest
and let it rest,for life's test would have aced
when I find love I'll bury the past
and forget the thorny hilly roads passed
when I find love this time I'll be willing
to bow and respect every feeling.

Heartless is something I'd be without this Heart
But peaceful too because I'd be free of this Hurt

Love of truth
                      is
                        the Truth of Love

You'll find Him in the house of prayer
and when wondering on the road of sin
in your future, you'll find Him there
He was with thee where you've been
You'll find Him in thy realities
And even in thy thoughts and dreams
He'll see thee through fatalities
for He hears even thy silent screams
He'll be with thee in the battlefield
weeping the innocence getting killed
when thy enemies draw their swords
He'll  be an invisible armour and shield
You'll find Him on the knot of the rope
of hope, convincing thee not to stop
believing there'll be a better tomorrow
when you're drunk drowning in sorrow
He'll be with ye in thy desolation
when incarcerated and in isolation
At thy departure till thy arrival
He'll be thy comfort and survival
for He says He came for ye sinners,
to turn saddened failures into winners
When thy faith is but ashen embers
because ye feel nobody remembers
He'll lift thee higher for He's salvation
An answer to each and every question
Ye just have to ask and thee shall be given
knock and doors open, repent and thee shall be forgiven
Seek and thee shall find, He's one and the most kind*
When thee breathe He'll be the breath in the air
He's with thee right now... He's everywhere

Guarded the remnants of my broken heart
Gathered the pain, of course I was hurt
I told myself never to fall for another lie
Believed strongly knowing I'd rather die
But time gracefully flapped her wings
And with it came another who sweetly sings
I forgot all the promises myself I'd made
Couldn't reason with her draped in my head
I felt comfort in the blanket of her embrace
And safe taking the grace beneath her dress
She was a blossom only found in Fairland
Leaving me neither caution nor lesson learned
She was an opportunity I seized by the beard
A reckless adventure I'd hitherto feared
By the vast river of her charms swept away
So whether It's real or not, I'll take it day by day
Right at this moment I'm in love again
And future if it happens 'll take care of the pain

Are we too strong to survive the storms?
To hit the icebergs and never sink in never?
can the ship sail on to a glimpse of forever?
can we endure, can our feet carry us past the thorns?

I refuse to wait for a cool Angel when
Some hot Devil's here dying to Love me.*
I refuse to continue trudging the mud for something I might never find
I refuse to continue blindly tracking my Heart, that opportunity now goes to my mind

You don't know how much I've missed you
You don't know how much I hated the silence
you don't know the thousand words burning me
you don't know what you mean to me
you don't know the pain of not knowing
how you were doing, of sending a message
and getting a reply centuries later
no, you don't,cause you wouldn't think I'm not doing enough
you would know the hell I've gone through since
you ceased to speak to me
you don't know what special really means
that's what you are to me, a tattoo in my cardiac
if you knew, you would  give me the apology
I might never ask for, if you knew you could have heard the shout in my silence
if you knew, you would  have read between the lines

In the end the world grew small
And her earth harder
As you dropped further
Down and neared the inevitable fall
The sun in her mocking yellow
Awakened before your eyes
Each rise and rise
Smiling a hello
**** those days
When minutes crawled
The delays
While away,rolled
The ***** of your dreams
Alike Steady speedy rims
Of cars imagined forever
On and ever
The moments lost
Love toast
The many defeats won
Tightly and to melancholy prone.
At such times
Cool were the chimes
Of the bells of hope
That caressed HEART
and helped her beat not to stop.

I'm chasing the wrong dreams
so I might as well catch them
Wheels on rims
I guess I got to trust them
The game is the game whether I win or lose
I'm sticking to my wheels amid the chants ,past the boos
I'm caught up in the moment
Trapped in the torment
See things don't come fast life ain't no comet
It's unpredictable, won't rhyme as a sonnet
So I gotta be patient,though it stings like a hornet
And it's hard,call it finding a soulmate
I'm going without breaks
Albeit it pours ducks and drakes
Up for the bend, I'll see this till the end
I'm giving hope a chance
And faith another glance
Time keeps ticking, opportunities I'm seeking
Things are loading I can hear guns clicking
I'll do this like an addict, a day a packet of cigars
Or say serial killer,won't rest till I pull some triggers
I was born to rhyme for my time
Wisdom and philosophy is my crime
I see company in solitude
Longitude in latitude and
there's an altitude in my attitude
I don't do this for the sake
Like a hip hop beat for the shake
It's my therapy so like music
many dance to my bullets
And find solace in the sarcastic missiles I shoot
I'm an owl for the night
have no fright when I hoot
It's that scary melody that
might in a day fatten my wallet
It's a sad story to tell
that I see the world as it should be
*And live in it as it is,for I'm swayed
by winds of karma like the trees
But you'll realise we deserve better
when you add twos and the threes
It's just a gamble with words
trying to fix all them shards
I live everyday getting prepared for the worst
Funny when it comes it's like I didn't
Most tines I wish I hadn't but then
Wishes, if they were donkeys all else would ride
Hard to conceal all pains inside
Sometimes it feels like all has died
With only breath surviving having nowhere to hide
But we all know nowhere is such a safe place
And survival's just a game of chess
Sometimes I say things I too don't understand
But then why should I understand when I said them
If I said them I thought, if I thought I sought
If I sought it's from my mind or I bought
If I bought they were cheap otherwise it's the little wisdom I got
They never stop flowing they're like a river
And they're the phantoms in my head silently loud as a weaver
And I bleed them in lines and rhymes as a cure
To the breath of the ennui I endure
It's the greatest terrors on rolling wheels
It's me hiking the fears like rolling mills

There Was An Old Bird in A Nest,
At dawn,a weaver or nightingale at best;
But age had probably stolen every feather
Till he shivered a trifle under the weather
That sick Old Bird in A Nest

I broke no rule of yours
Just got tired of being told
After all I'm quite old
Enough to go by my own rules.

I never stopped trying to be yours...
no matter how much you pushed me away
no matter how clearly you showed me that I stood no chance
no matter the million times you threw me into a trance
no matter the uncountable times you denied me a  dance
with you to the melancholic ballad of life...
I never stopped trying to be yours
even after so many spiteful cold shoulders through years
even when you cost me Rivers, lakes and Oceans of tears
midst my fears, and even when drunk on beers
I never stopped trying to be yours...

I never stopped trying to be yours
even when you broke promise after promise
even after I knew you were a poisoned chalice
poisoned with pride and darkness inside
I never stopped trying to be yours even when
I knew you were a winter as I was inside
for I never ceased to believe together we would whither
all storms and rather than be mere guests in us find a
place we could call homes...

I never stopped trying to be yours regardless of
how much you despised me, the insults and all
I never stopped trying to have you whole
mind, body, heart and soul...

I never stopped and I never would hadn't you
pushed me beyond a point any heart could bear...
until you pulled so hard I deformed and couldn't snap back
I never stopped trying...

We met we smiled, we fell don't know if you remember... I remember the clouds were at war with the sun trying to stop him from burning like hell as you understand the scotch in December, but it wasn't that haze that made my heart burn for as soon as the ice in my soul was melted and the river of my passion started running again, I knew you were the bulb to be set at the front of my train and the warm orb with the Vitamin D for my sceptic wounds to turn into scar since my nomadic childhood had bruised me hard and torn me off the mass of attachment into a frigid island of desolation... As soon as I saw your teary eye twinkle like a star in the sky I knew I was on the right avenue even if I knew not my destination. In fact, I didn't need to know because you were someone I'd walk with as long as I lived and never want to rest. A wave that I'd surf to the dangerous crest even if I was a hydrophobic...a wave that swept me off my feet and totally changed my heartbeat...You found me confused and taught me which thread of emotion meant what. You found me too young and naive and taught me every little thing I know... Don't know if you remember but I remember the day we first hugged and you trembled in my arms, the peck in your neck... the evening walks to the golf course and our first kiss, it wasn't your first, but it was mine and it felt like your first or at least that's what you kept saying in two years. Those were the happiest and shortest years of my life for it was like I had everything I ever wanted... we always kept our promises, when I said I would call, I would… Gosh! It was great being yours and I'd do whatever to rewind even when I already know the ugly ending to the beautiful story...You taught me so much, right from who I didn't know I was to what I didn't know I needed, like novels and literature and you to understanding what it took to be a man... There was only one thing you didn't teach me, moving on once it was over... But am getting there, I know I keep saying that and you're tired of hearing it, I just hope someday I can look back and smile like you do otherwise I shall never forget those beautiful moments for as long as I shall live, so many unforgettable things you taught me, even the painful.... How can I ever thank you for the lessons that I learnt?